Rachel McCord: The Heart-Stopping Moment That Changed Her Forever

0:03The fact that your heart is beating is evidence that you have a huge purpose in this life. So don't undercut yourself because maybe you've been weighed down with heavy laundry and a messy house and a lot of cooking and all of the obligations as a mom in business trying to make your way but also maybe feeling insecure putting yourself out there. Like you have to remember a your purpose be you have to remember that you got to push through so It's almost like if you've been on a merry-go-round for 30 years of your life and you finally get off the merry-go-round You're gonna be dizzy, but that's okay Get comfortable in that because in that transformation you truly change and the third is you've got to think about the people in your corner What you think about you truly bring about you speak life or death So if you become aware of your thoughts You can become aware of the people around you and what their words are and how you're edifying one another

1:08Welcome back to the BILFOD where authenticity trumps authority. We are live on set at the Gottfried and I am so excited today because our next guest is also an amazing bilf. She is, well, I'll let you, I'm going to let you talk about who you are and what you do. But first, do you know what a bilf is? Okay. So I got to be honest. When I first heard that I was going to be on bilf, I was like, Oh, okay. And I told my husband and I just, I saw it in a text, you know? And so, so my husband was like, is it a guy interviewing you? And I was like, no. He's like, okay, that makes me feel better. Then I was like, Oh, it's a boss.

1:44I'd like to Follow, follow, follow. Yes, follow. I'm dead. Oh my God, that's so funny. That was a whole husband-wife conversation. That is so funny. So you might have thought this was an inappropriate podcast. Well, I said yes to it because my friend asked me. And then I was like, oh, that's unique, you know? But I'm here for it. And then later when I knew what it was, I was like, oh, she's smart. Because that's a real stop yourself. I'm sorry, you said what? It's really good. A boss I'd like to follow. That's what it is. We're here with Rachel McCord, who is an author, TV personality, mom. I mean, you've had so many accolades.

2:21You are a heart surgery survivor, which is something I really want to talk about. I don't want to get too deep, but I mean, just that in itself. And we'll touch on that. But an entrepreneur, I mean, is there anything that you don't, I mean, you are a true bilf. I don't sleep enough, apparently. No, every time I hear like all the hyphens, I'm like, I need more sleep. But no, I feel like I'm finding balance now. But you said we're not going to go too deep, so I'm going to have to keep myself back. No, we can't go deep. I'm the girl who's like, oh, we're going to go snorkeling. I'm like all the way in the bottom.

2:50No, no, let's go deep. And I just, you never know. Listen, I don't want to go deep. Yeah, you're like, I don't know how much depth this blonde girl in L.A. has. No, never. No, but you know, I will, let's, I don't, well, one thing I didn't tell you, I know we like talked it up real quick. So my dad actually died of a heart attack. No way. Yeah, at 38 years old when we were on vacation. On vacation with your family? Yeah, when I was six years old. Isn't that crazy? Six years old, yeah. Oh man, I'm so sorry. That is so sad. So it's, I mean, so like the silver lining is - Yeah, you've been impacted by it.

3:21I mean, we were meant to meet. Yeah. We were meant to meet. Oh, this might be a dad hug. You know what I mean? I call them God hugs. This is like, this might be your dad being like, hey, and I'm wearing my open heart surgery red, so. Oh, I love that. I love that. But I'm sure just being a survivor, first of all, Like, I can't imagine. I really can't even imagine what that's like. You're so young. You've gone through something so traumatic. But your perception of life must be completely different. And this happened. Happy anniversary. Thank you. Almost a year ago. Yeah, almost a year ago where I'm sure your life was completely turned upside down.

3:55So your perception of life and living intentional with purpose, I'm sure, is forefront in your life right now. So let's tell everybody, like, a little bit about you. Let's start there. Okay. And then we'll go into that and just how you live your life right now and what your intention is. But let's start where it really started. You started your first business 24 years old. Yep. So I literally started working when I was 13. So I grew up in a lot of trauma, like trailer parks, Georgia girl. And I just really, I think when I was 13, I didn't realize what it was, but I was struggling with depression.

