EP 81: 5 Things I Wish I Knew Sooner To Transform Over 40

0:00Shauna:Hello and welcome back to Becoming Her, fitter, better, and stronger over 40. I'm your host and coach Shauna. I'm 47, a wife, a boy, mom, and a fitness and nutrition coach helping women over 40 become their best. I spent my 20s and 30s eating less, working out harder, trying to sweat more, burn more, shrink, get smaller. And honestly, I thought that was the secret to getting fit. But what I did not realize was that approach was actually working against me. Fast forward to today. I'm 47. I train less. I eat more. and I'm fitter and leaner than I was at 27. Today I want to tell you five things I wish someone had told me sooner so you could stop working harder, start working smarter, and finally build your best body over 40.

0:42Shauna:And today I'm going to share something a little bit more personal, my story, because I think when you hear where I started from and what I went through to get here, you're probably going to see parts of yourself in it too. And I want you to know that there is a way out of that vicious dieting cycle. I am living proof and so are the hundreds of women that I've helped. Before we jump into where I am now, I want to take you back a little bit, back into my 20s. And at that time, I really wasn't into fitness or healthy eating. Honestly, it was quite the opposite. I used food as a coping mechanism. And at the time, I was dealing with depression and anxiety.

1:17Shauna:And over time, that eventually led to unwanted weight gain. And once that happened, I was desperate to lose it. And the only thing I knew to do then was to eat less and move more. So I started eating as little as possible. I started running. And of course, lo and behold, it worked. I got smaller for a little while. The scale went down, but I wasn't prioritizing protein. I wasn't building muscle. I was just shrinking. And this is something that I wish I knew and I wish a lot of us understood earlier. But when we lose weight just by restricting calories and adding in cardio, especially if we're not strength training or having enough protein, our body just doesn't lose fat.

1:55Shauna:We also lose muscle too. And muscle is what gives your body shape, definition, strength, and that toned look so many of us are chasing. And muscle also plays a huge role in metabolism. The more muscle we have, the better our body tends to partition nutrients, handle carbohydrates, support blood sugar, and maintain stronger metabolisms overall. So while I was getting smaller, my body composition wasn't improving. It was actually getting worse. I was becoming smaller but softer, not strong, sculpted, or healthy. And over time, my body adapted because the body is smart. When calories stay low for long periods of time and you're constantly trying to burn more and more, the body will learn to survive on less.

2:36Shauna:Your workouts are going to feel harder, recovery gets worse, hunger increases, energy drops, and you unconsciously move less throughout your day. And this is just called metabolic adaptation. It doesn't mean your metabolism or your body is broken, but it does mean your body just adapted to the environment it was in. Now, with that approach of eating less and running more, eventually it became unsustainable. And I rebounded and the weight came back. And I thought I had failed. But what I didn't realize is I wasn't the problem. It was the approach that was the problem. And the 90s diet culture did me no favors.

3:08Everything was about eating less, burning more, getting smaller. No one was really talking about building muscle. No one was really explaining metabolism or talking about body composition. And at the time, my then boyfriend, now husband, started to teach me a little bit about strength training and protein. I knew something had to change.

3:26Shauna:I had to take a different approach. So I started to use some dumbbells. I started with Jillian Michaels, then P90X and Insanity. And those things helped to a degree, but they were all still heavily focused around burning calories. Yeah, sure, I was holding dumbbells, but I wasn't really strength training in the way to build muscle. And I still had a lot of confusion around food and nutrition. I just thought too many calories is bad. Too many carbs are bad. And I didn't really have a clear idea of what proper nutrition looked like. Now, eventually, I got brave enough to go with my hubby, then boyfriend, to the gym.

3:59Shauna:And I did see some changes with my body. However, I still was living with this belief that I had to earn my body through sweat and restriction. Even when I would see the scale move, my body never really changed shape. I was either a bigger or smaller version of really the same thing. And I thought the harder I worked, the better my results would be. So I was in the gym six days a week, one to two hours a day, really trying to sweat my way to sculpt it. But the physique that I was working so hard for never really showed up. Flash forward to my 30s, I reached out to a coach because I was getting married and I wanted to look my best.

