In Bed with Me and Davide

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0:45Sabadei Beranchini, welcome to the podcast. I love when you give me a presentation like that. An intro. I love an intro. We're raw talking this. There's no questions. It's just a conversation. It's my favorite way to podcast with you. I also want to remark that Davide has my teddy bear in his arms right now. Certain nights feel nicer than others. For some reason, certain nights I need to borrow your teddy bear. It feels nice. I love being able to do that for you. I love him so much. I can't decide if I should bring him on the trip or not. I think you should. It does have that, you know, it's important.

1:22it's important especially after you brought him last year I know, last year he came I know, now he's probably used to it I think it's nice I think it's nice for him to change environment nice also because besides my mom when we go out of town, lots of people stay here and so you know what's odd? I think about who's going to be in our bed and him sleeping with a stranger and him feeling weird about that that's a fair point isn't that funny? I mean, they're no strangers. No, no, no. But these are family members and friends and stuff. Like there's always, our house always has multiple people in it, especially when we travel.

2:01But like. Yeah, there are more people probably when you're traveling in this house than when you're here, actually. I mean, we always have so many people in here. So we had a birthday party today for both of our children. Their birthday's a month apart. She's in June, he's in July. So we've been doing, been, it was one year, a birthday like in between. Countless two. it's our tradition but because they're so little and they you know until she like wants a themed birthday that she requests and like has her friends she's gonna be like I don't wanna have a party with so the theme is Carla's not there so the theme is unicorn and Carla's not a unicorn and it's me alone in my room with unicorns

2:48unicorns are purple and so we had a really cute little party and we leave you know for three weeks on monday so i wasn't going to do anything and then especially since last weekend saturday fell on the fourth of july and i was like i'm definitely not gonna do anything on the fourth of july weekend and then you know i was like working out with my sister my sister trains me and a group of my like closest friends and so during our workout she was like are you gonna do something i don't think so like it seems like too much and she was like we got to do something let's just do a little family dinner and i was like absolutely let's just do a family dinner it was lovely but then my friends were at the workout and they were like well we want to go so you know what usually i go balls to the fucking wall with these birthday parties and you know there's we get help and this and there's so much food and i feel like and what i realized is we go to so many birthday parties especially like at our friends house is and they just do easy shit where they like order in some food and they like set up a bar and i've done that many times before but i did it today and i did it and david was working all day he came to the party two hours late which is no problem because we leave monday for three weeks and so he's like we both have so much fucking work to do and it felt the house felt the whole process felt really easy today like it was like not stressful i like put my tablecloths We have so much beautiful stuff here that we use for entertaining.

4:17I bought a bunch of wine at Trader Joe's. I had DoorDash deliver ice from fucking Smart and Final. We had Spindriffs. We had beer. I have tequila from Casamigos. I had two mixers sitting out. I made a little bar. And we got Goop Kitchen. And ordering Goop Kitchen was the fucking slam dunk today. Because that food is delicious. I don't know how they do that pizza. I don't know what is in that. I got to talk to somebody. I gotta know how they make that pizza. I have videos of this that I have not posted online. It's weirdly one of my favorite pizza. The fact that Goop Kitchen, which is a gluten-free pizza, is one of Dabi DeBaroncini's favorite fucking pizza.

4:59It's a fact. Makes absolutely no fucking sense. Because I don't treat it as a pizza. Like, that, to me, is like flatbread. It's an alternative that I love. Yeah. And it's interesting. I think this week we've been having fantastic food. It's a week where we went. I've been trying to get in all the flavors that I can't get in Italy. A couple of places that I love. Where did we go this week? You went to Houston. I went to Lafayette. We went to Betsy last night. Went to Betsy last night. And, you know. I loved everything at Betsy besides the Caesar salad. Today was very, today was lovely. to me the biggest indicator of people having good time is when they stay people stayed late stay late and it's lovely because the door is open by the way people arrives at any time somebody leaves and come back somebody comes a little later then we watch the games which by the way i i will like it because this morning i had a like you like you just said i had a very busy day and but we start our morning with my little team and a little morning meeting and a coffee a guy i had a lot of people your coffee set up really beautiful by the way we talk about soccer you know and and what i noticed today that it was like five guys we all come from different part of the world so cute and different ages and different people but very the spectrum very wide spectrum and there is something about something like a World Cup which it doesn't happen during the Super Bowl it doesn't happen during any others but really I've never seen anything like this in my life like soccer because it's such a it's the most followed sport in the world and it brings people together and and it does have these you know even if you don't know anything about the sport you you watch the game somehow it's light it's very smooth you can watch a game for an hour and a half and it goes pretty fast it's not like a baseball game i'm not comparing sports but what i'm saying it brings people together and it's lovely to to see that so having the soccer on the the house and all the people sitting around the couches and the door is open and the kids are I love when there's a game on.

