In short
A fictional UK plot to assassinate the Russian president (codename “Tiberius”) by using a retired UK special forces sergeant as a trusted “freelance” military trainer in China, culminating in an ambush on 3 September 2026 in Beijing/Tianjin. The episode also shows NATO/UN diplomacy over the BA-236 incident, where GPS spoofing and North Sea ship activity (Yantar) allegedly caused a commercial plane crash killing 350.
Guests (as named in transcript)
Miriam Bran (former history teacher; quits over refusing to “radicalise” children against Britain; now “make history”); Sarah Nichols (Herald journalist referenced); Felix Batzing (NATO Secretary General); Dipesh Choudhury (Under Secretary for Defense); Mel Murray (defense figure); Alex Curnoway (UK Prime Minister character); Sergeant Tom McDuff/Duffy (UKSF operative); “Robbo” (visitor/handler figure).
Key claims
BA-236 was deliberate cyber/grey-zone aggression, not a technical fault; NATO must treat it as conventional aggression under UN definitions; the assassination is framed as regime-change prevention and deterrence.
Notable examples
Belgrave Square safehouse seized by the British government; NATO lobby briefing; GPS spoofing “time signatures” leading into “dark fog”; election-night vote swings (Miriam Brand as PM); planned exfil via Tianjin/Bohai Sea; forced public “sexual assault” discharge to justify MOD override.
Written by AI. May contain mistakes. Listen to the episode to check what was said.
Chapters
Tap a time to open that second in VOSetting the Stage for Killing Tiberius
0:12 to 1:06
Discussion of the novel 'Killing Tiberius' and the concept of political assassination.
“How would you kill the president of Russia?”
The Best Soldier and the Plan
1:06 to 1:40
Exploration of Britain's best soldier and the plot surrounding the Russian president.
“They wrote all these novels, it's all shit, it's all Killing Tiberius Having a cigarette Cancer is in my pancreas Not my lungs, Prime Minister The assassin Do we need to get him home?”
Arrival at Belgravia
1:40 to 2:35
Description of Belgravia and the significance of a specific property.
“He accepts freelance strutter gig, as it were, of Cameroon military.”
The Dead Owner and Government Seizure
2:35 to 5:12
Discussion about the deceased owner of a property and its acquisition by the government.
“Belgravia Sergeant, we're heading to Belgravia.”
Miriam Bran's History Lesson
5:12 to 7:02
Miriam Bran discusses her decision to leave teaching history and its implications.
“For one British pound I don't think I'd fit in with the neighbours Then sell it I'd get in trouble for that I was the one who took it from the government I could get in trouble And you want that?”
Listening to the People
7:02 to 8:14
A political figure reflects on listening to constituents and the heart of Britain.
“So, to put it simply, Sarah, I'm here now to make history, not teach it.”
Bypassing the MOD and the Plan's Phases
8:14 to 13:00
Discussion on bypassing the Ministry of Defence and outlining the plan's phases.
“Every morning he cleans the streets of Newbury free of charge.”
The Execution and Exfiltration Plan
13:00 to 14:00
Details on the execution plan and the logistics of exfiltration from China.
“Yantar was most likely parked up by undersea cables, I bet.”
Strategic Military Discussions
14:00 to 16:50
Explore complex military plans involving China and NATO.
“Yeah, they've got Chinese NCOs and that out there, Kenya and that.”
NATO's High-Stakes Summit
16:50 to 20:00
Delve into the tensions and discussions of a critical NATO summit.
“This NATO summit has become possibly one of the most high stakes in recent history.”
Show all 26 chapters
Russia and Cyber Warfare Accusations
20:00 to 23:10
Investigate the implications of Russian actions on NATO and cyber warfare.
“These are the movements of Russian warships in the North Sea.”
A Letter to the UN
23:10 to 23:40
A powerful letter to the UN highlights the urgency of NATO's actions.
“One look out the window and we'd correct course, but we don't.”
Internal NATO Conflicts and Responsibilities
23:40 to 27:30
Discussion on the responsibilities of NATO member states amidst conflicts.
“Letter pursuant to Article 51 of the Charter of the United Nations.”
Personal Moments Amidst Tension
27:30 to 28:00
Light-hearted moments among characters provide contrast to serious discussions.
“I was talking to Fi the other day because I heard James has gone into army.”
Playtime and Family Dynamics
28:00 to 29:30
The characters engage in playful banter about planes and family relationships.
“She says, was Duffy ever one of the PTSD ones?”
Discussing Future Aspirations
29:30 to 32:30
The conversation shifts to aspirations for fatherhood and the costs of IVF.
“I thought me and Dad threw everything out.”
Secrets and Political Tension
32:30 to 37:40
A serious discussion about secrets, political situations, and personal pressures unfolds.
“Christ, can you imagine if I cost Mama 15 grand?”
Election Night and Political Unrest
37:40 to 41:20
The atmosphere of election night is described, highlighting political instability.
“This can't be discussed, and I cannot, absolutely cannot...”
Geopolitical Analysis
41:20 to 42:05
An analysis of China's geography and implications for foreign operations is presented.
“That is absolutely groundbreaking in British politics.”
Navigating the Southeast Sea and Kurnoway Heartlands
42:05 to 43:36
Learn about the geopolitical dynamics of the Southeast Sea and the Kurnoway heartlands amid tensions.