4:26And I became this like operating depressed person who just threw all of my attention and energy into becoming a workaholic. So I started working. And even the time I was working for a small business and they couldn't really afford me for as long as I wanted to be there. So it's like, it's fine. I'll clock out and I'll just keep working. So I'd work like 12 hour days every single day because I just honestly didn't want to go home. And I just started taking on more and more responsibility. By 16, I was managing it. I was offered my own space like it was a restaurant. So I was offered my own location at 18.

4:57And I was like, I think I've gone to the top of where I'm going to go in this industry. I don't want to do that. So I started working at the largest PEO in the world, ADP. I'm sure someone's gotten a bank, like a check from there. I know ADP. Right? So it was really funny because it's an HR company and they asked me how old I was in the interview because I was 17 when I was interviewing. They're like, I think you're one of the youngest employees who's ever worked here. So I started doing that and just kept on trying to like climb this invisible ladder of success. Right. And then my sister booked 90210 after she had done NipTuck.

5:29and suddenly her brand was just like skyrocketing. But we were homeschooled. So coming from trauma and homeschool life, it was like very overwhelming for her. So she asked my oldest sister and I to come out to LA. And I'm like, I'm not sure about that because I was approved for my first house. I was 19. I had a whole plan, like picket fence. I was going to create the stability I hadn't had because I had moved like 32 times before I was 16 years old. So I was like, I just need life. I need the life that I'm in control of. But I got a job in LA and so came out here and started really making friends and connections and relationships.

6:06And then, you know, a couple of years later, I realized that I enjoyed hosting events. I liked the creativity, but I liked the structure. I'm a total nerd. I like to organize and plan every little micro detail. My husband. Spreadsheets, he told me. Oh, spreadsheets. I speak them fluently. Chat GBT is my best friend. It's really funny because my husband, before my surgery, would call me a type AAA. Like not like a type A, like like a nut job. But but anyway, so I started my first company, then I sold it at 24. And then that's when I started my second company. And it was honestly of all my life, all that work, the first time I asked myself, like, what do I actually want to do with my life?

6:43Like, what am I here for? And so I started doing female empowerment and trying to make a difference. And I started building this big community of influencers, celebrities, friends who I wanted to uplift and empower, encourage. And, you know, what I love about the word encourage is it comes from the word heart. So it's actually about putting courage in someone's heart. And that just really got me. And, you know, I built that for 10 years and then started running education, innovation at this big fashion trade show called Magic and loved it. It was like fashion candy land. I was booking talent, interviewing them, having so much fun.

7:19And then I got offered a show for Bloomberg Television called Female Founders. Girl, I got in the Jumbotron in Times Square. I was like, oh my gosh, we're filming at NASDAQ. I was like, oh my, I think I'm a little taller. Is it the heels? You know, I was like feeling her sound. I love that. And then it was like, and you have, like, you need heart surgery. It was literally like, just like that. It was so crazy. Everything was kind of poppy and all the things that I had climbed towards. And, you know, I think. Were you having heart problems? For eight years. I was passing out, passing out while I was trying to give birth to my baby, like shortness of breath, all the things.

7:53And then, you know, here I was living someone else's dream life. Because if you actually, like, look back at my history, I was doing so many things that I'm grateful. I'm so grateful for. I mean, it didn't even make sense. Like, the Bloomberg thing, like, literally a friend of mine was producing the show, took me out for dinner. I'm like, what? I should be taking you out for dinner. And just said, would you take on this show? We booked someone else, but I think you're the person. I mean, just crazy stuff that doesn't happen to normal people, right? And I was just like, how is this all happening?

8:21and then it was like, I really got fed up. And I'm a big believer, whether it's in business, your family, your life, that you will change when the fear and the pain of staying the same becomes bigger than the change, right? So I was like, you know what? I'm sick of feeling sick. I've got to figure this out. And I went to a different cardiologist and I've been going to the same person for eight years. We knew I had a condition that was congenital, but we weren't like getting clarity because he was like, yeah, but you know, it's a mild condition. I'm like, well, I'm having really extreme things and I'm in my 30s.

8:54Like in my early 30s, this can't be normal. And finally I was just fed up. I went to someone else and literally within two weeks it was like, I'm recommending open hearts. I'm recommending heart surgery. And I was like totally like loopy from the meds of like having been put under for this test. And so I, you know, all of a sudden my life just stopped and it was literally like, like heartbeats, like became so precious. Like I would come to rooms and I'd be like, whoa, there's so many heartbeats here because There's so many heartbeats and we take for granted every beat of our heart and every breath of our lungs.

