In short
```markdown Call Her Daddy - Episode Notes
Episode Title My Wedding Planning Disaster
Episode Summary In this episode, Alex Cooper shares her chaotic journey of wedding planning and the challenges she faces in selecting a location, dress, and overall vibe for her big day. From her unconventional decision to walk herself down the aisle to spontaneous wedding dress shopping, Alex's reflections offer both comedic and poignant insights into the wedding planning process.
Key Themes and Discussions
- Wedding Location Dilemmas
- Initial Choices:
- Alex initially considers Utah for sentimental reasons but dismisses it due to restrictive alcohol laws.
- Further options include Aspen and Hawaii, both of which present their own issues (e.g., public beaches in Hawaii).
- Tennessee and Blackberry Farms:
- After a brunch conversation, Alex is intrigued by Blackberry Farms in Tennessee, known for its rustic charm and activities. However, she realizes she wants a wedding that prioritizes her and Matt's enjoyment over guest activities.
- London & Paris:
- Alex contemplates London due to its significance in her relationship but decides against it as it reminds her of work.
- Paris is briefly considered but quickly dismissed.
- Final Thoughts:
- The decision-making process emphasizes the importance of personal significance over guest satisfaction and the desire to keep the ceremony intimate.
- Non-Traditional Choices
- Walking Down the Aisle:
- Alex decides to walk herself down the aisle, rejecting traditional customs that feel outdated or cringe-worthy. She wants the moment to be her own.
- Bridesmaids:
- Alex expresses her desire to have no formal bridesmaids, allowing her friends to be part of the day without specific obligations, emphasizing comfort and personal connection over tradition.
- The Wedding Dress Shopping Experience
- Spontaneity:
- On a whim, Alex goes wedding dress shopping while high, taking her mother along for the experience. Her unfiltered approach adds to the comedic tone of the episode.
- Dress Preferences:
- Alex tries on various styles, expressing her evolving tastes and comfort level. She grapples with her initial ideas versus what she feels suit her best.
- Self-Discovery:
- She emphasizes the importance of finding a dress that makes her feel confident and authentic, rather than one that fits societal expectations or trends.
- Reflections on Wedding Pressures
- Expectations vs. Reality:
- Alex highlights the unrealistic pressures often portrayed in wedding culture, advocating for a more relaxed and authentic approach to the special day.
- Guest Experience vs. Personal Joy:
- Throughout her planning, Alex stresses that the wedding should be about her and Matt's connection rather than focusing solely on guest entertainment.
Key Takeaways
- Authenticity Over Tradition: Alex promotes a wedding that reflects personal values and preferences, encouraging brides to prioritize their happiness.
- Chaos is Normal: The rollercoaster of wedding planning can be overwhelming, and it's okay to not have everything figured out.
- Celebrate Individuality: Walking down the aisle alone and choosing unique styles reinforces the theme of personal choice in wedding planning.
- Enjoy the Journey: The process can be filled with anxiety but also opportunities for fun and connection, especially when involving loved ones.
Conclusion Alex closes the episode, humorously acknowledging the unpredictability of wedding planning while expressing excitement for the journey ahead. The episode not only entertains but also resonates with anyone who has navigated the complexities of planning a significant life event. ```
Written by AI. May contain mistakes. Listen to the episode to check what was said.
Transcript
Automatic transcript. May contain errors.0:02What is up daddy gang? It is your founding father Alex Cooper with Call Her Daddy
0:14Hello?
0:20Bruce, where's mom? Alex?
0:29Okay.
0:43Oh hi Henry. Alex?
0:54This is what wedding planning is doing to me. Alex it's 9am. Fuck off!
1:18We gotta talk. Hello, Daddy Gang. It is your founding father. Back at it again for another episode of Call Her Daddy. If you are driving down the freeway, cruising to work, cruising to go fuck your ex-boyfriend, pause because you should probably watch this episode. So after you fuck him, then go home and debrief with me. I am currently in a bathtub. That's why you need to watch this. I'm in a bathtub with a veil on my head, drinking wine at 9 a.m. Why am I drinking wine at 9 a.m., you may ask. I do that all the time. What are you talking about, don't you? No, I'm actually freaking out. Clearly, I look like I'm having a mental fucking breakdown.
1:51I'm trying to plan my wedding. The last you guys heard from me, I got engaged. It was beautiful. Mac got me the ring. I was thriving. And then right after we got engaged, everyone started asking the dreaded motherfucking question. Alex when are you getting married? Fuck off I don't know so now I'm having to plan my fucking wedding I never dreamt of it growing up I don't know what I want to look like where I want it to be what's happening so to try to really illustrate the state of my wedding planning let me walk you through all the possibilities of countries and states and locations and everything that I have debated having my wedding in throughout this godforsaken motherfucking process hence why I said, get some wine or take some fucking drugs because this is a wild motherfucking ride.
2:39Don't do drugs, but you know what I'm saying. Okay. Let me start you off with a great, great, beautiful place. This is the first location that Matt and I were like, this is where we're getting married. Utah. Why the fuck would we get married in Utah? I grew up going skiing in Utah. Then when Matt and I met, we would always go skiing and snowboarding and we would go there every Christmas since we go to Utah. And it's a really special place because number one, I love fucking Christmas. Okay. Christmas album probably coming soon. And number two, I just love skiing and I love what it, you know, what it does to my brain.
3:10And I love being in the cold in the winter. It's just great. So Matt and I had a personal connection to Utah. And so we hired these wedding planners and we told them Utah is one of our places. So our first meeting, we get on with them to like look at Utah locations. It's like nine in the morning. And as they're talking about Utah for like 30 seconds, I say, oh my God, pause. Absolutely pause. We can't get married in Utah. And everyone's like, oh my God, starting fucking strong, this bitch. We can't get married in Utah because I want to take fucking shots at my wedding. I want to pour alcohol down Matt's throat.
