Armchair Anonymous: Twins

25:28And then she started throwing parties in the basement. Not ideal. and then the smoking was like one of the house rules like don't smoke in the house so there were a few things working against her but again my mom was just so happy to have someone around to help that she was like we'll figure it out but one night my dad came home really late from a trip he was exiting the taxi and because it was night and because her apartment was street level if the curtains were up you could see everything and so as he was getting out and about to go up our stairs he saw her in the kitchen and was like, oh, she's home.

26:02And then like out of frame into frame, another woman appears and she's identical. Yes, the prestige. It is the prestige. Yes, the prestige. She was living the act. Stop it. And it's Parasite all at once. Yeah. Hiding in the basement. In the basement. Oh my goodness. So yeah, the next morning, my mom confronted her and said, are you two people? Yeah. And yeah, she didn't deny it. It was a great way to get a two for one rent in London and two for one job. But yeah, that was the reason she never knew what was going on because it's two women taking care of us. Oh, one was a smoker. One was not. You think they would if they're going through all this trouble of really coming up with this scheme, which is a good scheme, they would talk and be like, so they're vegetarian.

26:50Right. But that's if you're the type of person that isn't pulling like a fun scam and in your 20s in London throwing parties in a house, you know, you should like they've kind of already demonstrated that's not there. I should do a scam. I know, but that's the paradox. You can't because you want it, but you would be really good at making sure you guys have the same story. How did mom and dad handle this? For me, I might be like, cool, two for one. But they've been lying and tricking and betraying you. You can't. Yeah, I think just the idea of a stranger having taken care of your kids and lived with you for five months.

27:25I think that was enough to say maybe this isn't the right fit. So they told the agency. So I'm not sure what happened. I don't know what their next scheme was. I think they met identical twin boys and they lived happily ever after. I hope that for them. They were very cute girls. Of course they were. You don't get away with this for that long without being cute. I wish you had their info. I do want to ask them if they saw The Prestige. Did you see The Prestige? I did. What year did that come out? Because this was like 96. Six. Oh, it was after that. Oh, wow, not terribly long after. It was like 2007, I think.

27:58Christopher Nolan owes them some money. Maybe even based on that. Yeah. Yeah. That's wild. Ana, that was tasty. You guys had a real-life prestige happening in your house. Slash Parasite. I wish they would have had a little fun with it, like play hide-and-seek with you. Ew. They could have. Who knows? Yeah. And then they pop out from somewhere that would be impossible. Then these people would never trust anyone ever again. Or they would think they had a version of Mary Poppins like she's magic. She could be in any room of the house. Two places at once. Actually, I hope they graduated to more complex crimes with bigger payouts.

28:33I hope so, too. Maybe it'll end up being another story on here. What age did you guys then leave England? We moved to New York when I was in middle school. So 12. Did you happen to listen to Amanda Peet's episode? Yeah, this is kind of her story. She was over there in England and came back to New York. God, you guys are so cool. I know. Did you have an English accent when you came back to New York? I did because I learned how to speak in London, but I got made fun of pretty bad. So I tried to fit in. The most embarrassing thing is that at least in our school, because I went to a British school, when you raise your hand in class, you don't do this.

29:13You do this. Oh, you raise one finger. You put a finger up for the listener. It's not a whole hand. When I first started school in New York, I did that and got made fun of. Yeah, it doesn't look good. It looks uppity. It's almost like in another thing. In another thing I want to say. Yeah. There are a lot of moments like that. Wow. Well, Anna, it's delightful to meet you. For someone who's shy, you did a great job. You must have outgrown your shyness. Sometimes. I'm definitely the least likely of the siblings to have done this. Oh, good for you. Thank you. My sisters listen as well, Leah and my other sister, Sonia.

29:45So they were like hyping me up. Oh, how cute. I'm probably going to go to Bucatini today. Give her a feedback. Yeah. And I'm going to say you did great. All right. Well, have a great rest of your day. Take care in Brooklyn. Now I do think you're a twin. Like Lincoln thought. And now I think it. Ew. Oh, I love it. No. What's the other part of me doing right now? Riding a motorcycle around? No, that guy is like sick. He's looking in windows. Yeah, exactly. Oh, wow. Yeah. While you're doing work. While I make the money, he's out peeping in windows. Yeah. We would probably work out an attic schedule.

