The Slow Clap

19:42Bobby Lee:I'm out. I'm not gonna perform at a wedding. I'm out. I'm out. But how about this? I'm out. It's the royal family. Okay, I'm in. Yeah. No, but as - But Prince Andrew has to be there. It is. It's his wedding. It's his wedding. It's his wedding. Okay. It is very weird. They want us to perform at a wedding. Clearly I'm like, no, we're not gonna perform at a wedding. But the thought of it was so funny that you want this beautiful, special moment. I was just in my car laughing. Like you want this beautiful, special moment of you marrying your wife and Bobby and I doing bits. You want us to do bits at the happiest moment of your life.

20:18Bobby Lee:Yeah. you want bobby and i to do a bobby llama to your uncle yeah yeah there's just no way no i've never but it did make me laugh because they did they it is where we get okay we get people to say can i propose to my wife at your show yeah we did that all the time we let them yeah but we've never been asked to do the wedding to perform at the wedding yeah cachava you know it's like i'm trying to lose weight i and cachava has completely helped me it has all the nutrients they're so delicious they have a new flavor, which is coffee, baby. Remember the strawberry one they dropped? I mean, I love that one.

20:51Every time they drop a new flavor, dude, I get stoked, man. I get hyped because this stuff is legit.

20:58Bobby Lee:It is really, really good, man. Energy, digestion, strength, metabolism, cognition. It helps with all of these things. Like energy, they support all day energy with five key vitamins and minerals, helps your digestion, fiber, probiotics, and enzymes, strength. It fuels or replenishes your muscle, the protein and electrolytes. this is super, super, super. It has everything you need. Catrava has no artificial flavors, colors, or sweeteners, non-GMO ingredients, no soy, no animal products, no gluten, and no preservatives. And this new flavor, coffee, is absolutely delicious, by the way. I love it.

21:28Bobby Lee:They have many other good flavors. They got chocolate, vanilla, chai, matcha, coconut, acai, strawberry. It's so, so good. Just two scoops provide 25 grams of protein, six grams of fiber, greens, adaptogens, and so much more. How do they get it? treat yourself to the flavor and nutrition your body craves. Go to cachava.com and use code bad friends for 15 % off your first order. That's cachava. K-A-C-H-A-V-A dot com. Code bad friends. Avocado green mattresses. Avocado green mattresses. I have an avocado green mattress. It is so comfortable. Issa's here from out of town, right? So she's sleeping on the avocado green mattress.

22:05She loves it. She's sleeping very good. their certified organic mattresses are specifically designed to relieve pressure points, support your body the way it needs, and helps you actually get the deep restorative sleep you've been missing.

22:17Bobby Lee:And every single one of Avocado Green mattresses are made with thoughtfully sourced materials and built with real care. You're going to get incredible sleep night after night after night. Bobby tells me constantly he's sleeping much better. And let me tell you something, sleep is so important and we take it for granted all the time. And we're like, oh, I got to wake up early for something. I didn't get a good night's sleep. It's going to ruin your day. Avocado green mattresses are great because they have quality that lasts and they're good for you while being good for the planet. And for avocado, sustainability isn't just a feature.

22:48It's the result of choosing better materials, better craftsmanship, and better standards from the beginning.

22:53Bobby Lee:Avocado's best-selling green mattress is made with certified agranic materials and thoughtful construction designed to deliver supportive, comfortable sleep that lasts for years. So avocado green mattresses are made, not manufactured, thoughtfully crafted with real materials to deliver lasting comfort and support. Do yourself a favor and go to avocadogreenmattress.com slash badfriends to check out their mattress and furniture sale. That's avocadogreenmattress.com slash badfriends. Avocadogreenmattress.com slash badfriends. Rocket money. You saved me so much money because in this day and age, man, saving money, bleeding out money is bad.

23:27And I had so many unwanted subscriptions and you told me to get on Rocket Money and I saved so much money on Rocket Money. If you have a lot of subscriptions out there, sometimes you don't even know. Most of the time you don't know. You sign up for an app and you're bleeding money. You don't know. What is Rocket Money? Tell them about Rocket.

23:43Bobby Lee:Well, Rocket Money, they track your subscriptions. They have the ability to cancel your unwanted ones with the app. With just a few taps, you can save users over 880 million in cancel subscriptions. That's what they've already done. And look, here's the best part about them. You don't have to negotiate to lower your bills. They can do all that stuff for you. And this app does everything. They consolidate checking, savings, loans, investments into a single dashboard. And it gives you a clear view of your financial picture, which is important because a lot of us are very lost on what's going on.

24:10Bobby Lee:Rocket Money is a personal finance app that helps find and cancel unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps lower your bill so you can grow your savings. Here's the best part. You can set budgets and goals and you get personalized insights that are going to help you with these regular reports. And you can receive real-time alerts for large transactions, upcoming bills, refunds, and low balances. And what this is going to do for everyone in the world that wants to know is it's going to help you consolidate your financial life to make it a little bit easier because we're always on our phones.

24:36Bobby Lee:We're clicking yes, pay for this, pay for that. Everything is so digitized now. You're not thinking about it. So let Rocket Money help you reach your financial goals faster. Join at rocketmoney.com slash bad friends. That's rocketmoney.com slash bad friends. Rocketmoney.com slash bad friends. Let me ask you this. Last night, so you went up.

25:00Then Ally went up. No, Ally. Went up after you. Yeah, I brought up Ally. And Ally brought me up. Correct. And she brought me up. Great intro. She always does. And you tell a joke when the guy, previous person, right? She took it well, but some people don't. How do you think about that? What I did was, ladies and gentlemen, Margaret Cho. Funny. A simple, right? She turned around, did a smirk. Yeah, like, right? And she took out well, right? Then went to the lot and slashed her tires. Yeah, but I've given people, you know what I mean, that, and they haven't talked to me for years. Well, it depends on the relationship.

25:38No, I've had great relationships with comics where I said something like, I'm not afraid to say it, but. Do it. You know what I mean? It wasn't even bad. It was Argus Hamilton. respect a legend legend right um great hair today something like it was it wasn't it wasn't anything right right you know i mean two years later he's like i have a resentment towards you you know i mean my hair looked good that night i was like two years he was feeling it yeah yeah he was probably i mean do you say i mean do you do a little slam slam you don't here's why unless it's you if it's oh you say crazy thing well

26:19Bobby Lee:But you're a friend. I can't. You know what? If it's a certain people, I'll do it. But pretty rarely. Yeah. Like because Maren and I went back and forth for a little while because that fuckhead, he'd give me an intro every time. He'd be like, I try to be friends with this guy. We went hiking once. He never wants to hike with me again. I don't know. We'll probably never be friends. Andrew Santino. That's still pretty good. And I'm like, thanks for the fucking. But that's still pretty good because it shows relationship. I know. But it's not even like you're going to like this guy. It's like, here he is.

26:43Bobby Lee:Yeah. You got I pump it up. You got Spade. Huh? What did I say about Spade? Oh, yeah. What did you say? What did you say? What did you say? I was like, give it up for that guy. What did I say? He needs it. He needs it. That's C? It crushed. It crushed. But David loves that kind of stuff. He does. He's great about stuff like that. There are certain people that enjoy it because they kind of think it's fun. He also, if you saw, he was holding me from going on stage. You do. That's a fun bit. He stops me from getting on stage. and then he pretends he needs to talk to me or something. And he's just making you wait longer.

