Get Over Yourself. Yeah…YOU with Dave Kerpen

0:01Boom! Shake the room, Fire Nation! JLD here and welcome to Entrepreneurs on Fire! Brought to you by the HubSpot podcast network, the audio destination for business professionals with great shows like Creator Science. Today, we'll be breaking down Getting Over Yourself. Yeah, you. To drop these value bombs, I brought to Dave Kerr Penn in the EO Fire Studios. Dave is a serial entrepreneur and New York Times bestselling author of five books, including Get Over Yourself, Lead and Delegate Better for more time, more freedom, and more success. And that's what we'll talk about today, Fire Nation, Good Delegation, Getting Over Fear and Trust Issues, The Five C's, and so much more.

0:40And a big thank you for sponsoring today's episode goes to Dave and our sponsors. Success Story, hosted by my friend Scott D. Clary, is brought to you by the HubSpot Podcast Network, the audio destination for business professionals. Success Story features Q &A sessions with successful business leaders, keynote presentations, and conversation on sales, marketing, business, startups, and entrepreneurship. In a recent episode, Scott brings Kate Bradley on the show, founder and CEO of Lately.ai, to discuss the best ways to use AI to create content. Listen to Success Story wherever you get your podcasts.

1:11Dave, say what's up to Fire Nation and share something that you believe about becoming successful that most people disagree with. What's up, Fire Nation? Great to reconnect. It's been so long. And one thing that most people disagree with is that your success is a function of how many hours you work in the day. That is a big, big mistake to think that you have to work a lot, a lot of hours to be successful. And that's actually one of the topics we'll be diving into deeply today, Fire Nation, when we get into the specifics on delegation. But first, it's all about getting over yourself, Fire Nation.

1:51Yeah, you, getting over it yourself. Because the reality is, Dave, there's delegation, and then there's good delegation. You found that good delegation is so difficult for people to achieve, so tell us more. I wrote this new book because in my experience over the last 15 years in building four or five different companies and coaching hundreds and hundreds of small business owners and entrepreneurs, I think the number one thing that people are challenged with is delegation. They either are afraid to delegate and they don't delegate to anyone. They think they have to do it all themselves. Or they delegate and then they micromanage.

2:34They're the worst possible delegator where they're trying to get people to do things exactly the way they want them. And they're checking in with them every five minutes and they're overbearing and difficult. And anyone that's ever worked for somebody else has had this experience of having a poor manager. And so I think that obviously that doesn't work. And then they turn around and then say, oh, I can't trust people. I can't delegate anymore. I think great delegation, when done right, allows you to have the freedom, the time, the ability to prioritize what's important in your life, and still allows you to be super successful.

3:14And I think that's why I wrote this book because I want to help as many people as possible delegate well. And Fire Nation, that's one of the questions I have for you is if you're going to actually hire somebody to take things off of your plate, why are you then going to stand over their shoulder and micromanage the crap out of them, annoying them, of course, and then just completely dismissing the whole benefit that you're possibly getting by this delegation? And I've always also found that when you have people take ownership of something, there's something called pride they have. Because guess what?

3:46If somebody fails when you're micromanaging them, they can still blame you because you're there micromanaging them. But if they fail when you're letting them do their thing, that's all on them. That's all on them. And people don't like to fail when it's all on them. But this kind of goes back to the fear issues and the trust issues that so many of us have. So Dave, how the heck do we overcome those issues? The biggest thing is recognizing them at first. So people make lots and lots of excuses for why they can't delegate, why they need to do the work themselves. I would challenge them to say, maybe it's more in your head here.

4:22Maybe it is something that you're afraid of. Maybe you don't have the ability to trust people right now. And if that is the case, then let's look honestly at those limiting beliefs. Let's look honestly at those emotional detractors, as I call them, and really take an honest look. Are you afraid of failure? Are you afraid that they won't do the job right? Are you afraid of losing clients? Do you have a difficult – have you been let down by people? I was coaching a guy just this morning, John, who said, everyone disappoints me. And I said, okay, let's examine that statement. What does that come from?

