Britain's Toughest Cop: Taking on Gangsters and Drug Lords - Kevin Healy Tells All

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1:05FX's American Horror Story returns for an unrivaled 13th installment. With the iconic horrors you love to fear and an all-star cast reprising fan-favorite roles. Light your candles, draw your pentagrams, and prepare for a supreme surprise. F.X.'s American Horror Story 13. Now streaming on Hulu. Boom, we're on. Right, hello. And today's guest, Kev Healy, how are you, brother? I'm very good, and thanks for having me on. Thanks for coming on. Armed response, nearly 20 years. In the thick of it, shooting people. I also heard that you shoot dogs. That can be part of the role, yes. We can just go destroying an animal, but...

1:51Do you know what, mate? Humans I think Nah fuck them But dogs I think Oh no And I get it I understand it But it'll be good to touch on These sort of topics You were first You were front line Basically going through the doors First coming across Some of the world's Toughest criminals Thankfully we've not got A big gun culture here Like America Obviously people have guns If people have guns here It's majority Criminals Yes people have licenses Farmers Certain people who Can carry guns But Thankfully there's not Many guns here but they're still enough to cause harm and like i say you're a frontline you've also released a book what's the book called for people to maybe watch tune in maybe go and buy the book to have a look all right thank you for the for the plug um the book's called watch and react and it's about a 30-year career but predominantly it's about the 18 years i served on so19 which is the um the metropolitan police armed response vehicles and it's uh it's basically a my sort homage to it's i'm on it i'm in it but it's about the people who basically had my back for 18 years or 30 years the great people i work with male and female who day to day may come into work just an absolute buzz oh fantastic yeah yeah i don't think people appreciate just the quality of the police officer in the uk they really don't appreciate the the good men and women who come to work i think it's an incredibly honorable job you wake up you go to work and you're trying to do good uh in very difficult circumstances so the book was a book was a thank you to them i think anyone in emergency services do amazing work do god's work and i always say this in podcasts but where we are from in glasgow the police were always the enemy but it's not until i've interviewed police to realize what these people actually go through the bravery the mindset of losing that it's a very negative job you know and i think dark humor gets a lot of people through it the same as the scs the scs for me are the best armed forces in the world there's nobody to beat CSCS and there's a lot of people can walk about freely and like I spoke earlier I walk around London I don't see trouble I know it's there, I don't see violence, I don't see racism I see good people just walking along getting on with their day I think social media now, you can put a clip out on X or Instagram, it'll get millions of views and then automatically people think the world's a bad place, there's still badness goes on but thankfully for men like yourself, special services help prevent tip from not being as bad as what it is but before we get into everything though i always like to go back to the start with my guests okay get more of a bit of understanding about you where you grew up and how it all began uh i grew up in west london uh mum and dad were both irish immigrants who came over in the 60s um my dad um my dad went walkabout when i was about 10 leaving my mum to raise five kids little irish lady called eileen who's just um the reason we all succeeded because she was so strong.

4:43We lost our house, as you do, you know, when Dave Norman's playing, you couldn't pay the bills. And we ended up in a council house and a very, very interesting estate. And it was tough. It was very tough. It was a massive culture shock, ending up in this very rough estate. I was a Boy Scout at the time. I was just living the dream. And within a couple of weeks, my brother and I sacked the Scouts. We thought we're not going to survive going to boy scouts and my brother dragged me to a karate club took up karate in 77 and that introduction to shotokan karate just absolutely changed my life because the the knock-on effect was that i became obsessed with karate and just lived for it started to compete got on the british the national squad uh fought in the european championships started to meet people really interesting people people with big lives i started teaching at a club in london a place called the buddha kwai which had really interesting people training there and and it all the karate just opened my mind to a whole different world because you can get suffocated on a council estate you can get suffocated when you're poor and we were poor uh but i had a really my mom was nails loving tough irish lady holding down cleaning job cleaning job so we had food on the table she we never missed a day of school we you know we never We just were tough kids.

6:08We were resilient and with a sense of humor. Because no matter how much shit comes your way, you've got to laugh about stuff. What else are you going to do? And I think I took that mindset, coupled with the martial arts, a toughness. I discovered I had a toughness, a mental toughness and a physical one. I learned I didn't have a glass jaw. I learned I could take a dig. And I learned how to give a dig. I learned the rules of sparring. You know, don't take the mick. You know, play the game. You learn a lot of stuff when you do. combat sports i think i think it's essential to do combat sport my son boxes i'm very proud of him you know i'm just among my girls that my girls have just got to mention you're amazing but um but just like that whole world was tough and it was challenging and then one day i was teaching karate and someone said kev why don't you join the police you are a natural it's a shoo-in you love the whole roll around kind of environment i stuck an application in in uh in 91 i wore through the gates of hendon but i honestly think i succeeded because all that stuff with my broken home stuff very you know poor just makes you tough makes you it makes you sort of survive and makes you realize and what doesn't kill you does make you stronger yeah it's jesus it is it is but you know what a lot of coppers i've worked over the years and maybe the book touched on this people have reached out to me and said like you know my dad was this and my you know that happened and they were great cops because they had a sensitivity they were nails but i had they had stuff going on they got it they and uh it's a pleasure to be around people like that tough people but they had a heart of gold yeah and i think sometimes poor people come from a poor background gives you an extra excuse to something else there's an extra edge an extra roughness but there's only a very small percentage who go down the martial arts route or some sort of combat sports the rest come from the broken home you'll tend to see it being a police officer the majority of men in prison come from broken homes and they instead of i believe martial arts is i never really got into until my late 20s early 30s and i went to the grip house a couple of times a couple of sessions in Glasgow and because I got humbled so easily embarrassed so embarrassed because I realized I couldn't fight and then you get the encouragement from your kind of seniors come back just show up come back and after time you start to realize like you say you're not made of glass because I was a scared boy all my drink and drugs and it was to put on a fake mask that I had confidence yeah you know and I think a lot of people should do combat sports my nephew Cara he's under 14s boxing champion my daughter does muay thai my son james does mma so that is important i wish i got into it more younger i think i've had more dedication for life but they gave me a mindset yeah because when i was going to night clubs i've got into sticky situations i used to always be fearful but i would portray the man the mask of a clown as if i didn't care i was i was agitated yeah nervous and it's not until you'd like you say do sparring and people do try and take liberties some people but once you get stronger once you realise it's a game of chess and once you realise that you can move and the majority of people outside as well you just need to learn how to defend yourself absolutely because being in a fight you're tired after a fight it's probably the most exhausting thing in the world because it's the nerves there's a movement trying not to get hit trying to hit and the majority of people don't know how to throw a punch no and I'm no expert by the way but I've done enough sessions and I've done enough lessons I've done enough sparring I've had a couple of fights to realise that there's something special in it it's it's scary i still get scared sparring i still get nervous but after it's a sense of accomplishment absolutely facing those fears yeah i mean i've got respect for anybody who walks onto a mat walks gets into a ring who an octagon whatever because you're putting it all on the line you know whether it's an audience or not you've been tested against another individual and i think you learn so much through violence you know control violence whatever you learn about yourself you know you're great you gain respect from people because even if they pummel you it you but you keep getting up you keep sort of slugging away you gain some kind of belief in yourself like i'm not someone who's going to fold and i think the martial arts old box or whatever the martial art is it doesn't really matter as long as it's tough and it has a good sort of code to it i think they're absolutely fantastic best thing that happened to me was ever walking into a dojo yeah i met some of the hardest people some of the kindest people all rolled it up.

