The Chainsmokers: Cheating, Threesomes & Toxic Exes (FBF)

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1:46What is up daddy gang? It is your founding father, Alex Cooper with call her daddy. Check your mics. How are you feeling? I want to hear every word. I want to hear the breath. Is that close enough for you? Yeah. Triple check. I'm a heavy breather. Is this like too close? Are you a mouth breather? Mouth breathing is like a big thing apparently. You know, like, well, actually like, sorry, like, Chewers, mouth chores. Nose breathing. I think that's how you're supposed to breathe. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're supposed to breathe that way. Yeah. Are you a mouth breather? No, I'm not. That'd be a horrible thing to have, like, on the whole on the tone of the podcast you're just hearing this i'm like okay we need to mute his mic okay let's just start yeah chain smokers welcome to call her daddy thank you or i just got nervous now i said i wasn't but now alex just shit his pants he's like fuck let me take a drink cheers let's do a little another cheers cheers guys cheers everybody calm down everything's gonna be okay the boys are a little nervous guys daddy gang be nice to them in the comments I wasn't at all the same with Alex just right until we started.

2:50And now you're like professional Alex. I'm like, hello. Yeah. I feel like it's like you guys have seen this many times, you know. I'm much more scared giving like a best man speech than I am performing in front of like 30 ,000 people. Totally. I think that makes sense though. Isn't there a thing Dave Chappelle does where he only performs in front of like four people in a room before he does it? I think I've heard that. And it's ten times harder to perform in front of like three people than a crowd. That makes sense. Have you done a best man speech recently? Not that recently, but I killed it. I murdered it, my speech.

3:19Because you always got to – the way you start a best man speech, and someone tipped me off, is you just insult the guy who spoke before you right off the bat. Oh, that's good. So you're like, give it up for John. He did his best. And then everyone immediately is like, ha-ha. Oh, that's great. And then you can launch into whatever. So I tried that. My sister got married the summer before last, and I tried that trick because Alex had just killed this best man speech. He was telling me how good he did. Oh, fuck. And then I was like, oh, you tried your best. But I said it to my female cousin, and it really hurt her feelings.

3:48she's like sobbing yeah she was like fuck you and then she's like do we have beef on something i was like i don't know i just i just heard it was a good thing to say like and you just you did you had a great speech i'm sorry it was really heartfelt yeah so we were supposed to meet in miami yeah well i feel like we were supposed to meet like so long ago it's weird that we have never met i'm kind of glad that didn't happen given the nature of like it's just such a shit show you know what i mean like every morning was like a way too late and okay wait i want to ask you guys because i was gonna say what did i miss in miami because to give people context we were supposed to do this interview in miami yeah i got sick maybe i was faking maybe i was no i'm just kidding i was sick yeah and i couldn't make it either way what did i miss what did you guys what would you definitely thought about it if you were it's such a shit show i used to be like a receptionist in an art gallery and we and and i would go to basel it's like 15 years ago and you would go to basel and it was like one party the liberal party and then it was actually just like collectors and people that worked in the art world and it was like really fun but like really manageable and now like I've never seen I don't know where the art people are I don't see them at all and it's just like craziness and there's so much shit and everyone's has FOMO and you know like you'll be I remember being at I think it was like you know like Miles and Kygo and those guys they had a party and it was like awesome it was like Black Coffee was DJing it was an open bar it was a bunch of friends and then everyone's like we got to go to this Bob's party and I was like but why I was like we this is great here everything's great and you're like no no it's better over there for sure and i was like i feel like the people over there are saying that this is the same thing yeah everyone's like chasing the night it's like fashion week it's like we have to go to 10 events and it's like right like this party's kind of dope like yeah yeah why don't we just stay here and it's just like you're constantly missing and feeling like you're you know in reality it's like none of it's true so how did you guys meet you guys have been together for 10 years this is a thriving relationship drew how did you guys meet we met I was finishing school in 2012, 2011, and Alex had actually started Chainsmokers with another kid.