4:59It sounds like you've been disappointed in the past by people you've assigned work to. And now you have this statement that, quote, everyone disappoints you. But how can you possibly trust anyone if you're already going into it thinking that everyone disappoints you? So the first step is really identifying the emotional detractors that are holding us back, becoming more self-aware about them, and then tackling them head on. Here's the thing. Everyone is afraid. I have lots of fear. I was afraid that I'd show up for your podcast today and suck. And, you know, like I was once a pretty good guest and all of a sudden I would suck today.

5:36But guess what? I also have courage. So I am aware of my fears and then I act in the face of those fears. That's literally the definition of courage, John. So anyone out there that's struggling, that realizes, yes, I'm afraid to give this work to someone else. I'm afraid to bring in a partner. I'm afraid I can't trust someone here. Okay, that's okay. It's okay to be afraid. Identify it all and then figure out how you can act in the face of that fear, in the face of those trust issues, in the face of perhaps some issues that you might have around control and the need for things to be perfect. Those are the big things that hold people back.

6:14Fear, distrust, need for control, and need for perfectionism. Once you're aware of it and you can act in the face of it, that's literally the definition of courage. And I promise you, while everyone has fear, everyone also has the capacity to move through that fear through courage. Fire Nation, if you're not getting just a little fired up right now, check your pulse because this guy is spitting passion. He's spitting hearts and he's coming at you with fire. But guess what? That doesn't mean that he wakes up in the morning and just screams all day at the computer, just getting stuff done and grinding his face off.

6:50In fact, Dave, you believe that the hustle lifestyle is not worth it. It can actually be counterproductive for most people. So tell us more about that. I have a huge, huge amount of respect for folks like Gary Vaynerchuk and entrepreneurs that have been super, super successful through this idea of the hustle lifestyle. But I think that for many people, it can do them a real disservice. And people get caught up in their work and they get caught up in thinking that the more they hustle, the harder they work, the more hours they put in, the more likely it will be to be successful. And I think there's a major, major drawback to this, even if you are successful.

7:31And that drawback is, you know, you're successful at what cost, at what cost to your personal life, at what cost to your health, et cetera. In my book, I look at research that psychologists have done on people's deathbeds. Guess what? Do you know what percentage of people on their deathbed say, I wish I had worked harder. I wish I had worked more. I wish I had put in more hours. Virtually no one, nobody ever regrets not, you know, working hard enough. But you know how many people regret not spending more time with family, not spending more time pursuing their passions, not spending more time on their personal health.

8:15Many, many people have these regrets. So my point is, why hustle nonstop, 24-7, and get burned out? You may or may not be successful, but either way, you're going to get burned out. You're going to regret the time you lost with your family. You only have that time once. For me, it's all about setting very, very clear boundaries. I've been able to carve out a life for myself where at 3 p.m. every single day I pick my son off the bus. And we have homework time and play time. And I am not checking my email, John. You know, there is nothing that could come in between 3 p.m. and 7 p.m. that would be so urgent that I would need to abandon my family.

9:01And so for me, through delegation, through hiring great people, through partnering with great people, by the way, a lot of times people come to me, they say, I can't afford to hire people. Okay, guess what? I got two options for you. One is like use Upwork and Fiverr where you're paying people five bucks or 10 bucks, literally. Or two is find a partner that you can share some of the equity with that can do some of the high level work with you. There's nobody out there that doesn't have the ability to bring on either very, very low-level people that cost virtually nothing, or if you need high-level people, to share some of the pie and bring on a partner or multiple partners.

9:39Bottom line is, if you want to live the kind of life where you have the time and freedom to prioritize, I mean, look, maybe you're listening and you don't have kids. That's fine. But maybe you want to prioritize time to work on your health or work on your dating or travel the world. Those are things that you can't get back if you are working 24 seven on your business. So instead of the nonstop hustle, take a step back and think about your priorities and make sure that you are nailing what's most important to you in life. Fire Nation, so many value bombs here. The first thing I want to address is, guess what?

10:14For those of you that were a little nervous about not checking your email between 3 p.m. and 7 p.m., I bet Dave is actually more productive between nine and three because he knows that three to seven is off limits, he will get stuff done because time will expand or tasks will expand to the time allotted. Think about that. Tasks will expand to the time allotted. You will get stuff done in four to five hours if you give yourself four to five hours or if you give yourself nine hours, it'll probably take nine hours. So productivity actually increases when you give yourself those type of parameters.

