Stassi Schroeder: A Proud Basic Bitch (FBF)

0:02What is up daddy gang? It is your founding father Alex Cooper with call her daddy.

0:15finally we did it we did it we're here how's your mic feeling um what do you mean i can't hear myself well you but you like is it close enough oh i mean it's fine listen normally i do it with headphones so you're it's a little mind fucky so yeah so i don't feel like i'm doing a real podcast right now we be doing headphones no i look so much better like this you look great i used to do headphones and i was like it's giving like more ogre vibe because it's just like so well i'm like just calling you an ogre because you wear headphones in your pockets but you know what i'm saying no it does but i feel like i can't well i'm not leading this podcast you are i can't lead properly if i can hear other things oh okay like do you have adhd i you're like no i mean i used to be addicted to adderall but i think i was just abusing it i don't think i actually like no doctor prescribed me adderall i did it myself i did it that's fair i just realized I didn't even introduce you Stassi Schroeder welcome to call her daddy thank you I'm so excited no like I know everyone says that but I'm ridiculously excited and this room is so chic I'm just so obsessed with the color of this the way it just these used to be orange and I got them in here and I was like this needs to immediately change like you don't feel call her daddy vibes from this what is that noise a fucking plane okay sorry sorry no because there has been something happening with our air conditioner recently that it sounds oh it's And then I don't focus.

1:36That's probably I should be wearing headphones. How did you pick your outfit today? We were just talking about this. Okay, wait, no, I have to tell you this, okay? Because I haven't stressed out this much about a fucking outfit. I can't even tell you. It was harder to pick an outfit for this right now than it is to like go on tour, go on a red carpet, fancy outfits. Because let me explain. Okay. I want to match your vibe. You know, I'm not here to like act like I'm going to some fancy gala. But you could. While you're wearing sweatpants and a t-shirt. But Alex, not everyone looks as cute as you do in sweatpants as a t-shirt.

2:14And when you're pregnant and you feel like you look like a beast, it's extra hard. So like it would have been easier for me to just like really like find a nice dress or outfit that's chic and nice and cool. Like maybe like, you know, a little bit businessy. I don't know, whatever. but this these are literally i think this is like ten dollars from h &m i think it's good no i'm not getting maternity leggings walked in and i said i literally didn't notice you were pregnant for a second like i have questions about you being pregnant but i forgot and i'm not just gassing you up like i think you look pregnant like pregnant women everywhere need to hear that you know what if you see a pregnant woman on the street just be like you didn't even look pregnant like you didn't even like it took me a while to realize that's what we want to hear it's true and like the outfit is great because you were worried like am i sitting like can you see my belly first of all like let it rock but also it's because you're wearing all black you can't really see it that's what i'm here and the chairs are like also who gives a fuck you're pregnant that's amazing i know but i'm not one of those who i wish i was one of those women like rihanna that like you know wears that has her belly out i'm like god she looks so good there's so many women that look so great like that i've never felt that way i feel best when i'm in bags you know well this bag is looking phenomenal today thank you so you're pregnant how are you feeling honestly i feel really good because this pregnancy isn't during it feels like it's my first pregnancy because my first one was during covid so i wasn't allowed to leave my house got it you know what i mean so i'm able to live my life this time around i'm able to work i'm able to travel i'm able to go to restaurants you know you probably didn't have anyone being like super sweet to you and like holding the door no i never got that experience i never got no and that is like a rite of passage as a pregnant woman to be treated like a fucking queen wow and you didn't get that now i'm getting it so i'm just like feeding off of that energy you know okay i do love that for you because i do i agree with you pregnancy and covid obviously probably had pros of like you don't have to leave the house you can just yeah so when you did look like a beast it didn't matter no one was there but i'm sure your husband still loved you so much he says he did oh like we're not divorced yet so how does he handle your pregnancy like what does he like when you're pregnant I mean he really is great like he I really did luck out with that but he can't like he says that he's like I give you compliments all the time I tell you how beautiful you are I want to have sex with you all the time I'm always coming after you and I'm like it doesn't matter I need to hear those things from other women I need to hear I look beautiful from other women I need the compliments from other women he tries so hard to make me feel good about myself and of course I want my husband to desire me and want me and think I'm beautiful and all of those things but there's just something about a compliment from another woman that really is what like feeds my soul that's what keeps me going no i get what you're saying it's like there's a difference between like men objectifying us we're like we get it and like obviously some men also like love when women are pregnant too no beau's like that oh so beau is like i look i wish i could i mean i'm yeah you talk about sex a lot yeah i don't know why don't wait i don't know why this is brain fog this morning america sorry sorry brain fog no it's okay no he's like i want to like I love your pregnant body.

5:40It's so sexy. I love when you change in front of me. I love all this. And I just feel gross. So I'm just like, no. I mean, thank God. Because imagine if he was somebody who didn't like a pregnant body. Which that is actually something I've thought about. I've heard women say he really just wasn't into the pregnancy thing. And in my mind, I'm like, I don't know if I could be with a partner that doesn't at least fucking fake it. But I guess you could probably tell if they fake it. You totally would be able to tell. like my partner I don't even I'm not pregnant and I pray to God I can get pregnant but like if I get pregnant all he talks about is like oh my god like I don't know how I'm gonna control myself and I'm like what what like yes but only but see at least you have that so like it doesn't matter what what side effect like pregnancy side effects you have like he will still be so into you but at the same time it's a burden because I don't feel sexual whatsoever at all that's like I was gonna ask you like how do you handle like I think women are great online that talk about their pregnancy but there's a little too much glamorization from what I've heard from some moms of like it's not all fucking great and sometimes you feel like shit about yourselves and sometimes it's like not the sexiest that you're feeling and so like can you talk about the real shit of like how are you feeling with your sex life oh my god no my sex I literally have zero sex drive but I will say that I am a champion and I take one for the team in my household and I don't let it go like a week and a half like I will if I've if it's like a week and you know three days I'm like I should probably do this like I'm being selfish right now no but I think that's so relatable and I feel like people don't like to talk about that of like sometimes you gotta just and it's different if you're like hooking up with a random guy and you're like I guess I have to sleep with him no no this is your husband it's your relationship sometimes you're like I'm aware I have no sex drive I still love you and I'm attracted and I want him to feel good about himself and it does bond us it's like once we do it I'm like oh I'm so glad I did this I should do this more isn't that the worst with sex you're like if sometimes you're too in your head or you have no sex drive that month or whatever it is you're like I literally can't even get myself there I know I love him but like I'm not there and then afterwards you're like we should do that more and they're like fuck you I know fuck you I literally ask you all the time sometimes it just takes like going through the act Yes, 100%.

