He Wants More Sex Than Me

0:02What is up daddy gang? It is your founding father Alex Cooper with call her daddy. What's up, Daddy Gang? Welcome back to a super soaker, sexy, scandalous, saucy, sausage summer motherfucking episode of Call Her Daddy. Before we get into this episode, I need to do a PSA because recently I found myself doing exactly what I always tell you guys not to do. I'm a little fucking hypocrite. Okay. I was comparing my life to influencers on social media. I, the past, I would say like two weeks have just been like, how are all these fucking bitches moving to the Hamptons for the summer? Like what is happening?

0:52They're like packing my bags, like off to the Hamptons. And I'm like, I fucking wish, like I started to feel like as I'm sitting at my desk, like, wow, like I just was feeling like shit. I was like, oh my God, like I don't have that many fun summer plans and everything I'm basically doing for summer is for work. And like, here's the thing. I'm going to let you in on a little secret. Coming from someone who has gone on trips to the Hamptons and to Italy, it is so beautiful and it is amazing. Okay. But right now I'm going to focus on the fucking negatives because that's what we need to make ourselves feel better as we are endlessly scrolling at our desks this summer.

1:29Daddy gang.

1:46The next time you open TikTok as you're slaving away at your nine to five, I hope this commentary makes you laugh instead of crying over us being jealous of these motherfucking influencers. Okay, Here we go. This is at least my rationale of how I'm getting through it. You guys can get through it however you want, but this is what I will say. The beaches in Italy are literally made up of fucking rocks. Okay. How about that? You want that soft white sand between your toes this summer. You're not getting it in fucking Italy. Okay. You're better off laying in the grass in your backyard or at a local park.

2:23Honestly, a wood slab on your balcony will be more comfortable than laying on the rocks and the concrete that they call beaches in Italy. Okay. So if you're seeing all these bitches gallivanting around Capri or Capri or however the fuck you say it, don't be jealous. Don't worry. Okay. Now maybe you're feeling adventurous and you're like, you know what, Alex, I am okay. I want to lay on the rocks. That sounds comfortable. That sounds relaxing to me. I want to be there. Okay. That's totally fine. Good luck finding a spot to fucking lay down on the rocks. Sardines. Daddy gang, sar motherfucking deans.

3:00People are sweating. They're fighting. They're shoving for space in Italy to even get a spot on the rocks. And I would like to point out while you're laying on said rock, something that would probably sound nice, right? You're laying on the rock. It's kind of jabbing into your back. You're like, oh, fuck. To make it all feel better, you probably would love a little nice ice water, right? Maybe a lemon and ice water. Maybe you want an iced coffee so you can go shit your pants. Okay. Anything iced, honestly, at that point when it's scorching hot joke is on you, bitch. They don't have ice in Italy.

3:34Okay. Well, they do have ice in Italy, but they don't believe in serving it. They don't, they do not believe in serving ice in fucking anything. Okay. Do you guys see where I'm fucking going with this? Welcome back to another episode of color daddy. I'm just happy. I wasn't invited to go to Europe this summer. Okay. Thank God we are not going to Europe this summer and gallivanting around daddy gang, the Ohio grass, the Arizona pools, the Kentucky charm. That is where it's at this summer. People, we did not want to go to Europe anyways. Guys, I'm obviously, obviously like fucking I'm half kidding and I'm half not.

4:08I'm not a fucking idiot. Obviously, Italy would be amazing to go there all summer. The Hamptons would be amazing to go there all summer. But I just feel like we see it so much on social media that everyone is getting to go to these amazing places and it just makes us feel like fucking shit you do not need to go to all these places that you see people online posting from to have a fun filled summer daddy gang and I don't I don't want to see people complaining being like but Alex like I don't have any time like I don't have anything cool to do this summer like my life fucking sucks You do have something fun to do.

4:47Okay, Margaret, the minute work is done, let me pitch you a little something because I did this the other night and I was jazzed up about it. Okay. You're going to go home from work. You're going to make yourself a fun margarita or a little sex on the beach or a Cosmo or whatever the fuck kind of cocktail you want. Okay. You are going to invite a friend over or you're going to do it with your partner or if you don't have any friends at least that live in that city, schedule a FaceTime date with someone, one of your friends, a family member to have a little cocktail hour with a little FaceTime catch up.