5:43So I'm not the original Chainsmoker. Oh my God, where's he? He's a dog walker. Well, that was last time we checked. Fuck this is, hope he doesn't watch the show. Shout out. Okay, so there was an OG and then you came in and swapped. from my understanding, the other kid didn't want to, wanted to go and do his own solo career and Alex was like, what the fuck? Like, we built this whole thing up and it wasn't much by the way it was like djing and like sl you know what i mean like but it was something yeah yeah and and i like knew how to make music like pretty shitty music but i like was really into it and uh and then we met and he the other kid left and he was like i want to find someone who like makes music and we got introduced by our manager our current manager who's still with us to this day and yeah rest is history did you guys like immediately hit it off vibe wise personality why didn't you have a funny like you didn't know which one oh my god so i go so i go go to New York City I take like the the feng hua bus you know about this yeah yeah like$13 bus that goes from like Boston to Chinatown so I take that thing down there um and I like go and meet them at this club but I didn't know I knew there were two guys in chain smokers and they were both there and I didn't know which was which and I remember just going to the club and meeting and both of y 'all and I was just like oh god I hope it's Alex like the other kid was okay but I really hope it's Alex and and thank god he he texted me and I didn't even know because he texted me the next day and was like come over to my apartment and not until you open the door to your apartment did I have confirmation it was you it's like a blind date and it was like what do you listen to and it was like I like Calvin Harris was like me too you know what kind of beer do you drink and it was like and but like in reality what was really crazy and we did have this like conversation the first time we met was you know we were like what do you want to accomplish and how do you want to get there and we were like both of us were like we want to be the biggest you know artist on the planet and we'll take do whatever it takes to get there from like a work perspective and and then I want to branch out from there and create and use that platform to like get into other things that interest us and you know it's like kind of crazy now to look reflect back on that because like we had no fucking idea back then it was like literally like cool let's let's do this then and then he moved down from you know maine and i like quit my receptionist job and they were like are you crazy that's like a recession right now like you want to you know like go be a musician full-time and they were like listen we'll have you back you know when this fails and now it's like nuts like i buy art from them and it's like you know that's so crazy because it's kind of like a love story honestly we're like you've been together for 10 years you guys met on a blind date like and then you ended up being in front of him and you were like i really hope it's him and not the other one and then you guys got matched up and quite romantic it is quite romantic perfect situation like it all worked out so okay to people that are watching i want them to like get to know you guys better individually through each other's eyes should i leave the room no no because you guys are you guys are a couple but i want to hear let's start with alex how would you describe drew yeah to someone that doesn't know him um so he likes to go like deeper with things and i'm like uh i don't say i'm surface level but i like to cover a lot more ground he is like the least communicative person on the planet in fact like i think i like text madison beer about a song yesterday and i was like hey it's alex i got your number from drew because he sucks at texting So like I'm gonna, you know, gonna, uh, and it's not that like he doesn't care.

8:57He just does. I don't know what actually don't know what goes on in my head. Yeah. Like you see it and you're just like, uh, you know what I mean? And you just like move on. Exactly. Like, are you quiet? What do you mean? You're not communicative. Like, I read things, but Alex is also hyper communicative. So a lot of these conversations that like, I'm on an email or I'm on a text thread, he's already said what I'm would have said. So true. Do you guys find yourself on the same page a lot? Yeah. Most of the time. We're completely aligned. Like in like goals and all that stuff. We've had our disputes, but it's always like, you know, reconciled in a really like reasonable way.

9:26You did walk into my house and say that you guys have gotten into multiple fist fights and punch each other. Yeah. Not in a couple of years, though. Yeah. It's been a couple of years. Which might mean we're due for one. Yeah. But it's been good. So you guys are just fighting over like regular shit, but you guys have an ability. It's like sibling fights, you know, where you're just together all the time. Like over a front seat in like Mexico. Yeah. I don't remember even being mad at you. I think that was just. Yeah. We were like, hey, we've never fought. My time was in, like, what's that, Mallorca at a club.