30:20It's like you can make a mess of your life in six months increments. And then you got to tag back. What if your twin wasn't an attic? That would be really interesting. It wouldn't be my twin. I'd be like, you're not my twin. I know. And then he's like, I'm your twin, dude. I look exactly like you. No, smoke this cigarette. Okay, now don't you need another one? He's like, no. Yeah, you're not my blood. Then you'd kill him. You killed your twin. Because he wasn't an attic. Bye. Cute shirt, Scott. Oh my God. The cutest sweatshirt around. Yeah. Why'd they say shirt? I'm so embarrassed. It's clearly a sweatshirt.

30:54Scott, I'm sorry. It's okay. I'll let it slide. Where are you, Scott? I am Portland, Oregon. Okay. Portland or Beaverton or Wilson. Downtown Portland up by the zoo. Oh, okay. Great. And how long have you lived there? Since 2011. And where'd you come from? So I came from California by way of Colorado, which we'll get to in the story. Oh, wonderful. All right, Scott, tell us your twin story. So I'm an identical twin. My brother is my identical twin and his name is David. He will feature prominently in this story. So we look very similar, especially when we're younger. People would often confuse us.

31:30Friends and family could tell us apart if we were standing next to each other. If we were on the street or something like that, people would struggle, right? They'd confuse us. If we were in a class and they knew Scott was supposed to be there, it was pretty clear who was who. But, you know, we would routinely confuse people. So Scott, when the people that knew you were looking at you and they could tell, were they observing personality differences or were there a few key subtle physical things they saw? This is a really good point, Dex. Just as a public service announcement on behalf of all twins, regularly people get super excited when they could tell twins apart.

32:01So excited in fact, they want to tell you how they could tell you apart. I know how everyone who tells apart. They'd say my face is fatter. You know, my brother's the sad twin. Oh, always pejoratives. Yeah, rude. Someone always came out negatively. Oh, yeah. I mean, inherently. I was more looking for like, oh, yeah, you have a small scar in your eyebrow. That's not bad. That's cool. Inherently, though. So, like, maybe they didn't say that. Maybe they said, well, David has a thin face. No, just like he has a thin face. And then you heard it. They definitely said fatter face. Okay, that's rude. Well, this is bygone era, I guess.

32:37The service announcement is, I don't need to know how you tell part me and my brother. Keep yourself super happy for you. but always there's something different. This is a good PSA. I like it. That is good. I look at my watch or something else, you know, but that's fine. People found lots of different ways to tell us apart. I think we look very different. We have different personalities, but I have proof that people confuse us often as I'll get to in the story. So as a twin, you know, I have lots of little crazy twin stories and they kind of accumulate over time and it's kind of your norm. I have a couple I wanted to share that kind of show some of the stuff that you deal with as a twin.

33:07So even as adults, we live on different coasts. So I live in Portland, Oregon. My brother, he lives in Winston-Salem, of North Carolina. We still managed to confuse people unintentionally. My brother's a chemistry professor at Wake Forest. Oh, shit. He has lots of students. And one of the students was visiting Portland with her family and they were on a walk in our neighborhood. I was also walking in our neighborhood. Oh, wow. That is sim. That's weird. Yeah. And so she looked at you like, that's my chemistry professor. And her parents were like, no, that's not the person clearly lives here. And their parents convinced her, no, she was crazy.

33:37And then months later, my brother had casually mentioned that he has a twin brother living in Portland. And she was like, I knew it. That's fun for her. Yeah, small world. Life mystery. So we have lots of things like that. Even as adults, we just find out that we, you know, confuse people. But growing up, we were very similar. We had a very shared childhood. We did very similar things. We had the same friends. We were very close to each other's best friends. Then we went to UC Davis in California and we both were majors in chemistry. You know, we lived together. But then we decided that we both want to go to grad school and we're trying to figure out what we're going to do.

34:08And kind of like, all right, we're going to have to like separate at some point. My girlfriend and I, at the time, we were trying to figure out which grad schools we were going to go to. And David was doing his own thing. And we had one school in common, which was the University of Colorado in Boulder. My wife, Rochelle, and I decided we're going to go to Boulder. And then a month later, my brother independently decided like, all right, this is the best school for me. So we ended up going to the same grad school. The programs we were in were different though. His was biochemistry. I was physical chemistry.