3:47I want to rage at my wedding. And if you don't know this, in Utah, there are drinking laws, okay? You can't like take shots and like they put only a certain amount of alcohol in your cup and like they basically do everything to prevent you from being able to get fucking hammered or even a buzz. I remember last time I was in Utah, I had five fucking martinis. My dad was sitting next to being like, sweetie, do you want to talk about something? What's wrong? I'm like, dad, I couldn't be more sober. You want me to drive home tonight? Like I am so stone cold sober. You can't get drunk in Utah. So we can't get married in Utah.
4:17The woman was like, is that the only reason you don't want to get married in Utah? I'm like, yeah. Like imagine not being able to get a little fucking buzz at your wedding. I'm gonna like be nervous like I need something to get me through the night and also I want to have fun so naturally I still liked the idea though of a winter location daddy gang something about Big Al near the slopes the snow's fallen Henry's in a coat Bruce is in a tux like it's just giving it's giving vibes so then I'm like okay where else is a good location Aspen okay Similar vibe to Aspen, right? Utah, Aspen, similar vibe.
4:53A little bougie for my liking, but then I realized, why am I picking a winter location? Let's be real. I love being in the snow with 15 fucking layers on. The thought of me being at my wedding, freezing cold, and the last thing I want my wedding to have is like, well, you'll get married here if weather permits. Can you fucking imagine weather permits? My fucking luck, I would have the biggest blizzard and a hundred fucking years, half the wedding party would be stuck in Pennsylvania and half the wedding party, we would just be stuck in a fucking blizzard. The cold love yet. Let's keep it for Christmas, for snowing, for hot cocoa, for Santa.
5:33Also, this is very, very minuscule, but I have to be honest. I've been doing Pilates. You guys know me. I'm never hitting the gym. I've been hitting Pilates and I've told my Pilates instructor, we have one goal. you can't see my ass in a wedding dress you can't see these legs in a wedding dress but you goddamn gonna see these motherfucking arms in that wedding dress so I've been putting in work you can't see the muscle now but it will fucking be there by the time I get married and I will fucking over my dead body cover these fucking arms with a long sleeve with snow no thank you I want to show these babies off if I'm going to the fucking gym for them you will be seeing the curvature that will soon enter this limb.
6:15So where does that bring us? I want to show off my little fucking arms. Hawaii. Utah, Aspen, Utah. Now to Hawaii. Let's go. I go the complete opposite. Okay, daddy gang, just bear with me here because we got a long ways to go. I say to Matt, Matt, where is warm? Hawaii. Where do we love that's tropical? Hawaii. Matt and I have been together to Hawaii. It's been fabulous vibes every time we've gone. It's just your blood pressure drops when you get to the airport. You love the smell. You love the people. It's amazing. The issue for Hawaii, because, you know, we got to just keep going. What's the issue, Alex?
6:54We're moving on. The issue for Hawaii is all of the beaches are public. I talked to my brother because he went to a Hawaiian wedding and he was like, it was one of the most beautiful weddings I've ever been to however there were so many random people in the photos and posting up watching the wedding I don't need Uncle Marty on his retirement trip in the background snorkeling belly up holding a fucking pina colada in my shot Matt and I are kissing and it's like oh there's that that guy belly up like nice little frosted tips having a midlife crisis in the fucking ocean it's just not what I want.
7:31So I realized I really don't want to be somewhere that like publicly people can consume our wedding because let me be honest with you. We've all done it. Are you kidding me? I've been at the resort. I've been like, you know what? Oh my God, we're walking by. I've got my pina colada and I see two young folk or two old folk or whoever the fuck they are. And they're getting married on a beach. You bet your fucking bottom dollar that my ass is popping a squat on that lawn chair and I'm going to watch the wedding as the sunset goes down as just my little cocktail hour as just a little anecdote and added to my amazing nice sunset view so I didn't even want to potentially have a big wedding or having a wedding at all I thought maybe courthouse is the vibe so I would rather die than fucking be standing there and people are just on looking staring at me and Matt getting married it's not happening it's not going to work so a public beach it's for me to watch other people's weddings, not you to watch my wedding.
8:31So Hawaii, I love you. I'll be back for a nice little road. Who knows? Maybe we'll do our fucking honeymoon there. And I think on top of all of this, when you think about Hawaii right now, God bless every fucking family that has been affected by what is happening in Maui and all across Hawaii. It is fucking devastating. They don't need annoying fucking people like me going to Hawaii and be like, I want to get married here like this little fucking annoying bitch. Let's fucking donate proceeds to Hawaii and make sure they're good before we trounce in in our white dresses being bridezillas. Okay.
9:02That's, that's a huge other factor. So next, where do we go from Hawaii? Where do we go? You would think, oh my God, we're going to go to another tropical. Absolutely not. Absolutely not. Baby, we're going to Tennessee, you're probably like, Alex, we're usually on the same page as you. How did we get here? You know what I mean? How did we get from Utah, Aspen, Hawaii, Tennessee? Let me explain it to you. The other day, Matt and I are at this gorgeous Soho house brunch, airing out all of our grievances to our friends that have already been married. They're a great couple. We love them. Matt is literally the godfather to their children.
9:44We are just comfy cozy, just shit talking ourselves about our wedding. And they tell us that they recently went to one of the most beautiful places ever. They said it was our friend's birthday. And we went to this place called Blackberry Farms. All the food is grown on the property. It's amazing. There is archery, there's horseback riding, there's apple picking, there's canoeing, and everyone gets their own cabin. It is the most bougie yet rustic place they've ever been. Okay. And I am like Blackberry Motherfucking farms Here we come Maddie Let's get on a horse And get it up So for almost a week Matt and I Were sitting there Being like We are fully Getting married in Tennessee And I know also What you're thinking Because I thought it too Matt's from fucking LA And I'm from the east coast Okay We're coast babies I personally never Really imagined myself Getting married In the south But in that moment It was feeling right Okay I was like I guess I'm getting married and 10 and motherfucking C.