“The Southeast Sea is bordered by the Bohai Sea, leading out towards South Korea and Japan via the Yellow Sea and the East China Sea.”
Paths to Victory: Miriam Brown vs. Alex Kurnoway
43:36 to 45:16
Explore the contrasting electoral strategies and challenges faced by key political figures.
“From a little under 2 ,000 for all right-wing parties combined last time out.”
The Aftermath of the Election Results
45:16 to 46:59
Discuss the implications of the election results for the UK and the political landscape.
“And we are just going to cut away from those scenes in Liverpool-Balton.”
A Conversation with the President of Russia
46:59 to 48:54
Witness a tense exchange between the newly elected Prime Minister and the Russian President.
“this evening have said, that does confirm that Miriam Brand will be the new Prime Minister of the United Kingdom.”
Security Briefings and Political Maneuvering
48:54 to 51:08
Delve into the discussions about national security and political strategies post-election.
“I would have liked to have brought my security too, but he says hello anyway.”
The Weight of Decisions in Political Life
51:08 to 56:00
Examine the moral complexities faced by politicians in high-stakes situations.
“Zambia are the most China-indebted nation from what came forward, sir.”
A Reckoning for Great Britain
56:00 to 57:48
The discussion revolves around the implications of national security and the need for decisive action.
“A year to the date of that crash, they will know what this country is still capable of.”
Transcript
Automatic transcript. May contain errors.0:00This series contains strong language and violence. It is fiction. Resemblance to reality is coincidental. This is Bear Hunt. Previously on Bear Hunt. I wrote three novels. The last one was Killing Tiberius. Killing Tiberius.
0:22Luke Jasztal:How would you kill the president of Russia? What funny little war game are you playing, Bildrun? Asymmetric Lethal Mitigation Advisory ALMA Western intelligence agencies are an orthodoxy For all the zealots you speak with Make sure you find yourself at least one heretic Feasibility study, you say? Exactly that Comparative outcomes, leadership removal, regime decapitation effects London grad is going to sell one final townhouse to the Russians Number 10 Downing Street Consider the strategic partnerships Once again, we are still reading the rules Daniel Marcel They wrote all these novels, it's all shit, it's all Killing Tiberius Having a cigarette Cancer is in my pancreas Not my lungs, Prime Minister The assassin Do we need to get him home?
1:25What's that? It's a novel. The kind of central premise, Tiberius, is the codename for the president of Russia. And the British have a plan to kill him. Which is? Well, they get Britain's best soldier. The Russian president visits China on a guaranteed recurring annual basis. Britain's best soldier. How does he get into China? How does he get a Chinese writer? He accepts freelance strutter gig, as it were, of Cameroon military. Chinese infrastructure. It baits the Chinese to hire the standout Brit. Robbo, if I was to ask you who Britain's best soldier was, would you have an answer? I would, sir.
2:07I would. You need to do a little dispersing yourself, Sergeant McDuff. Do I now? Somebody wants you back home.
2:25You're my soldier are you? Sergeant Tom McDuff, Duffy, Pilgrimmore, where are we headed? Belgravia Sergeant, we're heading to Belgravia.
2:43Luke Jasztal:And we have the lower ground floor. Swimming pool, sauna, gym through those glass doors. And a cinema suite. Just a little garage for my tastes. Aye, very nice. Who's, or what country exactly is the owner? because the Bahraini flag is fluttering on the veranda next door. That would be number 30, Belgrave Square. That's the Bahrainian embassy. Yeah, I got that. So, what's the deal with this one? This one? Number 32. Owner, Mr. Prutsev. Well, tell him he's got a decent pad. If he wants to do a movie night, I'll bring the popcorn. I can't do that, I'm afraid. No? He's dead. Threw his lot in with Prigozhin.
3:40Alexey Prutsev? Of course. Was supposed to be on the Prigozhin flight that terminated in a crater next to the Volga.
3:48Luke Jasztal:Huh. You are well read, aren't you? Do you recall the ending for Slippery Prutsev? Slipped his way right out of a Russian window. Mm-hmm. Things are fucking lethal. So, what, are we having a fucking swimming race in here or something? In September 2022, the British government seized this house. You can still see a few nasty patches in the wall where we searched the place high and low for monitoring equipment. Bugs. It's been swept, checked, and put back together. Ready to go on the market. What are they looking to get for it? Cut wool mill? 19.5. Fuck me. It may go to the Liberians for a new embassy location, but right now it is owned and operated by Alma, a company of mine.
4:43Luke Jasztal:I'll get you to sign something drafted in the Cayman Islands, and just like that, you'll be the beneficiary director. Then, this place will be yours. Not in the market right now, Pilgrim. I'd need a few quid to get my hands on this place Just the one actually One pound Number 32 Belgrave Square To you Thomas H. Macduff For one British pound I don't think I'd fit in with the neighbours Then sell it I'd get in trouble for that I was the one who took it from the government I could get in trouble And you want that? Doesn't matter. Doesn't even matter. Because I won't be here for the consequences. And once your job is complete, the state will do everything in its power to bury whatever it accidentally digs up.
5:45Where are you going to be?
