Yellow Peril & Cave Butter

6:46Khalyla Kuhn:And then she was like, then she just kind of made out with me in the hallway.

6:51Bobby Lee:Just started making out with you?

6:52Khalyla Kuhn:Well, we talked a little bit. Had a cigarette, right? I bought her a drink.

6:55Bobby Lee:Like the Coke commercial. Just like the Coke commercial.

6:58Khalyla Kuhn:And then we raced cars and started dancing. It was crazy. It's pretty cool.

7:03Bobby Lee:Yeah, yeah.

7:04Khalyla Kuhn:One battle after another, though. That's one of the best movies I've seen. Best movies I've ever seen.

7:09Bobby Lee:Also underrated as far as comedy goes. It won't be considered a comedy, but it absolutely is a comedy. It's an action movie, but it's a comedy for sure.

7:15Khalyla Kuhn:Yeah, I find Leo, because of Once Upon a Time in Hollywood too, I think he was very funny in that at times. Yeah, oh yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just think that it's, because he plays it real as well. It's interesting. They're funny situations, but he's such a good actor. And when you play it real. That's when it's funny. That's when it's super funny. He's not like,

7:34Bobby Lee:it's not like a, it's not like, you know, like a Will Ferrell character. that he's supposed to be, he is just being funny because this one, the situations are very honest, but the reaction is funny.

7:45Khalyla Kuhn:Yeah, yeah. Yeah. And Benicio was great in it. So good. The best.

7:49Bobby Lee:How old is Benicio Del Toro at this point? Let's take a guess.

7:52Khalyla Kuhn:Okay. 50 something.

7:54Bobby Lee:I thought maybe almost 60 by now. 60 gotta be. 62 is my guess.

8:00Khalyla Kuhn:Do you want to guess, Bob? Well, I remember when he first came, when he did Usual Suspects, I was at the Mondrian I was a doorman

8:10Bobby Lee:but how old was he then? 30?

8:12Khalyla Kuhn:but he's seen my age but he was like on fire because it was him and Michael Rappaport were in the Mondrian and I'd see them like dancing with these hot chicks and I remember just sitting there by myself with a Diet Coke sipping going oh my god that's the new Hollywood

8:29Bobby Lee:oh I want to ask you this this is interesting these newer theaters these nicer movie theaters now it's not just the old school snacks yeah the upgrade is crazy crazy bro they had we had uh what's it raisinets that's old school let me guess let me guess no no you're this is just insane they had those high-end chalk like dark chocolate bars with mixed in like raspberry flakes and all that stuff and i was like i'm not getting at the fucking movie theater and she was like let's just get it just with their

9:00Khalyla Kuhn:popcorn i was i can't go back yeah the dark milk the dark chocolate with like the raspberry like

9:06Bobby Lee:Like the Lindt chocolate bars, you know those? They had those on display. They had 10 different flavors. I was like, come on, get three or four.

9:12Khalyla Kuhn:How do you get the butter at the bottom of the bucket? Say it again. How do you get the butter at the bottom of the bucket?

9:20Bobby Lee:Well, you're going to think I'm a psychopath.

9:22Khalyla Kuhn:No, because I don't know how to do it.

9:23Bobby Lee:Because I squirt a cup of butter. I get a side cup for a fountain and I put butter in it. And then I eat the popcorn and I sip the butter. Whoa.

9:32Khalyla Kuhn:Like a chaser. A chaser. A butter chaser. A butter chaser. Wow. But how do you do it? Do you move? Sometimes I try to move it. Or you put the butter on top and you do a shake. Like, what do you do? How do you get the butter on the bottom? Do you want my secret? Yeah.

9:46Bobby Lee:So you get the bucket. You can't get the bag. The bag is an issue, right? You get the bucket and you go, hey, can you fill that up just below the line? I know, don't overflow it. And they fill it up just below the line and you go, can I get a second bucket? I'll pay for just an empty bucket. And I put the bucket on top of the bucket and I shake it like a salad and then mix it all up. And I just throw away. You really do that? Yeah, I throw away the second bucket. that's ingenious it's that or the bucket or the butter shot i'll do a butter shot too i'll take a little yeah okay take a little butter back yeah a little popcorn butter back what kind of butter is it it seems like oil it's oil butter it's oil yeah well it's also been sitting in that vat for about 40 days yeah there's no way they clean it it's not good for you you know that's how i got sick in college right what oh i got butter my buddy my buddy colin and i could call him my buddy colin and i got food poisoning during finals week of college we went to go see a movie with our buddy, Colorado John.

10:33Bobby Lee:And John was the only guy that didn't eat popcorn. He's like, nah, I don't want popcorn, man. And we shared a bucket of popcorn and we got so fucking sick.

10:40Khalyla Kuhn:How do you get food poisoning from popcorn?

10:42Bobby Lee:From the butter. From the butter. The oil butter. The butter spoiled. Oh my God. The doctor was like, what did you eat? I went down the list. I was like, dude, I had ramen, which literally doesn't go bad. Ramen lasts about nine million years in that packet. Yeah. I go, I had ramen for lunch. That's all I ate until we got to the theater. And then Colin had a totally different meal. We both were sick for two full days. I lost like nine pounds. It was insane. I look good for finals. I wasn't my shirt off. A, B, C. Dude, I was sick. That's the sickest I've ever been food poisoning. And the doctor concluded, he was like, well, it had to have been, did you put butter?

11:13Bobby Lee:I said, yeah, of course we had butter on the pot. He goes, that dude brother, that's 100 % what it was. It's also a college campus movie theater. The fucking goons work in there are stoned to the bone like us. They're not paying attention and cleaning shit. Dirty, dirty, dirty.

11:27Khalyla Kuhn:So if you go to Major Domo, They used to have cave butter. There's a cave somewhere in California where they get the butter.

11:36Bobby Lee:What are you talking about? Butter comes from cows.

11:38Khalyla Kuhn:No, there's cave butter, dude.

11:40Bobby Lee:So it just organically grows in the cave?

11:42Khalyla Kuhn:You know, there's like a bat in there. I don't know what it is, but like -

11:44Bobby Lee:Major Domo cave butter refers to cave aged butter from crown finished caves served at David Chang's restaurant.

11:49Khalyla Kuhn:That's what I'm saying. Right. Right? So what I'm saying - Crown finished. And you can taste the difference. Because it's from a cave. Yeah, it's definitely cave butter, dude. What is - It's just they store it in a cave. That's all it is. I know, that's what I'm saying. I didn't say it's from the cave. There's not one cow and they're going. How funny if there was just a cow in a cave. He's exhausted. They're milking him all day long. Yeah. Leave me alone. Yeah. But what I'm saying is you take fancy butter like that. Right. And then you put that in popcorn somehow. Ah. This is hard. Like level it out.

12:20Khalyla Kuhn:No, level out because the oil butter is fucking bad for you. Of course. And cave butter is so flavorful. why don't we just take it to the next level take it to the next level with the cave butter please how do you do it do you condense the cave butter into a liquid form you have to judge more of course you have to

12:38Bobby Lee:well it can't be that much more how much is cave butter very expensive that's like a thousand dollars a bar fancy cave butter yeah yeah like elevate the popcorn we must at this point it is yeah frank's gourmet popcorn butter flavored coconut oil oh yeah it's a substitute Substitute. No, these are all substitutes, my guy. But still not elevated enough for me, dude. Okay, but how about this? When you get a candy, like an M &M's, you sprinkle that in the popcorn, yes? No. Insane you don't do that. Do you do that? Everybody does that. You sprinkle them in there, then you get to grab a couple handfuls, then you get one popcorn with some of the M &M's.

