In short
The episode is a comedic “wine school” session at WSET School London, where hosts Alan Carr and Lee Pitt test whether they’ve learned anything about wine tasting. They start with banter about London East End roots, moving house, and smoke alarms, then open a Tesco Finest Prosecco Rosé deal (club card £6.50) and discuss surprising wine facts (even expensive wine can cause hangovers; screw caps aren’t bad). The main segment brings in Shane Jones, a WSET wine educator (teaching ~7 years; previously worked as an economist). Shane leads a WSET systematic tasting approach: observe color (lemon vs gold), smell for notes, taste for acidity/body/tannin, and use a spittoon. Guests taste three German wines: Mosel sparkling “Daniel Fries” (youthful lemon, fresh acidity), Lemberger/Blaufränkisch red (ruby, violet notes, tannin/spice), and Pfalz Riesling “Dr. Berklin-Wolf” (slim fluted bottle shape).
Key claims
technique prevents emotion from skewing observations; acidity = freshness; tannin dries the palate. Notable example: Alan is declared the winner for correctly rating the Riesling as “outstanding.”
Written by AI. May contain mistakes. Listen to the episode to check what was said.
Chapters
Tap a time to open that second in VOGin in London Town
0:00 to 0:39
Discussion about gin, personal anecdotes, and East London.
“That's the sound of zero sugar, 200 milligrams of caffeine, and the power to burn body fat.”
Gin in London Town
0:48 to 1:10
Discussion about gin, personal anecdotes, and East London.
“It can help you with practically anything on the web, like restoring a vintage motorcycle from a 50-page restoration block or finally break down that long article you've had open for weeks.”
Gin in London Town
1:41 to 3:24
Discussion about gin, personal anecdotes, and East London.
“Yes, every week we sniff, we swirl and we confidently misuse words we've heard other people say about wine.”
Smoke Alarm Mayhem
3:24 to 5:20
Alan shares a stressful experience with smoke alarms at his place.
“People are watching this going, why does Alan look rough?”
EastEnders and Celebrity Dogs
5:20 to 7:14
Conversations about EastEnders, celebrity sightings, and personal reflections.
“I burst out laughing because for some reason...”
School Days and Memories
7:14 to 9:10
Alan and Lee share stories from their school days and experiences.
“allowed on albert square i said wellard and willie oh yes i know that's not the name of your dogs they were the EastEnders.”
Choosing the Perfect Wine
13:23 to 14:01
Discussion on selecting wine, including personal preferences and tips.
“what is the best way to choose a bottle of wine?”
Prosecco Cheers!
14:01 to 15:59
Exploring the delightful flavors and qualities of Tesco's finest Prosecco rosé.
“So we've got, this is the Tesco finest Prosecco rosé, and it is now, with a club card, just£6.50.”
Wine Surprises and Stories
16:30 to 19:09
Discussing surprising facts about wine and personal anecdotes around drinking.
“What's the most surprising thing you've learnt about wine?”
Childhood Memories and First Crushes
19:10 to 22:46
Sharing nostalgic stories about school crushes and youthful experiences.
“But basically, they wouldn't let me take it because I said, oh, I'll take it in my tote bag.”
Show all 25 chapters
Meet the Wine Expert
23:22 to 28:00
Introduction of wine educator Shane Jones and discussion about wine education.
“Right, so my name is Shane and I'm a wine educator based here at the WSCT School London.”
Corporate Life Reflections
28:00 to 28:50
Explore Alan's past experiences in the corporate world and the quirks of commuting.
“I was in the corporate world, trudging along in a suit, in Bishop's Gate, hating every moment.”
Introduction to German Wines
28:50 to 30:28
Alan and Lee discuss different types of German wines they will taste.
“I never go for German wine when it's on the menu.”
The Educational Approach to Wine Tasting
30:28 to 31:29
Learn about the systematic approach to tasting wine from WSET.
“going west but we want to be going no you don't like that it's wset it is what it is sorry it is what it is okay now sorry no i think you're gonna get attention no you don't like that Sorry about this.”
Understanding Wine Glassware and Notes
31:29 to 33:08
Discover the importance of glassware and making notes during wine tasting.
“and you'd get like a tabloid and then it'd have the footprints on it where you'd get off with people and where you'd put your pint down?”
The Role of Spittoons in Wine Tasting
33:08 to 34:24
Alan and Lee discuss the use of spittoons and wine etiquette.
“Now, if you don't behave, I'll bring out my wine whip.”
Sensory Exploration of Wine
34:24 to 36:40
Learn how to observe and describe the appearance of wine.
“You like slamming things down, don't you?”
Smelling and Identifying Wine Aromas
36:40 to 38:48
Discover techniques for identifying different aromas in wine.
“Well, I'll tell you the things that you, if you see them, what they equal.”
Tasting Wine: Techniques and Observations
38:48 to 41:28
Learn the proper technique for tasting wine and making observations.
“So before we put it in our mouth, we have to bring it to the nose.”
Wine Tasting Etiquette and Practice
41:28 to 42:00
Alan and Lee discuss how to swirl and taste wine effectively.
“And I can see that you haven't done this before.”
Exploring Wine Tasting Techniques
42:00 to 44:30
Learn effective techniques for tasting wine, including acidity and flavor profiles.
“such that we can understand what we have in our mouth.”
Introduction to German Wines
44:30 to 47:20
Discover different German wine regions and their distinct varieties.
“And you can buy this at various retailers online, around£30 or something like that.”
Assessing Wine Quality
47:20 to 55:40
Understand how to assess the quality of wine through tasting and evaluation.
“Because I've been spitting and it's been going down my top.”
Wine Quality Discussion
56:05 to 57:01
The hosts evaluate the quality of a specific Riesling and share their thoughts.
“Usually there are four, but I'll give you three options.”
WSET Insights and Fun Banter
57:01 to 57:46
Discussion about wine education and a light-hearted exchange between the hosts.
Transcript
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0:36So you can make the most out of every decade and dance break. Learn more at drinkag1.com. This episode is brought to you by Google Chrome. You think you know a browser, but Gemini and Chrome, that's new. It can help you with practically anything on the web, like restoring a vintage motorcycle from a 50-page restoration block or finally break down that long article you've had open for weeks. Gemini and Chrome is here for it. Ready to make anything online make sense? There's no place like Chrome. Check responses set up required, compatibility and availability varies 18 plus.
1:09Alan Carr:We are about to learn if we have actually learned anything in this podcast. I'm green juice and then did a lunge and nearly shouted over my yoga mat. Hallo, wie heißt du, ich heiße Gabby If you don't behave, I'll bring out my wine whip Pineapple, pineapple For those listening, Lee's just putting his clothes back on Well, karma's a bitch, isn't it Shane?
