Joey King Returns

21:04And if you're a listener that's queasy, you really need to fast forward 30 seconds. I bite down and I go, oh, fuck. Like I know immediately what it is because nothing feels like tooth enamel. Like enamel is enamel. I go. And I reach in and I pull out and there is an entire pig tooth with the root. What do you mean? Joey. No, that's the most important part. I'm so sorry. What do you mean? A pig. Well, because I'm eating a hot dog. It was the kind of sharp pig to the incisor. Like a tusk vibes. Yes. Tusk vibes big. And then the whole fucking root. So it's fucking yellow in the end. And then the root's white.

21:47Dude, we don't need the colors. We don't need the colors. You do. Because you've got to understand, this was the single worst moment I'd ever experienced sensorily. Where I went, oh, like, oh. Unimaginably terrible. Oh. Horrifying. My. And then I'm like, how did this get into the hot dog? They grind everything. That's the part. Did you chase this man fucking down? No, no, I had to sit by the car. I couldn't leave my post. What if it needed a quick little... Yeah, there's a smudge on the window. That is so horrific. I'm so, so, so, so sorry this happened to you. No one in there, the whole world can top you on this.

22:22But we've all had a moment of like... Can you think of one? I have a moment where I was thinking about, my sister lost a tooth in the morning while she was like drinking cranberry juice in her brown Juicy Couture sweatsuit. Oh, and it fell out and she like almost swallowed it and she had to like cough it back up. It was like a half vomit situation to get the tooth in it. It's gross. And you witnessed the whole thing? Yeah, I was at the breakfast table looking at my multiple choice like equations before I went to school. Classic. I know, I was doing my flashcards. And she yacked the tooth up basically.

22:53And she was like, you know what, sorry about that noise. So sorry about that noise. Now that's, yeah, I'm so sorry. Warning, that noise sucks. Okay, wait. I want to circle back to our Hanks. Yeah. Gross foods. We were supposed to hang. We interviewed you two years ago and we tried a few times. But this is what my biggest haunt of my life, not of my life, but my biggest haunt is that the last time we canceled, I was like, this is so absurd. They're going to think we're lying. I can't even remember what the reasoning was. My husband gave himself salmonella. Oh, I believe that. Do you remember that?

23:27But that sounds like an excuse. Yeah, yeah. But he was sick for 10 days. How did he give it to himself? He made chicken and it was just... He was impatient. It was moist and juicy, but it was a little bit in the middle, perhaps pink. And you didn't eat it. You don't eat meat. I do eat meat. I love it. You didn't eat that chicken. I did not eat the parts of the chicken. You knew you saw. I said, this looks a little pink. and he goes, I'll put it back in for a little bit. And he did. And then he took it out and then we were eating it and I was like, it feels a little bit pink, but he knows better.

24:04He made it. He was with the chicken. He was looking at it. He was touching it. He's feeling it. Yeah, he's in there. And then that night, it was like the day before we were supposed to hang out. We were supposed to get dinner the next night, I think. And then he like woke up in the middle of the night and he was like, something is very wrong with me. And I was like, oh no. And then I was like, he'll feel better by tomorrow night. And it was 10 days. Diary of everything. Okay, now do you think instead he could have had cyclospora? This was a year and a half ago. It happens every year. Wait, what's cyclospora?

24:34That's the lettuce thing that's been going around. Yeah, Dex is offended by cyclospora. You kind of don't like that people are talking about it, right? Oh, no. It worries you? No. Wait, are you afraid of it or you just think it's a little... He's not. He's the opposite. I was at a salad bar. I'm the opposite of afraid of it too. I am so not... I don't have time to worry about it. We're in Southern California. I don't think it's affected SoCal yet. No, I got it. When? During this whole thing. This one? Yes, this one. Have you been traveling? Yes. I was traveling in Europe, though. It's not in Europe.

25:03Okay. Midwest? No, I didn't make any trips to the Midwest. You were in New York? After. Oh. I've been treating that thing like it doesn't exist. Wow. Good for you. That's the move. But I normally, I'm so afraid of foodborne illnesses because I have been so brutally sick in my life with foodborne illness. But this one, I was just like, right? I had such a dramatic thing to say. Food porn illness, food poisoning. I had such bad food poisoning back in 2023. I'll never forget it. What'd you eat? I went to a Michelin star restaurant. I think I talked about this. Maybe with you guys, maybe not. But it was really sad.

25:37It was like a really amazing meal. I have all the pictures of that meal in my hidden folder in my camera roll because I can't look at them. Oh, yeah. But I don't want to delete them because it was a special meal. It's like the penny. I was just going to say. Let me have your phone. I'll clean this up. I'll give a shit. Who's that? Like it was a really special memory, but I can't look at the food without feeling so gross. Yeah. That night it was happening mouth and bum. I genuinely thought I was like going to die. Yeah. I've had that several times. And I was hoping I would because it was so bad.

26:05I was so terrified of eating things after that, especially if like it was seafood, lettuces or anything. But, you know, the brain and the body forget. And now I'm like, whatever. Well, time heals all. Exactly. Time heals all. In September, I will have not had a drink in 22 years. And I have never even gotten close, right? Congratulations. I'm not even bragging about that. I just want you to know in 22 years, I've never been tempted to drink. The only time I was like, I may have to drink. I've been on a USO tour. I was eating all the military food for eight days. Then we flew out of Kuwait, their first class lounge.

26:40There's a beautiful buffet. I went nuts. My friends were like, you're getting real bold with the Kuwaiti buffet. I was like, what are you talking about? Don't be racist. What are you saying? You did not say that. I did to be funny. You did? Yeah, to be funny. I mean, stop being racist. Get on the airplane. Fucking during taxiing. I'm like, I have a tiny, like, I'm going to let a bubble out. Like a burp? No. The other end. Oh, bubble? Like a fart? Yeah, but I'm going to let first a bubble. I'm going to let a micron out first. I know exactly what you mean. I knew you would. I knew you would. You have to, like, a little, like, you know, the ones where, like, they almost disappear in your cheek and it's like, yeah, I think of it as like a bubble this big that comes out.

27:22And I know that I let a bubble this big out. And that little bubble told me you're dead. You're in so much trouble. And I was in so much trouble. So then that was a six or eight hour flight to Germany. Then there was a six hour flight to New York, both ways, the whole ride, then get on the plane in New York to fly to LA. I have another five and a half hours. And when I sat down on a plane for that five and a half hours, I was in so much pain and agony. I didn't know how I was going to get through the five hour flight. I don't know how you got it through. I might have to have a jacket diet to like exist.

27:59Oh my God. The only time I thought I might have to, for like medical reasons, have a drink or something. That is crazy that that was like your only tempting moment. But But I know the moment before you get food poisoning, that is a, it's a heroin time. You know. You know. After my big meal in Barcelona, I'm eating this beautiful meal. I'm on FaceTime with my friend. And I'm like, I just had a gorgeous dinner. Oh, my goodness. It was amazing. I am so full. Oh, yes, yes, yes. Yeah. It starts as a really full feeling. You're right. I was like, God, I'm full. I'm so sorry that this episode is. We've really gone down a rabbit hole.

28:38Everyone who is still with us. This is a problem for a lot of people to hear. I know. And we started with pica and eating someone's mom. Yeah, we did. That's how we got here, I think. I forgot about that. The other unique thing about food poisoning, because again, well, no, no, this isn't going to be gross. Okay. Just I've gotten it so many times because as we discussed, I didn't care about that cyclospore. I don't care. I'll eat anything. I've had it so bad a few times. One time in a hotel in Palm Springs, I was there writing by myself and I got it at a Thai restaurant. Don't be racist. All of it.

29:07I know. Well, it just shows I'm not racist. I'm not eating any Caucasian food ever. What do you describe as Caucasian food? I know. Hot dogs. Beans on toast. I think I strike it from the record. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's something about food poisoning, like on that second day or whatever, if it's that bad, where you feel a loneliness. Can you really, especially if you were in Spain. Yeah. I feel so lonely. It's like the loneliest I've ever felt. Is it because you're like, am I ever going to be normal again? Am I ever going to be normal? And I'm so alone in this experience and I don't want anyone around.

29:42Oh my God, you don't want anyone around. I don't want help. Get the fuck away from me. Steven was with me when I was... Oh, that's nice. Did he want to take care of you? Yeah, but good God, nothing would have made it worse than having someone next to me. So I was like, go in the other room. Just into a different hotel. And he didn't get it. We ate the same thing. He didn't get it. What's weird? What is the guidance to do? I'm sick for a long time. I said, leave me alone. I hear the theme song of Seinfeld turn on. And it was very, the volume was high. And I was in no place to hear. And I was like, turn that down.

30:17Your favorite song would sound terrible when you're in that state. Oh, God, horrible. I know. Should we move on? I'm so sorry. Yes, we're going to. We're going to go to the thing that. No, this is great. I can't believe I didn't discover this the last time we spoke. Discover what? This is maybe my favorite thing I've learned about you is that Terry King, your father, was a competitive arm wrestler in the 80s. Yes. In 1987, in his weight class, won a championship and was a technical advisor on over the top. Is that part true? So I actually didn't know about this 87 championship. I have pictures of my dad from that time.

30:58But he moved to California from Arkansas when he was 17 to become a stuntman. And it never happened for him. But he did do one job. And that one job was Sylvester Stallone's stunt double in Over the Top. Wow. Isn't that crazy? There's a picture. Is that him on the right? No. On the left. No, I'm kidding. That is, no, neither of the, is this an AI image? Okay, Rob, this is a wrong image. It's me taking a photograph off of the computer to send to Rob. I was searching everywhere for a picture of Terry King in this era arm wrestling. And I thought, oh, if he's the 87 champ, there'll be photos of that.

31:33It's a pretty wild story. It's like to move here from Arkansas. And he wound up becoming an electrician, basically, for the Department of Water and Power for 45 years. That's what my dad's career was. But before that, yeah, he was a professional arm wrestler. Does he have enormous pipes? Because some of these guys, they don't. And yet they're so strong. No, my dad used to, I mean, he's thinner now and everything, but he used to have, his forearms were like the same size as his biceps. And my dad never went to the gym. Like it was just kind of like genetics. He was just kind of a muscular dude.

32:05And it's like him and my mom met, my mom worked at Seafood Broiler. The story ends, they're divorced, thank God. But that's good. I didn't know that. That's good. We're happy about that. We're thrilled. Life became better. Divorce can be a beautiful thing sometimes. Yeah. But they met when she was working at Seafood Broiler. My dad came in as a customer. She was a real estate agent at the time, like starting to be a real estate agent. And then they like met and they started having me and my sisters. Stay tuned for more Armchair Expert, if you dare. We are supported by Allstate. Checking Allstate first could save you hundreds on car insurance.

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36:41Do you have any memories of going to events and watching dad arm wrestle? By the time I was born, he was fully an electric show. Yeah, because it was 12 years after the championship. Yeah, he genuinely did that one job, but he would talk about it a lot. And my dad would always intimidate my sister's boyfriends by like grabbing their hands really hard. Oh, yes. And like just proving that he could break their hands if he wanted to. You're supposed to kind of do that as the dad. It was really, really, he would really hurt them. Oh, no. They were like, oh, my God, Mr. King, please stop it. Please stop it.

37:15Okay, past the point of. He was like, I'm going to get you, boy. Like, he's crazy. My dad's crazy. But isn't that crazy? Like it is such an interesting piece. And then like my dad, like I find old photos of him and I see old photos of my mom. And you don't recognize these strangers because of what they look like and how my dad used to have like a mullet. It's like, who were they? And my dad used to be like shirtless at the championships. That is so not my dad's personality. Like he would arm wrestle with his top off. I mean, he was posing with trophies with his top off. Oh, I love it. He must have been so thrilled to get to meet Sly.