27:20And the host is going, get to the stage. And I don't know if it's for them or the host suffering.

27:26Bobby Lee:It's both. Yeah, yeah. I think you're having two people suffer. Yeah, it works. Yeah, yeah. Because the host is always a newer comic and they don't know what to do. That's what I like. So they keep going. Yeah, yeah. And then sometimes they'll look at the curtain. See if anyone's back there, right? They get really nervous. Yeah, they do. Yeah. I do a one minute rule with Ramzi Badawi. I go one minute. What does that mean? He doesn't get to get a go on stage for a minute after his name is announced. One minute? One minute rule. Oh my God. It's the best. Does he tank? Yes. Wow. It's a challenge.

28:00To dig out of that hole? Yeah, yeah. You got to learn. You throw him in the well. Yeah, you got to throw him in the well, dude. Go get out. Yeah, Buffalo Bill style, dude. Put the lotion back in the basket. Yeah, the nails have to be in the wall. All right. So what I do is I'll grab the wrist. I apologize. I know I realized when we Googled it, that wrist grabbing is bad and I won't do it again. Right. But when I didn't know that, right, I would grab his wrist, I would close the green room door. Yeah. And I look right at him and he could come on, Bob. Right. They're already clapping. Yeah. And how much more?

28:32I go, 44, five more seconds. Oh my God. It's great. It's so uncomfortable. And then I'll gradually open the door. He'll run out there. Right. But sometimes he kills with it. Cause he used it. He tells the truth. Bobby locked me in the room for a minute Right? Yeah, he'll figure out a way And that's gonna crush Yeah, because they used to do that to me When I was opening for people Who did that? So I used to, I don't know, I've told this before I mean, I've told this before Yeah, Mencia did it Do you remember why though? No Yeah, yeah, so I used to have this bit where

29:05I would do my hair like this Yeah Right? Yeah And I would go up on stage, right? And I would Just the look would be funny Right Right So people would just laugh And I would have like a I'd just stare at the audience like that right For like 30 seconds I'd go I'm not really Asian I just woke up And it That's a great bit Dude Crush Yeah Back in the late 90s Oh my god Dude crush film Bring that back Bring that back right That's so good And then we know what Mencia said one night What He threw at me a hat Because you're not doing that bit again Why It's a crutch. It's a funny joke. I know, but he threw me a hat.

29:46Bobby Lee:Because did you do it to open every show? Every show. Well, that's okay. Yeah, every show I would use it, right? And he thought that it was not helping me, right? And so he gave me a hat. I would have to wear a hat and not do that bit. Okay, well, I get what he's doing. No, but he's trying to, it's about teaching. Yes, you're coaching. Yeah, yeah. Because you got to know, you got to know. It's good, but you got to grow. Yeah. And that anxiety, I don't know what I'm teaching with the one minute.

30:11I know that there's a lesson there somewhere. I know there's a lesson there somewhere. I just don't know what it is yet.

30:16Bobby Lee:I don't know what it is. It doesn't matter. Maybe he needs to find out what the lesson is. Maybe it's on the student, not the teacher. The teacher doesn't need to know. The teacher doesn't need to know. The student. The student must figure. They figure out the rule, right? Here's another thing I used to do. All right? You have to say yabba-dabba-doo. Yabba-dabba-doo. Five times in your set. And you can't tell the audience why. Oh, my God. It's a great one. Just in the middle of it, be like, well, you know, yabba-dabba-doo. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And you use it as a filler. So if you go, and my mom and dad, they're moving and yabba-dabba-doo.

30:49Bobby Lee:Yeah. So then, yeah, you have to throw it in. Yeah, because, you know, they used to be those, like hamburger. Hamburger? You know the comic hamburger? Oh, hamburger. Yeah, hamburger, right? They used to do that between jokes. That was their hook line. Back in the 80s or 90s, they used to have hook lines. You know what I mean? Chicken fried steak! You know what I mean? Just in the middle of nowhere. And the whole audience would chant it. Chicken fried steak! Right? So that's what I'm teaching. Right. Yeah, maybe yabba-dabba-doo is the thing. But chicken fried steak is also great. Yeah, that is great.

31:22That's a great line. Here's another thing I used to do, right? You have to hopscotch one time from one end of the stage to the other and not tell the audience why.

31:29Bobby Lee:While you're in the middle of set? No, in between jokes. So they do a punchline and then they have to... across the stage and i'm no one's laughing but i'm in the back of the room you're laughing oh my god dude oh my god i'm just cackling that's solely for you that's for you it's only for me because i've never i don't yeah yeah my god i'm a boring headliner i'm like get out there and have fun no you gotta do challenges i can't i just i'm i'm scared of making them uncomfortable i'm nervous that they're gonna be like i think this is back in the day you know what i mean Yeah not now I don't think Yeah you fuck with Ramsey now Only Ramsey now But I'll tell you why Ramsey I've He owes me his life Why?

32:11I've given him everything You've given him a lot of opportunities Yeah I've given him a lot of opportunities We're very close I talked to him last night We're good friends You do love him Yeah so he's not just an opener He's now turned into a friend So I feel like We can fuck with each other He fucks with me as well Well you know what's next

32:25Bobby Lee:You're friends You might as well be business partners with him Maybe one day Dude I watched Soft White Underbelly Yeah I love him Those are I cannot stop watching yeah some of them are hot the homeless girls so many of them oh my god you can live at my house for free yeah yeah and you know what the soft bite on her belly yeah yeah you know what's crazy about this yeah he'll go back like he'll go back like eight nine months later yeah yeah yeah see what they're doing and they're doing the same thing same thing yeah like this girl beautiful yeah yeah beautiful all she needs to get on is like you know Acatane she just needs to get on Acatane look at her face no buddy that's a tattoo oh that is oh fuck it is crazy yeah oh man that's a good one yeah wait a minute is that a bruise no she's half panda

33:14she's one of those new hybrids yeah wow like like this like this girl like for instance if she okay that the last girl that you had this girl's gorgeous gorgeous right you're single right

33:25Bobby Lee:yeah yeah yeah i mean if this girl said to me hey i'm in the throes of addiction yeah live on the streets. I'm sharing needles with strangers. I'm sleeping with people for money. What do you think? I go, come on in. But then your TV is missing. So what? Oh yeah, you're right. Get a new TV. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Get a new TV. She robs all my friends. And then like late at night, she's in the bathroom, you hear scratching sounds for some reason. Like, what is she doing in there? Right? We should note. Yeah. This is very sad. It's very sad. Very sad. No, what it is, is we love the interviews because they're powerful as shit.