10:46Maybe I'll wear cowboy boots underneath my dress, okay? And then this to get real for a second, because I know you probably can't take me serious with my veil and my wine at 9 a.m. in my bathtub. I think I started to realize over that week that we had kind of set on Blackberry Farm. What I realized is this location, as gorgeous and magical as it is, for me and Matt and our personalities, this location would have been fun for our guests to have all of these grand, perfect activities. But I don't want to do shit on my wedding day other than drink, hence the issue in Utah, and be with Matt. I don't want to get on a horse.
11:32I don't want to do archery. I don't want to apple pick. I don't want to fucking see an apple on my wedding day. I want tequila, vodka, a cake, and some dick, okay? So I realized we have to keep realigning ourselves. This isn't about anyone else, but me and my partner. And it's really fucking hard. And I realized I've talked to a lot of my friends. This is one of like the most relatable things that we've all realized we're going through. It's like, you don't need to prioritize anyone else on your wedding day. And Tennessee was catering towards everyone else, making sure they had all of these things to do.
12:07They could get on a fucking horse and gallop into the sunset. I don't want to do that on my wedding day. I don't want Matt going and fucking golfing on our wedding day. So where do we go from Tennessee? Because, you know, you must think it's just full stop there. Just get married in your fucking backyard, you cunt. Absolutely not. Absolutely not. We're going to ramp it up. Notice how I was like, countries? The next location from Tennessee, you may ask.
12:42England, obviously. England, London. We're going to fucking London, baby. When we thought of London, we said we can hit two, what the fuck is the saying? Two birds with one stone. Absolutely. Two stones, one bird. Nope. Two birds, one stone. We said we want it to be somewhere that matters to us and also we don't want to cater to our guests all of our friends are like fuck you what London is far away so we could weed out the fluff okay we're hoping no one shows up and also Matt and I truly fell in love in London whenever we talk to friends or family and they ask us about meeting and our love story London is truly like at the core of that so I did a lot of episodes from there if you guys are new here during the pandemic Matt and I basically lived in a hotel room in London okay and when I say a hotel room in London we were on top of each other with Henry in the middle of a global pandemic and because Matt had been making a movie there and then everything got shut down and we were stuck in London together and this was one of those moments like make or break you know what I mean baby like make or break because I could either fucking hate him or I would have fallen in love and obviously you know which way that went and so it really seems like such a magical place, London to us.
13:58But then, then I realized, because again, guys, this isn't, this is no happy ending. I realize, eh, maybe not. You know what I mean? Maybe not. Maybe we shouldn't get married in London. Matt and I do a lot of business and work in London. So it is a place that we do frequent a lot. And when I think of work, as much as I think of our love story. I think about Matt making movies, to be honest. He makes so many movies in London and it is like his main hub of where he makes movies. So I don't really want to go and think about work. I don't want to think about like, Ooh, what's your next movie, babe?
14:37Because Matt and I are workaholics. And so I'm like, we don't need to be anywhere that reminds us of making a movie or making a podcast. Well, I'll probably fucking podcast. I literally said to Matt, I'm like, watch everyone's doing vows, everyone, me and Matt. And I slowly at my turn, pick up my microphone out of nowhere and Matt's like Alex this is not about the podcast everything's about the podcast dedicated I will find a way I'm gonna get mic'd up I'm gonna do something at my wedding for you no but I didn't want to feel like we were getting married between shots of his fucking movie or between shots of my podcast I wanted something a little more vacation vibe okay before I got to vacation vibe I quickly said what about Paris it is just we're not well we are so fucking unwell It is just, we're cruising.
15:23Okay, what could be more romantic than Paris? But a European wedding does sound nice. Okay, that lasted literally less than 30 minutes. Paris was so fucking short-lived. Came and went over the course of a dinner. Do I have a water mustache? Absolutely. Okay, so now to the final. You ready? Tropical. We are currently choosing a tropical location. And when I look you in the eyes right now, because I'm really making eye contact here. When I say this, just know I could be lying and this could change in the next 30 when Matt gets home. Well, actually this whole thing could change when he comes home and finds me in a bathtub.
16:01He's like, babe, we need to ramp up therapy to twice a week, what's wrong with you? No, but we decided on tropical so far and now we've been on tropical for the past three weeks. We have a few tropical contenders and it's stressful because I wanna go fucking see these places. I don't wanna just look up on Google or have our wedding planners show us some photos and be like, go get married in this amazing tropical location. I'm like, yeah, but where are we actually standing? Like, what is it gonna look like? Like, and I'm having a hard time. So Matt and I currently have a list of like 16 fucking tropical places.
16:32We're gonna try to whittle it down to two places and then go visit the two or three in like a little weekend trip, okay? We also decided wherever tropical we choose, which I think maybe like is kind of a good idea for us. When we choose our location, I said to Matt, Matt, you are a producer for a living. I'm an entertainer for a living. We have a really hard time if our friends are all together. You don't even have to be a producer or an entertainer. There are so many people that like love to entertain. We have a really hard time relaxing. And so I'm like, Matt, we can, we need to find a way to relax.
17:08So Matt and I decided wherever we choose tropical we are gonna go three to four days ahead of the wedding okay or even three to four days before everyone arrives so that way we have four days alone okay it's four days of alone time to get in full vacation mode and by the time that everyone comes we're so excited to see people like I don't want to get there and feel stressed that I'm not getting time with my soon to be husband and I'm literally like saying hi to everyone and I can barely have time with Matt that's my fucking nightmare and I said to Matt the minute that that starts to become our reality baby we're going down to the courthouse I refuse this it's so important for me that Matt and I actually have this day to ourselves and I think that's a huge thing that I hear from people on their weddings are like I wasn't even present I didn't even I don't even remember if I got to speak to my partner that night.
18:00Like it was all a blur. I am like, I'm taking all of your advice and I refuse to not be present with my partner. I would rather every fucking person at our wedding have the worst goddamn time and Matt and I fucking thrive. So in conclusion, I don't have a location yet. We do always have my parents' backyard in Newtown, Pennsylvania in the cul-de-sac. um but honestly I'm at the place where I'm like Matt we're gonna pick these like two or three locations let's fucking pick out of a hat unless we fall in love with it on obviously if we're just torn hat put a treat down have Henry run to one two or three like I don't fucking know I'm realizing it's just more important that we are present together no it's not about the location it's not about the pictures or whatever but I do know what I want to feel like on my wedding day that's all I know.