4:32And after hearing what I was doing for my nutrition and my training, she told me something I was not ready to hear. She said to build the body that I wanted, that tone, strong, sculpted look, I was going to have to train less with more intention and eat more and actually build my body. And it terrified me. So I went running for the hills, something I regret to this day because she was right. So I stayed kind of fit, but I was still working so hard, living on a diet and spending way too much time in the gym. Fast forward to age 39 is when I had my son and something shifted in me. I didn't just want to be smaller anymore.

5:08I wanted to be healthy. I wanted longevity. I wanted to be here for him as long as possible. As an older mom, that was my sole focus.

5:17Shauna:And that desire sent me down a completely different path of learning and research. And that's when it really started to make sense to me. And I started to understand the power of muscle and what it does for metabolism, what it does for strength, what it does for hormones. Because that toned, sculpted look so many of us are chasing comes from muscle, not from getting as small as possible. And here's the crazy part. During the years I was pregnant and nursing, which was about three to four years total, I was not dieting. I was eating enough to support my body and his. And my body responded better than it had in decades.

5:52Shauna:Because when your body is properly fueled, stress is lower, recovery improves, workouts improve, hormones are more supported, and the body feels safe enough to build and to thrive. Earlier, we talked about how your body does adapt if you are chronically eating low calories and losing muscle. But just like it can adapt down, it can also adapt up when you fuel it and train it correctly. When you spend time eating at your maintenance level of calories, building more muscle, improving your recovery, supporting your metabolism. Your body can often handle more food while maintaining fat loss or even improving your body composition.

6:27That's one reason that phasing your nutrition is so powerful. And it's why I now teach women to stop living in permanent fat loss mode. True body transformation usually happens in phases. There are phases where you're in fat loss, but there also should be phases where you're focusing on rebuilding your metabolism and your muscle. I actually did a full episode on this, breaking down the three phases of body transformation over 40, because understanding that can completely change the game for you. Have a watch if you haven't already because it will make this all connect even more. So after I started training again as a new mom, I was training less but with intention.

7:05I was training to build, building strength, building muscle, building up my metabolism, allowing time for recovery, fueling my body. And for the first time in my life, the body I had spent years working so hard to get finally started to reveal itself. Now at age 47, I train three to four days a week. I eat more than I did in my 20s and my 30s, and I look and feel so much better. And building that body required doing the opposite of what I was always told. And that's what I want for you. So if you're in that place where you are working so hard, but not seeing the body that you want,

7:39Shauna:let's dive into those five things I wish someone had told me sooner so that you can start building your best body too. Now, the first thing I wish someone had told me sooner is that you are never going to sweat your way too sculpted. I used to think if I wasn't drenched in sweat, the workout didn't count. High heart rate, constant movement, burn as many calories as possible. But sweat is not the measure of a successful workout, especially when we're talking about muscle growth. That lean, tone, sculpted look comes from muscle. And muscle is built through intentional strength training. You can sweat every single day and still never build the body that you want.

8:13I know it because I did it for years. Muscle growth happens when you challenge the muscle enough to create a reason for it to adapt.

8:21Shauna:That means lifting with enough resistance, getting close to failure, and progressively asking your body to do more over time. That is how the body, instead of training to burn, I want you to start to train to build. That means following one structured program for a set amount of weeks, 8 to 12 maybe, instead of constantly changing up your workouts. It also means using weights that challenge you, that get you close to failure within your ref ranges. And then trying to improve over time, adding another rep, improving your form, adding more weight is progressive overload. And that is one of the biggest drivers for muscle growth.

8:54Shauna:And you don't need to live in the gym. Three to four intentional strength training workouts per week is more than enough. And then on your other days, I want you to walk. I want you to move, stretch, recover. Your workouts should challenge you, but not in that chaotic, sweaty, run yourself into the ground kind of way that we were taught. This approach might have you training less, but getting much better results. Remember, we're here to work smarter, not harder. Now, the second thing I wish someone told me sooner is that you are never going to diet your way too defined. Restriction was my default for years.

9:23And I think so many of us can relate to this. You know, we probably started dieting in our 20s and honestly, we never really stopped. We just went from one to another. Smaller portions, less carbs, less calories, meal replacement shakes, fasting. But here's what no one told us. When you chronically under eat, your body just doesn't lose fat. You can lose muscle too. And after 40, muscle becomes even more important because we naturally can lose more muscle as we age. This is a big reason why women will diet and still feel soft afterward. You're losing weight without building that muscle. And without that muscle, you're not going to look defined, toned, or sculpted.