34:00Bobby Lee:We get to see the window into this life of addiction that is fucking, it's dark and wild. And it takes everyone. The point we're making is addiction knows no bounds. It doesn't matter where you're from, what color you are, how much money you came from, but it's everybody. And then these interviews are fucking so powerful. Yeah, they're real. Because you feel it in your soul, man. You're like, how can, like sometimes you'll see a kid who's like 20 years old. Yeah. And he's like, I haven't been home since I was 16. You're like, why? Yeah, I love it's nurture though. It's not nature. yeah it's all nurture i think most of it's nurture i think that um you know well you don't addiction i think addiction i think addiction is nature right but if you have i know but if you have great parents right you can navigate it i i think so but i think i think that yeah without my parents because i got sober when i was 17 right my parents threw me in rehab a lot right yeah and they never stopped caring they never stopped trying you know that's important i think that's important.

34:56But also - If you have a broken home, right, your parents aren't there, they're in their own addiction. Right. You know what I mean? You have no money. You know what I mean? I mean, I mean, these things -

35:04Bobby Lee:It's a layered effect. It's a layered effect. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it gets harder and harder. Yeah. Well, I'm happy that you're sober. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But my point is, it's more - I know. It's a combination of both. It is. I'm sweating. Yeah, why are you sweating now? Because of the - I know, I know. Withdrawal. Withdrawal.

35:25Bobby Lee:How many pouches a day? Six MGs, probably three. Three a day? Yeah. That's not that bad. Yeah, yeah. I mean, I guess what do I know? But I feel like that's not that bad. I feel like the average has got to be way higher. Yeah. Oh, you'll be proud of me. Last night, I was laying in bed and I put away my phone because I was thinking about our screen time conversation. And so I put it away and I didn't touch it until made coffee in the morning, walked the dog, dropped a deuce, played with the dog in the backyard. Then when I was finally done with that, made a little snacky breakfast, and then I picked at my phone you know um i love you and i know we're business partners and friends i think that's a lie why because last night you sent me a tiktok video what time let me see what time you took a senate well i probably i wasn't in bed yet hold on hold on i wasn't in bed yet okay let me just see let me just see what time let me see so uh there are you um what time hold on i gotta go down because i get oh there you go i go ha ha ha ha so time was at what so what time did you say you put your phone down?

36:25When I went to bed. Yeah. What time?

36:27Bobby Lee:1.30. That's when you put your phone down? 1.30 or 2 in the morning. No, 12.30 or 1. Maybe that's closer to 1. Okay, 12.15 you sent it. Okay, so that's what I mean. Okay, you're right. Yeah. Okay. I don't go to bed. I thought it was much later, right? Because I was like, he's texting me. He's, you know what I mean? He's sending me a fucking instant. No, I was on the couch with the dog. Can I show him what you sent me or? It's one of the funniest. Well, I was on the couch with the dog scrolling through my phone. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

36:54Bobby Lee:so I'm sitting on my phone playing with the dog and then I said I know what I'm gonna do I'm gonna brush my teeth and I'm gonna lay in bed and just stay on my phone but I didn't I left the phone but that is one of the last texts I sent show them the video that you can send it text it to Carlos play this video so here I am sitting on the couch yeah petting the dog tick tocking away before I go to bed and I see this video and I think Bobby's got to see this right away

37:34Bobby Lee:This is what he sings about at midnight.

37:42But here's what I don't even know what's going on really to be honest with you. They don't either. Okay.

37:46Bobby Lee:This is. Yeah. She's singing a song and having her daughter or sister sing along. Yeah. I just think the. But what's the funny part?

37:56You send crazy stuff.

37:58Bobby Lee:What? Yeah, you send the most wild shit, dude. Guys with no head. Yeah, but that's unbelievable. How are they living? I was impressed by her talent. Did she post this? And if she did, what was the goal? Yeah. So I'm thinking, what am I supposed to feel? Yeah. That's why the internet's beautiful. You interpret it as you may. The second thing I would like to add is that the little one feels like doesn't want to be there. No. It's forced. It's for clicks. It's forced. Yeah, yeah. Just zoom in on the girl the whole time. Excuse me, Sabrina, do you want to do a video? No, no. Zoom in is classic. That joke sucked.

38:37Bobby Lee:No, it was good. That joke was bad. It was good. Yeah, yeah, I'm sweating, dude. All right, let's see. Just zoom in on her, start it all over again, and let's just see her from the beginning and just go to her face. One. Little little baby. Hey, hey.

38:57Bobby Lee:You're right. She doesn't want to be there. She does not. It's a hostage situation. This is a hostage. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And they put the dog in the background to give people some semblance of normal. I don't even see the dog. Where's the dog? Watch. I don't even see the dog. Right there. Yeah, where? We have to watch the video game? Yeah. Oh, there is the dog. Yeah, yeah. What a cute dog. Huh? The dog has like eight eyes or something on its forehead. Oh, maybe this is AI. It could be AI. is ai getting me all the time and i don't even know how ai is so crazy dude do you think models are in trouble because of ai uh well i know why you're asking that why are you asking because on i asked i mean why am i asking because on instagram sometimes i don't know i've seen i know do you well you've sent me some of the girls that you're questioning yeah yeah is this real real or No, it's not.

39:48Bobby Lee:But it is funny. Some of them are so they're so good at copying real influencers. Yeah. That you don't know. How about this? The real influencers are putting so many filters on. They look AI now. Exactly. So it's like a hat on a hat. Yeah, they all look fake. So the fakes look more real than the fake. It's fucked. I think filters should be illegal on dating apps. That is a very good point. I know I'm being real. No, no, no. There is an app that does that. There's one that you can't use makeup and stuff. There's like a... Oh. What is that one? Someone talked to me about this. There's a dating app where people are like in the raw or something.

40:28Bobby Lee:Yeah, real? Is that what it's called? I don't know. Whatever. Yeah. But Bobby Lee's new app is going to be no makeup, no... Oh, you can wear makeup. No, no filters. Yeah, yeah. But filters are... Let me see you first thing in the morning. Do your hair and do your face again. What? Your hair and your face again. Okay, here we go. This is your date. There should be a dating app where everybody looks like this. That would be amazing. Amazing. The first thing in the morning. First thing in the morning. First thing in the morning. First thing in the morning, dude. Dude, that's the app. First thing in the morning.

40:58Oh, I'd get no matches. That's not our problem. That's not our problem. Yeah, yeah. You can stay on Hinge. Yeah, yeah. Stay on the thing. That's where there's AI, by the way. I get fooled by Hinge AI girls. That's why I just said it should be illegal. Thank you. You're welcome. I'll vote for you then.

41:15Bobby Lee:Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, if you'd like to get on our app first thing in the morning, it's all natural. It's completely verified by humans to make sure you're human. You have to call our call center to verify that you're human. But I'm going to be working at the call center. Correct. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you can reap some of the benefits. You can go, hey, you know, I work at the call center. So if you want to wear makeup and not wear your first photo, corrupt it. Corrupt the system. Something has to corrupt it. Give them a blue checkmark kind of thing. 100 % validate them. I'm being real.

41:42That's a good idea. First thing in the morning is awesome. A dating app? Yeah. That's a really good, that's genius.

41:46Bobby Lee:Because it will force people to go, don't try to look good for this first thing in the morning photo. We will call you out. Yeah. So first thing in the morning is the app that Bob and I are creating. It's a dating app where you take a photo. Right. Every photo is right in the morning. Right in the morning. By the way, you're allowed to, every day, you're allowed to update and change that photo. Like, let's say you don't like it. You're allowed to change everything. You can leave it in perpetuity, but you can. No, no, no. You can take as many photos as you want and choose. No, no, no, no. What?

