The X-Rated Bottoms Up! Mix-Up

17:29Alan Carr:Do you know what you need to do? Drizzle some lemon. No, don't ruin my sandwich. Inish lemon! No, I don't want lemon. You have lemon with fish. What are you? Don't! Why have you soaked it in lemon? You are trying to sabotage me. Everyone has fish with lemon. Yes. And shall I have a bit of curry sauce? No! Okay. Ah, come on. No, I take this seriously. You've gone too far. You've gone too far. Do you want the book list to win? I'm going to cut into that there. Oh my God, I can hear the crunch. Here we go. Well, I think I'm going to eat one half of mine now. No, you have mine. One half. Yeah. And then you have one half of mine.

18:08Alan Carr:Now, curry sauce and mushy peas with a bit of gherkin. Okay, here we go. Let's taste this. Mmm. That's really nice! Yes, and you've got the crunch there, but you've got double crunch with the shallots as well. Mmm, I love the shallots. Mmm. Can you taste the curry sauce? I have to say, yours is delicious. I wasn't expecting it to be. Well. But actually, and I love the addition of the gherkins. Well, do you know what? We need someone impartial to judge. Mmm. Do we have a judge here? Someone who can taste it? You had me with the gherkins. I'm sorry, it's Alan. No, I will have to say, either way, I'm a massive fan of crunch.

18:51And I think the bird's eye just adds that, but elevate it. So if you are looking to elevate your sandwich, try bird's eye. Best ever. Fish fingers. Bottoms up. Aww.

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20:38Alan Carr:Our next guest has come back. Hurrah! And boy, do we need her. She really knows her grapes from her guesswork. It's Alicia Hansel. Thank you. Thank you. Alicia, I can't remember whether I said this last time, but Alicia Hansel, a great name. Is it? Do you think so? I always think, like, of the X Factor. Alicia Hansel. You know? Oh, my ruddy God. I'm going to... It's Alicia Hanson. Oh, say Rachel Adedage. Rachel Adedage. Yes. I am going to record that on my phone and have that as my ringing tone. Alicia, answer the phone. I like it because it's an A, so it means I'm at the beginning of things. But I always didn't know if it was a bit like meh.

21:24But thanks.

21:25Alan Carr:Alicia's not meh. Alan is. Alan, what a boring name. But you're awesome at the beginning of the, you know, register. I thought you were going to say awesome. But you're awesome. I was like, oh, so at the beginning. What would you want to be called if you weren't called Alicia? Have you ever thought? Okay, so you remember when we were a bit younger and we used to be on like chat rooms when we were teenagers and we shouldn't have been. Yeah. Talking to, you know, grown men that our parents didn't know about. No. I was expecting the story to go so dark so quick. I was expecting Mary, Joan, Jill. I always use the name Roxanne on that.

22:10Oh. Because I thought it was quite a sexy name. Yeah, it is sexy.

22:15Alan Carr:Roxanne. Roxanne. When it was like ASL. No, not ASL. ASL, age, sex, location. Yes. No, sex as in... So if someone said ASL to you, right, with Alan, you'd say 49M male and location. Sex, please. That's what the old men wanted you to say. Alicia, this is... Sorry.

22:43You have plied me with wine before.

22:45Alan Carr:Yeah, thank you, Roxanne. Roxanne, can we have Alicia back, please?

22:53Alan Carr:mild mannered Alicia by day cheer at Roxanne by night I could see that your alter ego thank you although I'm currently you know I'm back with a new fringe and something new to tell you so I do feel like I'm channeling my inner Rick James more than Roxanne so so we've got Alicia we've got Roxy we've got Rick you do just look a little it does Yes, yes. And as Rick Jones would say, give it to me baby. Jackson! Oh no, it's not the bottoms up the musical. I will say it is rosé season. And I am very pleased to see three bottles of, I will say, different shades of rosé. So what are we doing today? What are you going to teach us?

23:42So I know you love a paille provance. So I'm going to start you off with one of these and then I'm going to move you over to rosés that hopefully you'll like, but just so you can learn a little bit and venture out in time. First question, is a pale Provence like that essentially white dressed up as rosé? Is it like a gay white wine? That's for you to say, not me. Yeah, let's get it cancelled.

