Holiday Spectacular 2024

27:01Oh, my God. Were you sitting or standing? I was standing, thank God. He had diarrhea is what I remember from the story. Yeah, Justin Timberlake had her explosive diarrhea. No, but he's so sweet. And we were both really, really sick. But he is one of the great all-time pop recording artists, whatever. whatever so um we had like did a very very simple um version of true colors and like right before and we just kept drilling it and drilling it and drilling it and then like right before we were about to go on he was just singing his part to himself and added in like 20 riffs or whatever and i went are you gonna do it like that and he was like no no no no no no no it's fine it's fine it's fine because i was like no no you have you still have access to like so much of your voice that i like do not have right now um but he was very very sweetly like no no no it's gonna be exactly how we did it.

27:51It's going to be fine. Have you guys ever heard my version? I have to cover my face because it'll make everyone uncomfortable. This is like a rule, Monica. Okay. And I see your two colors. And that's why I love you. I'm so long away, so don't be afraid. He's so sad. Go and go. Two colors. A beautiful Oh, I go away. It was so lonely. That was so cute. It's sad. I saw the whole thing because I had a backstage. Exactly. He's very lonely. I had a backstage pass to that one. I saw the whole thing. BTS. I think you got there because of Tambor Lake. Tambor Lake. We were talking about her Tambor. I think that's how you got there.

28:39Oh, my God. Wow. You searched Tambor, I think. Wow. Best Tambor. I love that. Oh, that was fantastic. Right before this, Gabe was mentioning the Emily burger sauce, and you said you had one more thing. Oh, I do have another gift, if that's okay. No, there's a one gift limit here. This day has been field. I'll take that from the top. Great, please do. Everyone reset. Back to one. Keep it rolling, Rob. Don't cut. Am I stand, sit? It doesn't matter. It'll come out the same. Standing is the opposite of sitting. Sitting. mean uh yeah i do have another gift actually for you guys if if you don't mind i um it goes like this the day has been filled with holiday cheer but i know that it can't last so before we run along i wrote a little song about the king of this podcast oh wow oh wabi-wabs the reason i I signed up for this pod.

29:38Sure, the hosts are fine, but I'd wait in line for that audio god. Monica is chic as hell. Her fact checks make it clearer. But without the work of Wobby Wob, you couldn't even hear her. Dax is wise, the kind of guy you'd hang out with gladly. But he's nothing in comparison to that decibel daddy. Just Monica and Dax, I'd say no thanks. I'll pass. Just Kristen and Anna. I would have made other plan-a. Because Wobby Wob's the reason I'm here. The rest is Bob Kiss. Wobby Wob's the reason I'm here. Feel free to cut this. Wobby Wob's the reason I'm here. Wow. It's about goddamn time, Rob. That is the gift.

30:32I ride him like a rented mule, so he deserved that. You wanna poke your face? He'd rather not. Absolutely not. Oh, that was awesome. I love that. That was incredible. Can I say that was the best? And I was totally going between you and Rob's face and you'd never know something weird was happening. I mean, I'm sure if you know him well, there's micro expressions you could read, but I was like, is he, does he, is he listening to what's going on? This is crazy. Can he hear? That's a plot twist.

31:07Gabe, do you have a favorite Christmas present you remember from your childhood in Michigan on Big Beaver Road, exit 69 in Rochester? The first thing in Michigan on Big Beaver Road, exit 69 Rochester that comes to my mind is getting my first brick cell phone at the time that I was texting. I had a crush at the time. And so it was the kind of texting you did where you had to do the ABC. T9 text input. C9, she knows. AAB, that kind of thing. So it was a lot of that. Cell phone. What grade? I think it was sixth grade that I got my first phone. And you had a big old crush in sixth grade. Early developer.

31:46Crushing sixth grade. The timbre was coming in nicely. What's up, showdy? How are you? G2G. And I imagine then, too, you had some limited data on your hands. Oh, yeah. Oh, for sure. Crushes. There was no, yeah, it was very limited. Yeah, you got to be real efficient with that. A lot of texts to the same number showing up on the bill at the end. Jacob, do you have a favorite gift you got? Yeah. I can recall a nice dino GT bicycle waiting out front one Christmas morning. You son of a bitch. Red, white, and blue. Wed, white, and blue. Wed, white, and blue. Wouldn't it make you so long way? Yeah, dude.