42:12Bobby Lee:I like the idea of your profile photo is you, right? First thing in the morning. Yeah. If you want to change it, you have to wait a full day. So once you upload it, that's got to stay. Yeah, yeah. And you can leave it for a few days if you want. Yeah, but dating apps, you need five or six on your page. No, no. The joke of first thing in the morning is this. It's not a joke. It's a real app. Sorry. Yeah. Shopify. Here at Bad Friends, we have an online business. And without Shopify, I don't think we would have this online business. We'd be very lost. Get started with your own design studio. I think that's what I'm trying to say.

42:41With hundreds, with ready-to-use templates, Shopify helps you build a beautiful online store, Andrew, that matches your brand's style. It's all about style. It's all about style. Hooking people in.

42:50Bobby Lee:That's right. Well, because you want to embody whatever you're selling or putting out to the world. It has to be what you are and what you're selling. And Shopify is your commerce expert with world-class expertise in everything from managing inventory to international shipping to processing returns and much more beyond that. Shopify helps all businesses of all sides. What if I get stuck? Shopify is always around. They're always around to share advice and they're award-winning 24-7 customer support. You can tackle all those important tasks in one place, from inventory to payments to analytics and so much more.

43:20Talk about the purple button.

43:21Bobby Lee:Did we mention that purple button, Bobby? No. Because that purple ShopPay button, it's used by millions of businesses around the world. It's why Shopify has the best, the best converting checkout on the planet. It also helps boost conversions, meaning less carts are going to go abandoned and more sales for you. It's time to turn those what-ifs into cha-ching with Shopify today. You can sign up for your$1 per month trial today at Shopify.com slash bad friends. Go to Shopify.com slash bad friends. You heard it right from my friend. That's Shopify.com slash bad friends. Blue Chew. I'm 54 years old, all right?

43:53And I'm going to say this right now. And I'm not embarrassed to admit it. It's harder for me to get up. Upstairs? Yeah, upstairs. You have a little leg. And sometimes you want to go upstairs when the time is right. When the time is right, you want to go upstairs. I mean, you find a lover, right? And I'm telling you right now, and I 100 % endorse Blue Chew. It saved me. You love it. I love it so much. Right, Carlos? Oh, yeah. Yeah, it's the best.

44:14Bobby Lee:It's time to level up, and Blue Chew just dropped something crazy. We're talking next level championship belt gold-plated energy. Blue Chew Gold is the newest innovation from the number one chewable ED brand. This ain't your grandpa's little blue pill. This is the four-in-one beast that's setting the gold standard for performance. we're talking about two ingredients for blood flow to keep that rock rocket pumping mixed with apomorphine and oxytocin to turn up the arousal and connection in your brain and body that's what i was gonna say dude i know yeah i know this is peak passion and peak performance in a single tablet bobby has been chewing blue chew for quite a long time now and i've heard no complaints no complaints anybody else blue chew gold dissolves under your tongue and works in as little as 15 minutes that means you can get it on quicker and stay in the game longer elevation without hesitation.

45:00Bobby Lee:Forget about all that other stuff that you know about. Blue Chew is the only one that you need to use to keep that pipe flowing, baby. And we got a special deal for our listeners. Get 10 % off your first month of Blue Chew Gold with code BADFRIENDS. That's promo code BADFRIENDS. Visit bluechew.com for more details and important safety information. And we thank Blue Chew for sponsoring the podcast and helping Bobby stay rock hard. Talkspace therapy is so important, Guys, every Thursday at four o 'clock, I do therapy, all right? Talkspace is the number one rated online therapy, bringing you professional support from licensed therapists and psychiatrists that you can access anytime, anywhere.

45:38Bobby Lee:Here's the thing, man. We all need to talk to somebody. Yeah. You know, I don't think you should keep anything bottled up. And sometimes it's hard to talk to your partner. Sometimes it's hard to talk to your parents or your friends. You just kind of want to get it off your chest to a, you know, just a nonpartisan party. and Talkspace makes help convenient for you. You can take these appointments from anywhere you are, your car, your house, your tub, your backyard. It doesn't matter. They give high quality care that's backed by science. Yeah, like I think it changed my life and also with my therapist, you know what I mean?

46:09I can talk to somebody, you know what I mean? About what's going on, you know what I mean? I'm dealing with your trauma and whatnot. I think Talkspace is so important.

46:17Bobby Lee:Well, Talkspace makes getting the help you need easy, accessible, and affordable. Plus, most insured members have a$0 copay. So you got to try it. As a listener to this podcast, you're going to get$80 off your first month with Talkspace when you go to Talkspace.com slash bad friends and enter promo code space 80. That's space 80, S-P-A-C-E 80 to match with a licensed therapist today. Go to Talkspace.com slash bad friends and enter promo code space 80. Why do you want to make it a joke? Because it is a joke. It's a death jam. You know what I mean? Yeah, kind of. No, no, no. I'm being real. Okay.

46:51We make a real app called First Thing in the Morning where it's just natural pictures of people where people really know what you look like.

46:59Bobby Lee:But the problem I have is if you let them upload multitudes of photos, they are going to try to manipulate those to look better as time goes. So that's my point. If you have one photo, that's all you get. That's how you engage. That's more interesting to me to go. That's the one thing I have to work with. Let me go from there. Otherwise, people are going to try to make those other photos look better. They're going to find a way to look as sexy as they can first thing in the morning. Yeah, but you can - You just have to upload one a day. One a day. It goes into your life. That's what I'm saying.

47:28So upload every day. You have to upload every day. And you can keep the one that you liked three days ago and not upload. Pin it. You can pin it. You can pin it. You can pin it. Okay, good, good, good. All right, good, good. Yeah, yeah. And then what's -

47:40Bobby Lee:How do you start it? We'll get an app guy. By the way, there's an app guy listening to our pod developing it as we speak. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And he's like, got it. I'm going to make a billion dollars. Yeah, yeah. We should hire someone to develop that app. Yeah. First thing. And we've talked about it too much. Yeah. So AI. I honestly think it's a good idea. It's a very good idea. Yeah. Don't you think it's a good idea? Natural. Yeah, yeah. Because we've been deceived. You know what I mean? How about this one? I'm deceiving you? No, no, no. You like roll up to a house. You see them walking out of the house and then you just drive away.

48:10That's happened. That's happened before. I've gone out with them. Me too. I've done that too. Horrible. They're like, come on in. Now I see these stories online. Wonka, wonka, wonka. What are you, a Star Wars AI movie?

48:25Bobby Lee:Wonka, wonka, wonka. How come I see these stories online of so many of these women being stood up on these dates? I know. Is this bullshit though? Is this bullshit? Because I see these TikToks or these Instagram reels of people being like, I got stood up again. And I'm like, is this happening that much? But I feel like it's happening the other way. Girls are standing up, dudes, for sure. Yeah. You've been stood up. Twice. I've stood up more girls than not. So I've actually done it. Oh, shit. Really? I've done it through scheduling. I've done it. Yeah, flaking. No, no, not flaking. I just scheduling.