37:49He was so excited. And also my dad is very, what's the word I'm looking for? He's met so many people in LA over the years being an electrician. He services a lot of people's homes. And at the time he often was meeting people when their power was out and they were upset. They're at their worst. So he's jaded? I've never met anyone like my dad. The way he digests things is not quite the same as like, I wouldn't say it's jaded, but he just has very judgmental, hard opinions on people that are very declarative. Even if someone is super nice, he can be like, I don't know about that. And you're just like, what is going on?

38:23He's kind of negative. I'm like, what are you talking about? He's so nice. But he like was super excited. I think he had like all these expectations of like what being on a film set was like. And I think Sylvester Stallone was probably very kind and very focused. Oh, he was a little disappointed. I mean, he always. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's the personality type. But he's also got very excited over the years when I would work with people too. Oh, I'm sure. But if I were an arm wrestling champion, I don't think anyone listening would understand the context of 1987. So we didn't have UFC fighting.

38:52You had boxing. My dad loved UFC. Sure. We barely had Monica Padman. We just had her. Just barely. Depending on when the championship was. A whisper of her sneaking on it. Yeah. If it was after August 24th. Ding, ding, ding. Coming up. Coming up. I'm not turning 27, unfortunately. What are you turning? Are you not? incredible, incredible year. How have you enjoyed your 30s? Sorry to deviate. Oh, no. That's a great question. I've enjoyed them so much. Yeah? I'm so happy. Is 30s where it's at? A hundred percent. I have no desire to be back in my 20s. I'm a little anxious about these 40s. Heard they're great.

39:32I've heard they're great, too. I've heard good things. I've only heard good things. It kind of just gets better. That's what we've heard. You know what? I can't wait for my brain to continue to mature. You really become you in your 30s. You just relax. I mean, like, I've already feel like I'm cresting past some weird mental health stuff that I think I was in for the last two years. And I'm starting to feel like me again. And I think I'm like, wait, I think it's going to get better even more than this. I can feel that. I can feel that coming. OK, this is more of an update I need. Two years ago, when you would go to bed, you were putting tape over your mouth.

40:08You had a bite guard in and you were doing hair masks. That was your routine two years ago. Right. Have you added more to it? Have you lost any? What's happening with your routine? I do nothing now. I do none of that. I forget my night guard nightly. Who needs it? Mouth tape actually, I think would be good. What can I say? I forgot to keep it up. Okay. And at the time, my hair was going through some severe bleaching for the show that I was on. And so it's better now. You don't need it. I don't need it. I'm sure as time goes by, I'll pick up some nightly routines. I'll pick up some fads, more stuff that I'll let go.

40:49Like loafers with socks. Exactly. But I have shorter legs, so I don't think I'll be doing that one. But if I was wearing a miniskirt, maybe I would. Or maybe long pants. Nothing in between. No midi skirts. Is your husband appreciative? Like, because my curiosity was at that time, we were very newly married and you were putting all this apparati on your face and head. That was my inquiry last time. My mom said the same thing when I was doing it. Anyone would point it out. She was like, I just want to sleep next to that. I was like, mom. She's like, you look crazy. It sounds like you were rehabbing from a severe burn, you know, like you're laying next to a medical.

41:26By the way, knock on wood, because I did have a very severe facial burn last year. Oh my God. This was last year in like March or April or something. I was cooking at home. Another chicken situation. And I was putting chicken thighs into like a very hot pot. And I like kind of chucked them in there. And the hot oil spit back on my face. And I had a burn going all down my neck. Oh my God. Did it bubble? It looked so bad. It looked like it was going to scar terribly. Yeah. And luckily it didn't. But I remember I was on a red carpet after it had healed enough to put makeup on it. But you could still see there was like dry patches and it looked a little bit red.

42:03There was like a video of me on TikTok where I was like posing on the carpet and I looked maybe slightly anxious. I don't know. And people in the comments were like, what's going on with her neck? Oh, there is marks on her neck. Oh, they thought you were getting abused? They thought I potentially tried to hurt myself. Oh, hurt yourself. Or something else. Something nefarious. It was so strange to me because I half read it as kind concern and then I half read it as you really just don't know anybody. Exactly. Just leave everyone alone. I literally just like was cooking. Yeah. You know, everything's a conspiracy there.

42:37And then I did have to sleep with some crazy stuff on after that. Some heavy ass creams and sometimes like saran wrap on things so that the creams would stay. My best friend was coming over and I was cooking her dinner. And then it happened right before she came and she like knocked on the door and I was like holding ice cubes on my face. I was like, hey, come on in. I just burned myself. I'll be fine. Because it wasn't marking yet. Yeah. But it really was burning. So I explained to her what happened. And she was like, you're crazy. This is going to scar. You're an actress. Like, we need to take care of this right now.

43:07Yeah. Thank God for her, because I was not locked into an urgent state of mind. And then when she was like, this will scar, all of a sudden I was like, wait a minute. That can't happen. Yeah. You're like a surgeon who just cut a finger off. And you're like, should I go get it reattached? Ah, fuck. Throw it in the trash with the pennies. Yeah, like, I'll be fine. I'll operate without it. But then once it was healing and it was looking like it was scarring, but it was definitely getting better day by day, I started giving myself really nice blowouts in my hair so I could feel pretty because I was like, this is crazy.

43:37And I have like a couple of photos of me selfies in my camera roll from that time where I'm just like really like serving because I was just like, I need to feel pretty right now. But it was a really interesting pattern. I'm so glad it didn't scar. But if it had and I wasn't an actress, I wouldn't have been embarrassed to go out or anything. Right, right, right, right. But I'm an actress, so it would have been a problem. Well, you could have turned into a character actor. Yes! You're like really dark. I've got a thing. You've got a thing. I've got a cool, I've got a... Oh, that's Joey with facial scars.

44:04Well, look, again, this is a privilege of a man, but there's several really famous, cool actors that have some cool scourge on their face. Yeah. Yeah. Maybe Norman Reed. I shouldn't name names, but... Am I right, Rob? Norman Reedus, does he have a rad scar? Oh, is he about the Sons of Anarchy guy? Yeah. Yeah, he's got a cool scar, I think. What about, oh, God, the Omar from The Wire? Michael K. Williams. Thank you. Did he pass away? He did. It's so sad. Amazing scar. Yeah. He did. He had the coolest scar. And you know how he got that? I actually don't. He was an addict, and he got that at a bar.

44:39Someone razored him in the face. I think anybody who has a defining characteristic about them and is brave enough to just put themselves out there. If you're him, if you're Michael K and you own that shit, you're like, that's fucking cool looking. If you're him and you're like cowering all the time, then you're like, oh, this poor man. You have the choice to tell others how they should feel about it. I mean, I think you feel that way about even if we pare down having some kind of obvious, let's say, scarring or disability or anything. If you pare that back even, I just think you have the ability to kind of dictate how anyone just feels about you.

45:14even if you have insecurities or anxiety. I think that that's a piece of my puzzle over the last couple of years where I've just been like, oh, if I'm feeling this way about me, I really don't want to show up that way into the world because it allows other people to feel that way about me. I know that I don't need that. So are you saying in the past couple of years you've been sort of riddled with like other people's opinions of you? That's a good question. Or like what's been going on? What's been going on? going on in these last two years with you? I don't know. There's been amazing moments.

45:48There's been low moments. I keep making jokes. I'm like, my frontal lobe developed two years ago and it's terrible. But there's a part of me that's like, maybe that's what it was. Maybe that's true. I think that I was feeling a little bit out of my realm of joy. I feel like I've always reached for joy really easily in my life. And then it became a little bit tougher and I couldn't pinpoint why and that was really freaking me out because I feel like I'm a very positive person. And then that made me start to really feel badly about myself because I wasn't able to like find the joy. You were judging yourself.

46:21And then like everything that was maybe not so serious to me once upon a time felt like dire. And it was like, what is going on? Like, why do I feel like things that don't usually bother me or upset me feel so dire? And I would get lost in that thought. And then once I exhausted that, I would beat myself up for not being able to get out of it. Exactly. Even if I wake up feeling this way every day and I'm moving through the world this way, I do kind of believe in like the fake it till you make it vibe in terms of just like if you put on a fake smile, it eventually becomes a real smile because it does make you feel better.

46:52Last week, I got bad news about something, but I had to jump right into an interview that was like half an hour long. And once the interview was over, like I actually did feel better because I was being jovial and forced to make conversation about other things and kind of feel happy for a minute. It goes such a long way to just like try to change your perspective and feel positive. It's so much easier said than done. But I think that there was, yeah, just like a thing of like if I put out what I'm feeling deeply into the world every day, it's not going to reflect nicely. You recognize the power of distraction in preventing rumination.

47:31Rumination's death. Jemima Jo Kirk does this thing with Elle magazine every now and then where she answers burning questions from young women. They're incredible. her things was somebody was saying like, I'm feeling so insecure about myself and da, da, da, da, da, like, what should I do? And her answer was like, you should stop thinking about yourself so much. And I was like, oh my God, wait, she's right. So then every time I would get kind of in one of those weird holes, I was like, wow, I'm really just thinking about me so much right now. Like, what if I tried to think about someone else or like other things?

48:04And it would kind of help me get out of that mindset. But I finally feel like I'm stepping out of that hole I was in for a while. Yeah, this is the hack of AA, which is you're required to do service, but we admit and acknowledge the service is selfish. So I'm going to help you. But in helping you, I'll be forced to stop thinking about myself. And all of my relief is going to come from stopping evaluating what could make Dax happier, what could make Dax feel more status, all these things. It's very hard to be doing it while you're actively dealing with someone else's problem. Totally. So it's like, even though it seems selfless, it's for you.

48:41It's relief from yourself. I agree. I feel so sometimes distracted and annoyed that I'm like stuck with me forever. Yeah. But then I'm like, that's fine. You just don't have to make it all about you. Yeah. And also too, there's just like something really kind of important about losing your way for a second. Because I do think it allows you to remember what feeling great can feel like, strive to get back there, but like learn a lot of things about how you deal with stress of all kinds, familial, financial, whatever it is, it's going to feel really exhausting and hard. But when you learn it young, I think it sets you up for a brighter path of dealing with it when you get older.

49:28And also it allowed me to be like, I may be feeling all these things right now and I can't totally pinpoint why, or maybe having a harder time grabbing onto like the joyous feeling that I normally am able to grab onto. Can't pinpoint why. Like at the end of the day, when I look at my life, when I've got my family, when I look at every person in my life that I have, I am really happy. I'm really happy. I've got great people in my life. I might be feeling these things and those things can exist at the same time. So it's like, I felt good about, I was like, I'm allowed to feel this way. I'm allowed to like have that space to feel this way.

49:58And because I'm not having to stress about, I don't have like a crumbling marriage. I don't have like a horrible relationship with my sister. I'm ruminating on these things because I don't have these outside stressors that are really bad. So it's just allowed me to be kind of grateful that those were my problems. Also, nobody makes a change who is content. None of us like to change. It's not comfortable to change. So in a weird way, if you're consistently happy and content, what you're also admitting is like, well, you're never going to change because we don't change for fun. No. Right. We change because we're unhappy or we've got to make an adjustment.

50:36Big stuff happens. Yeah. It's weird. We all desire to be completely happy at all times, but then you'd be acknowledging, well, then I'll never change. I'm going to be the same person in 40 years because why would I change if I'm happy? You're also probably not that happy if you're you're always happy. Well, it's all in relation, right? You don't have a contrast or a concept of why you're happy if you're always happy. You're probably not putting yourself out there that much. Yeah. And not to say I was like always happy. It was just more like I had an easier time grabbing on to like the better perspective, the happier thought, waking up on the right side of the bed.

51:11It kind of sounds chemical if I'm being honest. It just sounds like hormonal. I know. I think it was like a brain change, a body change, something. And I think it's good to have contrast in your life. And to learn things are temporary. I think that's a big part of it. Yeah, I was just going to say, I think part of the discomfort is when you're in that situation, you think it's permanent. This is the new me. What happened? I used to be so happy. Every time I get my period, the week before the feeling, I'm like, this is how I feel forever. Miserable. I'll never feel different. And then it passes.

