They Said She Couldn’t Do It — Then Gypsy Woman Dropped

0:00Were you ready for it? I was not ready. I thought maybe the song would be, because back then the house music wasn't very well known. It was really just underground. Nobody really was, wasn't on the radio or anything. So I thought maybe it would be big. I lived in Washington, D.C., maybe D.C., Baltimore, New York. And I was very happy about that. I remember going to the record label and I was in like the R &B department. And next week I went back, I was in the pop department. And I'm like, what happened? And the song had just blew up around the world. This is dance music. It's supposed to make you dance and move.

0:30And it's a good way to release all your stress and all your worries. You just go out there and just dance. That was very hard back then. Because you remember back then, if you got pregnant while you were assigned to a record label, they dropped you. I know a lot of girls that got dropped. Two little girls at home, you know how kids grab on your leg when you leave the house. And the label wasn't very understanding. I remember many times I was threatened. We're not going to put your record if you don't do this and do that. You have to be two people. You have to be Crystal Waters. And you leave that at the door when you get home.

0:57And then you be yourself. A little taste, a little love. I'm going to do la-da-dee-la-doo-dow.

1:02Crystal Waters:La-da-dee-la-doo-dow. La-da-dee-la-doo-dow. La-da-dee-la-doo-dow. La-da-dee-la-doo-dow. La-da-dee-la-doo-dow. La-da-dee-la-doo-dow. In my sleep, I see her begging, preaching, please.

1:22Crystal Waters:Although the party's not mine, I ask, gotta why? Gotta why? She's just like you and me But she's homeless She's homeless As she stands there singing her money La-da-dee, la-da-da La-da-dee, la-da-da La-da-dee, la-da-da La-da-dee, la-da-da Welcome back to the BILF pod, where authenticity trumps authority. Now, if you know dance music, you have to know this queen right here. Literally, I know you were in the club, bouncing around, 100 % pure love. So I don't even think I need to give you an introduction because you are really the queen over here, a real BILF. Queen, the mother of all mothers. Welcome back to the BILF.

2:16You really are. I am so—can you tell? I'm beaming. I'm so excited. Thank you so much. I grew up with your music. So welcome to the show, Miss Crystal Waters. Yay! So, oh my, I'm like, you know, I'm like fangirling over here to see you in person and just growing up with your music. It is incredible. Oh, thanks for having me. It's nice being here. Thanks for coming. Thank you. Thank you. So are you ready to dive deep? I'm ready for you. All right. So take it from the beginning. Take it from the way, like when, I mean, look, dance music has been a thing for many, many, many years. What year did you like finally start dropping the singles, like ready?

2:53I think my first single, Gypsy Woman, La-da-dee, La-da-da, dropped in 1991. And that was the beginning of everything for me. That was it. That's when it blew up. Were you ready for it? I was not ready. I thought maybe the song would be, because back then the house music wasn't very well known. It was really just underground. Nobody really was, wasn't on the radio or anything. So I thought maybe it would be big. I lived in Washington, D.C., maybe D.C., Baltimore, New York. And I was very happy about that. But when it went, I remember going to the record label and I was in like the R &B department.

3:24And the next week I went back, I was in the pop department. And I'm like, what happened? And the song had just blew up around the world. I didn't even have a passport, so. That is, that's crazy. But did you always know that you wanted to be a performer, singer? I did not, but I did grow up in a musical family. I was really shy and I was like the only one that really wasn't showing any like, you know, outward talent. Like I didn't play any instruments or anything like that. But my father was a jazz musician. My brother was a musician. My aunt was a very famous actress, singer, Ethel Waters. So it was always around me, but it just never crossed my mind.

4:01So when did you hone in on it? I got into it when, I mean, I always loved music. I got into it when I was working for the D.C. government, and they told me how much I will be making in the next 10 years. And you get this piece of paper, and they'll tell you how much you can make. You did probation. I was at the parole office. Yeah. People get that mixed up. I worked for the parole board. I issued warrants because I was a computer science major. So I had like the only computer in the whole building. And they had all the information. So I issued warrants and calculated jail time for inmates. I worked in parole.

