"Get Un'flipped" & Learn To Perform At Your Peak with Wylie McGraw: An EOFire Classic from 2021

0:01Light that spark fire nation JLD here and welcome to entrepreneurs on fire the only daily show interviewing the world's top entrepreneurs seven days a week. Today, we're pulling a classic episode from the archives, and we'll be breaking down how to get unflipped and learn how to perform at your peak. To drop these value bombs, I brought Wiley McGraw into EO Fire Studios. A former pitcher, bull rider, and combat veteran, Wiley's work is the Navy SEAL training equivalent to high-performance development, pushing leaders beyond their limits so they can hit their peak daily. And today, Foundation, we talk about peak performance being a state that we need to attain, not a destination to achieve, and allow yourself to be more vulnerable and surrender to things that challenge you and owe so much more.

0:46And a big thank you for sponsoring today's episode goes to Wiley and our sponsors. Is now the time to grow a successful business? Attend the world's highest rated business growth workshop taught personally by Clay Clark and now featuring football star Tim Tebow and President Trump's son, Eric Trump, at thrivetimeshow.com slash EOFire. Again, request life-changing tickets today at thrivetimeshow.com slash EOFire. Wiley, say what's up to Fire Nation and share something that you believe about becoming successful that most people disagree with. Hey, John, Fire Nation, thanks for having me here. That's a great question.

1:27The one thing that I will say when it comes to success that I believe that most people would disagree with is that despite the fact that success can be subjective, we're convinced that this metric in which we define it resides in the ability to scale and make money and achieve a certain level of notoriety. So that means how big our business can be built. Do people know who I am? And there I will then expand into other areas of my life. But first and foremost, I need to be able to make money, grow my business, and therefore I can claim the title of success. And for me, that's kind of the cart before the horse, if you will.

2:05So it's the idea of make money, grow business first, and then maybe help some people second. And I look at it as you should be focusing on self-optimization, living your life from a place of peace and freedom, and then building from that state of being and then see how your results will be exponential and highly sustainable. Wiley, we all hear this phrase so casually thrown around, peak performance. But in your definition, what is peak performance for real? For real. Yeah. I'm glad that you said that, John, because it is tossed around. It is a bastardized term, marketing utilized to sell people on coaching, consulting, advising.

2:48and I approach life understanding dynamics and looking at how well someone is living their life. And peak performance is not something that can be defined by compartmentalized thinking. It's not about how much you can innovate, execute, or accumulate. And it actually has little to do with your ability to stay on track to complete tasks. That's actually called achievement. Performance itself is dynamic. It's complex, just as any individual is. So we cannot simply bounded by the quantifiable and can't be caged in some form of strategic milestones or limited by society's definitions. Your peak performance is a state of being that's exclusive to you.

3:25So when I throw out the word peak performance, it's understanding a state that we're able to attain, not a destination to achieve. And when it comes to peak performance, holistically, you have to look at every area of your life. If it is operating holistically at the same level, that is the term I define in peak performance. If you're able, John, and the audience is listening to make a buttload of money and have some fame, but yet your relationships are suffering, your health is suffering, you are not feeling fulfilled or at peace, you're constantly in the grind, that is not peak performance. That just is a state of achievement.

4:03So I hope that answers your question. It does, but I do at the same time want to dive deeper because there are just so many coaching programs out there that promise, quote unquote, high performance development for both individuals and teams in general. And you actually believe that many, if not most, are highly, ultimately unproductive. Why is that? Well, I will say that they all have their place. And I'm not saying that there aren't results that are had when people invest in those types of programs, those coaches, those consultants. I've seen it time and time again. I've worked behind the scenes for the last 13 years across industries with different leaders, public figures, etc.

4:43And it does create some movement. And I have a paper that I wrote called Helping Versus Optimizing. And understanding the difference is key to really achieving that level of peak performance that you long for. So when I say that they're unproductive, what I'm talking about is it gets people down the road, but people are still left grinding for more. They're still left feeling unfulfilled at the end of the day. They might say that they're not in public, but behind the scenes, they're really kind of struggling to figure out what's next. What more do I need to do? There's this level of imbalance that happens where they're trying to accomplish a place of feeling satisfied in what they're doing, but they're always left on that never-ending quest to get to where they really want to go, which is why we have hundreds of billions of dollars spent in personal development every year and people constantly trying to emulate and mimic other high-level people thinking that they're somehow going to attain that level of success.

