Would I Lie To You?

0:00Good evening, gentle listeners or watchers, and welcome to Distractable. This episode, non-bipedal Bob's baby flies the coop, then he forces his friends to fib. Wiz and Wade doesn't defeat decrepitude, threatens infanticide, rips Sam and Dean, then thinks hard. Molested Mark breaks a metabone, gets technical about shooting, the nose is necromancy, and dishwashers. from email overload to the female orgasm. Yes, it's time for Would I Lie to You? Now sit back and prepare to be distracted and enjoy the show. Hello and welcome back to another episode of the longest running episodic chronicling of three men aging ungracefully.

0:56that's right it's time for another episode of distractible oh man oh come on guys i gotta cast on my leg i'm not feeling good about where my my situation is doesn't really reflect that much on you guys i feel pretty reflected it's just your bald bald head uh that's right i'm your host my name is bob i won the last one somehow i don't remember feeling like i should have won but i i did and so i get to host this the two other voices you've heard so far are of course mark and wait they're always here one of them's gonna win unless i do we just had that happen with with wayne with the back-to-back so you never know i felt really good that felt really good but probably one of them's gonna win they're gonna host the next one blah blah blah there's other rules we don't remember them we're gonna apply them at random before we get into the game that i have planned for today that i worked on i think i could say hours i spent hours on this might be embarrassing depending on how the game goes uh small talk how are you guys doing today pretty good wonderful thanks for asking it sounds good i have to i'm turning into you know uh adam driver's character in snl when he was the oil tycoon stabbed the bird yes i love that i feel like day by day i'm turning into that man with my various business enterprises and the various eat i i have to send so many emails i i never imagined i would be at this point in my life where my my entire existence revolved around sending emails and that's what i'm doing day in day out to whom it may concern go fuck yourself to whom it may concern i hope you die to whom it may concern and you know man business is so hard when 15 years ago mark made that choice and was like look i could have a job in biomedical engineering where I send a lot of emails, sit at a desk, or I could have fun with my life.

2:48Never saw this coming. I look at Mark and I just want to say, Who's H.R. Pickens? Exactly. I think it was H.R. Pickens, and his name was like something something Parnassus. I just remember when he stabbed his cane through the bird and everyone was just like, Oh, props isn't going to like that. A very good character. I would watch a whole movie based on that character. He got cast in X-Men or something, I think, or like for 2028. I saw that he introduced his character by their civilian name, and I don't know enough about it to know what that means. But apparently he's going to play some someone in the X-Men people.

3:27I've learned most of my Marvel lore and X-Men lore and everything else from watching movies in the last 10 years or so. So that probably when Iron Man come out, 2008 or 2009, I guess it's been more than 10 years or so. yeah almost 21 might say no don't do that don't do that to me oh god you're right it's not that bad man it's not that bad it's not your fault just wait till you hear when you were born i think i think when every time someone has a revelation like that they actually physically grow older in that moment because their body their brain is like oh yeah we're older hit the button There's been so many moments where I've pictured myself as Matt Damon aging and saving Private Ryan that gif of him just like Okay, well, it's not that bad man.

4:14It's it's not that bad He's a little sad when he's doing it, but you know, it's not that bad. It's me Matt Damon No, that's not how he talks. They go Matt Damon His eyes are actually perfectly open. You know when when he's old is it I'm looking at it right now No, that's not it. No, he's looking at a grave. Remember, he's looking at a grave. For listeners, Wade just did a one-for-one recreation of the scene from Saving Private Ryan where they age Matt Damon to be very, very old. That is... Look, with Sam's assistance, no one will ever know I didn't pull it off. Right, Sam? Chucking them out hot and fast.

4:52Right, Sam? Right. Well, today's a big day for me, too, and I'm allowed to talk about small talk. I couldn't keep it in, and so I already said this to you guys, but James's first day of preschool was today. We did the old picture by the front door. He got a new, his first ever backpack, carried it proudly to school. It's like way too big for him, because even the smallest backpack that we could find at the store is for like, I don't know, a five-year-old, and he's three, but I think he had a good time. Yeah, I told you before we, I don't know if it was before we were recording, but he was screaming and moaning, but I think he just had to go down for nap time.

