Seann Walsh: Why I Had to Get Sober to Start My Life Again

12:07Davina McCall:Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, like you are a different person to the person you were when you were a kid.

12:13Seann Walsh:But he's sort of stayed the same. He's like, heroin stunted my emotional growth. Like it just...

12:24Davina McCall:Arrested development. Arrested development.

12:26Seann Walsh:And then at 24, I literally burst into life.

12:30Davina McCall:That's amazing.

12:32Seann Walsh:And found myself.

12:34Davina McCall:yeah I'm very happy for you because that's that's not easy that finding yourself is um is huge and it kind of sounds you know it could sound cliched but it's you know I know it's not and you know it's not that you know for 16 to 24 if you talk you know legally you're an adult at 18 24 six years six years you've not you've not spent a day with the real Davina in those in those six years you know so it's it's very huge is your dad still using uh no no no i mean years ago i did a show about this this is why i had to ask him permission to talk about it because i did i wasn't going to do it if i didn't have him say yes and he said shall i couldn't give a shit talk about it if you want i couldn't care less um so i so i did and he and he had stopped at that point and he it was in the show I did this show and it touched on on mine and my dad's relationship and I this is true I met him to what is it now I met him to I met him to almost like a journalist really I met him to ask him some questions that that would maybe help my story in the show what you know just his story, his story with the drug.

14:04Davina McCall:And it was there that I discovered that he hadn't taken it in a couple of years.

14:11Seann Walsh:But that's mad that you didn't know that.

14:13Davina McCall:No, we weren't really communicating at that point.

14:17Seann Walsh:So this brought you back together?

14:19Davina McCall:Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It did, yeah. I mean, we're still quite distant, me and my dad, but we do talk. He texts me after the QPR game, but we're just not that kind of family. We're not, you know, we never had... And I think this goes with something, we never had a table at home. You know, the thing of... One of the things... LAUGHTER

14:44Seann Walsh:You know, can I just say something? That is so... That tells me so much. Right, right. Like, a table is a basic family need. Right. What are you going to sit round to play Uno?

15:00Davina McCall:Exactly. All right. And do you know what? One of my first girlfriends, I remember having dinner around their house and we had to sit around the table and it was this mortifying thing. What, I've got to look at you? Yeah, we've got to sit around the table with your parents. We're going to sit around. Why the parents? I don't want to sit with your parents. It was so scary because I wasn't used to this. and the reason they did it and she used to hate it um she was wonderful she used to hate it and and i i remember i used to say to her no this is this is so important because her dad would ask everyone she had a brother and ask everyone how their day had been and at first at first i found it mortifying i hated the concept and then i grew to love it and obviously that's what we do at home Obviously, we have the table.

15:53Davina McCall:The kids now, me and Grace with the kids, we have it around the table. It's so important, the table, to family.

16:02Seann Walsh:I think there's a book in that. You know, the table.

16:06Davina McCall:Yeah, yeah, yeah. When I talk about teenagers, my girlfriend told me to never say no to a teenager.

16:15Seann Walsh:And I was like, I don't get that. Like, what? That's impossible. How can you not say no to a teenager? She said, they're teenagers. They're coming into adulthood. Yeah. They need a negotiation. And you take them to the negotiating table. That's fantastic. And you sit down and you go, okay, tell me what you want. Okay, the reason why I'm having a problem with that is because of this. I've got to get up really early in the morning. I don't want to come and pick you up at three o 'clock in the morning.

16:40Davina McCall:Yeah.

16:40Seann Walsh:Can we negotiate on the time? You know what I mean? Yeah, that's fantastic. I'm having that. They negotiate a bit. I negotiate a bit.

16:46Davina McCall:They feel heard.

16:47Seann Walsh:I feel heard. No argument. No leaving the room and going, I hate you. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

16:53Davina McCall:I've got that to come, but I'm using that.

16:55Seann Walsh:That's why you've got a table now as well.

16:57Davina McCall:Yeah, absolutely.

16:57Seann Walsh:For later, negotiating.

16:59Davina McCall:Exactly, yeah. So, like, how do you create a safe environment for you

17:06Seann Walsh:in relationships when you're growing up? Like, that's really hard.