32:25I was cruising all over the neighborhood on that thing, man. It was great. You had a fucking dino. You remember dino GTs? Yeah, you're a dick. I had a fucking mongoose, bitch. I was going to say, kids either had dinos or mongooses. No, kids had mongooses and they wanted dinos. Cool, yeah. What did your old man do for a... Nah, he sold insurance. Oh, I bet he did quite well. He had one client, I don't know. I don't think he did well, to be honest with you. He was always on the phone with Muriel Jacobs. I don't know who the hell that was. Shout out Muriel Jacobs. It's like Bill Gates' pseudonym.

32:56Do you have one? Maybe an Easy Bake Oven? Yeah. Yeah, that's a real dream. Because I also, you know, love a little baking moment, but I also love slightly under-baked baked goods. And the Easy Bake Oven really delivers on that. Oh, yeah. It barely gets there. It's a light bulb, right? That cooks the food? So you get, like, warm cookie dough, which is really what I wanted in the first place. Yeah. That's right. Do you like giving gifts? I'm bad at, like, birthdays and Christmas, because when I, like, know of something that I really want to get someone, I'm too excited and I'm like, I just give it when I can't do the delayed gratification.

33:35I'm bad at birthdays and Christmas as if there's a bunch of other gift opportunities. You're just straight across the board bad at gifts. If you're bad at birthdays and Christmas. Pretty bad. But every now and then there's a fucking winner and I cannot go like, well, Christmas is in two months and I'll just save it. I can't do it. It's happening now. You think of somebody, you get it and then you give it. Yeah. Yeah, that's lovely. I feel like you're like that. And I don't want anyone to think I'm being rude, not asking you, but we both know. I won't remember. You have no clue. We have been on vacations to places that she's like, I'd like to go to Colorado once.

34:07We've been a couple times. You know, that kind of thing. Not me, man. I'd like to throw in in the mix. Please. That we got you. A chandelier. Oh. From Paris. Now that I remember. We track on down. We shot the season finale, the series finale of The Good Place in Greece and in Paris. And when I was in Paris, I went to the flea market there. And I was looking around and I loved it so much. And I saw this white terracotta chandelier that's kind of like, it's huge. And it's like, there's all these little like white terracotta birds all over it. But it's very, it's kind of minimalist. It's very chic.

34:46Just trust me. And I said, how much is that? And he said, and I was like, okay. thanks so much it was way too expensive and then I left but I came home talking about it and I was like oh Monica I gotta talk to you about decor I saw this chandelier and I loved it so much and then 10 months go by I mean like a very very long time maybe even a year over and Monica had the realization that she could track down someone I was who lived in Paris that I had known who could go back and see if it was still there you guys are both in love with? Laurent? No that's not a bit there is a great masseuse in Paris.

35:22It will. I mean, half of it is just like hair play, but it is out of this world. Oh, and there's a dinner involved and you go to his apartment. No, we went to dinner. That's not normally on the docket. It's not one of the services he offers. But then Monica tracked down this chandelier from our beautiful friend Tibor and they gave it to me for my 40th birthday and now it hangs above my bathtub. You have to go live. It's so beautiful. I'm gonna. They're really special. What's your favorite gift you've ever received on Christmas? By far. And I just shout out to Laura LeBeau because we were broke as hell.

35:56But she went hard on Christmas. We had great fucking Christmas. She would go in debt and she always gave us a good one. And I must have been five because we lived in this shithole. And I came out and there was a plastic Indy car like the size of this table. It was probably like would be a Power Wheels now. I don't know if that was the brand back then. But it was a little car I could drive. And I drove it until the battery's dead. Then I charged it. Then I drove it. And then I drove it. And the embarrassing part is I drove it way too long. Then we moved into a neighborhood. And I was driving it at like 11 sometimes.

36:31I'd get nostalgic. And I would drive it down my neighborhood street. And I would be super embarrassed. But I still would do it. The steering wheel broke. And I steered it with pliers for a while. This wasn't the Firefox, was it? No. That was my worst present because my grandpa, Papa Bob, he bought my brother and I these Firefox remote control cars. We wanted them so bad. And then my uncle and my brother played with them before Christmas for so long that they were broken. And then put them in the boxes and we unwrapped them and they were broken. And then they were sold out of Firefox. Oh, no. And then this is my chandelier.