5:25It was so good he didn't want to come home. That's why he was sad. I mean, almost definitely. If there's anything that I know James would enjoy, it's a room full of other kids who are not allowed to leave, and they're all supposed to play together and work and become friends. His biggest sadness in life is when we go to the playground and other kids are already doing something else, and he just comes and is like, can I play? And they're like, we're high schoolers. You can't play with us. And then they leave. And he's like, I could have done it. Why are those guys so fucking mean to me? I could have done it.

5:58They know he'd come steal their girls. He's going to steal yours first. I, he, yeah. He's not subtle about working on that either. He is not. Does it right in front of you. Doesn't give a shit. He is very ballsy. I got to respect it. Like I, you know, if I lose, I lose at this point. Like, yeah, it's, it's, it's, it's complacency. Game on. Like, whoa. Hey, wait, I have to, I have to ask you're not going to, you're not planning on doing anything to my three-year-old son. Are you? We'll see how far he's willing to go, man if he escalates i'm escalating i don't like that answer that's not a good answer it's unsatisfactory check minus on your report card there you have a report card in front of you you could you could do things like that mr judge sir good point no wait hold on no no no i'm aging again i'm aging again sam no make him sam make him younger actually that works that's you get find another age where bald is totally appropriate wait i'm a baby again that means gay mom with with James again.

6:54We're the same age now. This story's getting a little complicated. I'm not sure. It's like a combination of Benjamin Button and The Notebook. Probably not The Notebook. I just don't know a lot of romance movies. I've never watched The Notebook, so I don't know. Oh, Wedding Crashers. That's probably not a romance movie. Honestly, The Notebook is a good movie unless you have dementia in a family member or something, and it is possibly the saddest, for me, like the scariest movie I've ever watched. Speaking of the choose your own, so people were asking, hey, wait, great episode. Waiter just completely rip off Supernatural, because there's a Supernatural episode about like a pagan god where a town makes sacrifices, but I was like, okay, one, there's like an X-Files episode.

7:37I think there's an entire Goosebumps episode that came out before Supernatural with that, and then Children of the Corn, like there's a lot of things. And then half of every indie horror game ever made is kind of also cult in town. Outlast 2 is like all cult in town. That one with the goat. So not only did you rip off that one episode, you ripped off everything in the world. Norse mythology, the harvesting gods, the Veneer, Veneer, whatever. I played Fears of Fathom recently. That's kind of like got that town culty vibe to it. There's a lot of town culty vibe things. So if you guys are going to blame me for ripping off Supernatural, give credit to the other things I ripped off too.

8:14Actually, you know, there was a 1973 film by the name of Cult Town. Damn it. We used to make that joke all the time. I remember how unoriginally you've been this whole time. Whenever I was writing it and I came up with the name The Shepherd, every time I would write down that word, all I would hear is Mass Effect people going, Shepard? That's what I got to, but I didn't want to say anything to ruin the mood. Every time I hear the word Shepard, I'm like, Shepard, this is my favorite cult in the Citadel. Shepard, my quads. My quads, Shepard. My ass, Shepard. My calibrations. Calibrate me, Shep Daddy.

8:45What was the other Krogan's name? The one that no one liked? He was like the tube baby Krogan or something like that. Oh, I really can't remember. I remember that character vividly because he's fucking annoying. But yeah, Rex stands out like super hard. I can't remember the other one's name. There's only two things I remember from Mass Effect 2 and it's Miranda. Why? What does that mean? That's funny. Explain it. Because I love the voice actress, Yvonne Strahovski. And the body. What the fuck? I think if you just said that and didn't make those noises, I'd feel way better about it. Wait, I know we've covered this before, but so Miranda was your romance of choice?

9:25Oh, yeah. I was tally. The only one that I don't have any respect for is Liara. Anyone that's like, I remember it was Liara. I'm like, that's the worst choice. That's terrible. That doesn't make any sense to me. You know what? That's not okay. It's been a long time but I have done playthroughs Both with Miranda and Jolly. They're the only correct choices Really. Those would definitely be my top two I can't remember all the other characters you could remember It's like Ashley or what was the guy's name that Everyone let die in the first one Everyone let die in the first one For no particular reason The people working on him in the Third game being like no one's gonna ever see This no one ever has done This is for the three of you That killed Ashley The voice actor for that.