1:40Alan Carr:Hello and welcome to Bottoms Up with Alan Carr and Lee Pitt Yes, every week we sniff, we swirl and we confidently misuse words we've heard other people say about wine. And... Well, we're not having a wine. Well, we're not having a wine. We're having London Dry Gin because we're in London Town, but not just London Town, East London. Bermondsey. Yeah, where my family are from. I didn't know this. I thought they were from Northampton. No, my mum's side, they're all from Bermondsey. They used to work in the glue factory in the tanning yard. And there was a rumour that my great, great, great, great, great aunt was Annie Chapman, dark Annie, who got murdered by Jack the Ripper.
2:23Alan Carr:Oh. Is that why you've got a fascination with... Yes, I think that's why I murdered people. Yes. I can't stop. Well, it's true. Yes, yes. That makes sense about your mum. She's got a bit of like that East End-y... What do you say? She's a bit like a sex worker. She's got... That's my mother. No, she's got like an East... I could see her working in EastEnders. Oh, yeah, she's like, God bless you. Yeah, she's a bit like that, apples and pears. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. And we went to EastEnders recently, didn't we? Cheers, by the way. Yes, cheers. This is a Sipsmith London Dry Gin. I do love a gin. Do you know what, though?
3:01Alan Carr:I used to drink gin all the time in my 20s, but I've kind of... I sometimes forget about gin. Vodka for me, but then sometimes on a sunny day, and I like that Hendrix, you know, you put the cucumber in. Yeah, you want to steal a bit of boozy. That's not, you know, summer's here. I'm sorry, I just got agitated then. Why? Well, I'm just a bit on edge with you. Okay. People are watching this going, why does Alan look rough? I've been up since 4am because my smoke alarms, six of them, were going beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep. And I... Yeah. Okay. So I'm staying at Alan's at the minute. kindly which is third week still can't get the right recycling sacks but that's fun you're snide the other day he goes he leaves the house he goes i don't think you deserve to have this candle on blows it out well it was it was an expensive candle today i hear that you are Febreze.
4:06Alan Carr:What? I gave a little bit of Febreze on the couch. I thought, that's good enough for Lee Peer. You treated me the other day. You popped on an Ambipure. But I heard, beep, lay, lay. Oh, I've never seen rage like it. I couldn't turn off the smoke alarm. I know. And it wasn't even fire. There wasn't fire. And you being you, you dealt with it calmly and collectively. Unleashedly, you ripped them off the wall and you threw them in a blind range. And if the insurance company is watching this, I dismantled them and put them on the thing. No axe was used. They're all smashed up now. I know. Shit. Oh, no.
4:46Alan Carr:And then there are these high-tech ones that when you press the button, it goes, is there a fire? Carbon monoxide? Smoke? It's getting worse. I'm like, nuclear apocalypse? It's like, stop. Zombies. Zombies. Zombie attack. Zombie attack. So, yeah, I mean, I just don't know. So, yeah, I look awful. I'm really stressed because I'm moving house. You booked too much in. I came downstairs. I have to work to pay for the castle. Well, yes. And I tried OnlyFans. No one was interested. You lost money. I know. No one wants to see my feet. No, I came down. I burst out laughing because for some reason... It's not funny.
5:25Alan Carr:You decided to book in a personal trainer today who came round and he's in the garden. You're looking well. Thank you. He's in the garden. And Bumpton, who's lovely. As I came down, all I heard was, Alan, do you like Star Wars? And I went, not really. He's living his worst life in the pissing rain. He does need better banter. He's got great abs, but his banter sucks. He told me once about having a green juice and went, yeah, I said, Alan, have green juice. Don't have Cocoa Pops. I love Cocoa Pops. He says, have green juice, and then did a lunge and nearly sharted over my yoga mat.
6:09Alan Carr:True. So, yeah, so just so you know anyone worried about my house, there is an electrician coming around and putting them all up. But it's just beep, beep, beep, beep. I know that's what they're supposed to do, but how can they were all beep beep do you remember Superman when there was trouble beep that's what I was like yeah yeah it was one was beeping and then when you ripped it off the wall it carried on beeping we were like I know and there was no wire attached to it it was going beep beep beep listen we listen man I'm talking about his sender oh yes sorry go on I went to Albert Square I know I know well I helped you out with the dogs and I will say I was filming something that's all a bit hush hush yes let's just say the queen vic has got a new gay landlord let's just say he's that desperate for money he's now running a pub in albert square no it was a it was a thing a thing and you'll all see it but we probably has already come out actually yeah but and then dogs aren't allowed on albert square i said wellard and willie oh yes i know that's not the name of your dogs they were the EastEnders.
7:22Alan Carr:When you think about it, Wellard and Willie, they knew what they were doing calling it that. Yeah, I've never actually made that connection with Wellard, but it must be like, yeah, Wellard. Because I haven't seen EastEnders for ages, so I was like, last time I watched it, do you remember Mary the Punk and Dr. Legg? No, I was like, I remember Trevor and Little Moe when she whacked him with the iron. Oh, yes, yes. That was like the EastEnders. And then Cheryl, do you remember when Cheryl collapsed? No, Cheryl. Cheryl Ferguson. Oh, I love Cheryl Ferguson. Yeah, she collabs. But I haven't seen any recently, so I was a bit worried.
7:54Alan Carr:What soap would you be in? Dynasty. Dynasty. Dynasty. Yeah, I love that. I think I was... The first time I realised I was gay was when that gay man punched that blonde man. Do you remember that? No, mine was Man O Man. Eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh. Don't ever do that again. Fire alarm goes. What is that? Why are you... Is that sweating? Why are you... Is that sweating? I went out in the rain. I don't know why. I just went out, so it's raining. It's not sweat. And where's that? What brand is that? That's Pucci, thank you. I can't actually see it because it's all wedged between your two tits.
8:29Alan Carr:Oh, nice. You could be in Dynasty, you're right. And I was walking the dog's wheel. Guess who I saw? A woman walking a dog like this. And she went, oh, Jake Gyllenhaal's dog. While Jake Gyllenhaal's over here, she's walking the dog. So I was trying to get the dog to shag my Rita. so then I could be related to Jake Gyllenhaal. I don't think it works like that. I'm no ancestry... I just want to knock on the door with a pregnant dog. Excuse me. Your dog has impregnated my child. Yeah, but yeah, no. Give me a million pounds and I'll be quiet. I don't think she should be going round shouting she's got Jake Gyllenhaal's job.