5:24And if no one is available for happy hour or you really don't have any friends, happy hour with yourself. Okay. I want you daddy gang this summer. We are going to order those little, you know, those little like, um, the little like cocktail things that are like little umbrellas that you can put in your drink that makes you feel like if you close your eyes and you squint, you're like, I am in Hawaii. I am literally in Hawaii. You're in your apartment. You're going to order these little things on Amazon. Maybe hang up some string lights in your apartment or on your deck. If you have a deck, like make yourself a gorgeous cheese board with some of your favorite snacks and turn on your comfort show, light a candle or go have a fucking picnic at the park.

6:04Go read a book by yourself. Like, I guess the point is like you really can create the vibe wherever you are, Daddy Gang. That is the point. And I honestly, if you live in the suburbs, fucking hell, whip out the goddamn slip and slides. Okay. Back in PA, we used to rip on those tarps. We honestly didn't even have a slip and slide. You just do a bunch of tarp. You put out a hose, you pour some rosé. Even if it's a two buck chuck, force your friends to come outside and come over and make the most of summer. Okay. this season does not have to be expensive. You can have so much fun right where you are.

6:38I love you guys. I just kind of wanted to like say that because social media, like I don't need to say it again, like social media is fake and blah, blah, blah. Like, sure. But let's stop focusing on what all these influencers are doing. Let's stop focusing on what all these people are doing. Focus on yourself. You can have so much fun after your nine to five. Crack open that fucking Corona, take some titty pics, slat in the DMs with a little nipple and have yourself some great sex. Speaking of sex, oh, what a transition. I love when a transition just comes naturally. Let's talk about summertime sex because I don't know if anyone else feels this way or can relate, but I feel like I have better sex in the summer.

7:25Why is that? I don't know. I think it's probably because during the summer, everyone is just naturally less stressed. We are outside more. We're interacting with people more. I feel like everyone has more energy. The endorphins are up. Usually work is a little less hectic. Maybe if you're a lucky person, you get those summer Fridays where you get to leave work early and really kickstart that weekend. But for me personally, my sex life is heavily dependent on my stress level. And I was recently having a conversation with a friend about my honeymoon. And I was telling her that because I was able to be so checked out with work while I was on my honeymoon, it really allowed Matt and I to feel so connected.

8:18and our sex life was thriving, which don't get me wrong. I think that's what most people would expect. You don't expect me to come on here and be like, the honeymoon was dry as fuck. Like, no, obviously we had great sex on our honeymoon, but I was being really honest with my friend and I was like, don't get it twisted. I'm not always having honeymoon level sex with Matt. And for me, I really need to be emotionally connected and not stressed in order to be having consistent good sex like I can have good sex but like it takes me kind of a good amount of relaxation to actually have an orgasm when I'm having sex with my partner like Matt and I we definitely have our dry spells where we can go a week or two weeks even we've gone at times without having sex because we just get so caught up in the busyness of life and work.

9:17And I think it's important to say that because obviously I'm aware and know the origin of this show was very sex heavy, which I'm so happy about. But I do think the reality is like when you are an adult, it is nearly impossible to have a perfect sex life. And I am the first to say it on this show. well, because I am the host and there's no one sitting next to me to say it. I don't have a perfect sex life, especially as a woman. So much goes into our ability to orgasm. Right. And that is something that Matt and I actually talked about. So once we got back from our honeymoon and we got back to L.A., we were in the hot tub like a week after our honeymoon and we were just like reminiscing on our honeymoon.

10:03And Matt and I kind of just started talking about like our sex life. And I know talking about your sex life is quite awkward with your partner. Like I get that even you can be, he's my husband now, but it's still like, Ooh, like, is it like, let's, let's address the elephant in the room. Like how's our sex life doing? And that's my first bit of advice to anyone in the daddy gang. If you are in a relationship, like you, you should consistently be having check-ins just like about your sex life. I just feel like sometimes it can get away from you and you can feel like the more it builds up, then the more awkward it is to have the conversation.