10:08It's like, you guys are going to call me back, right? For the third game? Technically, some people. There are dozens of us. What is his name? I can't even remember. Caden, Carl, Tim. Caden. That was right. Wow. Is it Caden? Is that right? Hey, see? See? Oh, Caden. I definitely let you die. I have one more thing. I got one more, if you don't mind. Last week, I went down. Oops, upside down. Hold on. I went down. And it's... I went down to GoPro, not headquarters. I was not shot in the middle of the desert. I met them, and they were very respectful, happy to see me. I met the team, and then they handed me this.

10:50A piece of plastic just fell off. Hold on. Rattle, rattle, shatter. Crash noise, explosion in the background. Just the softest could take. Anyway, look. I have it. Ooh. The ILS. the lens looking like it weighs three times the amount the camera does is crazy i absolutely checked in because you did a stream like that afternoon or that night i went to the stream because i was like i gotta know what happened and you it i saw that it was fine but the only other thing i do know is i saw a clip of you i was you be like uh showing it off and then being like it's brand new i just got this drop something hits the desk and you're going it's not broken it's not it's not it's what did you break it wasn't the camera itself it was a mount so this is uh it was something called um a uh metabones speed booster so it's the plastic case that that came in metabones does have some answering to do because that that is a brand new thing i got from them it was a shard inside one of the retaining walls of plast sharded off and then even inside the metadote bones like little clip there was another piece that was broken inside of it so that's supposed to be brand new and that thing uh that that thing was very uh very not new feeling so uh some sketchy shit going on there this camera is all lens and this is a tiny lens it is so small it's so it looks like the camera setup that like a chipmunk filming the chipmunk nfl would use you know how sport sports photographers always have like fucking two two foot long uh lenses this is so fun it is everything i was hoping it would be but i'm doing a video uh where i compare it to just about every camera i own uh and i own some really high-end cinema cameras and there are some there are some things that this thing can do that those cannot do uh like 4k 240 is is such a really nice slow motion frame rate my reds can't do that or at least the komodo cannot do that look at this is the stubbier nine millimeter one it looks very satisfying it's so it's like holding baby shoes you know it's like this is oh it's so dainty and cute it's so i fucking love it's the perfect intersection of like all of my interests like lens i'm literally surrounded by lenses of course you mean the camera not baby shoes right yes well baby shoes man uh but it's just so fucking cute it's so useful it's so fun i also think it's incredible anyway i could i could go on about it for ages but i'm gonna let i'm gonna let the video do the talking um because i'm preparing it for when you know pre-orders are gonna go up uh and i i have uh probably tomorrow i'm going to try to set all things up so i can get i'm gonna have jason and his workshop like welding in slow motion and i'm gonna have him like sanding stuff do woodworking i'm gonna light it all nice and i'm gonna have this literally riding on top of my red camera and all my other cameras as i do like slider shots yeah can you just cold chew that on top of a camera yeah absolutely i totally could i i could get a little uh three eights to cold chew or quarter or whatever it is to cold chew adapter i could put it right on there or i could have little magic arms that i can put out there you just balance it so when are you going to get the shot where you take it and skip it across the surface of your pool and slam it slam it into the wall of the far side at 100 miles an hour i i already have that shot i could pull it out i just didn't uh i didn't post it i'm so excited about this i think as far as like people's first cinema camera or like introduction to it this is one of if not the best option that'll come out for people getting started in that world uh and it's just such a fun option especially when some cameras are coming out like cinema cameras and they're like i mean the the the cheapest red is seven thousand dollars you know the the the new fx5 got announced and i don't even know what the price of that thing is uh i have to imagine too for for traveling even bringing like a dslr with you know a moderate assortment of lenses if you're trying to travel and do like a shoot somewhere or something compared to that where it's literally like the tiniest pelican case thing that they make yeah you can just chuck it in your backpack or like fit it in your in your carry-on with the rest of your stuff you need like some of the new um sony cameras don't even come with lenses you just have to download them and hope that the uh license for them doesn't expire now wait a minute you wouldn't download a lens would you of course you would why not technically in the way when i got the uh the macro adapter for that one i guess i kind of downloaded that lens anyway so it's it's very cool and i think that people are gonna find a lot of cool things to use it for plus you're the first person that i know personally to have one yeah i'm the i'm the first person of the three here that has it we're the only ones you know i know more people personally than just us okay i have four pinned text conversations in my iMessage app i uh real quick health update i jumped off a diving board for the first time in like a year i my knee was i i got the jump what'd you break nothing almost my spine but because i landed a little bit harder on the deep end than i expected to so like my back was like hey but it's fine everything's fine you landed on the deep end like on the the bottom yeah well i didn't like my very first jump i was like well i'm not gonna like cannonball or anything i want to like have my knee hit first so i'll just like pencil jump in and you go down really fast and i was like my knee it feels great hits bottom of floor doesn't bend legs spine