37:10What's the sled's name? Rosebud. Rosebud. This was my rosebud. And Kristen found a Firefox on eBay or somewhere and got it for me for Christmas. And she healed that wound. And it broke within 10 minutes of driving. So I can't even blame my uncles. These are pieces of shit, these firewoods. Yeah. They're like easy bake ovens, essentially. Yeah, yeah. They were the easy bake oven of the RC car world, for sure. Okay, what other songs do we have? This one's a song that everyone's going to know. but Gabe and I like this particular version which is Mel Torme and Judy Garland which we're going to do it with them in mind because it's very clear during this recording that they are sauced okay they're a little tipsy yeah there's some word mangling there's just mostly on the Judy part mostly on the Judy part Judy was pretty gassed she had a hard life she really did Did she?

38:08Yeah. What was her stroke? Well, we Britney Speared her. She's the first Britney Spears. Okay. So, yeah. So we have this little one prepared in the... Rob, cue all the crickets. Oh, my God. Are there crickets in here? So fucking many. I told you this. Someone was having a very emotional moment on the couch, and the second they were having this emotional moment, the crickets started... How'd you do that? If you hit them, they'll come. They're in the garage. You know what we need to get? Nice. A snake. Good idea. Well, let's have a snake in here. We're just wandering around the podcast. We're definitely not going to call this snake in an attic.

38:45Well, what if we brought... I got an even better idea. Do you not know what Monica's number one fear in life is? Yeah, snakes. Upper butt. Me too. Upper butt? A snake coming out of your... Toilet pole? Yeah, they come out and they go all the way up into your... They? Then they come out your butt. No. No, no. Come out your butt. Do you know... Have you fact checked this? Yeah, it's a real rumor. what if Erica brought Norbert over their lizard although he last time I heard he wasn't eating for a while and she was very nervous yeah he's upset about the election he's on strike he's on strike okay so this is Garland Smashed and this is Mel Torme trying to keep it together yeah

39:32all through the years we've waited that's a great Mel Torme waited through spring and fall, though this one's gonna know it, yeah, to hear silver bells ringing and wintertime singing the happiest season of all. And I wish that Judy Garland would start singing right now.

39:58Chestnuts roasting on an open fire. Jack Frost nipping at your nose Yuletide carols being sung by a choir And folks dressed up from head to toe Everybody knows a turkey and some mistletoe Help to make the season bright Tiny tots with their eyes all aglow Will find it hard to sleep tonight They know that Santa's on his way He's loaded lots of gifts and toys up on his sleigh And every mother's child is gonna spy To see if rainbows really know how to fly And so I'm offering this simple phrase to kids from one to ninety-two.

41:37Although it's been said many times, many ways Merry Christmas to you Should we have a go at them, some Old English? Sure Love and joy come to you And to all your loved ones too And God bless you and send you a happy new year And God send you a happy new year Oh, mama! Wow! We can take that on the road. We do a great Meltor man. Thank you, thank you. You guys just need three, four more songs and you got a show.

42:34Stay tuned for more Armchair Expert, if you dare.

42:47Rainbows really know how to fly. So good. Not to it at all. It just, that's what she wanted to sing. It came out of her mouth. No one's going to argue with it. It's Judy Garland. Wait, that didn't really happen. Yes. Yeah, yeah. We just did the track. Yeah. She said rainbows really know how to fly. Wait, did she do the gifts and toys? Yes. Did he say that's close? He said that's close. That's hilarious. Then I looked and it was like, Kristen had crossed out the right lyrics to do. And I was like, oh, that wasn't an accident. No, no. That was close. That was hilarious. She was lost. Oh, man. That gets you out of the copyright issue.

43:20Just throw rainbows in. It's great. And for those who don't know, it's titled The Christmas Song. But that is really, that's an incredible version. That's my favorite version. And I really wanted to try it with you. And they kept it, too. They were like, she said, They're like, Mike, she said rainbows, right? Yeah, just keep it. Okay. Well, I think that. Well, rainbows over the rainbow. Of course. Yeah. I thought maybe the rainbows is her being like, get it. Yeah. Yes, it was. And I think that was live because I think Mel was playing. Yeah, there's a video online that you can see of him playing.

43:47Really? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, because a lot of those songs from way back when, they were just taken from live performances. They weren't doing them in the studio. Right. They were like, you can hear the live tracks on. Oh. Yeah. Oh, man, that was funny. That was delish. Do we want to do our culinary surprise? I just want to say that we were talking yesterday in a fact check, and I was lamenting about how bad I am at giving gifts. And then Monica said, we'll think of secret turkey so fun because you have to make it. And then I thought, okay, that's what I'm going to do. Oh, great. So we'll all go outside.

