Sebastian Maniscalco

0:02Hi, my name is Sebastian Maniscalco, and I feel honored about being Conan O 'Briens. That's very sweet.

0:34Hey, welcome to Conan O 'Brien Needs a Friend and some exciting stuff to talk about today. joined as always by Sonam Obsessian. Hello. And the sturdy and reliable Matt Gourley. Sturdy? Yeah, he is. You are. You are a tugboat beating against the tide. Is he? He is. Okay. You are very reliable and you're a good fellow, fine fellow. You're more fragile. No, he's fragile but reliable. Where do you get - Anyway, he's made of all cartilage. It's okay. No actual bones. You can fight both of you. I have something exciting to talk about. Enough of this dithering and dathering, which is um we announced uh just a couple days ago that uh i have been making this show for hbo max which i believe is now called max we'll see what it's called in another few weeks uh it's called conan o 'brien must go and it's this idea that's been in the works for quite a while which you guys are well acquainted with where as you know i do the uh i do the interviews uh with celebrities and those drop on Monday.

1:38But then later in the week, we drop a interview with just anybody out in the world. Fans. Fans. Just fans. Not anybody. They have to know who you are. Yeah. That's only 98 % of the world's population. Boo. Boo. Conan Boo. No, you're right. It's fans. I should be more specific. Fans of the podcast. And I've really loved those conversations. And that's where the idea came from, which is just I love talking to people so much. What if... And I also used to do travel shows that I that was one of my favorite things that I got to do all those years at TBS. So the thought originated, what if some of these guests that actually end their interviews where they say, well, come visit sometime, Conan?

2:20Yeah. And the idea came, what if I just show up? And so that was the origin for the concept of this show, Conan O 'Brien Musco. So we announced it and they put together a little sizzle reel of some of the episodes that were already in the can. And people seem excited about it. You guys, you saw the sizzle reel, right? It pains me to praise you. But I just know a lot of other people worked on this. It looks so good. It really looks good. Also, there's a brief glimpse of you and me in there. And that really ups the... I think that really adds to the show. Yeah, it's weird because the data says the opposite.

2:59Oh, yeah. You look at the data. Yeah. I look at that. Yeah, you really look at that info. You've never seen data in your life. No, I'm a big data guy and I really got in there and I like micro data and mega data. And I got in there and massive drop offs. No, it was. Yeah, it's nice because you see us talking to them and then suddenly I'm there. Yeah. In their face. And you surprise them. Yeah. Well, it's funny because you try to and some are easier to surprise than others. But it was we put together this kind of quick, maybe two minute piece that that ran and then tweeted it out. And the response was really nice.

3:41People seem excited about the show. The show is and this is important to to point out. The show cannot be completed right now because the WGA, the Writers Guild of America, is on strike. So we stopped everything. And I'm really looking forward to finishing the show. Yeah. But we're not going to do anything until everything gets resolved and the writers get taken care of. So we are on hold for the moment. You traveling is such a it's you're so good at traveling. I mean, you're good at a lot. You're going to love things. But you're really, when you travel. You have mini strokes when you say anything nice about me.

4:20You know? Yeah, you're really funny. That's how painful it is. Yeah. You're going to have a neurologist soon say, Sona, have you been complimenting Conan recently? Because there's a lot of dried blood near your cerebellum. No, but when you travel internationally, there's some of my favorite things that you've ever done. And this is throughout the course of your whole career. I like it a lot. I really enjoy it. and we have gone to some great locations. We have some other great locations planned. So I just find it so kind of reinvigorating to get outside the United States and meet people and run into all these people who have no idea who I am and find out what they're up to, what they're doing.

5:07It's just... And you stick out. I stick out everywhere. I think I could go to Ireland and stick out. It's just so weird. I'm just odd looking in so many ways, but it's, yeah, very quickly identifiable. But so yeah, Conan O 'Brien must go on max. We'll be coming up, but not until the writer's strike gets resolved. Can you talk about where you've been to already? Or is that you don't want to? I think so. You can see in the sizzle reel that the two places we went was to Norway to visit fans there. And that went really well. And then visited some fans in Thailand, in Bangkok. And that was fantastic.