16:52nice nice it's like better not bend my knees that'd be a terrible idea wait no it wouldn't so all my favorite football players say the moment you get hit what you want to do is stiff as a board made of stone nothing bends that way you survive with no injuries i should have i I always been my niece, man. Watching college basketball as a kid and I played basketball, a couple of those injuries where someone would jump to block something and land and not bend their leg and their leg would snap. I hate that so much. So whenever I did that, I was like, good thing there was water because that would have been the end of me otherwise.

17:26I'm starting to ramp up physical activity again. I can walk. I tried diving board and leg good. Leg good. I can't wait till I'm allowed to walk again. Ready? It is getting better. But I still have like a month minimum Of not really supposed to be walking at all Does that mean you can't like swim or anything too For however long? Not even at all I can barely take a shower Because I have the cast I have on I'm not supposed to get wet at all If it gets more than just droplets on it I'm supposed to go and have them replace it And yeah I mean I get replaced once a week anyway Because they cut it open and they have to look at the wound on my foot But oh my god Someday I'll be allowed to walk Like a human.

18:09It's nice. It's nice coming back after like two months of hobbling along. It was nice to like move again Someday. Hey, you guys want to play a game? Sure First I'm gonna flip a coin to see who gets to go first Lion is Wade. Lady is mark. Sure. This is a normal coin. Don't question it. I see lady I'm usually lady. So whatever he said at this time. I was like, oh, I'm not lady for once Today's game is gonna be called Would I Lie to You? Yes, yes, yes, ding, yes Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa I'm not the one who will be saying Would I Lie to You? Nor will I be the one who's lying You guys are gonna take turns And I'm gonna say because it's Mark's turn first I'm gonna give you, I'm gonna send you a message first The message is going to first say Whether the fact that I'm sending you Is true or false and then it's going to have a fact that I want you to say as convincingly as possible, or maybe as unconvincingly as possible.

19:10Is there just a list of accumulated facts and some of them are true and some of them are false, but all of them hopefully sound like they could be true or sound so silly, but are actually, you know, sound like they should be false, but they are true. I tried my best to get a range of facts. So I'm going to tell you, this is a lie or this is true. And then I'm going to send you the thing. And your job as the person who has to say the fact is obviously to totally ignore the first message I sent you and not let that play on your psyche at all. And then convincingly communicate the fact. Yeah. So no matter what, I'm just trying to say what you send as honestly as possible.

19:50Yeah. Unless maybe you know that it's true or like it's, you know, one of them is like the earth is round and you're like, well, okay. Yes. But you can try and say it deceptively. but like it's a game of reading each other you do have to have your eyes open for this one wade no wade you can close your eyes close your eyes wade this is true true or false i'm gonna try really hard not to send the message to the wrong person or say it out loud all right but mark here is your first fact and then uh wade observe focus all right so if you were to take every single bacteria on the planet and you were to stack them up on top of each other one single bacteria on top it would stretch for a single continuous line for 10 billion light years do you know what a light year is yeah i learned that from toy story 10 billion light years 10 billion light years that's so oddly specific i want to believe it's true but that sounds too big i don't even know what's the size of the universe is that like that's beyond the distance that we can perceive anything right because like what i don't know i don't know enough about like space and shit sorry i'm not participating in the game i'm just listening just sounds like a really big number sounds far if you said like to the moon or mars or something i'd be like oh that's crazy but 10 billion light years sounds unfathomable i'm gonna say false that one is true i meant true that means I win, right?