10:43I learned that you could be an incredibly dangerous individual and also have a heart of gold. You know, you can balance those two. You don't have to be a thug 24 hours a day. You can be a thug in the dojo, thug in the opera, whatever, and then you go home and you grate to your kids and you've got all that kind of madness out of you. What's the best thing is, nothing to prove. The people have nothing to prove. Aren't they the best? They're the calmest ones. Yeah. Hey y 'all, Kelly Clarkson here with Wayfair. You know my favourite compliment during the holidays? Your house feels so cozy. That's when I know everyone's comfortable enough to kick off their shoes, grab more dessert, and stay a little longer.

11:20Wayfair makes it easy, with everything from dining furniture to festive guest room essentials, all in one place. So whether you're hosting for an afternoon or all weekend, everyone feels right at home. Get holiday guests ready at Wayfair.com or on the Wayfair app today. Wayfair, every style, every home. FX's American Horror Story returns for an unrivaled 13th installment. With the iconic horrors you love to fear and an all-star cast reprising fan-favorite roles. Light your candles, draw your pentagrams, and prepare for a supreme surprise. FX's American Horror Story 13. Now streaming on Hulu. The people who I used to drink with and go around with when we were in nightclubs and pubs, we were always the loudest because it was like trying to prove something that we weren't scared, but every one of us were broken.

12:18Every one of us were scared. Even when I'd done a couple of judo classes, and again, it's like you're humbled again. You feel as if you've not mastered boxing, but when you know how to throw a dig and you know how to kind of defend yourself, you kind of try and move on to something else and you just get totally humbled. You're talking men in their 60s and 70s. who are just throwing you over their shoulder and again it's humble and you think I'm not coming back here and you have to start again but then I've got so much ego the same as everybody I think that's what makes us want to go back for more and kind of learn and grow but it's something special in learning a craft not what a war it is and I think like you say it calms the mind it's understanding that we're not all weak and it makes you stronger you've got to go through the weakness and the pain and the dark clouds to realise I'm not weak you know it takes it takes so much time or it takes so much effort well i see it isn't it it's that thing when you walk into a dojo whatever now you know i used to teach i taught for years and people would come in how long to be a black belt how long to like just forget all that nonsense just turn up the hardest thing you'll do is turn up twice a week now don't think five years from now i'll be amazed if you're in six weeks yeah you know i mean i took it up in the 70s there was no weight categories there was no no protective clothing i mean you're a gum shield and that was usually just if someone knocked your teeth out he kept your teeth in one place you know um you were fighting and it was full on you know there was and there was no sort of uh there was no sort of um messing around people were very serious you know if you didn't if you did because a lot of the people who taught me were doormen that their their income was door work so they were bringing a practicator you've got this japanese martial art and it's beautiful thing karate right it really is um but it also they were bringing a reality like so we're punching thin air and then and then this one of your instructors to go however how about this how about that what about someone sticks a nut on you what about now one sticks an elbow in where you get caught with a knee and there was always an uh an edge to it i mean i taught train with a guy called billy higgins who's just got an mbe i believe he's 80 in a cut this weekend and uh from manchester world karate champion in 95 one of the most unbelievable men i've ever met he walked into a dojo it could be 50 people 100 people there's just silence his charisma his aura and that guy would push you to your absolute physical limit every time you trained and because he inspired you so much you would just push on you would push on i remember i got my nose broke uh and i'd any someone said like do you want to go to the hospital and i was like no i need to let's put it back right you're right i remember got one of my teeth knocked out and his first question was who did it was did you go down first question did you go down and i went yeah i took the knee and he was like disappointed he had disappointed stayed with me my whole life that did i was about 16 i thought the only way i'm going down now is you have to knock me out so you hit me and drop me fair play i'll get up you hit me a back kick and solar plexus of course i'm going to drop to the floor, but I'll get up.

15:16And those people had a huge impact. And take that mental attitude, take that grit. And I just thought, I just walked into the Met. And suddenly you're on the street, single patrol, on your own, walking around at three o 'clock in the morning, Notting Hill or wherever. You know, you're on your jack. So you better have your wits about you. And all that stuff transferred so easy. Transferable skills people talk about. Well, a fighting art, it makes me think anyone who joins the police should be doing some system where they can defend themselves really defend themselves that should be the first sort of protocol when you're doing some training you should be learning MMA, boxing, self defence I look at the coppers now with no disrespect the majority are all fucking fat they're all kind of unhealthy because even if you're chasing someone even if you I've been chased a few times back in the day and I remember a big gang muscles and he was fit but he used to just batter me and just throw me over his shoulder to hold me down okay I've got respect for you because you're winning here I don't think the majority know how because there's no point in chasing someone catching them and then don't know what to do because the majority of people run they've either got a blade they've either got a gun or they've got they're willing to do what they can to get away so it can be scary do you think you would have done what you'd done with the martial arts if your dad was still around?

16:35No I don't I don't think I'd ever enjoy the you know things happen for a reason my dad walked out um and my mom suddenly found us in a very difficult position there was the 60s you know early 70s sorry and you know there wasn't a lot of welfare state running to help my mom you know she was on a jack uh we got a council house um but suddenly you know living in a very rough area very hostile area and my brother who's a couple years older than me he's like he's visionary right and he thought right you and i we need to start doing something and he got me into karate if i hadn't if i we if we hadn't lost the house i'd have gone to boy scouts and i'd have done this and i'd you know i'm probably never tapped into a side of me that was there i just didn't know it was there were you bullied at school i think it was the 70s i said this in the book i think everyone was bullied in the 70s it was like to you know if you're poor right you're going the school in rubbish clothes and second-hand shoes and you know there's some teachers who might have a bit of sympathy but ultimately you're just one of those kids who falls through the crack you're not cool you know you're not you know you've got nothing going on and so yeah because there's lots of bullying in the 70s a catholic school is a tough environment but also the estate i mean the estate no offense but our next door neighbor my best mate uh turned out a lad from marco who came from scotland came from glasgow and they'd moved out his dad was moving down and run a shop.

18:00And Marco was great. We took up Craig John Karate, became friends for life. But his brother was a skinhead, and he hated, remember in the 70s, skinheads. He hated leaving Scotland, and he hated England more than anyone has ever hated England in their life. And I remember he just literally saw me. I was the embodiment of England. And that bloke made my life a hell, right living hell if he saw me in his dr martin's cherry red dr martin's rolled up jeans heads like shaved to the like to the skull you know to the bow and i'd be like here we go and marco could never stop him but you know what i mean we i can say we never became friends but it do you know what i learned about what it feels like to have adrenaline go through your body and be switched on and be aware of your surroundings because you did not want this guy catching you on a way so it was um it was a bit like kato in the old um caluso films i never knew when he was going to attack me so um yeah it was it was tough but if i hadn't if we hadn't lost what we'd lost i'd never stepped a foot in the dojo i would have no doubt about it yeah it's mad that that's why i asked the question that if you're the great man jeff thompson yeah unbelievable i he's an eighth or ninth man he was abused as a kid he trained himself to be a killer he wanted to kill he wanted to be a bad man he became the bouncer and done a lot of damage but then something twit something kind of switched in him i think he's seen his abuser he called it the parasite he spoke about it just kept getting bigger and bigger and bigger because of what he never spoke about what happened to him as a kid by his instructor.