10:38And I, my first bit of advice is like, you can make it fun. It doesn't have to be this like serious conversation to check in with your partner. But for me, Matt and I just started talking about it because we were having this great sex and I brought it up in the hot tub. I was like, I want to admit, like, I know I'm kind of the one that holds like the keys to our sex life in the relationship. Like Matt on paper, you could say has like a higher sex drive than me. And then therefore, as we all know, daddy gang, like the person with like the higher sex drive is like the one that's basically just staring at you.

11:10And the person that doesn't have the higher sex drive is kind of the one that like dictates when you're having sex with your partner. Right. And I just was like, listen, I want to be honest. Like I want to have more of that, like honeymoon, more consistent, like amazing sex. How can we make that happen? And I want to share some things that I realized about myself on our honeymoon that I need from you. And so I don't know if anyone can relate to this, but like for me, like, okay, this is actually a funny story I was thinking about. And I shared with Matt, when we got back from our honeymoon, there was one night where there was like drama in our family going on.

11:43And Matt and I laid in bed and I shit you not for two hours, this man indulged me and talked all the drama with me. And we were going through it and going through it. And we're just laying in the dark talking. And I know this sounds really strange, but I literally started to get turned on because, because Matt's like, this is all it takes me just talking to you for an extended amount of time. I'm like, yes, like he was being so, and like Matt is very emotionally intelligent, which is one of the things I love the most about him because like a lot of men in the past, I, it would be like talking to a wall.

12:14I'm like, nevermind. I'll go call my friend about this, but Matt engages me and like, is down to have these conversations. And so we're talking, we're talking and he's like giving me his like analysis on this one family member. And I'm like, oh my God, you're so right. And like, I'm learning things from him. And I feel like sometimes I would say like, I would be like emotionally leading the charge in our, in my romantic relationships, but Matt meets me toe to toe, but we don't get to do this often. And so I start to get turned on as he's speaking of said family member. I'm not thinking about the family member, you guys, I'm thinking about that.

12:43Okay. And I start to get aroused. What a concept. And I'm like, oh my God, I'm now literally horny because my partner and I have been emotionally connecting. He's listened to me. He's hearing me. I'm hearing him. We're laughing. We're having a good time. And then we proceeded to have incredible sex. The nights that it's easier for Matt to have sex and it's difficult for me to have sex is when I come home from work at seven o 'clock. We're both still kind of on calls. We're like cheersing each other with a little whiskey, but we're both on the phone, like talking to people for work and then we're going upstairs and it's like are we just gonna have like are we just gonna have sex right now we've barely looked at each other all day we've barely spoken all day like it's tough for me to like switch off from work mode to sex mode because I need to fucking relax and when my asshole is clenched thinking about how I haven't edited this episode yet like I can't think about an orgasm because ladies you actually need to physically be relaxed to have an orgasm men can easily fucking jerk it and get the job done that it's not as simple for us so I just wanted to share that with you guys because I don't know I feel like in the past maybe a lot of like the rhetoric on the show was just like if you're not having good sex like dump him like okay well maybe but not in this case I think a lot of it has to do with like having a check-in with yourself of how are you approaching your sex life?

14:13And are you even giving yourself a chance to have great sex? Because for example, like he always makes sure that I'm coming first. And I've gotten very particular to Matt where like there is this one position. I always have an orgasm without a doubt. And now every time Matt's like, let's put you in that position, get your vibrator, let's go. And it always gets me off. Like I'm like, let's fucking go. And Matt now is like, I love that. But how does he know that? Because I told him because I was like, babe, when we do that one position, I come every single time. And he's like, amazing. So I feel like, yes, it can be anxiety inducing to start a conversation with your partner about sex.

14:51And again, I've had people on the show before and I've said it before, like don't have the conversation in the bedroom. But maybe, Daddy Gang, I think this summer is a really great time to lean in and carve out more moments like this. Like maybe your office does summer Fridays, right? So you and your partner can make, I don't know, make a plan to go meet for happy hour after work and like feel fun and flirty going on a date together. That's something that I've said to Matt is like naturally when we eat at home, some nights we're both like not feeling like we're completely on a date. We're like checking our phone.