48:57What do you mean? What's the difference? Like something comes up, like, you know. Oh, a fake thing.

49:00Bobby Lee:I got one more dating app for us. Oh, give me the one. I don't feel so good. That's what it's called. I don't feel so good. You see them at their worst. And when they're sick. Oh, that's a good one. Yeah. Yeah. I don't feel so good. Yeah. So the whole, the purpose. Well, let's go all the way. Yeah. Diseases too. Diseases. Yeah. Yeah. Can you take a look at this? That's what it's called. Yeah. Does this look bad to you? Tumors. Tumors. Tumors website. Yeah. Tumors. Do you have tumors? Yeah. Yeah. I do too. Yeah. Honestly, I think, I think a sick one where, where the photos of you are when you have been very sick are very, it's very funny.

49:42Bobby Lee:because what you look like when you're sick, that's the fucking, that's way worse than first thing in the morning. Oh, yeah, yeah. Because when you're sick, you look the worst. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know. Yeah, yeah. I think, yeah. I know. I'm experimenting. I know you are. First thing in the morning. I'm an app developer. Oh, yeah, yeah. First, yeah. First, all right. First thing in the morning, we'll take. We'll do first thing in the morning. Yeah, I like that one, yeah. Someone is doing it. Yeah. You know that. What's up, dog? Hey, buddy. Is that All Saints? What are you wearing there, Mike?

50:07Bobby Lee:Oh, see, he's interested in the clothes already. Oh, you like the shirt? Yeah, I like the fit because I don't - This is my merch. Oh, this is your merch? Yeah. Really good fit, dude. Thank you, bro. The pants too? This is Puma. Oh. I rock Puma, nothing but Puma, and then the shirt says, buildings don't fall like that. Yeah, wow. Yeah, which is just a fun - 9-11. You get it. Yeah, yeah. You got YouTube. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. I'm a YouTube guy, dude. You know, buildings don't fall like that, do they? They don't. I think it's important to talk about it. And laugh about it. First of all, it used to be funny.

50:34Now it's just too true. Yeah. Too much people know.

50:37Bobby Lee:We found out all the conspiracy theories turned out to be real. Yeah. QAnon was correct on almost everything they predicted. They did. Nailed it. Pizza, pizza, pizza, pizza. Honestly, I was nailing it the last 12 years. Hammer drunk at most bars. Yeah. You were telling people the truth. Now I'm calling people like, dude, I was right the whole time. Yeah. I'm still on your fit though. Yeah. He likes the fit. He loves the fit. The shoes. Puma also. Yeah, yeah. White, brand new. No, I keep them clean. I got some dirt. I get the same ones dirty. Yeah, yeah. You look good today, man. Thank you, bro.

51:06Insinuating I look bad most days.

51:08Bobby Lee:No, no. No, no. That's not true. No, wait. I'm sorry. No, no, no. That's what I was insinuating. Is that the word? It is. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I was just saying, I was giving you a compliment. Thank you, bro. How nice you look today. Thank you, bro. That's all it was. Cincinnati's finest. Cincinnati, right? Oh, yeah. Cincinnati's finest. Yeah, we're a couple of Midwest boys that attended a great university in the desert. That's right, dude. Phoenix. Arizona State. Go Devils. That's his mother's home now. Really? What are her cross streets? Tell him where your mom is. If I was going to focus on one of the windows in the home, which would I?

51:38That's a good one. Thank you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You like Asian ladies? You know what? I got one at the crib right now. You really? Yeah. Your girlfriend's Asian? Yeah. Do I know her? No, she's, I don't date other comics. Yeah, yeah. I try not to. I don't. I actually act. Do I know her? Do I know her? You know what? Honestly. Do I know her? I see Mike at the comedies all the time. I know you guys all know each other. Right, so you mean there could have... You know what? We live close to your hood. I live by K-Town, so... Yeah, yeah, yeah. I drive home sometimes and we don't know each other too well, but I'm always like, what if I just turned and saw Bobby Lee just getting a handy in the alley?

52:11Yeah, yeah, yeah. In K-Town.

52:13Bobby Lee:It's more likely he's over there eating Korean barbecue. Barbecue, yeah. Which is not the same thing sometimes. It is. Is she full-blooded or half? She is full-blooded. She is not your... This is my first of all. She's not Korean. I want to say that. That's fine. Yeah, which I love because... yeah we love that I want more because you guys are like elite Asians that's right you see that again you're elevated Asian can you see that again please you're elite Asians you're aware of this right thank you there's a there are rankings the Asians know is she Chinese no she's oh that's also not a Philip you go on Filipino no you're in the you're the ocean stay on land getting closer tie there was a there was a yeah give us a hint yeah there was a similar war to Korea.

52:55Cambodian. Brother, you don't know. This is tough. You went straight to Cambodia? I teed you up there. There was a similar war. Stay in the fucking game. Cambodian, no. Alright, good. Let's stay in the game. Alright. We did family feud. We lost a flavor of life.

53:15Bobby Lee:First of all, that was rigged. That was fucking rigged. Okay, that's what we were dealing with, though. Okay? Not Laotian. Not Cambodian. Not Thai. You said Thai, Filipino, Chinese. Give us another hint, please. Phenomenal. Culinary stuff, really good. And like a huge... Vietnam. Yes. Vietnamese. Like a very popular dish. Vietnamese? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now, that wasn't much of a war. Brother, I think we won. Yeah. You know, I like to tell people we did. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And that's why I always say our relationship, if it ends, I'm going to tell everybody I won. Great movies. We won. You know what I'm saying?

53:49What's your favorite Vietnam movie, you think? My favorite rom-com is Hamburger Hill. I stick around for the blue purse at the end. I don't know. I probably like... I mean, they're all pretty depressing. There's none that are like... What's the Full Metal Jacket? Classic. So funny. Full Metal Jacket might be one of the best movies

54:08Bobby Lee:of all time. You think? That's a tough... That's a bold... I love that movie. It's such a... I'm fine with that. It's a dark, beautiful movie. It says a lot. And then I'm like almost... I'm 39, so when I watched that movie growing up that was such a the first time you see a movie where you're like yo what the fuck what the fuck yeah like halfway through you're like what there's more movie oh yeah oh yeah i'm not joining the military yeah oh my god well i'm from the big west so you i know but when you when i saw that as a kid i was like i don't think i'm gonna join the military no the first half of full metal jack late you're like i can't deal with that yeah screaming yeah no yeah yeah me waking up at a certain hour get up you little piece of shit it's 2 p.m how close were you to joining the military out of high school.

54:51I wasn't, but that's what I say about the Midwest. You either leave the Midwest at 18, you're dying in the Middle East. Yeah. Right. It's true. A real good slogan. Yeah. That's my other merch. It's in camouflage. It doesn't hit as hard.