13:13Bobby Lee:Because the M &M's don't go all the way through. They stick halfway in some of the crevasses.

13:16Khalyla Kuhn:Okay, no, I got a good idea. You make it so it's like a fucking yogurt chop. Oh, yeah, yeah. So it's just not just K butter. right but you put graham the graham crumb a little bit of graham right from uh some toffee some sort of toffee thing maybe maybe candied pecans exactly if you're getting nuts candied walnuts you're getting fucking you put the butter in first so that all the other stuff sticks to it i like this right what do you think maybe a blueberry you know it's a stretch but i like it i like it one blueberry one blueberry in the bottom of it you got you have to try to find it and your partner goes, you got the blueberry?

13:55Khalyla Kuhn:Yeah, there's only one in there. That's good for good luck. That's for, yeah. That's actually a good idea. But elevate the popcorn. What else can we elevate in there? Yeah.

14:04Bobby Lee:Well, they do. At Lemley's, they have a full bar, which I think is insane that you can just get like a cocktail with it, which I thought was kind of crazy. That's nice. No drinking, but still. Yeah. Garrett's is good. I see that. You got to elevate the popcorn, man. We got to move on up. Yeah, let's move on the popcorn. We're running thin on that. And also then the snacks, the snacks though, So the snack game is very, what's Williams Sonoma? What's this? Opal pop?

14:25Khalyla Kuhn:$50 popcorn.

14:26Bobby Lee:And Bobby's going to love it. Yeah, that's it. What is that? Williams and Sonoma makes Sonoma popcorn gift set. No, no. That's the bowl thing you're paying for. Oh, I see. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Glad I didn't get it. Yeah. This guy was just going to buy it. Is there elevated corn? Google, is there elevated corn? I'm really getting into this. We're trying to get to the next level of popcorn. Yeah, yeah. It starts with the corn. Cave corn. Ooh, there can be elevated, significantly taller corn. No, that's not what we're talking about. Is there fancy corn? Is there fancy corn? Is there Andres corn? Yeah, organic fancy corn.

14:59Bobby Lee:Is there? Yes, there is fancy corn. Yeah. It's referred to cornmeal multicolored. Indian corn. Oh, yeah, Indian corn is fancy. We need Indian corn. We need Indian popcorn.

15:06Khalyla Kuhn:Because they're different colors.

15:08Bobby Lee:They're going to be mad at us for appropriating that as well. Yeah, yeah. Look at that. There's Indian corn.

15:11Khalyla Kuhn:Yeah, you use Indian corn cave butter. Indian corn with cave butter. Right? Imagine. I just sounded like John F. Kennedy. Imagine. Imagine. Imagine. So Indian popcorn with cave butter. With cave butter and also all the fixings. And sea salt. And sea salt. Dude, that's what I'm saying. Elevate the shit. Kosher sea salt. Yeah, dude. Imagine. Wow.

15:37Bobby Lee:Imagine. Imagine. We can elevate the menu at a movie theater. I don't know, dude. It's time. It's time, dude. I will say those Coke machines they have now have every flavor of everything on earth, and it's fucking amazing.

15:49Khalyla Kuhn:I refuse to do the flavors.

15:51Bobby Lee:You're out of your fucking mind. I refuse it. Cherry Coke is phenomenal.

15:55Khalyla Kuhn:If you get a diet fucking Coke and you put a sugary cherry thing, it defeats the purpose of the diet part of it. You're still getting sugar. What do you mean? They do fake sugar.

16:04Bobby Lee:Yeah, they do fake sugar now. They do aspartame versions of all of it.

16:07Khalyla Kuhn:Oh, really? So it's not real sugar?

16:08Bobby Lee:No, it's fake.

16:09Khalyla Kuhn:Okay, well, then I'll do lime. You have them both. Yeah, they have both.

16:12Bobby Lee:Look at all the options. I want one of those at my house. Yeah, that's a great thing. That's one of those things. Like I had a friend in high school who was like a who's a super rich kid and we go over to his house. in his basement he had a coke bottle machine we could get coke by the bottle oh my god you hit it if it dispense we drink like nine cokes a day oh my god

16:27Khalyla Kuhn:my colleague Culkin movie where he gets a million dollars Brewster's millions puts the McDonald's

16:32Bobby Lee:yeah the McDonald's in your house yeah I was hankering this morning by the way for a sausage egg McMuffin I almost went to Mac D's for one sausage egg McMuffin's is the best thing in the fucking world I think so too it's so fucking good amen dude you slide that hash brown inside I don't do that no no You don't put the hash brown inside the sausage. No, but I love the sausage. It'll change your life. It won't change my life. I'm telling you. Why eat it separately? Why eat it out of it?

16:56Khalyla Kuhn:So if I do that, the light, it'll turn completely bright. And I'll have a spiritual awakening. What the fuck are you talking about?

17:03Bobby Lee:You'll see in color for the first time.

17:05Khalyla Kuhn:Yeah, no, I don't think so, but I think it'll be good. It's phenomenal. Okay.

17:08Bobby Lee:Here's what you do. You want a real little secret topper? They sell Taco Bell hot sauce now in the grocery store, which my fridge has five of them in there right now. Honestly, of all the hot sauce - Diablo? They sell the fire. You can get hot, fire. Look, there they are. Taco Bell hot sauce sold in the store, in the bottle. We buy that shit. I put that on everything. It's good? That on breakfast. Do you not like Taco Bell hot sauce? It's so good. It's in the packet. I don't really think about it.

17:34Khalyla Kuhn:Oh, brother. Really brother. When you go to Taco Bell, you don't use it? I use Diablo or fire, yeah, but I don't think, oh, this is amazing hot sauce.

17:40Bobby Lee:Oh, no, no, no. It's not that it's amazing. It's the flavor is just good. Well, the flavor's okay. But I put that on my breakfast sandwiches. Oh, you do? and you know what yeah i bet i bet it is yeah it's a kiss on the mouth yeah do you ever do the taco this guy's selling 50 hot sauce packets that's so funny that's funny i bet you people buy

17:55Khalyla Kuhn:it do you do the breakfast burrito at mcdonald's too or no i've never done the breakfast burrito

18:00Bobby Lee:yeah i'm too scared it's a tube a tube of fear i don't like it yeah yeah yeah yeah i call it a tube of fear i don't like it but this is the thing mcdonald's has been switching up their menu a little bit with introducing new items they're risky and some of the new ones i'm not their chicken menu is getting too big slow down with all the chicken amen give me mcdonald's new menu yeah i went we went the other week and i thought you guys need to slow down go back to the basics dude they got new shit on there that i'm just not like chicken strips get the fuck out of here it's nuggets or nothing dude it's nuggets or nothing what's a new what's new on there new edition boo buckets oh boo boy wait tiny tan happy meal that's for the philippines only isn't

18:40Khalyla Kuhn:it tiny tan wow there's a meetup in los angeles for tiny tan yeah for parents i guess can we go

18:46Bobby Lee:back to the movie um top popcorn real quick look at this special edition special edition gold sauce yeah all right what's what do you want to do with the popcorn we already got no i'm just saying

18:55Khalyla Kuhn:so i went to see that movie um with the date we got a large popcorn a small bottle of smart water not needed but go ahead why waste of money okay anyway um that's what we got yeah and a diet coke 30 bucks.