9:25And then you start thinking like, why am I here, dude? Like, God, why did you create me and put me in this planet? Like, why am I here? There's got to be something more than all these things that I'm doing. There's got to be something more. And so my heart just almost like cried out for something. And then, you know, we're like rushing towards find the right surgeon, make the right decision. and I just keep looking at my little kid. My son was three years old and I would just like look at him and be like, like I'm trying to like keep it together, you know? By the way, it's so cute because right over there, the little plant goes in the shape of a heart on their balcony and I'm like, I see you, I see you.

10:02I love when that happens. I would just look at my son and I'd be like first trying to like act like I was chill because I didn't want to scare him. My son is like very intuitive and then I would just be like, I don't know how many more heartbeats I have with you little man, you know? Like, and so we got my heart, we did more tests and then it came down to like two weeks. Okay, now we're definitely doing surgery. You got two weeks. And it was like, how do I like cram a lifetime? So now you're like possibly planning out your life right now and what like what could be. Yeah. So the after of this, I can't even imagine.

10:36It was so weird, Mara. Like, it was so weird. I feel like it's like, how do you, like, think about it. You're going to go on a trip. You're planning. You got two weeks to plan for your trip. Oh, like maybe I need to order a new dress, get some new shoes. You know, it's like, how do you plan for in two weeks, they're going to stop my heart. And I don't know if it's going to start back. One in five people does not survive this surgery. So I'm trapped between, do I even do the surgery? Like, can I just like not do it? And then like see if my heart and they're like, maybe heart failure in the summer.

11:05I'm like, okay, well, that doesn't sound great. You know? And so you're, you're between genuinely a rock and a hard place. And, and I feel like, you know, my whole life I believed in God and everything, but it was literally like you get to this point and you've really got to figure out what getting your affairs in order means. You know, when they're asking for your, your will and all this paperwork, like everything becomes real serious, real fast. And if you're not standing on faith, that's bigger than you, then this is where type triple A reaches the end of herself. Right. Cause I, I'm going to lay on a table and be completely vulnerable to what's going to happen.

11:41And I have no idea how that's going to pan out. So I've got to trust that someone, something is looking out for me. And I'm not putting my trust in a surgeon, right? Because I believe that while extremely qualified and I have the most amazing surgeon, she's like, I'm obsessed with her. I love her so much. I love that she's a female. I know she's like the top chair at Cedars-Sinai. I mean, I'm like, yes, she is girl boss. That makes perfect sense. But with all of that, you know, at the end of the day, we're all human. We're all doing the best we can. And she didn't know the physical or the emotional heartbreak that I had faced my whole life.

12:14And when does a heart just give out? When do you just have too much? And so it was really after the surgery that all of the emotions started to come. And, you know, we've got this marketing agency, my husband and I, that's still operating. And my husband's kind of like, well, you know, you're not all like taped up. Are you, you want to get back into work? Like, are you going to do the show? Like people are asking, you know? And I just couldn't be about my old life. I couldn't. I was like, you know, I'm so, like, how do you go from conversations with your kid? Like, hey, remember, you got to choose God no matter what.

12:51Because when everything else fails you and it will in this life, you got to make sure you have him. Right? Like, how do you go from those conversations? Because you're looking at a clock and a date and it's getting, like, more in real. How do you go from that to, like, oh, so tell me about this kid? It's just so difficult to come back into a physical, normal world when you've had this, like, spiritual awakening in your soul. And so, um... So this is a year ago. You finally, like, have this awakening, true awakening, like, real awakening. Like, people say it, like, you embodied it. Yeah. So here you are, and now you're like, I have to live with meaning and purpose.

13:26You know, it's, like, just talking to you. Sorry to, like, even cut you off, But like, I think people don't realize that the way that we live our life and the things that we get upset about, and they're so menial until you actually face an experience that's truly life or death. So now you're at this crossroad and you're like, okay, I have to make a decision. I have to live with intention, purpose, and something that I really believe in. And now what happens? That's a beautiful question. And I really feel validated by what you've said because I feel like you get it like in that season. So I started praying, honestly.