51:42I'm like, wait a minute. Oopsie, forgot. OK, another thing that's happened in the last two years is I probably found in my research then two years ago that you were friends with Sabrina Carpenter, but I really didn't care. My then 10 year old became obsessed with her. So then I was listening to music with her all the time. And then I took her to the show and I just so obsessed with her now. Among the best moments of my entire life was we're leaving the show and we had to drive back from downtown L.A. home and we held hands and we were listening on repeat that song. Don't smile because it happened, baby.

52:16Cry because it's over. I want you to miss me. Holding hands with my daughter. Listen to that song on repeat. Love that song. I was like euphoric. Yeah. I owe this woman such a debt of gratitude. Now I'm really delighted you guys are best friends. We have known each other for many, many moons. I think what's a blessing for both of you guys is that it worked out for both of you guys. Yeah, it is a blessing. It can be a little stressful if you've both endeavored on this thing, and then one of you just gets left in the dust. You know, that happens. I know what you mean. One thing about her, though, is she's just a loyal friend.

52:53She just always has the same friends. We've just been friends forever. All of her friends have been her friends mostly for so many years. She's the best. I love the vibe. It's so good. I know she's so talented. She's so smart. Yeah. She's really in charge. I'm just always like, you're kind of, you're so clever. Well, last time you were on, you said that you were talking to her on the way to the show, to our show. Yes. And I was like, and yeah, Dax didn't really know or care. And I was like, this is a big deal. This is a big deal. He's notoriously late on most things. So then he found out. I mean, I'm 51.

53:32Cut me some slack. Yeah, I was cutting you slack. I don't know what the fuck's going on. You know what? I was thinking about that. I actually called her right afterwards as well to be like, I just finished. I was actually on the phone. My sister, speaking of wonderful women in my life, my sister was telling me that she said, you have to tell them today that I love Armchair Anonymous and I've been dying to have a topic that I get to call in for. She needs to write in. Hold on a second. I'll go a step further. Tell us what to do. Ask her what her favorite craziest story is. Okay. And I bet we could build a whole prompt around it.

54:07Yeah, sure. Yeah. Oh, my God. It'd be so easy. Oh, my God. This is a done deal. This is Hunter, by the way. We need more stuff about Hunter King. I'm so delighted she loves Armchair Anonymous. That means you're nasty. She's nasty. Yeah, we're nasty. It's such a good show. She's nasty. Like, it's our best show. Did she tell you about it at all? Yes, of course. Okay. Absolutely. She was telling me about, of course, the poop ones. Obviously. Yeah, those are great. We would like to do those every Friday, but we have to police ourselves. Or foreign objects up the bottom. I was going to say, what is taken over from the duty stories is these foreign objects and bodies.

54:36Because what happened is we end up interviewing a lot of nurses. And nurses are our favorite demographic in the world. We love nurses. The best stories. They're all so playful. And they've seen it all. They're wonderful. And one of them happened to just mention it in another story. And I go, oh, my God, how many times have you seen that? And she's like, oh, 30 or 40. She goes, you'll never meet a nurse who's not dealt with 30 or 40 foreign objects in body. It feels right. That feels like the right number to me. Have you ever had a foreign object in your body? That would be an exclusive. Yeah, exclusive.

55:11Okay, we're going to cut the clip right there. I was watching a new Jackass movie the other day, and Steve-O like swallowed a golf ball and then shot it out of his rectum. What? It was like a trick. He like had it up there already. Yeah, because also, no, choking. Yeah, I don't want to swallow. No, it wasn't a golf ball. It might have been a golf ball. That's crazy. I bet it was a golf ball. It was a ping pong ball, I think. Say again? Ping pong ball. Yes, that's right, because it made a funnier noise when it came out. It was three in the hand, it was two in the bush. Yeah, it was like, he had four hands in the bush.

55:41Yeah, yeah. It was like, ding, ding, ding. We're not recommending doing that. I have seen that show in Thailand. The famous, you hear this in all the Vietnam movies. I thought you were talking about the Jackass show on MTV. Me too. I was like, me too. What are you talking about? You know about the rich history of the GIs in Vietnam going on R &R in Thailand. And there were all these different brothels and all these things happening in Bangkok. And one of them is the ping pong ball show. I did not know this. You guys don't know about this? I don't know this either. No. Okay, so I'm on a family vacation with my mom, sister, and stepfather.

56:14And we're in Bangkok. So your aunt and uncle? Say what? Wait, you said your mom's sister. I said my mom, sister, and stepfather. His mom, his sister, and my mom's sister. I'm like, that's your aunt. Me and my aunt. She doesn't have a sister. We took in one. My mother knew the history completely. She knew the area of town we had to go to. Took in one. The show. Oh, took it in. Of the many feats that were performed, they shot a dart out and popped a balloon tape to the ceiling. Out of their butt. Out of their vagina. These are all out of their vagina. Okay. Have you heard it now? Is that ringing a bell?

56:49But I have seen a strip club show where a woman was shooting dollar bills out of her. OK, great. OK. And how far were they traveling? She was queefing them out. And it was like impressively far. Wow. It was like. We've cleaned it up. This episode. We have covered every orifice. I'm only bringing it up so that I can tell you how interesting it was at 19 or 20 to be sitting next to my stepdad. in this experience. No, no, no. Just he and I went in. My mom and sister had no desire to see it, but we were encouraged. You're here. This is a thing people see. You should see it. I wish it was the whole family.

57:31Me too. Me too. It's disappointing. I wish it was the whole family. I wish it was family bonding. That would have been nice. That would have been so nice. But my stepfather, who has since passed, was the sweetest, quietest man ever. He was an electrical engineer. year. And so we're watching this show. It's just a strange experience to be sitting next to your stepfather. And then, of course, they know I've got no money. They're ignoring me, but they're just crawling all over him and he doesn't know what to do. And I'm like, I'm trying to help. Yeah, you know, they're trying to get him to maybe go get a lap dance.

58:03He was getting full court press. Is that like the craziest situation you've ever been in with your stepfather or a parental figure? Got to be top of the list. I'd have to think about it. But yeah, my poor grandma, She hasn't seen anything like that with me, but me and my sisters have exposed her to so much like raunchy. We were playing back in the day when we were teenagers, like Cards Against Humanity with her. We had to teach her what Bukkake was. Sure, sure, sure, sure. How did that go? She was fine. I mean, she was just like annoyed that we were talking to her this way. We were like, well, it's like if a bunch of friends get together.

58:38Yeah, it's like how do you even describe that to a grandma? A bunch of colleagues. And she was just like, oh, my God, how dare you? How dare you talk like this? This is disgusting. She was, like, venting to me yesterday. And she called me and she, like, said the word fuck. And she, like, never does that. And she was, like, mid-vent. Very heavily venting. And then she stops herself midway. And she was like, I know I never say that word. And then just, like, kept going. She's a full engine. So fun. She's going to be 87 this year. Oh, wow. Good for her. She's on spry if she's on the phone with you dropping F-bombs.

59:09She's really spry. We play Mahjong together. Oh, I love Mahjong. Me too. Oh my God, we should play. Let's play. Yes, I would love to play. Right now, isn't it a long game? I would like to start right now. No, it's not that long. I mean, I could sit there for six hours and play. Oh my God, I could just play all day. Take a little quesadilla break, come back. Me and my mom had a little date with her best friend a few days ago that we did that. Play Mahjong fun. We played Mahjong. We sat in the sun, took a quesadilla break, came back. Yeah. I had an interview on like Zoom. I did that. I came back.

59:44Oh, it's the best. It was a great day. Yeah, great day. You know what? I've been having really nice girl dates lately. My sister took me out to dinner two nights ago. Where'd you go? Have you heard of Arby's? I love Arby's. Have you heard Tommy's Chili? Which, by the way, love. Yeah, me too. So good. On the fries. I've never had that. Tommy Burger? Uh-uh. Their chili moves in such a unique way. It comes out as a one solid thing. It's very gelatinous. Okay. Extremely. You tilt it out of the styrofoam cup and no residue. Interesting. Well, there's a little bit of oil left over in the styrofoam. That's it.

1:00:18That's it. Not a chunk in sight. Okay. I'm going to implore you to watch the movie Chips. We have a really nice scene at Tommy Burger. And I'm getting that chili all over my outfit. And it's just gooping. And as a lover of the chili, I think you'll appreciate that. I do love the chili. Okay. Practical magic. Oh, yes. Here we are. Speaking of sisterhood and sweet women. Girl dates. Girl dates and having dinner with my sister. I first need some backstory. So the original, the first Practical Magic came out in 1998 and it started Sandra Bullock and Nikki Kitty, Nicole Kidman. Nikki Kitty. This is your second movie with Nikki Kitty, yeah?

1:00:59This is my second movie with Nikki Kitty. So that movie, and I am not being critical. I just brought up chips. It didn't make any money, okay? But the movie made$65 million and it cost like$65 or$70 million. So it's an interesting. I'm shocked at that. And it was like critically panned. But it's a classic. No, it found its audience. That's the explanation I'm kind of looking for. Oh my God, it came out. Sandy and I were talking about this the other day, like how she was like saying that like it didn't do well. It really hurt them because they had so much fun making it. The reviews at the time were crazy.

1:01:28They would say things like, there's too many women in this movie. Like how many women do you need in one movie? How many women does it take to screw in a movie? And she was like, that was like every other article was saying like, it's too many women in one movie. Like it's so woman-y. And it was just so crazy to me thinking about that being a criticism and where we are today. Yeah. But just like had this massive life after it came out and it has this cult following. I am telling you, I have never been in something that people find out about where I've had more people say that they are begging for this.

1:02:03They're so excited to see that. This is like one of the biggest reactions I've had in my career. Yes, this is huge. It's so crazy. So, Mani, you're a huge fan. I'm of the gen. I'm the audience. I am the audience for this. You were 11 when it came out. I was 11. Or 10. You know, you were 11. But it's like the thing you watch at the sleepovers with your friends. Yes. And you do the dance. Lime and the coconut. Exactly. I mean, there's like scenes. There's quotes, the fashion, the aesthetic of it all, the ants. It is such an iconic movie in plot, in aesthetic, in sexiness. And so what's crazy is just how you were like 10 when it came out.

1:02:43I was not around yet. You were negative one. You were not even an embryo. Negative one. I was not even an embryo quite yet. So actually, so close. And, you know, my mom loved that movie. My sisters loved it. It's one of those movies that the women who are so excited to see it now, It's like spanning generations of a family. So this movie has just such a power. I was 10 when I saw it for the first time. Okay. And I loved this movie. And my mom was like, oh yeah, Practical Magic. Duh. Love that movie. I've already been there. And I was like, well, now I love that movie. She was like, great. We can rewatch it together all the time.

1:03:20It means so much to me and my sisters. It is so crazy to be here. In the sequel. In the sequel. Promoting this movie that you're now in. This many years after they made the first one, But like getting to be on set, watching Nicole and Sandra be Sally and Jilly, it's like so crazy. Stay tuned for more Armchair Expert, if you dare. This episode is supported by Helix. Okay, so summer's officially over, sad, and I'm trying to get back into a real routine. And honestly, the first thing I fix is my sleep because everything else falls apart when that's off. It's so true. And what I love about Helix is they have over 20 models, so you're not just guessing and hoping for the best.

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1:08:44Now, are you worried? Are you worried about this? This is so meaningful to so many people. It's so meaningful. There's like Devil Wears Prada too. It reminds me of that. And the same way that it's just like, oh my God, it better be so good. Like there's a lot of pressure. Of course. Also just like joining in as a new cast member. And I know that it's so exciting and there's so many feelings and my heart is racing about it because I just want to make people like proud. I want to make the fandom proud. I feel like this movie does absolute justice for a sequel. Like, I'm so, so pleased by how it turned out.