19:10Bobby Lee:Oh, yeah. Well, it's a fucking...

19:11Khalyla Kuhn:How much are they making off of that?

19:13Bobby Lee:Can you imagine how much our fancy Indian corn cave butter is going to be? 80 bucks a bucket. We're never going to be able to source it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wow. We're going to be ripping people off. Yeah. But the movie we can make cheaper because we won't... What we'll do is we'll run a bunch of... You know, previews will be an hour and a half to pay for the Indian corn.

19:33Khalyla Kuhn:Okay, yeah, yeah.

19:34Bobby Lee:So you'll have an hour of previews. Movie theaters make almost no money with the movie. They make all their money with concessions, but they also make money using the previews, right? Don't they have to pay to have those previews put in front of those films? Is that not true? Yeah.

19:46Khalyla Kuhn:But have you smuggled in stuff? I have, and they don't give a shit. What do you mean? That was my whole life. Yeah, yeah. The only reason I do it now is because I'm just,

19:53Bobby Lee:timing wise, I don't feel like bringing shit in. Yeah. But I would say the majority of people still sneak in food and you shouldn't sneak because it's a teenager ripping tickets. He doesn't give a fuck. You think a 16 year old is going to be like, sir, what's in your packets? Yeah, they don't do that. He doesn't fucking care.

20:07Khalyla Kuhn:It's mostly coffee You sneak in coffee? Yeah like an iced venti something Put it in your No I do this This right And I do one of these I hand the ticket like this

20:23Bobby Lee:Yeah they'll never see that when you walk around Can you see it now? Well I'm just on this angle now

20:28Khalyla Kuhn:You think you can spin around to this side?

20:30Bobby Lee:He can hear the ice jingle jangling in that cup

20:32Khalyla Kuhn:It's basically on the walk dude I have a limp dude Yeah and I go Here you go Right Smart And then when they're I always keep You always have to keep eye contact Got it Right here you go

20:42Bobby Lee:What if there's an employee behind you

20:44Khalyla Kuhn:Sir

20:48Khalyla Kuhn:Yeah You gotta cup it You sneak in coffee Yeah Cause in high school I used to blow cigarettes I was good at cupping the cigarette Oh Yeah you're just walking down the hallway You're right Oh yeah cupping the smoke I know how to cup that I know there's smoke But they thought I was Asian I was doing some sort of You know what I mean Like street fighter thing all you can or whatever you know what i mean yeah yeah but yeah that's smart yeah i'm very

21:10Bobby Lee:smart with my hands my friend sarah and i used to sneak in 40s she'd just bring in a big purse in college and sneak in 40s that's college days dude the good old days yeah sneaking a 40 in the movie theater actually the fans down below comment the craziest thing you've snuck into the movie theater because i'm actually curious to know who snuck in some wild yeah like what do you think the biggest thing you could put something down your pants if it's long yeah you know what i mean yeah Well, I mean, if you have like a fucking, if it's like a big thing, you just put it in your pants. They don't care.

21:36Bobby Lee:Jackets, by the way. Midwest, we don't have that out here. When winter comes, you can sneak in a fucking entire kitchen into a movie theater.

21:41Khalyla Kuhn:Have you ever peed in the movie?

21:47Bobby Lee:Into what? The bucket? No, on the ground. You're just pissed on the ground? One time I did. It goes that way. What? It just goes away from you. Because it was back in the early 80s. Yeah, back when it was normal. Yeah, it was normal back in the 80s. Yeah.

21:59Khalyla Kuhn:Do you remember the movie? Evil Dead. Evil Dead Yeah yeah That was not the 80s Yeah it was like late 70s You didn't want to miss a minute That was a kid I remember And my friend My cousin Jennifer Because here's what We went to the movie There was Empire Strikes Back playing And Evil Dead And I was like Can we do Empire Strikes Back And she was like older She said no we're doing Evil You already saw Empire Strikes Back See a double feature dude Yeah so I was No we Our parents We only had two hours Okay So anyway we went in there Right and just to make her mad I peed on the ground And I remember It ruined the movie for her She fucking hated it But anyway I didn't have that time yet You never done that?

22:33Khalyla Kuhn:No Okay Never peed in a theater Blue Chew

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25:00Bobby Lee:For additional terms and responsible gaming resources, see dkng.co slash audio limited time offer. Turn it up. Storm has zero sugar and 200 milligrams of caffeine. So you can turn that workout up a notch. Good energy in, good energy out. Energy for life. Also, I saw a sign yesterday that bugged me to no end. They had a... Okay. It's one of these like progressive places, but they're trying way too hard. It had a men's bathroom and a women's bathroom, right? So it literally said M, men, W, women. Then below that on each door had an image of... And you've seen this before. It's like half man, half a dress.

25:42Bobby Lee:And then it says... And then a disabled icon. And it says, whatever, just wash your hands.

25:47Khalyla Kuhn:so I was like so what is it you know that that's that's the symbol that one right there gender

25:54Bobby Lee:neutral it was a gender neutral so it had that below the other sign that already said man or woman so it's like just say fucking bathroom this is what say bathroom then it's it's the guy that's

26:04Khalyla Kuhn:doing the signs the guy that's doing no just listen to the no just listen fuck the guy that

26:11Bobby Lee:that made these signs.

26:12Khalyla Kuhn:Yeah, yeah, no, it's not that sign, it's this, okay? That, the original one is the men's one, right? Yeah. And then somebody at the meeting said, hey, we need new signs. I don't think that's what they said. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Bro, you know, it's 2025, bro, we need fucking new signs, right? Well, Pedro, I don't think we're trusting, you're a line cook. But let me tell you something, I bought the new signs on Amazon, right? But you know what? I'm gonna keep the old sign on. Just in case. yeah yeah no because he's lazy ah yeah nothing because that i think because the character's mexican see i think i'm just saying he's like i'm just gonna put this sign underneath the old sign right right yeah you know but you know they'll get it they'll get it but then santino comes along

26:56Bobby Lee:and goes i don't like that i don't just say bathroom by the way they should all just say bathroom then that's the deal if you're gonna keep doing this game just say fucking bathroom and it should you know what the signs should say if you're a guy lift the fucking seat up and piss and put it down when you're done. That's what the sign should actually say. Don't piss on the seat. Don't be an asshole. And then it's just a place to pee and poop. But you - They should have ones. This is big signage at its back. See the little white head on it? Yeah.

27:23Khalyla Kuhn:What if they have race-specific ones?

27:25Bobby Lee:Oh, that's funny. Race-neutral bathroom?

27:28Khalyla Kuhn:No, just, no. Why don't we just go the reverse way?

27:31Bobby Lee:Oh, just white and black bathrooms?

27:33Khalyla Kuhn:No, and different ones.

27:35Bobby Lee:Oh, you like water fountains like that too? What else do you want to do? You want schools to be only one color? No, because can I say something?

27:41Khalyla Kuhn:For Asians, right? We like lower, you know, toilets. You need lower sinks. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And lower things. You know what I mean? We like, you know.

27:49Bobby Lee:Yeah, we'll make the Asian only.

27:51Khalyla Kuhn:Yeah.

27:52Bobby Lee:I get that.

27:53Khalyla Kuhn:What would the black one have in it?

27:56Bobby Lee:Well, it'd be taller. That's for sure. On average. Go back to that picture.

28:00Khalyla Kuhn:It'd be graffiti.

28:05Bobby Lee:It's an art. Oh, my God, dude. Did you see that video of that girl that fucking had a panic attack parasailing and then unclipped her shit?