19:45And I think he met him in a cafe. And he says, because he always had that thought of killing him. But when he's seen him, he froze. Bear in mind, he's a train killer at this time. He's unbelievable what he does. And he froze. He realized that he had his power. So he wanted his power back. So he went up and approached him and asked him. And he realized how much a weak coward he was. Never done anything. And from that day, took his power back. And then he just went on and done. unbelievable things like he was it's unbelievable what a man he is yeah i know jeff thompson yeah i've i've followed his career he was around we're around in the same era when he's wrote some great books he watched it the uh the pavement arena which was like one of the first books i can remember where people actually talked about the street being a you know you know fighting on the street is a world different than fighting in a dojo because up until then i think a lot of people thought you know it just transferred you know what he did in the dojo but it doesn't you know people fight dirty surprise attack weapons you know simple things can catch you out i've said this stuff and the police like you fight you're struggling with somebody a curb suddenly one of you stumbles on that curb or use it to your advantage if someone's they're getting on top pushing them back and they topple over they're using the curb to your advantage using vehicles for cover it suddenly produces knife get a car between you all this practical application that, you know, that doesn't occur to people standing in a white karate seat punching in air, but it does occur to some.

21:10And Jeff Thompson used to have a session, I think it was once a month or whatever, like, and it was a reality pressure testing, he called it, where they'd go in the dojo and it was full on, and it was just, people would turn up and it was pretty much no holds barred, and they found out what worked. Because, you know, it's like in the police, you can learn all this, you know, this hold and that hold. That's great when they're being passive. Try doing it on a 14 stone drunk on a Friday night, who's not even fighting, who just doesn't want to play the game. A lot of stuff doesn't work. So, you know, doing any kind of, uh, having any kind of background in understanding how the body works, and that usually means you gotta hurt them a bit first, doesn't it?

21:47But if it's a little bit of pain or stun them or something, do something so they then can comply. So you get a little bit of control over them. But, yeah, but these are the things you should, a lot of people don't understand. But if you have any kind of fighting system... Kelly Clarkson here with Wayfair. I know holiday magic starts at home, and Wayfair makes it easy. They have everything from Christmas trees and mantle decor to outdoor lighting and inflatables that I'll use year after year. Head to Wayfair.com today. Wayfair, every style, every home. FX's American Horror Story returns for an unrivaled 13th installment.

22:22With the iconic horrors you love to fear and an all-star cast reprising fan-favorite roles. Light your candles, draw your pentagrams, and prepare for a supreme surprise. FX's American Horror Story 13. Now streaming on Hulu. A good, a realistic fighting system. Then you start grasping how the body works, the mechanics of it. Yeah. Jed Thompson was good. Yeah, it gives you the upper hand. It does. Like you say, in a street fight, you don't know who's around you. It's hard to understand your surroundings, but to have that extra edge, it's important, but I've seen boxers, I've seen UFC fighters get knocked out by just average men, downsters, everybody's got a fighting chance with one punch, everybody's got that crazy, not everybody, but some people have got that crazy power where they don't have to, they don't even do training, but.

23:16Well, you introduce drugs, alcohol, some POs, the wrong night, the wrong person on the wrong night, some, you know, hysteria, they're fighting for their life, whatever their thing is, but yeah anybody can be a handful i mean often you you know often you'll see on them tiktok you know all these geniuses on tiktok will take a little snapshot of a job and they'll see like seven or eight coppers struggling with someone on the ground and there's always that voice to go of them that's because eight coppers are not battering that guy they don't want to batter that guy but one takes a leg one takes the other leg one gets an arm the other one one's controlling the head so they can't bite you know there's plenty of coppers you can turn up and just bang people out if they you know but that's not the job is it you know cobbers turn up and they're trying to use reasonable force so yeah it might take six or seven people to put that idiot in a van safely so when he gets transported to custody he's not black and blue so cobbers are trying to do it all the right way with everyone holding the camera it's incredibly difficult and all the time that person's trying to bite you spit you you know doing all sorts of crazy stuff so of course it takes numbers but but like i say the more training you have i mean even like when i joined at hendon in 91 we did boxing wrestling bit of judo um god knows how many gym sessions and all sorts of stuff you left there fierce yeah fierce you could possibly be and you had some understanding they even made everyone get in the ring and box you had to get in the ring and box and those days are long gone they are long gone but how can you be a police officer and and not really thinking one day someone is going to chin you someone's going to catch you i don't care where it is it might be domestic doing a vehicle stop when you get a cheeky dig you know it's going to happen um and you're naive you're foolish if you don't have some sort of mental sort of in your mind preparation right it's coming so what am i going to do about that so do some training think about it.

25:19I used to think about scenarios all the time. Debrief scenarios where something had gone wrong, sometimes they've even been phoned really well. What could I have done better on that call? What was my position? And how did he, you know, just be on top of things, be an expert, be good. So when you do turn up, you're in charge, not them. But that was just my mindset. How long did Titi get a black belt? Five years? It took me just over, let's say about three and a half. That's fast. it was but like i say i had something this guy billy higgins was an incredible instructor um you there every day then i was training probably by the i got onto an england squad an all-starles england squad run by a guy called tiki donovan who's quite famous in the martial arts and billy higgins they ran an all-starle squad and i got that brown belt uh and really gave me an insight into how much i love competition and and that just egged me up with that getting there brown but I was just training probably four or five times a week.

26:17But on top of that, I'd be running. I was running. I'd run everywhere. Absolutely everywhere. So I'd run Christmas Day. I had that, I think I read years later that Mike Tyson had this thing. Christmas Day, he'd run. He'd run, everyone else is running at four. He'd run at three. Anything to give you the edge. So I'm not a big guy, so there's no weight categories. So I thought, right, well, give me an edge. I'll be fitter than everyone in the room. I'll be, you know, I'll be the guy training Christmas Day. and if you put that stuff in your little in the back of your head when come the day of the races when you walk on the mat and you're facing an absolute monster you're thinking i bet he hasn't trained as hard as me i bet he hasn't put the hours in and that gives you some something sort of to cling to and it all comes on top but um yeah i was training all the time three and a half years but i say i'd i had some very inspiring people around me that pushed me on yeah it's very three and a half years is great man you're not average about between four and six years well well Probably about four years in Shotokan.

27:15But now, it's been years since I've really been involved in the system. But yeah, I literally lived it. I mean, I was doing maybe doing my A-levels. Didn't do a thing. I literally went to school and they had a really good... I'd go in the gym, do sprints. I never went to a lesson. So surprisingly, when I got my results from my A-levels, they weren't as exciting. They didn't inspire my mother. but um but i just use every opportunity to train to hustle i've called it i saw myself as this uh urban samurai i read everything on japan i could i read everything on the on the sort of the martial mindset about what takes you to the next level what makes you really live it because i really and then because i really bought into it people were calling me up saying would you come and teach at a club would you come and do this would you come and do that suddenly i'm in front of a class from a council house kid who hasn't got a lot i mean i got in started teaching at the buddha choir which is the oldest uh established martial arts club in europe outside of japan 18 nine it was night early 1900 it was set up and i eventually became the chief instructor there and this is a council house kid and i'd walk into the dojo and there'd be guards officers lloyd's uh underwriters because it's in chelsea so it's like pretty fine and these guys wonderful people, military army officers, bomb disposal expert, incredible acts, all sorts of people.