13:59I was like, God, I want to do the Jesus thing. I don't want to do the racial thing anymore. Like I've been doing all the things that were like racial. Were you religious prior or no? I was, yes. I had actually had a pretty wild spiritual encounter in August of 2018 that changed my life. And then again, another one in June of 2019. And it really wrecked me. Like I was like, whoa, I was like a fire was birthed within me. But growing up, God was spoken about, but I. But not religious. Girl, I had no, like it was not good. It was like the church hurt stuff. You know what I mean? It was like some of the, like most godliest people were like the scariest people.

14:37So it's funny when I tell some people my stories, they're like, how do you even, I was like, because it's not the same thing. Yeah. Right. We think, we see like that and we think, oh, that's what it is. And I don't want anything to do with it. It's like, no, I'm talking about relationship. I'm talking about real faith. I'm talking about putting the very beat of your heart on God. The scripture literally says, trust the Lord your God with all your heart. So there's no way that I could trust more of my heart than to put my very heartbeat into someone else's hands, right? Like that is genuinely trusting someone.

15:07And so I feel like that has been just like this season of life of just like, what do you do now? Like, how do you do what you're here for? How do you carry that on? And so I launched a brand. I literally was in a Jama juice. I was in a very bad mood. So it wasn't like I was like breathing fresh. There wasn't a glow. It was just, I was in a Jamba Juice waiting for my food. And I literally saw someone walking out the front door. And on their back, I just saw a Holy Spirit vibe, like, appear on their back. And I was like, that's really cute. I like that thing. So I start checking. I look online. I look on social media.

15:42It's available, which is crazy because nothing's available. Like, if you're not spending 10 Gs on it, you're not getting that URL. There it is. It's right there, available. It's right there. Everything's available. So we do these charms. I love this. Isn't that fun? I keep looking at it. Yes, I love it. I absolutely love this. Well, I believe that, you know, we really overcome by the power of story, of testimony, of just hearing someone else coming to life. When I went back to magic for the first time after my surgery, one of my favorite guys, he's amazing. His name is Don. He is fabulous. And he literally was like listening to me tell my story because I haven't seen what's happening.

16:16Meanwhile, I'm wearing my hoodie that I've started, Holy Spirit vibe. I'm showing it for the first time. He's like, it's like you like went into this blender of difficulty and have come out a new person. and um and I I thought it was like well for one you're wearing sweats at magic now mind you I used to like do 14 outfit changes at magic it was like two twos and sequins and pearls you know so he was like this is weird in general but don't you think that like the um the truth of anything right you're how strong your business is it's based on your fruit like how it well is your business doing because everyone wants to like like flex like oh I've got this it's working my team loves me, everything.

16:51But like at the end of the day, what impact are you making? How is it impacting their families and their families' families? Because I look at it now as a leader because I was a terrible leader at times. I think we all can attest that we've had some bad leadership. Yeah. Some bad leadership. Things that we probably shouldn't talk about. Probably shouldn't talk about, right? Those moments. But I think about like how I had to have this awakening within me because I was putting so much pressure on myself as a leader that I needed to get it right. And the moment that I didn't have it right, it was the end, right?

17:20It was like, I'm sure you've heard this. Like your company's only as strong as you are, right? You have a day off. Your company is, that's not really true. And if you don't take rest, like for me, I'm like a Sabbath girl. So if you don't take rest, you actually don't launch forward. It's actually really good for you. I spend so much time like coming up with ideas in my rest time. So I think just learning that I was living my whole life upside down because it was the norm. Like for worldly standards, I was crushing it. Like I'm like, oh, you know, but then when you think about like, like there's a point in everyone's life and they're going to get to that moment and you could call it a midlife crisis.

17:56You could call it, you know, the end or whatever, but it's like you get to that moment and you really start thinking like, I don't think I want to do that. Because every time you say yes to something, you got to say no to something else. So am I saying yes to the right things? Right. Because I'm having to say no to other things. And I certainly don't want to be saying no to the right things while I'm saying yes to the wrong things. So now, okay, so now you launched a company. The company, they do, they, you do charms. We do charms. We do apparel. So hoodies, crewnecks. It's so funny because I never thought, I thought whatever I did would be like, like this, you know, dramatic.