44:21There's a buffet set up. What? And we'll make a plate, and then we can eat open presents. Okay. Sounds lovely. Wow. A buffet. People can pee if they need to. Wow. On my word of the day today, it was bah humbug. No. And I learned the full meaning. In the 17th century, 18th century, somewhere on the cusp, bah essentially meant not. Right? It was a sign of disagreement. and humbug meant a hoax or a befooling trick. So if you didn't like the merry season, you'd say not. This is a hoax. Oh, interesting. Okay, since you're not needing... I'll open first. I always thought it was two words. It is. Oh, it is.

45:18Oh, okay. Okay, I'm surprised. Now, full disclosure, pleasure i have helped for kristen's christmas i don't want to act like um she has a stylist nicole who has the best taste of any person in the world everything nicole gets kristen wants so three years ago i was like hey nicole since you know what she's gonna want could you help me so i have a lot of help but i still i feel unethical about that so i still get some stuff on my own so if this is a miss it's because nicole had nothing to do with this um and look at this is wicked theme for your now that's where carly comes in i think because i just did the rap job and i I did not affix the ribbon.

45:53I did. Oh. I knew it would be you or her. Oh, the games you two play, I see. Also, shout out to Carly for... Let's see if I can get Dax to lie about wrapping this. And then go, gotcha. It was a total trap. I walked right into it. And then shout out Carly for putting out the buffet outside. Incredible. Did you do the garlic bread too? She made the garlic bread. I made the spaghetti sauce. Both are absolutely delicious. Our listeners have heard a lot about the spaghetti, so I want them to... It's good that they get to see it. Yeah. In action, it's incredible. The word prank is in the title on this book.

46:30Oh. Yeah, there you go. That's right. That's right. That's exactly where it goes. Panda prank with a shoe footprint, like from a murder mystery. Ooh. You're a hiker? I am a hiker. Ooh. Wow. Nice. Ooh, really nice. Oh. These are sleek hiking shoes, buddy. Thank you. Yeah, it's some collab between Panda Prank and Nike. I love them. Those are gorgeous. That's a sexy shoe. Oh, thank you. This is a hit. Oh, thank you. One for one. One for one. Yeah. I should quit. I should just return the rest of your presents, actually. I love them. Why is the box so big? Well, if you loved them so much, you'd be putting them on.

47:12That's what I would do, a pair of shoes I love.

47:18what's what's Panda Prank they're like they do you know one off designs of existing brands is my understanding of it oh cool yeah because now I'm in their algorithm because I bought one pair of shoes so I see every single pair of shoes they design and they're all pretty cool nice Jacob's not eating so I'm going to give him his present I have a present you got a present what the heck also I learned at the buffet bar that you're in Wolfpack which I can't believe I didn't know that that's so embarrassing to me. I'm the newest member. It's totally okay. Oh! Whoops. This looks delicious. Is this wine?

47:56Yes, it is. Thank God. I love wine. I wasn't sure what it was. And then reach on down in that. Reach on down? Reach on down, reach on down the road. Let's go. Ooh. What is this? Do you know I love this wine bar? And I used to live next to it? Wait. I was just guessing. Wait, no. Did you know this or no? I just guessed. No. Someone told you? Who told you? Kristen does her research. I think beeswax. Wow. Whoa. Santa told me. Santa told me. We have three world-class present givers in this room right now. I have to throw. Yeah, this is an amazing gift. Thank you so much. I have to shout out Justine's Wine Bar in Frogtown.

48:33I love Justine's. Oh, she's the best. And I used to live right next to it, and it was too convenient, and I had to move. You had to move. She drove you out of the neighborhood? No, no, no. This is awesome. Thank you so much. I couldn't live within five miles of Emily Berger. Yeah, that's true. I would be dead within six, seven years, I think. Okay, we're going to thank you. It's a huge beaver. Here we go. The biggest beaver you've ever seen. I love beavers. Oh, my God. Tell everyone what happened to yours. Okay. Ooh. Somebody talk to my wife because what happened to mine was, I don't know how it happened.

49:13I was on the phone with my AirPods on, turned my head in some way. I'm dramatic. I don't know what happened. Theatrical. Yeah, I'm a theater kid. You know, you're you're given what you're given. And my one of them flew out and went under the fridge in a way that I spent an embarrassing amount of time trying to fish it out. But the fridge in our apartment is so stuck into the space that it's in that I can't get it out. so I have the case and the other air pod and I can see where the air pod is and I cannot get to it I've used magnets it's brutal it's absolutely brutal so this is huge Anna you're not going to like this but oh no I didn't bring anything I'm not doing your Christmas show you're doing our Christmas show we were interviewing you and oh god what did i say oh god you were talking about going to your audition in your combat boots i know what this is and i said i know what this is yep and it broke my heart that you wouldn't have the best boots a lady can have wait how did you find out my shoes i asked you your shoe size that's right and i thought it was for i thought i i can't believe if I didn't think, well, they asked for my shoe size.