1:09:27It's so special. But you know what's also nice, too, is I think that when I was cast, like, how warm and welcoming everyone was was amazing. But also there was, understandably, from the fans of the movie, in the first movie, Evan Rachel Wood played Kylie, who's the character that I'm playing. And I think initially it was like very hard for audiences to kind of imagine that she and the original young woman who played Antonia weren't part of it. But we're following a very specific kind of age storyline of where the girls are in the books. The girls in the Book of Magic, you know, they're of a certain age.

1:10:01They're just like out of college. Yeah, they got to be discovering that they're witches, right? Totally. But luckily, she wished me well. She like said in an interview recently I saw where she was like, I wish Joey the best. And so like I reached out to her and that was like so sweet. And it was just like a really nice because like everyone was saying things online. And then I was like, well, what if we just chatted? And so that was really nice because it's just so noisy when people make their mind up about kind of like how to behave when they feel something about someone or a casting choice. I wish I could tell us what the actual percentage of the world who feels that way.

1:10:37Because I bet you it's like under half a percent. And I love Evan Rachel Wood. And so I was super touched when she like said that in her interview that she like wished us all well. And that was really nice because she didn't have to do that. And also, like you said, it's like I feel like the noise can become so much noisier than maybe it actually is. But it does feel that way sometimes. Yeah. Tell me about your relationship with Nikki Kitty. She's amazing. Also, just getting to work with her again. And as life brings you different challenges, then you work with people who are just so wise and smart.

1:11:11And same with Sandy. And you just get to have discussions with people that you respect, admire, not about the career that you have, but just about things in life that you just didn't expect to have to deal with. Normally, I hate this question interviews, but I do find myself genuinely curious right now. Were there any huge life hacks? They said, can you think of any moment where you're like, oh, I'm delighted I heard that? Well, like we interviewed Tom Pelfrey, right? And he's just so fucking brilliant on that task show. And he's talking about working with Mark Ruffalo. And he was shocked with how playful Mark Ruffalo is and how not serious he is between these takes that are very, very serious.

1:11:45He said to him, have you always been this way? And he said, no, I used to be like you. And he's like, what's that? And he's like, really intense. Yeah. And I just found it untenable. Like, I won't be able to do it forever if I'm doing it this. And like, that was a little bit of a breakthrough thing for him. I'm like, oh, wow, I can be that great, but I don't have to kill myself to be that great. We had Olivia Wild on and she said that Jennifer Garner once told her, I've been like thinking about this a lot, that Jennifer Garner told her once like, hey, the tabloids, like the culture casts you. They decide what your role is and that's your role forever.

1:12:21So to be like all agitated by it or try to fight it, they've already done it. And there's like acceptance mode around that. And I was like, that is brilliant. That's so interesting. Yeah. That's a really great way to like think about it. Yeah. Because that like brings me to like so many people I grew up seeing in the tabloids and like how their role was defined through like how the tabloids made us view them. Yes, exactly. It is decided. Like it's decided for you. Like, oh, this is the person who really wants to have a baby and never can. Yeah. And here's the person who can't keep a husband. This is the party girl.

1:12:58Exactly. This is the America's sweetheart. That's why big moments when people like Miley Cyrus are like, never mind what you said. I'm not that. That was such an amazing cultural moment. But I do feel like it is true in terms of I'm not at all as defined, I would say, as those people are as big at all as those names. But there's been just like a feeling that comes with a public perception and how that makes you feel. and if it should make you feel anything ever, especially how accessible it is to see what everyone says about you online. But now I'm just like, wait a minute, good or bad, whether they're saying really nice things, really mean things, really untrue things about my beliefs, whatever they're saying, my real life is great.

1:13:43It doesn't permeate that at all. You still get hired to do roles you love. I still get hired to do roles I love. I still have a really nice life at home. then I guess it really doesn't permeate my space. And like, it's true. Like it doesn't. So like, what does it matter? It's a soap opera that you're actually not living in. Well, that's why it's like when I read that stuff about like, what's going on with Joey? And she's got those marks on her neck. I'm like, oh, wow. This is such a simple thing for me. But now it's not a simple thing for certain people. I posted this TikTok yesterday, like, because I like hit my head really hard a few days ago because I was super excited to see my sister.

1:14:17She was picking me up. And I like looked out the window to see if she was there. and like I hit my head on the wall when I was like turning around and it was brain rattling hard. It's very tender to the touch, but I posted a TikTok about it. It's very tender to the touch. I posted a TikTok about it and like someone commented like, we'll find out what really happened next year. I'm like, what do you mean? Also, what? What? What does that even mean? So which is like so funny to me because I'm like, wow, I truly am living a simple life. What do you think the role is you've been cast in? I don't know if I have been yet.

1:14:48Yeah, I don't think you do, by the way. Not even yet. That's not a good word use. I don't know if I have been. I think that luckily we're less in that culture as we were. Like people aren't buying Star magazine anymore to see who looks terrible in a bikini. Well, again, there were four or five that were on the checkout stand. So it was very easy for the narrative to be controlled. So there's only four sources. No, literally. Now you have people's own social media accounts to counteract the narrative. Yeah, because they're like sharing what they see the world like, what they actually like and are interested in.

1:15:19My mom and I used to have when I was like nine and beyond, we used to have trashy magazine night and we would buy all four. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then we'd get like some snacks and ice cream. In case it'd be a break. We would knit and we would read. Oh, wow. And we would pass the magazines back and forth. And it was so fun. But I also just like remember what we were reading was so troubling at the time. Sure, sure, sure. But my favorite part was who wore it better. That was my favorite. I like stars are like us. Oh, stars are like us. Yeah, like someone's underwear is hanging out as they bend over at the gas pump.

1:15:50Yeah, someone's picking up their dog shit. Getting a parking ticket. It's upsetting. Oh, man, they are just like us. Oh, my. Look at that. They haven't transcended all the annoying parts of living. And then Maisie's in it. And we had her on and we adored her. She is such a sweetie pie. She's the nicest girl in the world. Were you a Game of Thrones fan? No, I've actually never seen it. Oh my lord. You have to watch it. I know. She has the coolest fucking role on that show. She became the star of that show. Yeah, she really did. I've seen so many clips of her from that show. You've got to watch the whole ride.

1:16:29No, I know. Are you scared? No, I was just when it came out. What year did that come out? 2011. 2011. No, 15 years ago. All right, so I was 11, 12. when they came out. Okay, you're a bit young. I wasn't interested in like the darker, dragon-y shows. Yeah, I get that. And then by the time I got curious about it, it was so many seasons in that I was like, am I really going to start this show? You should. Now it's one of those where I'm like, it's been so long since it came out that it actually needs to be watched now. In a way that's, I really love revisiting television that I'd never seen. I was too young when The Sopranos came out.

1:17:01I love The Sopranos. I love the Larry Sanders show, The Wire. It's time to watch Game of Thrones. The way I feel about you right now is that you have a lottery ticket at home. I know. That's worth like$10 million. And I'm like, oh my God, I can't believe she's got the thing sitting there. Okay, wait, that's a good feeling. Okay, that's a very good endorsement. When you get excited for someone else to see something for the first time. I'm like mad with jealousy right now. I would give anything to set fresh eyes. Let's do it. I just think she's so wonderful that I'm excited to just see my friends.

1:17:31Also, if you like her, she's such a rock star. And Chris and I regularly say like, Man, I can't wait till the girls get old enough that we get to rewatch that whole show again through their eyes. That's like my next best thing I have waiting. But it's like, come on, y 'all, let's get in the mood for this. Yeah, you're like, let's just get dark and dragon-y and sexy and kills and baby-y. It gets dark for sure. Oh, it's very dark. Very, very dark. My sister loves that show. Your sister has great taste. I know, I know. And was she so pumped that you were working with her? So pumped. Yeah, she's a bad motherfucker on that show.

1:18:02But Macy's just like the coolest girl. She's so nice. She's so chic. And she also has like the nicest speaking voice I've ever heard in my life. I could listen to her talk all day long. I just love hanging out with her. Yeah. I went to Savannah Bananas. One of the questions that the baseball player asked me is like, who's like the most down to earth star? And I was like, oh, wow. Racking my brain of who I think is down to earth. You know, that's kind of a tall order. Yeah. I feel like everyone I've ever interviewed and met. But boy, she is so fucking down to earth. I wish I would have thought of her when he asked me.

1:18:36Yeah. Like to try to go through everyone you knew. I just, of course, thought of the 20 people I know who are in the fucking stratosphere of Bizarroland. And I don't want to shit talk anymore. No, because of course you do. Anytime people ask me, like, who's the nicest, I immediately am like, who the man is? Yeah, exactly. I'm sorry, my brain went somewhere else. Yeah, right? I think I would say Elizabeth Moss. Oh, sure. Great pick. Great pick. Very down to her. Very cool. Coupled with her work, it's so disorienting in the funnest way. She's a playful, playful goofball. That's awesome. And I love her.

1:19:10Very smiley. We're doing the interview for A Handmaid's Tale and you're like, how are you doing that? I know. I know. She should just start laughing right after that six-minute close-up of her crying in agony. And then they yell cut and she's like immediately laughing. It's kind of like you with that show. With the act. So intense. I think there is a bit of like a, people always ask me like, did you take that show home with you after? And I was like, no. That would have been a strange one for you to take home with you. No, me like that was hard to shut at the end of the day. It's so heavy. I think it's like you got to separate your work and your life.

1:19:40I also really enjoy going to work. Even if a day is hard, I'm like doing something I really love to do. Well, the odds are that you'll be pretty proud of yourself after that hard day, right? It's like it'll be hard, but you'll be like, oh, I got through that scene that I wasn't, you know, I was scared about. I was thinking about that scene for a month. I'm going to sleep so good. It's going to be great. I feel fulfilled at the end of the day. That was a crazy thing when I like first felt fulfilled by working because I started so young. I was like nine years old when I was like, this is the most fulfilling thing in the world.

1:20:06So crazy. A little bit of an unfortunate release date. Yeah. For you to publicize. September 10th. Oh, we moved it. We moved it. Oh, good. Because I read. I was typing at the top of my notes today. And I was like, that's a bummer of a date to have to go around the country. Check out my movie on 9-11. Oh, well, I think you just. Yeah, I was going to say you say September 11th. But that's still not good. Nothing works. I was trying to think about how I'm going to say the date. I agree. I do agree. I was like, okay. And then I was like, well, it comes out. And then they changed it to like the 10th because it opens on the 10th.

1:20:40And I was like, perfect. That's much better. Thanks to everyone. But some people have birthdays on September 11th. My nephew. Okay. Oh, boy. My nephew is born on September 11th. He has to say it all the time. No, but Nikki Kidd, fabulous. Sandy Bowl, amazing. What's their advice? Give us one piece. They've been through so much themselves. And then me and my family were going through a bit of like a shakeup with familial health and kind of intense orchestration and logistics of how we take care of someone. And so that was really helpful to talk to people who have been through similar things, have had the life experience of that, and have also like been in the industry at the same time as doing those things.

1:21:19So like there was just a lot of genuine support in like the crevices of life that have nothing to do with the public eye and industry. So that was really nice because then I felt just like such a real connection of needing support, needing women and like them showing up. A little nurturing. So nurturing. I love to be nurtured. Yeah, good for you. Except not when you're in the bathroom. No. Puking. No, but other than that, I'm really good at asking for help. You are. That's good. I'm good at asking. I'm envious of that. Are you a Leo? I'm a Virgo. Okay. I don't know when the cusps are. It's close.

1:21:52Are you a Leo? I am. I love my birthday and I'm really good at asking for help. Yeah, this is great. I have a theory on this. I just launched it recently. I have certain people in my life who love their birthday and I have certain people that don't love their birthday. I'm one who doesn't necessarily love my birthday. When's your birthday? January 2nd. What I've concluded is it's the summer birthday people and it makes so much sense. Well, I hate the summer. Oh, you do? Oh my God. I hate the summer. This is a hot take. It is so oppressive. What a bitch. Well, that's the headline. She's a bitch.