5:36So when I say it's unproductive, I'm looking at it from the perspective of and the fact of what is right for that person and does it optimize their life first or is it just another set of steps, systems, and processes that are sold to them that they can follow that create some movement but yet still ultimately leave them feeling limited in their ability to achieve high levels of success? Don't get stuck on a never ending quest, Fire Nation. It is not the path you want to be on. And Wiley, this is a family friendly show. So I'm going to update your tagline just a little bit here, but I think everybody's going to get the picture.

6:12What does it mean to get unflipped? Yes. And I think we can all can grasp that. So what it means, I appreciate that. And thank you for at least letting me know too, just in case I'm ex-military. So sometimes little words can pop out. Oh, back at you, brother. Oh, yeah, I know you are. Thank you for your service, by the way. Same to you, man. Absolutely. So what that means is we talk about this constantly. I hear it on the podcast I listen to or the books I've read in the past or people I've talked to or the leaders I've worked with. I mean, I've worked with some of the people you've interviewed or known.

6:45And we always hear people talking about doing the deep inner work. It's always sold as like, you have to do the deep inner work. But yet at the end of the day, when it comes down to doing the true deep work that requires you to be optimized, people are scared of real transformation. They like to control to a certain degree the resources that they hire and bring into their lives that give them some level of feeling like things are changing. There is some level of discomfort in that process or that coaching program or whatever they're looking to invest in, but they're not fully surrendering to the unknown of it.

7:18They're not allowing themselves to be the most vulnerable. And therefore, that's where the unresolved stresses reside. The unconscious patterns of doubt, fear, and cautiousness that were created over life's bad experiences that we have basically held on to that we've never addressed. I call them battling your demons. So until you actually have someone that can get into the trenches with you and make you face in real time in the real right environment in relationship to make you face and battle those demons head on so you can eradicate them, you're always going to still be struggling to find out why your life does not feel the way you actually want it to.

7:53Oh, I have made all this money yet. I still feel like my wife doesn't like me and my kids don't respect me. My health is suffering. I still feel that pain every morning when I wake up. So what it means, John, and for Fire Nation, is really looking at every aspect of your life holistically and being able to eradicate unresolved stress that you have not addressed your entire life and realize that you need to first achieve self-mastery and you need to build from that place, not on the back of your stress and your pain. So when you can wake up in the morning and not feel bad anymore and you feel fulfilled and you're in contentment and you're allowing yourself to be able to handle whatever's still in your way or whatever you put your focus on.

8:33That is what it actually means to get unflipped. You're operating from a full state of optimization. Unflipped. Appreciate that as well. And yes, it's one of those things where you spend enough time in the military. I was eight years as an army officer, specifically a tank commander. We had some choice phrases of things we like to say when things got a little rough and tumbled. So definitely appreciate keeping it family friendly. You were up, I know where you were at, I think, in Kentucky, correct? Is that where you were stationed? That's where Armor Officer Basic is. So I spent 12 months there, but then I did my major tour in Fort Riley, Kansas.

9:11Kansas. Yeah. I was with the 101st Airborne Division, Combat and Infantry. So I understand. Hoorah. Well, Fire Nation, we're going to be getting some really impressive content from Wiley when we get back from thanking our sponsors. Is this your year to grow a successful business? Are you looking to learn the proven processes and success systems that have been used to create thousands of millionaire success stories? See thousands of success stories and testimonials from real people just like you who Clay Clark has mentored and coached into prosperity at thrivetimeshow.com slash EOfire. Clay's proven business coaching program is month to month and it costs less money than hiring a minimum wage employee.