50:37Where are my shoes? I figured we'd be wearing silly elf slippers or something. That would have made the most sense. Oh my goodness. Now, watch how nervous Kristen is because she was a part of me looking online for these. Well, I tried to be. And there were ones I liked where she was like, hon, absolutely not. And then I just waited until she left and then I decided. Okay. I hope they're the absolutely not ones. They were not. They were a compromise, but I still love them. They have fur. They're fur. The boots with the fur. With the fur. There's a platform for you, Shorty. Platform is great. Those are sweet.

51:16Who's talking? I love a platform, too. I'm here for it. I love it. Thank you so much. It's got a side zipper, so you don't have to fuck with the laces. It feels really nice. Thank you. Because in my last episode, we were talking about my audition for my Broadway show when I was 12 and I was wearing combat boots and ducks, asked if they were Doc Martens and I said, no, I think they were like the Payless knockoff. Because we couldn't afford them. So this is amazing. I said, my girl shan't ever wear the, oh, loved it. It's a great brand, Payless. It's just, Docs for me were the thing. Yeah. Okay, great.

51:52Wait, the wrapping paper. See, she loves hers. She's about to put hers on them, hun. The wrapping paper is green and pink on the inside? Yeah, it's a wicked thing. Damn, you really did all that. You really did all that. Oh God, oh God. I'm going to knock over everything. Monty, can I present you with a present? Sure. I also have to say one thing. I bought you something. It says it came. I searched the entire house today. It's not here. I reordered it. Thank you. Wait, but in the meantime. I don't need things. You're a woman of means. You can buy your own shit. I can buy my own things.

52:28Yay. Oh, sweet. the original mouse Dax drew this wow and I used it on my gift guide and now it's on our sweatshirt I thought you should have the original this was the original drawing I love it thank you so much what does it say the world's all time most special mouse in quotes sometimes I think you guys forget this is a podcast we didn't say those were airpods we didn't say these were docs Hey, that's why I said, is this one? Oh! Wow. Because I'm like... Jacob, we're looking for someone to turn the entire show over to, so this could be fucking perfect. Wow. Can I say, these are the best. Oh, man, thank you.

53:18I don't know what, I think that maybe I own like one pair of Doc Martens in my early 20s, and I don't know, I found them very stiff. Maybe I was a knockoff, or maybe I got the wrong pair or something. but immediately these feel gross. They used to be way stiffer. Is that right? Yes. Because I'm like, wait, I was expecting these to be like kind of a pain. Yeah. But they feel amazing instantaneously. And there's a hack. You put them in the freezer overnight. Shut up. You take them out when they're cold and put them directly on because when leather's cold, as it will sort of, I guess, melt, essentially, it will form to your foot.

53:51Shut up. Oh my God, these feel amazing. Also, if we're not doing a good job talking about the items, I guess you should just watch it on YouTube. yeah that's the move Wobby Wob yeah I want let's get you seated for this birthday boy you got your own song but that's not where it ends also the present I got you to I need you to open at the same time I'm excited to see how mama handled this I just want to say for this one Kristen spent at least seven and a half hours on the phone this week and was unsuccessful is that a good setup? Merry Christmas.

54:40Four nights at Tarina Resort. Tarina. Have you ever been? It's really nice. It's so fun. It's so close. Your kids will love it. There's a little slide. The fucking buffet is the best in the biz. It's good for parents and adults. Oh, Jesus Christ. Again, it's yours. Lock up, will you? Thank you. Thank you. This is great. I'm great.

55:11Any more? Do we? Yeah, I want you two. I got presents for you two. That's for me. Yep. That and the big one. That and the big one. And what's that for money? Monica. Okay. Thank you. so much don't worry about the armchair expert wrapping paper good old wrapping okay you want to go first ladies first

55:40this is from Wobby Wob who's again I gotta say when I said there's three exemplary gift givers in this room Wobby Wob is he is I'd also like to comment on the paper because what I'm not hearing is a bunch of like crazy crunch wrap because this paper there is a real there is a hierarchy with wrapping paper and this one has a fabric quality to it almost feels like like a dress maybe you should wear it as a dress okay but it's delicious wrapping paper wabi-wabi real high-end that must have cost you a fortune and is that because oh I mean Amazon I was on. Yeah. Far out. No, I mean, that would make sense to me.