5:56Anyway, it's been a lot of fun making the episodes we've made already. And if you want to see the promo, which is fun, lasts about two minutes, you can find it easily on YouTube. On your channel. On your channel. Your channel. Team Coco. Team Coco. And it's called Conan O 'Brien Must Go. And another thing I should bring up is that if you are a fan of this program and you want to talk to myself, Matt, and Sona, that's always possible. We do it all the time. And you never know. I might end up visiting you. So you can go to teamcoco.com slash call Conan if you would like to reach out to us and have a chat.

6:39Again, that's teamcocoa.com slash callconan. And you can experience how irritating it is to speak to me in real time. You have no idea. You have no idea. All right, we should get into it. My guest today is a hilarious comedian who has sold out arenas across the country. Now he has a new movie, which he co-wrote and stars in called About My Father. And guess who plays his father in this movie? Robert L. De Niro. Exactly. Is it really L? I don't know. You just, okay. Maybe. he's not making that's like an attorney robert el de niro

7:17i'm excited he's here today sebastian maniscalco welcome

7:25listen i know we've we've met uh you've done the show many times on a kid yeah but we haven't really had a relationship outside the show it's not like i'm calling you going what are you doing Friday night. We're having some wine. You want to come by? I just don't know why. I'd love it if you had done that. But you didn't do it for me either. Well, that's not going to happen. Sebastian, there are rules. I was the host of the show. And so no matter, you've become huge. You're massive. You're as big a comedy star as I can imagine. But still, because I was the host of those shows, I had to have a wall up.

8:01You understand. I do understand, but... But my question is being a host of a show like that, right? And you got a lot of people coming through the door day in, day out. Have you made friendships over the years with a lot of your guests? Yes, I have. Okay. I have with a pretty, actually a pretty good number. You just click with people. And one of the things that it takes is just bumping into them someplace else. That's usually what has to happen is you bump into them someplace else. So I'm sure if I had bumped into you and we were hanging out, you would have thought, this is the greatest fucking guy I ever met in my life.

8:39And then you would have signaled to the waiter, you know, more wine over here. And I'd have said, let me get it, Sebastian. This is on me. And you'd have been like, I love this guy. And then the next thing I'd be at your house. Yeah. That would have happened, but we never bumped into each other. Because you were very careful not to bump into me. Yeah, I didn't go out much. When I was around. You were always out on the town. And the minute you read Conan O 'Brien's in town, you would lay low. Yeah. You would lay low until I passed through. No, I'm very happy for you. You know, you're a very funny comic.

9:11You are an amazingly successful comedian. And you've done really well as an actor. And I was trying to think, what is it that Sebastian does that always made me laugh whenever you would come on the show? I realized today it was your amazement. You do amazement better than most comedians I know. You're totally amazed by how screwed up or fucked up something is. And that is a big part of your personality. You stretch it out. Your physicality is really great. Your personality like inflates when you're saying, what's going on with this? I don't understand. And there are a lot of comedians that do what's going on with blank.

9:49Your amazement is, you're the Olivier of amazement. You really are. You know what I'm talking about? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm constantly shocked and amazed at, you know, whether it be human behavior or situations or what have you, I just have an exaggerated way of looking at things. It's been the way I've kind of looked at life since I was a kid. So it's not like it's something that I'm putting on for, I mean, obviously it's comedy, so you have to exaggerate a little bit, but the seed of it is coming from complete awe and shock of what I'm seeing. So, yeah, that tends to be kind of the core of the comedy.