5:49Luke Jasztal:Ideally, scattered off the coast of Sussex. I see. You can see how this is hard to believe, right? This ain't bollocks, is it? No, Sergeant. So, this house, for me, for nothing?
6:16Luke Jasztal:I didn't say for nothing.
6:22Now, Miriam Bran, you were once a history teacher. I was. You are passionate about history. I am. Why did you quit? It's one of the hardest things I've had to do. But that's the key. I had to do it. I couldn't teach what they wanted me to teach anymore. I could no longer look children, particularly white young boys, in the eye and say, everything is your fault. Feel shame. You live an original sin. because of this culture or that culture or this incident or, you know, I refuse to radicalise British kids against their mother country. I refuse to do it. So, to put it simply, Sarah, I'm here now to make history, not teach it.
7:11And you will, I'm sure. Thank you, Miriam Brann. Thank you.
7:21Well, my opponent, I believe, is sat down with the Herald, the mainstream media, to use her terminology. She's talking about what's in the hearts of the British people. I'm not talking. I'm listening. I'm in Burton-on-Trenton. I'm listening to Gareth, the shift supervisor. I'm listening to James, the warehouse manager. I'm listening to Heather and Charlotte, the line operators, and I'm reminded by this factory in the heartland of our country that Britain, too, is a factory. Every piece has to do its job if we want the product to truly enjoy. Nobody here is sitting around talking. They're working for Britain.
8:14And so am I. Thank you. Thank you very much.
8:25This one from Frank. He's 82, Prime Minister. Every morning he cleans the streets of Newbury free of charge. He wants to know why every day on those streets does he see the Palestinian flag, the Israeli flag, the Pride flag, The Indian flag, the Ukrainian flag. Why does he see the Scottish flag, the Welsh flag? Where is the flag of Britain? Where is the flag of England and St George? When will the English get their streets back? When, Prime Minister? When will the English get their towns and villages back? When will the English get England back? The answer? I'll answer for him, Mr. Speaker. It's two weeks, that's when.
9:19Two weeks and we return England to England.
9:34You'd retire me?
9:36Luke Jasztal:That's correct. So, this is MOD? We're going to have to bypass the MOD. You say bypass? I hear override. In a sense. Sounds like a big hand from above picking me out. Would that be right?
9:53Luke Jasztal:Something like that. Who? Can't divulge that. Can't be that. That wet bag of piss. No comment. Didn't think he had it in him. Well, I think that's part of the plan's appeal. No one expects the wet bag of piss. He's not to be utilised any further. We are outside of the system. This is a private enterprise from this point. There's three phases. First phase, we get you out of the UK to a seeding nation for the task. Second phase, you get into China, ideally Beijing. Third phase, execute and exfil. The way we've planned this... I'm going to stop you now. It's better for everyone if your hands are off phase three.
10:54That's... mine.
10:56Luke Jasztal:Well, I'm rather glad you've said that. It gets a little abstract after phase one. I bet it fucking does. You okay, though? I may need to take a rest. Here, on this bench.
11:15Luke Jasztal:The contractors I researched with, they claim that men in your position already receive a multitude of offers for such training and instructor projects. Freelance gigs from other defence departments? God, aye. Tons. Not Chinese, though. No fucking chance of that. African? African, Mexican, Brazilian... Good. If I was to do it, Pilgrim, I'm not interested in having my fucking homework marked. I have to make the decisions. I don't seek clearance or alterations or permissions. I research it off the back of your Frago, right? But the final course of action is mine. There's not going to be a back and forth of fucking play-by-plays.
12:06Luke Jasztal:No chance of that. You'll be unreachable. Unreachable. Yes. You may as well be in deep space, Duffy. This must never, ever get back to this country. It would be the darkest shadow on its 1500 year history. But should it be accomplished? A new dawn for a new world. Just this single action. A moonshot. A haymaker from a middle power. Delivered in the heart of a superpower. They spoofed the plane, didn't they? One of their vessels in the North Sea. The Yantar.
13:13Yantar was most likely parked up by undersea cables, I bet. You still bring down a commercial flight, eh? That's accidental.
13:23Luke Jasztal:I'm sure. But the families of the 350 on board don't see it that way. And I don't know how our naughty boy in the Kremlin was raised, but I was always taught to apologise for my mistakes. Consequences. Consequences. So I retire from UKSF, get a freelance gig in Africa. Kenya, Ethiopia, Tanzania, Zambia, South Africa, Nigeria, Angola. China has cooperative programs and police training academies in each. Djibouti and Zimbabwe are the most entwined, but that could be too transparent. Yeah, they've got Chinese NCOs and that out there, Kenya and that. NCOs, kit, bases. You plop into the deep Along comes our catch They take the bait Hook, line and sinker Go to Beijing Get everything in place for 3rd of September 2026 A year on from BA236 Indeed I drop him And you're thinking Exfil out of a port Tianjin I assume Big fucking place That's right.
14:40What's that? 100 miles?
14:42Luke Jasztal:90 minutes from the parade on the Chang 'an Road in central Beijing. On that day, at 16.50, the Oddfiel IMO Class II chemical tanker, Bow Guardian, will let go of all lines and depart for the Bow High Strait. Next stop, Singapore. You can take your chances there, or you may be tempted by the final termination point and twerp. Belgium. Frago will be with you in due course. Who's drafting it? A NATO academic, a US arms consultant, and an insurance salesman. Insurance? They believe it to be part of a comprehensive wargaming exercise. Right. It will be difficult, Duffy. Not difficult enough. I think...