1:22:27She hates summer. Joey's such a bitch. She hates summer. What do you hate about it? It's so goddamn hot. Okay. So what you hate is heat. Yeah, I really don't like it. I love winter. I love fall. And I also just feel like I grew up in L.A. Also, you don't know what the hell winter fall is. No, I do. You're saying that and someone in Michigan is like, you do not love winter. You love California. I do winters in Michigan. Oh, that's tough. Why? Because I work all over the world. She's a working actress. You've shot in Michigan? I've shot in Michigan. What did you shoot? I shot Oz the Great and Powerful there, and I shot a movie I did called The Lie.

1:23:00Oh, wow. Oh, no, that was in Canada. Wait, what else did you do? No, it was very close then. We neighbor. I shot a movie called Family Weekend in Michigan. I shot like three things in Michigan, actually. I love the winter because I don't deal with it annually. I dip in and out of winter. I know that I don't know what I'm talking about. But I love how romantic. It's so cute. And Christmas is better when you have some snow. Of course. But do you also know that the heat here is not real? Yeah, that's not even hot here. That you think it's hot, but it's not hot. No, I. It's coming September. It'll be hot.

1:23:34I know. It's not the same, though. It's not the same. Where are you thinking? I'm from Georgia. I love a Georgia heat. It's awful. But my skin looks so good. I have also spent four summers in Georgia. My goodness, you are a travel bug. And my skin looks really good when I spend the summers there. Some people, okay. Some people, I've heard this from other people too. They love humid areas because of their skin and their hair. I have the opposite. And also, L.A., you can't have, it's too dry. Like, Georgia is so nice because in Atlanta, it's summer, but you're living within so much greenery. It is green, which is nice.

1:24:07Because it won't catch on fire. Here, it's just, it's going to catch on fire. But trees may fall on your house. These are solid fucking points. You just got to get an arborist out there. You got to take care of those trees. We spent the whole summer in Nashville. Second summer in a row. It's very, very hot and very, very humid. But I'm with you. I'm sitting there on the screened-in porch and like the amount of life I can hear is almost deafening. It is really nice. Like all the buzzing. All the bugs and the frogs. Only if you have a screened-in porch, though. And the smell of a summer night in the South.

1:24:36I agree with you on that. The thing I kept flagging to my kids this summer is it would be windy, right? In L.A., you can't feel the wind because there's nothing in it there, right? There's no water in it. So it's not heavy. But like when you're walking in Nashville and the wind's blowing, it's like you can feel it moving through your hair. And you really get the sense of like, oh, I do live inside of something. I am surrounded by something. You don't have that feeling here. I completely agree. And I never thought of it like that with the wind having nothing in it. Because yesterday I was walking my dog and now I'm like putting it together.

1:25:06The way I get almost feral when I smell someone's sprinklers on hitting their grass. I seek that house out and I kind of just sit there for a minute and I sniff like my dog. I'm like. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I think what I'm craving is a bit of humidity. Yeah. I'm a smell fiend as well. I get very adjusted by smells. What about the smell of rice cooking? Well, that's a nice smell. Oh, that is nice. Yeah, that's comforting. That's a deep cut. I love when I can smell rice cooking. Wow. Did you grow up eating a lot of rice? She did four movies in Japan. She did four fulls. She spent six summers in Japan.

1:25:39No, my mom would make brisket and rice on special occasions and I could smell the rice. You know, it's funny. My parents made rice every day. It's an Indian cuisine in a rice cooker every day. So I was very against rice. Because you thought it was going to expose you. Yeah. Expose you to what? Being different. Being Indian and being different. Being brown as hell. Not exposing me to like a parasite or something. But then I had a friend over in second grade and she saw that my parents were eating rice and she was like, can I have some rice? Like she was so excited about rice and I was so confused.

1:26:15And I didn't know what to think. That's such a nice moment. I know, but it didn't permeate. I was still like, I don't trust it. She was impenetrable. Well, you know what? That makes a lot of sense. Before I stopped going to school, I went to school with kids who had Asian parents and things in their lunchbox to be so insecure about. It was so natural to be scared of what the other children would think. And some kids are like shitty. And they're just like, they pick on you for nothing. For your kimchi. Yes, for your kimchi. It's totally understandable to like want to conceal. You got off a little easier.

1:26:46No, there's a lot. Stop. There's so many smells. There's so many smells in Indian cuisine. Yeah, it's beautiful. It is my number one favorite cuisine. It's a great cuisine. Period. No flavors have ever been more exciting to me. Even in London, obviously. That's where I filmed this. Such amazing Indian food. Fuck, is it good? Oh, my God. It was constant. Yeah. I need them to open up. There's like three really famous ones. Dishoom? Yeah. They need to open that up here. I love Dishoom. Let's collect our... I got a little token at Dishoom last time I went that was a little like, show this to the waiter and you guys both get to flip it.

1:27:23And it was like a heads or tails thing. And if you call it, you're meals free. What? And I never got to use it after I got it because I didn't go back to Dishoom after that because I was almost done with the shoot. But you had called it? I still have it. You had called it? Or you get to do it then? I get to do it when I go back. That's exciting. I know. Let's go to Dushum. Yeah. I'm like dying to have. I think I'm going to order Indian food for dinner. I was just thinking the same thing. I know, but we don't have good Indian food here. It's good enough for me. Every crevice of LA has one. What do you like?

1:27:50Where should we order? I like Crown of India. Okay. I also like, back when I lived in Sherman Oaks, I like Indian Masala House. A lot of the places that I've discovered, it's just like you have to keep trying the places in the strip mall areas. Yeah, I know. Because you're going to find a good one. That's right. That's right. You just have to keep trying. Great advice. And I hope that's what everyone walks away with. Great advice. Keep trying. Keep trying. It's cool to try. Miss King, you're so fun. You can come back every day. You're so much fun to talk to. Practical Magic comes out September 10th.

1:28:2310th. I'm so excited. I'm so happy that you're so excited. I'm so excited. And it's always a joy to see the two of you. And I love the new set. Thank you. I haven't been here since. I know. And it's gorgeous. And it's always so fun to talk to you. Well, we'll certainly talk to you again. Yes. As this career moves on like the freight train that it is. That's right. Adore you. Adore you. Be well. Bye. Be well. He is an armchair expert, but he makes mistakes all the time. Thank God Monica's here. She's got to let him have the facts. Why does it smell in there? Rob says there was something in the trash that was stinky.

1:29:03It is stinky in here. What would you rate this? I think it's like a two and a half, yeah? Oh. There's something here, but it's not like I got to put my shirt over my nose. It's definitely trash. You know how you can just tell when it's trash? Yeah. It's trash. Can I tell you a passive aggressive thing I do on airplanes if I'm convinced the person next to me is farting? Yeah. Well, it's both survival and I do want them to see. Sure. I put my nose under my collar. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. And I keep it there. And I'm almost favoring them a tiny bit. Oh. So they know like, hey, man, look what I have to do.

1:29:45Wow. Do you have any moves if you're suspicious that your partner is farting? I'll do this. You rub your nose. Yeah, I like touch it. Do you ever wave the air? Like a cartoon. Yeah. I also vocalize too. I'll go, oh, wait, not that loud. That was an exaggeration. I'll go, oh, that loud. Yeah. I'm signaling like, it's not my fart because of course I wouldn't mind that. Okay. See, now this is where I'm shocked. I'm actually shocked that you have any passive aggressive moves about this because you fart on airplanes. Well, no, I'm very conscientious about it. Right. If I'll let a tiny bubble out, as you know.

1:30:27Ding, ding, ding. That comes up. Oh, it does. Oh, wow. That feels crazy. Yeah, I do a tiny bubble. Yeah. If you're going to picture like, you know, the size of nerds, those candies. Yeah. I let one nerd out. God. And then if I don't smell anything, then I let a blueberry out. Oh, it's incremental. It's incremental. and then if there's still nothing there then I might go for a ping pong size which is probably the whole thing. Okay yeah I was like that's huge. But if when I do my nerd. You have so much air in you. Me or everyone? You. Oh yeah I think I do have a lot of air. That is what you're talking about with some of my friends though I gotta say.

1:31:10Sure. Yeah I think if you had a balloon attached to your anus and you tooted it would definitely inflate it the size of a ping pong ball. Oh I see how you're measuring it. Yeah. Okay. That feels right. That's like, it just feels forceful to create a whole ping pong ball. Well, that feels like you gotta expel it, like, push it out. Right. Okay. Andre would take a fart. Now, you're saying they're not being conscientious enough, but if they had, you wouldn't be doing this? So then, I ain't even finished. If I let my nerd out and I'm like, oh gosh, I can kinda, that would be an issue at a blueberry or a ping pong ball.

1:31:46I then way I hold them as much as I can until I know my insides are going to explode. Then I go to the bathroom. Oh, yeah. And then I have a whole system in there or I let it out and then I flush because when you flush, there's a real vacuum effect. It sucks all the air in that little box. This is back when I used to smoke on airplanes illegally. You could this is how I would do it. And so I'm trying to get it out of the toilet as well. And then I'll wait for a second because I'm so self-conscious if I open the door and there's this. A waft. Well, specifically if there's a flight attendant standing right there.

1:32:19Oh, shit. Yeah. Now, are you sitting for the farts in the toilet? No. In the bathroom? You're standing. Yeah, standing. And are you leaning over a little? Well, I'm always leaning over because I'm too tall for the bathroom on an airplane. Oh, shit. Okay. Yeah. To the degree that for me to pee, because if you can picture it, it's concave and it's getting, you know, the closer you get to the bowl, the less height you have. Uh-huh. So I'm often, when I pee, I'm like reverse arc. Oh, your back bent. To get my genitalia close to the toilet, yet my head will not fit there. Oh, wow. Okay. Yeah. It's, there's a lot of privileges with the height.

1:33:04This is one of the times where it's not terribly advantageous. So you're just standing up and farting. There's no. Yeah, I do stand up fart. And then I, the second I think it's all out, then I hit, because you only get one flush. Because if you flush a second time now and the flight attendants out there, it's like, what's going on in there? He put a boot in the toilet. I've had to do that. Because it wasn't, it was too big. No, I just was too scared that there, I mean, these are emergency situations. I barely even pee on planes. Okay. But a few times, oh, God, why do we do this? Why are we like this?

1:33:40You've had some number twos on planes? Rarely. Yeah, yeah. But it's happened, and it's an emergency. Water balloon. Yeah. Yeah. And in that case, I am so self-conscious. Yeah. But more about the wafting, not about talking to anyone. I want you to, because I want to see the physiology on your body. So you're in there. Yeah. You have a water balloon. Yeah. You're demoralized. Second flush. You know it's still bad. And then you now know you're in there too long. Right. And you hear a gentle nod. Oh, okay. Yeah, I'm in here. Yeah, but we already heard it flush twice. Like, you know, you've got no choice now but to exit.

1:34:23I just wanted, like, I really want you to be in that moment. So you flush twice. Now you're biding your time and then it's just a little. Yeah. I'm not coming You're not gonna come out You know someone's standing there And they know you flushed twice And you're gonna I would just say I will still say like Oh I'm in here Like I'm in here Yeah yeah I'm busy I'm in here I have work to do What if they say Okay then if they say Why don't you I'm trying to get to the punchline Of what I want this experiment to be I know you're always Okay You open the door And Taryn Eggerton is standing Stop Jesus Christ can you imagine and he goes oh Monica I'm like no I'm not who are you talking about you fucking racist because I'm Indian oh you think I'm Monica Padman she would never do what I just did in there she's flawless you should call her don't worry about her hair on that episode I'm in here doesn't that ever happen to you when like sometimes that happens at like a restaurant or something they think it's open and then they're trying to come in and i'm like i'm in here i do say i'm in here you say i'm in here i i try to have a bit of fun with it or sometimes i'm in the mood to have a bit of fun with it and then so it's like hi oh yeah that's so weird right to hear that it's almost inviting yeah yeah that's scary but that's good the other person then feels like oh hi oh sorry hi how are you where are you flying i've been better i try not to do this on airplanes oh god it's awful kristen was at a hotel last night because of the emmys oh she stayed at the hotel yes i urged her strongly begged her to stay at the hotel like take a fucking break and Get a good night's sleep.