34:31So we had different classes. We really didn't overlap much. And we didn't see each other that often because I was looking at my girlfriend. Was that part hard? You had been so inseparable. Did you feel any kind of missing feelings or was it fine because you were in love? Yeah, I think it was like a new experience. We were still physically in the same school. So I knew that he was close by. We could still go do stuff. And so I think it was really comforting to have him by. But we were kind of doing our own things. There was some tension there. It was like, hey, do stuff with me. I was like, oh, we're going to do something.

34:58Did he have a girlfriend or it was just you with the girlfriend? At the time, it was just me. And I got married before he did and then ended up buying a house, getting a dog, like doing all the stuff. And so we really were differentiating. But even then, we'd still manage to get confused because we TA these large Gen Chem classes, right, with hundreds of people. And so I'd be walking on campus and someone would be like, hey, Dave, do you wave and just hope they go away? Or do you have to have the conversation, which is always awkward? This is a version of being famous, Scott. Like you're getting to experience a little bit like they're yelling Dave, which might be your character name from TV.

35:29You're like, I'm not Dave in real life. I'm Scott in real life. And then you're obliged to have a conversation explaining what you're doing there. It's always the same. It's like, oh, we're trying to talk to my brother. Okay. Yeah, I'm a twin. That's crazy. I know. What's your name? Where do you know I'm from? I would tell him you said hi. Yes. God, what if you hated your twin? Your life would be miserable. You'd probably not be at the same school as them, luckily. You know, you would distance yourself. Even as we're trying to separate, like we still have crazy stuff. Like I ended up breaking my wrist playing soccer, my left wrist.

35:59A week later, my brother broke his same left wrist scheme. Oh my God. Scheme. Wow, wow, wow. So then we had matching casts walking around. We're trying to do our own thing, but we're still having the same shared experience.

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38:31Okay, so those are smaller examples, but there's one incident that kind of stood out that I wanted to share today, even though I don't remember all of it. So soon after I moved to Boulder, I wanted to start like a soccer team and they had this co-ed soccer league. You know, I decided to sign me and some friends up. The team was mostly made up of grad students, undergrads. It was kind of like a ragtag group of people. We're all fit, not super competitive. And so we decided to set up a team. Boulder, in general, is a hyper competitive place that permeates all aspects of life. Have you guys been to Boulder?

39:00Do you know what I'm talking about? No, this is shocking. I think of Colorado as being very laid back and smoking weed and rock climbing and snowboarding. But like a lot of outdoor sports, though, right? Yeah. What you find is generally there's people that are world class at anything they're doing. And then there's lots of people trying to keep up. If you spend any time there, it's very clear you figure this out. And so it's a large league has 36 teams in it, which is like a lot for a co-ed soccer league for adult league. And they were broken up into six divisions. Then they used a promotion relegation system, kind of like you'd have in the Premier League.

39:27The structure of it's competitive. Yeah. And then on top of that, they had teenage referees that were generally apathetic and underpaid, right? So you're setting up the situation where there's going to be tension in the system. But it was a COVID leak. So we're like equal men and women on the field. That generally lowers testosterone level a bit. So you think like, this is going to be fine. Yeah, buffers it. Let me take you now to a warm spring Wednesday evening in 2009. The game was at this like large field complex. So lots of games going on. Everyone's rushing to make the 545 game start time.

39:56It's midweek. so it's hard to get players there. So I asked my brother, David, who's not regularly playing on the soccer teams, like, hey, can you help cover? Come play for the team. We need some players. We had worked our way up. So we're like mid-tier in this league. So we're not in the most competitive league, but we're not at the bottom anymore. We've done enough to like get right in the middle of the divisions. So most of the games are pretty chill. However, it was clear once the game started, this was not going to be a chill game. Tensions were already high. Fouls happening, but refs aren't calling things.

40:22They're disinterested in controlling the game. As things happen, people are getting more and more excited. and there was one person in particular, one big dude who was being extra aggressive and he was pushing, fouling, doing stuff that was really ramping everything up. And for the sake of the story, let's call him Beefstick. Okay, great, great, great, great, yeah. Fake name. David was playing defense throughout the game and oftentimes he was interacting with Beefstick, right? They were really going at it and getting into it. And my brother and I are rule followers, right? We follow the rules, Monica.