28:41And there's me at the front telling them what to do, shouting, barking near commands, sparring with them all. And I thought, how are these people respecting me? And they respected me because I had something I wanted, something they wanted. I had something, a spark, something that they thought I'm buying into. And they loved my style of teaching. And then when I joined the police, I just adapted some of my police stuff into my karate teaching, saying, look, even if you're not that good at karate, and it kicks off, then be the fittest person and just run away. If you're so fit, you'll get away. Have something.

29:14And I just love teaching. I loved trying to pass on good advice, good technique, and see people develop, build up their confidence, especially kids. When you see kids come in who are really lacking in confidence, I'd see myself 20, 30 years before you know like you know that just like really like lost no sort of center and you suddenly they start getting good at something what did you learn about the samurais i love all those i've read a few books and their background and how they they kind of go through their day-to-day life and everything they do is just about combat it's about the war the art of war it's just they're so precise in their craft well for me i'll tell you what i bought into like it's like the whole yin and yang right that's probably chinese but the whole thing was for me was that you can be a warrior you can fight and do all that stuff but there should be a soft side to you you know so the japanese so they have the tea ceremony which is risk ritual of making tea the japanese samurai used to write poetry so i'm thinking hold on that these are these train killers you know doing their stuff but also they had a softer side and then like the whole thing about like this mental cell like zanshin which is japanese thing which anyone does most of us hate me now for this description but it's a state of like um controlled awareness you're alert but you're calm you're not like so that translated to karate from karate into going on the street you go to the front door you've had a massive domestic you know it's going to kick off door goes in and some lump's staring at you you're calm you're alert you're ready to go but you're not you're not pumped with adrenaline you're in control you've been here before you know you're not going to get killed because you've got good mates with you we're going to win we're going to nick this person but that zanchin that ability of being control in control and that really was important in firearms nothing i was always that guy that said kevin's unflappable doesn't matter what we turn up at how bad it is people look at me and go look at kev he's unflappable nothing him will make my heart rate now sometimes obviously i was faking it sometimes because and you're thinking fuck but keeping it in control and i and i've done that whole japanese thing and i also love the fact there's me in a council house and it was grim reading books every magazine on japan everything about like even there's a japanese judo guy who um i read about and they said when he was at the olympics before he left to fight he uh in the olympic stadium he tidied his room apt like it's pristine everything was folded because because he goes and his attitude was because i'm going i could die i will fight to the death on that mat and i will leave nothing behind that people have to pick up for me or clean up and i thought my god i love that attitude he's he's he's thinking about other people the cleaners he's thinking about you know if something bad happened to him so he's totally prepped completely in control of his private life because he knows i'm going to that stadium and i will fight to the death to win and that's how much i'm committed and i just thought try to keep that's an amazing mindset so i can you imagine people did not get me at home i was so stowed away my uniform my kit my my gi everything i learned to iron i learned on everything.

32:38My mum couldn't believe how good I got ironed. Just, I started decorating the house. My mum, the driveway, I put laid a concrete driveway at the front of the house. Kelly Clarkson here with Wayfair. I know holiday magic starts at home and Wayfair makes it easy. They have everything from Christmas trees and mantle decor to outdoor lighting and inflatables that I'll use year after year. Head to Wayfair.com today. Wayfair, every style, every home. FX's American Horror Story returns for an unrivaled 13th installment. With the iconic horrors you love to fear and an all-star cast reprising fan-favorite roles.

33:16Light your candles, draw your pentagrams, and prepare for a supreme surprise. FX's American Horror Story 13. Now streaming on Hulu. It's just like, I'm going to be so in control. I can't change the rest of the world. I can't make it a fairer place, but I can control my world. And I'm going to make my life, mum's life better. I'm going to try and make my brother and sister. I'll be a good brother and sister, brother. And, and so this, this, that Japanese mindset, though, like I say, I'm probably not explaining it very well, but it had a deep impact on me. And also the senior karate people, like, like, I remember once I was in a cafe in Crystal palace and this uh bill heganson i would have it was some other people were having lunch and this woman came in she was absolutely broke just like clearly living on the street and she was looking at the menu and he just got up went over and i saw him handed a couple of notes five years ago said come a couple of pound notes five by the note and he just paid for a meal never said a word just came back sat down and i thought i noticed it i thought that's that's the code looking after other people, hard man, very brilliant martial artist, but came from a really rough background up in Manchester.

34:34He'd had some hard times and he still had that kindness. You know, this was a bloke, he'd walk in a dojo and he'd scared the shit out of him. But he could see someone who was down on their luck and he could get up, no drama, no sort of virtue signaling, just a kind act. And I thought, I'll be like that. Yeah, the Samurais were very big on honour. Even if they died at battle, it was an honor for them absolutely they believed that yeah and i and i think that drink that's what gave them no fear well i think people always have fear but you know um but i do think on you know on in japanese society that's huge honor your place in the hierarchy uh i don't know if it's still today but when i'm the first japanese karate instructors i met you know they were formidable men, you know, really formidable.

35:25And their presence, how they carried themselves was very impressive. And you could see, like, they had this stoicism. They had, like, a real fire in them. That's why they taught brilliantly. But there was no, you know, it was inspiring to be around them. And if you're around inspiring people, it rubs off. Of course it does. You want to be around unbelievable role models. Like you say, with reading those books, it's made you a better individual it's made you cleaner because your aura and your your cleansiness is next to holiness yeah it's like it's so important like if i go into a car or somebody's house you can tell straight away how they live because it's a big part of how their mind is absolutely in the house is clutter in the mind so you can feel sometimes you can like this is great energy it's got good vibes yourself you've got a good presence interview sometimes i can be drained i'll feel good after this interview but you can tell a big part of someone is how they present themselves as how the house is or how dirty their car is it might sound weird for people but it's just it's a big indicators on who that individual is and how they see the world i completely agree and you know that my wife will probably hear this and burst out laughing because i use my car to transport the trees that all the trees i chopped down where we live i chopped down a lot of stuff for the wood burners and our car sometimes resembles a tip right but in my defense so you know you know i have to do it carrie but i do agree you know you how you how you live away from the the from the action how you live at home how you behave around people you know don't have this facade like i think there's an expression the irish have is um uh street angel house devil you know on the street you know around people you're lovely right well and then at home you're a monster well i was not i thought what you see with me is the person at home is the same person in uniform so when i deal with people i was always unbelievably fair i don't care how bad they were it's the same things they're gonna do stuff to my mom do stuff to my girls i'll be like hmm okay i just kept my shit together kept my mouth shut and did my job i thought i'm not i'm not letting you get a rise out of me i'm not letting you upset me because i'm above all that i i'm doing my job i'm highly trained i love i love what i do and you you were you you're not you're not gonna break me with your horrible crap that you spout, you know?