7:26Felt very nice. I love when like there's a group of people inside watching a game and then there's another group of people up by the pool. We used to entertain at least once a month. We've been very busy and on the more tired side. And I've definitely been feeling a little antisocial lately. Our social battery, for obvious reasons, has been a little lower than usual. I also want to say something that I avoid saying because it's become, this is going to sound cuntine. People are going to judge me for this. So go ahead. It's become such a thing to entertain. And it's become these things that I see that look so produced.

8:10And I just am like, the whole idea feels very exhausting to me where I've got in my head about it. And it's like, today was a really good reminder to me of like what we do best, which is just like love on our people, you know? And like this house feels really fucking good. I was about to say the space is designed to, the layout as, you know, this is not a huge house, but somehow spaces are very well designed for that. If you're in the living room, it's lovely. It feels like you're having a cup of tea with somebody that's very intimate. Your tone of the voice is a little lower. We have the couches.

8:53We have a dog sleeping on the ground. If you're in the TV room with the doors open, it's kind of like indoor, outdoor. You feel like in the middle of the rooms. It's great. And then the outside has its own moment, different moment. It feels very nice, the layout of the house. Yeah, the house just has a lot of different zones. and so the kitchen when you walk the best parties and i love doing this with you by the way like it's it's been a while it's been since our fucking since december it's so crazy because we used to like we have a couple dinner parties all the time no we have a couple no but we haven't had this many people over and it's i love when we by the way we always clean everything up before we go to bed so the house is spotless right now the dishwasher is running the washing machine's running which is my favorite way to go to bed at night just a nice way to decompress like i feel that we have that hour where, you know, we clean the pool, clean the kitchen.

9:46And we're really good as a team with that. And then we get to go to bed and we always just feel so invigorated and energized and like blissed out on like what a great day we had with our friends. And the nice thing, and I feel like every time we do this recap and we talk about a party that we loved, we always remark on how each little section in the house had its own vibe. Like there were people in the dining room and there were people. And by the way, the four days ago I said, we should, we should do this. This was a very last minute thing with not that many people, but it came together so nicely.

10:25And as you briefly just already mentioned, the truth is that, and always say, you know, like even even when we put extra effort on hosting people i always say it's not the place it's not necessarily what we're eating it's not what we're doing but it's the people that makes it special so so i think that we we but i feel very lucky every time where people are because we have a lovely deep funny interested interesting group of friends around us and and that makes my life it's a big i feel very enriched by that i feel very lucky to to i feel very fortunate for that we have a lovely group of i used to hate the term community but we really are surrounded by special people.

11:27This episode is sponsored by Cotton, the fabric of our lives. Okay. So you know how I am all about fabric. I check tags. I always have. And I honestly, the older that I get, the more I realize that what you put on your body matters just as much as what you put in it. And we're not going to try. Honestly, summer is the season I do the most wardrobe thinking. You're dressing for graduation dinners, long travel days, outdoor, everything. And in my case, summer involves a lot of heat and a lot of movement for me and my kids. And so one thing I keep coming back to every single time is cotton. I love it.

12:04Cotton breathes. It's like genuinely breathable. When it's hot and you're outside, cotton is the thing. It does not trap heat. It does not irritate your skin. It moves with you. I also think about the fact that it's a natural fiber. It comes from the earth and it does not shed microplastics into the water when you wash it. So that part matters to me a lot. And from a purely practical standpoint, cotton just lasts. My favorite pieces, the ones I've had for years are cotton. They're still my favorite pieces that I keep coming back to and back to. It keeps it shape. It gets softer with time, not worse.

12:39It's genuinely the buy nice or buy it twice situation. You invest much and you stop thinking about it. We have cotton all over our home. We have cotton sheets in all of our bedrooms. And we also are a big, like, kind of like white tea family, you know? So between myself and Davide and the kids, like we have been, especially at the beginning of spring, now that we have like a whole beautiful summer ahead of us, like I have been buying packets of white tees for all of us to like live in through summer. And it's so cute looking at these little shirts that Carlo wears and like seeing how happy he is just running around his little white t-shirts.