40:53Yes, I appreciate it. I get so angry when people don't follow the rules, as does my brother. And so in this instance, my brother was going to be the fair police. He's going to be a bit more assertive playing defense. And he committed a strong but not malicious foul. The ref called it, but this did nothing to help with the tensions, right? It didn't de-escalate anything. It escalated, in fact. And I was doing my best to stay out of the drama. And at one point, after he had fouled beef stick, he checked out of the game. He subbed out. And I was still in the field. I was drilling the ball, kind of off balance, trying to get around a player.

41:21All of a sudden, bam, hit a brick wall. I was tackled. I didn't see it coming. And I was laid out on the ground and like the back of my head hit the grass. And at this point, I don't remember much of the story. So it gets a little blurry and I had to fill in details from other people. What I heard is I played another five or 10 minutes. Like there was a commotion. People were angry. Tensions were still very, very high. This did not help. I kept playing. And then I eventually checked out of the game, laid down and was immediately like disoriented and confused. This is 2009. So concussions are not top of mind.

41:54people are not so worried as they are now. It's a skinned knee still. That's right. Luckily, there was someone there who had some medical training who was recognizing symptoms, though it was pretty obvious. I was trying to text my wife to figure out how we were going to meet up. I didn't know how my phone worked. I couldn't understand it. I didn't know what day of the week it was. It was weird for everyone. And people on the team started realizing how serious this injury was, including the other team and our friend Beefstick. Finished the game. Everyone was like frustrated. But, you know, afterwards, you're shaking hands.

42:23You're saying good game to everyone and I didn't. I was still just sitting down, figuring out where I was. And Beefsteak came up to my brother. He's like, sorry, I confused you for your brother out there. Implying that he actually meant to take out my brother. Concuss your brother. The takeaway I have from this is like in life as a twin, normally it's fun. People confuse you. You get a good story out of it. Everyone has a good time. However, if you're playing in an ultra competitive co-ed soccer league in Boulder, Colorado, that is not the case. You do not want to be confused with your brother.

42:53I had to go to the ER, had to get x-rays, a CT scan. Twindom can cause CTE. Yeah, you might pay for the crimes of your brother. Yeah. Right. That's my crazy twin story. How often do you see David now? Just like on holidays? Yeah, on holidays. It's hard, man. We each got two kids. Airfare's not cheap, right? And flying across the country, it's an ordeal. We try to see each other, you know, once a year. Yeah, I don't know why I feel, yeah, I feel sadness more than say my brother and I being separated because I feel like if you have an identical twin, you're so close. It's something different. Have you had telepathy?

43:28Our joke is we have telepathetic powers, which means we don't have any ability. Pathetic. Oh, that's funny. And are you a teacher? I work at Intel. As my brothers say, I sold out. He's fighting a good fight. Well, when there's two of you, one can afford to get a little cage and the other can pass it forward. Oh, well, Scott, lovely meeting you. Please send our love to David. He's a part of the story. Are you actually David? Is that going to be the big review? There was a suggestion to have my fake name be David. But I spent enough of my time trying to get people to get to know my real name. So, you know.

44:03Yeah, yeah, yeah. A couple of shout outs. So I just wanted to say that I look forward to all the new episodes like you, Dax, look forward to F1 Weekend. And Dax, I really appreciate the role model you put out there for men with the parenting, vulnerability, how you carry yourself in the world. It's important to have role models out there. And I really appreciate you put yourself out there. Thank you. My wife often references you about things that I could do better and improve on differently. Tell her the grass is always greener. Can I bring her in? Yes, yes, yes. Hi. Hello. What is your name? Oh, and there's little people.

44:35Rochelle. And then this is Avery and Rylan back here. Oh, my God. Hi, guys. They're so cute. My daughter and I listen to Armchair Anonymous all the time in the car on the way to kids' activities. We love it. Oh, thank you. I think she can listen to this one. All right. Well, our love to everyone there. So nice meeting you guys. Yeah, nice to meet you, too. Okay, take care. Pair of twins is like pair of jeans. It's like you shouldn't say that. Is that what we say? Pair of twins. Yeah, I said it. It just came out. You can't say a set of twins because a set is three. You can't say anything. You can't say anything these days.