1:36:24Okay, cool. I wonder, okay, I'm glad you cleared that up. I wondered that because she posted a picture of her in her beautiful dress at three, before they left for the Emmy's, like, ready. Okay. And it said 3, 10 p.m. And then it said, like, 8, 10 p.m. And she was in her pajamas. But I was like, where is she? Ah, uh-huh. Yeah, she was at a hotel. So we had a lovely night. Last night, the girls and I, we watched Mayday. Have you watched it? No. Is it a TV show? It's on Apple TV. It's a movie with Ryan Reynolds. I can't imagine you haven't seen it advertised. As soon as you open up Apple, it's generally.

1:37:00Okay. I'm not very observant. Him and Kenneth Branagh. Oh. Am I saying that right? The last name? Yeah, I think so. It scares me. He's, by the way, Kenneth Branagh, if that's how you say it, is. Legend. He's so exceptional. Yeah. He's a great director. I love all those Mystery on the Nile, whatever they're all called, right? That series, Agatha Christie series. Oh, yeah. Anyways, great movie. Um, boy, they watch them step up like Lincoln becomes mom. She cooks dinner for her and Delta. They cleaned up really well. It was perfect. Yeah. Walked out to the school. And then I got, I'm like, yeah, fuck it.

1:37:37Let's go. Let's keep the momentum. I go on a hike. And then I walked by your house and then I immediately see our lovely neighbor, Guillermo. And he has a, well, I don't see him. I just see he has a vehicle I really want. And then I do this thing. Every time I walk by the vehicle, I go like, OK, how do I plant a seed to him? Hey, whenever you're going to move on from that vehicle, because my hunch is he's going to dump it. Right. Like it's going to be so inconvenient to try to sell it. Once again, people coming over to his house and everything. So now I'm trying to think of a way that I can somehow get this maybe at a 10 percent discount.

1:38:10I have his phone number. Me too. Then why don't you just text him and say, hey, I always walk by and I think of how I will formulate. What is the best way to roll this out? Okay, this is what I would say. Hey, this is Dax, your neighbor. Hey, we've met. This is going to sound crazy. But if you're ever looking to get rid of dump your fill in the blank car, I know what it is. 1987 Chevette. I'm your guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And smiley face. Let me know. I love you. I'm going to take this package. I want this. Do you remember that's a callback? I don't remember that. When I was at Walgreens and I just, I was panicked about getting to the airport.

1:38:56I forgot. I just said, I love you. I'm going to take this. I did forget that. That could be another thing we could work out maybe is we could do a fake stealing. He could report it stolen, get full value. I'll also kick him a little cash. You just ruined it. I did. Okay. Speaking of that, I'm watching Bloodline. Oh, that's a blast from the past. Kyle Chandler. Yes. So I know I didn't know. I thought that was like some sort of procedural show. Oh, it's a little bit like in my memory. It is the full drama version of Black of I'm on the show. Bad Monkey. Right. It's down in the Keys. Yeah. It's like a little bit underbelly scene.

1:39:38Yeah. Yeah. It's about a family. But the reason I started that is because I started watching Lanterns. Are you watching Lanterns? Is it great? It's great. Oh, good. It's really, really good. I'm very into it. Rob wants to say something. I've been watching that too. You love that? Yeah. Lanterns is great. It's so good. Okay. I love Chandler. I just love him so much. He's so good. Oh, yeah. Surprise, surprise. I mean, I know he's so good, but it's just one of those things that you like you you kind of forget. And then you see him and you're like, God, he's such a good actor. I saw this very endearing clip of him talking about his scene that he had in Wolf of Wall Street, which he's like he's in a Scorsese movie.

1:40:24His first scene is with Leonardo DiCaprio on a boat. and he was talking about how his first couple times he did it he was being kind of aggressive and mean and he's like and i you know i can i can tell this isn't it this isn't it and i'm starting to like spin a little bit and and then between takes like leo pulled me aside and like he just we just chatted about it and and in the process of talking to him i realized like oh no man this is so fun for me I got this guy like this is a blast this isn't angry it's like I finally got this motherfucker I'm gonna you know and then um and then they do it it's the thing that's in the movie and he was just um so complimentary about how generous Leo was that's nice yeah because that's a stressful sitch big time you know it's so it's acting so weird because Kyle Chan like when you're telling me this story and I love Leo you know I love him yeah how could you not I love him.

1:41:23Yeah. But, you know, acting's so subjective. And I'm like, yeah, Kyle Chandler, of course, should be doing a scene with Leonardo DiCaprio. Like, he is as good as him. Right. It's just the world of, like, fame and celebrity and leading men and TV versus movies. It, like, creates all these weird illusions. Also, Kyle is exceptional. He's way, way better of an actor than I am. Also, Leo is better than him. Leo is one of the absolute greats of all time. I know, but see, this is what, I don't know if that's true. And I'm, this is all real time. I've never like been like, oh yeah, like he's, I agree with you.

1:42:07I think he's an insane actor. He's Jack Nicholson. He's like our Jack Nicholson. But I think there are a lot of TV actors that are phenomenal, would be phenomenal film actors. Oh, yeah. Kyle being one of them. Yeah. They just don't really get that opportunity for reasons having nothing to do with their acting. Sure. And it's just interesting to me. It is. And I want to be clear. I think Kyle is at 100%. You got to watch Lanterns. But also, I think Leo is a once in 40 year actor. And I think this is a fun way to think about it. I think what's confusing, like when you, I've been starting to think about this way, when I'm trying to evaluate or maybe explain why Max Verstappen's so special.

1:42:55If you're just to watch qualifying, you'll go, oh, wow. You can kind of figure out how good Max is. But even if the cars are dead equal, if his teammates in the same car, you know, him being better is probably a tenth of a second better. And you go, well, that's not that massive. And it's not on its own. But now you add up, there's 62 laps. Now there's this other huge component on the table. How consistently is Max at his best? And Max somehow, although he might only be a tenth of a second better on one lap, his consistency is a couple standard deviations above everyone else. So now this gets cumulative.

1:43:36This tiny margin gets really large because of his consistency. And I would say that about Leo. There's no performance that is not insanely memorable and is almost like the top of his career every time out. Right. But OK, so Kyle's just been like really good and serviceable on a couple of things and then like outrageously exceptional on something. Well, this is where things get a little tricky, though, because he has the material. Exactly. He's in the position. I mean, this is a ding, ding, ding for a couple episodes from now expert about leaders and how a good leader comes to be. And a lot of that has to do with factors outside of their own timing, place.

1:44:24Who's he working with? Right. So when we talk about Leo, it's like, yeah, at this point, like he is going to be unreal and everything because he's working with the very best people. He has the agency to say, like, I'm not doing that. Like, even if it's, you know what I mean? Like he gets to say no. And Max has always a really good car. But additionally, it is it is Leo's impossible. It's impossible. Like, each time it's different, each time he hits the mark. I want to be clear. I love him. Yeah. I mean, he's just really special. He is. And I feel this way. I mean, we've talked about this. I feel this way about Kristen.

1:45:04Like, her and Kyle Chandler, I feel like, almost are in this similar category where they're so good that you almost don't notice. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's not terribly flashy. exactly because it's so natural and and like charming and i i don't know i i don't know but i acting's weird again i'll put kristen in that like the consistency of kristen is outrageous yeah like it's just it's a crazy consistency i'm you know i'm i'm a bit up and down i've had some really i think really good performances i've had some that are like they're fine but a couple not so goods, you know, I feel like I more need the right thing or I need the right leeway or, you know, I need some things.

1:45:51Right. Yeah. Yeah. Not Kyle. You put him in anything, he's going to be, you know, he's going to be absolutely fantastic. He's playing Green Lantern, for goodness sakes. It's really good. Can't wait to watch it. Yeah, you should watch it. But then, yeah, so then I was like, oh, I miss him. I miss Coach. Yeah. I was like, maybe I'll rewatch Friday Night Lights. Could I recommend? Yes. But then Bloodline popped up and I was like, oh, I've never seen this. So then I started. So I've been up late. You can feel the humidity in the show. You really, really can. Which is cool. Yeah. I'm almost done with season one.

1:46:25I really want to know. We're on episode three of Furious. Oh, I told you. I can't believe how great it is. It's a perfect show. Who is the lead actress in it? Emmy Rossum. Other than Emmy. Oh yeah What's her name? Lola Pettigrew She's a phenom I know she's incredible She's incredible My god is she exciting to watch Can you believe that is Liz Merriweather? Can you believe it? I need to send her a text I know she's just being inundated You know like when you get the avalanche of that But I still need to Everyone just a reminder Dax worked for Liz Bless this mess It's totally a lot different than Bless This Mass.

1:47:10And New Girl. Like, I cannot believe. And I'm like a, I think New Girl is one of the best TV comedies. It's so good. I think she's so good. And I cannot believe she wrote that and this. They are so different. Yeah. And this show is, wait till you finish. I mean, my God. Okay, great. Yeah, she's like a Juno Temple kind of pop off the screen discovery. Oh, the furious actor. Yeah. All of the acting in that show is really insanely good. The other cop is, I mean, all the cops are great. Yeah. Jake Lacey. Like, it's a highly recommend show. It is dark. I know a few people who were like, I can't watch it.

1:47:57Too much for them. A little much for them. Yeah. Rossum's hair, though. Yeah, she has great hair. Whoa. She has great hair. What a hair. She has great hair. My God. And she's incredible. She should have been one of the mermaids. In my commercial? Yep. Yep. That was short-sighted on their part. Well, I probably would have been recast. No, you would have been in. You had the best hair in the commercial. Thank you. Well, one of them was definitely cast because her face. Like, she's, well, both of them are gorgeous. But one of them looks like a mermaid. Like, she looks like not of this planet. Yeah, sure.

1:48:36She looks aquatic. And then she was cast in Westwood after that. Okay. So I didn't watch that show, but I assume. Did she play an aquatic in that one? I think she played a non-person. Oh, right. Aren't people not? Yeah, middle. There they are. Yeah. You can't really see her face, but her eyes are like. I mean, Monica, you can see objectively your hair is the most banging, right? No. Yeah, for sure. I don't want to do that. Rob? Yeah, I think that's the best hair on that. Yeah, absolutely. You have more action going. Everyone's got more volume than any human should have. That's already like, how the fuck does everyone have this much volume?

1:49:11That's what the product does. But some of the other volume looks a little blown out volume. Yours looks like, oh, no, there's pieces in that volume. Those shells were glued to my boobs. You know what? This is a testament to your hair. I hadn't even noticed you had shell. Yeah, yeah. That's definitely a testament to the hair. Yeah. No clue. Well, they were glued. Okay. everyone had glued yep okay great and then those suits once you got in the suit you couldn't get out of the suit so you couldn't pee you couldn't do anything and you just pee in the water or was there really no water involved there was water but that was at the end of the like the shoot itself was at the end it's like very and the first part was on a rock it was a 17 hour day in a 19-hour day.

1:49:55Wow. Well, it paid off. Paid off. It paid the bills, too. Everyone put in the work and it shows. Stay tuned for more Armchair Expert, if you dare. Confidence. It's listening to your gut. It's moving forward, even when the path ahead is unclear. For nearly 160 years, Pacific Life has helped people keep their promises. building confidence for generations. Whether you're confident in your financial future or just beginning to envision it, we're here to help. Ask a financial professional how. Pacific Life, the power of a promise. Pacific Life Insurance Company, Omaha, Nebraska. And in New York, Pacific Life and Annuity, Phoenix, Arizona.