15:45I think, with all due respect, you've got to go harder.
15:52Luke Jasztal:How so? Retiring ain't good enough. Ain't fucking dirty and messy enough, you know? You want the Chinese to see me not just as another round-eye that runs drills with them, but as someone they can trust, one that's aligned, one that sees the West the way they do. Otherwise there's no fucking point in any of this. Yes, yes. You've got to fire me. Fire you for what? Some kind of dishonourable discharge, in disgrace, as publicly as possible, something that would red pill an individual into the open arms of the CCP. Yes. That would justify the PM's override of the MOD. I can recommend an angle. You can?
16:39Sexual assault. That would be immediate dismissal? In a fucking heartbeat aye.
16:45Luke Jasztal:We'll come up with something. Do your worst. You don't have any dependence do you? No. Not anymore.
17:09This NATO summit has become possibly one of the most high stakes in recent history. The member states have arrived and are currently all squeezed into this main lobby. NATO Secretary General, coming over, sir. Excellent. Mel, Depeche, can we grab you? Alex? Alex? Alex? Felix, how are you doing? Great to see you. You too. Difficult week for your beloved Bayern, my friend. It is rare, but it happens. Secretary General, you know Dipesh. Under Secretary for Defense. Hello, Dipesh. How about sing? Good to see you. And Mel Murray, of course. Of course. How are you, Mel? Very good, Felix. Look at us.
17:50We're not on screens and phones. At last. Flesh and bones. Oh, the best way to do it. I have to ask, can we do this in the room up here? Absolutely. I do not know if you heard. A lip reader says they saw me mouthing, we are fucked last week. It is not true, of course, but doing it this way... Yeah, they don't get the opportunity. Exactly. They put words in my mouth. Literal. They do it on the TV news. Very frustrating. In here. But, and you gave me fair warning about this, Mr. Kurnoway, that is politics. Yeah, that is politics. It will be a shame to leave, or a relief to leave for you. Ahem. Er, it'll...
18:37I'm... each game as it comes. Of course. Of course. Please sit.
18:45Um, where to start with this? It's... The ground moves. Absolutely. The ground moves. And, um... Yeah. Where we'll be tomorrow, a year from now. Ten years from now. Impossible to tell. Exactly. And I think in that spirit, we want to act firm now. Secretary General, this is a comprehensive report here on the actions of the Russian Federation and its sponsored clients. In what we would typically frame as Grey Zone warfare. Yes. The United Kingdom would like to establish with our NATO allies that this is beyond grey. into red. This is conventional warfare, sir. Russia are in violation of the UN Charter Article 2.4.
19:41Use of force against independent states. This we know. But against a NATO ally, the United Kingdom. The UN General Assembly Resolution 3314's definition of aggression, okay? Armed bands, groups, irregulars or mercenaries sent by a state or on behalf of... These are the movements of Russian warships in the North Sea. This, the Yantar. They claimed to be an intelligence-gathering ship. It spoofed BA-236, and all 350 people on board lost their lives. It is extremely sad. I... you know, it... There are bodies conducting their own reports into BA-236. They will come to their conclusions, as I know the British have.
20:28We are not aware of any FOI from any investigatory bodies I will, um, let me clarify my understanding of that and get back to you But, um, in short, this is cyber warfare You are asking me to take a firm stance on sand Sinking sand beneath my feet Article 3 of the Geneva Convention is a strong footing, Secretary General In 2023, UN's GGEs confirmed that international humanitarian law applies to cyberspace. Rome's statute of the International Criminal Court Article 8. War crimes can occur without formal war. Mr Choudhury, you are not the first to throw war crime accusations at the President of the Russian Federation.
21:11We're requesting that NATO do that, sir. On our behalf. We have countless examples of attacks on the United Kingdom by Russia in this document. And I'll remind you, International Court of Justice, Nicaragua v. United States, 1986. Cumulative acts can amount to an armed attack, even if individual acts do not.
Read the full transcript
21:37You wish to invoke Article 5 on Russia? An attack on one is an attack on all. And what do I say to the Americans? Hmm? 17 Russian missiles hit Polish territory last year alone. Why do we not invoke for the Poles? They would like us to. This will destroy NATO. What will destroy NATO is if you overlook 350 dead civilians. Alex! I had a meeting the other day with the statutory head of the Air Accidents Investigations Branch. They were saying that GPS spoofing, it's just time signatures. The interference just intercepts the signal and sends false times. That's it. GPS checks the time, doesn't know it's wrong, logs it, keeps plotting the route, further and further into danger.
22:35Not aware at all. And the plane goes deeper and deeper into the dark fog. Not knowing the ocean is creeping up and up. And whilst he was talking, I sort of thought to myself, That's us, isn't it? Us. Our institutions, our coalitions, we think we've got all the right data, all the right instruments, and we're on the right course. Doing the right things for the right reasons. But it's a spoof. Whole bloody thing. One look out the window and we'd correct course, but we don't. We refuse to. The data is surely perfect. The tech is surely perfect. Into the dark fog we went. And now... Swallowed to the black depths.