28:12Khalyla Kuhn:Did she die?

28:13Bobby Lee:Oh, big time.

28:14Khalyla Kuhn:Oh.

28:15Bobby Lee:Oh, fucking big time.

28:16Khalyla Kuhn:Big time died?

28:17Bobby Lee:Look at it.

28:18Khalyla Kuhn:Her?

28:19Bobby Lee:What the fuck? That's not it. Oh, there it is. There's the footage. So she's like, she's freaking out. She's freaking out and then she unclips the fucking harness. Why? Because she's having a panic attack. You don't see anything gruesome here. She just disappears. But look, she gets out of it. She takes off the jacket. she must be having a severe look at how high she is this poor girl she gets out of the harness and is like no i don't want to be here anymore and then gone it's like tom cruise yeah well that that turns out that mission was possible i mean mission complete that's insane i don't know why she would do that she must have had a crazy panic attack by the way these things are all these things are fucking atrocious how many times a year do you hear these accidents they go down kids go down to mexico and he's seeing some fucking wild shit happens with parasailing it's it's a terrible they're so dumb they're can you see if she died she did die dude it just said that in the article oh my god but did she know she was gonna die i think if you're 200 feet up you'd know you're gonna die then why would she do that i think she had a penalty 60 accidents injuries and fatalities over one death for 100 000 trips let me tell you something if one in one every worth it that that's not that's not no one in 100 ,000 is worth it there's no exact number of parasailing deaths per year you know why?

29:39Bobby Lee:because they all happen in Mexico and they don't fucking report it

29:42Khalyla Kuhn:if there was a roller coaster and they go one in every 100 ,000 people die on this would you go on a roller coaster?

29:47Bobby Lee:that's why I do roller coasters because it's not one in roller coasters is probably like one in every fucking hundred million

29:52Khalyla Kuhn:yeah

29:52Bobby Lee:it never happens

29:54Khalyla Kuhn:but it puts more fear into the roller coaster that's what makes it funner right Carlos? come on that's not what makes it more funner

29:59Bobby Lee:I mean two to four that's not enough to get my blood going that's not even fatalities half the time just accidents health the fatalities from these accidents are often guest health issues right like heart attack people have heart attack or stroke you should drive fast on the freeway and turn your lights off for two seconds

30:15Khalyla Kuhn:yeah exciting okay yeah i do that sometimes because i've always like these girls they have

30:20Bobby Lee:all this dash footage of these girls texting and flipping their cars that is some of the funniest

30:25Khalyla Kuhn:shit because i have a morbid morbid fantasy of creating a water park but it's everyone dies on each ride oh like i have a water wait till word gets out about it i have a water slide where you go in a tube but it gets smaller and smaller oh my god that's like my nightmare you get stuck right but the water's still flowing oh other people you know me hop you're right oh yeah yeah so that's one of them death trap water slide yeah welcome to death trap park you don't have

30:50Bobby Lee:thoughts like that absolutely not what's wrong with me i don't know yeah well you know nate bargotsi's making a theme park maybe you can pitch this theme park yeah at nateland you could die in the water park uh exactly numbers aren't there are specifically a few fatalities annual in the u.s water parks drowning is a significant risk by the way no this has got to be fucked up too every year a kid dies at those wave pools every year a kid dies at one of these wave pools because they get stuck in the thing they can't swim wave pools are sick though they're sick they're so fun yeah you know what you and i got to go to at least one time look at yeah look at at the wave pool.

31:25Bobby Lee:Would you go in that?

31:25Khalyla Kuhn:I don't think you would go in there. No. I've been to pools with you. If there's one person in it, sometimes you're like, I'm not going in there.

31:30Bobby Lee:That's true. I don't want to go in if there's one person in the pool. I want it to be quiet.

31:33Khalyla Kuhn:Yeah.

31:34Bobby Lee:That, that, that's, that is a, this is genuinely, that's an anxiety attack. That's where you pull out the chute. I can't do that. Also rest in peace to that girl. I wasn't making fun of her. I was saying that's crazy. The poor girl had a panic attack and jumped.

31:47Khalyla Kuhn:How much SARS is in that water?

31:52Bobby Lee:That's where COVID. There's got to be SARS in there. It really started at a wave pool. Oh man, I saw a funny meme online of the kid of Ron Weasley. I don't know, I can't remember the actor's name. Yeah. Of yelling, it was like he was holding gasoline in the air. Yeah, what did he say?

32:10Khalyla Kuhn:Expensive petroleum.

32:11Bobby Lee:Expense, yeah, what does he say? This is a great.

32:28Khalyla Kuhn:dude that is he's ron weasley 24 7 that guy dude that's amazing killer that's so funny but that's almost almost like a wand he pulled up there yeah that's why he did it wow that's so fun

32:38Bobby Lee:expensive petroleum god he's so good what a brilliant thing to do play into the bit though so good man oh I got bad news for you too your boy Diddy just got 50 months I know does he go to your

32:50Khalyla Kuhn:meetings at Ron Weasley or no he hasn't been in years yeah he doesn't look showing up to your meetings lately Kathy Griffin

32:56Bobby Lee:is there she leaves it Kara Top look at the picture that they put up of Diddy bending over on the stool did you see that they're like man they did Diddy wrong they drew him like bent over the stool crying 50 months yeah that one that second one yeah yeah they were like they did

33:13Khalyla Kuhn:him wrong in the court drawing isn't that a good time though i mean he was gonna get way worse right he should have gotten he shouldn't got like 40 years i think four years he got off you say 50

33:23Bobby Lee:months is that the truth is that what it was four months four months they cut that in half he'll get

33:28Khalyla Kuhn:out earlier yes time served time served and all that stuff yeah yeah probably get out in fucking two and a half years yeah and then would you go to the next diddy party when he gets out oh yeah Yeah. Look at how good it's going to be. How do you get invited to those? I've never been to one.

33:40Bobby Lee:How do you get invited to those? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know.

33:42Khalyla Kuhn:Yeah, I don't, yeah. You know, let me, who would get invited first, you or me?

33:46Bobby Lee:Oh, brother.

33:47Khalyla Kuhn:You. Carlos. Oh, Carlos first.

33:50Bobby Lee:Buddy, you and I don't get invited to any parties. I know. But I wonder what I would wear. To a Diddy party? Yeah. Get a suit? You want easy access to your tush. Maybe one of those assless chaps. Yeah. You know, with a little flap. I would be nervous. To a Diddy party? Yeah. imagine he is gonna throw a party when he gets out you do know that to be sick it's gonna be carlos it's gonna be sick sick it's gonna be would you rather go to a diddy party or a cosby party oh no diddy because i want to remember it

34:21Bobby Lee:no recollection yeah i just woke up in my car the next day i didn't like it when he made those kids walk to fucking brooklyn for cheesecake that's like the first time i actually hated him you don't even know the reference i'm making no i don't did he did a show called uh was it making the band or whatever the what was the name of his show the band making the band and he would he would make them go on these missions right and they had to go do shit for him and he had to make one time he made them walk i want to say it was across brooklyn bridge for cheesecake making that's not a like that's not a proof of that your loyalty cheesecake though it was phenomenal cheesecake yeah i did it depends on what kind of cheesecake it is no there's no cheesecake that Now, if it was tiramisu, we have a totally different conversation.

35:01Bobby Lee:Yeah. But tiramisu is undoubtedly the best. Are they being televised? Yeah, it was on MTV.