10:32But you know what's great is you tie it in with your history as an Italian-American. You know, your dad, I know, and we'll get to this because it's a huge part of your movie. And I cannot believe you got Robert De Niro to play your dad. I mean, this is most, there are people out there that say, I want to make a movie about my life. I'll find someone to play my dad. And I don't even want to know who I would be able to get. Oh, my wheels are turning. I know your wheels are turning. It would not be Robert De Niro. Orville Redenbach. But yes, we all do that. We exaggerate. We take who we are, really, and then we turn up the knob to like 15 for the comedic sake.

11:19But the core of it is pure. And what you do is it feels, it's a very italian attitude about what the fuck is this all about yeah it's in the culture so the the upbringing and my father is a huge part of my comedy just because you know he came from sicily he's uh when he was 15 years old and he brought a lot of those old world values to america with him and then in the upbringing those kind of values were passed on to me and uh yeah, it's just, I noticed Italian people, I just did a TV show and the other actress on the TV show was Italian. And when Italians get together, it's almost like other people are looking at us and it's like, we speak like dolphins.

12:04They don't even know the, they don't even know the communication. Like, I thought there was going to be a fight that was going to break out at any minute when you guys were talking but it was you know we kind of just know there's a familiar way how we communicate with one another and then when we start speaking outside of the of the culture a lot of people tend to see it and go oh wow this is a different kind of take on life and and the take comes from pretty much my dad yeah it was a huge personality and uh has a lot to say and um i don't know i just took what basically what we were talking about at the kitchen table as a kid and then made a living out of it.

12:45I have said for many years that it all starts at the kitchen table. I think you've said that there's almost a negativity with an Italian point of view that's built in. Is that true? Constantly negative. Everything is always bad. Nothing is ever good. We can't talk about it being good because if you talk about being good, something bad is going to happen. So that's... It's just so sad. It's just the way it is. And yeah, it's like I now have trouble enjoying the fruits of my labor. Right? I don't know if you guys have this problem, but like I'm at a point in my life where I should really be extremely happy about what's happening to me.

13:30Yeah. Yet there is a, you know, part of me that is always kind of looking for the next thing. And am I doing enough? you know like am i it's just i got a podcast is it good enough i'm doing a tv show is it good enough so i i can't sit there and relax right and i don't know if that's just me or is that people who get to a certain level in their career and feel like they got to maintain that level or and you can't relax until i'm reading this book called die with zero right because i'm having an issue with uh spending money and the issue being you're spending too much you're not spending it i don't know what to spend like i like i didn't i grew up working middle class right and it was the money was a huge topic in our house and it was always save save your money because you don't know if your tongue is gonna fall out and you can't do this anymore right which does happen I wouldn't worry about that one particular thing Give yourself a break on that During COVID you weren't worried at all about COVID You were worried Don't worry you're clear on COVID My tongue!

14:45The tongue could go at any time What? Yeah well I mean COVID was a great example It's like you save for a rainy day right And the rainy day came And I was still going you know like i didn't even use the savings right i was just trying to figure out how i could make money and and and live off whatever doing uh corporate zooms you know that's what i was doing i wasn't doing like stand up in my living room but it would be like a uh a moderator asking me questions and i would be making the company laugh on zooms i did like 38 of these things okay Let me just put this in context for our listeners who don't know.

15:30And many people are aware of your massive success. You sold out four shows at Madison Square Garden. That's insane. That's an insane achievement. That's you and a microphone sold out Madison Square Garden. Four of them. How many of those people were on Zoom, though? Half. To be fair, they put a lot of TV screens. TV screens. look at me hi everybody i'm 60 i don't know if you've met me i think that works i think that works when i zoom it's a tv i was picturing televisions with rabbit ears and a zoom coming over in the seats the televisions are in the let's just let it go but my point is sebastian i'm just wanting to put it in context for people that you've had this insane this isn't there are plenty of people in the business that book a sitcom but they're being careful with their money or this to that, you've had an unprecedented level of success that I can promise you right now is not going anywhere.