21:24Another way to phrase that would be to say that Earth's 0.001 millimeter long microbes could wrap around the Milky Way over 20 ,000 times if you like did it in a circle around the Milky Way. You know, even when he typed that to me, he was like, this is true. I really was like, that seems a lie. Even in my head, as I was saying, I was like, man, I'm trying to convince him that this is true. How do I how do I feel convincing? Because 10 billion light is a lot but then again there's a lot of bacteria on the planet i mean yeah there is but like i feel like the planet would have to be bigger to hold that much stuff but even like right here on the palm of my hand even if i've just washed it there's probably still going to be millions on my just my hand right yeah but like you don't stretch out your hands and all of a sudden you're slapping venus on the ass you know well i mean maybe maybe you don't look me and venus we're very close and if i want to slap venus on the ass with my hand of bacteria is that good for mark that i was wrong or does mark want why does he want me to be right the person stating the fact or or the lie is attempting to deceive right so mark won because he got he you said the wrong you chose the wrong answer and mark deceived you and the guesser wins when they accurately guess So you when you're picking true or false you want to be right because that means you were not deceived Well, how many times in a row could I possibly lose a coin flip anyway if I just you know a lot?

22:57Oh All right, wait, I'm sending you your factoid Mark wearing a tie can reduce blood blood flow to your brain by seven and a half percent Okay, I would believe that wearing a tie could reduce blood flow, but it's weirdly specific percentage. Seven and a half percent. How do you even measure? Is that like a known lie number or something? Oh, you're thinking about like... Yeah, like how would they determine that percentage? They use the metric system. Blood-mometer? What do they get, like London percent? What kind of other percents are there? They got like kilopercents? per centigrade is that where centigrade comes from yes yes man i'm gonna say it's false just based on seven and a half seems like a weird number i guess 10 billion light years also seems like a weird number but i'm just gonna say babe false that fact was true damn a study in 2018 found that wearing a necktie can reduce blood flow to your brain by up to seven and a half percent it could also increase the pressure in your eyes if your tie is on too tight um and also ties carry a lot of germs which i hadn't thought about until i put this together but do you wash your ties you ever washed a tie that's a good question i guess i i guess i haven't so how many functions have you worn that tie at where you maybe like shook hands with people or hugged people, you know, never gets I've owned ties for literally like almost two decades because I still have a couple ties that I got in like high school, middle school, high school era that I don't really wear because they're kind of old and beat up, but that's two decades worth of germs and shit soaked into that bad boy.

24:49That's crazy. So anyway, no one should wear ties because they're fucking gross. Yeah. And dress socks. You guys don't wash those, right? You don't wash dress socks? I've never washed a single item of clothing I've ever worn. Why would you? True I believe you True Alright Mark I wish I had thought of a more efficient way to do this And I'm not having trouble copying and pasting stuff There is your factoid Mark Oh I had this thought too Because both of the first two ones had numbers in them You don't have to say all the info that I send you If you think it will help you be deceitful Like if you thought 10 billion light years Was a lot of light years And you were hoping I guess you can't lie So that one you can't really But like for Wade's, you could just say it could reduce the blood flow to your brain.

25:34Can't lie. I can't add stuff you're making up necessarily, but you can leave if it's a complicated fact, you can leave stuff out. I got it. I got it. Okay. Wade, look down. Look at your hands. What do you see? Do you see the toil that the years have plagued them? Do you see how they've changed from when you were a child? Do you see how they have evolved? Yes. The story those hands tell. The places they've touched. The things they have grasped. Now look at your nails. Oh, God. Seem a little longer, don't they, huh? Yeah. Did you know your nails grow faster in summer? That feels awesome. Remember what nails are made of?

26:14Carrot juice or something? Yeah, yeah, carrot juice. And we get carrots in from not carrots, probably. I don't think so. Yeah, I think you're right. Carrots grow in the summer better than they grow in the winter. This is exactly where I hoped this game would go. Frosty, a lot hornier in the summer. while he's dying. His carrot nose. God, that feels so stupid. So I'll say true because I don't believe it. That one is true. It's true. And I think I know why. It's because your circulation is better in warmer weather. So in the summer, in the cold, your blood goes away from your extremities. But in the warm temperature, your blood goes to your extremities more readily.