7:56Yes. Okay, do you have like an alter ego when you're pregnant? This is how I think of myself. Okay. When I'm pregnant, I feel like I'm Santa. I'm not joking. I just feel like this round, jolly being. Like, what is your alter ego? So I'm Santa. Through and through. Like, don't get it for real. Like, I look in the mirror and I'm like, everything's round and I'm just jolly. and I'm just you know I'm so excited about the baby that that like and I'm sober so like you don't I don't get depressed that easily when I'm pregnant right right you're not like having the up and down of like getting hammered one night waking up like regretting your life backing up you are like the queen of OOTDs thank you like I I remember literally like back in the day like everyone would start hashtagging it but you really like owned it you're like this is my motherfucking outfit of the day I bought a national holiday it's what a waste of money yeah honestly say that's so cringe you actually bought it you have to buy it you don't just get to like own holidays for free Alex like how much did it cost is this gonna be embarrassing it's so embarrassing I think it was like forty thousand dollars no it it was no it's so embarrassing and you guys I would not do it again okay I would never just throw away that money to have a holiday but at the time I was like oh this is good branding I was just in like business mode my book was coming out I'm like I think that this is good branding so it's like I'm putting money into my career that's how I felt but no I mean hold on what exactly that feels like when people buy like a fucking star in the sky can't we all just honestly like that one's like what day is it it's it's June 30th okay and it's not like on all of our calendars like Apple didn't upload like so how do we even know you own it like what was the point of buying well so can I tell you something that like you own it for a year and I didn't know that and so the next year came around and they were like all right you gotta pay for it again or like the dude I think it was just the same amount of money I'm like you're out of your fucking mind this is a lifetime commitment that you think I'm gonna spend this every year so now technically I think on the list if you were to like search the list my name isn't even up there anymore but everyone on Instagram it's already been hashtagged and and all of that do you really think you had to buy it they thought i would like honestly alex i like 40 000 i'm so embarrassed i'm so embarrassed i'm so embarrassed no wait i think it's i don't care if people come for me because like i deserve to be come for i agree but i think it also gives though a little bit of credit to like you really were committed and like you are to the oot i also just can't believe it was 40 000 for a year yeah no a year maybe not the best business decision no but i respect it you loved it you know who i respect the people who came up with this business i i was the people who are just who are like you know what i'm gonna own a national social media calendar how does one get the authority and were you just like a little miss like googling like how do i get my own day and like i think i asked like my agents or my publicist and i was like how do i find my own holiday and they were like i want one okay well this does go give you credibility why I don't know I just feel like you that gives you some type of credibility like in the fashion world like you're giving like you're you're dedicated first of all the fashion world they don't say OOTD no you're right you are I just literally ostracized myself from the right you're like never getting invited to any 100 % but you like fashion I love it yeah okay what clothing staple did you used to wear that you would not be caught dead in now like what's something that you were like oh I fucking love this shit now you're like huh statement necklaces I wrote so hard for statement I remember that you know what they will come back again not in the way that I wore them before but I mean like they weighed me down like they were it was like they were battle like to wear into battle like the plates of armor like it was it's insane if you look back on like Vanderbilt's interviews I'm like who how did I I think that that like your whole chest that it was that was the outfit but it will come back that's what like I I was gonna ask you like what's a trend that you're like so not into but I don't really care about trends because I'm like it always comes back yeah it's not an actual trend it's like this is fashion and it's just what's in what's not sure but like it's gonna come back it does it always comes back and you know now I'm to the point god I love Gen Z I really do I really appreciate them because they have this like anything goes mentality about fashion and clothing that I just really fucking love because I feel like while they do follow trends they don't at the same time it's kind of like just express yourself and wear what you feel comfortable and what you like and and I've found what I what looks I like and whether they're dated or not I kind of don't care and Gen Z gave me permission so you know what I agree with that because I feel like back in the day when I was growing up if you didn't have like the double popped Abercrombie polo with like the oh yeah and like the denim skirt and the leggings and then you're like you're a loser who were nobody exactly you were a loser you weren't in the in crowd and so like i remember begging my mom like i know this is so expensive but like this is literally for my social equity like i'm not going to be respected on dress down days if i can't wear this 100 no one actually cares that much anymore no one cares you can get away with so much and what a glorious time to live you're right and everyone loves the dupe like everyone's like down for like if it's real actually people are like that's like nasty yeah like why are you spending yeah like why are you buying national holidays like that's but that's giving the same energy wait can I just say this yeah okay so when you were in Milan you were there for Prada right yeah I was just talking to my hair and makeup person about this I was like Alex and Prada is such a good like mix and vibe and relationship you are such a good Prada girly so like I hope that that like keeps going that keeps going and just like builds into just like something bigger because that was like I would not have thought that neither until I saw your phone either me they're saucy well because I just see you just being casual and everything but then I saw you in your looks and I'm like yes I really appreciate that because I will say I was nervous because I too never envisioned like what fashion house would I like jive with the most yeah and when I found the Prada moment it felt so mean I actually felt so comfortable and confident which like I never fucking going into these type events feel confident because I'm like I'm a poser like I don't wear this shit all the time yeah but now Prada I've started to like buy my own shit from Prada and be like I actually feel like if I'm dressing up Prada feels right for me no it does so I appreciate that really fit well I loved it this is like a really random fact that I learned on Selling Sunset and I don't know if it's true for everyone so I need to ask you this okay on Selling Sunset there was a woman that's pregnant and it was her first time being pregnant right and she was asking advice from other moms and the other mom was like oh by the way girl like yeah you can't shave your v after like a certain amount of time no i can't see i'm i go rogue no literally like this morning i just i guess you just guess i literally feel around and i'm like so you okay that's good to know so like you actually can't see it but then that woman was like so i just didn't touch it i don't i think it'd be way too itchy for me and then she was like or have your man do it oh no i wouldn't i i don't trust any no i don't trust him with a razor that just does not sound enjoyable no you can't see at a certain point you can't you just have to feel for it yeah i can't grow it out it's way too itchy right because that's what i was thinking like at least if you're if you can't see your vagina over the belly you're at least gonna go rogue but like you'll just you're not getting it completely bald you're just getting it down to a place where you're comfortable that you're not itchy I mean I try to get it but I try to do as well.