9:10Alan Carr:I know, because you could kidnap the dog. Listen, we need to talk about where we are, actually. Where are we? So we're at WSET School London, all very fancy. were going to school. What were you like in school? Were you a... Because you're quite... I will say this. What? Alert. Pop on a warning. There's a compliment coming. Okay? Okay. You're quite intelligent. And so I imagine you were quite brainy at school. Were you? I liked hanging around dinner ladies. Right. Why? I was the kid that held the dinner ladies' hand. And I knew all their first names. Hi Val. I hope your smear goes all right. Yeah, I used...
9:51Alan Carr:I knew all the trouble. Janine's, I'll be there. Janine's husband's in prison again. Right, okay. I knew all the gossip. Yeah, from the Denali. Couldn't read or write, but I knew all the gossip. You could chat. Yeah. Yeah, well, I think I've said this before, but when I became head boy, because power is not good for me. No, no. And I considered... It's always the little people. It's always the short people who are like... You know, yes. And I... That little Napoleon you were. I'm glossing over, glossing over. And I consider myself equal to the staff. Because I was like, oh God. So I started calling them by their first name.
10:29Alan Carr:So I'd be like, Joan, I need a word. No way. But I kind of like, I think they quite liked it. It was quite fun. Do you remember when you found out the teacher's first name or when you saw your teacher shopping on a Saturday? I know, yes. Out in the wild. I know, like. I used to think they would have lives. What were you like at exams? because I used to love exams. Do you know what I used to do during exams? I remember if I was struggling, I used to write asides in the exam because I think if I could make them laugh, so I'd write something like, Henry VIII did this. Chance would be a fine thing.
11:02Alan Carr:Oh, no, you did it. Why would you do that? Just to try and zhuzh them up a bit because if they're reading exams, they get bored. It would be a bit like, oh, you know, speaking of Henry VIII, I was dressed as him over the weekend. Well, you know, your fetishes... No, I was doing a show. I was doing a show for the BBC, and obviously, you know, there was a lot of cost-cutting going on. They couldn't stretch to six wives. Oh, no, why? Just couldn't afford six wives. They had to get a receptionist to dress up as Catherine of Arrogant. Good, well, I'm sure people who pay the BBC licence fee are relieved.
11:35Alan Carr:Well, there you go, yes. Anyway, we're at the WSET. And this is We Learn, don't we? People come here, if you want, like maybe bar staff, sommelier, or someone like that, just want to know about wine. Not just wine, spirits, beer, sake. Is that how you say it? I think so, yeah. And basically, loads of people will say to us, I'm sure you get this, well, you must know loads about wine now, blah, blah. Well, we're going to put that to the test, aren't we? Because we're going to have a teacher come in and actually see if we've learned anything during this. We might not be a teacher. He might have got ill.
12:07Alan Carr:We might have a supply teacher. Do you remember that? And you'd write your name down on the thing and it was like, pull my cock. And you'd get a thick supply teacher. You'd pull my cock. Pull my cock. And then you'd laugh and then you'd get thrown out. Why am I being thrown out? You're stupid. Well, you know what happened to me once? What? I crossed out on the table. Someone had written on the table, Piot is bent. No. Inscribed it into the table. I crossed it out. I got detention for graffitiing. I said, I'm crossing out. No. Piot is bent. He said, that's still graffiti. I was punished. What, but, oh, that's homophobia.
12:47Alan Carr:Thank you. Oh, my God. And I said, I'm head boy, because I remember getting sent out of the lesson once. He said, oh, a prefect of the school being sent out. I went, that's head prefect, I think you'll find. Oh, my God. Nicholas. It's gone now. It's gone now. So we're going to learn things at the WSET, and anyone can do this, can't they? They can apply from beginner to expert. So if you just want to learn a little bit more about wine, or if you want to become a sommelier, this is the place to go.
13:20Alan Carr:This episode is brought to you by Tesco and we are asking, what is the best way to choose a bottle of wine? Do you go for like a fancy bottle or is it because something might be on offer? Or do you let the experts lead the way? Well, with Tesco, you're in great hands because they know everything about wine and they even have recommendations of the week like this one. It's Tesco's Wine of the Week. Wine of the Week. Wine of the Week. Wine of the Week. Wine of the Week. Okay. Week. Let's get this open. Now, I will say this. Prosecco, a nice rosé, bubbly Prosecco. Oh, it screams celebration, doesn't it?
14:03Alan Carr:I can open it. Oh, babes, come on, I'm gasping. I know, I know. So we've got, this is the Tesco finest Prosecco rosé, and it is now, with a club card, just£6.50. Come on, Alan. By the time you open this, the offer will have expired. I know, I know, I know. Do you want me to help, babes? Oh, yes! Yay, he's got it. Maybe it should have been wine of the month. Hello! Okey-dokey. We can tell it's bubbly. Right, so. We've got gentle bubble. Oh, look at that. A nice rosé prosecco. That made this a summer in a glass. Now, I will say, Tesco, I genuinely love, like, when you go to a nice big Tesco, all the wines there, but sometimes you're a bit like, how do I pick it?
14:52Alan Carr:How do I go for that bottle? And I am, I will say, I am often led by the offers. If I see a little club card deal, I'm like, boom, I'm doing it. Cheers, bottoms up. That's so nice. It looks like, is it fresh? Yeah. I love it. It's fresh, fruity, and totally drinkable. Well, it's apparently made in Veneto, which is between the... Veneto, darling. Oh, Veneto. It's like your favourite dessert, Vionetta. Veneto. It's between Venice and the Dolomites, and that's why it's got such a rich... Yeah, because it's kind of warm climate, but you've got those kind of cool Alpine nights. So drinkable. And like I said, there is something about, because I love Prosecco in general, but there is something about a rosé Prosecco that I just think elevates it.
15:37Alan Carr:and you see that Tesco finest label, boom,£6.50 with a club card. Hello? £6.50? That's what I'm saying, until the 13th of July, just in time for my birthday. Oh, yeah. Which is when? This year.
15:56Alan Carr:Don't miss my birthday or this offer. Head to tesco.com or any of your local Tescos to pick up a bottle for just£6.50 with your club card. Teas and Cs, drink aware, 18+. Tesco finest, Prosecco, Rose, 75cl, ends 13th of July. Club card or app required, available in majority of larger stores and online, excludes Express, Woosh and Scotland. Thank you, Tesco. Bottoms up.
16:30Alan Carr:What's the most surprising thing you've learnt about wine? um oh the most surprising thing even if you drink an expensive bottle of wine you still get hangover yes yeah that is i thought i didn't think you'd get one i think the most surprising thing is i the the screw cap you know i used to think that i used to look down on screw caps it would be like you know no no they're right i think the most surprising thing for me after six months is that we're still alive. Yeah, we're still drinking it. We're still drinking. There's so much more to get through. Normally for me, typical Gemini, after six months, I get so bored of everything.