26:55I think that's probably the only reason why it would grow faster. Did you reason that out yourself? because that's exactly what I got from the place where I outsourced that fact. I was also thinking, like, back years and years and years ago in the snow, if your nails would grow all summer, you'd have natural snow shovels for the winter. Now this guy's thinking. Now that is a thought. That is one thought. I thought that. He thought that. I believe that he thought that. True. Don't overheat yourself with all this thinking. Oh, God. I'm going to clip my nails, guys. It's getting too crazy in here.

27:27That's okay. wait i have sent you your factoid mark both hair and nails continue to grow after you die now i i actually know this one i know this one this is false you are correct this is false why do you know that yeah what the hell how many corpses are you hanging out with oh you know i've watched a lot of death in my time i've seen it up close i got my macro lenses on all the bodies that I see you after they pass. Um, I have extensive collections of footage, uh, from all kinds of angles of everything. Um, I have a library of it. So I, let's just say I'm well researched in the topics of death.

28:08That is one of those things they say though. Like whenever you're growing up, you'd like, I remember hearing it like, Oh yeah, your nails and hair will continue to grow. That was a thing. Yeah. So that, that is a thing, but I do know that that's false because originally as a kid, I was like, they, they said that and I was like, Whoa. And then I remember like i don't know probably a reddit post or something i was like there's no truth it's just because your skin recedes when you die well mark's just stealing all my thunder from everything that prevailing theory is that when you die your body begins to dehydrate which causes your skin to pull back and shrink which makes your nails and hair appear longer chokes on them i'll still be bald that'll be weird you die and then all of a sudden he's a miracle he's growing oh he did have hair in there he was just hiding it we find out that all the hair i thought wasn't growing was ingrowing and so it's just like afro tucked in like wait your forehead the wrinkles are starting to really come it's like no it's just the hair trying to escape the skin layer man i hate that i have a natural helmet of hair under my skin gross don't worry your fact is coming mark You like this one?

29:14Wait There There Might be a cure For evil

29:26I'm waiting for more That's a fact You could take that into the bank Well Psychopathy anyway Maybe I'm just gonna go with true because that's it's hard to disprove a negative so yeah I feel like I was set up for finish wiggle room in a mite now that I'm seeing it in context I see I see the issue with that one that you're right that is true I'd be pretty crazy if that was just straight up false I guess there's definitely definitely no cure for evil just kill those fuckers rehabilitation doesn't work proven in this one sentence anyway the way that was phrased is pretty unfortunate i was not gonna say any other word but there is research it's preliminary but those researchers suggest that computer-based cognitive training uh can help a person who is a psychopath experience empathy and regret assuming that those could be traits that are imparted and last beyond the therapy sessions effectively carrying them off being a psychopath because the thing about being a psychopath is that you don't feel empathy or regret or stuff, right?

30:38Yeah, so a lot of times with psychopathy, like, people are born with, like, the psychopathic trait. It doesn't mean anything comes of it, but if they actually become and start doing evil things, usually there's, like, a trigger in life. But from what I've understood, like, even at birth, the predisposition to psychopathy itself is already there, like, the not feeling of emotion. No, no, I've seen this in Dexter. How to turn a baby evil. You dip them in a puddle of blood That's it You remember, have you seen Dexter? That's it, that's all it takes As soon as a baby touches a puddle of blood They're evil, and they will kill I thought the blood of like 100 virgins was supposed to give you Eternal life or something, I thought it made you evil No, evil, straight up evil So there you go, the cure to psychopathy is just don't dip in blood We solved it That's it, yeah And then do the opposite of blood to become good Which is

31:34You know I don't want to say that's the opposite of blood I'm pretty sure that just makes the baby super evil I think that just goes further in the same direction There's a lot of problems with that thought experiment We should move on immediately Yep it's him he did it officers It was him I hope I'm pointing at Wade Whoa Sam make Mark point at himself Take this