15:48And you're just like you can't see shit. I can't see shit. I mean we've done it for so long that like. That's true. It's like muscle memory. No that's true. I do have a lot of women that still write in that are like can you like give us a tutorial on like how to shave and I'm like girls like let's let's not. It's like really easy. Like this show you can come here for a lot of things but like I feel like you can like look it up somewhere and like we don't need to go that. Okay and if like you're pregnant doing it like someone with that's not pregnant and you can see that shit like just take your time no excuse yeah okay you have written two new york times bestsellers congratulations you little brainiac over there it is really exciting when i hear it when i hear other people say it i'm like god like you know we all suffer from imposter syndrome i feel like all of us yeah we all do it's like well you know i wouldn't have that if i wasn't on the show and blah blah blah and i wouldn't have that if this didn't happen but like you know no that's really fucking cool yeah it's no it is really cool and i think it's also amazing that you've done two now well I'm working on my third right now yeah we how long does it take you to write a book a long time I worked on the proposal six months six months I worked and it wasn't like that for my second book and like my first book actually came a lot quicker to me also this third one it's it's harder because like I'm I'm really trying to be the way that I write It's like I have to be specific about like with one thesis like and then everything spiders from that.

17:17And I'm just like struggling. I was struggling a little bit with what that was. So it took me a really long time just to do the proposal. Well, I was going to say like I think there's so many people in Hollywood that have like that one book and they're like peace out. I just wanted to say I wrote a book. Clearly you like really like doing this. Oh, no, I love it. And that's why I started like for the first one. And I was like, I want it to be a handbook so that if I wanted to keep going, the theme could change. So it's always still like a basic bitch handbook to something. It's just depending on what's going on in my life.

17:49It's such a good idea. And so I want to play a game. OK, so the whole like basic bitch handbook. Clearly, first question is, can you help us all decipher what is the difference or is there a difference between Chugi and basic? okay well personally okay what i think um i think chuggy is kind of cringe it's like you know like cringe clothing or cringe you know things that i don't know there's a cringe element to chuggy i personally think that anything that's basic it's just like leaning in so hard to something that you really love and doing that unapologetically it's like if you really love rom-coms or if you really love murder docs and just like leaning in and it's like oh god you're so basic but like but it makes me happy it brings me joy it's like leaning into the things that like really bring you joy and not giving a fuck if it's like what's cool basic to me kind of is a timeless situation where like basic also means that a lot of people though are doing it and it's just something that kind of is timeless yeah and it's and there's a reason those things are popular like because they feel good or they make you happy or like i don't know they fucking spark joy so like i'm santa i love being basic santa over here you're like i can say it you can't say it alex