17:12Alan Carr:I'm not bored. I want to keep on drinking. I need to tell you this. Oh no, what? I went, I got invited because I'm getting invited now to wine things, loving it. Yeah. Went on this boat with a wine called Opus One. Yeah. Amazing wine. You'll have to ask the teacher if he knows it. I'm sure he does. It goes to me, have this what bottle would you like what vintage did you like okay vintage vintage I said I liked the 2014 really hot day went on a boat guess what London Tower Bridge opened for us that was a flair are you sure it was for you there wasn't like a massive ferry behind with Jane MacDonald on it yeah singing Queen of the Night no it opened it was like orchestra anyway got this bottle 600 pound bottle of wine you've got 600 Well, where's that in my house?
18:03Alan Carr:There's a 600-pound bottle of wine in my house. You're not having it. You probably use it to smash up your fire alarm, basically. No, I went, I've got to go to Brighton. I declare this smoke alarm open. I know, I said, I had to go to Brighton. You cheeky shit. There's some nice wine in my house, and you come down pleading poverty. Oh, Alan, can I have something from your wine rag? And you're sitting on liquid gold. Feels good. No, basically, it's not in your house. Because I had to go to Brighton. Crank it. It's in my liver. I had to go to Brighton for a gig. I'm always bloody gigging, as you know.
18:49Alan Carr:I'm sick of it. God, being a stand-up comedian. It takes the piss because every day I'm like, I wish this gig was... Well, my mum's a cheeky cow as well because sometimes, you know, listen, we do have a lovely, charmed life going on stage, but I remember saying, oh, I've got a gig tonight, I can't be bothered. My mum starts going, there's no business, like show business. I'm like, piss off. You should go back to Bartley Card in the call centre. You were happy there. I'm like, all right. I can have a little moan. Yeah, it's all relative, I think. But basically, they wouldn't let me take it because I said, oh, I'll take it in my tote bag.
19:20Alan Carr:You will not take that bottle in your tote bag. So it's been stored in someone's wine fridge because they said it would get cooked in the heat. And do you remember the other day when we had a... And this story getting me gayer. Do you remember when we had a... They wouldn't let me put me£600 wine in me tote bag. I'm going to dare you. I'm off to Brighton.
19:43Alan Carr:Stereotypes exist. They do, for a reason. I can't stand stereotypes. So, who's going to know more? That's the thing. Because I'm quite competitive. so I'm going to take this seriously. I'm going to be teacher's pet. No, I'm going to attack this like a smoke alarm. At least smash it on the floor and scream, I hate my life.
20:10Alan Carr:I think you'll surprise yourself. I think I'll surprise myself, yeah. I'm just looking forward to, I mean, it's school. Will it be, because you know school dinners, they're not the nicest dinner. What's school wine like? Oh, yes. Yeah, well, we're about to find out. Yeah. Bring on the... What? Would there be a dinner lady serving the wine? Scratching her tit. Well, we'll soon find out because the lady will be holding that. No, you don't know why. Here you go. You know what, I used to... The dinner ladies used to give me extra because in primary school I used to wear a tie. It was optional and I was the only person that would wear a tie.
20:50Alan Carr:And they used to give me extra food. That's cute, isn't it? That is so good. Because I found my report the other day. I can just picture you. You're a right little shit. No, I found my report the other day and it said something like, Lee often will come in and tell the class news that he has learned about other people. And it basically read like he's a gossiping gay. Like he loves to share news that have happened to him and other people. He's very imaginative with his stories, it used to say, like my school report. That was quite good. Because I'm moving, I found a load of my old school photos.
21:28Alan Carr:Honestly, you know like those old things, you know when you go like that, you know, the movement, like an old cartoon. This cold sore travels around my face. I never got rid of it. Honestly. Are you sure it's a cold sore? You can't get a cold sore on your forehead. I can. Traveled up. Look at you. Traveled up, honestly. Who was your first crush? Val, the dinner lady. Was it? Yeah Mine was Jade A girl called Jade It's spelt with a Y J-A-Y-D-E And I saved up my£5 a week allowance I went to H.W. Samuel Is it H. Samuel? H. Samuel, yeah Yeah, W.H. Smith No, I went to H. Samuel And I bought her a necklace and earrings for completing year 11 Oh my God, that's lovely I wonder what she's doing now I know, Jade Dilk she was called My first question was Lucy Swan and I took her to Alton Towers.
22:23Alan Carr:Did you? And she sprained her ankle and some pixie boots on the log flume.
22:31Alan Carr:Oh, what's she doing now? I don't know. Still on the log flume. Still stuck there. Still stuck there. She walks the log flume. Round and round. She's on the ghost train. Oh dear, let's speak to the teacher, shall we? Yes. Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. Bombs up. Plan B is a backup birth control option that's there for you when things don't go according to plan. It specifically works after unprotected sex and before pregnancy occurs by temporarily delaying ovulation. Plan B is available nationwide at all major retailers and through delivery apps like DoorDash. No ID, prescription or age requirement.
23:11Alan Carr:It's the number one OBGYN recommended brand of emergency contraception and it won't impact your future fertility. That's freedom to be. Use as directed. at ZocDoc we know being a healthy adult is like living in a video game every day has side quests taxes laundry birthdays and just when you're leveling up you have to book a doctor the insurance portal crashes they put you on hold your doctor doesn't take your plan game over we see you so we made booking a doctor easy download ZocDoc search by specialty insurance and availability book instantly no cheat codes required find a doctor you love with ZocDoc
23:54Alan Carr:joining us now is a certified wine wizard he's a vineyard virtuoso a cork commander and a grape guru yes he is the wset titan who is joining us to put our knowledge to the test we are about to learn if we have actually learned anything in this podcast it's the one it's the only shane jones Shane Shane Yes We're nervous Why? We don't like failure I'll settle your nerves Don't worry You've got an air about you I have to say Shane Or you're too kind You've got a kind of It doesn't surprise me You work in wine Right You've got a kind of Sophistication Yeah That's what I'm getting Some of us are born with it That's all we've got time for At this view So listen, tell us about yourself first of all.
24:52Right, so my name is Shane and I'm a wine educator based here at the WSCT School London. How long have you done that? And I have been teaching at the school for about seven years or so. Yeah. And so here I am at the forefront of providing the likes of you. Yes. with tailored, organised, hand-holding wine education.