35:05Khalyla Kuhn:Well, then yeah, do it.

35:06Bobby Lee:I don't do it. I knew you would agree with this. I know, see? TV guy. I knew you would agree with this method of doing cheesecake.

35:11Khalyla Kuhn:Well, no, it's basically like this. It's like when Leo was on The Revenant, right? He was out there in the cold. Yeah.

35:17Bobby Lee:That's so different than this. It's not.

35:19Khalyla Kuhn:It's not.

35:21Bobby Lee:You do the job! Leo was in character. Yeah, and these kids are in the character. They're not in character.

35:26Khalyla Kuhn:I'm playing the fucking cheesecake guy. You're the cheesecake guy You're the cheesecake guy dude No you are What do you mean by that? What do you want on it? I don't like cheesecake Why would I be the cheesecake guy? What I'm saying though is if the cameras are rolling And they're playing a role You're a reality show guy If the cameras are rolling It's like get the cheesecake Haven't you done this with someone where you made them get you breakfast burritos At like 5 in the morning? Yeah but I pay them good Who got you breakfast burritos? Like Alex and stuff I'll call Alex and go Because there's some breakfast burritos that don't deliver So you say go get it for me Yeah And they get it Yeah Crazy What do you get?

36:05Khalyla Kuhn:100 bucks? Lucky Boys in Pasadena You've been there? Mm-mm Lucky Boys Pasadena has the best breakfast burritos in LA Look it up I want to see what they're doing And they don't deliver So sometimes I'll call somebody and go Yo, I'll give you$100 Go down to Pasadena Give me a Lucky Boys fucking breakfast burrito Do you get cheese fries with it? yeah get the whole thing that looks good the best thing about see that's the key you get you have the breakfast burrito right to your right it's the perfect amount of everything

36:35Bobby Lee:dispersed eggs cheese bacon sausage yeah hash browns and that's it yes and look at to the left

36:43Khalyla Kuhn:the best ranch sauce with the best hot sauce and you duck them together yeah i know you don't get the cheese chili cheese fries that's no i don't get that i i can only eat one lucky boy one lucky

36:54Bobby Lee:boy burrito burrito yeah yeah and that's 900 calories my second favor that's a big burrito yeah is the um corner cottage where the fuck is that in burbank they deliver get the corner

37:08Khalyla Kuhn:cottage breakfast burrito that's my second second favorite my third favorite is koufax koufax is good yeah they've been good for years yeah and if you don't have an opinion about breakfast burrito don't be my friend all right do you have an opinion about it i tell you who's

37:24Bobby Lee:a pretty good ass breakfast burrito is uh right here um up at sportsman's lodge it's called uh everyone has a good one no no what's the what's the spot that's civil coffee they have a good fucking breakfast burrito i like that you know why i like that they have chunky potatoes i like those big cute i don't know man oh look at that thing yeah yeah oh look at the big chunky i like big chunky fucking potatoes baby give me chunky potatoes look at that thing stop making that fucking noise and look at wait and look at but zoom in and look at yeah and look at and look at the fry oil because you can still see through the burrito yeah by the way as soon as i eat that lucky boy fucking burrito

38:10Khalyla Kuhn:As soon as I eat that, my stomach. Lucky boys. Me with lucky boys. Okay? That's me with lucky boys. I'll kiss the burrito. I'll fuck the burrito. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You want me to fuck a burrito, dude? I don't. Okay. That's your move. All right, my bad, dude. YouTube, but I get it. I get it. All right, yeah. We get it. If there are places in LA where you get the best of something, you know what I mean? That's why the city is still holding up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What should we be for Halloween this year? The girl from Silent Hill F. Oh, that looks like you. Yeah. I've been playing that game. No, I haven't started yet.

38:46Khalyla Kuhn:I have. I've been playing it. I'm going to give up. I've died 15 times already. I was going to say, it looks really hard. I don't want to deal with that right now. Can I tell you what's hard? There's only two modes. Story and hard. So story is like too easy? No, story is too hard. I don't even know what hard is like. Fuck that then. All right. In the beginning of the game, you're stuck in this small little Japanese town. Yeah. Okay. And all of a sudden, there's these creatures that come out with a knife. It's fucking scary as fuck. What's the name of the game? Silent Hill F.

39:24Bobby Lee:I'm ready for some fucking Halloween shit. Are we going to go to a haunted house?

39:27Khalyla Kuhn:Oh, yeah. Let's do it. You see that creature? Yeah. They're like - Is that Ali Wong? Yeah. Ali Wong's that. You play Ali Wong. and you're the first 20 minutes game you're just dodging like running from them and you can hear them chase you it's so petrifying scary and there's no it's all melee weapons so you eventually you pick up a pole like that yeah or yeah or something like that or like a pipe and you're fighting these creatures with a pipe it's so hard it's too hard it's so fucking hard but it is beautiful and it's pretty scary bad friends halloween what are we going to be for halloween Yeah, I was just writing it on my notes.

40:07Bobby Lee:Okay. Bad Bunny. Oh, yeah. People are mad at Bad Bunny for doing the Super Bowl. Is that what it is?

40:11Khalyla Kuhn:He was so good on SNL.

40:13Bobby Lee:Yeah, dude. He's the man. He's the man. What's the issue? Go ahead. You're a Spaniard. What's the issue with Bad Bunny playing the Super Bowl?

40:18Khalyla Kuhn:I think people don't like that he speaks Spanish. Only Spanish.

40:22Bobby Lee:What percentage of America speaks Spanish? He speaks English.

40:25Khalyla Kuhn:Yeah, like me.

40:27Bobby Lee:Right. Bad English. Doesn't matter. 15 % of the 14 % of the 45 million people speak Spanish. A lot of people will get it.

40:36Khalyla Kuhn:Me encanto bailar.

40:38Bobby Lee:I think Bad Bunny is the fucking -

40:41Khalyla Kuhn:Y la escuela. Y la escuela los españoles.

40:42Bobby Lee:Y la biblioteca.

40:44Khalyla Kuhn:Yeah, yeah. We should do a Bad Friends Spanish edition.

40:46Bobby Lee:And try to speak only in Spanish? Good luck.

40:48Khalyla Kuhn:Well, how do you say Bad Friends in Spanish?

40:50Bobby Lee:Malos amigos.

40:52Khalyla Kuhn:Malos amigos. Malos amigos. Hey, welcome to Malos Amigos.

40:55Bobby Lee:Dude, that was one thing that Leo did right in that movie, was he got the Spanish shit right. When he was vibing with those dudes,

41:03Khalyla Kuhn:you could tell he they loved him shia can do that too with the mexicans he vibes with them oh yeah

41:09Bobby Lee:dude look at that yeah because shia but shia is from from where in la he's from echo park right he can do it and leo yep didn't leo grow up a little bit nicer los filas area a little bit

41:19Khalyla Kuhn:nicer yeah i i wish that we grew up like in la not me why i like being from chicago it would have been easier i think though well for the business yeah i don't think so but you watch a charlie Machine, right? Documentary in Malibu when Sean Penn and all those guys, neighborhood kids were making films. It started then. I know, but that's a dream.

41:39Bobby Lee:That's a fantasy moment in time. In the same way that like, what are the chances that like the Will Ferrell class of SNL, it's like, these are fantasy moments in time.

41:48Khalyla Kuhn:I want to be in a fantasy moment. I didn't have a fantasy moment.

41:51Bobby Lee:We're living in it right now.