19:24okay we're playing a game you're gonna tell me if it's basic or not okay and also you can just give me your thoughts on the topic in itself okay number one aperol spritz are you that's the most basic no it's my favorite drink of the whole world i crave it every day that's the worst part of pregnancy the worst part is that i can't have multiple aperol spritzes all day every day dude okay i make bow make them so i'm like i'm gonna have three sips and i literally swish it around my mouth for as long as I can spit it out no I swallow it my baby can handle a few sips of an Amaral spritz but like I literally swish it and hold it in there and I'm like oh that felt good that feels good that feels good I love them so much and I think people consider them basic but I think they're great so that's great okay get ready with me videos oh my god so I didn't know what this was and I'm a big TikTok fan okay okay okay and all of a sudden I just kept seeing g-r-w-m everywhere and I was like grown woman I literally was like what the fuck is everybody writing grown woman like what is this stuff because not all get ready with me videos look the same they weren't all makeup some of them are like picking outfits so like there was no theme right away and most of the time it's a woman doing it yes so like I thought grown woman was the vibe and like it took me like a few months to realize I feel like that it was get ready with me and this is the thing I tried one I put one out like three weeks ago and how to do on I feel like the kids loved it although I will say everyone was commenting being like wow 2016 no and I'm like oh wait I was trying to do a thing you know I was really trying to do a get ready with me and everyone's like this is so nostalgic you do your makeup like it's 2016 but I'm like that's because it works for me right who cares at least you're not trying to like pretend you're in a generation you're not yeah like you know putting the like foundation like letting it drop on your face and like i i can't i can't get i can't fuck with that like it kills me every get ready with me that i see that people are just dropping the liquid on their face like it's so it's so not appealing wait how do you do it i don't do it like me you drop it no no i don't i don't i'm just interested like how do you do it okay well i take my foundation and i have a tin and i pour some them out and then I in your hand no on a tin okay and then I use a brush or a sponge and like a normal fucking person and then do the damn thing do you think they're on to something that we don't know though no I don't either I think they're bored and I think that they're just coming up with new ways to do makeup when like what works already is there so like I don't get it the fact that you thought that it was grown woman no listen Alex I also got a lot lot of comments from people being like i thought the same thing so there are lots of millennial women out there who are thinking that it is grown woman i get it grwm grown woman how would anyone just automatically know get ready with me what what about gr makes you think grown good point i i like it i think it's funnier i think we should start leaning in and be like grown woman video coming right at you okay tom tom basic not basic you know what i'm gonna say but i i think it's basic but like I again I love things that are basic but like you can't get any more basic than like the the representation of Vanderpump rules in bar form true you go there I don't really because I'm asking for attention if I go there do you know what I mean like I really love it and I'll go there if it's someone's birthday so I'm going for someone yeah you know what I mean but if I go there everyone's gonna take photos and and I'm like no I'm not I get it I get it um ozempic oh my god we have to like i really want to try it when i give birth you're like i want to go on it now but i am pregnant so i'm gonna wait no the amount of times i've researched this being like i mean i think it's safe and healthy like i think it's good for you it's like taking vitamins stassi i how do we put a disclaimer be like nothing that was said in this podcast medically please do not listen to this but like come on it's basic anyone who hears about ozempic has to fucking be curious you are a liar if you tell me that you have not thought about it i thought about jumping on that train i mean not you don't need it i don't mean you but like you should think about it i get what you're saying i think it's this is what i've started to realize and maybe it's just like with age like i remember one of my things on here was bone broth and i was thinking about the all the debate with gwyneth when everyone was like you are like promoting bad eating that like for people that's not realistic and whatever and i'm like why does everyone care no like she didn't say to only eat bone broth for you she was just being honest would you rather lie her story she's literally just she's trying to be transparent which is what everybody is asking of people please be honest and transparent so then you can't get mad about what you hear right when someone is being transparent or honest so have i googled ozempic and what it would be like and am I thinking about it yes I am because you were just talking about bone broth my first pregnancy I ate bone broth for dinner for six fucking months after I gave birth and I kind of don't feel like doing that again I love that for you I'm like I don't want to I want a quickie I want to know that yes I'm an ozempic girl not a bone broth yeah we love that I love the honesty because that's what I I got annoyed where I was like I think people are really getting too triggered like Gwyneth wasn't like everyone should do this she was asked what she eats in a day and instead of being like a cheeseburger for dinner and she just told you you don't have to do it you don't have to do it like would you want her to lie to you and then you're gonna wonder like wait why don't I look like this when I'm eating a cheeseburger for dinner and like you you want it I want to know that it's a struggle for Gwyneth I want to know it's a struggle me too and I also love it's like people need to realize I know the whole world influencer has really taken over but like look inward if you're being really heavily influenced by every single influencer on the internet yeah let's totally just a little check yes just a little check in just be responsible for yourself you're responsible for yourself okay so ozempic ozembe okay so she's gonna go on ozempic you're gonna tell us how it goes you'll go on it someone else doesn't have to exactly okay yeah and then you're gonna be feel how you want to feel and they can feel how they want to feel while they're on the elliptical you're gonna look at me now do you think you'll be promoting it that like you're on it or you won't talk about it um i would like to to think that i would be somebody that promotes it and talks about it because again i really do i love when other people are transparent and honest so i want to be that for other people but like god people are really hard people are really hard on on that on things like that and it's like do i feel like going through all of the hate that i'm gonna get well if i'm honest about it unfortunately you're on caller daddy right now saying you're gonna do it you know what would be the worst if if you actually don't go on a zembic and you're like everyone in the gym and they're like that bitch is on a zembic you're like no guys i'm actually i totally probably just fucked myself right no matter what they're all either they're like it's not working or it's working and you could have been doing it like organically yeah okay well keep us updated what do you think about manifesting i'm so basic you manifest i manifest the shit out of life i think i've naturally been manifesting my whole life and just like not know when we were growing up manifesting wasn't a word that we like really yeah the way that we use it now totally but i think that i've always just been that way and i really i really do fucking ride so hard for manifesting because I feel like what works with manifesting is like you just envision that the things that you want are going to happen and then you slowly start working towards those things whether you realize it or not true and like that is manifesting it's like quite simple that's true okay give us an example what's something like big you manifested and like boom it happened my whole entire life I wanted um to live in a Spanish style home in the hills okay okay and I when it got to the point where I was looking at at houses like it just so seamlessly happened and I realized that like wow I had been like planning for this and working towards this and I'd always just said it and then I was like I should have manifested bigger I should have been like a 10 million dollar house Spanish style house in the Hollywood Hills like why didn't I manifest a yard attached to that house like fuck I get what you're saying but like okay so you had this vision and now it's come true yes because then I like I saved the money in order like I started like or I would accept this job and put that money away to like start right being like this is gonna happen for me so I need to prepare for it when it does so kind of like back in the days they would just say like a dream you have yeah but now we have like a better word that's like a little bit more like proactive basic as fuck okay are you watching reality tv shows um well I've just recently started watching Vanderbilt Rules.