17:10Davina McCall:Well, I think, you know, no boundaries is something that... I've kind of had to... I mean, we'll get to that, I'm sure, but not drinking was so important in creating boundaries and pathways of existing.

17:34Seann Walsh:When did you stop drinking?

17:36Davina McCall:I stopped drinking, but we're 2026. I stopped drinking 2020. 2020. 2020. In 2019, I made the decision to stop. And I did well, but I had a few blowouts. And I only ever did blowouts. Every time I drank, it was a blowout. You know, it was nuclear. So I had a few blowouts that in 2019. And then after that, I managed to not have a drop since.

18:09Seann Walsh:And how's that been?

18:11Davina McCall:It's what surprises me that this is the thing what surprises me is not wanting to do that at all. That that's what you can never imagine. You can imagine not drinking because you've got you've kind of made this choice that you've got to not drink but you can't ever imagine that one day you won't want to.

18:35Seann Walsh:Yes even if somebody said you could magically drink again and not have a problem with it, you don't want to. No, not at all. Yeah, I feel the same.

18:42Davina McCall:You're absolutely right. When you said that, I was like, well, hang on a second, but you're right. You are right. I think there's a great freedom in not wanting to do that or not needing to do that. And what took a while, what you've realised, and you don't drink, do you? No. So I think you'll know this, but you might have your own, you might have your own experience of this is you think the reason you're drinking is because you want to be drunk but actually the reason you're drinking is because you don't want to be sober that is big that's a big thing to realise now when you're sober you've got I drank from 17 to 33 33, 34 Or, you know, that means no adulthood.

19:42Davina McCall:You've gone from child, teenager, and then just not grown up at all. So at 33, wake up. Who the hell are you? I had absolutely no idea. What were my interests? Yes, okay. But you know what I mean? What are you going to do? Because you used to wake up, and I was never someone. I was never someone that woke up and had a drink. I was never that person. But what I was is I was someone that woke up and thought, I can't wait to have a drink. I can't wait the tonight to get on it. Yeah, absolutely. That was your day. That was your motive in life is whatever you're going to do, you know, after that, after that, after that, we'll get shit-faced.

20:23Davina McCall:Brilliant. Get on it. Well, that's gone. Now what is there to look forward to? That takes some recalibrating, you know. And once that is a gradual process, but once you start to see the benefits of not drinking, feel the benefits of not drinking, you realise how powerful it is.

20:50Seann Walsh:What were they? What could you see and what could you feel?

20:52Davina McCall:I think that, okay, so I try to think of how to kind of manage this in my own mind, but I think there's a story here of, I wanted to be a comedian from, I used to do stand up in the playground as a 10 year old boy at primary school. This was in London before we moved. And my mum would show me Chaplin and Laurel and Hardy. They were on in the mornings.

21:32Davina McCall:And sometimes, because there was no bedtime, I would be up when Whose Line Is It Anyway was on. I remember watching that in South East London. My parents would be up talking, and I would be watching Whose Line Is It Anyway. these people these adults it was so crucial to me I think that they were adults because I saw kind of adults as these disciplinary and

21:58Seann Walsh:yeah

21:58Davina McCall:you know things they were there to tell you off and they were there to say no and and then there were these adults that I'm watching on TV chapter Lauren Hardy the cast of of Whose Line Is It Anyway and they're adults and they're being funny and they're being childish. They're being very physical and very silly. And I think as a child, that blew my mind. It opened up a universe for me. And even as a child, I would think about comedy. It was totally bizarre. I would think of sketches.

22:36Seann Walsh:Do you know, the other thing I was thinking about, though, was that if you weren't getting noticed a lot at home, you were just kind of left to your own devices. there's something about you learning a skill to get you noticed so at school you're going I'm here nobody sees me outside of this place you're gonna see me because I'm funny

22:55Davina McCall:do you know what I mean yeah absolutely and you know therapists have said the same but I think of course that's I think there is a truth in that of course but on a conscious level as opposed to an unconscious level i just it just made me so happy and we and you know you could break you could break that down and we can look as into the whys but actually on the surface of things which is still important it just brought me so much joy it just brought me so much joy comedy i mean laughing it's just this it's this magical thing are you having a better time are you having a better time than when you're laughing it's it's just so wonderful and so as a child there was this thing i wanted to do i didn't really know about stand-up as such but i wanted to be this a comedy actor i wanted to be a comedian in some sense and once i once i became one something went wrong and drink in my early 20s my mid-twenties, Bose really started to kind of win.