10:00Like we mentioned, your metabolism is going to adapt to that lower calorie amount. So you're going to be maintaining on lower levels of cardio. And then the other thing that will happen is that as you're losing muscle, your metabolism will slow. And it's going to adapt to those lower level of calories. So many of my clients come to me in this situation where they are eating so little, yet they're unable to lose fat. But just like your body can adapt down, it can also adapt up. And this is where strategic phasing becomes so powerful. I have some clients that are going through this process now where they were more or less maintaining their weight on anywhere from 1 ,200 to 1 ,500 calories.

10:35And all of them have gone through a reverse diet where we are slowly increasing calories, getting them into the gym, properly strength training, building more muscle. And all of them are either maintaining their weight or weighing less, have lost inches, and are feeling and looking better than they have in years. And that's because their body feels supported and we are priming their metabolism, getting it into a good place, and improving their body composition. And that's why you should not be living in a deficit forever. Fat loss is a phase. It's not a lifestyle. That defined lean look will come from giving your body and your muscles the fuel that they need.

11:09So having enough protein, enough calories, enough recovery, and enough consistency.

11:14Shauna:I now eat more than I did in my 20s and 30s, and I'm fitter and leaner. And that's what happens when you work with your metabolism versus against it. Now, the third thing I wish someone had told me sooner is that more is not always more. You know, back in my 20s, I thought the harder I pushed, the better my results would be. More workouts, more cardio, more sweat, more restriction. And that worked until it didn't. Eventually, I burned out. And after 40, this approach becomes even less effective because recovery matters a lot more to all of us now. We need to be smarter about our approach because muscle is not built during the workout.

11:50The workout is simply the signal. The growth comes afterward, during rest, during recovery, with proper sleep and proper fueling. I train three to four days a week, but then on the other days I walk, I recover, I sleep, I fuel, I rinse and repeat. My body responds better now than it ever did when I was training six days a week and running myself into the ground. More is not more. The right stimulus paired with proper recovery is what we are after, a.k.a.

12:18Shauna:working smarter and not harder. Now the fourth thing that I wish someone had told me sooner is that the plan is going to be boring, but the results are going to be exciting. for so long i thought there had to be some big secret you know some special hack that mindset kept me hopping from program to program diet to diet always chasing something new but never really building something that was sustainable today my approach is very boring my workouts don't change a lot they're not flashy there's no crazy circuits there's no jumping around there's no trying to destroy myself i lift i progress i recover i repeat that's it it's not exciting but the results are.

12:56The body I spent years chasing with trendy workouts finally came from doing the boring basics consistently. The fitness industry will love to sell you something new and shiny, but the truth is women that transform over 40 are the ones that commit to something simple and stick with it long enough to allow it to work. The body changes through repeated exposure to the right things over time. That boring plan is going to create exciting results. Now the fifth and final thing I wish someone had told me sooner is that you're never going to hate yourself into a version that you love. And I wanted to end with this because I think it's such an important point that gets overlooked.

13:32Your mindset can make or break your entire journey. You know, I spent so many years fighting my body, punishing it with restriction, running it into the ground, criticizing every part of it that wasn't perfect. And none of that got me closer to the woman that I wanted to become. The shift that changed everything wasn't just training or nutrition. It was also deciding to care for my body instead of punish it, to fuel it, to respect it, to rest it, to support it, to appreciate it. That process really started after having my son, you know, watching my body grow and bring this perfect little boy into the world made me so thankful for everything my body does.

14:09And I think sometimes we forget that, you know, your body allows you to do everything you do throughout your day. Breathe, walk, talk, hug the people that you love, experience life. And we only get one body, one vessel. You can want more for yourself while still appreciating who you are right now. And that changed everything for me. I stopped seeing my body as something I needed to fix and started to see it as something worth taking care of. So reframe your thinking, kick out that mean girl talk, start building yourself up, hold yourself accountable, but do it from a place of love and respect.

14:44Because becoming her, that strongest, healthiest, most confident version of you starts from the inside out. And the moment that you stop fighting yourself, everything can change. Thank you so much for joining me in today's episode. I genuinely hope you found it helpful. If you did, please take a minute to rate or review. It would mean the world to me. And if you have episode ideas, please DM me on Instagram. I would love to hear from you. And until next week, you know the drill. Keep getting stronger and I'll see you in the next episode.