37:45And I think if you present yourself in a really professional manner, that rubs off on your colleagues. Not that they needed to rub, I'm working with great people, but on your kids, you know, inspire, you want your kids to lead good life. I mean, isn't that the ultimate thing with your kids? You want them to have a better life than you? Yeah. Well, I want my kids, and I hope, and I think they're having a better life than me. I start off, they had a better starting life, they're educated, they've all got a good heart um uh i married a you know a fantastic woman kerry you know who's got great kids again she just had you know you want to be around good people who do good things and really care about other people and i learned that bizarrely in the in the dojo which is so strange and about just you know thinking there's more you do you know what i learned that you're not the most important person in the world you know your family collective being part of something is more important you know and if you're not selfishness it's a horror it's a really hard thing to work with if you work with people who are very selfish it's no it's never going to be a good environment but if you work with people who buy in to something in the dojo in the police like my team on 19 all you know there was such a camaraderie i'd walk on parade at say six o 'clock in the morning and i'd look at those faces looking back at me and they're smiling they're motivated they're energetic and and they've all got stuff going on problems with a wife problems with a kids had a shocker at work yesterday they're going to get a bollocking but you're looking at people who are professional and really motivated and want to do a good job and that just rubs off on you so i had it in the dojo i had it in the police and all through my police career uh and anyone watching this who's anti-police you are you do not know how lucky you are the police officer in this country unarmed when i joined we had no body armor uh we had no batons no cs no taser you went to work you wore a white shirt epaulettes clip-on tie flares and a pair of dr martin boots right and you walk the streets and you beat your helmet and you know you just learn to deal with the public you learn to use the power of communication you know talk to people be reasonable negotiate right but also having your back pocket the ability to deal with stuff you know um and i just love that you know but i think you know like you've got to be a positive person if you're going to be a copper you've got to bring positivity to it and you and and you are going to see bad shit you're going to see really bad things but if you've got a sense of humor if you've got the ability to think you know what today will be you know today was bad tomorrow will be better keep getting up keep going forward and these are all cliches but they're cliches for a reason you know like it's a tough job being a copper maybe i don't know if it's tougher today than it was then but i'll tell you in 91 when I joined, you know, you really did have to have your wits about you because you didn't have a lot of backup, you were single patrolling, you had very little protective equipment.

40:43So you really learned how to deal with people, how to talk to people. Did you have radios then? We had radios. When did they come in? That must have been the 80s then. Oh no, the radios came probably in the 60s, I guess. That early. Yeah, but you know, like I say, there's us moaning about what we had. Imagine Cobb was in the 40s or whatever the only radio was in the area car so the the car had a transmitter but i don't know what generation so you never had oh no we had radios personal radios so when i was walking around in 91 i had a personal radio but it was a code of honor right you you know say you walk in there some really bad stuff you don't start screaming down the radio how you know you you know you want to you want to be one of a cool heads see over the years if someone said if i said over the radio anyone near my location that was my way of saying can someone get here on the arrow because you don't want to transmit to the person who's given you whatever that you're flapping or you don't want to give them you're worried so you'll be saying get your radio say anyone near goblin road and they go yeah kev two minutes out go can you just join us be cool have a little bit of panache about you have a bit of you know like i'm flapping i ain't going i ain't going away because that's another thing about the police you join the job you put that uniform on you ain't running away you know you turn up and you have to deal right so like i say i'll tell you one of the best compliments i ever had and this is a great story i used to teach karate and there was a guy called caesar andrews who was a rastafarian uh really into the whole raster thing he's a black belt karate and i walked in a into um uh where was it cold harbor well it was somewhere no it wasn't it was somewhere in notting hill and uh culver square and i walked into culver square and there was like three or four rastafarians kicking off and there were some big guys and they're having a bust up about something and i thought right oh dear it's gonna get a bit bent and i walked in and these rastas are looking at me and they kind of turned on me you know white police officer you know start telling i said guys whoa and with that caesar andrews appears from my karate buddy and he goes whoa leave him alone leave him alone and i looked at hey caesar and he's like boom and he's like, do you know what, Kev?

42:49He goes, and they were laughing, go, you know this guy? He goes, he fights like a black man. I'll never forget Caesar Andrews saying that. And they all burst out laughing, right? And, uh, I was laughing and it completely brought the whole thing down and we were all cool. And after that, when we saw each other, it was like funs and we were cool. But, you know, you never know where those old contacts might suddenly step up and save your bacon you know but yeah the ability just um to keep a smile on your face you know it's important how long was the training to get into the police you must have coasted that then being fit it's 20 91 it was 20 weeks at hinden um and it was uh it was intense it was 20 solid weeks all so you're not worried about hosting the whole family for the holidays why would i be wayfair had everything i needed to get the house holiday ready what if mike brings his cheerful dogs.

43:41My tree has tons of five-star reviews telling me how sturdy it is. But what if everyone's plus one brings a plus one? We'll see how extendable this extendable table really is. And extra chairs are on the way. Okay. What if there's a blizzard and everyone has to sleep over? Ready to go with extra bedding and towels. From guest-ready essentials to holiday decor you can trust, Wayfair delivers.

44:05FX's American Horror Story returns for an unrivaled 13th installment. with the iconic horrors you love to fear and an all-star cast reprising fan-favorite roles. Light your candles, draw your pentagrams, and prepare for a supreme surprise. FX's American Horror Story 13. Now streaming on Hulu. You fell in love at first crunch, and now the crispy chicken crunch-wrapped slider is back at Taco Bell. But with a twist, it's crispy all-white meat chicken nuggets inside a slider-sized crunch wrap. But now you can enjoy them with the kick of Hidden Valley Diablo Ranch. Or try the tortilla chip-coated nuggets on their own.

44:51They're waiting for you. The crispy chicken crunch wrap slider, a brand new classic, is back. Only at Taco Bell. If you weren't in the gym doing some sort of physical exercise or in the swimming pool, you're in class learning the law. And you were learning the law inside out. There was no sort, you know, the definition for each offense. There was tests on a Friday. There was a test every two weeks. Then once a month, you had a massive exam and you had to pass those exams. If you did those exams, the worst thing that could happen to you has been back class, where you'd go back five weeks and you join a new class, lose all your mates.

45:26And you'd also, everyone would be looking at you like you're some kind of loser because you've been back class. So the pressure was on, but I must admit, I just flew through Hendon. I wasn't academic, but I wanted it so bad. I love the fist. I mean, imagine you like physical exercise and you're training every day, right? And it's such a laugh because I was fit. So I was knocking out a mile and a half in under nine minutes, say. I could do push-ups to the Kauskas home because in karate, there's nothing they love more than doing push-ups and sit-ups. So all that stuff was a piece of cake. Probably the only thing I couldn't do was swim.