24:15So there are kind of three main ways that rosé can be made. So the main way is called maceration. And that's when the juice of any grape is always clear and you get the colour from the skin. I might have told you this also. I think I remember this. So to get a rosé, you just leave the juice in contact with the skin for 12 hours to 24 hours, depending on how deep you want it. So that's maceration. Then we've got one called sagni, which is a fancy French word for bleeding. and basically that's when they're making a red wine but then they bleed off a little bit in order to keep that red wine to make that red wine more concentrated and then the stuff they've bled off then they can use as a rose oh so like the remnants remnants so that one's not always that one's not always as good of a quality then you get blended a bit like you've got like cuts of meat you've got like exactly yeah and and you know they wouldn't have even used it but since the popularity of rosé has become so big now it's like a oh we're two for one yeah exactly a bog off yeah so is that wet method maybe a little bit cheaper and a little bit exactly yeah because

25:21Alan Carr:the thing with me and you're the same sometimes when we go to a restaurant and order a drink or a bar or something i won't ask what the price or where it's from i'll say oh can i have a look at the color of it yeah because i am driven by that oh someone's in the naughty corner someone's gonna and get a spanking from Roxanne anymore. Roxanne, I've been so bad recently.

25:45I should never have mentioned that story. So that's bad. Yeah, it's not bad. It's just not the best. And then we've got blending, which is literally red wine and white wine put together. That is illegal anywhere in the EU. Illegal? Illegal anywhere in the EU. What the fuck are they? Don't, don't. People used to do that at uni. They would just pour in a white and a red. Oh, delightful. Isn't that a sangria? Isn't sangria red and white wine? No, I don't think so. It's like red wine and like soda and stuff. Oh, that's why I'm getting mistaken. Sorry, love. So it's illegal anywhere apart from champagne and in what we call the new world.

26:23So like Australia or American cities like that. Yeah, we've learned about that. Yeah, I know. So. So. Let's start with the one. I'm guessing that this one isn't sangria, is it? No, this is a beautiful rosé from a winery that I absolutely love called Mirabeau. And I love them because they do such amazing things when it comes to environmental causes. And they're all involved in like regenerative viticulture. And I always think, I know it's a little boring and a little whatever, but I just think we drink wine in such like, you know, a place of happiness that it shouldn't, the making of it shouldn't cause anyone sadness.

27:01Do you know what I mean? Yes, that's true. So I always want wine to have a... What, the story or the wine? Both. I'd switch stuff to be honest. Yeah. I'm joking. I'm joking. So this is delicious. How retailing do we know? It's£16. Just clarifying here, the skin of this, the skin of the grapes, probably not that much contact. Exactly. And how long then are we saying? Like 12 hours maybe? Oh really, that quick? Yeah, maybe 24 at tops, just enough to pull some of the phenolics, so the colour and the flavours and a little bit of the texture, but keeping that fresh acidity that you know and love in a rosé.

27:44Alan Carr:Would you say there's like wine can be in fashion and stuff? Because obviously like the sun's come out, you see people there, I'm gagging for a rosé, this is the time. Is there any, is there trends at the minute with wine and rosé? What's happening? You might be surprised actually that obviously rosé in summer is a thing, but Christmas is the second biggest spike in rosé consumption. Everyone is drinking rosé at Christmas now. I never have said it at Christmas, never. Because honestly, rosé is the best, like if you don't know what to pair with food wine. If you've got no idea, go for a rosé. Really?

28:19Yeah, really safe. Because it's got like a little bit of the structure and fruit of a red, but the acidity and freshness of white, it works with so much food. Do you know what? I'm thinking about it now. and if I was eating and I didn't want a red but sometimes I don't want to what I suppose that is

28:34Alan Carr:a bit rosé is a bit of a meat in the middle isn't it but are there any supermarkets or anything at the minute you know with summer season where would you head to to get your wine is that where would you get the best bargains from because we all like a bit of like the best bargains um do you know what I love the the discounters are doing great things Aldi and Lidl do do good things you have to kind of be a little bit savvy and know what to look for but they're always really good and i do love a waitrose i think they're always consistently good what about tesco wines are they good tesco they're such a like you know monster they have so much power they can bring in so many good bargains because just because of um economies of scale they are excellent actually we do i we do um tastings every autumn winter and spring and summer and tesco's is always the biggest so we're tasting like 150 wines in one go.