18:51Okay. At the beginning of planning, Matt and I promised each other, like I said, we need to feel present and connected on this day. We should feel like the guests of honor at our wedding, not the hosts. And I know that's going to be difficult for us. We should feel actually relaxed and enjoying ourselves. And if people have a good time, they're going to have a good time. It's not about them. It's about Matt and I. And then I think the other side of this, and I am embarrassed to say this, but I started really finding myself like thinking of these places and what they would look like in pictures.
19:27I was wedding planning through the lens of Instagram and magazine coverage of my wedding. Like you think about it, I'm like whether a rustic cottage in Tennessee would look amazing with this backdrop. Like even I'm finding things that like weren't even personal to me. I'm like looking for a good photo op. Like I realize I need to fucking practice what I preach. Stop making decisions based off of what other people are going to see. And the photo, make the decision off of what is going to make you happy. I'm not going to let myself make a decision that's going to be dependent upon visually appealing to someone else's gaze.
20:01Everyone else wants a cool wedding. Everyone thinks a wedding is cool in a certain different way. Like everyone's standards are so fucking different. What I will say is I know I look a little disheveled right now. Matt and I are having fun with it I'm stressed about the location because I'm like excited I'm like I never knew What I wanted to do for my wedding like I said I have no fucking clue what we're doing It is fun to do together And we sit at night and we have our wine over dinner And we're like picturing what we want to do So I would just also say I understand that sometimes You gotta fucking listen to some people Whether it's they're helping pay for it Or you have a very strict like mom Or dad or whoever the fuck try to get zen and actually fucking enjoy this because contrary to what everyone writes on the internet and I don't know if this is going to get backlash for me I don't think this should be the best day of your life I don't I think your marriage should be incredible and you should be looking forward to life but that day you're putting too much pressure on it so I'm gonna get out of this tub because this tub is 100 degrees and I'm hoping that this camera is not showing the fact that I am drenched and it's not from water this is I am sweating my fucking clit off right now and and my pruney ass fingers are literally curling in to the point where I can't even pick up my wine glass because it's sliding the fuck over so cheers daddy gang we're gonna take a little shower we're going to get ourselves presentable and we're going to head down to the living room so i can actually think straight because
21:48matt no i'm okay i'm okay it's just for the podcast i swear it's totally fine
22:14Okay, I'm dry. I'm back from my bath and I'm feeling refreshed. I took a shower. I blew dry my hair, put on some fucking makeup because I was feeling like a wet dog. I had you guys write in some questions about Alex, you know, what's your wedding going to be like? Because I know I just told you guys all about like my mental breakdown of how I'm fully not able to choose a location, but there's a lot of other details that come with a wedding, right? And so I had you guys DM me any question that you want to know. I'm going to be honest and say, I don't know if I'm going to be able to answer all of them, but I'm going to do my best for you today, Daddy Gang.
22:51And honestly, I just realized as I'm saying this, hopefully by me talking through these questions, I get some fucking clarity for myself. And I'm able to go back to Matt and be like, babe, I just figured out our whole wedding today because of Caller Daddy's episode. So here we go. What are some absolutes you immediately knew you wanted or you did not want for your wedding? Okay. Things that I knew I wanted was I wanted it to be so fucking small. I, the minute we started planning, I didn't have a list. I don't have a Pinterest board. I didn't have anything. But the first thing I was like I want it to be so fucking small and by so fucking small like maybe it's just Matt and I like I would be okay with that that's how small I want it and then things I knew I didn't want I did not want to invite a single person to my wedding that if I got trapped in a corner with them having a long conversation I want to be comfortable with that person like I don't want to invite anyone to my wedding that I'm not that comfortable with that like I would be like how the fuck did I get stuck by the charcuterie board?
23:51And like, I literally don't want to talk to this man. Like I would rather die than be at my own fucking wedding. I'm not doing that. So everyone has to be super close to us. I think the main point is I really want to have a curated group of people that I'm super close with. And this isn't about appeasing other people. This is about a day about Matt and I and celebrating our relationship. So people that are close to us should be there and people that are not, you know, stay home, watch Netflix, hang out with your fucking kids. Don't come to my wedding. Okay. Are you sleeping in a separate bedroom the night before the wedding or are you and Matt going to sleep together?
24:25I am absolutely fucking him the night before our wedding. Are you fucking kidding me? Like it's not even a question. I also can think about that sex before your fucking wedding. I feel like that's going to be really fucking good sex because you're like, we know what's coming tomorrow. Like that's kind of fun. Um, the other issue I will say as I'm staring down at my spray tan hands is like It could just be one issue is like he cannot come on my back or like anywhere on my spray tan the night before because That will completely ruin my wedding day if I have like cum marks that rubbed off my spray tan That can't happen matt So maybe I guess we're just gonna have to get pregnant that night Come inside me or come on the fucking sheets, but not near me or on me.
25:06Okay. Thank you. God bless and And moving on. Okay. What are your thoughts on first look versus seeing each other for the first time when walking down the aisle? I haven't even fucking thought about that. Okay. First look means like you would go and meet up and take like pictures before you walk down the aisle as opposed to then just the first time Matt sees me would be me walking down the aisle. I think my initial reaction is I don't give a fuck, but then I'm like, you know what? maybe we won't do a first look just so I can make that motherfucker sob. Like I want to see Matt hawking a loogie up at the fucking aisle as opposed to him like seeing me quickly for photos.
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25:53Like, I think it'll be fun to watch him cry. What if he doesn't cry? Matt, if you're watching this, bring some fucking eye drops. The dreaded guest list. Talk to us about it. Any family you're being forced to invite any people you and Matt couldn't agree on. Okay. So I was talking to Matt about this the other day and poor Matt. So when we were in Nantucket for vacation this summer, we like had wine one night and we were like, let's put our wedding list together. And it was kind of fun because we're just going through and we're writing a list and we're getting to comment on all of our friends and family.
