Lead Like You Mean It: Speaking Truth and Leading with Heart in a World That Wears Masks with Melissa Dawn

0:01Boom! Shake the room, Fire Nation! JLD here and welcome to Entrepreneurs on Fire! brought to you by High Level, the all-in-one sales and marketing platform. Today, we'll be breaking down lead like you mean it, speaking truth and leading with heart in a world that wears masks. To drop these value bombs, I brought to Melissa Dawn and the EO Fire Studios. Melissa is a master certified coach, bestselling author, and founder of CEO of Your Life. She guides retreats and executive leaders with this message, lead with heart, not just strategy. In today, Foundation, we'll talk about the moment Melissa realized that she was wearing a mask.

0:35We'll talk about the turning point. We'll talk about heart-centered leadership, speaking with clarity and care, and oh, so much more. And a big thank you for sponsoring today's episode goes to Melissa and our sponsors. Did you know Shopify is the commerce platform behind 10 % of all e-commerce in the US? If you want to see less cars being abandoned, it's time for you to head over to Shopify. Sign up for your$1 per month trial and start selling today at shopify.com slash on fire. Are you ready for the ultimate all-in-one platform for entrepreneurs, marketers, coaches, and agencies? Build funnels, automate follow-ups, manage clients, and even white label your own software.

1:18Say hello to our featured partner, High Level, and visit highlevelfire.com to start your free trial today. Melissa, say what's up to Fire Nation and share something that you believe about becoming successful that most people disagree with? I don't know if most people disagree with it, but a lot of people don't realize that becoming successful is really about working on yourself. You know, all the personal growth facing, all your fears going into those dark places because you can't really move forward if you have the past hanging over you. And Fire Nation, that's why today we're going to talk about leading like you mean it, speaking truth and leading with heart in a world that wears masks.

2:02Now, I want to start by talking about the moment but that you realized that you were wearing a mask, Melissa, and what finally helped you come back to wholeness? You know, it's so interesting because when I started coaching around 14 years ago, coaching school is great and they teach you a whole new way of communicating with people. So asking powerful questions and, you know, when you start playing with these powerful questions and asking people, you know, what's really important to you? How do you feel about that? People are so shocked by the questions and they love talking. And I said, this is like a superpower asking questions.

2:36And it's great when you're coming for a coaching session and your coach is asking questions. But I brought it into my personal life as well. I started asking coaching questions 24-7. I'm like, I want to be a rescuer. I want to save the world. I want to help everybody. And for a long time, I got away with it, not realizing that I was wearing a coaching mask everywhere I was going. up until a few years ago when I was with a group of coaches people that had done just as much work on themselves as I had called it out and they're like um you can't wear this coaching mask with coaching with coaches we see through you and I was so shocked because I was so used to wearing it that it was like a part of my identity that I didn't really understand what they meant it took me a few weeks to really get it and to debrief with then my coach about, you know, how to really come in as who you authentically are in all situations.

3:34So yeah, that was, I think, I think from what I know of right now, the final coaching mask was, was the final mask I, I believe that I shed. Now you had a turning point that led you to create both a life and business that was rooted in truth and alignment. Tell us that story. That story was started around 15 years ago. I still remember sitting on my wooden living room floor with my hands, holding my head up saying, how the heck did I get here? Now I had just had my second divorce and I had primary custody of my son who was then four years old and had always been successful successful professionally but obviously personally not so much and I had to start thinking like I didn't want to move I didn't want to displace him I wanted to keep his life as stable as possible and I started thinking about different careers I can do and someone recommended that I see a life coach so as soon as I said that I went home I googled I interviewed a few coaches and within 48 hours I started my first journey with my first life coach and she was taking me out of my comfort zone and asking me all these questions and doing all these exercises that were really out there and I was sharing everything I was learning with everyone around me and within six months I was in a totally different place.

5:01I got a promotion, I had better relationships, I was feeling much more fulfilled and the people I was sharing these exercises with also started to have shifts and I'm like I can't believe that there's so many simple tools that are out there that people don't know about that could totally change their lives so I decided that I was a VP marketing at the time I would start doing my coach training at night and I slowly build up my business from there and I called it CEO of your life because I wanted to help as many people as possible have the tools they needed to create the lives that they truly wanted.