41:52Khalyla Kuhn:Oh, now, yeah. We made bad friends together. Exactly. This is our little fantasy moment. Yeah, but you know, It'd be cool that you're in an avocado field with young Keanu Reeves. You know what I mean? What are you doing out there? What? Avocados at each other. You know what I mean? Cut it out. Yeah, you're like, cut it out, dude. Cut it out, bro. Yeah. Well, it was fucking great. What a great throw, Bobby. You know what I mean? Thank you, Keanu. I'd talk like that too. I would probably talk like that too, dude. Because Keanu Reeves would influence me. Yeah. It's like, bro, dude, fucking fantastic.

42:24Khalyla Kuhn:You got an A in geometry, dude. Now you just sound like your brother. I know. That sounds like Stevie. Yeah I think it influences you right So it's like you know You grew up with De Niro right Right De Niro Hey you're doing all De Niro Yeah yeah You know If you want me to help you tutor In that biology class I think I'll help you

42:43Bobby Lee:I think you would have been in Goodfellas Don't you think That's really good Yeah I don't want to grow up in LA Don't you have to grow up in San Diego

42:50Khalyla Kuhn:I'm two time Nicky Bob

42:52Bobby Lee:Two time Nicky Bob Yeah Two time Nicky Bob

42:56Khalyla Kuhn:I see Nicky Bob twice every time. Nicky Bob, Nicky Bob. That's why they call me two times. Okay. What do you mean?

43:06Bobby Lee:No, I like it, Nicky Bob. Nicky Bob, Nicky Bob. Nicky Bob, Nicky Bob. That's right. That's two times Nicky Bob. You always say everything twice.

43:12Khalyla Kuhn:Yeah, everything twice.

43:14Bobby Lee:What's your name? Say it again. What's your name? What's your name? I'm Slippery Santeens. Yeah. Do the slides. Do the slide. Cops never caught me. Slippery Santeens. Yeah. As I sneak through. As he sneaks through, as he sneaks through. It's actually pretty good. It's pretty good. Pretty good, pretty good. You would have grown up in LA. Okay, you would have grown up in Koreatown. Here's your life.

43:39Khalyla Kuhn:Yeah, yeah.

43:40Bobby Lee:You're working, you're fucking busing at Seoul Park. Yeah. You're busing tables. You're still going to take your same route. You're going to get mad TV. Like, nothing's going to change.

43:52Khalyla Kuhn:Oh, you think that no matter where I was, I was always going to end up here.

43:56Bobby Lee:Or are you going to be on a roof during the riots?

43:57Khalyla Kuhn:I'm a rooftop Korean for sure.

43:59Bobby Lee:For 100%. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I'm at that Carl Jr. drive-thru like, what is going on? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You would have been Bobby Lee no matter where you were placed in the world. You were born to be Bobby Lee. Yeah. You were going to be you. And that's what we love about you.

44:12Khalyla Kuhn:Oh, so those fantasies aren't real.

44:14Bobby Lee:They're bullshit. You're living a fantasy. You live a dream. We get to talk to our fans and do stand-up. This is the best dream we've ever lived.

44:21Khalyla Kuhn:Yeah. I don't ever want to wake up. But it would be great. You're in Echo Park. like Shia is like, hey, let's go duck hunting. You think he's going to be friends with you? You think you would have been his clique?

44:28Bobby Lee:I think Shia would have liked me because he liked me. Okay. He likes you now. All right. Chances of becoming famous are extremely slim. Shia has less than 0.01 % of the global population.

44:37Khalyla Kuhn:And he's still not happy.

44:38Bobby Lee:He's still not happy.

44:39Khalyla Kuhn:I'm so happy and so grateful. You just wish you were from LA. No, but when you watch that movie, Charlie Sheen, it's just like, what an exciting life. You know what I mean?

44:48Bobby Lee:Yeah, but he lived under the guise of famous parents. So it like ushered him into the world naturally. Like I told you that documentary I love, Battered Bastards of Baseball. It's great.

44:58Khalyla Kuhn:Battered Bastards of Baseball. Battered Bastards of Baseball.

45:00Bobby Lee:There it is. There's Nicky two times.

45:04Khalyla Kuhn:Rocket Money. Rocket Money is a personal finance app that helps find and cancel your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings.

45:15Bobby Lee:That's right. Look, we all have way too many subscriptions. This is an old point that we've made so many times on this show. Bobby saved so much money by doing this. And by the way, Rocket Money's 5 million members have saved a total of 500 million in canceled subscriptions, with members saving up to$740 a year when they use all the app's premium features.

45:31Khalyla Kuhn:Get alerts if your bills increase in price, if there's unusual activity in your accounts, if you're close to going over budget.

45:38Bobby Lee:Rocket Money will even try to negotiate to lower your bills for you. This app automatically scans your bills to find opportunities to save and then goes to work to get you better deals. They even talk to customer service. You don't want to talk to them. They're going to do it for you. You do not have to. Bobby had the dashboard and it laid out his total financial picture. So they They include bill due dates and paydays. And it's easier to digest that way, the way they lay it out. Some of us are visual learners like Bob and I. You can automatically create custom budgets based on your past spending.

46:02Bobby Lee:So they're trying to help you save your money. Stop wasting it.

46:06Khalyla Kuhn:Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to rocketmoney.com slash badfriends today. You heard it.

46:13Bobby Lee:That's rocketmoney.com slash badfriends. Rocketmoney.com slash badfriends. Shopify. Hey, if you're running a small business, you know there's nothing small about it. There's a lot going on. And as business owners, we provide merch for you guys. And the Shopify point of sale system is a unified command center for your retail businesses. It brings together in-store and online operations across up to a thousand locations.

46:37Khalyla Kuhn:Imagine being able to guarantee that shopping is always convenient. Endless aisles shipped to customer by online pickup in-store. all made simpler so customers can shop how they want and staff have the tools to close the sale every time.

46:52Bobby Lee:And let's face it, acquiring new customers is expensive. With Shopify POS, you can keep shoppers coming back with personalized experiences and first-party data that give marketing teams a competitive edge. In fact, it's proven. Based on a report from EY Business on Shopify POS, see real results like 22 % better total cost of ownership and benefits equivalent to an 8.9 % uplift in sales on average relative to the market set surveyed in Wii U, Shopify and you must if you're running a business. Bob, tell them how to get it.

47:18Khalyla Kuhn:We love Shopify and we've been using it since our inception and we love it. Get all the big stuff for your small businesses right with Shopify. Sign up for your $1 per month trial and start selling today at shopify.com slash badfriends.

47:31Bobby Lee:Go to shopify.com slash badfriends. That's shopify.com slash badfriends. Oh, that? I could be that for Halloween. Yes.

47:38Khalyla Kuhn:Yeah, that's great.

47:40Bobby Lee:Shave my beard like that? A little Fu Manchu? Yeah. Where are the

47:44Khalyla Kuhn:name fu manchu come from i don't know man asia it's a real guy is fu manchu a real guy it's a

47:52Bobby Lee:guy yeah come on you don't know that to be a fact we're just guessing the name fu fu manchu was invented by british author arthur wilde writing as a sex ro sax roamer 1913 a series of novels about a sinister chinese villain bobby lee becoming the embodiment of the yellow peril bobby lee uh the specific name likely comes from the generic chinese surname fu historical ethnic group manchu creating an exotic and threatening identity for the character. So is Fu Manchu going to be X out of our vernacular now because it's un-PC? It's funny because people still call it Fu Manchu. Isn't that called a Fu Manchu?