9:52That was bad. You know, it wasn't just that. He had been pissing me off for a while, you know? And I'm sure I've been pissing him off for a while, you know? And then it just gets to that one moment where he just does the one thing, and I lost. I initiated, I think, every fight. Wow, so are you hot-headed? Not anymore, but I definitely was. You've worked on it. No, yeah, I've worked on it. Therapy and stuff. Oh, you've gone to therapy? Yeah. Have you guys ever gone to therapy together? uh no we've considered doing like executive coaching but not not therapy maybe couples therapy is the move well now i feel like really yeah we don't have like issues yeah you think that but as a woman that's standing here that used to have being a duo did you go to couple therapy when you know but we should have you can always get ahead of it yeah okay drew now you describe Alex's personality?

10:42He's hilarious. Like sometimes I'll just be like making a drink and we'll be, you know, just talking to somebody and I'll just overhear him just say the most outlandish thing to people. I don't know where it comes from. He also has like no filter and also the most insane memory. Like he will like remember, we'll like we meet so many people every weekend. We're doing like, we've been doing 150 shows a year for the past seven years, probably sometimes more even and a lot of those are in vegas where we're like hosting people for our tequila or our venture fund or people that we've just accumulated along the years and someone will walk in and he'll just he'll remember like i will be like i recognize this guy's face i can't place it he'll remember that their kids are in tennis lessons it's insane weird so he's a good person to have next to you because i'm you where i'm like i fucking know that face but i couldn't even tell you the name if you put a gun to my head and you're like oh it's this person they have this many kids they this is the address but then i'm the one that's like all right i'm kind of like done this tonight and drew would be like i just like stayed up till 6 a.m with that guy and now we're like yeah like kit like brothers and so it's like i go i go deep with like one person or three people whatever yeah this is helpful i'm definitely like way more like i i don't know what the word is i guess just depends you're a surface level bitch yeah and drew is just but he's like he's like i don't know if anyone texts any more like more people than you per day he's like talking to like you know the head of some like massive like hedge fund and he's talking to like the bartender from the dueling piano bar inst louis that we played on a wednesday night in 2013.

12:15definitely like it's crazy for sure okay and you're not answering your text at all exactly okay good to know good to know okay i've fully taken advantage of his powers that's really great what are your fans like passive and chill we have like the most like relaxed nice fans ever like yeah like we could just sit it like anywhere and like i think we have like a really nice level of of like celebrity or fame or what i'll call it because like maybe some people recognize this usually it's like they have to pull their phone out to like confirm the the sighting and by the time they do that we're gone you know and move on or they'll just come up and be like hey big fan and then it's like dip out you know what i mean like we don't have like any like rabid you know crazy story i've told this fake story for like years about because we didn't have a fake crazy fake fan story and that was like what people always asked us so I just came up with one tell me and I lied about it for like seven years and I could be so good at telling it I haven't told in a while but basically it was the story about we play the show in Italy and there was this fan in the front row that was like dead you know stone cold staring at both of us and was like really awkward and then in the middle of the show she pulls out like a buzzer and just starts shaving her head but like not changing her reaction and then she starts eating her hair and then we're like freaking out and we're like losing our focus and then she's kind of just like disappears into the crowd and And that's the story.

13:30And no one was like, huh? And then he told us in every interview, it made it all the way to Larry King. Larry King. He told Larry, Larry King this story. What the fuck are you? Did you guys coordinate this or did one day he just spring this in an interview and you were like, you just made it up one day and we just kept going. And you didn't say anything. No, it was just easier than the like, you know, like I just didn't have one and I just wanted to just go along. I wanted an awesome story. Do you have one now? Is there like a crazy fan interaction you can now tell or no? i just fans are so pleasant and passive they're just like i don't know i will you know that's if you're any fans out there want to do something crazy yeah like get after it yeah go go for it i think you're very fortunate though to be to have do you have crazy fans like girls go yeah like i have some crazy interactions i've had like are girls crazier or guys crazier for you it's a different vibe the guys are always barstool fans so they're like cooper and i'm like oh my god And they'll like bear hug me.