24:08Seann Walsh:Can I ask you something about that?

24:10Davina McCall:Yeah, of course. So is it that like you had this dream

24:14Seann Walsh:and I want to do it and I want to do it and then you got there and it didn't quite fix the thing that you thought or the itch, it didn't itch the scratch that you had? Absolutely.

24:28Davina McCall:I think the problem, I think, and again, it's taken me way, I feel like it's taken me way too long to learn this. is that when what was happening in my stand-up career didn't match what I had kind of envisioned, that really threw me off. That really threw me off. I didn't understand how...

24:55Seann Walsh:Oh, so you wanted to do better, but was that because you were drinking? Was your drinking holding you back in terms of...

25:05Davina McCall:I was in a strange position You did a lot Early on I was in all the finals of the competitions I won some of the competitions I You know I was I did not listen to these things But you're told You're going to be an arena comic You're going to be this, you're going to be that When that doesn't It's not when that You know, as a 40-year-old man now, I...

25:37Seann Walsh:Yeah, but you were different then.

25:39Davina McCall:Yeah, but I kind of... What did I think? I was going to be an arena comic when I was 26. You know, I look back now and I think... I felt like I'd failed way too soon. I was 24, probably, right? Doing Live at the Apollo. Wow. Well, I think I was, yeah, I did, I'd done two live at the Apollos. I'm doing live at the Apollo and thinking I failed. If you look at, if you look at, it's an, it's, I was going to say it's interesting, might not be interesting for anyone. But the first live at the Apollo I do, I wear a purple suit and I look a much better nick. I've got my long hair, my highlights. And it's a very energetic set.

26:31Davina McCall:and I'm there to, this is my moment. And it went down wonderfully on the night. If you look at the second Live at the Apollo, I'm bloated, my hair is like, it's too long. I've just kind of let go. And I've got a big beard and I look, I don't, I see it sometimes, you know, on the internet, someone's used a picture of you on a poster or whatever. And I could just see it's like, there's a young man on Live at the Apollo that thinks he's a failure. You're on Live at the Apollo. I just want to go back and shake him. Why did you feel a failure?

27:04Seann Walsh:Or hug him.

27:05Davina McCall:Or hunk him. Well, absolutely. Yes, you're right. Absolutely. And so that feeling of failing, I just didn't want to be me. And I just wanted to escape via booze. And so to come back, to come back to what you said a while back, which is, what have you discovered? I said this to someone recently, and I think I said it might sound strange, but not drinking connected me with the 10-year-old me that was doing stand-up in the playground again. And that was so crucial.

27:51Seann Walsh:How amazing is that?

27:52Davina McCall:I was doing... That's amazing. Yeah, when we came out of lockdown, you know, and audiences were sparse, I was doing, I still had a tour booked in for some reason or something. I was doing tour shows to very, very few people. Very few people.

28:10Seann Walsh:What was that like?

28:12Davina McCall:But, well, here's the thing. This is the strange thing. By that point, because I'd had lockdown was... You know, it was a huge time for everyone in the world. But for me, the world paused. I needed that. I needed that break. I needed time away from the world to kind of heal. Yeah. And so when I go to tour and those audiences are sparse, this is crazy. I didn't take it for granted that those I think I was doing I remember doing the whole truck theatre and I don't know there must have been honestly if 30 people in a you know a decent sized theatre there wasn't one bit of me that was fazed by that I was so happy that those you know 30 people had chosen to see me and I thought I'm going to give them the best time.

29:20Davina McCall:I don't care. I don't care. I'm so lucky to be doing this.

29:23Seann Walsh:Isn't that amazing when you think about you just telling me about second Apollo? I know. Isn't it mad? And you're looking at this guy at the Apollo Theatre feeling like a failure.