31:57all right wade you have your factoid all right man mark did i have to read much at all i gotta go back to choose your own adventure it needs a little explanation because i wasn't sure i didn't know what this what this thing was so i wanted to make sure everyone was on the same page mark no a glass sponge is a deep sea animal with a skeleton made of silica The exact same material used to make glass Glass sponges can live for 15 ,000 years Okay, so we gotta evaluate a lot of things here Are there glass sponges? Okay, that's the first question I can confirm to you I will say that is true We can operate with the understanding That a glass sponge is a documented Real life deep sea creature This is one of those things where it's like If one is false then the whole thing is false of these oh yeah this is this is endgame blueprints boxes bullshit the explanation of the glass sponge was just to be clear that we're not deciding if the animal exists we're deciding how long they can live the factoid at issue is they can live for 15 000 years i'm not very good at looking to how these things are going to play out in practice i just throw shit at the wall no i like throwing mark a paragraph and be like is any of this false All right, we gotta look up if there's any like cave paintings of glass sponges.

33:16It was like a record of like - You think a lot of cave people were deep sea exploring? Jesus' pet glass sponge is still going on. His great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-grandson still has it. Oh, Timmy the sponge? I remember in the Old Testament, they were talking about - And then the eighth plague, the glass sponges rose from the ocean depth. Went into Egypt, really scratched up everything. When Jesus walked on water, he was actually just stepping across glass sponges, but no one could tell because they were clear. Yeah, they didn't notice he was going,

33:55It's a miracle. I bet wrong by thinking that a specific number was weird with seven and a half, so I'm going to do the opposite, and I'm going to run into a brick wall by doing it, I bet. And I'm going to say this is true, but I'm guessing it's not. but i'm saying it's true and of course this fact is true okay all right scientists actually hypothesize that these things could theoretically be immortal that they are alive but given the nature of their biology they kind of could live forever but obviously that's pretty tough to document given the linearity and stationarity of time uh but maybe someday we'll know if they do live forever.

34:40I didn't know this, but glass actually is, it's made up of silica, but not even the majority of it. I was under the impression that you could just melt sand and you would boom, get glass. That's not it. Yeah. Kind of the kind of same for modern glass. You need soda, ash and limestone, uh, to, to make it. And then other ingredients to melt down with it. Those things aren't clear at all. So if you get lime soda, you could just have all everything ready in one go. Yeah. Yeah, what he said. Wait, false. No. With the lime in the cocu nut. No, I'm not giving you a point for that. No. But actually, a lot of old glass was made of a material called mica because it's a naturally forming mineral that's transparent and you can cut it really easily into thin sheets.

35:24And it's like if you see old windows, they're brown. They have that brown and kind of rough texture to them. It's mica. That's really interesting knowledge. If you're gonna replace old glass make sure you get replace all of it though Cuz old glass kind of looks down on new glass because you know not really been around it understand the customs and traditions Yeah, I see where you're going with that. I don't I'm just saying yeah, yeah, yeah. Well good one mark Okay, good. That was a good one. Also you have your fact by definition a snakes body is a limb It's a penis

36:00Wait, it is now I know mine is but I don't know what the definition of a limb technically is. So like, well, you got the definition right there. By definition. Every time the Bengals score a touchdown, two snake bodies up, baby. Something about this just feels weird because a snake still has organs and digest shit. I don't know what the exact definition of a limb is. I'm going to say false. See, you forgot the tail. Nah, it's false. Oh, I was like, I mean, I could see it, but also that feels just not. Right. I don't know how it does if you don't know what a limb is, because honestly, this is this is one where, like, if that was true, I wouldn't even I would just be like, oh, that's really interesting, man.

36:45Being as I have to guess, it's like, well, that one feels just naturally true. So let me think about it for a minute. It's like, well, a snake's body literally you eat, digest it shits and pisses and all that stuff. It's like, I don't know that a limb is supposed to have those functions. I don't even know. Yeah. Let me look up the definition of limb, an arm, leg or wing of a person or animal. so tails tails aren't limbs some species have like prehensile tails so it's like it's not a limb but they can use it kind of like a limb okay oh interesting all right so apparently a tail is a limb if it's prehensile that is that is a separate but then again yeah this is just one of those things where scientists are defining things and we have to go with like oh pluto's not a planet okay pluto is a limb right i think that's the conclusion we can reach here A penis?

37:37Why do we all just start jerking off when we do that? I just unlock something in the male brain. All the listeners at home too were like You ever just realize that the audience is going to run with a joke really hard after we do it? No, you're in that moment. Oh yeah, your penis is a limb, right?