55:04Bobby Lee:Midwest people that a lot of our friends, yeah. I think they go for the Midwest first. Yeah. We're easy. I think that we are very American, proud to be American. Yes. So I say I didn't go, but a lot of my good friends joined. A couple of homies passed away. and I know yeah that's honestly that was my origin origin comedy stories my buddy passed away when I was 21 I was like I hit the family up I was like yo I gotta speak at his funeral I had the preacher crying and laughing and that was the first time I was like yo I can do something with this yeah if I got people cracking up at a funeral yeah because I was 21 and that nobody knows anybody more at that age than your friends you know what I mean your parents and your family don't know you my dog died last Saturday maybe you should have showed up yeah I would I would crush.

55:49Chuckle cry. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, first of all, I told the story, I told the story the

55:53Bobby Lee:other night about you flirting with the vet tech that came to put your dog to rest. Yeah. I mean, that's amazing that the guy's dog is dying and the vet comes and he's, he's trying to fuck. He timed out the blue chew snort at a bad time. He's like, daddy's rock hard. You took the wrong pill. Goodbye, Remy. Hello, mommy. insane hey we all mourn differently that's exactly right that's but i gave him credit yeah you're vulnerable yeah as a california boy do you think i'm a pussy uh i don't think i know um facts you think i am though you think i'm a little weaker my strand because you're california yeah yeah i'm san diego boy la most of my life i think my generalization on my worldview is yes this is just because you're from SoCal often times now if he was from SoCal and he was Mexican different story you have no East LA in you what do I have in me you've got a lot of garden grove some garden grove in you maybe some OC you've got some nice Anaheim areas in you Boba there's some Boba in my story he's a lot more Montebello you know what I mean yeah yeah he doesn't know he's rocking when he starts rocking this is deep so cal don't come a knocking dude this guy he'll go nuts I'll go nuts on you guys

57:21anyway yeah there's some suburb in me too yeah yeah yeah mall life my life a lot of mall life yeah oh you know what I'm not above mall life you know people watching okay good good good San Diego but you think in a war no I think he started something with me I'll go for it yeah Yeah, fuck them up. You think in a war-like situation, I am much older than you are. Sure. Much. Yeah, yeah, but you think - They're not recruiting you. Yeah, yeah. Not now. Sure. Yeah, but back in my day, we're the same age. You think that you would stand, you would be tougher and more resilient in a war-like situation?

57:52Yeah. Yeah, I mean, dude, I used to crush laser tag. Oh, right, right, right. Okay, good, good. I could dodge and stuff like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because I took third when I did the VR boom, you know what I mean? Sandbox? You got the laser. The last one I got number one, but I was with, you know what I mean, Jules and that.

58:06Bobby Lee:Yeah, but maybe you're right. This guy, he'll cheat at an escape room. He's so clever. He's good. Yeah, I'll do it twice and then take a date on it. He'll go, oh no, this is how you do it. But that's what's so good about you is that's why Bobby would be good in wartime. He would find a way. I find a way to live and survive. You do. That's fair. It's selfish though. So what? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It depends on your perspective on what's good at work. kills or survival. You're surviving. I always thought that in a war movie. You and I would be dead. We'd be dead, but we'd get a couple kills. 100%. I'd get no kills, but your dead bodies, you'd be on me.

58:45Yeah. Have you ever thought that? You would pull me over. Two dead bodies and just pretend I'm dead. I'd die in a murder suite, dude. I'd kill a guy and be like, dude, I can't go on.

58:54Bobby Lee:My legs would be blown off, and I'd get a few hits, and then be like, I gotta get on. But in a Forrest Gump situation, you know what I mean? My leg's blown off. Would you come and get me and drag me or no? I would get you. You'd seem the most carryable. That's a very good, you're a thinker. Well, this is post-Wagovi, yes. Yeah, post-Wagovi, yes. Yes, pre-Wagovi, a little bit harder. A little harder. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Speaking of which, that Tom Hanks threw me, I saw on the Shitter this morning, Jim Ursay, the old owner of the Colts. Sure. You're a big football fan. He's passed away. You're a big football fan.

59:25Bobby Lee:Yeah, yeah. He sold, you're going to love this, dude. This is going to blow your mind. He had the biggest collection of sports and whatever memorabilia that you've ever seen in your life. He has a fucking guitar of Hendrix. He's got Dylan's guitar. He's got, this guy had, look at this collection. And it's up for live auction now. Oh, dude. The collection this guy had is so unbelievable. Yeah. He's got the lyrics of fucking Hey Jude handwritten by McCartney. I mean. Really? The collection is explore the 3D space. or whatever go through it and he's got John's passive aggressive corrections on there too it's a deep Beatles for all the people that watch all four episodes it was so good but look at that wow hold on hold on so a lot of rock and roll but dude he had Ali's robe that he wore out oh really Hunter S.

1:00:22Bobby Lee:Thompson that's Hunter S. Thompson's car wow that's amazing that's the fucking saddle from what's the horse that Secretariat? Secretariat that's the original script that Rocky was written in that that's incredible dude Stallone probably wrote it on a typewriter and then wrote it down just to be like what I did Jack Kerouac's type script scroll of On the Road Kerouac's book On the Road on type script wow that's a weird one no that's amazing that book is so fucking good this guy's got so this is the kind of shit Gretzky's jersey from his 500th Oh, damn. Keep going. That's a lot of value there, too.

1:01:00Bobby Lee:A lot of value there. I think they said some of it is you can't price it. Oh, this is the one that you would have loved, too. Which one? Smells Like Teen Spirit, Kurt's guitar from Smells Like Teen Spirit. Yeah. Really? The actual fucking guitar. From like the video or like? From the video. From the video. From the video, right? Johnny Cash's D21 acoustic. Dude. Yeah. I don't know if I had the money that I would do that. If you had his money, yes, you would. No, I wouldn't. Bobby, the guy was worth billions. What are you going to do with it? You of all people love music shit. Yeah. You wouldn't go buy Cobain's left-handed Fender Mustang?

1:01:33Bobby Lee:How much is it? It's not priced on there. It's forbidding. Oh, no. The estimate is crazy. Is it two to five mil? 2.5 to five. It's either 2.5 million to five million. That's a big gap. That's crazy. I think maybe, yeah, you're right. That one I would. You would. You'd want specific things. Clapton's the fool, Gibson. Look at how fucking. But like Janis Joplin's toenail. I don't know what,$5. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You'd want things that are personal to your appreciation. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, if you had unlimited - There's certain things I wouldn't buy. If you had unlimited funds, Mike, what would you buy?

1:01:59I would do some weird, like I'm a big hip hop guy, but I don't know. I'd like get the MPC player that Dilla did some stuff on maybe or something like that. Or like some Tribe Called Quest shit. I don't know. Low End Theory, good album.

1:02:10Bobby Lee:Great album. You know what I always thought that I would love? People's Indictive Travels too, by the way. You know what I always thought I would love? The carpets that are in recording rooms that go underneath the musical instruments to muffle the sound. I want one of those carpets from someone powerful to put in my house. Because these things, they sit on a shelf and I think this I'd want the carpet to be my fucking carpet in my house. I want the carpet from the Menendez killings. In the parents' bedroom. I always wonder how much is that? I want the duvet cover. It's beautiful. Miles Davis' trumpet.