25:19Alan Carr:Oh, okay. Just like the dinner ladies. So are you looking at, can you tell if we're going to be good students? Can you just tell? Well, I am in the business of not judging. So we welcome everybody at WSET School London. So from the novice, and hopefully we'll take you to a professional at some stage. Some people take longer than others, but then, you know, that's just the way it is. Yeah. So you've done this for seven years. What did you do before? Well, I've taught for longer than that, actually. But my affiliation with WSD School has been around that sort of time. Where are you from? Why do you want to know?
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25:55I don't know.
25:56Alan Carr:I'm just wondering. Have a few guesses. Kensington, Chelsea. Cheltenham. You sound like someone from Cheltenham. Windsor. I'm just down there from Camberwell, innit? in our main
26:15Alan Carr:my god okay what was your gateway wine what was your first wine that you went oh I love wine it really was Pinot Noir it really was Pinot Noir see I've really got into that this podcast has helped me get into it more super excellent well I brought one along today so we'll have an opportunity to seduce you further to really get you to understand it. That's my job here today. So what I do know about you is that you've been drinking a fair amount of wine. Some of it has been German. Yes. Well done for that. And that's one of my specialty areas. Well, I was chatting the other day about Dr. Luce and one of our favorites we had and the German wines in the vineyards over there.
26:58Alan Carr:Have you visited before? No. No. We should all go together, I reckon. Oh, I'd love that. That would be nice, wouldn't it? Yes. Renarge à Trois. WSET School London in Germany. Oh, ja, ja, ja. Das ist gut. Wunderbar. Wunderbar. Das ist gut. I've seen that you have been tasting some German wines, but you've mostly been in a little bit of a pigeonhole of Riesling. But I've brought some other things with me today. I'm going to take you on a journey with some red, with some sparkling. We really want to expand your horizons. We don't want you to be a little bit dull and boring like everybody else. No, no.
27:35Alan Carr:So WSET, anyone can come here and you believe they will come and leave this place knowing more than they came in. Even like if you're a wine specialist, you can still learn. Every day is a school day at WSET. Is that right? Absolutely. What did you do before wine then? I actually boringly worked as an economist. Can you imagine? Oh, dear. Gosh. One day you drink. I was in the corporate world, trudging along in a suit, in Bishop's Gate, hating every moment. Did you get the tube? Did you wear a suit and have trainers that you would then change into smart shoes? I always see. No, you know when you see people on the tube in a suit and they wear trainers?
28:18Alan Carr:I might be from here and ask the questions. We all want to know. What a stupid question. Because that's what they do. When you ride a bike, you have those clippy bits around.
28:33Alan Carr:What a stupid question. I apologise for my friendly. Can you... Who did you, though? It's unlikely. So what are we going to concentrate today on? Well, Alan, we are going to taste three examples of wine from Germany. Oh, yes. I never go for German wine when it's on the menu. Is that a great... Gretlina, is it? Gretlina? Gretlina? I think you might be in Austria, but we're going to be in Germany. I've travelled a lot. Well, we will have Riesling. We're going to have what the Germans call a Spätburgunder. And then another nice mouth-filling word called Lemberger. Lemberger. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fancy speaking German?
29:22Alan Carr:I used to sing, we used to sing a song in German. Hallo, wie heißt du? Ich heiße Gabi. Is that all you remember? No, but I felt people wanted me to... What's it? 99. What is it? Okay. Okay. Guten Tag, Gabi. I think, Shane, you're getting an idea of what we were like genuinely at school. Yeah, yeah. Miss, I've got a song. Short attention splash. Can you sometimes tell when people come into the WSET, can you think you're here to learn, like you're here to take it seriously? You can see the stars in their eyes. And which, have we got any in ours? Maybe. Oh my gosh. So I gather I have been keeping an eye on you from afar.
30:13And I have noticed that you have been, you know, sort of drifting along a river, picking up little bits. But I really now want to give you a sense of direction. Okay. And I'm going to give you a sense of direction the WSET way. and it has a name it's called the wset systematic approach to tasting wine could you say we've been
30:38Alan Carr:going west but we want to be going no you don't like that it's wset it is what it is sorry it is what it is okay now sorry no i think you're gonna get attention no you don't like that Sorry about this. So, yeah, so I've come prepared. I hope you've come prepared too. Yes, definitely. Are you eager? Eager. You want to be here? We're thirsty. Good. For knowledge and why. There we are. I'm going to give you what is called a tasting match. As educators, we can't make any assumptions. No. So we have to take it from ground zero and be as simple as possible. So these things, yeah? Yes, yes. Tasting match.
31:20Alan Carr:And for those of you listening, it's three circles with one, two, three. And it's all like the space where you put your wine. And do you remember when there used to be like a World Cup and you'd get like a tabloid and then it'd have the footprints on it where you'd get off with people and where you'd put your pint down? It's a bit like that. Right. That's a great example. Good. We all identified with that. All right, carry on. Any more songs, Lee? I do know one in French. No, no. Bonjour, monsieur. Bonjour, madame. Bonjour, mademoiselle. Short attention span. Awful, awful. So, we've got some glassware here.
31:59I know it's your podcast, but occasionally I might take over. You are taking over. I love it. So, I put that here, there. Yeah, so you do that. One, two, three. Great. Fantastic. Wonderful. What we're going to do now is we're going to teach you, or what I'm going to do is to teach you how to make notes about wine. that you can refer to at a later stage. This is what the systematic approach to tasting wine is about. And how you can then decide intrinsically whether or not the wine is of a good quality or not. That's what we want. So this is how we are bringing you into a more focused line of education.
32:36If you can cope. Oh, I can cope. I can cope. Bring it on, love. Super. Tasting that glassware and maybe something that's entirely foreign to you Yes. But you have travelled before, so, you know, you can deal with foreign ideas, can't you? Oh, yes. Voila. One for you. One for you.
32:56Alan Carr:Oh, is this a spittoon? It is a spittoon. Oh, no. We don't really believe in them. Well, you're in. Well, I'm in control now, so. What a waste of wine. Oh, God, you're one of those. Yes, I am one of those. Oh, gosh. This has really ruined my lesson. Well, I don't care. Can't. I don't care. Can't we be the spittoons? No. Please. No. Me, Peter, the human spittoon. Well, there's your tour. There's your tour name, sort of. That's your title. Human spittoon. Now, if you don't behave, I'll bring out my wine whip. Oh, don't threaten me with a good time. Barnable, barnable.