45:17We had another thing you can't say these days. Hello. Is this Amy? This is. Has there been an avalanche of pillows? It's a beach blanket. I'm in a closet. Oh, okay. With a blanket. You really doubled up. In a very soft chair. Is that a soft chair? Yeah, it is a very soft chair. And what's your shirt say? I'm very nosy. Black label. That's a coffee, right? It's a skateboard company. Oh. Oh, it's related to my story. Oh, that's a great name for a skateboard company. Yeah, so you feel a little... But there is Black Label Beer. I know, but you should know skateboarding. I should, I should. But in my defense, I stopped skateboarding in probably 92.

45:56I mean, they were big in the 90s. Oh, fuck. Oh, my God. What if it turned out I never skateboarded? We found that out. It was all revealed. It was your twin. Okay, Amy, where are you? I'm in Benton Harbor, Michigan. Get out of here. Okay, so Amy, you have a twin story? I do have a twin story. Well, quick twin fun fact is that me and my sister were born on April Fool's Day. And my parents did not know they were having twins until seven days before we were born. Oh, wow. Real April Fool's. Real April Fool's. We had the same heartbeat the whole pregnancy. And then at the very end, we moved and then they heard two.

46:33I mean, this was 40 something years ago. So like technology wasn't there yet. Wow. Anyway, so this story takes place in Indiana. My sister does not want me to tell you the town or the college that it happened at. But her name's Amber, by the way. So it was about 2003-ish. She was like in her senior year of college and she was going to be married and moving out to California. She lives in San Diego. Can I ask if you're identical or fraternal or is that part of the story? We are identical. And I did send pictures of us. Oh, my God. Yes. Oh, you guys are so cute. Let me see. I want a twin. in oh tie-dye phase coming very identical you nailed the stereotype okay i had broken my foot dropping in like i was learning how to skateboard at that time so i was dropping in rolled my foot i just moved to the college town that she lived in because she was gonna leave the state after graduation so like i moved down there i was just working at this local hardware store and i was learning how to skateboard, broke my foot.

47:34I like walked around on it for a solid two days because I'm poor. I don't have insurance because I just started this job. And at some point I'm like, I got to go get this checked out, but how am I going to pay for it? And then my sister was like, well, just take my school IDs to the student center. Yes. And I'll be free. And everybody's like, yeah, that's like such a great idea. Let's do this. Nobody thought that this would be a bad idea. I'm signing off on it right now. I think it sounds great. Why pay for it if we don't have to? And then also because it's Indiana, the two days before I was skateboarding, the two days later, I was brushing snow off of my car to go to the doctor's office.

48:12So, well, the student center. So I'm oblivious to this being a bad idea until I walk in to the student center. And my sister's a senior at this point. So she's lived on campus for four years. She knows everybody. As soon as I walk in, it's like, hey, Amber. Hey, Amber. What did you do? I don't know if she has known these people for five minutes. I don't know if they're her neighbors. I have no idea who they are. So I go up to the desk. The person at the desk is like, oh, my God, Amber, what did you do? And I'm like, I broke my foot. This is really fun to think about. You're moving through the world and you're like a fraud.

48:43Yeah. You're playing a character. Yep. It's exactly that. You're in a really big scheme. And everyone that's coming up to you is going to induce panic. Yeah. And then you start thinking, how would my sister act right now? This is a lot of stress. Yeah. It's like Twilight Zone-y. It was like immediate stress. So I get through the front desk. I'm like, I've made it. That's got to be the hardest part. I get into the room and they're like checking out my foot and like my heart is racing. And they're like, Amber, how are you doing with your thyroid medication? Are you keeping up on your thyroid medication?

49:15I'm like, uh, I don't actually know what milligram of that medication I'm on. I have no idea what it's called. I have no idea. And they're like, who's your primary care doctor? I'm like, I just switched doctors. I'm not sure what their name is. Were you also thinking, oh, shit, I should be on thyroid medication. My identical twin needs it. No, actually, our health journeys are so opposite. That's a whole nother story. I even did a DNA test to make sure we were identical twins because we're so different. But spoiler alert, we are. So they're like, well, you should really get that checked out. That's concerning.