14:27And I'm like, hello, sir. And it's like, it's very like, have you ever hooked up with a fan? No, because most of my fans are women, but I have had multiple guys are like, no, I'm like, Oh, like you go hook up with Dave. Um, I've had, I've had multiple times where like a fan will chase me down and like, give me a vibrator or like just something very, and like, I still use it to this day. And I think of her like, it's very cute. Like, but my, I would say my fans are kind of similar. They're very chill, very passionate, but they're open books to me and like we have like very cute interactions a podcast is very different because you're speaking about yourself so much and getting deeper into yourself by talking about with other people you see reflection all that stuff like us we just they just hear our music and we're just two generic white guys so they know the music but it doesn't right go beyond that you know but that's why it's fun to sit down with you guys you would probably be great on a podcast you want to get deep i'm definitely gonna launch a podcast i'm waiting i just need more time but it's gonna happen i could see you guys doing a pod it's gonna be dark and dangerous oh my god maybe that's i'm not gonna be there you don't want to be on it i don't have the it's gonna be controversial i'm not consistent enough to do it okay right you don't have the workout this is gonna be like yeah he's got stories it's gonna be good i'll listen one day maybe

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16:39And there is no account fees or overdraft fees. So you get to keep more of your money. You can also get your paycheck up to two days early. And when you sign up with eligible direct deposit, you can earn up to$300 welcome bonus, which we absolutely love to see. Okay. So if you're ready to get more out of your money, sign up for SoFi checking and savings at SoFi.com slash call her daddy. SoFi checking and savings is offered through SoFi bank and a member FDIC terms apply. Call her daddy is brought to you by Sephora from less is more days to full glam routines everything you need for all things beauty is at sephora yep sephora is where you will find the hottest newest products you won't find anywhere else the ones popping up in every get ready with me think summery fragrances like kaoli eden plush pair 23 eau de parfum next level makeup the skincare that keeps you glowing like it's your full-time job shop the newest hottest beauty only at Sephora um okay Alex take me through your guys like pre-show rituals and like how has it evolved over time it not much you know what I mean it's not like I feel like the thing about for us at these shows is like you don't want to like build up too much like tension and pressure it's almost like do the least and just like oh it's just like a normal day that happens to have like a huge performance at the end of it so like the more that like when we have big shows and like our whole team's there and there were lots of friends it's like almost like builds up more anxiety because everyone's like asking you like are you nervous like are you excited how you feeling like you just feel more tension around you so for us it's like you know a warm-up like drinking some tequila backstage like maybe work out earlier in the day or something like that we have like a simple pre-ritual handshake and and it's like gay time but i feel like can you do it right now it's just it's that it's just like oh wow super simple yeah you can learn really simple I don't remember that.

18:37Yeah, more of like a superstitious thing that you have to do it. When you guys are getting nervous for a show, do you guys really lean on each other? Or do you guys go kind of like individual mode? Like just like sit there individually and deal with your stress? I feel like it's kind of like, I don't know. I feel like we don't share necessarily like how nervous you are because that probably just makes everyone more nervous. But I think, you know, like in the case of like Vegas, I mean, this is a weird example. But like if I'm exhausted and you can see it, like he'll step up and go harder. And like vice versa or, you know what I mean?

19:08In that, in that sense. So you can kind of tell when someone needs like, yeah, like needs like, okay, like he's just clearly like, you know, sick right now. Or like, like we do play sick all the time. I think we've only canceled one show ever. And you know, and you're just like, all right, I'm going to pick up the slack and like give it a little bit extra today. So like, cause he clearly just, you know, is struggling. This is a real team unit here. I'm really liking the vibe. It's very cool. It really is. Cause like, it's like, you know, the same way I feel like when girls can like look and look at each other and like communicate like everything and then guys are just sitting there clueless about what just happened right you guys are the ones insane yeah and they're like we should probably go and you're like what what did you just say to her you know that's such a specific and so fucking relatable of just being like yeah we're actually gonna go and you guys are like excuse me that was a good example so in 2019 you guys after a tour went off of like the grid and You kind of went on a hiatus.