5:38Now, one thing that you've come to believe is that heart-centered leadership actually drives performance. It drives retention. And, you know, it really has real impacts on everything that it touches. So, you know, this is even more so true in times of change. Tell us more about that and maybe give us an example. You know, I always say that good leaders don't just lead with strategy. They lead with heart because people want to feel seen, they want to feel heard, and strategy alone doesn't do that. And if you look at some great examples of leaders that led through this, we can think of like Jacinda Ardern.

6:13You know, when she was leading through COVID, she wasn't just leading with strategy, she was being open, she was being vulnerable, she was admitting, you know, heart centers leaders are about being real, not about being perfect. You know, she was okay to say, I'm not sure what's going on, but I'm doing my best to address it. And you could see that everybody was along with her for the journey and fully trusted her because she was being honest and transparent and leading from the heart. Give us another example of a situation where you really feel like that's really just shown for our listeners, Fire Nation.

6:49One of my favorites is Howard Schultz, the former CEO of Starbucks. I mean, he really led by his values. He was one of the first American CEOs that gave stock options to the baristas, part-time employees. You know, when there was immigration issues in the U.S. in 2017, and they were cutting down on it, he pledged to hire 10 ,000 refugees globally over a period of five years, he really stood for his values and he really cared about what was best for everybody. And he really proved to the world that when you lead with heart, um, while holding a clear strategic vision, that it can be both transformational and profitable.

7:39I love that story. And I actually love the biography of Howard. I mean, it's such a great one when they really break down, you know, where he came from, how he created Starbucks, you know, When he left, actually, that was a really interesting story as a CEO. And then when he came back, it was really powerful too. And I think there's a lot that you can learn from that transition, Fire Nation, about for Howard, what really mattered? And then for other heart-centered leaders, what really matters? And we have a lot more to talk about around this topic when we get back from thanking our sponsors. Shopping online has become so easy, which is great, especially around the holidays.

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10:10On top of it all, their support team is second to none and has your back every step of the way. Seriously, every question that pops up, they will have your answer waiting. And if you visit my special partnership link, you'll get a free trial. So visit highlevelfire.com to start your free trial and see why thousands of businesses are switching. That's highlevelfire.com where marketing, sales, and automation finally come together. High level, join the revolution. Melissa, we're back and I want to dive into why. Why speaking with clarity and care matters more now than it ever has before? Well, I think once COVID happened, the whole world started to change.

10:51And, you know, more people started asking about why am I doing what I'm doing? Am I really leading with purpose? More people started to leave their jobs, want to do things that had much more purpose because they didn't know how much time they had left. So the world is changing. The younger generation is also leading with much more purpose. They're not as impressed with titles and big offices. So now more than ever to really get people on board, you really have to treat people as people, not treat them as objects, you know, not just see them as the task that they're performing, but see them as a whole human being.

11:29And by doing that, you know, by thinking about, you know, how can I make this person's life better? What do they need right now? Do they need clarity? Do they need compassion? Do they need encouragement? Do they need challenge? You know, really think about what they need and helping them out on their journey is what's going to gain trust and what's really going to help you have a loyal following so that you can move things forward. Now, I want to talk about the hidden costs of playing it safe because a lot of people are doing this right now. And, you know, frankly, it's hurting them. So how can we start shifting from fear to authenticity?

12:05Well, something you have to keep in mind is that when leaders play safe, they lose influence. So if you want to think of an example of that, there was John Scully, the former CEO of Apple. He basically maintained the status quo and innovation slowed and market share slowed. And then he basically left and they had to bring Steve Jobs back. So that's an example of what happens when you play it safe. And then when you are actually leading from your heart and you are being transparent and you are addressing things as they are, it was another great leader that did this, the leader of Ford in 2006, for some reason, I can't remember his name.

12:48But he brought in the red traffic, the traffic light system. I don't know if you heard of it. so it was a time where um the company was losing so much money and he came in and he was asking in his leadership meetings like tell me what's going on but everybody was saying everything was great so he instilled like the the traffic light system and he said to the leaders you know if everything is going well you hold up the green light if things are so so you hold up the yellow light and if things are really not going well you hold up the red light so and i think his first two meetings Everybody held up green lights saying that everything was great.