13:25It looks like such a little grown up, but it seems so like American and dignified to see my kids wearing like a classic white cotton t-shirt, especially with a pair of cotton jeans. So whether it's your denim, whether it's your bedding, whether it's your everyday basics, just check the tag and choose cotton. As they say, cotton really is the fabric of our lives. Learn more at thefabricofourlives.com and find them at discovercotton on Instagram. That is thefabricofourlives.com and discovercotton on Instagram. Hi, I'm Mary Alice Haney. And I'm Dr. Thais Ali Abadi. Dr. A, as she is known, is a world-renowned OBGYN.

14:07And together, we're launching a new podcast, SheMD, to empower women to become their own health advocate. We're providing women with the knowledge and tools to really own their own health. With celebrity guests and today's leading experts, we're dropping episodes every Tuesday. So listen and subscribe on YouTube or wherever you get your podcasts so you never miss an episode.

14:40My biggest challenge with Baranchini, you know, there are things that are out of my control that are being worked on in timeline wise. But the biggest thing that I've been so, that I'm so nervous about is, not nervous about, just like, because in the last few years, it has become such a part of any brand to like throw a dinner party. And. It loses the meaning. It's not that it loses the meaning. It's like. No, I get what, no, I get the point you are saying. The point of a dinner party is. it gets a little is to just be so meaningful most of the time it doesn't it feels just very like a brand and yeah so produced and like it's hard right because if you're a brand like what you want to do is gather your people so much right so you like throw a dinner party and it's like you it's like it's just hard like on a thursday night to get a bunch of people to leave their houses and like you know people put so much time and money and effort into doing activations like that.

15:46And I get it. So, but what I want, what like the feeling that you get from having like a genuinely fantastic fucking time with a group of people is not like a brand. It's like so far beyond like posting like a tablescape, you know, and like getting like a film photographer that you saw shoot another party to shoot yours. So it could look like that or like hiring this chef to have like this Instagrammable moment at like the expensive, you know, it's like, cool, I can rent Flamingo Estate and get like the most perfect chef to do this. It's like, it's just like the piece is like the vibe, you know?

16:27And it's like, how do you translate that from a brand perspective in a different way? And that's my main challenge right now. It's like, besides like the photo recap of the event, it's like, you know, how do you do, how do you have these activations that are truly really special? Well, I'm not, I mean, the stuff always feels really special, but it's like, how do you translate that digitally on a fucking platform in a way that's different? I think it is. Everything is kind of like very similar right now. you know I think is in the modality in the application of how you do things it's fair to say that whatever we do do it to at least a series of components feels very personal for a reason you know like I think that in the spectrum is the second time I use this word I don't know why but in in if you look at what we do in terms of you know yeah yeah baroncini or lpa too it it it really is connected to to our life and to who we are and to the people that surround us and and we had other people today tonight or we usually do have people over that kind of operate the same way if you look at the people that are uh creating something or there are founders or or or it's almost like you know we think alike and and kind of make the same we have the same approach to what we do so so i think is i think is important to say that whatever we do is a reflection of who we are and how we like to to approach certain things so I think whenever it feels the way it's probably because there is maybe there is not much materia about that thing and so people get a package it a little bit more but whatever it feels special and you have special people in a place and most of the time you don't need to really put much effort how are you feeling about going at just this lay on Monday it's always it's always a few feelings always you know like it yeah it's it's a it's a large range of feelings and layers and you know it's it's it's once I get to the place and usually takes me a couple of days to kind of light up a little bit and I love to be in easily something happened to me by day three or four when when i am close to the sea and i'm in the water and i kind of grounded myself and and then the food and of course my family and something happened to me once i get there and i feel it in my body and in my soul without being too dramatic but also you know you you witness it with me sometimes i out of nowhere i cry sometimes i i see a place that might be not how i remembered to be or i meet somebody that i don't meet in a long time i remember last time in the most random way we we were there for when we went with Chef Evan and we were walking at the fish market.