9:51Yes, it's month to month and it costs less money than hiring a minimum wage employee. Schedule your free personal 13-point assessment with Clay Clark himself today at thrivetimeshow.com slash EO fire. Because Clay only takes on 160 clients and only allows 300 attendees to each business conference, you will interact with Clay directly. See thousands of real success stories and learn about attending the Thrive Time Show two-day in-person workshop featuring football star Tim Tebow and President Trump's son, Eric Trump, today at thrivetimeshow.com slash EO fire. Become the next success story. Schedule a free consultation and request tickets to join football star Tim Tebow and President Trump's son, Eric Trump at Clay Clark's next business conference today at thrivetimeshow.com slash EO fire.

10:39Wiley, we're back and you believe there are five, count them five characteristics that leaders have to embrace if they're going to attain peak performance. Let's break those down. Absolutely. So in the why you need to get unflipped paper that I also wrote on my anti-retreat page. It talks about these contrasts, these five major contrasts. What we are swimming in out in the world of leadership development, high performance, personal development is an unfortunate focus on deflection, addition, relief, transference, and helping. The five characteristics that people, leaders, high achievers need to truly evolve into and understand and embrace to really stand on the precipice of high performance sustainably is acceptance, removal, resolution, transformation, and then optimization.

11:36And what I mean by that is, instead of deflecting things that are highly uncomfortable, that challenge you at every step of the way, that make you feel a little out of whack in the moment, you need to learn how to accept when those types of situations or relationships come to you and the timing in which they're coming to you. And when we move on to removal versus the addition, we are so bent on the idea that the more strategies, the more systems, the more processes we add into our life, the more successful we become. But nobody is focusing on removal, removing what occupies space within your mind, within you energetically and emotionally, so that you actually can have more capacity expansion to be able to then add in certain things that make sense for your growth.

12:19Moving on to resolution. Relief is what we chase. We hear it all the time, John, and I know Fire Nation hears this too, is I'm going to have a hard day. It's stressful. It's chaotic. And at the end of the day, I'm going to try to find some relief, whether it be going to yoga, doing meditation, even maybe having a glass of whiskey, whatever your choice is to find that relief doesn't create real resolution. And you need resolution, first and foremost, if you're going to be able to have the capacity to grow and be fully optimized in your life. And that then leads into real transformation and not just the transference.

12:51We go to events, concerts, we go to parties, we get motivated by speakers. What's happening there, John, is they're transferring their motivational spirit into the audience and people feel high for a short period of time and feel excited about the opportunity that they can take on what they're being taught and go do it for themselves. but then they end up crashing at the end of the day and they want more of that. I'm talking about transformation. Consider a piece of coal turning into a diamond. When you have heat and you have pressure and that coal is in that chaotic environment, it can change that crumbly substance into one of the most powerful, strongest substances, one of the most coveted substances in the world, a diamond.

13:29But if you take away heat, all you do is create change. You just turn it from solid into maybe a crumbled mess of dust. And the last piece is the final aspect of it all, which is optimization rather than just spending your time on the roller coaster ride of being helped along the way. It's finding the right environments, the right resources that can challenge you in ways you've never been challenged, make you face things you've never been faced, and actually push you through your limitations no matter what it looks like, what it feels like, or however it shows up, and realizing that by embracing that is where your life can truly transform to the top of your game.

14:02So just to reiterate, it's acceptance, removal, resolution, transformation, and then optimization that needs to be embraced as a characteristic for leaders, high achievers, anybody on the path to their own success in life so that they can actually feel what it's like to be at the top of their game. That may be a rewinder, Fire Nation. I mean, listen again to that entire concept and really absorb those value bombs. And to really end with a bang, can you, Wiley, give us a specific example of what it looks like in the real world to perform at our peak and, most importantly, stay there? Oh, absolutely.

14:41So, you know, it can be very subjective as well. You don't wake up feeling worried, stressed, overwhelmed about anything or everything you must get done for the day. You feel alive, excited, at peace. there's no more of a grind or the sensation like you need to prove or scale uncontrollably. There's this balance to your innovation and desire, not just how big can I make it. You understand that you're no longer compensating with things, that you have no more unresolved, I call them chronic stresses that reside within you. You have faced them and you've eradicated them. You know who you really are at the core without all of that pain, sacrifice and suffering that you have endured to get to your level of success.