18:28But like, no, that was not the plan. No, it's not. I mean, look, the way like, it's funny how life works, right? You always think you're going down one path and then all of a sudden throws you a curve ball and here you are and you're trying to figure it out. And it's so comfy. So I get to wear sweats all the time and it's like my job. It's marketing. It's great. I love that. So where are you located? Like, where's your brand at? In L.A. So all my apparel is here. Our supplier is in California. So I love that. And, you know, and I'm actually doing some really fun premium stuff now that will literally hand paint and do just like one-off pieces that are just more so about like kind of having this like beautiful, prayerful, creative expression.

19:06Because, you know, when you're ordering a ton of inventory and you're like me, it's like, I want to be a part of that. It's like, well, I can, we make these. We'll come out to events. I'll come and speak at conferences. These are geared towards what's personable to people. What's personal, yeah. So it's so personalized. So give me an example. For me, I love my kids, right? I love that. So maybe a mama for you. I have mama here. That's so cute. I mean, I'm just looking at all the different ones that you have. Can you explain the ones that you have? Because they're beautiful. Thank you. Okay, so this one right here is my heart.

19:35And it has a beat on it to represent how my heartbeat came back. When I was really scared for my surgery, I was told that I was going to soar through it. It was like this prophetic word. So I got an airplane. I was also like a little afraid of flying. And I started being like, dude, if like I'm afraid to fly. Okay, well, so I asked this woman. She's got really strong faith. I was like, well, what do you do about like fear of this happening or that happening? And she's like, what are you afraid of? What do you mean? She's like, well, nothing can happen because you're a child of God. Like nothing can happen that doesn't pass over his hand.

20:07So you have to like have faith that like he'll work all things together for good. And so I hold on to that like in moments where I get scared. So I would challenge myself with this airplane. I was like, Rachel, every time you see it, you need to really ask yourself, like, why am I feeling afraid? Because do I have faith or not? Because you're either you're believing an outcome. You're either believing it's a good thing or it's a bad thing. But you're either yielding to faith or you're yielding to fear. And so you have to kind of decide into that. I know that for me and my house, I don't want to roll like that.

20:35I move with faith. I believe the best thing. I speak life over my life, over my family, my business, especially my little man. like trying to teach him how to think about the world in a positive way. I mean, we had this like, oh, for like two months, he was dealing with a bully. Girl, I mean, so now having to. Don't talk to me about the bully. I'm an inappropriate mom. I'm so inappropriate. Do you come with a bat? No, but I'll get you on the side. I'll get the kid on the side. Yeah, I will get the kid. I'm coming for you. I'll put the fear in. Where's your mom? Yeah, right? Where's your mom, kid?

21:05Where's your mom? Well, you know, it was so interesting because I had to really hold those like, because I was like twitching about it. But what I realized was this was actually an opportunity for Jude to learn. Isn't that a sweet little name, Jude? I love that. For him to learn how to think about his own identity outside of what people would say to him. Because think about it again. If I've got two weeks left to live, I can't be the mama with the bat, you know, to show up and protect my baby. But I can teach him how to protect himself. And we start with the mind. Every battle starts in your mind.

21:34Every company starts at a thought. So we have to take full control of your thoughts and be aware of what we're doing. And so when I lead leaders, like I work with a lot of female leaders now, I'm like, listen, I'm all about leaders. I don't want to see you be at 99 % if you're meant to be 100%. I don't want to see you at 55%, even if that's the best you've ever done. I'm like, that's amazing. Let's celebrate that. And now let's get to 100%. But it doesn't necessarily mean 100 % of filling your schedule, 100 % of success and accolades. It's more about who are you created to be. Yeah. Like who like like like it's such a beautiful, beautiful opportunity that you're even born.

22:09There's one in 400 trillion chance that you're even here right now in this moment. How crazy is that? That's that's all the things that could have happened. Your parents could have just been two seconds later, a stoplight, all these different things. But you're here and now you have a platform. You built an incredible team. You built an incredible business. You have changed generational wealth for many families. a good person provides for their children's children, right? You've helped people do that. And now you have a platform to do that at scale, in a bigger platform, in a bigger conversation.