33:45Alan Carr:Right, go on. Are you ready? Are you ready? Having to hear us spit. Oh, gosh. Well, I mean, you know, sometimes you have to do things you don't want to do. I said that, yeah. Yes. But you'll survive. You'll survive. Yes. Okay, then. Come on, then. I think we should start off sparkling. Do you ever swallow? Well, do you know what? It depends on the occasion. Yes. Yes. Let's see where this journey takes us. Are you ready? I'm ready. Good. I've got a Schweepergunder. Sorry to hear that. She should get it checked. Haven't you got that? Haven't you got that on your foot? Flamptar fasciitis. Okay. You like slamming things down, don't you?
34:29Alan Carr:Why are you slamming? You've got a lot of energy. I like asserting my authority. You know, as an educator, you must command respect. Oh, and you did that very nicely. You opened that bottle with ease and sophistication. Do you know slams? I might know something, you know. Yeah. Go ahead. Because you know, slam, slam, slam, it's like him upstairs in the spare room. He's staying in these slam, Sam. Yes, when you have visitors, you know. Visitors. Infestation.
34:58So, I'm taking you down this very specific WSET journey of making observations in respect of our wine and then judging. I didn't tell you to do that. Thank you.
35:11Alan Carr:Sorry, sir. Okay. Give me lines. I haven't got my sample either. God. Is he like this with everything in the house? Everything. Oh, goodness me. Right. So, we've got some sparkling wine. And it is from the Mosel in Germany. It is a very cool part of the world. May I look at the label? Of course. Daniel Fries. Well, it's Fries, actually.
35:40Potato, potato. Fries. I'm sure he'll forgive you. Yes. I'm sorry. I'm sorry about that. Thinking of a caveman. This is usually a disruptor, but, you know. Anyway, so here we are. I'm going to look at the wine's color. Okay. So the way we're going to do this is hold it by the stem. This is where we have control. Yeah. And then what you're going to do is use this wonderful background, this neutral white background that you have. Yes? And we're going to just hold it there. And it may, to your naked eye, look like this wine perhaps has a golden colour, but it doesn't. This is how the WSCT's systematic approach to tasting wine is different.
36:25So this here is a lemon-coloured wine. Really? Really. Really? Yes. If I say that's what it is. Why is that? Because... It's not really a lemon, it's golden. Well, there are some specific things that you need to see. I can see a bit of yellow. You can see a bit of yellow. Okay. Well, I'll tell you the things that you, if you see them, what they equal. So, if you see orange, that's when the wine is gold. And in the absence of gold, it's by default lemon. Oh, God. I feel like such a... Formalised education. Yeah. You have to accept it for what it is. Yeah, when wine gives you lemons. Yeah. Yeah.
37:10Take them. Take them. Suck on them.
37:15Alan Carr:So that means that the wine is fairly youthful. Yeah? So basically what you're saying is if we don't see orange, which we don't by default, it is lemon. It's lemon. Yeah. And then sometimes you might see a little green, but that's rare. So most of your wines are going to be lemon, and that's what we have here. Okay. So we know that's a youthful wine. Yes. Young, and that should be young, full of vibrant, and quite like a party in your mouth. It should be fun. But remember here, this is not about fun. This is work. This is not fun. It can be fun, but it's work, really. This is work, yeah. They're too carried away, because if you get carried away, your emotions impact your observations.
37:58Oh, is that true?
37:59Alan Carr:No. So you get too emotional. You have to be quite like... Focus. You're a bit like philosophy, T. as well as wine. No, no, it's just the way it is. This is our approach. You're very, you're very, you think a lot and you're one of the life's thinkers. Have you got like in your kitchen, live, life, love? Have you got things like that? I might be from Camberwell, but really. Because he's got, he's got, drink, drink, drink. Somehow I can believe it.
38:35Alan Carr:Can we try it? Yes. I'm desperate. I know. Can we just have a separate glass? Have you been diagnosed as yet? With many things. Right. Okay. Let's do this. Remember, it's systematic. So before we put it in our mouth, we have to bring it to the nose. So let's give it a little swirl. I know you've done this before. Yes. So give it a little swirl. Yeah. And there's no need to be dramatic. I know the two of you can get a little excited sometimes. What about those people who do this? Yes, the wide circle. Is that too much? They just don't have the technique down as yet. Yes, some of us. That's quite good, yeah.
39:12Alan Carr:Sometimes you, you know, finger it a little bit more sensitively. Well, I don't think our fingers are doing anything interesting here at this moment. No. Yeah. Wait till after school. But just swirling. We're just going to part of the bike sheds. So give it a swirl in the glass. You've done that before. And bring it to your nose. Not your mouth, your nose. No, okay, sorry. I've got a drooping out of it. He always gets those two confused. Bring it to your nose. Did you know this? This is what we say on the bottoms up. The nose is the cathedral of the face. Wow. Okay. So if you know what that means, please let us know.
39:50Alan Carr:Ah, okay. Right. I'll get back to you. Yeah. Get that inscribed in Latin. What does that mean? So I'm smelling that. So it's definitely champagne. It smells like champagne. Well, we are not in France. We are in Deutschland. We're in Germany here, wine-wise. And so we're just giving it a little smell. And it's really, it smells of summertime. Summertime when the living is easy. Right. Okay, back to the wine. So things like strawberries, raspberries, a little... See, I struggle to get... You know when people... I just don't know if I've got a good... This is all down to memory. And do you know what?
40:34The more you use this approach, the better you'll become. So it's all down to the technique. The more you use the technique. I'm getting leather. Leather. Would you get leather? I'm getting leather.
40:44Alan Carr:Well, we're not getting leathered. No, what's taking you there? But let me bring you back. I knew you were a little bit wayward, so let's bring you back to where you need to. Yeah. Yeah. So when I say these things, just say yes. Okay? So strawberries. Yes. Raspberries? Yeah. Shortbread? No. You've got to say yes. You've got to say yes. Get his whip out. Oh, shortbread. Yes. Don't get that. Okay. You're supposed to say yes. I do, Shane. I know who's going to do well in this exam. This, you know, it's obvious. Jammy Dodger. Oh, gosh. Some people may need to come back. But overall, nice, bright. Yeah.
41:30Fresh berries. I'd have a picnic and I'd have this. Yes. I'll join you. We can leave other people behind. Yes, please do. So let's go to the palate. Yes. Let's go to the palate. And I can see that you haven't done this before. This sort of swishing around. Oh, yes.
41:50Alan Carr:That's where you swirl it. Because normally you just knock it down. Knock it down. Yeah. But here, what we're trying to do is expose the wine to all parts of the palate. such that we can understand what we have in our mouth. Oh, like Listerine. Well, yes, if that's an easy thing for you to identify with, yeah, a bit like that. But how about I demonstrate it first and then you follow me? Yes, of course, please. Okay, here we go.
42:17Alan Carr:So, you are swirling, you're shushing it around your mouth. Mm-hmm. For the purpose of the listeners, you can... Ooh, and then...