48:26Bobby Lee:Yeah, right?

48:27Khalyla Kuhn:Those guys probably just aren't people

48:29Bobby Lee:who would change how they talk. The character name originated from Arthur Ward.

48:33Khalyla Kuhn:I like Yellow Peril.

48:34Bobby Lee:Yellow Peril is a great name for your special. Yeah, yeah. Yellow Peril? Yeah, that's good. Are you ready to tape? Are you getting close? No. Come on. I'm not. You're not at all close.

48:44Khalyla Kuhn:But when Hula goes, this is the amount of time we expect. I'm like, okay, I got it. It's an hour, right? No.

48:53Bobby Lee:What do they expect out of you?

48:53Khalyla Kuhn:40 minutes. You're doing just 40? I'm going to do more, but I mean, that's the long. I have 40, so then I'm like, okay. You want to do the least possible. Yeah, I'm doing least possible. Smart. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

49:05Bobby Lee:Bang for your buck.

49:06Khalyla Kuhn:And then the next one is going to be great. Because I'll clean slate. I'm going to walk on and say, I just can figure it out. I genuinely think you'll never do another one. I think one is good. No, I'm going to do another one. I have to.

49:16Bobby Lee:Why?

49:16Khalyla Kuhn:Because there's more personal things I want to talk about, about how I really feel that I don't do. And I want to go in. Why are you smirking? Because it's all like a pipe dream because you were trying to show off for Louis. Like, oh, after this special, I promise I'll really get into the depths of comedy. And, you know. Okay. You know, my whole life has been this. I believe in you. No, this is what I'm being real. My whole life has been, you can't do it. I'm not one of those people. My whole life has been this. Don't say me. You can't do it. It's not going to happen. This and that. And I always do it.

49:52Khalyla Kuhn:And I always prevail. And I can't wait. And then when that happens. I would love that. I can look at you and go, what's up? I would love that. And then you're going to be like, well, I never said that. Right. And then we're going to have another conflict. All right. You'll see moment. It's actually just. You'll see is my whole, the whole reason why I'm even where I'm at.

50:10Bobby Lee:It's a good thing to bring up, you'll see. Because that was my favorite phrase when we were in Australia. Bobby's first thing out of his mouth, I'm going to be jacked. I'm going to get so jacked. And I go, no. And you'll see. And I go, no, you won't. And you go, you'll see.

50:21Khalyla Kuhn:Yeah.

50:21Bobby Lee:But we're past a year. You lost the bet. It doesn't matter. The sea hasn't happened.

50:24Khalyla Kuhn:Okay. Yeah, yeah. I'm excited for the sea. When the sea happens, you'll do it. When the tides change. All right. So I went to that fucking gym next to my house, Planet Fitness. I swear to God, I walked in there and I go, can I join? and they're like, well, we need your bank account. Why? I don't know why. I go, I just have a credit card. They say, we don't do it that way. We need your bank account. No, no, no, no, no. That's what they said. I've never heard of that before in my life. I've never heard of that before in my life too. A bank account? Go to Equinox. What? Go to Equinox. So then what I, no, but there's too many hot people there.

50:53Khalyla Kuhn:What's wrong with that? Yeah, I don't want to be slothy in front of those people. You know what I mean? Just get a personal trainer then. Yeah. So then I brought my friend Alex over there. You know my friend Alex that worked for me at Taigi? Yeah. And I didn't know how any of the machines worked either. Right? So once we go, we already went once, he's gonna teach me how the, those machines, you don't even know how to get in them. It's like a pole away and you don't know how to put the stick in. And I don't know what it works.

51:18Bobby Lee:It's like that Japanese game show where they gotta go through those cardboard cut outs on the thing.

51:22Khalyla Kuhn:That's what it's like. Yeah. Yeah, and then every machine works on one thing. Like, I don't want this muscle to be fucking thick. This is a good muscle. Look at this though. Yeah, I know. You don't want that? Yeah, but I don't want that. You don't want that? Yeah, yeah. Or like, you know, my elbow is like gigantic and I'm like, I did this machine too long.

51:38Bobby Lee:All you really need to do is like push-ups, sit-ups, and then, you know, some squatty stuff.

51:43Khalyla Kuhn:No, but I want to learn how to do this one, the butterfly one. What the fuck is that? There's one where there's sticks above and you do this. Wait. Well, you do flies? Yeah, and then you do this one, like flies like this, right? Yeah. I want to be able to do it. But even this machine is different. The bench press? yeah just get on a free just go to plant famous it's evolved no they've changed yeah i don't know what the machines do look at the machines that are fucking so complex sound like i'm the kimmy schmidt who has like been buried for like 50 years yeah yeah is he on all the machines see that machine right there i didn't sit on that i went reverse my knees were on that thing right i was staring backwards it would be funny to see a bobby lee workout video trying the machines for the

52:21Bobby Lee:first time yeah like i don't know how to get into that she's in it right now just like that well now Now I know after seeing her. Squat and press. Yeah. So you're not going to be going to Planet Fitness. Why don't you have someone to come to your house to train you from your house? I don't have weights. You don't need much. You can do bands. You can do exercise with so little today.

52:38Khalyla Kuhn:Yeah, maybe. Tomorrow night, I just decided. Just now? No, I just literally decided because I have my pod tomorrow at 4, and then Alex will be there afterwards. I'm going to give him a little money. Go right to the... And I'm going to go right to Planet Fitness. I'm going to finish the training.

52:53Bobby Lee:I thought you couldn't get in without your bank.

52:55Khalyla Kuhn:No, you can do a day pass. That's what I'm gonna do I'm gonna get two day passes I'm gonna figure out how all the machines work I'll even video it I'm being real, I wanna do it I think my thinness isn't good What do you mean? I still look fat You don't look fat No, if you take my shirt off, it's not good What do you mean? It's just lumpy? Andres, I'm so no offense We don't know what he looks like without a shirt I do, no offense dude And none taken? No, I'm taking it. So much offense. He's taking it. No, what I'm saying is that it's, can I be honest with you? No. I'm a pork too. Yeah, you're more like a flan.

53:35Khalyla Kuhn:Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm flan-y. Flan. Yeah, yeah.

53:37Bobby Lee:You're like a flan. Yeah. What's dessert? Name it. We're all desserts. He's flan. What's Carlos? What is it? He's like a churro.

53:46Khalyla Kuhn:No, he's like a baguette. Ooh, yeah. Yeah. A baguette? Yeah. Or dessert, yeah. Nobody wants it.

53:53Bobby Lee:Nobody wants it.

53:54Khalyla Kuhn:Yeah. I'm flaky and, yeah. You have a great body. It's fine. It's up and down. Yeah. But it's pretty good. You can see the muscles.

54:02Bobby Lee:It can be if I - Where they're supposed to be. If I work out.

54:04Khalyla Kuhn:With me and Andreas, no. We don't know what muscles what. That's what I'm saying. I - You get what I'm saying? But he's also - Yeah, yeah, yeah.