1:50:47Speaking of me and my looks. Yeah. I have a big bruise on my chin. It's covered. It's covered right now. You probably can see a little bit. It's poking out. Can't see it. But people might see it on some episodes. Okay. It's from filler. Okay. I'm happy to say that. Yeah, great. It's chin filler. I had chin filler before. I've talked about that, but it faded. That was a couple years ago. So I got a little re-up. Topped off the tank. Yeah, nice. And I bruised. Well, you know, you got to pay. It's funny because the first time it didn't bruise. And so I was really arrogant about it because he told me, he was like, you know, do this and this.

1:51:33Be careful, like, for bruising. He's like, did you bruise last time? I said, no. Yeah, I don't bruise. Yeah. And I should have known better because I've been getting a lot of bruises lately. I don't fart. I don't bruise. I don't pee. I don't do anything. I'm not sure I'm alive. I do bruise now. Okay. Congratulations. Okay. So I'm a real girl. And I, yeah. And it's been like a lot of days and it's fading, but it's still there. Okay. And then of course, so I was talking to my family this weekend. First, my brother on FaceTime, you know, we're like, he's telling me the story and it's kind of like intense.

1:52:10And then he's like, what's wrong with your chin? I was like, oh. Yeah. Sibling. Yeah, exactly. And I was like, oh. And he's like, did you fall? Did you fart? And then I, yeah, exactly. Did you fart so hard that you broke all the blood vessels? You're disgusting. Like you're, yeah. Siblings will really let you know. Yeah. And I was like, it's filler. And I didn't even want to explain, you know, I was like, and he was like, okay. And then you just moved on with this story. Oh, good. Good. And then again, when I talked to my parents, you know, obviously the same thing. Their reaction is less. They're more judgmental.

1:52:39Yeah. They're like, yeah, well, listen. Hey, I'm on here on these streets. I learned something. I don't know if this is like bad to say. Okay. But so my cousin was visiting. Your parents? Yeah, was visiting my parents and my brother and the baby. And so she was on FaceTime as well. And so she also noted the filler. And then she was like, Monica, you don't need to do that. And I was like, whatever. And then she's like, well, she's my cousin is the daughter of my aunt who drowned last year. Yes, who passed. And and she said, well, she's gone now. so I guess I can spill her secrets. She had a chin implant.

1:53:22Nice. I know. There you go. And then I felt so like in touch with the universe. I was like, yes. You guys are very, it's just another thing that you're similar in. She, you know, I share her name, my middle name. I'm named after her. You're both weak swimmers. Oh. I'm sorry. Not enough time. Okay.

1:53:53oh yeah apparently just the right amount of time because you're like it's that's good laugh or you're scared yeah I'm scared but it's true um no but she thought she had a weak chin like me uh-huh it's like we both we both like took things into our own hands you know well you know I think there's you're in a tricky situation when you find out somebody they go like hey I'm gonna get a nose job or I just got a no job or whatever it is. I think your impulse is to let them know that you think they look great. Right. Like if you're you want to comfort them and alleviate like you don't need to do that.

1:54:29Like, but it can feel very judgmental. Oh, that that that statement. I think if you're if you're nervous, people are going to be judgmental. Let you're too vain or whatever your thing is, this act of kind of trying to be compassionate can get read as judgment. It is so dependent on who's saying it. Yeah. It is solely dependent on that. I know my parents aren't like, no, you're so pretty without it. They're just like, ugh, like, don't. You don't need to do that. Yeah, yeah, exactly. But then they also don't really care either. Yeah, yeah. And then there are people in my life who would say like, you didn't need to do that.

1:55:14That I believe are, they're giving me a compliment. Like they really are giving me a compliment. I don't feel judged like I'm vain. I'm not by too many people. Because I'm really not. Like I don't like my face, but that is just what it is. So I don't. And I like shopping, but I don't think that's vain. Is it? Maybe some people would say it is. Shopping or your face? All of it, I guess. But everything in one package? Yeah. Okay. No one's unaware of their face. Like you're lying. You're lying. If you're saying when you look in the mirror, you're not like taking in what you're looking at. I mean, if you're then obsessing about it and then like, you know, I, if I were really vain, I would be doing hair and makeup before this every day.

1:56:08It's funny you'd say that because I saw a comment that said Dax wears eyeliner. No. And I wrote no, but also wouldn't it be crazy if I'm not wearing makeup? I don't do my hair yet. I'm putting eyeliner on. I mean, just on prima facie on the surface. I've picked a very weird thing to spend a lot of time on. Maybe they think you're trying to look punk. Okay. Goth. Yeah. Goth. But I was never goth, but still I've not ever applied eyeliner, but it seems tedious. It's not the easiest thing to apply. It'd be easier to do my hair. Right. And like, if I'm trying to look better, if I just did my hair, that would be, yeah.

1:56:50more time efficient. It's obvious that we aren't putting in very much effort when we come and stay here. Look wise. Well, we can't. We can't. We can't. There's not enough time. Exactly. Look, like at first when we started video, I was like, oh, okay, I'm going to have to. And then can't. We do this too often. You know, I think it's healthy ultimately. Like there's not enough time. It forces you to not care. I agree. So the whole point of what I'm saying is I really just don't think I'm vain. People would get up an hour early and like, I have not brushed my hair this year in a year. Like somebody else is doing my hair for an event.

1:57:30Exactly. Um, and that's just, that's fine. So I guess I like the circles back to the thing you talk about all the time. I'm not insecure about being vain. Right. So if somebody was like, oh, they're vain. I'd be like, oh, you just like really don't know me. Yeah. Or also, okay. Like There's another level of it, which is like, I can accept by your definition, I'm that thing. Yeah. And that's fine. I have a different definition. I'm not even trying to argue you out of your definition, right? Like when people call me a misogynist sometimes, and I'm like, okay, you have a definition of misogynist that's different than mine.

1:58:06Right. Obviously, I don't think I'm a misogynist. Yeah. But whatever. Well, part of it is like, I guess I don't even, on the scale of things I think are bad. Vanity is not high up on the list for me. Like even on other people too. Of the seven deadly sins. Yeah. Of the movie Seven, our favorite movie. You put it at seventh. Okay. Let's go over them. This is fun. Vanity. Vanity. Greed. Greed. Sloth. Lust. Lust. Vengeance. Vengeance. And don't tell us, Rob. I want to get it. Okay. Okay, but Gluttony. Mm-hmm. And. Envy or jealousy? Did we say that or no? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Because that was him, right?

1:58:56He envied Brad Pitt. Ah! So scary! Oh, my God. What a movie. Yeah, I put Vandy at the bottom of that list. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Who cares? Yeah. Because it only affects the person. Correct. So who cares? That's right. How would you rank them? What's the worst one, do you think?

1:59:18I've already forgotten the whole list. Lust, greed. Also, lust is low for me. I'd be dead without lust. Like, that's my fuel system. Hey, you're like, that's a virtue. Yes, exactly. That's one of my virtues. I'm lusty for everything, for life, for food, for adventure. Pride. Excessive belief in one's own abilities or importance. Okay, that's a virtue. Not the importance part. Well, yeah, I think this is a good list because it's saying the negative. It is saying the negative parts of it. Because obviously there are good things about some of these. So excessive belief in one's own abilities or importance.

1:59:53Greed. A strong selfish desire for wealth or goods. Lust. An intense or unbridled craving for sexual pleasure. Yeah. Envy. Guilty. Envy. Sadness or jealousy regarding another person's traits or successes. Don't suffer from that. Gluttony. Overindulging in food, drink, or other items. Wrath. Uncontrolled feelings of anger. hatred or rage, sloth, laziness, apathy, or failure to act when you should. Yeah, I would not want to suffer from sloth the most. I probably don't want wrath around me the most, like in someone else. Right. Wrath or envy. Oh, so vanity is pride then? It must be. In Seven, he cut off her nose, right?

2:00:37Despite her face. And I felt like they... They're making it sound like she was obsessed. But maybe he wrote Pride and Blood, maybe? He must have. Oh, it's such a good. Yeah, I got to give it a rewatch. I know. That's what that means. Now in my house, I have put up some art, you know, and some paintings. And I think all the time, like a lot about the scene in that movie for that sin where he turns the painting upside down. And that's how they discover. They're like, oh, in this picture, this painting's upside down. So then they take the painting off. And so I am always thinking about turning a painting upside down as a clue.

2:01:16Yeah. It's one mortal sin. Yeah. I think the worst one's wrath. I mean, it's like kind of the most obvious worst one. I think it's really specific to you. So like, of course, wrath doesn't bother me so much because I feel equipped to deal with wrath. If that makes sense. Of other people? Yeah, like if someone else is rageful around me, I'm okay in that situation. Right. If someone is like envious of me and they wish me ill and we're friends, I don't know what to do with that. I don't know how to defend myself against that. Yep. Yeah. Again, I don't know how sloth or gluttony affects me, like if someone else has it.

2:02:03Right. Well, yeah, that's true. Like they're just on their own little slow mission. That's why wrath to me has the most outward and envy. You're right. Wrath and envy probably have the most outward impact. Yeah. Maybe lust if it's like raping. I think this is kind of like lust is supposed to be rapey. Okay. You know, maybe. Yeah, rapey's bad. We could agree on that. Yeah. But back to envy. I think people, I think everyone has experienced this. Greed is pretty – greed out of control can be very bad, but go on. Yeah, I think if you are stuck in a greed cycle, it's very bad for you. Well, yeah. Yeah.

2:02:46Right? Okay, but envy, like even – this happens a lot between friends. Like there's two friends. They both like the same person, whether it's even expressed or not. Uh-huh. And then one person gets that person. And the dynamic that happens almost without anyone's control is the person who didn't get them. There's a new lens over their eyes when they look at their friend. Sure. I mean, I think that's very human. Yeah. Like all these are, right? They're all like. Well, of course. Yeah, yeah. Maybe part of it is you see. Well, yes. I mean, obviously you see a lot of things. You see the things about them that you don't have, obviously.

2:03:32I mean, in this case, it's a good case because it's literally you or them. Uh-huh. And yeah. And it's you as your person. They have the thing you want. I think it's actually less about that middle person that people like than it is about the feeling it brings up in you, right? Where it's inadequate. Ultimately, it's inadequacy. and then you have a direct person to look at to say like, okay, they have this, I don't have this. They have, I have this bad thing, they have this good thing. Or, and, you're like, well, they have all this bad stuff, so why would they get picked? You just go down the list.

2:04:16I think what envy creates is the end of empathy and compassion towards that person. So it's like once your friend has this girl or boy that you want more than anything, you're really now incapable of feeling bad for them about anything. Because like, yeah, but they have the thing I want. Like whatever they're going through, I'd be happy to go through that to have the thing I want. So you can't really feel bad for them. I think it's very like human nature. I don't know. I think it probably depends on the scenario. You hear it all the time. It's like, well, who cares? They're rich, right? It's like, well, who cares?

2:04:54They're rich. Right. That's crazy. But that's not a friend. That often happens. But that is an example of lack of empathy where it's like, I mean, I'm incapable of acknowledging this person has some discomfort or unpleasantness because they're rich. Who cares? Right. A lot of people do feel like who cares, but they're famous. Who cares? Or they're beautiful. Who cares? Or a lot of people do feel that way. Oh, boo hoo. She's beautiful. I know. But that's yeah, that's envy. I know. I mean, that's part of when I'm listening to pop culture podcasts and that like it's all this negative take on people in the zeitgeist.

2:05:36Right. And I think the rationale is, yeah, duh, they're famous or they're this. So like, it's OK. to talk negatively about them. Well, anytime Boohoo follows anything, that's your clue of like what they have that you now are incapable of empathy. Right, so, but that's so, I hate that. Like, I'm always like, they're a person. Like at the end of the day, what do you mean? Like, yeah, yeah. But I experience it, you know? Like I am aware of when I'm doing it. Mm hmm. Or it's just like, you know, well, boo hoo. It's they still have one hundred billion dollars or boo hoo. But it's like, yeah, if they're complaining about.