23:33Felix. This is a letter to the United Nations Secretary General. Signed off by me. Letter pursuant to Article 51 of the Charter of the United Nations. Article 51. Prime Minister, a member of NATO going to the United Nations to claim attack and request countermeasures would render our treaty inconsequential. Everything you and our allies fail to do in response to this action taken by the Russian Federation renders the North Atlantic Treaty inconsequential. Taken to... Why do I have to point that out? Why? Alex. Because if it wasn't me, if it was Washington, right? I am the Prime Minister of the United Kingdom.
24:30We are a member of this organization. Yes, yes, of course you are, Alex. The Poles, they can talk constantly. We're not Poland. Our casualties are not roads and railway lines. They are women and children, Felix. What I am finding all too late in my career is that these multilateral, these supranational governance bodies think that we serve them. That we are some sort of proxy to their wishes, their long-term strategies, that we're... You have to see things the way you see them, Alex. No, no, no, no, no, no, I... We, the United Kingdom, do not have a responsibility to you. We don't. You serve us, Felix.
25:07You serve us. Are you the leader of a NATO country? Alex are you in a fortnight I ask you the same question mr. Conaway
25:23Secretary-General if I may what fucking Just
25:34Okay, okay
25:54Who parked that? Did you park that? No, my valet fella did. Well, you want to sack him? Right, let's look at you then. There you go. Not got a good enough look when we were married. Hawaii? A couple of places then, Hawaii, aye? Where's the fucking tan? I didn't hear you ask that when I got back from Afghanistan. Aye, but it's fucking Hawaii, Duffy. I was working in a jungle. You've got a shite on your chin. It's Bolognese. What are you eating Bolognese it looks like that for? I'm not. Wee Charlie is. Well, he isn't eating it either.
26:33Man. There he is. Yeah. Starting to look like him. I know. That's crazy, isn't it?
26:50Strong genes your mummy's got then, eh? But sadly, pal, you bit chubby like his daddy and bald like his daddy too. Come to say anything nice about my son or my husband or... Your first husband? Now I liked him. Well, I didn't. How old's this one now? Eleven months. Eleven months? No way. Same as Finny was. Aye, same. You doing okay with that then, yeah? I'm okay, yeah. You doing the proper blankets, yeah? and no pillow or anything in the bed. Tom. Blood sugar fluctuations. You read that? Yeah, I forwarded it to you, yeah? Tom. Look, on his back, supine and flat. It's for the airways, yeah? You're all over it.
27:46Okay. Okay.
27:52Okay. Yeah. I was talking to Fi the other day because I heard James has gone into army. Oh, aye, right. She says, was Duffy ever one of the PTSD ones? I said, oh aye, but it's fuck all to do with the army. Yeah.
28:13All right. All right, aye. Just staring each other out. Aren't we, Charlie? Want to take it for a spin? See if you've still got the magic touch? Let's have a go then, shall we? Give... There. Right, Charlie boy. What does he like? Planes. What kind? Oh, the fucking Boeing 7. I don't fucking know Tommy likes planes. Language. Here comes the F-35. See, look. Covering his eyes. He knows it's a stealth fighter. You sure he's fat, lads, and not mine? Sure. I'm thrilled by the fact. F-35. No? Ah, peekaboo, is it? No, he's just covering his face because he doesn't want you shy. That was a bolognese. Here comes the plane.
29:15Peekaboo. Bullseye. There you go, I told you. Oh, man. How a good day. Finny was that, wasn't he? With the planes and the peekaboo. Do you remember? Aye, course, course. He's got his socks too, look.
29:40Aye. His socks.
29:45I thought me and Dad threw everything out. Well, you two fucking missed a spot, clearly.
29:56Finish the bowl then. Here comes the plane. Peekaboo. He's alright. I like him. Yeah? Yeah.
30:15Well, I don't really know what you are to him. What do you mean? Here comes the plane. Peekaboo. Like, is he your stepkid now? You. Honestly. What? Oh, all right, smart arse. What is he? How would he be my stepkid? I'm your ex-husband. That's not a thing, is it not? No, Claire, it's not. Here comes a plane. Peekaboo. What would he be to Finn? They... would have been half-brothers, aye? Course. Yeah, half-brothers.
30:57Do you want your post? It's been nine bloody months since he collected. Oh, aye, sure. And this is early arrival back, by the way. Why are you back early? I got a call. For what? For a thing. Here comes the plane. Peek-a-boo. So what does Fat Lat do again? Matt. All right. What does Fat Matt do? He's a kitchen fitter. He can get into all the fridges and cupboards then, can't he, smart guy? Right. Yay, thank you. That's enough. My mum wanted me to be one of them. Kitchen fitter. Aye, so did I. But you're too bloody clever for that, aren't you? With your philosophy books and politics and business, which are selling the fucking way.
31:40Here comes the plane. Peek-a-boo. We did it, pal. Teamwork. This is the letters and that. Then I just put this box together for parcels. Ah, right. Cheers. It's all right. One bowl of shite all finished. Well done, you. You're all set to have some wee ones of your own now, aren't you? You might need some women below your age group. Biological clocks and all that. IVF, weren't they? 15k. 15k? God, above. That's like... What did we pay for ours? It was like eight or nine. It's because they're adding in services that they tell you you need. Here he goes. It's called supplier-induced demand, Claire.