20:02What the fuck happened? How did you come to this decision? Tell me about it. Well, we just felt really burnt out after 2019. I mean, I told you we've been doing like 150 shows a year. We had just like released our third album in the fall of 2019. And then we did a 42-city arena tour with Five Sauce. And we just got home. We're like, never again. Like that was just too much. after like a whole summer of like back and forth from Vegas to Europe, Vegas to Europe every week. There's two people that are making the decisions. How do you guys balance what's good for you individually? And then what's good for the chain smokers?

20:45I mean, we've been pretty on the same page in our personal lives. Like we've made a lot of sacrifices. And this is a big thing that we've been talking with our team about now that we're in our thirties, like well into our thirties and it's harder, you know, and there's a lot of, we haven't gone to a lot of weddings. We haven't been here on weekends ever. You know, we haven't, we've like every, you know, we sacrifice our weeks just, you know, like last week, two days, we're just erased being on a plane, you know? And so I think we've been really aligned on that thus far, you know, we've just been trying to get it and be successful and do our thing and not leave anything on the table.

21:21And I'm really thankful that we took that approach, but I mean, going forward, we definitely will have to be more communicative about like hey i don't want to be in la this much or i don't want to go to vegas this much or i don't want to do and who knows what that's going to be but like our lives are changing so that's like a new hurdle that's probably coming for us yeah it's a it's tough because i think you got to balance like you can't forget like how lucky we are to be in this position to begin with and it's like i see so many people like taking advantage of that opportunity and letting it just slip between their fingers because they think it's just like it's hard work like there are people hundreds thousands of people tens of thousands people out there that are trying to do what we do and they're working three times as hard as we are potentially so i think like we've always had that like grit and determination like we might not always be the best at the certain things we do but like i know we apply ourselves and work harder than most people at things we care about so i think it's ingrained in like the fabric of our personalities which is like we're super competitive like we want to be the best we want to get the best out of ourselves and we also like I feel like if I just ran into you somewhere in the street and you were like hey you know oh my god like do you feel accomplished everything I would be to say like absolutely not like we have like very heavy imposter syndrome so for us it's like we feel like we're just kind of also getting started and have so much more to do and say from what this you know chapter is but you also you know like you do want to start thinking about the other things in life that like you possibly can get joy out of because it's like these are probably all like really unhealthy character traits that like lead to you know a life looking back at like 70 being like oh my god like what the fuck yeah i took like free vacation all the way here yeah exactly but also there's like a balance where like you can really potentially accomplish really amazing things i get what you're saying but it's interesting to hear you because like i feel like there's so many people that have success and you're so scared to be like wanting the normal things that come with life that you're like i haven't been to a wedding in a while like I wasn't in LA for like a weekend just like chill and you can in your mind you're like I am I being ungrateful like am I coming off like I don't appreciate what I have but I do think like I understand what you're saying of like there needs to be sometimes a better balance but that also is fucking weird because again I've been in a duo where it's like inevitably you both have different wants for like your personal life right like maybe you have a different plan of like do you both want kids do you not want kids do you want to get married and So like, do you kind of have to stay somewhat on the same page?

23:50Like, how do you guys navigate that? It just worked out kind of in some weird way. I mean, we are very communicative about those things. And I think like we want the happiness of the other person. So it's like, you know, we've gotten this far. I don't think we were like, we wanted, you know, we've always been aligned on the goals we wanted to get and how to achieve them. Like, but at the same time, it's like, you know, as you get older, you're kind of like, hey, I recognize like all of our friends, like all my friends are married with kids. Like I'm probably the last person other than like our agent.