26:28It's just a big shit talking set. No, I'm just kidding. But kind of you're like, Oh, we don't want them there. And we got it to about like 85 people. Again, we knew we wanted to be pretty small. And I guess for a wedding that small to me, I was like, this is the biggest fucking wedding. Like, how did we get 85 people? Like, this can't be happening. And I had severe anxiety when we made the list 85 people. I'm like, we agreed, like, there's not going to be that many people. We got to 85. so then the other night I he walked in from work and I said I just want you to know I cut our list from 85 to 60 people we got rid of 25 people on the list and he was just like I'm gonna go pour myself a drink but I was like oh who did you cut like do I have a say and I'm like absolutely not like they're they're gone no then I showed him the list and he was okay with the people but now we're down to 60 people and I texted my mom I'm like I just cut another 25 don't worry you're still on the list I'll let you know if you make the next cut like I'm just chopping the fuck out of people are you doing bridesmaids okay so this is something I was actually talking about with my friends I am not gonna have everyone wearing the same color dress it's just not for me it it I want everyone to wear what they want to fucking wear I don't want to be like if you're not an olive green don't step foot on the promises like it's okay wear what you want to wear um and I also don't want people standing up there.
27:49I think I just want it to be Matt and I, but I'm going to have them getting ready with me. We're going to have champagne and drinks and do a bunch of drugs before. And no, I'm just kidding. What? Um, no, but we're going to be in the room and they're going to be with me till the last minute. And then I'm going to go out there obviously on my own, but like, I'm not going to have anyone stand up there, but they'll know, like they know they're my bridesmaids. We're just not wearing the same color and they're not standing in that row. how fucked up do you see yourself getting on your wedding night oh that's a great question because like I don't want to be blackout belligy but I do feel it would be advantageous for me to get tipsy enough that like I'm having a good time and like I'm like a little buzzed but not to the point where I'm like vomiting I think that I think it's something Matt and I have to talk about I can only fucking imagine wait daddy gang please write this in how fucking sad if one of you gets so fucked up and is like literally blackout like has to go upstairs and is passed out that has to have happened at a wedding where like the the groom is motherfucking blackout just like flailing everywhere can't see he has to be put to bed tucked in night night and the bride is literally like, I guess I'm like literally just going to go fuck myself and buy myself on my wedding.
29:06I bet that's happened. So I think I'm going to err on the side of caution because I feel like I'm going to be high on life. I don't need to overdrink. Is that fair? Next question is, where do you stand when it comes to tradition? fuck tradition my poor parents um yeah I'm not a traditional gal um Matt and I both grew up with different religions Matt's Jewish I was raised Catholic we are not going to infuse any type of religion into our wedding um it's going to be pretty not traditional actually my it was really cute Matt and I went and met up with my brother who now lives in Los Angeles and we asked him to officiate our wedding.
29:52So my brother Grant is going to be the person that's officiating our wedding. And I think the last thing that may be the most like off tradition that I've decided I'm going to do is I am going to walk myself down the aisle. I'm not going to have my dad walk me down the aisle or my parents. My dad and I have a great relationship. My mom and I have a great relationship it's more just that I I was like having a really hard time like what feels so cringe to me about walking down an aisle and I talked about it with my therapist and she was super helpful she was like okay it shouldn't feel cringe so let's talk about it and I'm like I just can't picture it like I'm having a really hard time like envisioning myself walking down an aisle and and finally I got underneath it and I think it's because I love my dad so much this has nothing to do with my fucking dad but getting married traditionally is based in like a misogynistic culture I'm sorry we just have to put it out there like a woman is being given away to a man with her dad standing next to her and I'm not saying it's fucked up if anyone listening to this has their dad walking them down the aisle because I know that's not what you're thinking about but my brain I just can't get past the thought of my dad walking me to Matt and then on top of it I My therapist was like, okay, so have your mom and your dad.
31:18Like your family is joining his family. Like walk down together. And something about it, I just feel like I just want to do it myself. Like I feel like this is a decision that I'm making individually. And this isn't about like, of course, my parents got me to this point to be who I am today. But something about it is like I'm so proud of my relationship with Matt. This is really just about Matt and I right now in this moment. I want us to walk down separately and individually and it just be about us and not about like this big family thing like we all love each other's families we're obsessed with each other I'm so happy we're so lucky I love Matt's family he loves their their family loves my family like it's all great I don't know does that make sense like I just I want to feel like an individual and I want to be like proud of myself for being able to walk myself down the aisle.
32:09Like I don't need anyone to hold my hand. I'm going to walk down and meet Matt at the end and do it. I know my dad is going to be like, I would expect this, Alex. Like this is so you, it's totally fine. I feel like also I am literally by having a podcast, I am constantly having to talk about feelings and being a woman and what it takes to be a woman, whether it's in an industry and trying to be a boss or have individuality or being confident in yourself. And I feel like because I'm constantly thinking of these things, when I think about a wedding, I'm thinking also about like the themes in a wedding where maybe most people aren't like, what is the root of marriage?
32:54And it's like literally women being sold to men and the dads giving away their daughter as property. That is where it comes from. Not to make this like a sad, really depressing episode, but that is the root of it. Like the woman in white, the virgin take off the veil. Now you can go fuck her. Her first time she's going to bleed on the white. Like it's literally so fucked. So I can't look past it. So I'm trying to modernize the fuck out of my wedding. I went, you know what? Maybe I'll walk down first and then Matt comes and meets me. Come on. Maybe we'll fuck the whole thing up. It's more just like, yeah, I can't, my brain goes to these things and a part of me wishes it didn't like, trust me.
33:34I'm not like guys, feminism, wedding, my wedding will be a feminist wedding. It's actually not about that. Okay. Next. Oh my God. Will you go full make out and tongue when you kiss during the ceremony? When they're like, you may kiss the bride. Also, I'm going to make sure my brother doesn't say you may kiss the bride. You may kiss each other. Like, why does it have to be Matt kissing me. Guys. Okay. I'm going to stop. Like, I'm sorry, but do you see what I'm saying? It's so fucked up. It's like, here you go. You can kiss her. What if I want to kiss him first, bitch? Um, I have to stop. Everyone's like, Alex, let us just live in tradition for one event of our lives and feel like princesses.