4:34I did it. Yeah. Yeah. My background is criminal justice. I have a master's degree and undergraduate degree. I know you're looking at me like, what? No, I have questions. But I won't. What happened to this girl? Well, needless to say, I did not do, I ended up not doing it for a multitude of different reasons. But that's so funny, our parallel. But I think you quickly realize that you're probably not, you might love, you got to really love it. Yeah. I don't think I'm a nine to five girl. That getting up and. Listening to rules. Yeah. Somebody telling you how much you're worth. Yeah. Absolutely not for me either.

5:07Yeah. And then, okay, so then you decide. So where does it, like you write your music or it comes, like where does this happen for you? What year? I'm going to tell you the story because people always ask me. So once I found out I wasn't going to make any money, I was complaining to my mom. And she said, go see a psychic. She'll tell you what to do. So I went to a psychic that weekend. And on my way to the psychic, I lost my voice. It was so strange. And I get there and she says, you're not doing something with your voice. And I was like, yeah, right. That's an easy guess. I lost my voice. So I go back to the office and I tell everybody.

5:40And they're like, well, you love music. Maybe you want to do something with music. And a friend of mine had a cousin with a studio, and they were looking for background singers. And he said, I'll go if you go. So we went. I got the job. And that's when the light bulb went off. And I was like, this is where I'm supposed to be. So we did that. And then, you know, after it was over, I was like, what am I going to do? But I knew I could write. So that's when I got into it. And I found someone to write songs with. And that's when I started doing my demo and all that kind of stuff. And that's where it started.

6:09Was it like, remember back in the day where you had the demos in the back of your car and you had to like go out and hand them out? Close to it. Close to it. Because I had a bunch of cassettes printed up. I had, I used a Xerox machine at work to put my picture on it and like cut out the picture and did it all myself. But yeah, we gave it to everybody, anybody that was in the music business. So it was the psychic. Because yesterday, I'm not even making this up. Guess what I did yesterday? I went to a psychic. I never, I'm not even into it. And yesterday, literally, my girlfriend goes to me, Mara, you're here all the time.

6:41You have to do a very New York thing and go to a psychic. And I went yesterday to the psychic. Did you like it? I mean, I was a little, she said some things that, like, obviously, she was like, you're in a relationship, but I have a ring on my finger. But she knew that I had three kids, one being a girl and two boys. Like, she would not have known that. Yeah. So there were some things I was like, oh, okay. Yes. We got to be careful of some of them. But I think sometimes some people hit it. Yeah, I think so, too. Okay, so now. All right. So now you're getting into it. The single is out. You're making music.

7:10Everybody's in the club. Everybody's dancing. Now you also have two girls. Yes. So where does that family life balance fit in? That was very hard back then because you remember back then you couldn't even get – if you got pregnant, I don't know why you were assigned to a record label, they dropped you. Yeah. I know a lot of girls that got dropped. So it was very hard. So we didn't really talk about it. And to tour and have two little girls at home, you know how kids grab on your leg when you leave the house. and the label wasn't very understanding. I remember many times I was threatened that we're not going to approach your record if you don't do this and do that.

7:41So it was really hard. But I do remember Ed Eckstein was the president of the label at the time and he told me, he said, to keep your sanity, you have to be two people. You be Crystal Waters and you leave that at the door when you get home and then you be yourself. And that kind of, you know, it kind of helped because you turn it on when you have to and you can turn it back off because it's very hard to be on all the time. I see people who do it, But I mean, I can't do it. I think there's a balance. I mean, I travel all the time, too. And I think that I'm sure your kids know you as mom. Mommy.