32:24Right? They'll package in a load of imaging and testing and... I don't need the lecture, Tom. I've got the kid. He's right there. He was worth the price tag, alright? Pressure on the boy. Christ, can you imagine if I cost Mama 15 grand? Jesus. She'd make me pay it back. With interest. Aye. None for me. I do like them, but... I'm looking at a kind of retirement plan anyway, so... 40 bloody want? I should have gone in the army. Um, Claire, there's... There might be some... Hey, hello, hello. You. Maybe some stuff that gets talked about. About me. What? You need to know it's not true, and it's part of someone else, OK?
33:19Tom... Can I get an OK, Claire? Just on that, what I've just said. Please. Okay. Aye? Aye. You alright? Oh, good. You do? I just can't have your car parked like that. You're such a perfectionist. Give me your keys. Yep. You're four o 'clock. There's 4.15. I don't have a four, Ezra.
33:54Pilgrim?
33:55Luke Jasztal:Afternoon, Prime Minister. How are we... doing? Hmm. You know, this whole house, Westminster too, White House is the same, come to think of it, has this laxative effect on me. There's a toilet through there. Same with cathedrals, big churches. I don't know what it is. Power, maybe, gives me the shit. So, you're good? Other than that? Alive, Alex. In both senses. Got you to thank for one, the zap of radiology for the other. Did you ever speak with the Pullman Clinic? No. No, no. I did advise. I know. I know. You know we can't discuss what you want to discuss, I assume. No discussions. Stum. Phase one is upon us.
35:05Good.
35:06Luke Jasztal:I understand you want to distance yourself, Prime Minister. Yeah, just... Anyway, there may be something coming. That prevents us heading into phase two. That's all I'll say on that. Not the dreaded super sanctions. The Antar has been joined by other vessels. More GPS spoofs, interference with vital subsea cables, so final roll of the dice is needed. Another final? Final, final, underscore version three? No, well, this one is more public relations and optics. Upwards isn't working. Time to try and influence downwards. We're sitting on a story that I tore into Felix Batzing at the NATO conference.
36:01Luke Jasztal:And I missed it? We feel, not just electorally, but for Britain's interests, that we may choose to not sit on it for that much longer. And when will your arse lift from this story for it to escape out into the wild? In the morning. What do you expect from that exactly, Alex? Pressure on NATO. On our allies. That we're serious. Let the world see we take a stand. And what does the world know about BA-236 exactly? Hmm? Because last time I checked, we didn't even have the balls to say it was anything other than a technical fault.
36:58I have a 415. And I just need to refresh myself on the details of it, so... Alex, our friend... Enough. He would like to meet... That's impossible for me, I'm afraid.
37:12Luke Jasztal:The country asks for you both to do impossible things. The country? Is a few days away from throwing me out. Because it believes you are weak. Are you, Prime Minister? Because our friend wants to know his task is being assigned from a place of strength, of clarity. Stop! You know this isn't alright. You know, you're a former spy, for God's sake, Pilgrim. This can't be discussed, and I cannot, absolutely cannot... I'll be with him on election night, 32 Belgrave Square.
37:56Luke Jasztal:I'll be reading all about your bravery in the face of our NATO overlords. All the best. Alex Curnoway is a nice, kind man. He's not a prime minister. He is a name, but he's not a prime minister. He is our prime minister and has been our prime minister. But with that outburst of Felix Batze, does that perhaps show just how seriously maybe he takes the security of this country? I think it shows desperation. Sorry, I don't really see anything else there. Well, can you expand on that, Miriam? When I go to Washington or go to the UN or to the Kremlin... You'd go to the Kremlin? Absolutely, I would.
38:36Absolutely, I would go to the Kremlin. So how would our allies in Ukraine feel about that? If they're that upset about it, they can return the kit. The president of Ukraine has paraded the world over for standing up for his country, right? Why can't I stand up for mine? Because we're in the West? We have to be ashamed? That's a separate argument. Cozying up to the president of Russia, people would say is not in Britain's interests. Why? Well, because the integrity of our position on the global stage is, like it or lump it, paramount to stopping Russian aggression. I can see that you're upset. But, you know, questions like this, for example, is this why you give interviews to Sarah Nichols at the Herald, for example, and not us on the eve of an election?
39:27It's impossible to get you in. Rosophobic stuff is fundamentally European mindset. And we're not Europeans then? No. No. I'm not running to be Prime Minister of Europe. Alex Curnoway is, by the way. I haven't seen him take a stance on anything unless his Euro-lib friends hold his hand first and tell him everything's going to be okay. Why do you think he's begging at NATO? Would I scream at Felix Batsing? No. Do you know why? Because I wouldn't even bother to meet with him in the first place. NATO is none of my concern. Europe is none of my concern. I am running to be Prime Minister of the United Kingdom.
40:09Luke Jasztal:Situation. Commands intent. Affect regime change in the Russian Federation using at reach deniable kinetic operations in foreign states in order to affect favourable future... Britain goes to the polls. The two old parties facing a potential crisis they haven't seen for generations. You join us live for tonight's coverage. Ground, North China. Tianjing Airport arrival. Beijing as destination. Enemy, see attached J-2 brief. Friendly forces nil. Probable missions and tasks infiltrate, assess and destroy by ambush the office of the President of the Russian Federation. Sunderland East are giving us some indication that we have our first completed count of the evening.