29:36Davina McCall:Total failure.

29:37Seann Walsh:And then how many years later was that? 10?

29:41Davina McCall:12 years later?

29:42Seann Walsh:You are playing to 30 people. So, so full of gratitude.

29:47Davina McCall:Yes. Yes, exactly, a lot of gratitude.

29:50Seann Walsh:How beautiful.

29:51Davina McCall:Yes.

29:52Seann Walsh:But you know this show is called Begin Again.

29:54Davina McCall:Yes.

29:55Seann Walsh:And there are so many ways that you've done that. No, but it's a beautiful thing because there are going to be people watching who have felt like you. We all have failures.

30:08Davina McCall:Yes.

30:08Seann Walsh:I'm done. I'm 25. I'm 30. It's over. My life is over. But it's not. and you can pick yourself up and you can start from scratch and be so full of gratitude because it's the thing you love.

30:25Davina McCall:Absolutely.

30:26Seann Walsh:It's beautiful.

30:27Davina McCall:Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's very powerful and I think it's, importantly, it's positive. And I know that's a simple word to use in this instance, but just being positive and, of course, being positive attracts positivity. Of course it does. just like negativity attracts negativity. You know, it's... I don't play to those numbers anymore. And I don't think that that's... I don't think, again, that's... If I'd got into those rooms, I'd seen that there was only 20-something people in a theatre and I'd gone out. And I would have been... I think you'd be in your rights to be deflated about that. Yeah. And just try to get through it and end it so that you can get out of there and try and put that behind you, that is not going to lend itself to increasing those numbers.

31:25Davina McCall:Yeah. To increasing the feeling good about yourself. The better you feel about yourself, the more you're going to attract. So I think that was, yeah, I think that's very, very crucial.

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34:45Seann Walsh:I would like to talk about Strictlygate because my feeling is that we are good people and you're a good man that made a mistake but it hurt people. You know you had you had some personal stuff going on that you were trying to deal with and you were doing that in the public eyes so what talk to me about where you are because you were hot you were hot comedian like happening strictly wow like listen

35:25Davina McCall:very very very difficult for me probably anyone to be able to try and kind of condense that but well I've said this before one of the things that become so surreal is the the seeming the seeming kind of enjoyment and pleasure that people took from your life being kind of pulled apart was so

36:08Davina McCall:I think that... Sorry.

36:12Seann Walsh:I completely understand what you're saying. It's horrible talking about it, right? Because you're remembering what it felt like.

36:21Davina McCall:Yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely.

36:24Seann Walsh:And, you know, obviously I know there are other people involved, so I don't want to dig into it too much.

36:28Davina McCall:Absolutely, yeah, yeah, yeah.

36:29Seann Walsh:I don't want to hurt their feelings. Yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely. And I want to respect them as well. So let's not do that. But what I want to talk about, because people get cancelled all the time. Yeah, I know. This is modern life. Yeah.

36:45Davina McCall:And I think it was before the term cancelled had been coined.

36:52Seann Walsh:Yeah. But it's that feeling of everything disappearing overnight. Yes, precisely that.

37:01Davina McCall:about what that what how that manifested it's something i live with uh you can't really go back to where you were before that happened in your life no that has happened right and you're gonna live for the rest of your life with that having happened you can't delete what's happened so you're gonna have to go forward not back and you're gonna have to go forward in a different direction to where you were going. And I think that took me many, many years to work out. But as soon as I learned that, it made it easier that you've got to live with this. You can't delete this. Unfortunately or fortunately, it's part of you.

37:52Davina McCall:And now let's move forward.

37:55Seann Walsh:Can I just say, I think that's actually a brilliant piece of advice for anyone that's come across some major problems in their life

38:04Davina McCall:Yeah, difficulty in their life, absolutely

38:05Seann Walsh:I will never be the same person again

38:08Davina McCall:Absolutely not, yeah

38:09Seann Walsh:That's kind of an amazingly liberating feeling It is I've just got to become a new person with the thing that I did Totally Wow

38:17Davina McCall:Totally Yeah, I really mean that

38:22Seann Walsh:Yeah what's nice is we were talking about this turnaround in in lockdown and how yeah kind of life began yeah you needed that space to heal to lick your wounds yeah to reset and to rebuild your life and to think about who you were you know you said what do i want i've got all this space now in my life like what do i what do i need what do i who am i kind of just like a reset but grace grace Grace comes along and you meet her at that time as well. Yeah. So how did you meet Grace? We met.