15:27We're doing these things. We're busy, right? And we're not focused on each other. When we're on a date night, it's like phones down, looking at each other, having wine, and flirting and talking and connecting before we go back to the bedroom. So I think sometimes we may like get down on ourselves. Maybe ladies are like, fuck, like my sex drive hasn't been boa. Trust me. I would say like six months ago, I was really struggling with my sex drive. Like I, my hormones were off. My birth control was changing. There was so much going on. And I was like, what is wrong with me? And then I was like, what if I just tell Matt what I want?

16:01Because I I think a lot of us can agree. Like once you get to a good place in your personal masturbation time with yourself, like I've had times in the past where I'm like, oh, I'd rather just like quickly masturbate because I know I'm going to get myself off. Why though? I know I can now get myself off every time I have sex with Matt. That should be your goal this summer, ladies, is like infuse what gets you off into sex and stop being scared to bring that into the bedroom. They're going to want you to get off. Be selfish. They're about to get off to make sure you get off this summer. I want everyone to just be intentional because if you feel like you're connecting and being intimate outside of the bedroom, here's a little secret.

16:44And I know it sounds so fucking obvious, daddy gang. But if you are more connected outside of the bedroom, if you feel emotionally connected, I feel like specifically as women, it'll be so much easier to bring that energy into the bedroom.

17:13And to all of my single daddy gang, you are not forgotten. I see you. You also deserve a thriving sex life. Okay. So my PSA to you, summertime flings, summertime situationships. relationships in my personal opinion are in. I feel like this summer when you're on the apps, I just feel like you don't need to be looking for marriage material. It can be fun. It can be casual. You just need to find someone that you enjoy hanging out with. He doesn't have to check every single box that's on your to-be-husband list, okay? A summer fling is someone to go drink with, hit the beach with, bring around to parties with you, or ideally they're bringing you to their parties with their friends.

18:05Like essentially look at it like he's just broadening your social calendar. I heavily condone the summertime situationship because I had a very, very, very successful one back in the day. I don't know if you guys remember this, but I remember I this was like years and years ago back when I lived in New York City I remember I met this guy that was friends with a friend and you know I wouldn't say I was like damn he's a 10 and like damn I want to jump his bones and fuck him but I would say when he invited my friends and I over and I recognized that his apartment had a rooftop and that rooftop had a pool, I was more inclined to give this man a chance.

18:59You know, had he maybe not had a rooftop pool, maybe I wouldn't have gone on another date with him. But because this was a fun situation, Chip, I was like, you know what? This is fun for summer. Fuck the guy with the pool. Okay, I said it. Is it surface level? Absolutely. Is it social climbing? No, it's just materialistic climbing. And when you live in New York City and you are fucking dry lizards walking around the fucking block desperate for a fucking Aquafina or a goddamn Fuji, Fuji, wait, regardless, you want water. A nice pool sounds so refreshing. And so I did the one thing that I could to help not only myself, I also think situationships is important to look at it.

19:47It's not just for you. It's for your friends, right? My friends would be like, are you going to see him tonight? Let's hit the pool. And I'm like, I don't want to have sex with this man. No, but for the pool, I'll fuck for the pool. And there I was with my four fucking girls in our flip-flops, our little bikinis being like, hi, we're here for XYZ. And the doorman would let us up and we would go to the pool. And what got even better is by the time that I got that connection really strong. He sometimes would have to go on work trips, but he would let me use his pool without him and don't get it twisted.

20:20Those were my favorite times when I didn't have to see his face. I was just using his amenities. Okay. So rooftop pool boy, that was a perfect example. Another perfect example of a situation ship that actually led to so much more for me was I remember I met this guy on Raya and it was in the middle of summer. I was bored out of my mind. I'm like painting my nails 10 different colors. I'm like picking my hair out, like thinking of dyeing my hair pink. I'm like, what can I do to like feel something, you know? And I finally see this guy on Raya who I'm like, I just don't know if he's got it, but at least he's not a DJ in Australia.