10:45And I love that you brought up Gary V because for me, that's actually an example that I give is some people are born to grind their face off. Not many people, but some small percentage are born to grind their face off and they're just unhappy when they're not. And that's the Gary V's of the world. And I salute them. I am Gary V 180. I'm on the opposite side of the spectrum. I literally work hard one day per week, Thursdays. That's the day that I'm recording seven back-to-back interviews for Entrepreneurs on Fire. The other six days of the week, I'm hanging out with my son, Bo. He's four months old.

11:15Time goes fast. Like that's what I'm focused on at that point. Health, wellness, like Dave mentioned here, key, key stuff to think about. And we have a lot more to talk about around these topics when we get back from thanking our sponsors. You know your customers want fast, personalized support, but how do you find a customer service solution that actually delivers? Most solutions leave reps struggling to stay productive and customers frustrated by the lack of support. But with the new AI-powered Service Hub from HubSpot, you've now got a better way to do service and success. Service Hub helps you fly through the service queues and lighten the load on your reps with AI-powered self-service chat and knowledge-based articles.

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12:28Dave, we're back and you created something called the five C's. It's a system. Let's go through it now. Yeah. So the five C's of empowered delegation, I call it, it's, um, you know, I like acronyms and it's easy to remember. So we're thinking about what to delegate. First, I have a model called the share model, which is you should be, as an entrepreneur or business leader, focused on three things and three things alone. S, the strategy and vision for your company. H, hiring the right people. And A, assuring that you have enough resources and cash in the bank to pay people. S, H, and A. Strategy, hiring, assuring that you have enough resources.

13:11Then you need to R, remind yourself that everything else needs to be delegated, and E, empower the right people. So let's talk about the C's model. The first thing is to choose carefully the right person or team to delegate the work to. This is probably the most important thing. The biggest mistake people make here, John, is they choose the first person that's around. Okay, you might have one person working for you that may or may not be the right person for the job. If they are the right person, great. If not, you've got to hire someone, you've got to outsource it, find a contractor, find a vendor, find an agency, find a freelancer, lots of opportunities there.

13:48The next C is to communicate clearly, ideally both verbally and in writing with a quick email, the intended outcome. Now, some people like to communicate the step-by-step instructions. If you're a control freak, I get it. For me, I'm all about the intended outcome. What is going to be successful here? You can get there any way you want, but here's the outcome that I need. Step three is to coach and cheer the person on to their version of success. I write a lot about the difference between a manager and a coach. Nobody likes a manager. Everybody likes a good coach. So if you think of yourself as less of a manager and more of a coach, and how can you coach and cheer on your employee to successfully completing the task, that will have a much better outcome for you.

14:36Number four is to check in regularly. Regularly does not mean every 10 minutes. It probably doesn't mean daily, although some tasks might require daily check-ins. For me, the cadence is usually once a week check-ins, 10-minute check-ins with the person that I've assigned the project to, making sure that they have everything they need to accomplish the job, helping them with any challenges that they might have, and continuing to coach and cheer them on. And then the fifth C, once the project is done, and this is often forgotten as well, congratulate them, give them some feedback on how it could be done even better next time, and celebrate success together.

15:15That is the five C's of empowered delegation. Fire Nation, straight value bombs once again. And the best part about a podcast, hit the rewind 30 second button a few times. You can listen to it again. It is there for you. It'll be on the show notes page. Make it happen. And Dave, we talked a lot about delegation today. So I want to really drill down into the benefits of delegation for those very few people out there listening that aren't 100 % convinced. Let's get to 100 % right now. The number one benefit, again, and you've done such a great job of this yourself, and many great entrepreneurs have.

15:53I'm very proud of the fact that, again, for 3 o 'clock on, I'm not working every day. The major benefit of delegation is having that time back to yourself. And you can use that to spend with your family. You can use that for your personal life. You can use that for travel. You can use that to write. I've written five books because I've delegated lots. You know, there's certain things that aren't able. It's very hard to delegate. It's very hard to delegate working out. You can't delegate working out. You can't delegate reading. You can't delegate writing. You can't delegate or, you know, writing your own thoughts.