39:02Davina McCall:We actually, I was going down the escalators in Marble Arch tube station. Yeah. And she was going up the escalators. Shut the front door. And so we had to part meet cute at that point. and then a couple of days later, so she did, the kind of romantic story is slightly marred by the fact that she knew who I was because a couple of days later, I saw a follow on, this is how people meet now. I saw a follow on Instagram and it was, I was like, that's the girl.

39:36Seann Walsh:Oh my God, you remembered her. From the escalators. Oh my God, escalator girl. Escalator girl. This is amazing.

39:44Davina McCall:Yeah, yeah, yeah. so uh so then of course then i well i slid into the the dms are can i just ask something are you the girl from the escalators and then there you go but what i did let me oh my god that is amazing well you're you're like you're like you might like this you might not well so for proposal to propose yeah what what we did is i was there was a stretch i was very very busy last year and i said what i had pitched was that little did she know the truth but what i pitched was uh like i'm so busy you know i can't go find ring because i like we've got to i've got to We would have to go on holiday.

40:34Davina McCall:I'm not proposing just anywhere.

40:36Seann Walsh:In London, like, uh, in Shepherd's Bush.

40:39Davina McCall:Exactly. So what are we going to, you know, let's, okay, tell me what we'll do. We'll book up, let's have just an engagement day where we go and get your ring. So you decide on the ring. We'll do an engagement day. So she kind of acquiesces with this, I imagine. She's not particularly, I don't think this is the ideal, this is not the most romantic way of doing it. But what I then did is I, the ring that she chose that she thought she wanted, I then contacted the person that made that ring. And I got the ring without Grace knowing. And then on the engagement day, what we did is, she's awful with transport.

41:22Davina McCall:She's like, no idea. Wait, what do you mean? She's just no idea what still. No idea what line is which, where it goes. That's so cute. Eastbound, westbound. Like, just absolutely no idea. Okay.

41:37Seann Walsh:Do you know what I mean? It is quite cute, isn't it? Like, oh.

41:40Davina McCall:It could be cute. It could be unbearable on days. But, so what it is, I know she'll have no idea that if I, say we drive into town. This is how little she knows. We drive into town. We're driving to look at the ring. Quote, unquote. And I say, well, do you know what? There's no way we're going to get through London now. We're best to just park up and get on the tube. Which is just like, if you just looked around through the window, you would see it's absolutely fine. You're lying. He's lying. But I knew she would just go, oh, right, okay. So I park up. We go into Marble Arch tube station and we're going down the escalators, right?

42:25Davina McCall:We're going down the escalators. We're going down the escalators. And then we get to the bottom. And I go, typical, the Elizabeth line's not running. There is no Elizabeth line on the Marble Arch tube station, but I know she'll have no idea. And she goes, oh, right, we're going to have to go back up to get the central line. Central line's not upstairs, it's downstairs. So we're going up the escalators. When we get halfway through, I run up. and run down with the ring, open the ring, as we're sliding down... I'm not sliding, going down the escalators. So she sees the ring in the box there. There you go.

43:08Seann Walsh:That's amazing.

43:10Davina McCall:Yeah, one detail I left out is I hadn't thought about what happens after that point.

43:16Seann Walsh:And you're both at those different ends.

43:18Davina McCall:Yeah. So she comes down and I go up. That was again. Completely messed it up. Then got down on one knee at the top of the second escalator and an American guy just walked past and went, congratulations. That's it.

43:33Seann Walsh:Oh, that is so lovely. Oh, my God. That was last year.

43:40Davina McCall:That was last year, the summer.

43:42Seann Walsh:Absolutely mega.

43:43Davina McCall:Yeah.

43:44Seann Walsh:Congratulations.

43:45Davina McCall:Bless you. Thank you. So, Grace. Grace.