1:02:43Bobby Lee:I mean, get fucked. I don't know what I would like the sports stuff too. And then I'm a big movie guy. Wouldn't you like things from movies? Well, look, what's something from a famous film that like moved you or like the gun that vincent d 'onofrio blasted his head off 20 minutes into full metal that's all that's a pretty that's a fun one that's a fun one that's a fun that is actually a weird that is very dark i went immediately dark but uh i got one oh yeah right yeah i mean we're walking here that car that he slapped oh the taxon with midnight cowboy right hey we're walking here you know i mean that car i'd buy yeah oh yeah you know what else $100.

1:03:15Bobby Lee:He had the original volleyball from fucking Castaway. No. He had Wilson. Really? Yeah. He has some movie stuff in there that was pretty cool. That's pretty cool. Like, oh, you know, I showed you the photo. And I think we can say it. It doesn't matter. But over at Spade's house, I got emotional because in the hallway. I saw it. He has Farley's jacket. Oh, that'd be. And dude, it's even looking at it. Which jacket? If I got a little coat jacket or what? No, a jacket when he was three years old. That one, right? Yeah, yeah, that jacket. The Tommy Boy jacket. Tommy Joe jacket. Yeah. The jacket on Tommy.

1:03:51I'm bombing. This is sold. How much is it? Sorry, Mike, I'm bombing. I like that. He's tanking the room. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 101 grand it sold for. Wow. And then now this image has conspiracy theory stuff all over it, too. Does it? Oh, yeah. Tell me one. No, let's go. Well, like that image is something that is on a lot of celebrities' shirts. It's something very similar to that, and that is something that they now, with the Epstein stuff coming out, is like attached to that. What? Wow. Connect that to

1:04:16Bobby Lee:like there's some weird conspiracies. Turner, open us up, dude. Open my mind. I mean, there's some, yeah, QAnon. Oh, baseless. I don't know. Baseless. Pedophilia myths. Wade, pop culture trivia. The original heavily damaged Wilson prop in the film was sold in an auction for$308 ,000 confirming its high status in pop culture rather than any hidden sinister meaning. This sounds like AI's trying to convince us of this. Why would they say that? You said it. I didn't. You brought this up. Yeah, come on. It's like Ellen has a shirt with it. Jay-Z has a shirt with it. It's tough stuff. Ellen. Ellen, yeah.

1:04:51Bobby Lee:Is she gone? What did she do? Didn't she leave? Didn't she get mad at Trump and left the country? What a fall off. One of my, honestly, growing up, one of my favorite stand-ups. Yeah, what did she do? And now you're like, what the hell? She was a great stand-up. Those HBO specials, the early ones, they're so fucking good. So good. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And now you're like, oh, she's a monster. Remember the deer antler bit? Huh? The deer antler bit on the wall. didn't she have a bit like that maybe i just remember the slipping and falling one oh that's a good one yeah yeah no i like the elevator button yeah that's how good there's like three i already pushed it yeah it might make it come faster i love that that's such a stupid idea yeah yeah she was great and then she just uh now she's gone yeah i mean the ann hess death i think she got i think she got two you know that oh yeah she died on a car that all of a sudden went speeding through Brentwood or something like that.

1:05:38And then she was pronounced dead on the scene. But if you, there's a video of her going to the ambulance where she physically gets out of the gurney. It's crazy. That's insane.

1:05:45Bobby Lee:She wakes up for a second. Then they push her back down. It's creepy, creepy shit. Whoa. That is where their last words were Castaway should have won the Oscar. So that's the whole, that's full circle. Yeah. So Mike, where can we see your special? It's on YouTube. Yeah. And when did you release it? On, you know what I did? Yeah. So I filmed it on New Year's and then I'm familiar with the Asian culture and I dropped it on Lunar New Year. Thank you. Chuk Mung Nha Mai. Thank you. Thank you. I don't know what your culture says, but happy belated lunar. Thank you. And so, yeah, it's on YouTube. Michael Turner comedy on YouTube.

1:06:22And then, yeah, just dropped it. I filmed it at Fort Collins on New Year's Eve. I've never seen anybody film a special on New Year's Eve. And I was like, you know what? I like keeping things loose. I'm like loose, but also tight with my bits. Yeah. And New Year's is a very combative night sometimes. Yeah. That'd be fun. Shout out to Fort Collins. Congratulations. Thank you, man. Yeah. Self-funded and it's all me. Well, Michael Turner's a very, very, very funny standup. He's up and coming. We love him here at Bad Friends. And go check out his fucking special on YouTube.

1:06:50Bobby Lee:Also, by the way, you do a great job for people that are sports fans. You are a sports fan, but specific sports fans. Have you ever done it at a soccer game? No. Because he's a diehard soccer fan. Really? That's interesting. You would do it for you. Wait, wait, wait. What's that? Why? I will I don't know I just don't meet a lot of soccer fans in America okay good very good yeah good counter am I being Mike I just want to let you know I know you're blushing but um I I quit smoking a couple days ago so I'm a little agitated I know it comes across I was like as I'm being combative right but it's just me full of anxiety I said oh interesting why the fuck is it interesting yeah yeah yeah so that's what that funny how motherfucker yeah so I apologize it's yeah yeah i apologize no you're doing fine yeah you're doing great yeah yeah but i don't say it enough i'm proud of you see oh thank you so much mike yeah yeah i told you he's proud yeah thank you so no he does interviews outside of uh football games and they're very very fucking funny and it's usually um it's a little bit of negging it's but it's but it's light ribbing in a way that people would really love that like sports and it's some like i know enough about the opposing team to make fun of them but also be aware i'm a fan of bad sports teams too so it's like you can make fun of me too so it's fun yeah it's like yeah i'm sorry brother cincinnati bangles god bless the bangles yeah arizona state sun devils phoenix suns arizona state not that you would give a fuck whatsoever we literally played a men's basketball game two days ago and lost 45 points i think i think it was 50 points yeah pretty cool and bob really was like i'm out i'm done can you imagine this in soccer would be losing like 12 to nil yeah it that's how big of a in men's basketball it was losing by 50 alarming unheard of it's it's like a it's like even the players who were winning were like are you guys okay yeah yeah we're tapping into we're fucking you guys up i had friends i haven't heard of in years being like you good dog you're high bro yeah yeah you need some help but i do i like i like sports drinking beer talking shit and so i go to sports games and uh sporting events and then i do a tour around it every year so it's so that's my that's uh you gotta be a self-starter in comedy as you guys know so just started well you're well you're you're here aren't you this is great yeah i appreciate you guys putting me on the Oh, we're proud to have you on the top.

1:08:55You guys are great. You guys have always been very kind to me, so I appreciate it. Can I be honest with you? Uh-oh. Uh-oh. Careful. Settle in. Yeah, I want to settle in. Let's be real.

1:09:04Bobby Lee:Yeah, say what you need to say. I don't think I have been that kind to you. That's fair. No, I don't think that I've given you enough time of myself. Let's be honest with you. I think that I've been in and out with you. Is there a route? I don't know. I think it's the Jonesing that I'm feeling, but I feel a little vulnerable right now. You're saying in general, right now? I think in general, I bypass him a lot at the store, and I don't really take the time to say hi. I think that you are - Let's get it on the table. You are an interesting guy to me, because I know you and I are good friends. When I see you, it's always love and say whatever.