28:39Dude were you not watching it? No. And then you had to catch up. And then once um Scanwell happened I was like I gotta catch up. I got I didn't catch up but like I will I've I've seen like the last three episodes so like I've been like I should probably I'm interested I want to see. That whole drama I can't imagine how annoying it was for you because like how many people wanted to hear your take on it? No you you have no idea. In fact like it's interesting that you say that that you can see that that you can see that that would maybe be annoying like when it happened like it's like one of those things I joke about this that like you know it's like when there's like a natural disaster or a world event and like you never forget where you were that day and like you could be at work or at school and then like you stop what you're doing and like you you get with your co-workers you find the nearest fucking tv and then years later you're like I'll never forget who I was with and what we were doing that's how I feel about fucking scannaval like truly i can't imagine like and what was your take well at first i was just like i i don't think that this is real but then i'm like this is i start texting the people that i i know obviously and i was like like i mean just like i think everyone's the same as everyone's reaction like holy fuck and then i i was like i feel like i'm thrown right back into something that I've been away from yeah for so long but it's it's like is it my place to be a part of it or is it not my place I don't know and then I have all of these people just dming me I mean I've never been dmed more about anything than I was about like I'm in or commenting and attaching or tagging me and it being like I'm gonna need Stassi to weigh in I'm gonna need Stassi to weigh in I'm like but I don't know if it's my place anymore and I've been out of this for so long that like I think it would be kind of fucking weird if I'm like going on my Instagram being like this is my take on yeah and like it was all it was it's been kind of like a mindfuck which is weird to say because it's not even happening to me I kind of agree and I that's what when I when I had Ariana on I was like it was actually so weird because the amount of people that were like fuck like we kind of wanted you to have Raquel on and I was like this is why I also hate the internet so much because whenever I have villains on the show everyone's like canceled when i don't have them on then they're pissed but when i have them on they're pissed whatever but did you ever like tom sandoval no i mean no and he never liked me and that's the thing you know i will say this not being on this last season it's like my my talents were wasted because i could have you know this was when i could have really just like given it to him and been like i've always knew right right there's got to be something that everyone is seeing in him but like he i feel like has always been a slime ball well that's interesting that you say that just because i felt like he was always so beloved and so and i would even i would say to my producers i'm like when is he gonna get the edit that like i i feel like the rest of us see like why does he keep like getting away with being just this dude who just wants to like give people things and help people out man and like all of that i'm like that's not what i'm seeing i'm seeing somebody who's constantly put like blaming others for things and dredging things up from the past and like and just deflecting constantly yeah like if like the rest of us look bad then he looks good and right and I've always felt that way and so yeah you know the fact that I'm not on it this season it's like fuck you know yeah do you miss reality tv I miss reality tv at times like I loved filming I love like that was it was like all my 20s were spent doing that and you know I love the camaraderie of it and I loved all my producers and the team and the cat like it's fun it's really fun but you know there's something about like being out of it for so long and and I watched it like the success of a show is like directly tied to how badly the cast hurts each other and that like feels weird I agree it's like I think that's something that we're struggling with now is like watching it because there is social media I I feel like people are having a harder time like actually choosing a villain because it's also weird of like but then that person's life is actually ruined on social media and people are getting canceled and people are getting death threats where like back in the day you kind of like the never saw the people and it was like whoa that was a great show where now it's like a little bit like oh people have to be really calculated to fuck shit up and like how how far are people going to ruin each other's lives and is it honest is it real like i don't know yeah it just it's weird it's dark like when you really think about it it's fucking dark right like i feel like there's a i think you have a good life now outside of it it's almost better to be nostalgic for it than be still in it and like look what's happening right now no i i think so too because i i think you know obviously i get asked all the time like would you go back to reality tv would you go back to vanderpump rules all that stuff and i'm like i don't i you know there might come a time when I'm like oh this makes sense this type of reality tv this makes sense for me or whatever and this is a reflection on what really my life is like yeah you know it might be a little more boring than what you're used to seeing right but it's at least a little bit more authentic where you're not having to like really create that character again yeah but like I don't think I'd want to put my family in a position to be in something where like again the success is tied to like how much you can hurt each other and like i just don't i don't it's not like a healthy place to be like it's not good on relationships you can be in the strongest relationship and and i mean if you think about it it's like vanderpump rules is like who's betraying who who's cheating on who who's being shady and like sometimes they you know they things are invented that like never even happened and so to put that stress on a relationship and then if you have children on top of that i'm just not sure that that's like the healthiest thing for me i do miss it no i do i get it like it's almost like reality tv to a certain age should be appropriate because you actually your life is toxic and chaotic like season one it was like you were so like in the best way unhinged and like saying shit but like i was like that with my boyfriends when i was in my late like early 20s then i think when you get to a certain age it's like how you're just fucking your life up yeah for camera yes yeah who are you friends with still from the cast well katie's one of my best friends in the world she's um hartford's godmother and she was my maid of honor and i'm still really close with lala and honestly the producers like i'm i hang out with the producers more than most people like they're some of my closest friends really yeah so it's so weird to like be hanging out with them and we kind of don't talk about it that much yeah you know what i mean like the show part of it but now that like scantamall's happened it would talk about it a lot more I guess how do you feel about how much hate Tom is getting online um I mean I've obviously I've been in a position where I've received so much hate before and like that's I I don't like where we're at like in society we're like that's how we punish people it's like I said it's like it's like emotionally beheading people yeah you know what I mean and it's and who's to decide what the punishment should be like who who makes someone the authority on that like what makes this person on their computer the authority on on what they think is enough hate for him to receive right I don't get down with that like I really I don't like it like do I like Tom Sandoval no do I think what like what he did is disgusting and like fuck him but like I see now I feel like I'm even adding to it like the online vitriol but there's a level of like if you're being asked about it you can talk about it and I think everyone with their friends can talk about it but I do think there's like a level of we're just as bad of like people that are going out of their way to comment on his photos or something and be like go fucking kill yourself you're so disgusting it's like that it's like that that that no one like let's let's just like not do that as like a group of people let's just not you probably didn't say that fully to like even your dad when he cheated on your mom and you guys have a divorced family now like there's so many people that have gone through sadly something very similar like cheating affairs like that and it's awful but like we don't know these people so yes they put their lives out there for us but like at what point is it like talk shit to your friends in your group chat but to actually make an effort to like go wait outside of his house or to go make comments it's like let's and at some again at some point like that is how people become incredibly depressed and then suicidal and it's like how would we all react if we knew that that's how it ended one of yes yeah how what it just it's not right you were obviously so different back in the day as we all are of like in your early 20s versus where you're sitting now on the show you were probably one of my favorite characters because it was like I was watching a scene this morning I was trying to I was like telling my friend I was gonna sit down with you I'm like no you don't understand like no one was more iconic than Stassi like she would go into these like rage blackouts basically that looked like it on screen where you were just like I am the devil motherfucker and like just the shit you said was like so gold and I'm like are you gonna ever let your daughter watch the show I can't I can't hide it from her forever like so of course I honestly just hope she learns from my mistakes like I hope she sees it and cringes and is like you were fucking awful and like I don't want to talk to you for two weeks and I'm like fair and then she just literally goes you know that just swings her in the opposite direction and she just wants to be this like lovely kind child but like that's fair you know okay how would you describe yourself back then versus now to someone maybe that didn't watch the show didn't know yeah oh my god I mean oh my god I think so incredibly selfish like I still have selfish tendencies like 100 that's always gonna be a personality trait sorry it is but like I really truly thought the world revolved around me I thought that everything that I was going through mattered to everyone I just felt like what I had to say was so important I was also one of those people that's like I just tell it like it is you got to just deal with it and and now that I'm older like I don't like that about myself and I think that's such an overrated quality because all you're saying is like you don't care about how your words affect other people so like sometimes like it's good to just think before you fucking speak you know it's like called being polite and gracious true like I just like and there are still people that like you know are in that reality TV world that are still like that that are just like well I tell like it is I'm honest like if you can't handle the truth and like I'm not for you and I'm like but do you really want to be that way I get what you're saying about like holding yourself back for maybe speaking about certain things but again the environment that you were in like that is what would make you a better person on reality tv yeah no so it's like like it's almost like you were rewarded when you would say crazy shit I was now it's like when you're in private with friends maybe we don't bring that into real life but I get what you're saying of watching it back you're like why did I say that's how I feel about when I look back at my the earlier days of my show I'm like why did I say some of that stuff yeah that's also life yeah no that's true but we just happen to be like recording our yes and we were rewarded for it just like you were rewarded for like things that would come out of your mouth it's like that's that's how we're paid to be totally like to say crazy shit yes what do you miss most about being in your 20s being selfish leaning into it like right and like not knowing that it was wrong right you know like it's not yet it's the delusion it's like the not knowing any better and just really living for myself but at the same time it's like I am such a happier person not living for myself yeah like as like fun as it all was to be reckless and selfish like I am so much more at peace and such a happier person yeah now that I'm not like that I get what you're saying like I was thinking about that as I wrote that question today I was thinking like okay I oh I am 28 but I almost feel like I'm already 30 and I am like my earlier stages of my 20s I feel like I thought I was having so much fun in the toxic relationships and going out and drinking getting fucked up and blacking out and like jokingly waking up and having all my friends in the room be like I just ruined my life and that's also like life but there is some different level of peace you feel once you get over that hump where like I don't wake up with that anxiety of like what did I say to that person like was I like mean like did I fuck up like did I do something like I don't know it's like calmer it's like nicer I mean there's like a reason that like you know elderly people are like my idea of fun is like staying in in like watching like Downton Abbey it's like because our preferences change as we age and like I agree with that staying in watching downtown abbey is like the most fun you can have do you often hang out with elderly folks like i should honestly i should find myself a pack of elderly friends they like come over one night and there's like seven people that you just like went and picked up from the elderly home i mean i'm always down for granny vibes i do love granny vibes too um What do you love most about being in your 30s?