43:52Seann Walsh:What happened? Like, when you met and you started DMing each other, like, what was it about Grace?

44:01Davina McCall:We just had such a good time. We had such a fun time together. When we met up, we had such a laugh and we felt so... I think we felt so comfortable. Easy. so so easy well that's helping yourself right it's no and do you know what yeah do you know what i'll tell you something here that yeah it's you know it's a i think it's a big thing to kind of say to open up about is that i remember i don't know if it's early doors but i over whatever reason and I hope this is an okay thing to share but whatever reason I slapped, not like at her about something but I just slapped, whatever, don't know what it was, it would have been a very small thing and I slapped and Grace went do you think that was an acceptable way to go and I had never I'd never had that before because I come from You know, the household that we came from was shouting.

45:18Seann Walsh:Yeah, it was chaos.

45:19Davina McCall:It was chaos and we shouted. That's how we communicated.

45:22Seann Walsh:And when she said that, she said it quietly.

45:24Davina McCall:Very.

45:25Seann Walsh:Yeah. Amazing, right? The power of that.

45:27Davina McCall:Yeah, the power of that. The fact that I had to answer it. Well, the fact that I had to go, no. Oh, yeah.

45:40Seann Walsh:You can take that from someone you love.

45:42Davina McCall:Yeah, yeah, absolutely. and Grace just knows how to just know yeah she's the best she knows you she knows me but she it's not she knows it's understands I think we understand each other we have we have a great time we're in the process right now we've got the three year old and an 11 month old now yeah oh my god amazing we don't get that much time to like uh we don't get our own time which we are both aware is very important and we're trying to figure out how to do that more but last last night we got some time and it was so wonderful it was wilder's birth my daughter my

46:32Seann Walsh:oldest daughter's birthday great names by the way wilder and casker like unbelievably good names Bravo

46:39Davina McCall:The Wilder had a birthday party And we just stayed up last night Just talking about Wilder And It was just It was just absolutely It was like me in heaven Just talking about Your You know The things you love the most With the person you love the most It's absolutely But yeah There's nothing like it I've said about childhood actually About sorry about parenthood is is that it's like it's like trying to when i've got when i've got friends that haven't got kids it's like trying to like explain an undiscovered color you know like that's so great there's a color well what's it look like well it's a color it's a new color yeah i can't yeah i can't that's what it feels like to me i mean having had the the childhood that you had

47:35Seann Walsh:Like, were you nervous about having kids? Because I was. What happens if I can't do it because I didn't have a mum to show me how to do it?

47:44Davina McCall:Do you know what? Grace, we were a florist. In West London, we were a florist. And the woman who I think owns the florist, her child was in. Grace works with kids. And her child was in. And Grace taught her child. and grace is so so so wonderful with children and i thought that day oh god i hope she's the the mother of my children and it was the next night that she told me she was pregnant so very very very very nice neat coincidence um i'm very very lucky my wilders and casper's grandparents or you know that Grace's parents are the just most wonderful wonderful wonderful people and they don't table I mean you table isn't it nice now we know we just have to say the word table exactly and I know what you mean yeah yeah yeah but they they're it's the opposite it really is the opposite of of uh just even the the look of the look of the houses ever everything they're so solid and stable.

49:02Davina McCall:And so I have to say I didn't have what you had. I had obviously natural nerves.

49:14Seann Walsh:But you felt prepared and like Grace and you as a team kind of have got this together.

49:22Davina McCall:Yeah, I think that, I think, you know, life has given me enough and put enough, you know, chucked enough at me. I've checked enough of myself for me to have learnt, I think, a lot to be able to help my children not have the chaos and the kind of anarchy that I had. very early doors they're still young but I feel I've seen and experienced enough to be able to have some dare I say it about myself but have some wisdom Are you protective of them?

50:10Seann Walsh:More so than

50:12Davina McCall:My family friend Michelle who I love dearly Michelle was making a roll up in the living room the other day I'm the same as mine Michelle she's not allowed to see that, get rid of that she's not even smoking it of course not indoors but she would yeah, it's like Michelle Lowe I don't want to hope you're seeing someone make a run up so I hope I don't go to the other way but I'm very conscious I'll tell you why, I'll tell you something that occurred to me is my my dad's my dad, he kind of had one mantra that he left me certainly me with, when it was late at night me and my dad would walk to the petrol station very late at night so he could pick up money to score or to get some tobacco.