16:33You have talent and ability and it's not going anywhere. And you have a devout following. But it's fascinating to me that when it stops for a little bit, you're thinking, oh my God, how am I going to make the rent? And to me, this is a very common situation and i do think that it may not be a coincidence that your dad immigrated here uh because i mean famously bob hope you know biggest comedian maybe of the 20th century he came from he immigrated from wales as a kid and was incredibly poor growing up and tried to make it as a boxer and his family were like stonemasons. I mean, he had nothing and he scrounged and scrounged and scrounged and finally made it and then bought up all the orange groves in California when he started making money.

17:27And by the time he's in his nineties, he's, I think the richest entertainer in the United States of America. He's just incredibly wealthy man. And I know for a fact that he would go into the valley with coupons for Carl's Jr. And to me, it's that shit doesn't go away. And although you didn't experience that maybe firsthand, you inherit it from your dad and it's very powerful. So, I mean, to me, it makes sense that you're that way. Yeah. But my whole challenge now is I got like one foot living in that world and i got a one foot living in the world i'm in right now and i'm trying to like just be a little bit more relaxed when it comes to you know enjoying my success i guess that's that's the struggle i'm having at this current point right in my life it's a good problem yeah it's a good problem but i know what you mean and i recommend medication a lot of it and all kinds Don't even just get it from other people.

18:30I'm not, don't even see a psychopharmacologist. I think just get it, random pills from other people and try them out. Okay. Terrible advice. Well, I think it's, you should do it immediately. Okay. Yeah.

18:45What do you think drives you now? Because you have had so much success for a long time, but I can tell you take this very seriously and you were very driven is that your dad's work ethic yeah that that was instilled in me at a young age just like work you gotta work you gotta go out I mean I was working at Fudd Rockers when I was 14 years old that was one of my first jobs and never really stopped working since since I was 14 so yeah that definitely comes from my father and uh you know I don't know for me i felt like it was extremely fun coming up through the clubs and getting my first spot on your show and and and doing these things for the first time no one really knowing who i was it was exciting now it's a little the pressure is a little little bit higher to you know kind of maintain the standard you know right keep the jokes as good as they were you know that's the whole thing it's like you know i did a i did a comedy special that came out on netflix this year and i got kind of like people like yeah it's not as good as your that that the it's not as good as this and as good as that so that never really happened to me before and not that i'm sitting there looking at you know what people are saying but you got to be a fool not to like put your ear to the ground and go is this hitting with people i mean are people kind of getting this and i'm trying something different you know i i normally am a physical comedian so this one i'm like let me throw it back to the rat pack and wear a tuxedo i don't wear a tuxedo because it kind of hinders hinders my movement i'm not as comfortable but i'm like yeah let me do something different you know right and um you know i got some some backlash of oh he's not as physical as he once was i'm 50 no no sympathy in this room we all fought in the korean war everyone in this room i died in the Yeah.

20:40And as a ghost, you're old. He's an old, out of shape ghost. A ghost with a low back problem. That's the other thing too, is to me, the biggest driving thing is if someone's disappointed with something I've done, it makes me physically ill. It's that fear of failure, which doesn't diminish. You'd think it would diminish and it doesn't. And if I'm someplace and it's a small group and i'm supposed to go up and give a toast or something i get anxious and if i feel like the toast wasn't good enough and people are like what are you talking about a toast you know it's you know what are you worried about that for i don't think that goes away no that's with you i could relate to that my my kid just had a birthday party and i got on the microphone to kind of like because we were going to play these games these old school games at my kid's birthday party so i got on the microphone hey everybody we're gonna do that and i got off and I go, I just felt like I let him down, you know, professional comedian.

21:50It wasn't as good as last year's kid's birthday party. All you're doing is saying the pin the tail on the donkey's over here on the right and the dunking board is over there and the bouncy castle, you know, that's all you're there to do. Ah, no, I should have started with the bouncy castle. Then you elevate to the donkey. Shit. Absolutely. And now that we're talking about this, this really, this happened last week. My daughter's birthday and my wife and I went in to, I guess, the parents read to the class on the day of the birthday of the kid. So we walk in and we had our daughter's favorite book.