40:59There is a ferocious atmosphere here. You can see the red... Sunderland.
41:05Luke Jasztal:Own main effort to maintain operational secrecy and deniability of the operation. Timings, 3rd of September, 2026. H hour, 1300 local time. With 16 ,278 votes. And finally, with 21 ,431 votes. Quiet, please. Please, quiet. That is huge. That is absolutely groundbreaking in British politics. Ground orientation. Beijing and Tianjin are located in the North China Plain on the eastern side of China. Few natural elevation features until the Yanshan Mountains, which border the northern and western boundaries to the Chinese-Mongolian border.
42:05Luke Jasztal:The Southeast Sea is bordered by the Bohai Sea, leading out towards South Korea and Japan via the Yellow Sea and the East China Sea. Western mapping and navigation apps are intentionally scrambled by Chinese law. Road overlays and open source aerial photography are offset by 100 to 500 meters. This is just a bad night for Alex Kurnoway. All the Kurnoways of this world. This is the last night. This is the Kurnoway. We are seeing Kurnoway heartlands are being stripped away as the evening goes on.
42:45We're hereby to go!
42:46Luke Jasztal:Enemy forces, Russian. Strength, FSO, SPP, 80 to 150, PAX. Rossiya Special Flight Detachment, 6x flight crews, FSB, 20 to 40, PAX. It's just funny to me that Kurnoway Heartlands are having these bomb threats all day. These disruptions, the social media, classic Russian interference. I don't think it's funny, Vic, but okay. You know what I mean. I don't think bomb threats are funny. We're dealing with our democracy being tampered with. This is exhausting. This Russia stuff is physically exhausting now. Two times Aura Senate up-armoured VR10 rated Russian built limousine. Designed to withstand AP mines.
43:26Luke Jasztal:Small arms to 50 BMG and roadside IEDs to 15 kg. Two to three times SPB CPO per vehicle. Four to six times Aura's Commandant SUVs. V7 up-armoured SUVs for following CPTs. From a little under 2 ,000 for all right-wing parties combined last time out. I think Alex Burnaway's team and I think damn near every single leader in Europe is going to be here. Two to three times, IL-96-300-EU aircraft. Presidential VIP transport. Desired arrival point, Tianjin Airport 0700. And that being the path to victory for Miriam Brown. Well, put simply, Amanda, which one? There are just so many paths to victory for Miriam Brand now.
44:13Just one for Alex Kernaway, yes, in North London, but...
44:17Luke Jasztal:China. Strength. CSB 20-40 times CP officers. 150 times 8341 regiment. MPS 4-7000 times public order. 1500 times traffic control. 1000 times Snow Leopard special police units. 800 times cyber security experts. 2 ,000 times support staff. People's armed police. Surveillance equipment. Thermal drones. Anti-drone equipment. Cyber. Pistol, rifle, shotguns. Night vision. Maritime patrol boats. Inner armed security. Lions and tigers and bears. Oh my. With 29 ,763 votes, I hereby declare that Hugh Broughton is elected as Member of Parliament for Liverpool-Balton. And we are just going to cut away from those scenes in Liverpool-Balton.
45:21As we can now see, we are close to confirming an election victory. We can actually now go live to Bolton South in Bolton. It will only take one more for Miriam Brown.
45:36Luke Jasztal:You are to infiltrate by deception the area of the North China Plain. You are then to find by assess and confirm area suitable for destroy by ambush the office of the President of the Russian Federation. You will then exfiltrate by deception area in vicinity of Bohai Sea. This is in order to prevent further operations on UK interests by overthrowing the current president of the Russian Federation and enabling stabilisation of Western Europe.
46:20Command and signals nil. HQ locations nil. I think what this result does is close the... Combs methods. No.
46:32Luke Jasztal:Nice bit of bedtime reading. Aye.
46:52That's him, then. Indeed. Well, that final result and that final huge swing, we have to say, as our brilliant pundits this evening have said, that does confirm that Miriam Brand will be the new Prime Minister of the United Kingdom. Prime Minister? Hmm? There's a call. Patch it. It can't be patched a secure room, sir. Yeah. Alright. Prime Minister. This one? Yes, sir. President of Russia.
47:41Good evening. You're tired, Prime Minister. Um, long night, yes. And you? It is dark there. It is morning here. A new day. A bright dawn sun. Prime Minister, I wanted to say goodbye to you personally. Like this. Yes, well, thank you, Mr. President. Democracy can be complicated. The voters have chosen a different direction. They have, yes, they have. If you are no longer in office, it is wise to be reflective and discreet, Prime Minister. Discreet? I wish you peace in your private life. Enjoy the silence. Goodbye. Goodbye.
49:18Peek-a-boo.
49:22Luke Jasztal:Sergeant? Huh? We have a visitor.
49:29Prime Minister? Not for much longer, Sergeant. Likewise on that front. Nice house. Aye. You brought your trunks? Sadly not. I would have liked to have brought my security too, but he says hello anyway. Who you got? Robbo. Robbo, eh? Good lad is Robbo. Yeah, good guy. City fan, unfortunately, but I'm a politician. I'm used to seeing the good in people. Seeing past the bad. Unlucky about tonight, eh? Ah, well, that's how it goes. in political life for a lot of people.