51:01Davina McCall:And the thing he left with is he'd say, Sean, do what you want to do. Always do what you want to do in this life. He hated his job and he didn't want me to hate mine. So as much as there were no, what was the word you used earlier? Boundaries. As much as there weren't any boundaries, what actually came with that, the caveat to all of the bad stuff wasn't there well there was a freedom in in not being kind of restricted and and what and going for what you want out of life so even as a child you could if you wanted to be a comedian

51:38Seann Walsh:or do it an act you could you could do it well that's such a gift there isn't it so it is it's

51:45Davina McCall:a strange it's a thing you got to weigh up philosophically it's a bit it's a big with my

51:50Seann Walsh:mum yeah um you know it was carnage but I am half my mum like absolutely she is in in me yes and I'm grateful for some of the funny things that she's gifted me I'm my half wild child is her yeah and I'm glad I'm half yeah like I like dancing till late and I like I'm 58 and I'm gonna grow old really disgracefully. Like, I'm really looking forward to that.

52:18Davina McCall:Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

52:19Seann Walsh:And that's her. Yeah. I'm grateful.

52:22Davina McCall:Yes.

52:22Seann Walsh:It was fucking tough. Right. And I think your dad has given you some good things, you know. Oh, absolutely. And made you who you are. And you're on such a journey of self-discovery, I feel.

52:37Davina McCall:Yes. But he, you know, he said, do what you want. He took us to QPR.

52:45Seann Walsh:Yeah.

52:46Davina McCall:So if you look at that, I live by QPR. You're going to take your kids, right? And I do what I want. Oh, absolutely. Gotcha. I do what I want and I live by QPR. The other thing that he said, which I ignored, the only other kind of thing to his QPR, do what you want and read. He was obsessed with trying to get me to read. And I think it was this, I loved films. And read, I couldn't get my head. I was in all the bottom sets at school. I have no GTSEs. I won in drama. But, you know, I was a naughty kid. Books I just couldn't get. I could barely read.

53:28Seann Walsh:Do you read now?

53:29Davina McCall:And now I read. Isn't that amazing? I've got the dictionary app. And every word I don't know is in the dictionary app. I try and learn it. Right, that's in there. so I am very very very very aware of you know what you can get as a child what you can get from your parents because there's a lot of chaos there but there's only a few things that my dad actually

53:58Seann Walsh:yeah as I say QPR and your kids will remember everything exactly so you you know you can plant

54:05Davina McCall:these healthy seeds into their life. We'll see. We'll see. But I'm very aware of those seeds that you plant growing and what they can do because I didn't get many. But with the ones I did, I followed them.

54:23Seann Walsh:I'd like to talk to you about being 40. I'm going to round up with being 40. The last 10 years have been big for you. They've been seismic. you know uh you've you've shape-shifted in quite a massive way like you've been through a lot like what does 40 to 50 look like where do you want to be at 50

54:50Davina McCall:well do you know what career aside for a second comedy aside that you know that thing i love doing aside as a parent you're you're very lucky because you've been given this thing you know children that you get to watch grow and really it is a miracle isn't it that's what yeah and that's what that's what yeah that's what you're looking forward to the most is them growing up and how

55:21Seann Walsh:much you learn from them and everything it's like it's just they tip my children have taught me so much about myself oh that's one and patience and um i i mean now my children keep me so grounded because my kids just take the piss out of me relentlessly yeah and i kind of love it it's so

55:42Davina McCall:funny i i wilder i think she unfortunately gets this from me but wilder would be you know she would kind of almost immediately panic you know if she can't if she's getting you know she get a t-shirt on and they can't get the arms through you know the start help and i've you know over the last year or so it's wilder if we can't do it what do we do we do it slowly slowly and i should do it oh that's great though right so always that's very look at you yeah who are you I know. And then the other day I couldn't, I couldn't find, I'm panicking and I'm trying to find a spoon. I couldn't find the spoon.