1:09:43And so sometimes, like I remember initially when you guys started the pod, I was like, oh, Bobby would probably be cool to me. And we've had some back and forth. You know what it is though? I'm just who I am. I'm from the Midwest. I'm just a dude that's from Cincinnati. And I remember one of our first interactions. This is probably something that's not shocking to either of you. I think you like tried to high kick me. And like speaking of soccer, being a soccer fan, now I know you're just a soccer fan. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He tried to. Yeah. He tried to. I think that's what it was. Liu Kang me. Yeah.

1:10:11He tried to. He tried to bite kick me. I was like, dude, I've seen Mortal Kombat and I've got a couple of Asian stereotypes I can kick at you too. I understand that. But I'm above that. But that's what I remember in my relationship with you. It's not like, it's more like a violence. And so I want to change. Yeah. No, today's the day. We're buddies with the same people. Ramsey's a good buddy of mine. Yeah, we talked about him.

1:10:32Bobby Lee:Let me clarify something. Okay, okay. He will only kick you if he likes you. So now knowing, like seeing some. Am I right? I don't kick everyone. I do think. Let's just get that out of the way. I think about that now in hindsight. And was it high? It was high. It was impressive. That's a good one. And this is a pre-GLP thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's because I like you. So again, now I know that. Yeah, yeah. I was like newer to LA and I'm just not the type of cat that'd be like, that was cool. Yeah, yeah. And I didn't say anything, but I probably gave you body language was like, yo. That wasn't cool.

1:11:02Nah. Oh, I think that's what I read. I think that's what I read. And I was like, nah, I said, nah, myself. Yes. I bet you did. Because I don't like your reaction. 100%. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're like, who the fuck is this? Is this a headliner? Yeah. I don't see his name on the wall. You know what I mean? but then i don't i don't bend the knee and i don't i know you don't and you know what and now we have understanding yeah right but the next time i high kick you die i'm fucking grabbing it okay you know i'm saying maybe a ddt okay okay his girlfriend he's been training for years she's vietnamese her family's all vietnamese oh there's traps i've been to i've been to the house you know how battle tested i am right you ever party with some vietnamese people yeah yeah yeah i know what

1:11:41Bobby Lee:the fuck to do yeah yeah wait this is interesting because you i want just a quick perspective share of where in the overlap of the pie charts of you've adopted a Filipino family into your life. Oh, that's interesting. You've adopted a Vietnamese family into your life. I want to know what the similarities are of like, because you live, they live at your house. Yeah, they do. And now you're embedded into their life. Yeah, we've lived together for a couple years now. Do you have, are there moments where - Let me ask, can they sleep anywhere? oh yes she could yeah yeah that's a similar right yeah yeah she's like in the kitchen on the floor they sleep everywhere they do they just fall asleep when they're just i'll just go oh right right and it's just jewels on a fucking chair sleeping like this i mean yeah can they eat like anything yeah and like in amounts that are alarming yeah yeah i've i've done this like um i'll get two jersey mike sandwiches yeah right two yeah you're eating two no i don't eat them I have an emergency one.

1:12:42Good check on that. That's crazy. I'm a huge J. Mike's guy. That's nuts. I'll get two and I'll do an emergency one. That's smart. I'll keep that in the fridge. Then it'll be there for I don't know how long. They'll eat it. After a week. They'll still eat it.

1:13:02Bobby Lee:They'll eat the wrapper too. They won't eat the wrapper. They don't waste. They don't waste. Are they actually from the Philippines? and now live here? Oh, yeah. Yeah. So she's, okay, yeah. Well, you know how it is. I want to high kick you so bad. I just want to high kick you so bad right now, dude. Is your girlfriend from? So half her family's from Vietnam, but she was born in Cali. So she has a, she's more of a Cali. Oh, well, mine's from the actual, you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, half her family is, and I party with them a lot, and we kick it a lot, and they're great. I've never had more support in my life, but if you cross them, the most - You never cross.

1:13:34It's the most combative shit I've ever seen in my life.

1:13:36Bobby Lee:Right, so if this relationship, which I hope it never does go south, you need to leave the country. You know what's funny is if it hits, it'd be so cold and icy that there'd be no interaction ever again. It'd be dead in a way that would hurt more than if it was combatant. I got you. I got you. As if it was with a white girl. You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah, but this is like - This is, ooh. Yeah. And also Southeast Asia, both Philippines. That's the other crossover in Southeast Asia, but Filipinos are obviously on the island. Yeah. But Vietnamese are, that's kind of, that energy is a little similar, I've always found.

1:14:10Laos, Cambodia, Vietnam, Filipinos. Is that fair? It is fair. I'm dating a hippie white. And hippie whites though, right? This is your first hippie white. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hippie whites are different. They're different. They're a lot more like Asians. In what way? They'll eat anything. Well, that's because they're high. Is that why? Yeah. That's the weed. I see it. That's the weed. Okay, okay, okay, okay.

1:14:31Bobby Lee:But also hippie whites are like Asians in this trying to find. In a Zen way. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Probably closer to Buddhism. Yeah, right. Then Catholicism. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And this hippie. You'll leave the room while I'm bearing it and they're doing this. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Like that, yeah, yeah. And this hippie Asian has coached. You know, I got to, you know. Has coached. It is interesting that you're open-minded to other Asians, though. Usually other Asians hate other Asians. Yeah. Which is fun. Whoa, whoa, whoa, what? Like, I know, like, Koreans don't like Chinese. That's absolutely.

1:15:01That's absolutely not true. Well, all right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. I love all the Asians. Except for. This is you. What? Except for. What?

1:15:09Bobby Lee:Which one? Indians. You can always get one. I'm totally kidding. No, I love everybody. He's kidding. I'm kidding. Look in the mic. Look in there and go, thank you for being a bad friend. Well, first of all, we want to thank Mike for coming on the show. Yeah, I already did that. We already plugged the special. You did. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just have to go. He's got a gate. Oh, really? With the hippie girl? Yeah, yeah. Proud of you. Yeah, yeah. I gotta go. Thank you for being a bad friend. Is that what I said? Say it again. It's still good. Thank you for being a bad friend. Love it. Yeah. Woo. I don't know when this episode comes out, right?

1:15:42But the towels were not done. Really? Yeah. After all of this. After all of that. We did an entire episode about towels. About it. The towels were not done. Three in the morning last night, I texted Jules. I go, where are my towels? Right? And she goes, I'm going to Hawaii. She went clubbing too.

1:15:59Bobby Lee:She went clubbing for three hours. Maybe the merch will be your towels at some point. Yeah. Use some of our merch as towels. Maybe. But she did not do the towels. Insane. All right.

1:16:26All right.

1:16:29Bobby Lee:Ryan Reynolds here from Mint Mobile, with a message for everyone paying big wireless way too much. Please, for the love of everything good in this world, stop. With Mint, you can get premium wireless for just$15 a month. Of course, if you enjoy overpaying, no judgments, but that's weird. Okay, one judgment. Anyway, give it a try at mintmobile.com slash switch. Upfront payment of$45 for three-month plan, equivalent to$15 per month required. Intro rate first three months only, then full price plan options available. Taxes and fees extra. See full terms at MintMobile.com.