8:12Right. Mommy. I wouldn't let them change. They grew up so fast. I was like, no, you still call me mommy. Yeah, mommy. I mean, but I'm sure they're so proud of you seeing what a mogul you are. I mean, and just the fact that you've been able to stay so relevant. Now, let's talk about that for a second. There are a lot of people, one hit wonders that come in, they come out. but somehow and this says a lot because not only are you a woman okay which we already know that society we think we've progressed but we have not really but here you are you have children and not only are you not a one-hit wonder but you're still in the game today so how were you able to stay so relevant with all your music and keep up with the time um I think as a couple of things I think at some point you know you kind of people always want you to have another hit another hit another hit at some point you know i had to say you know that might not happen and that it can't stop you because some people will just stop because they know it's not going to be a hit yeah and i just kept putting music out i just kept you know i have to write i wanted to write and i just kept putting music out um i found it important that at some point that you know you have to give back you know what i mean that's one of the reasons why i kind of started my podcast because i could give a platform for artists who didn't don't have a platform to play you know house music is not mainstream.

9:28Well, now it's kind of mainstream, but it wasn't mainstream. So I was giving a home to artists for, you know, somewhere to play the music. I mean, I also have a label. So it was also for me, you know, to give back and help others that, you know, want to be in this business. I love that because you have to have a purpose far greater than making money. There has to be something way beyond that. It has to, you know, you know, people say you got to have somebody to share with, you know, the excitement, the fun. You just can't do it and go home and sit and just keep it all to yourself. I mean, I think you give women such a huge voice too, that you can have it all.

9:56You can be a mom, You can be an entrepreneur. You can still look hip and look amazing. And you can. I think it is 100 % possible. So when women are like, oh, you can't have it all, I beg to differ. I think you can. You can. I mean, I think anybody, you have to do it yourself. You can't rely on anybody else. Yes. Amen. You can't. That's the way I was raised. You know, my dad died when I was very little. And the one lesson that my mom always told me is, unfortunately, life happens. Yeah, it does. And, you know, you have to— Happens fast. Yeah, it happens fast. Yes. And if something should happen to your spouse, you've got to be able to stand up on your own two feet and take care of your kids.

10:29And this is just kind of the motto that I always live by. So when people laugh, being in a male dominated industry, both of us, I mean, and I never saw it like that. I just thought I was in an industry. No, no, it's never like that. I know until you know, until there's some things that you can't do, you know, it's never what's good for the goose. But, you know, being able to have such a powerful voice for women and carry that on. Are your daughters also in the business? Um, they're creative. I will say that they're creative and they're very strong headed. They're very independent. I will say that.

11:01Yes. Yeah. When you think about your lyrics, are they, does it come from a place of storytelling or you, or you just want everybody to have a good time? Um, I think, I think I come from a place of storytelling. I think that's why, you know, I remember when I first started working, that's why the producers like work with me because I was actually had lyrics. I actually had stories and things to tell. So I usually try to like when I I may write something kind of lighthearted at first, but I always go back and go back until it gets deeper and deeper and deeper. Yeah, and that's kind of how you create your music.

11:32Yeah. I mean, that is so amazing. So now you're here, okay, where years, what are you, 30, over 35 years in the business? 35 years? I think it's 34 this year. Don't make me count. I know. I don't want to know. I know. 34 years in the business. but how are you still able to keep up with the trends and be relevant? That's hard. Yeah, I guess so. I think because of the genre of music I'm in, I mean, I'm in the clubs. I'm still in the clubs. I'm still, you know, touring. You're still in the club?

12:03Crystal Waters:Yeah. All my friends are DJs and things like that, so it kind of stays relevant. I think times have changed as well. It's like I think a lot of people are getting, even though they're getting older, they're still in the business. And I still see when my audiences, they may get younger and younger, but they still know the music. So it's been this kind of cross thing going on that keeps it all relevant, I think. For sure. My daughter knows all the lyrics, everything. Every old school song. And TikTok helps a lot. Oh, TikTok. Definitely, right? I mean, she knows. As soon as I was like, I'm going to see Crystal Waters, she's like, oh, I know exactly who it is.

12:39Right away. And my daughter's 17 years old. Wow, yeah. So, I mean, your music still continues to stay relevant. And who does not love, like, a good dance beat? Yeah. Yeah. People want to dance. They want to sing along, you know? Yeah. What's your take on music and how it's really, it's kind of shifted? It's shifted like one way we were just talking about where it became about bottle service and who got to sit in like VIP to kind of where it's at now. Do you think it kind of took away the fun? Yeah. I mean, I've seen people talk about how bottle service has killed the club life. So I see a lot of clubs moving away from VIPs and bottle service.