29:26Wow. And that's like not even their whole catalogue. Yeah. So go on, this is lovely, but we knew we'd like this. We knew, I just wanted this as a... But this is the thing about colour. We know, you're at a restaurant, you've said this, but you're at a restaurant, he shows me this, he shows me, so Mirabeau, and he shows me a chapel down, which is slightly darker. I know, safe option, I'm going to like the Mirabeau. Yeah. But what if this is nicer? Don't be a hater. No, I'm not a hater. He's like, I don't see colour. Yeah, exactly. I'm not. Okay, so we've gone from a Cote de Provence. Yes, so this is Corsican.

30:10So I wanted to show you like a cool French cousin. That is how I feel about Corsican rosé. I love Corsican rosé. You know, they've got a very mixed history. They've got a bit of French, a bit Italian. They're in an island. The grapes they use represent just the vibe, I feel, about the island, which is like a little bit spicy, a little bit saucy. Oh, right. So you should... I've not been to Corsica. Nor have I, actually. I just feel like that's how it would be.

30:39Alan Carr:Sorry. Just out, did you? No, maybe Roxanne went.

30:48This is a wine Roxanne would drink. I also want to try this, but I'm just going to bear with me. Oh, right, yes. Okay, so you're finishing. We don't do spittoons here. There were no spittoons here. Okay. So why did you just neck that? Because that was the Provence. Oh, okay. Now I thought I was left out. You'd already drunk yours. I know, I put a one to the neck. You can do it and I'll re-pour you. Go on. Down it, down it. Hey!

31:20Alan Carr:Oh, that's nice. Oh, yay! That is nice. Very good. Oh, God. But... I can't do this. Right, go on. So, what's it called? Isla Mir. So, it's from the Isle of Buttes. So, they call it the beautiful Isle. It's about Corsica. And I love it because it's got one indigenous grape, which is Shakarulo. Shakarulo, I think it's pronounced. And Syrah. And both of them are very... They give spice and a little bit of texture. And I wanted to show you, because I don't think you would have chosen this colour, which is darker than... Don't like the label, don't like the colour, don't like that thing on the bottle.

32:00It wouldn't have even reached my periphery. Okay, give it a taste and tell me if it reaches your palate. Are you all right?

32:10Alan Carr:Simon Cowell. I don't like the label, don't like the font, don't like the colour. It's a no from me. Do you have anything else? No. Give it a smell first though. I want you to see if you can smell that spiciness and aromatics I was speaking of. In comparison to the Mirabeau, which is lovely, but it's a little more restrained. Yes. This is slightly more spice. Yeah. No, no. Well, tell me some flavours you're getting. No, no. Okay. It's that, that for me, like you said, restrained, that doesn't really have a smell. This, I'm trying to work out what the smell is. It's different, but not in a nasty way.

32:46Alan Carr:Do you think that I'm getting, I've never really smelled anything like this. Yeah, I can get spiciness from it. There's something there that's sort of tickling the nose. Yeah, perfect. That's the indigenous grape. And Syrah is also known for like red fruits and black pepper. So I just think this is, what do you think? It's not too fruity. That's so nice. It's the spiciness. But I think a lot of the time what people want in a Provence or what they're looking for that they love in a Provence is like the freshness, right? It's the acidity. And I do think even though this has got a little bit more texture and a little bit more flavour and spice, it still does have that acidity coming through.

33:26Do you know what? I don't like it. Fair enough. I love it. Oh! You got me! You got me! You really did. That was another Simon Cowell thing, didn't he? Did you do that? Yes. Yes. No, okay. I do like it. what I don't like is, and I think you taught us this, about the lightness and the texture in your mouth. It's slightly heavier than the pale. Yes. And I think with a rosé, I quite like that feeling of, like, almost like I'm drinking water. Yeah. That is what we call in the trade... Alkalism. A poolside wine. A poolside wine. Yeah, that's what we call it. So you don't have to think about it. You just have to drink it.

34:06And I like those too, but sometimes you want something... You know, if you were eating... I was going to say, with a meal, this might be a little bit nicer. That's, you know, when you're sat by the pool in Corsica. Exactly. You'll get there.

34:21Alan Carr:A girl can dream.

34:26Alan Carr:And is that quite, Corsican wine is like that a lot? Yes. Is it quite respected, Corsican? It's very unknown. I would say in the wine trade, yes, people love it, but it's very unknown. But this is very typical for a Corsican rosé. I, it's one of my absolute go-tos and it always surprises people if they come around my house and they're like, ooh, and then they drink it and they have the same reaction. Because when people write dilemmas in, a lot of people want to bring a wine to a party that maybe is a little bit left field. So that would be great because people are like, this is a Corsican one that I love.