50:16Luke Jasztal:How long until your call, Prime Minister? The palace are expecting it... Wow. In one hour. Christ. The big call. To the king. Wants to know who can command a majority for his majesty's government, aye? That's right. Power will be handed over... around lunchtime. And that's that then? That's that. Off to find a real job. Prime Minister, Duffy here has had a job offer of his own. Yeah. Firearms training. Lusaka. Zambian Special Forces unit. Zambia? That's right. Haven't seen a briefing in a while, but good choice from memory. Djibouti. Not an option? Too obvious. Chinese will see through that. Zimbabwe?
51:15Luke Jasztal:Zambia are the most China-indebted nation from what came forward, sir. Both infrastructure and military cooperation. They'll notice, Duffy. They'll take the bait. I have faith. Hmm. That's the limit of what I'd like to know regarding this operation. I understand. And as the rose between two perfectionist thorns, I will remind you that time has run out for you. For me. I won't be up and busying myself for much longer. For Sergeant Duffy here, he needs every minute he can get in Beijing to prepare for September next year. To dismiss him from our armed forces, we need one last act from number 10.
52:20Sure.
52:21Luke Jasztal:He will be permanently discharged for two acts of sexual assault. Jesus Christ. It had to be, Alex. The Chinese will see it. They'll think we've done a bad job of hiding it. As we have been known to do. Okay, enough. Enough. You have deniability, Prime Minister. Yes, and I'd like to keep it that way. Prime Minister, I'll go when you say go. Right? Green light, and I'm gone. I understand. But... I've got a question first. Sure, of course. Why? Why this approach? Um, well... Strategically. Again, if the UK is never held... Just a... strategic thing?
53:16No point not being honest. BA236. Right. They still doing it? Yeah. Another three vessels still doing the same thing. Spoofing. Playing with lives. 350 people for one Russian president. Seems only right. Year after year, and it's just us constantly walking backwards, constantly giving ground to them. It stops now. We don't give another inch.
53:52Well Right then I need to reply to the CO in Lusaka And then I'll And Eloise Rice Watch my brother Watch my brother tell my niece Grace She's five I watch that Him tell her that her mum wasn't coming home yes yeah that and you know I mean look they do that stuff the grey zone warfare they do that they did that to BA-236 because I'm weak sergeant those people on that flight from the six newborn babies to the ballet school from Cheltenham to the captain and his crew those Those people are dead because I am a weak person.
54:51Luke Jasztal:We wouldn't be discussing such an operation if that was so, Alex. Hey, I'm bloody... I'm proud. I'm a sore loser. I'm selfish. That's why we're discussing this, right? No point not being honest. Ah, relatable at last. There he is. Would have won on that. In the new world order, I suppose. I mean, probably aye. And what about you? Why, for me?
55:29One reason... One reason I think I'm still trying to understand, meaning or purpose, I'm not quite sure. Of course. And the other? The world needs to know. I'd rather they didn't, Sergeant. Hey, look, I know how it works. Top secret things like this, they still find a way, albeit unverifiable, into the deepest, darkest parts of the clandestine world.
55:54Luke Jasztal:Whispers. Rumours. Amongst the intelligence services, special forces, elite groups. Exactly. They need to know, and they will. A year to the date of that crash, they will know what this country is still capable of. They will know that if you fuck around with Great Britain, you will find out. And I like that, Prime Minister. I like that a lot. Hear, hear. Sergeant McDuff, I didn't want to be here tonight. For national security reasons, of course. But also, I didn't want to get my hands dirty. But big, big but. But it has taken 250 cabinet meetings, 1 ,200 security briefings, 160 PMQs for me to finally realise nothing gets done.
56:52Unless you get your hands dirty. Good luck, Sergeant. This country owes you an enormous debt. The world will be a better place on completion of your task. I promise you that. I promise. Thank you, sir. Pilgrim.
57:11Luke Jasztal:Prime Minister.
57:48We'll be right back.
58:11You
From the publisher
Sir Pilgrim Moore has found his man. Duffy is back on British soil. Prime Minister Alex Kernoway takes his case and his country's plight to NATO. All under the creeping shadow of the forthcoming election. All the momentum is with Miriam Brann.
Strong language, violence. Listener discretion is advised.
Donald Pirie as Tom "Duffy" MacDuff
Luke Jasztal as Sir Pilgrim Moore
Thomas Mitchells as Alex Kernoway
Naomi Miller as Mel Murray
Lauren Ingram as Miriam Brann
Jenny Mac as Sarah Nicholls
Magnus Rook as Felix Batzing
Nalan Burgess as Azra Simsek
Dimitry Rozental as Russian President
Naomi Miller as Clare
Amir Haider as Dipesh Choudhury
Trev Fleming as Show Voice
Additional voices
Adam Jarrell
Joel Emery
Lucy Carpenter
Dan Rhun
Pete Gold
Jasmine Kerr
Hannah Baxter-Eve
Edited by: Joel Emery
Technical Producer: David Allen
Written by: Joel Emery
Directed by: Adam Jarrell and Joel Emery
Producer: Neil Fearn
Executive Producer: Tony Pastor
Music provided by Audionetwork
Copyright 2026. Property of Goalhanger.
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