46:00And to this day, I still couldn't swim from here at the door. so swimming was a bit of a problem but um but in the exams i wanted it i studied and i studied uh i still had a great time i was still in the bar every night in the peel bar making friends and sort of telling war stories and uh it was i loved hendon and it prepped me brilliantly for arriving on the street how many laws are there oh god no thousands there's so much that even so do you get like do you get mock tests before how does it work if there's so many laws surely you can't remember no there's a syllabus and you'll learn about theft burglary the big ones theft burglary robbery sexual assaults uh and then vehicle stuff you learn about vehicle drink drive vehicle kind of offenses and then you and you're tested each month on the or each week whatever on those each individual part of the syllabus but at the end it was a big throw everything in the mix exam so you might have a question on a sexual assault then a question on a theft question on a robbery question on a vehicle of thing multiple choice uh i think they were actually yeah multiple guests and uh but we got through it um but it was really challenging it was tough uh but you had the instructors i mean that was another thing like karate or whatever the instructors really wanted to be there they really wanted to help you so you sit in class and i had one instructor who was um he's a scottish guy dog handler and um he was there because he had so many complaints he had to go off the streets they'd send him training and at end of every lesson we'd sit in class and he'd go right that's the book learning done now i'm going to talk to you about a scenario something that happened to me and he wouldn't be swinging the lamp but he'd just talk about something so what would you do what would you do what would you do and he talked us through a scenario goes and he basically said anything can happen if it can go wrong it will expect not do not expect the unexpected no two days are the same and so he practiced most of us i think mentally for when we leave hendon which is this incredible environment we're out in the real world you know and we're going to be on the street in uniform and remember you're a police officer and sometimes you have to think of that look you're like that's me yeah i'm a police officer and people don't care if you've had one day in the job or 20 they're in danger or they need help they're going to run up to you and say officer and you better have it you better have it all your shit screwed sort of tied down so law you learn about law you learn about just so much stuff and then for the next two years you're a probationer there was every few weeks you went back for more training adding more to your knowledge base so you're learning about more offenses more offenses and so you so by the end of two years in your probation you really you know you really have learned a amount of information but obviously you're going out every day and applying it applying you're nicking someone for burglary you're nicking someone for theft or tda or whatever it is drink drive and you're applying the practical application of the law and that's the thing another thing about the law the law the law's amazing right the people who write the laws of the uk whatever right these are bright people right they're paid to sit down you know and it's lovely and it's nuanced and it's really you know men's rear the boys he thinking mind and all this stuff and it's great but the practical application of law you know by police officers well do you know what that's the right that's the sharp that's the sharp end of the spear that's the point of the spear because you know you have law you know you have the caution you have all these things but when you're rolling around at two o 'clock in the morning in the street with someone who's trying and knock your teeth out you know trying to remember you know your definitions you're the reality you know the to apply the law you you've got to have also a bit of force behind it because bad people by definition they don't want to they don't want to play by the rules do they they're not going to conform and so you might your knowledge of law is great and the laws those laws have to be applied but to apply that law you certainly need a bit of spine and a bit of muscle and a bit of something in you because there are people who will not will not play the game and i and that's what i thought i thought the laws be you know democracy we're an amazing democracy in the uk um and and it's a it's a wonderful thing freedom of speech you know the right to sort of whole whole sort of gamut of things you know but the application of the law does require the use of force and police officers have a thing called them such force as is reasonable in the circumstances and and it's just lovely it's reasonable in the circumstances but you know a week later you know three o 'clock whenever you get a bundle and force is used or maybe someone gets hurt you know at the time in that moment that was necessary but six months later at court and he finds out the guy's got this broken or that happened and everyone's like looking at you going was that necessary you had to be there you've got to be there you've got to understand there's got and that's why i to think there's a disconnect between maybe senior officers there's a disconnect with society that you don't understand to apply the law you need brave people who've got the guts to do it in the first place and it's going to get messy because not everyone goes it's a fair cop gov and jumps in the back of a van it's the same as a long castle stuff i've got his back i interviewed long a couple of months ago now and he jumped out his van no excessive force people say it was the kid had no injuries this was a 15 year old kid who assaulted an old man causing fights at McDonald's carrying a lock back with a fucking Stanley blade on it yes he never knew he had a knife but he was a martial arts expert he could have destroyed that kid in a heartbeat they said he had his hands around his throat which he did and it was on his chest he was resisting arrest it took four people to get him eventually resisting arrest for me we need coppers like that for me that's the the heartbeat of the police force people who got the balls to jump out and take risks.

52:00Because that kid's hand slipped. And we know if there's a hand, it can do anything. It could have slit his throat. Slit his artery. It could have died. But with that, unless you've actually lived it firsthand, you shouldn't be judging to make those split decision calls. A kid who's wanted, who's on the run for beating an old man, he jumped out the van, he resisted the arrest. He says normally they try and put them up against the wall so they can't really move. That's normal protocol. But he never And then obviously lost his job Yes he said some swear words But there's got to be some element of respect as well The police demand respect And so they should So yes he said a couple of swear words It's not enough to get sacked in my opinion But for me he's in the right I don't see anything wrong in what he did I would rather him on the street than the kid at 15 So what does it take for the kid at 15 to kill someone For then people to stand up and go Yeah the police should have done more No matter what he wouldn't have won He disarmed the kid Resisted the arrest the kid never even put in a complaint there was no injuries job done for me and it's just went kind of worldwide news lost his job and yeah it's just we're living in a very soft ingeneration you know well do you know um i mean first off is it proportionately loses his job he was a cracking copper i think it was dorset he's got loads of commendations he and he clearly is a working copper he goes out and he's stopping bad people which we all want surely yeah right so he's doing his job and um and he swore i mean for the life of me i can't believe you lose your job for swearing and the very fact that people justify it uh it's just ridiculous you give you know get him in an office square him away have a word of him you know give him a written warning if that's where you but even i don't think that's justified you know what's wrong with swearing if you in trojan in firearms the um the use of verbal domination and that means swearing is an absolute number one tool in our in our armory so you jump out and you're going you are letting them know the firearms officers are pointing guns at them and you're showing me your fucking hands you're dominating them unbelievably aggressively right um anyone watching me thinking oh my god but we're trying to make sure that that guy or girl whatever it's not going to go for a gun it's not going to go for a weapon so we completely shock and awe they are in they're completely scrambled so then we can control them then we can extract them they get cuffed no one gets shot boom right but so so of course what's wrong with swearing and i've watched it he's not hysterical he hasn't lost the plot you know he's in he's having a fight with a guy uh and there's some language but he should never be he should never be sacked for that and and any working police officer any hands in pockets stopping bad people copper watching that will be thinking you gotta be kidding me that could be me imagine you're on the sofa there with your wife and kids and your mortgage and whatever else you debt you got and your credit cards and you're thinking and bearing in mind this thing you know it's a tough job and very the pace just a joke for what we do and you're like fx's american horror story returns for an unrivaled 13th installment with the iconic horrors you love to fear and an all-star cast reprising fan favorite roles light your candles draw your pentagrams and prepare for a supreme surprise fx's american horror story 13 now streaming on hulu you fell in love at first crunch and now the crispy chicken crunch wrap slider is back at taco bell but with a twist it's crispy all-white meat chicken nuggets inside a slider-sized crunch wrap, but now you can enjoy them with the kick of Hidden Valley Diablo Ranch.

55:47Or try the tortilla chip-coated nuggets on their own. They're waiting for you. The Crispy Chicken Crunchwrap Slider, a brand new classic, is back. Only at Taco Bell. Star Wars The Mandalorian and Grogu is now streaming on Disney+. What are you waiting for? Hop on. The must-see galactic adventure comes home on Disney+. This is the way. Our only chance is to work together. I like this kid. Always wear your seatbelt. Star Wars The Mandalorian and Grogu. Now streaming on Disney+. Read PG-13. That's me done. I'm going to go to work. I'm going to report a few crimes. You know, keep out, keep my nose clean, keep out of any kind of conflict.