42:28Alan Carr:And he's just... That's the police have just arrived. To arrest him for these obscene noises in a public space. What you will notice is this explosion. Yeah, explosion. Explosion, yeah. Explosion of everything. Everything comes alive. Yeah. Okay. So, have a go. And we're using the spittoon, do you want us to? Yes, you are. Yeah. We don't have to if you don't want us to. Oh, I do want you to. Are you sure? The teacher says use the spittoon. This is our etiquette, and you're here at the school. So we should. So we are following the etiquette. Good. There you go. Oh, wow, I like that sound. Confident.
43:09Wow. Really impressed. And what you're going to do is stop and then whistle. Pretend as if you're going to whistle backwards. Yeah, okay. Be as normal as you can. and then spit it out. Oh, shit.
43:29Alan Carr:I've just spat it onto my own hand. You're on a journey. You're on a journey. You're on a journey. So, well done. Thank you. I think that was really, really well done. Yeah, well done. I tell you what, though, I am getting... Yeah. So what you'll notice is... There's like a sourness to it. Yeah, so that is the acidity in the wine. Yes. So your mouth flooded with water. Yeah. And then invariably, some of that saliva slipped down. Yes, it did. So you never, ever get rid of all of it. Some of it does slip down. So with that acidic thing, Ed, what does that tell you about the wine? It tells you that you probably want to have a few glasses of that.
44:10It makes the wine seem fresh and lively and vibrant.
44:13Alan Carr:Yeah, it does. It does, doesn't it? Yeah, good. Excellent. And where can you buy this for people at home? It's called Daniel Fries. He's Daniel Fries. Fine, good, good wine. Yeah, so this is from the Mosel. What's Mosel? Mosel is a wine region, one of Germany's 13 wine regions. And you can buy this at various retailers online, around£30 or something like that. But using our unique, systematic approach to tasting wine, this would come out as very good. So I think a good start. I wanted to give you a good start. That's lovely, yeah. Did you like that? I really liked it. Cool. I feel like you need a red.
44:49Shall we go red? Definitely. And this is a German red. This is a German red. I don't know if I've had a German red. Have you ever had a red wine from Germany? Well, it's the first time for everything. Yes. Good. Now, the only thing that's really going to change now is that we're going to pay attention to tannin. And tannin does the opposite of acidity. Tannin will take all of that moisture away. Good? Yeah, yeah. So, let me guide you through this. I'm going to pour you some. Okay, lovely. This is our Lamberger. You've probably never heard of it before. No, no. You have Austrian connections, don't you, Lee?
45:24So in Austria, this is called Blaufränkisch, but we're going to come back to the German word. And this here comes from a German region you've probably never heard of before called Wittenberg. No, Wittenberg. So this is one of those obscure regions known for this particular grapefruit. I didn't give myself any.
45:44Alan Carr:And out of interest, for accessibility purposes, what wine would you say this is close to? It would be close to, if we're going to go a bit more mainstream, something like Syrah. Have you heard of that? Oh, yeah, I like Syrah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They call it Shiraz in Australia. They're always different. But anyway, perhaps similar to Syrah. Yes, Syrah. Right. And that's always a bit spicy, isn't it, Syrah? Yes. So that's something to look out for in this wine. A little bit of spice, and it's common to use some oak maturation. So look out for some woodiness. Good. Are we ready? Yeah, so we look for the colour first.
46:21So we're going to look for the colour. And so we're going to do the same thing. And here, it's a ruby colour. Yes. You're right there, love. Does it look nice and red to you there, Lee? Yeah, and that's what I'd want from a rat. That's what you want, yeah. Okay. Yeah. Okay, let's go to the nose. So we're going to this nice, exciting...
46:41Alan Carr:Oh, I love the smell of this. It's beautiful, isn't it? I love red. I love red. You know, I love red. Wonderful violet notes. So one of the things you've, hopefully you've noticed, is that German wine. I'm getting violet. Are you getting violet? German wines can be quite aromatic in here. Quite spicy. And very spicy. White pepper, black pepper, a whole wonderful ripe basket of black fruit. It's like a spice market, isn't it? It's like a bazaar. It's like being abroad. Oh, gosh. Gosh, you're a natural. I know. You're a natural. I'm getting candy, isn't it? I'm not going to spit this. You're not going to spit this.
47:20Because I've been spitting and it's been going down my top. Oh, gosh. Well, let's go. I can't, I can't kill you for that. But you'll try.
47:38I got it down me as well.
47:43Alan Carr:Oh, well, calm as a bitch, isn't it, Shane?
47:50Alan Carr:Well, you know, unruly students. Unruly students. Would you like your pupils normally talk to the teacher like that? Feel like calm as a bitch. Feel like you've gone from dominant to a little bit submissive, Shane. Oh, God. Right, anyway, so let's go back to our little framework for quality. Yes. Nicely balanced. Lovely and balanced. The tannins are there. There's a little alcohol. I would say he's better than the first one. Yeah, and you are spot on. Yes. Spot on. Well, dandy. It's those noises that you do. You kind of do it quite sophisticated. Hmm. That was better. Yeah. yummy stuff isn't it yummy we shouldn't say that normally but when it's good it's good and here it's more than good we call it outstanding yeah you don't say yummy and this is outstanding it's like i don't like you think yummy in your head but you say outstanding i don't think i would because do you know what an ick for me is when adults say tummy ah and yummy yummy is that what an association no but if a man says to me oh it's yummy in my tummy i'd be like who says that When was the last time you heard a grown person say, I've got your man in mind on me?
49:15Alan Carr:Who has ever said that? All the time. He talks in his sleep.
49:24I mean, you are staying free of charge, you know. Yes. I shouldn't wade in there, should I? Now, shall we return to our matter at hand? Are you ready to be examined?
49:38wine-wise. Yes.
49:40Alan Carr:Yes. Please. For those listening, Lee's just putting his clothes back on.
49:54So, we've been to the Mosel, we've been to Wirtemberg, and now we're going to go to the Falz. The Falz. And we are bringing out a very, well, Germany's signature grape variety. Screw top shape. Yes. Schlegelflascher. So this is a very traditional wine bottle shape.
50:21Alan Carr:Schlegelflascher. So seeing the shape of this bottle, immediately we know it's going to be Riesling. Why? because this is the shape that is traditional for the grape variety. So Riesling generally have a shape like this. Usually. Exactly. Usually in this bottle. A little bit thinner, longer. Yes, so we call it slim and fluted. Yes, indeed. What's the name of the wolf? What's it, Doctor? Dr. Berklin. So this is Dr. Berklin-Wolf, and this is from the Pfalz, and the Pfalz is in the southern part of Germany. And I'm going to use this wine to examine you to see where, whether or not you've picked up on some of the elements that we've spoken about, things like acidity, etc., etc.