49:45Your heart should not be racing like this. Well, of course, obviously, I'm lying my ass off. So I did make it through that. But then from there, I have to go to a specialist. I'm having to do it all over. Fill out the forms. They say Amber's name on it. I have to go to several different doctors and pretend that I'm Amber and listen for the name Amber. And it's like, all right, Amber, you're ready. And I'm like looking for Amber. And I'm like, oh, yeah, that's me. Real life parent trap. Yeah. Yeah. Or body switch comedy too. It takes two parent trap. So then I get through that. But then work is requiring me to have like all these doctor's notes for missed things that they all say my sister's name on it.

50:24So then I'm like altering doctor's notes to say my own name because I'm like, this is Amber. This is not say Amy. But also, again, 20 something years ago, they're like, eh, my prescriptions all had my sister's name on it. All my follow ups. But I mean, at the end of the day, I did not receive a single bill. Oh, wow. Yeah. 10 out of 10. Do not recommend. It was very short lived the stress, but it was very, very stressful. You didn't have surgery or anything. Would they throw in a cast at some point? I was on crutches for about 12 weeks. So there was like physical therapy. And once I was off of campus, they had no idea who I was.

51:01And then my sister has this broken foot on her permanent health record. But I redeemed myself because I started skateboarding again last summer and I broke that same foot. Time to go to Amber's town. Do you guys live close? No, she lives in San Diego. Is that hard? It's very hard. Yeah, we talk like 500 times a day. We probably see each other like once a year. And she has texted me like 50 ,000 times. She's like, I've never been so jealous in my life. She's like, I want to be on Armchair Anonymous. I'm like, wow. That's the only crazy twin story we have, though. That's great. Well, this is nosy.

51:41So she went to college and you didn't. How do you explain that? I always tell people that I feel like we were raised by like two different sets of parents because we could not be any more different. Our voices are exactly the same and our mannerisms are exactly the same, but our personalities are very different. Like I was like really stressed out about this. I'm like, oh my God, I'm going to puke. And she's like, no, just be excited, you know? But like our health journeys are different. Dax has an idea that twins live the exact same life. I mean - You really do. I want that to be the case, of course.

52:11It's more exciting. I just think it's fascinating how much nurture gets in there, yeah. I say nature versus nurture all the time because our real dad did not raise us like he was not in the picture until we were adults. And my sister's personality is identical to his. I'm more like my mom, but I don't think that has anything to do with her being there. But it was like my dad raised her solely and my mom raised me solely. She's very artistic, like she's musical. I can't draw. So opposite. I actually like it as much as it's fun to think you're identical. I'm always a little disappointed that it's so much nature as a parent because you want to have some sense that all this energy you put into it has an impact.

52:53An entire year will go by and like we won't see each other. And then she'll come to my house or I'll come to her house and we'll be in the bedroom getting dressed and we'll have the exact same polar bear underwear on. Oh, wow. We'll have the exact same mascara or little things like that are very random, but so different in every other way. How about your taste in men or women? Well, we both have been married and divorced and married again. And we both only had one kid. So like she has a daughter and I have a son. We both had C-sections. That's very similar. But like she married somebody a lot like my biological dad.

53:24And I married somebody more like my stepdad. Oh, it's all wild. So interesting. Well, Amy, lovely meeting you and give our love to Amber. Sorry she couldn't join in. I will. Shout out to my husband for being so supportive of me being nervous. And then one of my very good friends, LaDonna, is number one arm cherry. So she's like, I would absolutely die if you say my name. Oh, shout out. Yeah. Shout out to everyone. Well, lovely meeting you. Good to meet you. All right. Take care. Oh, Michiganders. I want to get tricked by a twin. I mean, I am by you. Well. As I just figured out. It's a good trick, though.

54:03Really good trick. You won't even finally admit it. I will on my deathbed because you'll be visiting me dying. And then I'll tap you on the shoulder and go, don't worry. Only one of us is dying. One of us is healthy. That is so scary. But you're not sure which one. Ew. The one you went to Michigan with or the one you went to Minnesota with. Do you want to sing a tune or something? We don't have a theme song. Oh. Okay, great. We don't have a thing song for this new show So here I go, go, go We're gonna ask some random questions And with the help of our cherries We'll get some suggestions On the flyer, I'm Dish On the flyer, I'm Dish Enjoy