56:36Do you want a generation of coppers who do not want to get involved in stuff? Of course you don't. You want coppers who go out and stop bad people. Invariably, but like I'm going back to, you know, if you want to, if you want to sort of arrest these people, then invariably, and they kick off, there's going to be force. In the perfect world, you go, stand still, they stand still. Show me your hands, they show your hands. You go, you're under arrest, they go, boom. But it isn't like that. do you think that's damaging towards coppers when they see that and then they probably take a step back thinking i can't afford to lose my livelihood so they ended up i wouldn't say they let people off but they end up using less force less action because they don't want to take the risk in this woke society well they could couldn't they and you know you never you never ever want to go into a scenario into a job go to a deal with an incident and having the back of your mind some little voice going oh but what if what if if you've got that voice you're in the wrong place you've got to be going in there thinking i'm with good people i trust they trust me we're going to go and deal with this person we're going to do our duty if you start hearing little voices thinking oh but what about what about you're in trouble and unfortunately um what happened to that that officer down in dorset i think yeah it was shocking because i've watched it and and i spoke to colleagues retired and still serving and they're like what's the world coming to what what do you want then what do you really want i sometimes feel the public maybe senior officers would would be happier if one of us got a good height it'd be better for for the optics coverage got a good hiding it's better than you know somebody gets roughed up you know and it's not pretty and that's my point i'm making earlier you know dealing with violent people is not pretty it's a bundle it's a bun fight and it's not like the movies i mean you know it's not like watching swat on whatever you know you go in cuff everything slick you know one in the b it's not like that you know people you know anybody if they choose to be can be a handful right and and coppers are doing their best and like you say you know you're in the heat of the moment you're human what about the human factor what about the human factor what's he dealt with what five ten fifteen other causes he dealt with that day did he couple is he in for night duty and he's had two hours sleep because he was late off dealing with a prisoner you know let's have some sort of context to it let's let's start trying to understand and you know what uh i saw on uh nick ferrari they had some senior officer some senior officer sort of nationally deals with complaints and he go and he was just talking waffle just political waffle and he's probably thinking of his next rank and what he's going to go and do about well it was investigated have some spine mate have some spine and say well actually it didn't you know he got either come out and say that officer needed sacking because he was blah blah blah you know or back him sack him or back him right and you see in america all the time really good sort of these sort of uh officers standing up when their officers maybe shot someone or been an incident go my officer did this i support him i've got his back he's protecting the public and you see the public like yeah brilliant that's what we want we want people who are going to go out and protect us right do you really want a load of police officers just riding around in cars like hear no evil see no evil oh god that looks a bit of trouble ignore that ignore that you don't you want coppers who see something get out and deal but it makes it easier for criminals knowing that we live in a woke society and coppers aren't going to do anything anymore well fortunately i think there's still thousands and thousands of coppers you go out of work every day and do it and and i know i was i was like sometimes my mindset was like sod the consequences i'm doing my duty and if you don't like the way that takes us well then then i'll deal with that as well what was your foster arrest called my first ever um i was walking down portobello road on a on a week a saturday night and um a load of guys came out of pub i was on my own it's the summer and i've got my big teary helmet on and i'm just like and they're all pissed and they came over and they just started they just started on me there was no warning they just like one went on my hat off which is an obvious target and one sort of threw a kick and i was like and it's just off you're joking yeah yeah and it was just off and it was very unlikely that it was and it was the nice end of portobello road there's sort of the south end and um within about and it's just it's just the gods you know save me the this van was driving the station van was going past with a couple of very very good coppers on board and they pulled up they put it on the radio another car and next thing half of notting hill arrived in portobello road they all got nicked uh and it was good because it was like everyone was like coming up nice one healy you know because they all got a bit of a you know they've got an arrest out of it we all went in they all got booked in i had my first arrest for assault on bar and public order offenses and then we all went to the canteen we're ordering in tea and people are going so who are you again because i was new on the team right they go well sure yeah your name's healy's it kevin and then you started to learn about people he's he he's the area car driver this is that and and you started to build some sort of camaraderie and they're saying oh he's a good lad he's new but he'll learn he's motivated and and then sure enough they go right tea's over get out and i was back out walking again and and it was it was brilliant it was absolutely brilliant and so if you are joining the police and my god there's some negativity about joining it can be the best job in the world and you will make friends for life because the stuff you deal with the things you see the the the impact on you is so great it just changes your life and it did for me it really did i've got friends now who i would you know i would do a lot for and they know where they are right and you those friendships and i'm sure you get in the military maybe in other professions but i only know about the police but boy oh boy i've met some unbelievable people and i've talked about in the book like i'm going to things and i'm surrounded by people who are just so so switched on so sound i mean i'll tell you a story i was driving around um again early in my service i'm driving around shepherd's bush it's like and there was a nightclub in those days on shepherd's bush really leery nightclub and i was with a guy called magic who hate me even talking about him could be he's a sound bloke and i was a bit of a hero of mine and we just saw something kicking off outside a nightclub and he just screeched up it wasn't even our ground shepherd's bush we jump out and there's this massive guy with loads of blonde hair turns out he's south african and uh it's just he's laying it to people and we ran towards him and next thing i didn't know it but he's got some sort of CS spray from South Africa, so God knows what was in it, right?

1:03:11It's put me in my eyes and in Paul's magic. And next thing we're fighting with, and he had a really big guy with long blonde hair, and I remember getting hold of his hair. Now, this wouldn't look pretty, but I couldn't see. Couldn't see a thing, and also in those days, no one knew about these gases and sprays. I thought, all I know is, I can't see. I could be blind. So I've got all his hair, and I'm dragging him down. I can't see what my colleague's doing. next thing's on the floor and we're having a right old tear up and then i can hear sirens people turn up and they say right off to hospital and uh we got shipped to hospital and no one knew what to do with us because no one had seen our eyes were like this and eventually eventually we we got our side back and i tell you now um we sat there laughing our socks off literally we've been gassed governor turned up great job guys and i don't know you know but if you touch someone or you get this particles on your hand then you and obviously the governor's like well done lads he didn't and he's touched his face next thing he's crying governor's crying we're crying the nurses have got it on in there but what i remember that's memory now 35 years later because we had such a laugh we had a roll around we looked a really violent guy we got injured and we're still in the next day no thought of going you know having a you know going home sick or anything um and just but you know you were working with people you know i couldn't see but i i couldn't see what was going on but i knew my mate was in the thick of it just knew and that where do you get that where do you get that kind of bond where you just absolutely know you someone's got your back you seem to have mastered that and obviously your craft and other martial arts has kind of gave you that strong mindset i remember interviewing peter mackley's sas yeah mindset unbelievable never broken i've interviewed soldiers i've interviewed sas men and they're broken i interviewed him and i was asked him certain questions he says listen that's what i signed up for that was my duty i don't fucking care i would have killed anyone anyone if i was given a a task to do i would have done it a hundred percent yeah and that was it i says do you ever worry about the people you've killed he says no that was my job yeah he believed solely in what he was doing was the right thing love that mindset um including yourself you've got that mindset of you're doing there to do a job and you've done it the best of your ability whether there's tear-ups whatever you seem to have laughed it off now i've interviewed police who are broken no mental health gone suicidal alcoholics drug addicts they can't handle what they've seen they can't handle what they've done you're obviously a stronger mindset because of what you've went through you've seen that stuff as well but you handle it with a pedigree of that is what it is i laugh about it i have a joke but the other side you see how do these people then go down that that route and can't handle the circumstances that they put themselves in well first off you know to all of those kind of people those people who've been harmed and damaged by the job um i'm not stronger than them or better than or and i tell because i've had great mates who've broken and and and are broken by the job and things that have happened uh i never turn my nose up at it i'm just lucky right i am lucky i my tough childhood um and a whole host of things that have happened to me in my life just made me tough and i'll go back to my mom that ability just she just had she had some really bad had a bad life right but she never stopped smiling she never she was always thinking about other people and i was thinking i used to sometimes i was a period where i was um divorced and i was in a section house which is basically a room for a window and a sink and a bed right and i was in say 40 or whatever years of age and this wasn't how i thought life was going to play out for me and i was lying in bed and i used to lie in bed some nights and i'd be thinking it's going to get better i feel shit now this is bad but i'll feel better and i'm thinking i you know i've got great kids my kids kept me on the straight and narrow i can't start drinking because if i start losing it i'm gonna lose my kids so you can't be drinking kev you can't be doing this yeah i'm no i'm not better i'm not stronger i was just lucky i'm one of the lucky ones and don't be wrong i've got my demons boy have i got my demons but you know um i keep them i keep them nicely wrapped away and maybe one day i'll maybe it'll be my turn to you know but i hope not but i never look down my nose at these people because how do you put about how do you put a price on it someone sees a a cot death or a horrible rta or you know how do you and then go and see your kids you know i've seen people die i've seen people all sorts of things happen and the i'm some of the very best people ever worked with and have been deeply affected by their job um so so i have no criticism at all of anyone who who has to walk away or is damaged by it because it's unique it's that's why doctors nurses break because they see he's just seeing bad stuff all the time all the time all the time it's not like you know it's something like the end of the news and they show a story about a puppy didn't they just to make the news light it's not like the end of your tour of duty something fun something nice happens and we all have an ice cream and go well see you tomorrow it ain't quite like that your tour of duty might be might be an absolute roller coaster of bad things one thing after another and there's no there's no decompression and and so i was lucky but i'm not saying the future i'm not break and and for those people who have had crises and and hit some bad times they have my they have my sort of sympathy it's crazy really if that some of your best soldiers some of your best corpus come from the most worst upbringings chris ryan who i've been speaking about recently i interviewed him he was the longest escape and um he became an ses like selection he used to train the kids and he says obviously when you get into the jungle a lot of people fall off but he got to grow that connection with them and he was saying some of them who make it as the ones who go through the toughest duck tank is in their mind they've not got anything else they've got something to prove to themselves they've got some sort of inner demons that that's saying you should something about the devil but you should learn how to dance with the devil they learn how to control that trauma control that pain you've mastered it to a good degree and it's great to laugh it's great to have that dark human i believe that's what gets me for every time there's darkness in my life i'll laugh it off yeah i'll process it but i will laugh it off and i think it's key to laugh because bad shit does happen and i would rather laugh it off than trying to let it slip and let my mind go.