51:04Following your progress, I know that you've been talking about things like acidity and body, etc., length. So I'm going to ask you three questions. Yeah? Pour the wine. Okay. All right. So here we are. So you're pouring a lovely Riesling. Yeah, so it's a Riesling. Well done, not Riesling. I know, I always got a little bit confused over that.
51:30Alan Carr:But do you drink Riesling? I'll have a Riesling now and then, yeah. Okay. But I wouldn't probably pick it necessarily. Right. Well, hopefully this experience will change your mind. Yes. Yeah? Good. You're quite terrifying. Am I? I promise you I'm fine. He doesn't care about anything I say. I have a job to do No, you're good You're very good I'm outstanding You know what you're doing We're taking Mickey a little bit You are outstanding And you have a very unique Systematic approach to wine Well It's trademarked By the WSCT Remember that Okay So Here we are So let's go here And What I want Well, you have to wait For my direction So three questions The first is I want you to, let's go taste, because you like tasting.
52:26I want you to taste the wine. So let's base it all on tasting. Come on. So let's taste it. Okay. Spin it round like that. Yeah. Am I looking for lemon? I see a bit of green. Well, the only thing you're looking to do here is to taste. Just bring it to your mouth. So we're skipping some steps. Okay. Yeah.
52:53so i want you to tell me
52:59one by one what is the acidity in this wine what is the level of acidity less than the first one i would say can you give me a level can you give me something specific could you give me a Shall I give you options? Yeah. Yeah. Low, medium, high? I'd say low. Low. Low, medium, or high? I think it's medium. Okay. I'm getting a lot of still there. Yeah, okay. So zero all around. It's high.
53:31Alan Carr:So you get nothing. You get nothing. It's high. Zero all around. Where'd... Shane, I'm not being funny, but two against one. It's zero all around. Two against one. Two against one. Zero all around. I'm getting pretty much low acidity. Okay. Shane, I know you're the teacher, but is there a head teacher? Is there someone above you that I can maybe have a word with? I'm afraid that person is away at the moment. Yes. Yeah, do you have like Ofsted for wine? Oh. I saw him watching one of those things outside on the gate. This is very good at wine. Really? Low acidity? It's high acidity. Right, let's go again.
54:17So let's go to question two. Let's taste it again. Let's taste it again.
54:26Gosh, your technique is really, really stellar. I know, sorry. Yeah, you're good. I'm good, I'm good. Yeah, yeah. Stellar. So, next question. Now wait, I'm going to give you the options as before. What is the body of this wine? Your options are light, medium, or full light. Light. Yes. Zero all around. It's medium. Gosh, you're not as good as I had hoped. Let's have one more step. It feels light. It feels light. It's got a little weight there. It doesn't quite have the consistency of water. It's not like, you know.
55:05Alan Carr:No, but I wouldn't have. If you'd have said that, I would have said medium. Well, following your progress, you've already had that little bit sort of drilled in you, but maybe you've forgotten. What time did you get home this morning?
55:24Don't answer. I can't actually answer. Right, let's hope somebody wins this. Okay. Okay, right. This is down to the wiring. Otherwise, we're going to have to go to a fourth question. Tiebreaker. Let's taste again. Okay. I love a tiebreaker.
55:46Right. Impressive. Slurping. Gosh. I saw that. You drank it. But that's all right. I'll turn a blind eye. You pretended. I saw that. Yeah.
55:59Alan Carr:Have you been pretending to spit?
56:05Alan Carr:It's for two centi. I thought, I didn't wonder. I was like, I used to get a spit. So what is the quality of this wine? I'll give you three options. Usually there are four, but I'll give you three options. Is it good? Is it very good? Or is it outstanding? I would say... I think it's good. I just think it's good. I'm going to say outstanding. We have a winner. the quality of Björklin Wolf Riesling Hocken from Fels in Germany is Allen yeah I told you it was good it was not outstanding well done there you go thank you for that well I hope you have learned something I've learned so much thank you Shane it's been my pleasure I know we've been a bit silly but this is it's been fun and I know a lot of people who have come to the WSET and they say you know it's brilliant and if you're real if you have like a real passion for it whether or not you just want to kind of take that extra step and learn a little bit more about it which is what we're trying to do on this podcast or whether you want to go further exactly are you a bit like you know teachers at school where you go into the staff room at break and you slag off all the other students naturally naturally what are you going to say about us
57:28Alan Carr:so my microphone on yes make sure I don't have a hot wire mic when I leave shall we go and put our spittoons in our lockers
57:41thank you Shane it's been my pleasure thank you so much and I look forward to following your journey
57:46Alan Carr:if you've enjoyed this episode of Bottoms Up don't forget to join us on socials at Bottoms Up Show and if you want bonus bits then don't forget to hit follow on Spotify, Apple and YouTube or wherever you get your podcasts. And as always, we want to hear from you. Send in your questions and your dilemmas to bottomsup at listen.co.uk or DM us at bottomsupshow on socials. Bottoms Up with Alan Carr and Lee Peard is our platform media production. Bottoms Up. All free. We're triple parked. Oh, get that down your shape. Thank you.
From the publisher
This week on Bottoms Up! Alan Carr and Lee Peart head to Wine School at the WSET London, where they're put to the test by a Master of Wine to find out whether they've actually learned anything so far...
Elsewhere, Lee's still living with Alan, and they're still fighting over the recycling. Lee's also been using Alan's posh candles, while some late-night smoke alarm drama has left them both exhausted.
With the boys back at school, the pair reminisce about their own school days – from Alan befriending the dinner ladies, Lee getting a bit too familiar with his teachers and both revealing their first crushes.
Then, wine expert and teacher Shane Jones shows the boys how to taste wine properly, including the all-important slurping technique, before introducing them to something they've never encountered before... a spittoon.
Drink responsibly, and as always… Bottoms Up!
Bottoms Up! With Alan Carr and Lee Peart is a Platform Media production.
Get in touch with the show: bottomsup@listen.co.uk
Follow us on Instagram: @BottomsUpShow
Chapters:
00:00 – Coming Up
00:30 – Alan's Smoke Alarm Nightmare
05:32 – Alan & Lee on Albert Square?
08:02 – Back to School Time
21:45 – The Boys Meet a Spittoon
47:25 - Lee vs Alan - Who'll Be Top of the Wine Class?
Psst. In case Alan and Lee's slurping and backchat doesn't make it clear... this episode does not reflect what an actual WSET course is like!
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