22:28And the plan was my wife was going to read half of it and I was going to read half of it. So my wife starts to read the book, and she's burning through the book. I just like, and I'm looking at this as a, you know, as kids, you know. And I go, give me the book. And I've never read to kids before. It's a group of six-year-olds. I've never read to them before. I started getting into the book, and then I started, like, incorporating the kids and doing my own lines from the book. We hate Veronica, don't we?

23:06and uh that's i told the teacher i go i'd love to read to the kids every friday if i could could i be a ta yeah but uh i just think it's in eight it's in us to if we get a group of people i think it's innate for us to like not disappoint it's so funny you bring that up we're gonna have to hang out and get wine i'm sorry because there's too much there's too much common ground here but when my daughter was younger, it was read to the kids day. And I went over and this was to the, over to the school. You remember this? And I went over there and I had a story to read. And the story, I remember looking at it, it's only like nine pages long because the kids are little.

23:48And I was like, there's not much to work with here. I remember thinking that, like flipping through it. Like all I've got is nine pages. So what is, I go to sit down and they go, okay, now, you know, Nev's dad, Mr. O 'Brien. And I sit down and I noticed that there's this, like stuffed dragon right behind me, whose face is kind of looking at me. So I kept doing these physical takes before I even read the book. I was like, well, kids, nice to see you. And hug her. And the kids started laughing really hard. So I kept doing all this shtick with the dragon and it was doing really well. And the teacher came up.

24:24The teacher came up, I'll never forget. And she put her hand on my shoulder and said, you just read the book. you just read the book and i was looking at her like you kidding this is killing you don't step on that you know but i know exactly what you're talking about which is that you know it's something this is something else i want to talk about because there's so many things it's something i really appreciate about you is that you have your performing persona and i've noticed whenever i'd come in and talk to you in the dressing room beforehand or afterwards or even when i talked to here today at the podcast you are a very quiet thoughtful man yeah and i'm curious if you encounter you're so well known out in the world when you're yourself with your family with the kids there are there people that want that other sebastian do you know what i mean and you are a very dignified intelligent quiet guy who is not performing at this moment yeah uh yeah i you know yeah people do think that's uh who i am on an everyday basis you know kind of not loud but like over expressive and whatnot when i get together with you we're just kind of talking it's normal and what have you so yeah listen i i'm not i'm not life at a party by any means all right and i think that's the the misconception with some comedians where they go invite the comedian is gonna make the room laugh you know if you invite me over to to your house and there's other people there that i don't know i tend to be you know allen's call it shy it just i tend that it takes me a while yeah to warm up to the group yeah even when i when i do these things right these these podcasts which i don't i don't do a lot of them just because i mean i don't know i just feel like is this going to be an environment where i'm going to be comfortable to kind of be myself and like express my feelings and then obviously with uh you six i fit right in here

26:33we like to think it's a welcoming environment no but like sometimes you go in it's like i don't you know i don't know what do we well also i've noticed that a lot of people think comedy is a thing like you hire a plumber they come over oh i see what the problem is and they fix it i remember early on where people you know you know the corporate event now corporate events generally speaking are notorious for this we're like yeah no we're gonna have a comedian and then you get there and then it's just a dance floor and then the people you know it's like you got to have the people near me you know you can't be you know 40 feet away but you're not mussolini yeah you know you need you need people yes exactly exactly so then you'd have to do a quick adjustment and go all right i'm going to perform now on the dance floor now i'm going to have to go you know and so you got to make it right and it works in life too i think you know sometimes i think you're in a situation where it's a social setting and you know maybe the expectation is you know for you to be funny but you even look at the environment and this this ain't this ain't the environment for for me to like excel here so then i then i go like i'm like a shut-in i don't say nothing and then my wife's like why aren't you talking i go it's just it's just not right you know like it's it's uh yeah i don't know i feel uncomfortable sometimes around like um went to a birthday party yesterday kid's birthday party right i just uh i don't know i just felt like i'm just gonna hang out my kids here because i just didn't feel like any like pockets or any situations where i could get involved and really kind of start to get something cooking yeah yes i know exactly what you're talking about i was i was at an event that i I was supposed to, that I emceed.