56:22Yeah, that's what on a set it would be. Oh, wow. When you get that stupid fucking shopping bag. Oh, yeah. Like grocery store and rubber. Okay, for the listener, there's a wrap present inside the wrap present. It was a wrap within a wrap. It's the nesting doll. There's a skeleton inside of a sand people. Kind of like the hat on the hat. Is there gonna be another? Oh, boy. Oh, he did it! Oh, we got you. Another box in a box. And this paper is a smell-a-graph. Shut up. Ooh. Pass it. Yeah, pass it. Ooh, it's duckling. A smell-a-graph. You guys, that's what it's called. Now, again, if you're listening, you can't smell it.

57:03And even if you're watching, you can't smell it. On YouTube, you can smell it. There's just a button you click. It's an upgrade. That's a gift in itself. Wow. Did you spray something or is it that how it goes? Wow. God, it's really nice. I'm telling you. He's got like a little workshop at his house. The high-end wrapping store. They have a lot. We're down to the actual gift. Is there a store or maybe? What? Your gift also didn't come yet. It's supposed to come today. Oh my God. Oh my God. It's my dream come true. Is that a real picture? No. Yeah, I spent time. Dreams. In my dreams. And it's a picture.

57:45It's a picture of me. Okay, for the listener and not the viewer. There's a sweater coming. Oh, thank you. Oh, my gosh. How sweet. But this is the real gift. It's a picture of me with Mary-Kate and Ashley. And I look like I'm friends with them. You're in the sweater that's coming. It's so cute. Iconic. Unbelievable. That's great. I love it. And I'll buy these pants for sure. oh okay this one this one can live like that and that's a manifest because they're gonna come on at some point thank you rob that's so sweet okay now i need you guys open but you can you open yours of this too well race quick quick listener it seems to be a race and dax is in the lead and Los Angeles, California Oh, these are really nice Do you know about these?

58:41What is this? It's olive oil It's olive oil, but they were personalized It pairs nicely with elk Mine says Wabi Sabi for Wabi Wabi Wow Personalized And for people who don't know, Jax has been on a real kick of eating elk lately and so in the mornings he has elk and eggs which makes the house smell terrible but it's actually pretty tasty and he gets like 160 grams of protein during breakfast. That's a lot of protein. And now I'll get a little omega in the two. Yeah, yeah. And let's both say something at the same time. Three, two, one. Oh! I almost forgot it. For the listener, I almost kissed Rob's lips.

59:19Wow. Okay. Here we go.

59:27Ever since I learned about that landing strip, I'm just having the most confusing feelings about you. Dax is opening the present from Rodman. You complained at one point that you didn't have enough knickknacks behind you and Monica had more. Oh, Rodman and Isaiah Thomas, 88, 89. They were too young, but that was the team. Oh my God, that's so cool. Oh, that's great. Was that in eBay? Nope, it was Target. Oh, great. Target had that? Had those two guys together from 1989? They won back-to-back titles. No, yeah, but Target had that. I know, I remember that. That's wild. Yeah. Yeah, a very deep cut for Tari, right?

1:00:04Amazing. Oh, this is great. Oh, this is, you're gonna have a big one. Oh, I got a biggie. Whoa. Oh, great, and this has a Yeti wrapping paper, not to be confused with the cooling brand. An actual Yeti. Oh, fuck. Does it smell? Is it the smell of that? Is having trouble opening the package? I'm gonna, here's what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna play a game where you guys will see it first. and trying to describe it to you. Guessing on your reaction, I'm going to see if I can figure out what it is. Oh, guessing on our reaction, okay. Okay, well, it is a... Car accident? A piece of art. It's a piece of art.

1:00:42Okay, so Gabe, it seems like it might be a bad car accident. Is that what it is? Someone eating a corpse? Wow, Rob, that's beautiful. So it's this Australian artist, Bella McGoldrick. Oh, wow. It's a pencil drawing? It's beautiful. That's so cool. Oh, man. I was going to ask. Yeah. 15 of 20 I read at the bottom. Oh, I love a limited edition. Your eyes aren't that good. How'd you get that? Check my work. No, you got it. But we both know you and I are blind. That's true. I don't know. Somehow I caught it. Wow. Oh, my God. That's gorgeous. So cool. Wabby Wab. Thank you. Wow. Thoughtful son of a bitch.