42:03In my 30s. Oh, my gosh. I think that I've learned that like the power of saying no to things and not caring about like, well, if someone can be mad at me if I'm not going to what they just asked me to do or if I say no to like a FaceTime or like I don't respond to a text message. Like I've prioritized as much as like I it's funny that I'm saying this because it sounds like I'm being selfish but I've just prioritized my my happiness and well-being and I I know how to do that and not worry about like well so-and-so gonna be mad at me if I say no like I'm allowed to say no I'm allowed to say no yeah you are I love that too because there's like I get what you're saying it sounds selfish but there's a different level of maturity of like a freedom that you get instead of feeling like oh my god but it has to be calculated if I don't text them it's because I'm like being mean this is actually I'm not being mean I'm not being mean I'm just There's just things that I don't want to do.

42:58Yeah, I'm just kind of busy and I don't want to do that. Or like I'd like to stay home with my daughter tonight. Like I just like it's not for me. And honestly, I don't even owe an explanation. No. Like knows all I have to say. What's the difference between Stassi hammered in her 20s versus Stassi hammered in her 30s? Oh my God, I miss being hammered. I know. How much longer? I'm due the beginning of September. That's a wild. It's like three fucking months. You got this. Ew. You got this. Um, well, I would fully black out in my 20s. Like I wouldn't remember things and and and I yeah, I wouldn't remember what I texted.

43:36I wouldn't remember what I said. It was super emotional. Now, because I have a kid, I'm not allowed. Right. I can't. It's unfortunate, but I can't let it get too far. So like I honestly I feel like I don't have that much of like a personality shift with I drink. Does that make me an alcoholic? Maybe. but I feel like I'm kind of the same as I am right now that's good that's good okay I love that it's just like you have you're just having a little bit better time yeah like I'm just having a better time that's what it is I'm just having a better time in my 30s because like I'm not getting obliterated right you're not getting full blackout that's fair um speaking of being drunk you talk a lot about dark passengering and I think a lot of my fans may not have any idea like what does that mean like can you explain what that means yeah 100 i can't you talk a lot about dark passengering and i think a lot of my fans may not have any idea like what does that mean like can you explain what that means yeah 100 i can i mainly did this i did this like all throughout vanderpump rules but like it's became a thing when i started dating beau okay so i would go absolutely psycho on him like i mean breaking phones texting him 73 times in a row yelling screaming threatening things like violence okay when i wouldn't get my way and normally it was because like i would want to leave a party early because like i granny vibes so like i'd want to go to bed at like 11 and he's so social and he would want to stay out later and I've always had like a trigger when it came to that because like honestly I feel validated now because of Scannaball it's like shady things in that group of friends always happen after hours so I would start freaking out like what is why does he want to be out with my friends and not coming home with me and I would go just insane on him I would I would it was like that's why he would call it the dark passenger it's like I would literally see red like anger is like the only motion that like overtakes me I see red I can't control it I can't stop myself like that is what the dark passenger used to be but again now looking back um in light of like you know Scandaval and all that I was right to dark passenger I was about to say as you were describing that I think it's totally understandable if your partner for like one night occasionally is like oh my gosh like no I'm having so much fun with my friends like I want to stay out if your partner every single fucking time you guys go out is always lingering and you're going home alone biggest red flag you know what strange yeah strange so true why why would you want to stay and not come home with me yeah like what exactly i can't imagine wanting to like i again i get it if like i'm having all my friends are there and my fiance is like i really want to go home exhausted i'm like fuck but like i'm having so much fun with my girlfriends yeah then I'm going to stay out occasionally.