34:13I want to be a fucking prince. Um, okay. I think like, that's actually a good question. Like what if I go in for the tongue and Matt fully lock lips me we need to discuss this match I think a little bit of talent but not too much where we're like save that for later what I do know is multiple of the questions in my dms are take us wedding dress shopping with you just so you guys know I don't have that scheduled for myself let alone you know even for you I don't even I haven't even marked on my calendar when I would want to go dress shopping. And the good thing about this podcast is it does really force me to just do things, right?
34:54Get up and go. So as I'm sitting here, I don't know if I'm going to regret saying this, but I'm just wondering, should I just pick up the phone, call a fucking wedding place and go try on wedding dresses? As I'm saying this, I'm like, yeah, this is what I'm going to do. Because if I don't do it today, if I don't go find a wedding dress or at least start the process, Like what style do I like? If I don't go today, I'm never going to fucking do it. I'm going to procrastinate to the point that I'm literally wearing fucking sweats to my wedding. And that is the one thing I'm actually not going to let myself do.
35:22Because although that would be fucking so me, I'm not going to do it. Although I could wear sweats underneath my dress. I'm calling someone that I work with and she's currently getting married also. Hello. Caitlin. Yes. Okay. I am sitting and recording the podcast right now. and I just decided I need to go right now or I'm never going to do it wedding dress shopping. Can you tell me a place that I can go in LA? I love you so much. Please make the appointment so I do not fucking back out. Okay. Okay. Love you. Thank you. Bye. She's like, sweetie, let's go. Okay. So we're about to make a fucking appointment and we are going to go wedding dress shopping.
36:08And you know, it's actually really fucking cute. I just realized my mom is in town right now. She's staying with Matt and I and she obviously lives on the East Coast. So when I was thinking about obviously wedding dress shopping, I didn't know when I was going to do it, but I was not anticipating that like my mom would be able to come and do it with me. And now I'm realizing I'm going to go ask her if she wants to come with me. Mom, come here. Yeah. What? What are you doing? Will you go wedding dress shopping with me? Are you serious? Yeah. Oh my god. Yes. Like today. Are you serious? Today. Like literally right now.
36:50Wait. Now? Caitlin just got me an appointment. Will you come? Oh my god. Can I get changed? You look great. You look so cute. Oh my god. You'll come? Yes. I'll come. Oh my god. I'm so excited.
37:02Come on. Let's go. Okay, don't look in my closet. Caitlin literally just texted me and said, do not, for the love of God, wear your hot pink underwear that you're always fucking in at photo shoots. Like, you'll be able to see that through the dresses. So thankfully, I put on tan underwear today. So that was, it was meant to be. Do you guys like how organized my closet is? So I will not lie. I'm getting already a little anxious because like this was meant to be a joke daddy gang like as you see I'm not I don't have anything prepared with my life and my wedding and I'm a disaster with regard to everything right now like I don't have answers and I thought at first when I said like let's go try on wedding dresses and then when my mom just hugged me downstairs I'm not gonna lie it like stressed me the fuck out because I'm like, this is actually real.
37:53Like my mom's gonna come wedding dress shopping with me. This was supposed to be like a funny thing for the podcast. And now I'm like actually going wedding dress shopping with my mother. So I'm gonna be really honest because we keep it real here. I'm gonna get fucking high as shit right now because I cannot be fully sober going and doing this or I'm gonna have a panic attack. And let's just be real. It's gonna be more fun for you guys to watch. Let's go out on my fucking balcony. My poor mother is not gonna understand like that I'm high. Like, actually, I'm pretty sure that my mom was like a fucking pothead when she was younger, but she would never say that.
38:33I always take edibles. I rarely ever smoke joints anymore.
38:41i know i'm not gonna find my dress today but i'm my goal is to at least understand and narrow it down to like what dress style i like all right let's go okay i'll smoke a little more before we go in i'm just not gonna tell my mom because we don't need her being paranoid that i'm too high She's like, well, are you sure you can't make the decision? You're high. Let's go! We're going to the chapel and we're gonna get married. We're going to the chapel and we're gonna get married. Album coming soon.
39:30Is she high?
39:36Let's go. This is going to be really interesting. Yeah, it'll be great.
39:50Alright guys, it's game day.
39:58Are you good? This is so nice hearing myself in here. Daddy gang you're more than good you're great I feel like right now it's kind of hitting me I think that the reason that I was so able to say that I was gonna go do this is because I love views and I love content and I want to give everything to the daddy gang like I want everyone to be like that was so fun but I'm not gonna lie now that it's registering in my brain that I am currently sitting in the back of a car getting driven to an appointment in Santa Monica at a wedding dress shop. It's starting to feel a little weirdly weird, weirdly, weirdly real.
40:45This is so far removed from anything I thought we'd be doing. I don't even care if it is for content. I want to just go and do it and have a good time. Okay, so my high is definitely kicked in feeling oh yeah i am high just so you know okay good to know because i was getting concerned about the behavior okay go into the job
41:14are we gonna do a dj are we gonna do a band i think a band is totally fun it just would have to be like a band that actually like gets it and I don't want to rely on band goers coming in and setting the vibe of my wedding I want to fucking DJ let's talk about the dream scenario Matt's walking down the aisle John Lennon is playing the piano okay John's coming in he's like friend of the show vibes let's go then Jen John legend did I say Lennon fuck it's it's not we're bringing back from the i mean if i could have the fucking beatles john legend i love you but the fucking beatles john legend as matt is walking down the aisle oh me loves and then i turn the corner and then christina aguilera punts john to the side and christina starts singing
42:08isn't that from twilight and it's literally not her christina starts singing one of her iconic songs as I proceed down the aisle right as we kiss and we're walking out Miley comes out and Miley just starts giving us an anthem like a a hit then we go into the reception chain smokers are playing they're getting everyone warmed up it's like boom boom boom then Post Malone boom on the fucking stage got me saying wow all of a sudden everyone's like we just can't like there's not gonna be more like she can't bring out more obviously and then very end all of a sudden guess who comes on stage i didn't i didn't even think i i well no you know what i take this back miley's not fucking singing at the right after we kiss miley's fucking closing the night so yeah that is uh that's what my wedding will look like i'm just kidding i'll have a fucking dj i guess
43:23I'm dead. Father.