28:14It was a really good cause. I was to raise money for wounded military vets. And so it's a great cause and I was really glad to do it. And it's this big event. I'll never forget I'm backstage and I'm gonna go out and I know what I'm gonna do. Just before I went out, they came out and they played taps. Oh shit. Dun, dun, dun. You know, and they played taps and the whole room gets really solemn. And then a voice of God just went, ladies and gentlemen, Conan O 'Brien. Oh shit.

28:45This is like a dare, you know? How do I get from where we are now, which is very sacred and solemn and appropriate, but why did you want a comedian to come on after that? Yeah, it's difficult to come out to that environment. I did something similar. I was at a 9-11 gig, and they show a video at 9-11, and the people, and this and that, and then they're, please welcome Sebastian, and I come out and I'm like, okay, you know, let's get into my dad. My dad?

29:21Or also you're doing comedy about how you've had a hard day. Oh, boy, the day I've had. Oh, really? Did two towers collapse? Oh, shit. And thousands and thousands of people, hold on, hold on, I know, I know, but let me talk about my day. I mean, it's just impossible. Yeah. It's like a Harry Houdini thing where it's like, we're going to take Sebastian Mascoco and wrap chains around him and put him in a bank vault and throw him in the Hudson river. And then let's see if he can get out. Yeah. I know that like me, you probably grew up very Roman Catholic. Yeah. Did you do the whole nine yards? Were you a choir boy?

29:56Altar boy. Altar boy. Did the funerals. Did you do the funerals? No, I was the, because they could tell that I could actually enunciate pretty well. They made me the, what's called the lectern, which is the guy who reads certain passages. We didn't have that. Yeah, well, it's usually like the priest does it, but they would have someone step in and read a couple of passages. And they were like, this guy can enunciate. He can enunciate? Literally, they were like, this kid enunciates. And in Boston, nobody enunciates. Everyone else just sounded like they had a bunch of clamshells in their mouth. And then in the corner, I was saying, And on the third day, he rose.

30:40In fulfillment of the scripture, he's seated at the right hand of the Father. He'll come again in glory to judge the living and the dead. They're like, we gotta use this guy, you know? So they had me doing that, but I envied the, you know, like you get to ring the bells. I didn't get to ring the bells. That was a bell guy. You sound like... I'm a bell guy. You're bragging. You're bragging. yeah it's like i'm getting guys for a bank job do we have a bell guy i'm a bell guy i held the water you ever held the water for the no no where they fling the water yeah so i had the little bucket and yeah i did the i did the whole thing over at saint cecilia parish in uh 1985 so yeah wow you guys are so cool yeah aren't we you were at saint cecilia's in 85 five huh i was at saint ignatians saint lawrence i worked a couple of churches this is the 70s i'm an older guy than you but the 70s was really the time to be in a catholic church all of our priests you know were pretty much they were either italian or irish but we had one guy whose his thing was to he had always had change in his pocket and as he was and he was real like a club comic and he would jingle the change in his pocket and walk around and you know and and give the homily and it was always in like a very folksy and kind of working jokes in and stuff and then he'd always end the at and end the uh mass by saying uh they're supposed to just say you know uh so go in peace to love and serve the lord you know that's what they're supposed to do at the end of the mass and be like go in peace to love and serve the lord have a nice day have a nice week like see you around what's jesus think about this ending different did you do confession did you go to confession it's confession i always froze in confession i didn't know what to say i would make shit up oh really yeah i would say i murdered a man and i mean i would say anything but i never i don't i didn't confess anything real i mean there's nothing going on back then where like i didn't walk in when i was 13 and say oh yeah could have made it adultery.

33:00I mean, there was none of that. I coveted my neighbor's wife. You got to see this broad.