13:16people, you know, the cool people want to dance and they stop coming. So I think they want that crowd back and make it more about the music than, you know, about the bottle service and the girls and stuff. So I see a big change in that, which I'm very happy about. Yeah, me too. I mean, who goes to a club just to post up? You're going there to have a good time. I think, you know, I see people just with their cell phones, you know, with the staring at a DJ and not moving. I'm like, you guys have forgotten And this is dance music. It's supposed to make you dance and move. And it's a good way to, you know, release all your stress and all your worries.

13:50You just go out there and just dance. And I'm hoping to see that come back more. Yeah, me too, with more intentionality and purpose instead of kids going to the club. I see it with my kids. They come to the house. They don't even have a conversation. They're on the phones all the time. Oh, really? There's no conversation. They don't know how to communicate. But in the club, I mean, when you went to the club, correct me if I'm wrong, even I still go to the club. When I'm there, I'm there to have a good time. I don't want to be distracted with my phone. You talk to strangers. You meet different people.

14:16You're just having a good time, a good collaborative effort of just meeting new people. So that brings me to my next one. You've collaborated with a lot of people. So let's talk about that. What were some of your, I don't want you to name drop and say mean things, but what were some of your best collaborations? You know, I haven't done many vocal collabs, but I've worked with different producers. I think the most famous was Jimmy Jam and Terry Lewis. which was, you know, like a dream come true, you know. So that was a good one. But most of my collabs, I mean, I collab with a lot of producers, a lot of DJs, and I look for producer-producers, not just DJs who want to put a vocal on a track.

14:57So that's the kind of producers I like working with and seeking out. I love that. Yeah. And still to this day, you're still making your own music, new stuff, but not focused on the hit single, just having a good time. Yeah, I just got to get it out and get it out, you know. I think people will find that the industry has changed so much. So it's more about the independent artists. You got the mainstream. If you want Taylor Swift and all those, you know where to go. But people are actually seeking independent music, something that's a little different. And you can create your own community. So you got to create for the people who like what you do.

15:28What do you think about women in this space in general? I know we touched a little bit. What do you think? Do you think it's harder? Do you think there's a lot of stigma? What do you think about the women? I think it's getting better, the voices are getting louder. I just did a remix contest with Change the Beat for only female remixers. And we had like over 60, 70 submissions. People don't even, you know, it gave a platform for people to see that there's female DJs and producers out there. So I think the voices are getting louder. I think females have more of an opportunity now because it's shifted from the major labels being in control of their music to the smaller independents.

16:11And they're more accepting and more willing to put females out there more than the majors, I think. Yeah, especially ones that have families because even in my line of work, I do sales. If you have a family, it's really hard. It's hard for the females. It's like a double-edged sword. They're good, but then they have families and it's always like a constant juggle. How do you, how were you able to balance that? Like I said, it was hard. It was a lot of fighting. I know like, you know, now over the years, you have to just learn to say no and be tough about it. Because they will dismiss you if you don't speak up, you know.

16:44So that's what I've learned. How were you able to balance it though with being a good mom and then also being, like how were you, were there sometimes I'm sure? I don't know if it was balance. It was juggling. A little juggle here, a little juggle there. A little, you know, not everything worked out perfectly. So I can't say it was perfect. Yeah. But, you know, you live and you learn. And, you know, it works out in the end. And allow yourself grace. I think that's one thing we don't do. We're so tough on ourselves trying to be the mom. I don't know if you were this mom. I'm definitely the mom that is like I come to the football games.

17:15I'm disheveled. I'm like trying to make it here, you know, and then like one thing's going really well here and then the other one's falling here. And the work like and I love that you said it because I don't think there is such a thing as balance. I think there is such thing as what's taking precedence now. I just feel like you shouldn't give up on your passion no matter how hard it gets. Because once you give up what makes you, you know, happy, then you have nothing. So, I mean, I know you have your kids, but if you love doing singing or songwriting, don't give it up. I agree with you. I think that you have to fill your own cup as a mother and as a woman.