1:01:21Three, two, one. Three, two, one. We say something. You're not coming back. Okay. What's the name of the artist, Rock? And then you two have one. Bellamy Goldrick. Beautiful. We have one more? You two have another one for me. Oh my gosh, okay. They're the white boxes. Oh, okay. Wait, I know this paper. Three. Well, Monica, they don't deserve this.

1:01:47What? They make boys? We're about to find out.

1:01:56Ooh. Oh. They do make voice stuff. Let's make sure, I mean, also, obviously, we can return if things don't fit. But it was imperative that everyone in this room had something from the row based on how much we talk about it. Wow. Beautiful. So, you're welcome. But if it doesn't fit, obviously, it doesn't fit. Oh, wow. Let me see. Oh, yours, okay, yours a little thinner. Yours more of a springtime. Mine's more of a, let's hit the slope. Yeah. Oh, thank you, Moni. You're welcome. That's beautiful. And I got a rose sweater, too. It all worked out. All came out in the wash. Okay. So, we've had our pasta.

1:02:35We've had some desserts. It's time to land the plane hard with some more music. So, musical director, what's our next offering? Monica requested Auld Lang Syne. I did. I love Auld Lang Syne. Two, three. Should old acquaintance be forgot and never brought to mind? Should old acquaintance be forgot and days of old lang syne? For Auld Lang Syne, my dear, for Auld Lang Syne. We'll take a cup of kindness yet for Auld Lang Syne. And here's a hand, my trusty friend, and he's a hand of thine. We'll take a cup of kindness yet for Auld Lang Syne. For Auld Lang Syne, my dear, for Auld Lang Syne. We'll take a cup of kindness yet For old Lang Syne Yay!

1:04:39I don't even like that song and I loved it. I like it with some more music. Thank you, that was very special. Oh, that was good. It was really fun to sing that for the first time two days ago. because it was like, oh, we don't really know it yet, but that was already so fun. I like to picture my whole year when I hear it. Wow. The one you just had or the one you're about to have? The one I just had. It's bye. It's bye to the year. You were doing like the Apple photo thing. And what's the verdict on this year? Oh, it was a complicated year, but a good building year. Building year. Wow. It was like deep.

1:05:22Ask me, hit me. It was like, yeah, what's the verdict on this year for you, Dax? Oh. It was good. It was good. It was a building year. I'm stronger for it. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. No, I had a great fucking year. I really did. It was a lovely year. We had a lot of fun trips. Kids just get more and more and more interesting and funny and more fun to be around. Yeah. We had a great year work-wise. Yeah. Another great year. It was a good year. The big one? Oh, we should get... Erica, we have a closer. Yeah. We're going to bring in a closer. Closing pitcher. And this, a lot of people know Perfect 10 Charlie.

1:06:06And they know he's married to Erica. And they've met Perfect 10 Charlie on here. And now you're going to get to meet Erica on here. And if you listened to Synced, Erica had made an appearance on Synced. And people were like, she needs to be on every episode. She's a boss bitch. She's a tough, cool, radical The kind of gal that Kristen falls in love with Yeah, Erica's a very powerful presence Assertive She's very decisive, assertive She can wail She's got such a beautiful voice Hi, Erica You're no stranger to some side zippies Welcome I think it's just D for me, right? Christmas time is here Happiness and cheer Oh, this is cozy Cozy.

1:06:48Cozy. It's tight. Cozy. Cute sweater. Thank you. Hi, Erica. Welcome to the program. We gave you an intro, but you weren't in the room. No, I'm here now. We're saying your praises. Pull that mic a little closer to yourself. Okay, hi. Although you got a big old fucking powerful.

1:07:07That's right, I'll turtle it. Well, Rob said he's gonna ride it. Do you want this for when you ride it? He's gonna ride it. He's gonna what? Anyways, in our intro, we said, people know Perfect Ten Charlie. Yes. And now the beautiful bride. That's right. Yes. Takes a big woman to live up to those looks and boy, does she do it. I'm a pitch hitter today. Get it? Musical theater jokes. I love. Well, earlier you said pitch hitter. I did. And so she said she's a pitch hitter. Oh. Yeah. Like a. Pitch. I got it. So, yeah, mm-hmm. It's a really cool, theater kids are typically cool. They're generally rocking the school.

1:07:49That's the theme of today. They're bullies, though. That's the only thing I don't like about them. They're always shoving guys in lockers. And it's singing about it. Okay, I also just want to say, for my money, this is my favorite Christmas song in the world. This is number one. You say that right before we start it? No pressure. Oh, that's too much pressure. Okay, I just broke up. I broke one of the rules. That's all right. Theater rules. But I love that you love it, and that is why it was important to get it, because Charlie Brown Christmas is very important to us. It's the one to watch. Yeah, it's who brought you to the party.