24:19But do you guys feel like, because it's interesting, like to have your job, which is partying and performing and like making people have such a good time. Do you feel like people or maybe like media has kind of pigeonholed you into being the same people you were 10 years ago? I mean, we have a great relationship with the media and press. Like, absolutely not. You said that so serious at first. I was like, really, Alex? Oh my God. No, talk about that. Just glowing reviews. How did it evolve of like who the Chainsmokers started as from your opinion and who you guys are now? Yeah, I mean, we were just ultimately huge.

24:56That opinion of like the being pigeonholed, I think, was DJ or EDM as a whole. You know, we came up in this like super party-centric, very drug-centric like scene, you know, that's like kind of pop probably, I'd say like 2016. um but that was like a whole that was a wave that we rode to like relevancy i guess we were young you know what i mean it's like you make mistakes and i think you know uh much start you know regret like we've grown up a ton and and like there's a lot of things we regret doing but i think that's just like a natural progression for anyone i think there are a lot of mistakes we avoided too by like i think we kind of were lucky we went both went to college and graduated and and like didn't have like success at 18 and become super rich and that stuff like we understand the value of a dollar and like working in shitty jobs and doing you know putting in the time i can relate to that like i feel like i had obviously like a very specific persona when i started this it was like the sex girl yeah that's the blonde that works at barstool and it was like i definitely played into what i was given and the platform that i was kind of like going with but then it can get exhausting and be like hey guys like i don't party like every night and like i don't like have sex every single day like 24 7 like so i think i can relate to you guys on being like i appreciate how we came up but like we've evolved like we definitely have certain things that are different about us that it's not just party drugs perform fuck girls and go to sleep not to get too deep but like on more of a personal level how have each of you like individually i'll start with you drew like evolved as a human being since the beginning of the success and everything took off to where you are now?

26:39I've calmed down a lot. I used to be hyper insecure and I'm still have insecurities, but like so much so that like it drove me and I'm almost thankful for it. And I always like had this like thing inside me that wanted to be successful and just kind of, you know, do everything, but be friends with everybody. And, you know, I had this like idea and I was always chasing that and I was always worried that I was never going to do it. And I feel like that like probably like negatively impacted some like relationships I had early, like through college. I just didn't, you know, you know, I was so focused on what I was doing.

27:13Um, and I wasn't able to be like generous or I didn't have the, you know, the mindset to like be the, be the person that I am now that I really appreciate. Uh, and I'd say that's probably the biggest thing is, You know, I've really enjoyed just being calm and appreciative and being able to like, you know, help people with opportunities that. He really is insanely generous to everybody in hosting people. It's actually crazy. Really? Yeah. It's like a hostel. You live in a hostel or you host a hostel. Because are you kind of saying like in romantic relationships or I guess even friendships, like you couldn't be as present and giving because you were trying to be selfish because you were trying to make something for yourself?

27:53Yeah. That makes sense. Yeah. What about you, Alex? I don't know. I was trying to think of a reasonable answer to this while he was talking. It was pretty good. Yeah, it was pretty good. I mean, I guess if I could reflect further back, I mean, my dad passed when he was like 12 and a half or something like that. And I think that was a very defining moment because I remember a lot of people coming to me and being like, there's two paths. You can kind of go that fucked up route where you lose a parent and everything kind of spirals out of control from there. Or you kind of use this as a moment to catalyze how you want to live your life.

28:24And I was always like an average student and had like terrible ADHD. And I don't remember, like at some point in like late in high school, I don't know if I just started making lists. Like really something simple of that is like writing the things down that I want to accomplish. Oh, my God. These kids lists. And it just like something changed. And I do feel like, you know, in a lot of ways, like in college, you know, when I graduated, I was like, was a receptionist. Not a very like awesome position to have. And I was not a good one at that. And then also like a DJ. And I think about like my mom and my friends that were all becoming like doctors and Wall Street finance people and lawyers.