43:28Give me a hint.
43:39Have you ever smoked weed before? Together? Before ever. Never together. First time's a charm. Let's go. Let's just be really clear. Everyone has to be really fucking honest. Like I don't want any like it looks so beautiful and it's like a rat's nest on my ass. Okay. I need honesty. Club. Another club. Honesty. Honesty. Let's go. Oh, here we go.
44:14Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. Wait. I can't even get you seriously already. Hello. Hey, welcome. Hi. Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you. Okay, here we go. Um, I don't know anything, so I need your help. Very classy, very simple. I'm like boring simple. But I think we've got to try some big ones some like strapless long sleeve like I think we just Everything yeah, I've never tried a wedding dress on in my entire life. So let's do it
45:06Couldn't have told you I'd even be here I'll take champagne sure yeah, I mean we're here right I'm gonna start taking my pants off now, but you guys stay here I'm gonna go in there if I obviously could but like they're gonna like censor us like I can't show you my naked body But only fans coming soon
45:36So I just like I'm having to really focus right now. Wow
45:42How do we feel you look hot I mean beautiful
45:49You look really fucking hot Alex, I'm sorry I mean beautiful I like how it snatches that waist. Yeah, so it's actually a two-piece which I think is super cute You have your corset top and then this a-line ball gown skirt with a high slit Yeah, this is great. Let's just do this. We found it? I think it's great. Let's go. Now we're getting too weird. I literally went in, I tried one dress on. It was a two-piece. Stop. And I walked out and that was the end of it.
46:32okay dress number one i would say this is like a nine out of ten like i don't know i guess a 10 out of 10 i don't know what to compare it to that's why we're gonna try on more dresses daddy gang although again i like i'm we could just leave matt here i come all right i'm going try on different dress all right here we go dress number two part two oh i literally just changed the bottom so still a separate still fitted now we're in a trumpet that last one was a line ball gown now we're in a trumpet mermaid i'm leaning towards the first one over this as much as i like i actually like these two-piece sets your girl loves a sweatsuit She loves some type of two-piece situation, but this even though I do think it looks like makes my body look nice And it's like accentuating my figure because I literally don't have hips So I don't know how it's making me look like I do I don't think I'd be as comfortable in this and as you guys know I am someone that only cares about comfort.
47:32Daddy gang on to the next. See you soon
47:39I'm manifesting that I'm gonna find my person Girl you and me both. Ooh. I can immediately tell this is not something I would naturally try on. Let's see how we like it. Wow, I feel like a fairy. Very soft, very romantic, giving... She Swift vibes. This night is sparkling. It's very not me. If I was gonna wear this, I would have this entire piece cut out. I think that the lower half is cool, how it's like a little see-through. And I like that the back is open. The back like looks cool, but the front, this is not my cut. The other one was giving great tits. This is giving, it's just giving nothing.
48:23But I do feel very pretty and it's a very pretty dress. And I think it could be for one of you out there today. So dial nine, no, I don't, okay, let's go. Okay, call 911. Someone is fucking holding me hostage by my wedding dress shopping. I wish Matt was here. Matt has the best taste. he would just know immediately but you know what this is my decision i can have fucking one decision in my life okay
48:50okay i'm coming i'm coming oh i think the front's fine i think this is actually like giving nothing for me like it just like it's like i would rather it be like so tight these are not comfortable Yeah, I hate this. This is gonna be a no. It's like not tight enough. This is like slouching down and like, it's like, it's kind of fitting in all the wrong places. But I could see me trying another dress a little bit like this. The issue is I can't take my underwear off. And these are supposed to be fucking seamless and they're not. So I'm also not getting the full like long effect of what it would look like without it.
49:29We'll be back.
49:34I'm gonna say a really interesting statement that I didn't think would come out of my mouth. This is like too understated for me. I thought I was gonna be like so okay with like just a slip dress. Like it's so classy pretty but I thought I wanted the most minimal vibe. Let me be so clear because I know I'm talking to a lot of women. This is a gorgeous dress and it's also a gorgeous, like very comfortable situation that's simple. I came in thinking I wanted this type and I'm like, I don't think this is the vibe. Next. Action.
50:21I can tell immediately. I would take a knife and slit this thing right off. The shape of the dress is really pretty. The corset made my body look better. This cut to me is like a lot of anyone's worst enemy. It starts at a low point on your boob and then it goes down. It's just... It's pulling you down. It's pulling me down and I want to be lifted up. I want my boobs hitting my head. I actually surprisingly am liking strapless. Like I think if I keep doing my Pilates... I'm gonna go try a dress on. I'll be right back. Okay. Okay, okay, okay. This is fucking, oh my god, this is crazy. I feel like, I don't even know what I feel like right now this feels like.
51:05I'm a peacock. I'm a swan. A swan. I'm a fucking huge ass swan. Guys, are you getting excited out there? She's a peacock. She's giving. She's giving. Am I the drama? This is interesting. This is so pretty, but again, not for me. I'm happy I tried it on. It's gonna be a no. It's gonna be a hard fucking no. I'll be back. Oh! Listen, I do not want anything on my dress. I don't want flowers, sparkles, any like shape situations going on. Don't look at the pattern, okay? But if you like pattern, again, this has nothing, you know, you can get patterned. Look at it in terms of like, do we like this shape of a dress?