1:08:24That's right. It's our first Christmas cartoon. That's right. I'm going to tell one second story. My mother encouraged me to do this. Back in the old days, I was trying to explain this to our children, and they could not conceptualize what I was saying. I was like, girls, there was only three channels. That's it. And if you didn't see it, you missed it, and there was no way to record it. and these bastards in Detroit, you had two, four, and seven, they would counter program. So you'd have the Grinch on channel two at eight and you would have Charlie Brown and channel four at eight and you had to fucking pick and you were seven and it was not cool.

1:08:54And my mother said, you should write a letter to the stations. And I did. I wrote a letter to the stations and they did not respond. But I do think streaming might be a result of that letter. Right. And now you can watch it. It's on, what is it on? Apple Plus? Oh, right now, Charlie Brown's on Apple Plus, and I think everyone can watch it for free right now. I think that particular cartoon can be watched on Apple Plus for free right now. And it's the one to watch. Yeah, we watched it last night.

1:09:22Christmas time is here. Happiness and cheer. Fun for all that children call their favorite time of year. Snowflakes in the air, carols everywhere. Olden times and ancient rhymes of songs and dreams to share. Sleigh bells in the air, beauty everywhere. Yuletide by the fireside and joyful memories there. Christmas time is here Happiness and cheer Fun for all that children call Their favorite time of year Yeah! There we go! Now we're talking. Apple Plus. Now Christmas is here. Amazing. Oh my God. Beautiful. Guys, that is so hard, what they just did. It is. Good job. This was Kristen. She and you guys just did this in your choir class.

1:11:06So she's just coming off of hearing it with like 25 of you singing. So I just want to thank you from the bottom of my heart because I know that's not how you wanted to do it. And Dax was like, just sing it alone. I was like, I cannot sing it alone. That will ruin the integrity of the arrangement. I must have Erica pop in and do the alto part. That doesn't align with your values. We squished it. We made it happen. It's a good time for defiance. That's right. Tell us about your choir class. You want to tell the world about your choir class? So fun. Well, we were talking a long time ago about how if you're an adult and you have hobbies, like you like to dance, or maybe you played baseball in high school, you could go do that again.

1:11:43You could join a league. You could, you know, you could take a dance class. You can do it just for fun. And so we were like, you can't do that anywhere singing wise. And so we're like, well, do we have to make it right? And Erica, who knows everything about publicity and marketing, she was like, let's beta test this. And after I looked that up, I was like, yes, let's do that. And we like basically emailed, DM'd a bunch of like local singers that we know, some that aren't local, some people that we know that have different jobs, but just like really, really whale. and one of the coolest things is when we first started and now it's like probably 35 of us and about 25 or 28 come every week and it's like it's sort of rotating.

1:12:26You got a bogey too, right? You guys all have a guy no one knows which I love. Now you probably do. He's the best. He's the absolute best. We don't know how he got there but he's incredible and he helps us set up and it's wonderful. He bakes bread. Uh-huh, uh-huh. And the... You're not supposed to eat stuff from strangers. Well, we're eating In this choir, we're eating a lot of stuff from strangers. Everybody makes something. We bring wine. We sit around. We harmonize together. If you don't love a pot light, look, it's not for you. One of the first times when we were at a theater, there was a security guard at the theater.

1:12:55And halfway through the class, he starts just riffing. And it was the most beautiful sounds. And we were like, whoa, whoa, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Sir? Sir? Excuse me? That Goodwill Hunter's going to say. Get on in here. And he was singing with us. We've had a lot of drop-ins of very cool people. And it's just been very soul-fulfilling. It's lovely. It's such a cool thing you guys did. It's so casual. We just socialized. It's great. I can't go to my AA meeting anymore, but that's okay. I'm sure we've prioritized the right thing in the house. We're done with Mondays. We're done with Mondays.

1:13:31It's going back to its original day. I'm so glad you guys have that. Kristen's always so happy when she comes home from that. It's so nurturing to her, her beautiful little soul. Mama, thank you. You put this whole thing together. Yes, thank you. You rehearsed. You swindled everyone into coming and doing this. And thank you so much for doing that. Erica, thank you for popping by. Gabe, thank you so much. Jacob, come on now. Vote even more excited. Anna. I'm off mic, but. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Of course I am. All right, I love you guys. Merry Christmas.

1:14:15Happy holidays. Love everyone here. May everyone get a dino this year.