34:55Alan Carr:You'd be like that, wow. So how much is this then? £8.50. Oh. I know. It is value central in Corsica, honestly. And I do think that is an important thing to maybe say because I'm going to be honest here. if I saw a bottle of wine for£8.50, that might put me off. Oh, would it? Yeah, because I would just assume that the cheaper would not be as nice. And I think that's just something in my head. Whereas actually I've tasted that and it's delicious and I need to probably be a little bit less snobby about that. I have to say you are the first person I've ever come across with that viewpoint. I'm sure others do share it, but that's so interesting.

35:33Who doesn't want cheap wine? No, well, yes, I don't, because I sometimes equate cheap wine to bad hangovers. Yeah. And that's what I think is my worry. Okay, interesting. But then we talk about Whispering Angel, 20 pound a bottle, and I've had some stonking hangovers. Splitting a day. All right, so finish up your glasses.

35:55Alan Carr:Yes, go on then.

36:00You're making that grimacing face that you said they didn't do in the films. yes you just don't yes

36:11Alan Carr:yes have you two had some sort of weird fucking thing without me excuse me language please family podcast we're not on Keith and Darren's bottoms up now because you two are all little mean girly over here maybe it's the rose crack open the next one and get this over with I am never coming back sorry that was Roxanne

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37:53Right, come on then, chapel down. Now, chapel down. I will say it. Kent said Kent. Well done, well done. I said Kent. Well done. So, Chapel Down. Yes. I didn't know had a rosé because I like their fizz. Yeah, their fizz is great, isn't it? Well, basically every English wine producer now does rosé, I would say, because it's so popular. And some even do red wine. Oh, the colour, the colour, the colour, the colour. it's given me a visceral response in my body i've told you not to judge before i know i know i know but this is what we're learning i know so the thing is the reason i've showed you this a yes because of the color but also we've got to think about where things are grown so this is english we are cool climate and what does cool climate give us in a wine it gives us freshness yay Yay, acidity.

38:49I guessed that, I guessed that. Perfect, acidity. And what did we say that we liked from the Provence and the Corsican? The colour. The rose, the acidity, yay!

38:59Alan Carr:The acidity. God, why has it turned into a riddle?

39:07Alan Carr:Al and Alicia and Lee have three glasses of wine. Three bottles of rose. They neck them all. How many did they have? Another three. So go on. So even though the colour is dark, I'm hoping that you'll see that the acidity, because of the cool climate, is still there, which will hopefully mean that you'll like it still. Okay. All right. And to be honest, I will say, I am being a bit judgy on that, but comparatively, if I got served this, I would still think this was a pale rose thing. In the glass, it's not as dark, is it, as in the bottle? No, but compared to that, yeah. Yeah, all right. Give it a smell.

39:42Alan Carr:And is it like Kent as well, because the chalky thing, yes. You've done so well. I know, I know. White Cliffs of Dover. It was so good with the chalky thing. That was so good. So basically, the chalky thing. The chalky thing. So just to remind you. So the White Cliffs of Dover, obviously they are chalk, and that is the same soil as in the north of France. So yeah, very good south of England. I mean, you've got that Birmingham Trang, which we've talked about. Do you reckon Birmingham will ever have its own wine? They do, babes. And actually, there is one I remember that I have had wines from and I've loved before called Half Penny Green.

40:16But they even go all the way up, like Yorkshire, which is a really good sparkling they've had from there, and then even one in Scotland. But the wine is not drinkable from there yet. Do you think, you know, we talked about climate change, do you think eventually maybe it's better? Yeah, absolutely. Do you think Mr Carr at his castle could have a little vineyard? Oh, you could, actually. You know, Scandinavia makes wine. So, you know, if you look about the latitude, longitude, yeah, latitude. Latitude, yeah, yeah. I'm sure that's about Scotland-y, isn't it?

40:46Alan Carr:Oh, my God. anything like a Birmingham vineyard and all that. Let me be your vineyard consultant for your vineyard. Well, I don't have a vineyard, but you can come and consult. Plant it and I'll consult for you. Yeah. Which will just be me drinking lots of wine saying plant it. You've got to come to my castle. I would love to. You've got to come to my castle, please. I would love to. You're more than welcome. Do you know what? Do you want to get married? Not to me, but are you getting married? Do you know, I am already married, but for various reasons, it had to be very small. So it was just me and my husband and two witnesses, and we did want a big party, but we couldn't.