46:43But like, I don't think I've ever been like, I desperately want to stay at this party. I'm not single. I'm not looking for dick. Like the dick I have is going home. Like, why don't I want to just go home with them? Yeah. No, thank you for validating me right now. But don't you think for like a lot of people listening to this probably are like, huh, like I have this a lot with my partner where like they stay out so many more nights than if I'm going home alone or like they're going out without me all the time. Like I guess to each his own, I personally wouldn't be down because I just wouldn't understand like why would your partner always want to be out without you no I completely agree with that and that was always my argument I'd be like so thank you what is it what is it that you want to be doing like what is more fun than just like going to sleep with me right now and I also get the trigger of like if you have ever been cheated on or again and that's what would happen like you know when Kristen and Jack's like season yes two or whenever when like they they did their thing like that that was always like after hours after the party after i had gone home like so it happened so nothing good happens after hours so like it makes me it made me feel so weird when beau would want to just stay out and so that's that's when we put a name to the dark passenger but the dark passenger can really just like it means like anytime you just literally see red and like anger is the only thing and and you you can't reason there's no logic yep there's i feel like you had a lot of that for like birthday parties yeah let's talk about your birthday because I I want to relate to you here and I can't I want to hear your explanation of like what your birthday means to you oh my god I'm gonna disappoint you so much right now why okay so the first few years of Vanderpump Rules like 100 % I was a birthday beast yeah okay I was so obsessed with my birthday I have no idea where it came from you know what I blame the fact that I am a summer like baby and so like I never got to like really have birthday parties there like where all the people could come so like I like made it a much bigger deal as an adult or something but like after the first few seasons of Vanderpump Rules I stopped caring okay I got it out of my system that's great Bravo would never let me stop caring but I was like no but like this is this is a bit this is like your this is your thing like you are people relate to this this is like your you are the birthday queen and literally to this day people when people come up to me like 50 percent of time they're like um either saying the quote about the devil or like pinot grigio and the other 50 percent of the time it's like thank you for making me feel good about my birthday dude i remember watching it and like to people that didn't watch those seasons like the rage that took over you of like it's my fucking birthday sit down i know and like be present and i was like i loved watching it but i don't relate to that and so i was like i wanted to hear today i i think it's great you're over it yeah so for your birthday now you don't really care no I don't really care um I think I was just always just like channeling main character energy you know like when you when you when you're trying to have main character energy you need to care about your birthday main characters care about their birthdays it's a whole month it's a whole thing yeah and I think like that actually for reality tv worked I think on instagram it's annoying as fuck when it's like totally is like my birthday month we gotta stop 10 days before my birthday I'm like no one gives a fuck it's not count down like no one cares no one cares okay we can we relate on that now okay um do you secretly miss a little bit of drama in your life now you know that you don't have reality tv yeah sometimes i know i say this to beau a lot actually i'm like you know what we should get in a fight and i should dark passenger because it would just like make me feel so passionate that would probably make me horny i get what you're saying like a little a little bit a little friction no a little bit i remember when we were in vegas in december actually when i conceived no we were walking past um the sign for absinthe have you ever been to that show no oh it's so good is it good yeah it's really good and i was like oh my god but remember the last time we saw absinthe like i full-blown dark passengered on you and i was like we should do that that'll help us make a baby stop and he thinks i'm insane and he thinks that's so unwell but like i just think that that i think makeup sex is fun i agree i think men have like a little bit harder time like playing the role of like we're fighting but like it's not really like and they're like i don't understand like if i am trouble like stop 100 and they get scared like i try to do it with my partner all the time like just light little tinges here and there can be fun yeah not all the time but like a little like i'm like we've been so good let's let's not be so good let's not be so good let's have to come back i want to miss you i want to be like i want to be scared that i'm gonna lose you you know even though i know i'm not like let me just pretend let me just pretend like play with it i feel like guys can't get there no not but i kind of okay did you ever at one point like bring your trust issues in your past into your relationship that like it really affected you guys yeah past the dark passenger of like staying out late was there anything else yeah well we know we started going to therapy like really early on on into our relationship because i had all of those freak out moments and I just didn't trust him and he didn't understand where it was coming from because he was he had never given me a reason for me not to trust him and we had to like talk through it and the more like we went to therapy the more than he was like thank you so much for articulating this for communicating this because I understand that must have been really hard to have like this happen to you to have your friend do this to you to have you know other times that I had been cheated on like I get it now and like then we were able to work together but like yeah it really affected our relationship yeah I love that you have openly talked about like couples therapy because I think there's such a stigma of like what's wrong with your relationship and it's like why is everyone to be going this early right like why because that's when the relationships like you it's make or break honestly and you're coming into the relationship with all your separate baggage so might as well get it like worked out right away I agree okay your relationship you've talked kind of about how like you have very different sex drives with Bo and everything give the girlies tips of like how do you keep things intimate without at times being actually physically intimate like what are you guys doing honestly Alex I need the fucking tips I need the tips I think listen I think that Bo and I are really good at quality time like we we talk to each other like we we we spend time together like we we're really good at parenting together like I know that doesn't sound romantic but like when you're aligned in in how you view things like that like when you get into a relationship with someone you get married to someone or you decide to have a child with someone you better really fucking like that person because when you have a kid y 'all are in it you're fucking in it 24 7 like and so there are gonna be days that are kind of boring and you better really just like being around that person while doing all of the monotonous mundane shit yeah that's such a good point like I was thinking about you and like having watched some of your relationships very toxic in the past to then like Bo seems like the complete opposite of like stable normal romantic loving sweet like in the beginning did that freak you out it didn't freak me out but I made it what I did with him is like I made a choice like a I was aware of the fact that I was changing my habits like everyone that I've dated in the past it was kind of all the same like exciting and like passionate right from the beginning like just feeling like you know that feeling which like ends up being toxic honestly 100 % and so Bo was kind of everything different you know I mean he was different than anything that I had dated before and I went about it both of us did really slowly and we casually dated we dated other people and we just really got to know each other yeah and I think that that's like what made this relationship so solid is that like we trusted each other there was like constant communication constant like getting to know each other but it didn't know nothing about him scared me because I knew that I was doing everything different yeah I kind of also had I mean I think a lot of people do you have those like toxic relationships but I think at some point people always write in asking like when will I be ready to like not how will I know when to not go for the toxic you just kind of know you know when you're done yeah you totally there's a feeling of like I don't want to deal with it anymore and I think that there's like something like really overrated about the like love at first sight thing I still have friends that like you know are single and will ask me like what should I do I'm like well you write someone off if you don't feel that in love feeling that excitement right away but like that's kind of overrated it is we don't know people right away So how real is that feeling?

55:28Right. It's like there's a difference between going on a first date and actually like vibing and being like there's definitely something here. Yeah. Obviously you have to have attraction and you have to vibe. Yes. But the feeling of like the butterflies but also like anxious and like he's not texting and like waiting and like playing the games and like being so calculated and like that shouldn't be happening because that's like unhealthy. Yeah. Like that's not enjoyable. Exactly. But I think when you are doing that for so long, you can get into this rhythm of then normal feels boring. And I think it's like I got to a point where I'm like, actually, toxic became so boring to me.