15:26So it means your state of being is what my professional athletes that I've worked with call being in the zone, no matter what comes at you or what you put your focus on. There's that level of contentment and fulfillment in your health, your relationships, and your life no longer feels like this constant worry of what's next, what else do I need to get done? So your ability to manage those inner and outer volatility becomes an asset to your performance and your creativity then further as a result in a byproduct is not born from stress or pain or fear. It's born from a place of pure peace and freedom.

15:59That's what it means to be at the top of your game and to sustain it. A lot of people talk about freedom, but a lot of people don't also combine that with the word peace. So I love how you did that. Peace and freedom, Fire Nation. Think about that. That's something to strive for. And Wiley, you shared a number of value bombs throughout this entire interview, take a step back, ponder on what you think is the one value bomb that you really want to make sure our listeners walk away with. What is that message that Fire Nation is really going to get from our conversation today? Then share how we can connect with you, any call to action you might have for us, and then we'll say goodbye.

16:37Absolutely. So one of the most important things that I embrace consistently every single day and have my entire life since my sports, the bull riding, even the military, was yielding to the fear of the unknown. We're never going to get rid of fear itself. We can manage the natural energy of fear that we are born with that is part of our nature of being human beings. It's part of our survival. So if you can yield to the fear of the unknown, especially when it comes to your own growth, your own leadership development, and you can start to allow yourself to become more vulnerable and surrender to things that challenge you in a way you least expect it and find value, even if you don't pursue it, but find value in those moments, in those relationships.

17:20You will find that just by taking that action, yielding to the fear of the unknown, things can start to actually change in your life. And then you will see your decision-making becomes more optimal. And for me, John, in Fire Nation, I don't do marketing lists. I don't do sales funnels. It's all about direct connection. If people feel inspired just to want to pick up the phone and have a conversation, that is the only call to action I have. They can find me at timetoerupt.com and move around through the website that we put together after 13 years of being behind the scenes. And LinkedIn.com forward slash Wiley McGraw is another place that I'm operating at at this moment.

17:57But if you like what I say, you feel inspired, it doesn't matter if we end up doing anything together. Just pick up the phone and call. You'd be surprised by taking that action and in itself is a challenge to actually have a conversation in real time and see what actually transpires for you. I mean, Fire Nation, when somebody offers their time, their most precious commodity, you take action. So if someone does want to pick up the phone, Wiley, what do they do? They just call and have a real conversation. They want to bring questions and we want to know more. They want to dig into it. They say, hey, this is what I felt by listening to you.

18:29I felt inspired, but something was stirring up inside me. It doesn't matter what they bring to the table. I'm all about real relationship connections. It's how I do my work. I only work with a handful of leaders per year. It's an intimate relationship. That's the way in which I'm able to radically transform the clients I work with. And even if people that want to have a conversation and just explore it, there's a lot of value in that in itself. So I'm just saying my contact information is on that website there. Feel free to pick up the phone. Call. That's what I'm here for. Timetoerupt.com, Fire Nation.

19:00Find the contact information. It's there in plain sight. And pick up the phone. call. Wiley is offering his most precious resource, time. And you're the average Fire Nation of the five people you spend the most time with. You've been hanging out with Wiley and JLD today. So keep up the heat and head over to eofire.com and type Wiley in the search bar and the show notes page will pop up with everything that we've talked about here today. Wiley, thank you for your service, for sharing your truth, your knowledge, your value with Fire Nation today. For that, We salute you and we'll catch you on the flip side.

19:35Likewise, John. Thank you all. I appreciate it. Hey, Fire Nation. Today's value-bound content was brought to you by Wiley and Fire Nation. Are you ready to rock your very own podcast? Check out our free podcasting course where I will teach you how to create and launch your podcast for, you guessed it, free. Visit freepodcastcourse.com. That's freepodcastcourse.com. And I'll catch you there or on the flippity flip flip flop side. Is now the time to grow a successful business? Attend the world's highest rated business growth workshop taught personally by Clay Clark and now featuring football star Tim Tebow and President Trump's son, Eric Trump at thrivetimeshow.com slash EO fire.

20:20Again, request life changing tickets today at thrivetimeshow.com slash EO fire.

20:31Thank you.