How To Cut Yourself Some Slack | Meditation with Vinny Ferraro

0:04This is the 10 % Happier podcast. I'm Dan Harris.

0:19Hello there. Happy Sunday. Hope you're having a good weekend. Today we've got a guided meditation for people who kick their own ass, which is probably everybody. It comes from Vinny Ferraro, who's our Teacher of the Month over at danharris.com. That means he is creating custom guided meditations for all of our Monday and Wednesday episodes on the podcast, but only for paid subscribers. Also for paid subscribers, he'll be doing in the month of September live guided meditation and Q &A sessions, some of them with me. If you sign up, you'll get all of that stuff. However, today, we're giving you a little teaser.

0:54This is one of the meditations he produced for the episodes that we have put behind the paywall, but actually we're gonna take this one here and drop it for free, hopefully as a way to entice you to join us over at danharris.com. Before we jump into the meditation, I just wanna quickly say that if you wanna meditate with me in person, I've got a couple of events coming up. One is on September 21st at the New York Insight Meditation Center. It's a half-day thing. The other is a weekend-long thing at the end of October. It's called the Meditation Party. I don't want to say too much right now because I want to let you start meditating, but I put some links in the show notes if you want to sign up for either or both.

1:32Okay, we'll get started with Vinny Ferraro right after this. Hey, it's Dan. I just want to tell you about something I'm really proud of, the new community we are building over on my new app, which is called 10 % with Dan Harris. Here's something I believe with no reservation. Taking care of your own mind is not selfish. It's actually essential if you want to show up for the world, if you want to deal with the various emergencies on the planet right now. There is, in fact, a geopolitical case for you to get your shit together. In other words, taking care of your own mind is good citizenship. I think about it like an upward spiral.

2:09You train your mind. That makes you happier and less reactive because you're steadier. That improves your relationships with everybody around you. And because relationships are crucial to human happiness, you get even happier. Then your relationships get even better and up you go. Our mission over at this new app is to guide you through this process with a growing library of meditations from world-class teachers like Seven A. Selassie and Joseph Goldstein and on and on. Also, add free access to our full podcast archive, exclusive live stream events where we guide meditations and take your questions.

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3:55I think many of us are taught to improve ourselves, fix ourselves, or at the very least, hide the parts that feel too messy, too needy, too much. But this practice isn't about self-improvement. It's about self-inclusion. So today, we're going to try to meet ourselves with kindness. Not because we earned it. Not because we did something spectacular. But because we can be so hard on ourselves. sometimes it can feel like don't gang up on me with me against me you know that feeling so we have to balance that out a bit let me just say you don't have to feel any great surge of love you don't have to fake anything You just have to be willing to turn toward yourself with even a little less judgment and a little more care.

5:17Okay, let's begin. Find the position that allows your body to feel supported and grounded.

5:30relaxed but alert

5:36and if it feels okay you may close your eyes it can help you turn your attention inward or maybe just soften your gaze

5:56And as you welcome yourself to the present moment, see if you can ease any demand you have on this being a certain way.

6:16And allow the breath to find its natural rhythm.

6:37And you don't have to do this right. There's no role to play here. There's no version of you to live up to. Let's just rest in this living, breathing presence.

7:08And we start with the body.

7:17Feeling all the points of contact, the chair, the cushion, the floor.

7:43The body, in many ways, is our home base.

8:06Bring to mind the part of yourself you usually overlook. Maybe it's something small or something quiet.

8:18Or some part of you that doesn't get thanked.

8:25A part that's just doing its best.

8:35Maybe it's your feet or your breath. Maybe your perseverance.

8:49Offer that part a little appreciation.

9:05A little thank you for holding you this whole time.

9:23Again, it doesn't have to feel like a flood of love, just a gesture of kindness.

9:47You've made it through things no one else may fully know.

9:56You've kept going. You've grown, you've cared.

10:11Let yourself receive that acknowledgement.

10:24This isn't self-indulging or ego. This is honesty.

10:44This is the heart recognizing the beauty of its own effort.

11:03Because we're still here.

11:14So without forcing it, offer your nervous system a new message.

11:26Thank you, body, for carrying me.

11:38Thank you, heart, for carrying so much.

11:49Thank you, breath, for always bringing me back.

12:11and maybe you can feel the warmth of that appreciation in your chest

12:30Let it spread outward into the shoulders, the arms, the belly.

13:02sometimes we can't really feel that much or there's parts of us that may resist it.

13:12They think maybe you don't deserve kindness or gratitude. That's okay. You don't have to force it.

13:27You're just offering an invitation.

13:51we allow ourselves a new message. It's okay to be kind to myself.