56:04I completely fucking agree. Toxic is boring. It's boring because it's so transparent of like, and then we're going to fight and then he's not going to text me. And then I'm going to not text him. And then we're going to get a fight. And then we're going to have this crazy sex. And then I'm going to feel insecure. And then it's just like this. and you're never able to be like I feel really happy today on this nice Wednesday like I know you don't have that yeah and not just I get it I won't say to anyone in their early 20s or in their teens right now like you got to go through it you do have to go through it and I'll say like it is fun to go through it once or twice totally but it would just be nice like if you can if you start to feel like you're getting fed up with it you have you have to also change your ways yeah Like that's just okay.

56:44How did you know Bo was the one? Because I could completely be myself. Honestly. Like I felt like there was I never had to watch what I said or what I did or I never felt insecure in that way. Like I felt like he loved everything about me and he but not just loved it. He would like champion. Yeah. Like he was so into just like me being a basic bitch. That's like so not a dude thing to do to be like, yeah, you go with like your basic bitch self, you know, like he was just like really accepting and a cheerleader. And I think that's what I realized. Like I really want that for myself. Totally. Totally.

57:23No, that's so cute. Like obviously I only get to watch your life like slightly through Instagram, but you guys look like so happy. Thank you. And it's just like really cool to see. like again I literally sitting down with you the best the best version of like a whole person I knew was from season one two and three and like watching those seasons I love that part of you but it's also cool to sit down with you and like get to know you as like a mom and a partner and like just I don't know it's like you're you seem great thank you seem like you like got it together I know I feel like I got it together like I think I do I think so wait so you're on tour yeah and And Kate went to one of your shows and she was like, it is so crazy.

58:04Like she sells out everywhere. You are just like so personable and outgoing and everyone loves you. And like all of your fans are amazing. And she was like, they're like the nicest girls in a room, just like loving life, being so happy to be there. Do you like touring? I love it. That was like the one thing when COVID happened that I was like, if I can do anything ever again, please let it be touring. Like, I really love it. I just love the whole process of it. Not just like creatively putting together. it's like challenging it's like fully challenging myself to do something that's so uncomfortable like putting together like a set like where it's like I'm not a stand-up comedian but like I have to be for a second of course I have to act kind of and then write something for myself then deliver it and hope that people find it interesting right and then put together segments and and you know just I just love the creative process of it and then I also like the whole traveling aspect of it you know like I love going to different places and seeing smaller towns and meeting people from different places and checking into hotels i don't know i just i really i love touring i i give you so much credit because i don't think people know how hard it is it is fucking ridiculous how hard it is how long is your show um an hour and a half to have acts and yourself and everyone entertaining people for an hour and a half live it's like when you think about it like i'll always like when i'm watching everyone leave the theater like i'm in my car and i'm like all these people like spent their money to come here like they got babysitters they took ubers like they they came here so like if i didn't deliver like that's i'm letting them down you know i mean it's not like they can just they're at home flipping on a television show it's like they went out of their way like and i appreciate that so much that they put in that effort to come see me so like i the pressure is is is on it's there but i get nervous to go on stage now or no um there are when i know people in the audience and so how many cities do you do i think we did we're doing like 25 i think but we're over halfway done i think the hardest part now i've realized this is and when i do this again i'll plan it differently is yeah i can't be gone like six days at a time i miss hartford too much like so those last two shows like i i kind of just like end up not caring because i'm feeling down wanting to go to your i just want to go home and like be a mom and so like i've realized that i think that the next time around I'll be like okay like three days yeah then we get home like three days then we get exhausted by being pregnant and touring at all no okay let me tell you something this is gonna sound extra alcoholic okay it's okay because like I haven't sounded alcoholic enough this whole time but I was a way more low energy and tired the first two tours that I did before COVID because we would like drink and have fun you know I mean like we'd have like Bloody marries on the plane and like drink rosé while we're getting ready and drink backstage and have aperol spritzes on stage and i just felt tired because of that now i think i have the most energy out of everyone that i'm traveling with because i'm sober wait no i actually so get that like you would just keep drinking i would do the same thing yeah you just keep going oh that's so smart so now i'm sober so i feel like i feel sharp i feel just way more alert and with it and quicker and yeah sobriety really suits me it's just not fun you're like i know it's for the best for me but like the minute i have my child i'm back on my shit 100 i'm getting an aperol spritz brought to my fucking room right after i don't know bo literally brought me he made spicy margaritas in the hospital for me and he's gonna do that again the fact that you said you swish around an aperol spritz and just hold it there hold it i feel like that's what i'm gonna have to do if i ever get pregnant yeah or like a really good red wine like i'll i'll like i'll have a little bit of red wine every now and then like my doctor literally says it's fine to like have some few steps like everyone calm down half a glass it's fine yeah yeah yeah like i'll leave it in my mouth like literally it feels like for three and a half minutes because you just the taste i miss the taste i get it so much what is like coming up in your life so you're writing a book you're having a kid i actually love how i didn't even have to ask you you're writing a book you're having a kid and you're on tour yeah you're kind of thriving and i have two podcasts so like how do you do two podcasts i mean when and go on tour the other ones with with with beau so like it's easy for us to just like make time to do it so it feels it doesn't feel like it's as too much yeah as much a lot let's have you back home when you're hammers then we really can't air it toasty that would be fun to do one next time we like actually get fucked up yeah and like see what comes out of our mouths no Alex this was like one of my favorite podcasts I've ever done was it fun this was so fun I'm so happy you came because I had an idea we would be vibing we I also feel like we never shut the fuck up do we have one breath of silence and we were like I haven't even heard the room tone since we started but I guess that's a good podcast right yes or everyone's gonna be like you guys are so fucking annoying yeah you guys are annoying you guys keep talking over each other I don't think we were talking over each other we were two professionals yeah we like right as you were finishing I would pick up and it was like yeah I think we had a good time no this was this was I'm I'm not joking.

1:03:06This was one of my favorite podcasts I've ever done. Like I really just had a really great time. I had a great time and I felt like I really could just relax and we had like a normal fun conversation that was just happened to be filmed for millions of people to watch. Yes. Woo. You were so fun. Thank you for coming on. Thank you. This is great. Oh my God. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.