2:06:26Not having enough money and they have one hundred billion dollars, then you could say boo hoo. What I'm saying is if if if Jeff Bezos fell down a staircase very publicly and broke his femur. Yeah. I think the general reaction would be like, well, boo hoo, he still got one hundred billion dollars. That's crazy. I think that would be the standard reaction, though. Because you'd go like, yeah, I'd break my femur to have 100. But you start doing all this math, that makes no sense. Yes, it doesn't. That's envy. Like, none of it makes any sense. Then I think envy is the worst one, then. That's what I was saying.

2:06:59I think it kills compassion. Yeah. And it kills empathy. But wrath does, too. Anger does, too. Unbridled anger is... Yeah, where you want to hurt somebody. Yeah, but you also, it warps reality. You can't see reality clearly in the way that you probably can't if you're envious. Right. All right, well, that was great. Yeah, what a good detour. Want to do some facts? Yeah, I do. This is for Joey. I love her. Yeah, she's fantastic. I love her. She's so fun. She's a fun gal. Okay, she was right about our outfits from last time. No way. Yep, that I wore a yellow skirt and a yellow sweater and you wore God's true cashmere.

2:07:45Okay, are pennies being taken out of circulation? Yes. Oh, thank God. The U.S. government stopped producing new pennies, but existing pennies remain legal tender and are gradually phasing out of everyday circulation. Now, this is interesting because what if the penny now becomes worth? A fortune? Yeah. There's too many. There's not finite enough. I'm keeping mine. Good. Give me my pennies. They're worth more as a metal than they are as their currency value. Yeah. They costed more to produce than they're worth. Not a great model. You said that Kristen said a thousand paper cuts sinks the ship. Yeah.

2:08:32Sometimes a thousand paper cuts sinks the ship. Yes. And we do know it's death by a thousand paper cuts is the correct. Or loose lips sink ships. Oh, she's combining. Sure, of course. I think that's generally what's happening is people are weaving together a couple different cliches. I like death by a thousand paper cuts because that one makes very clear sense. Yes. You know? Yeah. Okay, so I looked up some common idioms and meanings. Okay. A piece of cake. That's easy. Yeah, but I still don't always understand. It's like, okay, it's something very easy to do. Why is a piece of cake easy to do?

2:09:11It's very easy to eat a piece of cake. To eat? Not to make? No, not to make at all. Okay, so it's just like it's as easy as eating it. No one, you have to twist a kid's arm to eat a slice of cake or anybody's arm. Okay, break the ice. We know that means make people more comfortable. Why? That's a good ice breaker. Maybe because it's like. They're frozen. They're hardened. and you free them from this shell of ice yeah okay great right um cost an arm and a leg just that that would be a lot yeah um do you remember sedaris's joke oh okay he you know he gathers jokes he asked people tell him jokes one of the jokes was um god came to adam and he said, I can make you the most beautiful mate.

2:09:59She will be super smart and super capable and very loving and very nurturing. And it's going to cost you an eye, one kidney and your right leg. Okay. And then Adam said, what can I get for a rib? I don't get it. Do you know that Eve was made from one of Adam's ribs? Oh, so it's saying Eve sucks. That he didn't want to give up that much. He's like, well, what can I get for a rib? That's what we got with you. Oh, that's funny. Pretty funny joke. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Did you get a little mad for a second? Mad? No. Oh, okay. Should I be mad? No, I just, I thought you were offended for a second. I don't even really see why I'd be offended.

2:10:44Maybe I don't get it. Okay. Oh, because like all, because women come from Eve, so Eve sucks. Well, no, just if there was this amazing Eve offered, but it was going to cost him an eye, a kidney and a leg. And then he's like, well, what can I get for a rib? I mean, that's what I. Yeah, I get it. That's a lot to give up. Yeah. I don't think I'd give that up for a partner. No. Any partner. You shouldn't. No. Wow. This was just asked to, oh, Eric and Charlie and I were talking and Eric said, in school, if a girl liked you, did you like her back or did you tend to only like the girls that didn't like you?

2:11:26Because Eric was admitting that was kind of his thing. And I said, no, I liked everyone that liked me, liked me. Yeah, it's a good quality. Yeah, like I know I like it. Charlie's like same. Anyone who liked me, I liked. That's great. Pretty much. But this is that. You'd be fine with whatever. That's the point of that. You're fine with whatever. Yeah. But also it's like, no, it shouldn't cost you your own like personhood to have a partner. That's sort of my take on it. Okay, great. Yeah. We've both run it through our filters. That makes sense what you're saying. And now under the weather, it's like, why?

2:12:05Because it's sunny out and so you're feeling gloomy. But gloomy is sickness. Generally, weather is, when people go, there's weather. I think they're talking about rain generally or snow or wind. So if you're under a cloud, basically, is what they're saying. Oh, a cloud. Yeah, like, oh, there's weather. Sunny, I don't know why, but sunny and no clouds in the sky is not weather. It is to me. Sure. California weather. Yeah. Okay, let the cat out of the bag is interesting because obviously it's like, you know, secrets are being spilled. Uh-huh. But like, why is a cat? First of all, why is he in a bag?

2:12:41Yeah, why are you hiding a cat? Yeah. In a bag. Yep. That's animal. Oh, God. Did you see? Uh-oh. Did you see a fashion show recently, a couple days ago? PETA, like, infiltrated. And then they were, like, walking down the runway, like, screaming. And then it was. They're unhinged. I was like, look. You are not doing your cause any favors. All it does is make me feel like you guys are crazy and weird. And I have no. Yeah. I have no compassion for you. Self-indulgent. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, I hated that. Yeah. Anyway, let the cat out of the bag. Yeah, I don't. I don't know why cat resembles secret. Well, they are like sneaky.

2:13:31Well, maybe like I'm just really spinning a yarn now. Yeah. What if, like, historically cats weren't allowed in the castle? And so if you wanted your cat, you had to smuggle it in a bag. It was a secret. Yeah, and now the cat's out of the bag and we're in trouble. Like, perhaps, because people think cats are spooky, maybe there's some history of, like, we don't want cats around. Do you want to know what it says? Yeah. Farmers would sometimes, when they were selling a pig, put a worthless cat in the bag instead of a piglet. Oh. That's cool. Also, what kind of idiot's going to buy a pig sight unseen that's in a bag?

2:14:09Like, hey, I got a pig for sale. Oh, yeah, I'll take it. How much is it? Five bucks. Cool. And then I grab the bag and walk away. That's fucking insane. Also, they're much different sizes. So it should be pretty clear. Although an adult cat and a pig litter are probably the same size. But just the notion that you're going to buy an animal sight unseen. I know. Just trust that it's in the bag. In the bag. Also a phrase. That's in the bag. Yeah. Money in the bag that you take from the bank. Groceries are in a bag. It's a fun game. Okay. The difference between knowledge and trivia. Knowledge is a broad and useful understanding of a subject, while trivia consists of isolated, obscure, and often inconsequential facts.

2:14:52That's because I was saying I think they're different, and we were like, they're kind of the same thing. But they are different to me. Like, are you good at trivia? You're very knowledgeable. Well, I'm better at knowledge, but I'm like, because I know in Mount Juliet, I go to trivia night. It's like one of my favorite things. Yeah. By the way, it's everyone in town's favorite thing. It's packed. I love that. It's so fun. And I'm good. I think each round's got like 10. I'm personally generally good for like six of them. But there are big categories I know nothing about. There's a ton of pop culture stuff I don't know anything about.

2:15:27Sports, I'm largely out to see on. I don't know. I don't know who won the World Series in 1980. I just can't say the Detroit Tigers because they 84. I do know that one. That's why you know one. OK. Yeah. And I think that the Dodgers win last year. Yeah, they did. But I'll likely forget that in three years. Well, I'll forget what year it was. OK. Yeah. Oh, true. Yeah. Yeah. If they go like in 2001, this batter hit a no hit walk off, you know, all these terms. I don't know what the hell they're talking about. Sure. I'm gone. OK. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, because, yeah, I think you're knowledgeable, but I guess I wouldn't have said that you would be great at trivia.

2:16:05Unless it's like, yeah, like the ones that cross over with knowledge. Science I'm going to nail, geography I'm going to nail, most of history I'm going to have a pretty good shot at it. Yep. Okay, the Leo Virgo cusp includes individuals born roughly between August 19th and August 25th. That's everyone I know. Yeah, it's me. It's Gramiolus. actually I think she might have been the 18th but that's Carly, you, my mom and I identify as a well I'm a double Virgo but when it's it sounds like you get to add more and more I get to add cusp Leo when I want well it makes sense because Leos are fire signs it makes sense it makes logical and intuitive sense it makes sense because a Leo is a fire sign Virgo is an earth sign I know I already said this on a fact check, but I saw a comedian talking about that the stock market is men's astrology.

2:17:01Oh, that's funny. That is the most accurate thing I've ever heard. Because it's also complete bullshit and doesn't mirror reality at all. It's not angered in reality whatsoever. Oh, difference between crank call and prank call. Most people use them to mean the exact same thing. And prank is more common, modern term. It usually describes a lighthearted or humorous practical joke often made by kids or teens, like asking if a refrigerator is running. Wow, classic. Crank call, older term, comes from the word crank, meaning an eccentric or ill-tempered person. Historically, a crank call was meant to genuinely harass, annoy, or upset the person receiving it rather than just have a laugh.

2:17:43Okay. It's more to penalize someone for being grumpy. Yeah, harass them, I suppose. Okay. I wanted to look up a picture real quick. You know, Punk'd was originally called harassment. Do you know that? Really? The pilot I shot was called harassment. Oh, I'm glad they changed it. They had to. That's crazy. Is it? Yeah. That word wouldn't even be in existence. Outside of prisons. Punk'd was a word in prisons? Yeah. Oh. Yeah. Is that where they got it? Uh-huh. It was like a very underground-y prison term. Oh, wow. Yeah. Now, you said Norman Reed has a, you think, has a scar on his face. The painter?

2:18:27No, no. Norman Reedus? Reedus. Oh, you said, I thought you said Reed. Who's Norman Reedus? From The Walking Dead. Walking Dead. Oh, okay. That's very cool. I think he's also in Game of Thrones and other stuff with his rad scar. I think you're thinking of a different guy. Another guy? I think, let me. I'm not seeing a scar. I think you're thinking Tommy Flanagan. Let me get his photo. Okay, let's see Flanagan. Tommy Flanagan sounds like a guy that would have a face scar for sure. Oh, yeah. Oh, wow. Bingo. Sons of Anarchy. Yeah, Sons of Anarchy. And also he's been on like some Game of Thrones-y stuff too.

2:19:08Oh, cool. That is a cool scar. Isn't that rad? This is such a ding, ding, ding. Earlier when you were talking about your chin bruise, I was about I was on the verge of saying like one of the great privileges of being a man is like we can kind of pull off cuts and scars and bruises and we kind of look cooler. Yeah, I agree. Yeah. Well, you look you look like, oh, they've been through some shit and people like that. And if a woman has been through some stuff, they're like, oh, yeah, she's used. She's used up. His is the Glasgow smile where he got the corner of his mouth slashed with a knife. Nice.

2:19:47Hardcore. Okay. Does PICA skew female? It says whether PICA skews female depends entirely on the age group and life stage being examined. Unlike most eating disorders such as anorexia or bulimia, which heavily skew female, PICA does not have a definitive baseline gender split across the entire population. It significantly fluctuates depending on demographic factors. But I think maybe the show, like it's hard because this is like based off that show. That's true. Maybe women are more willing to participate. Talk about it. Yeah. Back to the embarrassment. Ding, ding, ding. There's so many dangles.

2:20:24All right. Well, that's it for Joey. Okay. Love Joey King. Yeah. Great time, Joey. Great girl. All right. Love you. Love you. Love you.

2:20:45Thank you.