41:17And we always said we'd do an anniversary party. How long have you been married? That's a really good question. Well, let us know when you know. You know when I remember that? Only like four years or something. But come and get married at my castle. For my fifth year anniversary. I actually would love that. Oh my God, you're more than one. Because my parents didn't see me getting married or his parents didn't. Really? No, like no one. It was just like... Were they annoyed of that? No, actually. Well, do you know who was the most, out of both of our parents? My dad was the most upset. My mum was like, about time.

41:51His parents did it, but my dad was the one that was most upset. But you know what? I think, and I don't want to speak for your dad, but I know him very well. You hanging around with big black men, just randomly.

42:09Um... Yes.

42:13No, but I wonder whether sometimes fathers... Are you the only daughter? I am the only child. He's probably thought, I can't wait for the day that I give my daughter away to someone. So maybe renewing your vows, you can include him in that. Although we're not part of that patriarchy, so he's not giving me away. No, no, okay.

42:32Alan Carr:You're having a mare with this conversation, Lee, I'll tell you. God. I wish I was talking to Roxanne. She's a bit poor. I miss her. Now listen, come on. Focus. First, Chapel Dam. Yes. What are we thinking about this? We've had a taste of it. The smell of it is the most, I don't want to say pungent, but it's the most aromatic. Aromatic. Excellent. Aromatic, intense, pungent, even, perfect. So that is because of the grapes we're using. So this is Pinot Noir and Pinot Mernier, which obviously a famous red wine. So it gives you that very red berry, a little bit of spice too. so you're feeling the fruitiness but there should be some acidity there too this is nice and are you being serious you like it and you know what i saw i saw the i saw the color and i saw english rose ken and i thought please be nice please be nice because you know we ought to be patriotic here and like come on you know and but it is i would have that i would have that that's such a good choice wouldn't you i like it i really do i do think it is on the cusp I will say.

43:35It's 100 % it's the fruitiest that we've had out of the fruit. Yeah, it's on the cusp for me and it's just there, but yeah, really nice. But I do love Chapel Down as a brand app, I always loved their ones. I'm so glad. Again, when we're talking about food, this one again will take it up a notch and we'll be able to go with like even barbecued. How much does this retail at, the Chapel Down? £16. Yeah. So it's about the same, well just a little bit more than the Provence. Yeah, okay. But you've got to remember, we've got less land in England, It costs more for labour. So that's why English wines always tend to be a bit more expensive.

44:08Alan Carr:If you want to be a little bit patriotic than that, that'd be nice for St George's Day. Mirabeau, classic. Chapel Down, patriotic. Isula Mia, horny. Yeah. Yeah. Sounds good. Well, on that note, bottoms up.

44:31Well, thank you, Alicia. And before you go, you're not just a wine expert. You are. I'm a fragrance founder. A fragrance founder. I love that. I'm holding your candles in my hand right now. And I will say, it says on it, Evokin' Côte de Provence. We've got pink grapefruit, sea salt and white moss. Now, they're not like Gwyneth Paltrow's candle, is it? Not quite, no. So it's all about...

44:57Alan Carr:I don't want to smell goop. It's all about evoking the landscape and the culture of a region. And the region obviously happens to be wine regions in this case. Sounds nice. Thank you. So we've got, you know, the pink grapefruit and the pink fruits for the rosé wine. But then we've got sea salt because it comes in from the Mediterranean. And then it's grounded with like sun bleached woods. Love it. Pink grapefruit. Where can you buy these from? My website. So it's Ouveture, spelled the French way, London. Ouveturelondon.com. Alicia, always a pleasure. never a chore or should I say never a overture doesn't make sense I like it though if you've enjoyed this episode of bottoms up you know where to find us every Wednesday a new episode is dropped on YouTube or wherever you get your podcasts and you know what really helps the podcast is leaving a review it takes literally less than a minute so please do that if you haven't already.

45:52Also, please get in touch with us. No question is too stupid at bottoms up show or bottoms up at listen.co.uk. Bottoms up with Alan Carr and Lee Peart is a listen production. As always, do please drink responsibly. For more information, visit drinkaware.co.uk. Bottoms up.

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