13:26And then he finally said, like, how can we be losing billions of dollars and all of you are having a green card up? And finally, somebody put up a red card. And when he did, everybody held their breath like, oh, my goodness, what's going to happen? Is he going to get fired? And instead, the CEO turned on and said, OK, tell us what the challenge is. And he shared his challenge. And then he looked around the room and said, who here can help him with that? So it changed the whole dynamic about, you know, helping and sharing. And the next week when he asked how things were, most of the people had the courage to put up the red card and say things were not going well.

14:08And that's how he changed Ford around. And at a time where a lot of companies, car companies were taking government bailouts, they didn't need to take one. so it's really about not playing safe about doing things uh differently about speaking up about what's not working because otherwise you're just wasting your energy like nothing's gonna change was that alan mulali yes yes thank you i had a memory blank yes you got very cool yeah he was a ceo um from 2006 till 2014 and yeah definitely uh had a major turnaround happen for ford for sure And I think it's really interesting when you're giving these examples, you know, it's Howard Schultz, you know, the passionate leader of the company who left and then had to come back because, you know, the leader that replaced him was, you know, really operating from fear and just wasn't progressing the company forward.

14:59And the same thing with Scully and Steve Jobs. And then, you know, it's really just so cool to see that it's the passionate leaders, the ones that take risks. Yes, they're going to have failures, but yes, that's where the big rewards happen as well. And so with all that being said, Melissa, what is one shift, just one single shift that we can make today, us, Fire Nation, the listeners, to lead like we mean it? I mean, it's all about how you start your day and the energy that you're showing up with. You know, if you're starting your day looking first thing at your phone, everybody else's priorities and energies is taking over you.

15:37But if you start your day in a way that energizes you, you know, whether you're exercising, stretching, meditation, so that you can show up as your most resourceful self, because when you are feeling good, then you can help other people feel good and you can tune into what they need better. So it all starts with, you know, taking good care of yourself to make sure you're showing up in a way that you can then help others show up with heart. Fire Nation, incredibly powerful words by Melissa. And Melissa, I know that you've recently written a book. So why don't you step back, give Fire Nation a little breakdown of this and give them a way to connect with you, maybe connect with your book, and then we'll say goodbye.

16:17Okay, so this is my second book. It's called Why Can't I Just Be Me? remove the masks that hide you from the world and from yourself and I wrote this book because after my first book which became an international bestseller I had some criticism that I was actually too open and I shared too much which you know on the day I should have been celebrating all the great news I ended up crying but then it spurred the second book and in the second book I really talk about you know how you can lead more with heart how to remove the masks how how to be true to who you are. You know, are you living your life based on what other people have shown you?

16:53Or are you really starting to take the time to ask yourself, like, is this what I really want? Is this aligned with my values? Is this the direction I want to go in and how to remove those masks, whether it's at work, it's at home, it's in your community so that you can start living your life more authentically. If Fire Nation wants to connect with you and learn more, where do they go? They can go to my website, ceoofyour.life. And you can also find my books on Amazon and Indigo and all the major books, online bookstores. Byron Nation, you're the average. Of the five people you spend the most time with, you've been hanging out with MD and JLD today.

17:33So keep up that heat. And for links to everything we talked about, visit eofire.com. Just type Melissa in the search bar and her show notes page will pop right up. Melissa, thank you for sharing your truth, your knowledge, your value with Fire Nation. For that, we salute you and we will catch you on the flip side. Hey, Fire Nation, a huge thank you to our sponsors and Melissa for sponsoring today's episode. And Fire Nation, are you ready to rock your very own podcast? Check out our free podcasting course where I will teach you how to create and launch your podcast for free, freepodcastcourse.com.

18:02I'll catch you there. We're on the flip side. The best converting checkout on the planet, That's Shopify. If you want to see less cars being abandoned, it's time for you to head over to Shopify. Sign up for your$1 per month trial and start selling today at shopify.com slash on fire. Are you ready for the ultimate all-in-one platform for entrepreneurs, marketers, coaches, and agencies? Build funnels, automate follow-ups, manage clients, and even white label your own software, say hello to our featured partner, High Level, and visit highlevelfire.com to start your free trial today.