54:13Bobby Lee:He's a father now. He has less time to work out. Yeah. Dads have way less time. He's busy. He's either editing, taking care of his kid, or editing. Dad bod. Dad bod life. Dad bod, yeah. And dude, his - Dude, the chicks, especially in our age range, they love dad bods they do yes they fucking do you ask any girl of a of an age that's our range right i'm sure girls in their like 20s don't like dad bods they want young but like 30s and up those

54:40Khalyla Kuhn:girls love dad bods i'm doing it i'm doing it oh i can't wait i'm inspired today you are oh yeah i'm doing it because you're right i did say that by now i would oh yeah and i didn't yeah i did lose the way yeah five weeks no i don't well i'm gonna start tomorrow what can i in five weeks do you think if i start tomorrow in five weeks do you think you'll be able to see the difference if

55:00Bobby Lee:you have to if you go every every like other day yeah you would you have to go like literally three four days a week yeah yeah you're gonna do it yeah yeah i'm gonna do it god i think it's a great day i love this yeah yeah and that who are you doing it for though that's the real question what who

55:13Khalyla Kuhn:are you doing it for spite no i'm doing it because when i when because women find you attractive Yeah. I get giggles when I walk into the Wii Spa steam room. From who? Little Asians? No, from everybody. They giggle because they know who you are. I don't know if that's the case. In my mind, I think it's it, but it could be my Porgy, Andreas-like body.

55:37Khalyla Kuhn:You know he's going to go home and be like, I'm going to quit the show.

55:40Bobby Lee:Or join the gym. Yeah. Are you a member at a gym?

55:44Khalyla Kuhn:No. Yeah.

55:46Bobby Lee:Your wife is, though. Yes. your wife's in phenomenal shape. She works full time, is a full time mom and still has time to go work out. Damn dude. How did you get her?

55:58Khalyla Kuhn:He's funny. Yeah you're a funny guy. You know what I love you. You're right. I see your skill sets. None taken. None taken? Hopefully not. The amount of none taken.

56:09Bobby Lee:He's building all this up to shut us down.

56:11Khalyla Kuhn:Are you offended right now? No. I love you. Yeah. You know that? Deeply. Okay. Fans. Fancy. Does not. Does not buy it. It's emotional abuse. Yeah.

56:22Bobby Lee:Yeah.

56:23Khalyla Kuhn:Is it an emotional abuse? Yeah, I think if you were doing this to your partner, they could record it and show all their friends and they'd be mad at you.

56:29Bobby Lee:Like that Mel Gibson. You should just shut up and blow me. Andres is going to have this on loop in the courtroom. Porg, Porg, Porg.

56:41Khalyla Kuhn:You know, I apologize, dude. I'll use a different reference next time. Okay. Yeah.

56:46Bobby Lee:I think it's just because he loves you We all are mean to each other because we love each other Thank you That's the only reason we do it Have you ever hooked up in the movie theater?

56:56Khalyla Kuhn:No, have you? Oh yeah Well the movie's empty, right? No, people were there You have to watch a bad movie, right?

57:02Bobby Lee:No, I got a hand tug over a coat Underneath a coat Like Gremlins 5 You couldn't fucking Fucking would be impossible I don't think so, dude Where are you fucking Unless no one's in there

57:14Khalyla Kuhn:Like in Germany, there's like on Pornhub videos of like Germans fucking.

57:19Bobby Lee:That's a casted porno. It's not hidden camera.

57:22Khalyla Kuhn:No, it's like a real movie playing in the background.

57:25Bobby Lee:Yeah, but Germans are fucking lunatics.

57:26Khalyla Kuhn:They're lunatics, yeah.

57:27Bobby Lee:Would you fuck me into Seattle?

57:29Khalyla Kuhn:They created two girls, one cup, bud.

57:31Bobby Lee:Oh, yeah.

57:32Khalyla Kuhn:Yeah, yeah.

57:32Bobby Lee:When are they going to add another cup?

57:34Khalyla Kuhn:Yeah.

57:35Bobby Lee:They can't just share that one forever. Yeah, no, I got a handy tug in a movie theater. I thought that was kind of tight.

57:41Khalyla Kuhn:Was there a one girl, one cup? I mean, why'd you go to the second movie first? elevated dude jump it went right to two do part one anyway

57:48Bobby Lee:you know what that reminds me of every time every time somebody brings up two girls one cup I always think about cake farts do you remember cake farts oh cake farts was great one of the best it's so good that was when the internet was really finding itself yeah now it's just evil and fucking dark and sad and nasty and you're like you want to see a guy get killed live on Twitter well look we're going to create our movie theater of Indian corn and cave butter native corn and native corn so please come to our new movie theater and it's called they're gonna be called

58:17Khalyla Kuhn:fancy corner

58:17Bobby Lee:what what's the name of our theater chain we're gonna make a chain of theaters oh yeah you're good at naming things

58:24Khalyla Kuhn:yeah

58:24Bobby Lee:you've always been good

58:25Khalyla Kuhn:there's gotta be a la la there's gotta be make it French you know what I mean la crochet la crochet prefer yeah that's what it's called the preferred crochet the preferred crochet yeah that's it la prefer crochet yeah yeah yeah so please come see

58:40Bobby Lee:the la prefer crochet

58:40Khalyla Kuhn:yeah we'll have fancy native butter not Indian.

58:43Bobby Lee:Sorry, I said that. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

58:45Khalyla Kuhn:We'll have cave butter. Cave butter. All the fixings, right? No smart water. You don't like that. It's bullshit. Yeah, it's bullshit. Okay. And we'll have filtered water. No charge.

58:55Bobby Lee:No charge. And you can pee at your seat. There's little toilets.

58:58Khalyla Kuhn:Yeah.

58:59Bobby Lee:Thank you for being a bad friend.

59:04Bobby Lee:It's called fire and ice.

59:06Khalyla Kuhn:What's up? What is it? It's a move called fire and ice. Go on. You get like Mentos or like some sort of like mouthwash. You make it super like crisp and stuff and you go down on them like a girl does it to a guy.

59:24Bobby Lee:What is this, call her daddy now? What show are we doing?

59:27Khalyla Kuhn:Where's the fire part? The ice. Oh, so it's ice and ice. It's ice and ice.

59:37Bobby Lee:Where's the fire come from? Yeah, where's the fire part? You're saying the menthol and mint makes it hot.

59:44Khalyla Kuhn:Yeah, I got that wrong. But the ice is just super intense, and you go back and forth between the two.

59:48Bobby Lee:One time in high school, this girl, I was... No, wait. Okay. Go ahead.

59:51Khalyla Kuhn:No, I mean, it doesn't make any sense. Hit him. Go ahead, hit him. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I could be remembering the escort ad. Yeah, I think it's just called ice.

59:58Bobby Lee:It sounds like ice and ice.

59:59Khalyla Kuhn:Yeah, yeah. The door fucking flips open, right? There's guys with guns and stuff. Is that what it is?

1:00:06Bobby Lee:Show me your papers. Yeah, yeah, yeah. La, la, la, la, la, la, la. You're just going down on ice agents?

1:00:11Khalyla Kuhn:Ice and ice.

1:00:13Bobby Lee:Yeah.

1:00:14Khalyla Kuhn:No, I promise.

1:00:14Bobby Lee:Have you ever had a bumpkin?

1:00:16Khalyla Kuhn:Oh, wait, what's that again?

1:00:17Bobby Lee:I don't know. It's where you get ahead when you're taking a poop.

1:00:20Khalyla Kuhn:That's right.

1:00:20Bobby Lee:Yeah. That's not a good one. That's not a good one. It's not a good one at all. Yeah. I mean. What do you mean? What do you mean? Nah, it'd be fun.

1:00:28Khalyla Kuhn:I've never had it. It'd be fun. Yeah. It'd be fun. Yeah. I've never had one. A blumpkin? No, not even close.

1:00:38Yeah. Yeah.

1:00:48Yeah.