28:59And it was kind of like crippling anxiety of being like, I can barely take care of myself. Like who would ever want to be with me? Like, how could I ever have a family? Like I literally am like stealing quarters from my roommate to get like Boston Market. And I mean, like, yeah, he had a lot of quarters, so I didn't feel bad. And and and just like, you know, and it was like crazy. So like when to see like us kind of materialize this thing, it was like, holy shit. Like I actually for the first time ever, I can take like a deep breath on some way and be like things might actually be OK for me and work out.

29:34And I'm just super proud of like the things we've accomplished over the years. And it just really motivates me to want to like just push it further and further. Well, I appreciate you both sharing that because it is interesting to hear individually. And it now makes sense to me how you guys work so well together. that's why I was kind of trying to like get and I still want to keep going just individual to then get back to the hole because it's interesting I feel like both of you had such a good drive internally wanting to make it I'm interested to know like how has that affected your like relationships for you romantically because the chain smokers has to be priority how to how has that affected your guys relationships that's been I realized like looking back as times as 2020 like Like a lot of the people I dated, I had to date someone that was down with what we were doing, which is which was really fun.

30:31I had a lot of awesome relationships that like were seriously fulfilling and fun. I think only in the past like couple of years have I like realized that probably the person that's like down to do. They have to be down to do some stuff, but the person who's down to do everything is probably not the one I'm supposed to be with. I need someone that has their own thing that I have to go be a part of and want to go be a part of. But before that, it's been, you know, I realized my selection has been very congruent with like what served our business, you know. And we work really hard and I think we're both now really actively, I mean, you for a little bit longer than me, like really trying to break out of our own heads and have perspective and be like, wait, this week is so intense.

31:15Wait, every week's intense. And if every week's intense, then I need to figure out a better way to deal with it because this, what am I chasing, you know? Yeah. Have either of you ever gone through a breakup that the catalyst was kind of like, this isn't working for our life right now as the chain smokers. Like this relationship isn't working for us, essentially. I mean, I don't think we have influence. I feel like that's one of those funny things. Like you could not like someone's girlfriend, but like, you know, you don't say that shit. You know what I mean? like out of the blue like if he's upset about something then it's an opportunity to speak you know what i mean but don't be like yo i hate your chick and you're just like great well you want to go to dinner like tomorrow night all of us yeah yeah double day and not that like that's even been the case but like i think you know like everyone's on their own journey through these things and i don't know like all the intricacies of what like he loves or you know about someone and vice versa i think again like why we'd never lived together like certain things are good to be you know kept separate but like more importantly it's just like you can tell what also when the other person is suffering yeah as a result of the relationship and it's like a delicate balance of being like you got to let them get there themselves you can't force someone to see that truth you know what i mean yeah but but like also at the same time it's like you know it's tough when that's happening because you do feel it like potentially affecting you know the business but but you're like but again it's like they're bigger things at play here so like again like the ego doesn't come in the check and you're not like bus in the studio being like your fucking songwriting sucks like right you know what i mean like why are you so depressed all the time and you know we're not making music and uh songwriting sucks these days yeah although i'm sure heartbreak you're too happy in your relationship it's a great catalyst yeah yeah that is like that's toxic though because i had sometimes where i was like i'll just go on the date because it's going to give me great content and i was like like things aren't going well you're like right yeah you're like let's go this song is gonna be fucking killer yeah exactly so depressed get broken up with like do something and then get in the fucking studio yeah so you said you're in a relationship yeah how long have you been in a relationship about three years maybe a little longer three and a half yeah yeah she's great going really good i mean she's amazing and i think to like his point what he said like you kind of acknowledge somehow i feel like a lot of the people you date are kind of a reaction to the last person in some ways like looking for things that were missing or didn't fulfill you in some capacity and you kind of like stumble along potentially until you kind of unlock something where you're like oh i get what i like what i what i really need now out of this you guys have very full lives and like you're public and you know i feel like you need someone that's not just like up your ass being like drew and alex like i'll do whatever you want it's like i'm sure at times that's worked because you need someone that's going to be doing that but in actual relationship the person needs to be like hey it's not all about you yeah you don't just like i have life too you just don't fucking know like you know i mean like i really sympathize like with single people and people in bad relationships and yeah you know like it's not easy what about you drew single relationship uh i'm in a relationship okay it's like fairly new a couple months it's exciting how'd you guys meet we got set up on a date a year ago fun and it was the worst date either of us had ever been on not fun yeah it was just like zero vibes just misconnection and and didn't see each other for I think like six months after that.