16:28You can't delegate time with your children. Those are the activities that you give yourself back when you can delegate. The second thing, we haven't talked about this at all, but it's very arrogant that people think that they're the best person for the job. It's actually kind of silly if you think about it. Why in the world are you the best person in the world for the job? I'm getting this guy I'm coaching this morning. I'm going to I won't mention his name to keep him anonymous. I don't want to embarrass him. He's managing like a set of apartments. And he's like, well, like only I can do this.

17:06And I'm like, OK, give me an example of a task. He goes, well, choosing the color of the garages to paint. And I was like, really, you're really the best person in the world to choose the color of the garages. There isn't somebody with an aesthetic, an artist, a designer, an architect, somebody out there that's better at it than you. By delegating, you actually tap into experts, people that are going to be much, much better at stuff than you are. So you're going to end up with a much better outcome for the work at hand than you would get if you were trying to do it on your own. And ultimately, there is no scale without a team.

17:44You cannot do things on your own. So for anyone out there that wants to build something meaningful, something scalable, something long-lasting, the only real solution is delegating to others and letting others in to be part of your team to do the job. Get over yourself. Lead and delegate better for more time, more freedom, more success. Dave, why does Fire Nation need to read this book? I hope that if you read the book, you will be able to live a life with more purpose and meaning. You will be able to have that time back to spend with your family, to spend on yourself. and if you're looking to really scale something and grow something long-lasting as well as have that time back for your family you'll get the tools and resources to tackle your fear your trust issues your control issues to tackle the mental roadblocks that are keeping you from becoming an effective delegator and an effective leader and to choose to delegate to get through those challenges to choose to delegate and to be able to spend your life in a much, much more meaningful way than perhaps you're spending it today, John.

18:54And what is your call to action? Where can Fire Nation get this book? Books everywhere. Amazon, bookstores everywhere. GetOverYourselfBook.com is the website for more information about the book. And I also do free office hours. I've been doing this for 12 years. Anyone that wants to chat with me for free, I do pro bono office hours every Thursday afternoon from two to three, scheduledave.com and absolutely no strings attached. I'm happy to chat with anyone that wants to build a business, delegate better, write a book, any way that I could be helpful. I just did the math on this. I've met with 835 people since I started doing this and coached some folks to success.

19:33So happy to chat that way. Google me, Dave Kirpin. I'm everywhere. And if I can be helpful to any of your listeners, John, I am delighted to be. Fire Nation, jump on that. I'm sure some of you have in past interviews we've done with Dave. But remember, 301, he's off. He's with his son, and he's not going to have any conversations with you. But from two to three, he will. So remember, you're the average of the five people you spend the most time with. And you've been hanging out with DK and JLD today, so keep up the heat. For links to everything we talked about, visit eofire.com. Type Dave in the search bar, and the show notes page will pop right up.

20:07And Dave, thank you for sharing your truth, your knowledge, your value with Fire Nation. For that, we salute you and we'll catch you on the flip side. Hey, Fire Nation, a huge thank you to our sponsors and Dave for sponsoring today's episode. And Fire Nation, what can 4 ,000 of the world's most successful entrepreneurs teach you? How about how to achieve financial freedom and fulfillment? My first traditionally published book, The Common Path to Uncommon Success, is a revolutionary 17-step roadmap that will lead you to the lifestyle you've been dreaming about. This book took me 10 years of accumulating the genius of the world's top entrepreneurs, and you can get it all in one place when you visit UncommonSuccessBook.com.

20:48I'll catch you there or on the flippity-flip side. Success Story, hosted by my friend, Scott D. Clary, is brought to you by the HubSpot Podcast Network, the audio destination for business professionals. Success Story features Q &A sessions with successful business leaders, keynote presentations, and conversation on sales, marketing, business, startups, and entrepreneurship. In a recent episode, Scott brings Kate Bradley on the show, founder and CEO of Lately.ai, to discuss the best ways to use AI to create content. Listen to Success Story wherever you get your podcasts.