1:09:51Because once you start spiraling, once you start repeating that cycle, I'm not well at all, you just repeat. Yeah, you're going down a rabbit hole. And where do you end up? I mean, what's the choice? What, for me, I had triplets. I've got a disabled son. What, you know, what was the choice for me? I couldn't roll him in the ball because they would have suffered. So that was my motivation. Keep paying the bills. Make sure my kids are safe. Always safe. going to school doing well at school better life than me and that was my sort of my gift to them if they were but it's just give them more yeah it's important family's everything yeah I agree that's what keeps us going I never really learned how to be a dad if I'm honest I had two girls pregnant at the same time I just got out of prison my dad was dying with a kina my uncle got murdered my best friend killed himself I had two girls pregnant at the same time I was a fucking drug addict I was a gambling addict you had the full bag I had a taste of everything the gambling was the worst one that was the hidden addiction that was the one I done every day morning, noon and night the drugs, the drink it was all hand in hand it was all daily I know how to spike up come low balance it out I mastered that I used to go for a few sunbeds wear a couple of nice suits I kind of manipulated I was fine I wasn't I was broken and it took me maybe I reckon 10 years to understand what it's like to be a dad and the role of being a dad and responsibility not being selfish and being there being present because if you're taking drugs you ain't a dad you're a coward you're hiding from your past your kids need you so if you're suffering suffer of course suffer but you can't do it around your kids because they're a reflection of you so for me it's to lead by example and it's to try and show them and give them the opportunities that I didn't have they don't realise it I'm very strict with my daughter she doesn't have sleepovers she still likes to moan about it but she's 15 now I'm starting to think she'll start to realise what I meant by that yes because I interview enough people to realise how dark the world is not everybody's dark but I'm a protective father so you're not doing these certain things and putting yourself in these positions when I'm not around yes it's a little controlling yes it's a little but I would rather be that than take any chances it's my pride and joy it's my kids I would die for them I would kill for them and I'm sure many dads would but that's the essence for me that's what life's about is being a father being a role model being important in your kids life because if you're not I've got kids to different women which makes it harder but it was a stage in my life I never thought I would make it to 30 and sometimes I was glad sometimes that thought process as well because I had so much pain still got a lot of shit to work on I've still got a lot of shit to process but life is still beautiful you know and we still make mistakes and I speak to enough people to realise none of us are perfect we all make mistakes but for me the true essence of life is having family the true essence of life is trying to be a better individual to then teach your kids not to make the same mistakes yeah exactly exactly that's the that's the thing isn't it you know i i've i don't call them sacrifices or it was just a deal isn't it they didn't have to be born so the deal is they're born and my duty now until i they get to whatever age is to make sure they're safe just safe and loved they know they're loved and yeah will clash i'm saying no like you're at sleepovers i'm saying no to whatever but you know what that's your job i never saw myself with my people probably hate this but i never saw my kids as my friend i'm your dad you got friends at school i'm your dad so i'm going to say things you might not like to hear i'm going to be tough occasionally um because my number one job is to make sure you have a great life that you know you're loved that i'm there for you that you can always call me over anything there's nothing we can't talk about ever and they know that and they really do know that and i love that thing but i'm dad i'm not a mate i'm dad and i'm and that's how i worked it but you know like for me yeah it was just family's huge i didn't realize it when i was younger but my mum died recently and it's huge yeah how hard was that for you becoming a dad knowing what your dad done were you scared that that could have been the case or were you just so ingrained in being the dad that your dad wasn't if you know what i mean yeah well do you know what um my kids have i mean i love uh i love a drink i love what copper doesn't love going for a drink right i love going or did love going for a beer but my kids have never seen me drunk ever i feel i'll be lucky if they've even seen me drink a beer because when i was with them they were the priority that i picked them up from their mum whatever i'd pick them up and they were and my number one rule was they go home in one peace they don't have there's no trauma there's no drama they come these with me they have a great time we do whatever we need to do school work times tables read a book go this whatever it was they have a wonderful experience we're growing together they were they were they don't know how much they healed me my kids were so good for me but um yeah but yeah of course in my back of my mind i was thinking you're never going to be like your dad you're never going to be that man you know um and i'm not giving him a hard time he had his stuff going on um but i know this that my mum and my brothers and sisters will love me saying it was a special she was special uh and i was no mummy's boy i drove her crazy right but um i always knew she was special even when i was giving her a load of shit as a teenager i knew she was a bit of just a one-off you know unbreakable just unbreakable and a sense of humor and and a joy of like just always laughing always wanted to be involved um brilliant with my kids when they were born just just an incredible person and yeah if i'm gonna be anything i'm gonna be a tribute to her i'm gonna be like i'm gonna be a good person even though anyone listening who knows me will know that i have seriously fucked up sometimes because we all do don't we you can't help it but if you try if you keep on trying you know I think it's important to hold your hands up to your fuck ups and your misery take ownership with your sin you know because everybody's got them everybody's got mistakes and certainly you can be the best person on the planet just now one incident one breakup one loss they send you over the edge and you can become a totally different person so nobody's immune to pain nobody's immune to being this perfect person because we all suck at times we all fuck up, we all make mistakes, we all say things we regret.

1:16:28And that's the beauty of life, it's just to try and be better than that. Because it's all learnt behaviours as well, how you were raised and it's important. How did you get into then doing all that, going through everything to then SO19? What is that, Special Ops? What is that SO? So 19 is the Met Police. I think they've rebranded it to MO19 or something. They've changed it after a few years. They do, yeah. But basically the 19 is the Met's farms unit, and encompasses the training wing, the carder who trained farms officers for all the different roles of farms officers. But Trojan was what I wanted to join.