17:44And in order for me, at least, to be a good mom, a good wife, I have to do, and that might sound selfish, but I have to do what makes me happy. Otherwise, I'd never be able to make them happy. Yes, exactly. So I'm sure it was definitely harder for you on every way possible. Yeah, it was, you know, for the kids to have a famous mother coming to the, you know, the practice, the basketball practice, it was a little different. Were they embarrassed? Were they like, Mom? Sometimes, sometimes. But, you know, but the kids want you to show up, so you have to show up. You do. Do you have rules? My kids have, I have rules.

18:19Like what? I have rules. There's rules about what I can wear in front of the front. Oh. They prefer me to be a mute. I like just not talk. Sweat pants. Yeah, sweat pants. Yeah, no boobs out. No, everything completely covered. Don't say anything cringe. Park the car. You can't bring. We have a Rolls. I can never bring that. So I have to bring like another car because that's everything I do is embarrassing. Oh, okay. I don't know. I don't know if you had the rules. No, we didn't have any rules. No, we didn't have all those though. No, your kids are. I don't think, you know, I'm pretty conservative.

18:49So no, they didn't have to worry about that. Well, that's good. My kids still, they get me every time. But what happens when you're just Crystal Waters? You peel back everything. Like, what does that look like for you? Crystal Waters. Crystal Waters is really just a jeans and a t-shirt person who likes to meditate and, you know, do breath work and go walk barefooted. I just, I like to, I like more metaphysical stuff.

19:14Crystal Waters:Yeah. Stuff like that. To keep you grounded. Yeah, I need to, because I travel so much and I'm like, you know, you give, you give, you give. give you, I have to go back and fill that cup back up, you know. So what do you do? Just a lot of, do you do Pilates, just meditation? Are you doing sound bowls? I would love to do Pilates if I could have the time, but it's usually a morning thing. I have a morning routine where I do the first things I do is meditate. Then I do breath work. Then I do affirmations. And then, you know, depending on the day, then I have, you know, I do my vocal exercises. So as long as I start the day doing what I love first and then I can go out and start working.

19:50It's so crazy. There's so many parallels between you and I. I have a morning routine to go to the gym all the time. But can you explain why that's so important just to clear your head and to be one with you? Yeah, you have to clear. First of all, you got to stop fighting with people who aren't in the room. A lot of times we wake up with the argument from last night or whatever happened. So you got to clear that out and you got to find that peace. You got to find that peace because you want to set the tone for the day because once how you wake up and how you set the tone is how your day is going to go.

20:19So if I wake up cranky, that's not how we're going to get out of the bed. You know, we're going to go work on it and make sure I wake up with peace and happiness. What happens? I mean, you're human. So what about those days where you just don't want to get out of bed? What do you do? Some days I'm lucky I don't have to because I don't have that nine to five. But usually if, you know, I'm kind of on automatic sometimes, especially if I'm traveling, I have to get up. It's amazing. My body will do it. I'll get up, go and be at the airport, you know, at 8, 9, whatever. And I just have to do it. I just do it.

20:51It's a whole mental exercise. I think at this point I've been meditating so long I don't have that problem too much. Right. When I'm traveling so much and I've only had three, four hours of sleep, that's when it gets really difficult in the mornings or, you know, trying to work that day. Usually Mondays are the worst days for me because I'm usually tired. Are you still showing up, though? Oh, I think so. I do my best. I do my best. It's hard. I mean, you have to allow yourself, Grace, but I think a lot of women, sometimes they give the excuse why they can't. I have my period or I just can't do this, but like, you got to get up.

21:27You got to go. Yeah. I mean, I tell people this Monday, just don't ask me. It just makes life easier. We don't have to go through it. I'm going to say no. So you just got to work with it. I mean, you have so many things coming up. Let's talk about what you really have coming up this 22 piece can we talk about this first let's talk about let's talk about you look so excited like you're theming i love it so is this something like you've been putting together where did this concept come from um this is something this concept where are you going can i be there yeah yeah yeah they have been doing this in europe for i guess at least a decade where they've been celebrating dance music with orchestration and i've done a couple of them a lot of the artists on the show have.