56:25Davina McCall:I'm going, no clean spoons. Where the spoon? And then I said, well, Daddy,

56:31Seann Walsh:slowly. But it's happening already.

56:36Davina McCall:That's it. She's barely three. She's not even three. What am I talking about? She's still two. I've got a two-year-old telling me to calm down.

56:45Seann Walsh:But isn't that perfect? Yeah. I mean, a bit like I was saying about Grace being able to talk to you honestly. Your kids are the ones that can talk to you honestly and say something to you and you will never be angry with them because they are telling you the truth in a kind way. It is absolutely amazing.

57:07Davina McCall:Yeah.

57:08Seann Walsh:You know, your future, the next 10 years are going to be amazing.

57:14Davina McCall:Yes, it's wonderful. We're very blessed.

57:17Seann Walsh:I've got one thing to finish with.

57:19Davina McCall:Go. How long have we been talking?

57:22Seann Walsh:No, like nearly two hours.

57:25Davina McCall:Oh, my good Lord. This is a letter for you from Grace. Oh, God.

57:31Seann Walsh:And we were just wondering if you would read it out to us. Oh, God.

57:36Davina McCall:Okay. Oh, no. Oh, God. I feel sick. Is this on every show?

57:46Seann Walsh:We do try and get something for everybody.

57:48Davina McCall:Not from Grace. Not from Grace. Grace is on every show. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, no. What I admire most about Sean, which I have told him before, is his unwavering dedication to his work slash dream. Despite life's challenges, he's never given up. He continues to write and create, and his shows just keep getting better with each passing year. I'm just so proud of what he does and has achieved especially how he inspires our daughter and will eventually inspire our son while he certainly had a profound impact on me I'd say the most tangible change is that he's turned me into a coffee connoisseur to quote Sean I showed you tell me I'm always telling her when we met she was on she was on the instant coffee and so i i've showed her like the world of like the long black

58:55Davina McCall:you've changed her life i've changed her life i really have for the better coffee is important um we're like the ultimate odd couple yeah but i love that we do our own thing and then come together to just be we take long walks around west london drink coffee and just talk about whatever is going on that week obviously nine out of ten that's something wilder has done parenting's been a wild ride but i couldn't be happier that i get to do it with sean he is so loving so generous so playful and so affectionate with them both i'm grateful for sean's understanding and support of our co-sleeping decision

59:36Seann Walsh:that is a big deal

59:38Davina McCall:was that a decision or was that no yeah I've been with Wilder and Grace is in with

59:46Seann Walsh:you know who Catherine Ryan is a big co-sleeping advocate

59:51Davina McCall:oh really

59:52Seann Walsh:I think it's amazing and it makes them feel very safe do you know what this is good

1:00:00Davina McCall:Wilder the other night she woke up i went in cuddled her to sleep i then i don't know why i did this i think it's because i wanted to watch tv in bed so i went into our main bed in the bedroom and in the morning wilder said daddy you weren't there to look after me right i am never ever getting out that bed ever again ever i'm in there till she's 30 i don't care i do not care a husband to be like it's gotta be time that your dad gets out of the bed i'm not going anywhere sorry mate but you know

1:00:47Seann Walsh:my dad was like my dad like like that like i'd want to sit on his knee and give him cuddles like

1:00:51Davina McCall:until he died like i was yeah you know it just i bet uh never stops no anyway go on go on a bit

1:00:59Seann Walsh:There's more, there's more, sorry.

1:01:00Davina McCall:He never pressures me to get the kids to sleep on their own and instead prioritises their needs. It's truly amazing and it makes me love him even more. Having a partner like Sean makes navigating parenthood feel more manageable. But after saying all of this, I'd also like to ask him publicly... What does it say? To stop leaving banana skins on the side.

1:01:29Davina McCall:Do you? Hey, maybe. I might have an issue.

1:01:37Seann Walsh:She's funny.

1:01:38Davina McCall:She is funny. Yes, she's very funny. And I might have issues putting banana skins in the bin. Sean? Thanks. Oh, absolute pleasure.

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