51:56So this is called a drop waist. As I'm learning, I would not want the cut of this at the top. Like this is not flattering to my boobs. I think someone with like smaller boobs, it would look really good on. But I like this to this. Sit with me for a second. I'm feeling hopeful. I think trying on dresses, my biggest fear was that I could potentially feel like, oh I don't like myself in a wedding dress or like oh I'll have like a panic attack also it could be because like I'm high and I'm sitting at this place filming for Call Her Daddy not like thinking thinking about my wedding I think like I'm realizing like thank fucking god I didn't plan this you know thank god I asked my mom last minute because if I had like 15 more fucking minutes I would have canceled the whole thing but now I'm here I'm having fun and we're drinking champagne we smoked a little marijuana and everything's just looking really fucking white I am gonna try on the first dress that I liked the most so far, and I think we were going to put a veil on.
52:55All right, here we go. Woo! And five, six, seven, eight. She's a virgin. Virgin language. It is really pretty. The drama is in the length. The simple adjustment to frame the picture. It's not supposed to be the picture. You in the dress is what we're looking at. I feel like the virgin mother. Look at her.
53:21My mom just goes, well, you're not. Okay, mom. I'm a, I'm a born again virgin. Something I just learned. This is technically not the one, obviously, where the dad can unveil his virgin little girl. This is more just for aesthetic, obviously. I'm not fucking putting this over my whole fucking head. I'm going to be real. It doesn't feel natural. I don't, as I'm saying that, know why the fuck it would. but I don't know who walks around with a veil on all the time. But I think that I'm sure like some maybe women like put it on and they're like, oh my God, it doesn't feel complete without it. I'm having a hard time taking myself seriously because it just feels like, like it's so bridey, which maybe that's a good thing.
54:05I don't know. Yeah, I'm a bride. You're right. Thank you for reminding me that. I am going to be a bride. I want to practice if I can sit. Because like what I do know is I like this option because I feel, oh look, you're just going to see my whole vagina the whole night. I'm like, woo, Matt, woo, Matt, woo. No underwear all night. This is pretty fucking good to sit in. I'm still snatched fully breathing out because the belly's here. Oh. The belly's not here. The belly's sitting. I look like I'm about to get there. The belly is right here. And so the snatch is coming in like the location that has nothing to do with drinking you're eating So I feel like I would be really able to like feel Confident and comfortable be my guest be my guest.
54:51How do you go to the bathroom? You just oh my god
54:59Backwards and face it so your train doesn't go in the way. Oh, that's so smart. So you would just go like this this is what i else got there we go wow and now you're not peeing your dress this is by far like yeah the vibe i think because i haven't pictured myself getting married i was leaning more into that being like i want it to be so so simple in terms of just like a slip dress or something but i think because i can't right now picture myself still like getting married and i haven't thought about this a lot. I think I needed something a little bit more like this to be like, oh yes, like I am a bride and I'm not just going like to a dinner.
55:41And I don't hate the veil. My plan right now is like continuing to try as many on like throughout the next couple months. So I'm gonna continue to get myself more comfortable in doing this, but right now from this session, this is the dress that I love.
56:04I walked in here having an idea of what dress I wanted. Like I had a picture and I went with the complete opposite of what I walked in with. I know so many women are watching this, including myself. And we are looking at Instagram and we're comparing ourselves to what we're seeing of like, wait, but I want her dress. You guys, you literally couldn't have told me I would be liking that dress the most. if you tried like I I would have said no I don't even I wouldn't even have probably tried it on like a two-piece set thing so I also would say stop you can look at inspiration on Instagram but stop looking be like but I want to look like that or I want to have that because the minute you're trying something on your confidence is going to come in something maybe you didn't anticipate and just go with it because I'm like if I'm feeling good that's all I want to feel on my wedding day we were just speaking in the dressing room the woman that works here has been so amazing and she's so good at making you just feel so great about yourself but I was asking like what is your experience like do a lot of people cry in these experiences and she was like absolutely she was like you actually came with a really great sized group today because when you have too many people in a room and you're walking out and you either one feel amazing and then there's too big of a group that's not like being sensitive enough of like wait she's coming out in a dress and they're all like no not that one and you loved it like that's so upsetting and like deflates your confidence or you walk out and you hate it but you have like a grandmother or a mom or a friend that's like I love it and you feel like pressured into liking something that maybe you absolutely hate it was so important the group that I brought today like we were talking obviously about being really particularly like who you're inviting to your wedding who are you involving in things like this that are gonna make you feel great so I don't think anyone should bring someone just because you're afraid their feelings are going to hurt they're not invited who do you want around you to make you feel the best you can feel and I think a lot of it obviously comes down to like as women we're constantly everyone's just fixating on our looks and our bodies and no one's really looking at the groom and it's like I think for women listening you really have to you'll feel it when you like that dress and don't listen to any fucking one but yourself obviously if you like trust your friends listen but like you know what I mean like you'll have that gut feeling of like I feel good in this I want to wear this at my wedding I want to like I want to dance I'm gonna feel confident I'm not gonna be having to like suck in or like feel like I look bad in a picture like bitch you're having the time of your life tonight you're not trying to like worry about what you look like because you're gonna look amazing no matter what you're wearing the moral of the story is don't put too much pressure on this shit like I'm so fucking happy that I randomly decided to just film an episode and then i ended up being like wait maybe i just found the exact style that i'm looking for thank you for coming with me this is just the beginning this is the first conversation about the wedding that we had let me know if you liked it hopefully the next time i talk to you i have way more fucking answers on what i'm doing with my life and my wedding specifically maybe we'll have to postpone it five years because i'll just keep changing the location ma i love you so much i will see you fuckers next one say goodbye Thank you.
From the publisher
Step into the chaos that is Alex's wedding planning saga. She fully details her struggle to lock down a wedding location (hint: So far it has changed 7 times). Daddy Gang, you’ve asked and Alex is answering. Bridesmaids or no bridesmaids? Is she going big or keeping it low-key? Alex is taking a very non-traditional approach to her wedding and has the shocking revelation that she will be walking herself down the aisle, and her reasoning may not be what you'd expect. But that's not all—Alex makes a wild in-the-moment decision to go wedding dress shopping and takes you (and Mother Cooper!) along for the journey…but only after getting high as fuck. Will Big Al say yes to the dress? Enjoy!
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