34:30And then last summer just kept running into each other. And then the bad day became like a fun conversation point. And we like hit it off on like the 4th of July and then started hanging out then-ish in August. And then I started dating I guess like September probably. Look at the two of you just like your healthy dynamics. Have either of you ever not liked the other person's partner? For sure. yeah yeah for sure how did you handle it i think alex kind of touched on it earlier where you can't say yo this is like not right for you out of context it has to be something has to happen and you know one of us comes to the other and says but you know i mean like you know and you're always like hoping to be like he'll understand and we've all seen it now we're like so intimate with our entire crew we've seen like every like from our tour manager to our drummer to our like Like our agent, we've seen them all date the wrong person.

35:28And like we've all taken our like little trip down that road. And it's funny because when it's happening to somebody else, you're like, that's never going to happen to me. And then it shows up in a different format. And boom, it happens to you. And while you're in that format, it's like you know you're like, yo, fucking they hate her. And you know, but you're like, this isn't right. But you're like, they just don't know her yet. Like I know her. And then you're like, no, they do really know her. And I'm just wrong about this. Like that's the worst when you're in a relationship where when you find yourself saying that if anyone is watching this and you're like, they just don't get it.

35:58That's probably the first red flag to be like, no, they get it. You don't fucking get it. And that's the thing. It's like you look bad at a lot of relationships and, you know, you can blame the other person. You just it wasn't a match. It wasn't the right time. It wasn't. It's not them. It's not you. I have great breakup stories. I mean, there's all sorts of awesome. Do you want to share? Anonymously. I mean, should I give the ultimate one? Give something. You guys are saying a little lightly. give the the uh the pack cam yeah the pack is good yeah is that the ultimate one yeah that's the okay give it to me

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37:23Let's talk bank accounts for a second. The average bank savings rate is 0.39 % in interest. You're earning pennies on your savings, but it doesn't have to be that way, daddy gang. With SoFi's high yield checking and savings, the money barely making moves sitting in your savings account can earn over eight times the national average savings rate with eligible direct deposit no account or overdraft fees you can get your paycheck up to two days early plus get an epic welcome bonus when you sign up with eligible direct deposit sign up for sofi checking and savings at sofi.com slash call her daddy today sofi checking and savings is offered through sofi bank and a member fdic terms apply okay so i was seeing somebody and you know over the course of the relationship it was just like all these fights kept happening that I didn't really like understand why.

38:18Like I would just get like a text when we were like on tour and be like, you're a fucking asshole. And I'd be like, I don't know what I could have possibly have just done. And it would be like, you know what you did. And I'd be like, no, I'm asking, like that's why I'm asking you, what did I do? And it was just like, and then she would like disappear for two days. And it was just like the most unhealthy, you know, and you're just like, I don't know what's happening. Like, I feel like I'm losing my mind. And one day I've lived, you know, my friend of mine, Craig, he's like an ex firefighter. and he's kind of the man, he's like Uncle Craig.

38:47And, and. Uncle Craig. Yeah, he's very Uncle Craig. And, you know, I forgot how we got in a fight about something and I was like, and it was the sort of thing where I was like, like, you know, when we were, you know, it's like looking through Instagram and being like, oh, damn, that girl's like super hot. And then I'll be like, wish, I wish on a star. And, you know, and then like, and then like the girlfriend would be like, what the fuck did you say? It's not what we say. I wish on a star. It's not what we say. Yeah, yeah. Really PC way, you know. I wish on a star. I wish on a star I could. I could hang out with that beautiful, nice, smart woman.