20:55Like this is a guy that lives in New York. I can easily get out of here if it doesn't work out. Okay. And so I go and I meet him for drinks and we met at this like little random pub and we're sitting outside and he's cute. But then all of a sudden, this is what really got me. He told me he had to leave after one drink. And I was like, what? And he was like, I'm so sorry. Like, it's my friend's birthday party at this bar later. I have to go pick up like a couple bottles, whatever, and bring it. And I was like, you have a party that your friend is throwing at his bar in West Village? Um, hi, my name is Alex.

21:33Fuck me sideways. Let's go to the party. And I remember I was like, no way. I was literally giving this man nothing. No wonder he was like leaving after one drink. Then all of a sudden he was like, do you want to come later? Like you can come meet up with us. And I was like, oh, like, let me check my schedule. Yes. And he brought me to this bar later that night and I met all of his friends who were so fucking hot. And if you guys remember my episode from the other week where I said hockey players back then were my type. I walk in and there's three NHL players that he's friends with. And I'm like, you are my favorite fucking situationship that I have ever come in contact with.

22:13Fuck pool boy. I now have athletes in my presence and he wasn't pushing the sex much. He was like maybe a back rubber to that night. And I was like, this is incredible. And so what I started to do in that situationship was really turn it into a friendship. And quickly I was swerving like, no, I'm patting him on the back and trying to shift into his friend group. And you know what I successfully did? That. I immediately became friends with all of the women in the friend group. So the next time that we all hung out, they invited me. He also invited me, but they invited me. And so I'm texting them.

22:43I got in the friend group. I eventually, lovely, we ended up actually being friends. He was a really nice person. And then I fucked his friends. And it was literally amazing. Like it was the summer of a lifetime. I was bopping around. I was homie hopping and I was owning it. I was like, woo, woo, woo. It was a time also where like I was just in a weird place. And so I just every night would show up and be like, who do I want? That is what I want for you guys, daddy gang. I want you guys to find a situationship that you're obsessed with that gives you great orgasm. And if he doesn't, bop to the friends, bop to the homies, bop.

23:13Who knows? Maybe you'll fucking hook up with one of his girlfriends. Like the girls were beautiful in that friend group. Like I had the most fun of my life. Okay. This friend group, there was so much to be done and I did it all. And so while you're sitting in your apartment right now, you're blowing your nose, you have a cold, you're feeling bad for yourself, you're drinking your tea, you're calling your mom five times a day. Stop it. Stop it right now. This summer, it is the summer for a fun situationship, a fun fling, a fun little thing. So daddy gang, this is your sign. Get on the motherfucking apps.

23:47Find a motherfucker that even looks half decent and go infiltrate.

24:08so something I want to talk about today is a topic that has been on my mind so my friend was talking about something that was upsetting her and she kept apologizing like I'm saying like oh oh my God, I'm sorry. Like, I feel like I'm gossiping. And I kept having to remind her, I'm like, you are not gossiping. You're just venting. And that's fine. Which then got me thinking, what is the difference between gossiping and venting? In my opinion, venting is when you are talking about yourself and gossiping is when you're talking about someone else. but I will say as I've grown up and I've started to really reflect on how I connect with my friends and what I'm using my time and my energy for I have noticed surprisingly that I feel like gossip sessions don't really hit the same as they used to I know this is shocking OK, I just think we as women can and should do better when it comes to how we talk about each other.

25:22I feel like that's obvious. Right. Because the sad reality is you and I hate ever giving men. I hate ever giving men a fucking pat on the back. But you rarely hear men gossiping to the extent that women do. That is a fact. And as women, we have to acknowledge we're the leaders of gossiping. Right. When you see someone shit-talking a woman online, it's usually another woman. It's rare that a man's in the comment section being like, what's going on with your face? Or what did you do to your body? It's always a woman going after a woman, right? So I want to break it down today even more talking about the difference of gossiping versus venting.

26:02Let's start with venting, which in my opinion on its own is not toxic. I actually looked it up. yeah we do research on call our daddy okay venting lowers blood pressure boosts the immune system and improves sleep and lessens depression i mean what is not to love about that right let me say that again boosts boosts the immune system improves sleep and lessens depression baby Vent all day. Okay. It makes me think, honestly, venting almost makes me think about therapy, which is basically an hour long vent session. It's a way to feel heard and to feel understood when something has happened to you.