20:07Catania has this beautiful fish market called La Pescheria, which is, I think, with Ballarò Market and Campo dei Fiori, Ballarò Market in Palermo and Campo dei Fiori in Rome and probably the Navigli. There are a few markets in Italy that are, fair to say, a little bit more special than others. And we are working around this fish market, which is incredible, you know, especially in the early time of the day, the fish comes in and the counters are packed and the colors are incredible and the feeling the smell it's beautiful it's one of my favorite things to do i met this friend of mine we grew up together he's he's uh he's a fisherman and we play soccer together we really grew up together and he was probably 15 years i didn't see him and i'm walking around and he's cleaning this beautiful swordfish in a table and we we just hug it it was crazy it's a bit for a guy you call me crying so cathania really has uh to me the memory of uh of a previous life of a previous life and and he carries a weight an emotional weight that there is always uh to me facing it and dealing it with especially during in the first few days is always quite a process.

21:23But I'm very excited. I'm very happy to go home and very happy to have our kids being able to experience that. I'm very happy you being able to experience that with me. And I think that you really, I think, always allowed you to understand a lot about me as a person before being your husband and the father of your child. So it's a beautiful, beautiful process to me. I mean, it's been 10 years that we've been going and... Yeah, it's been already, it's been almost 10 years. It's been 10 years. First time we went in 2017 together, yeah. And so it's interesting every year we go, I mean, multiple times a year, but whenever we go, it's such a reflection of like where we are in our lives, right?

22:10And then I've seen, you know, we've gone through so much together as a couple. Like my father passed away and then your mother passed away. And I've experienced Sicily, oh, so much of it, like not on a vacation, obviously. Like, right? Like people think about going to Italy and all of this, like as a vacation. And for us, for me, it's so much of it. It has been, yeah, I'm enjoying this beautiful place, but like some of the most heavy things have happened. And also, you know, I think there's a real... It's a very intense place. Yeah, so I think that I was going to say, there's this real like intricacy about the intensities of Sicily and how it really, and Italy in general, like there are places where things feel very much how they felt in the 1920s.

23:02And so I remember one time we were driving through like a tiny town up in Etna and I was like, oh, I want to go into that store. It looks like so cute. Like I want to go into that store. and I was walking in and I did not feel welcome. And I was like, oh, I want to try that thing. And you grabbed me and you were like, let me lead this. And it was one of those very interesting moments where we've talked about this a lot in our relationship where I could have been like, no, like I want to da-da-da. And it's not you being trying to like amask, like it's not you trying to like undermine me. you're literally like where we are women don't act like this like they don't understand this type of energy that you're bringing into this space i think it's a very delicate topic and i think i think it's i don't even we don't even need to dissect the topic it like is what it is and so i think it yeah no no i think it requires but i quickly yeah and i and i think that comes under culture right like i obviously and most people are you just go somewhere and you like think it's like a movie and so you're i felt it and you put your arm around me and you led because that is what was acceptable in this particular space in this certain way and i remember getting in the car and being like fuck like i was acting like really naive like think you know it was the very first time wasn't it yeah it was very like i was like oh shit like i am in a different place and need to be respectful of how people move in this space.

24:36And so that's been like a very, you know, you are the first person to tell me to live my life and speak out loud and do, you know, you're my biggest supporter. Of course, of course. And so it was really interesting for you to kind of put your arm around me and being like, you can't be like full peepee right now. It's the equivalent of, I remember one time, one of the first time we were traveling across America together, we were in this little town and you know i love america i get so excited and i get like a kid sometimes we were walking into this diner i don't remember where we were but but i remember you telling me like yo you know what be aware because people might don't necessarily translate you right away in terms of your persona and you know your accent this and that and i remember you kind of you kind of try to introduce me to an environment that for me would be so far from who I am and how I grew up.

25:36Like that time we went to the Supreme store. Yeah, but I remember this time was a diner. It was somewhere remote. We were in the middle of nowhere. And you told me that and I walk in and you know the door, one of those places, you walk in and I look at you and you walk in. I'm like, I see what you're saying. so I guess it's you know it's every place especially places that have such a history like Sicily or certain parts of America certain parts of Europe somehow carries you know the code is a little bit more complex sometimes if you're not used to to the craziest to translate to decodify was spending all that time in the hospital with your mom.

26:25Yeah, of course. You also, you went from zero to death. But it's a very interesting thing experiencing a country from the perspective of a hospital from many levels, right? Like logistically, how healthcare is handled in other countries is always fascinating. And then culturally, it was like, you don't tell people in Italy when they're dying. you don't tell people when they're really sick you don't want to and that was crazy it's also one of the privatized paramedics where you have where you have the the popular aspects where you have the religious aspects where you have to deal with you know delicate delicate moments for people.

27:16Yeah, if you compare an hospital in Provincia di Catania with an hospital in any part of any major American city. I feel like I want to write about this. No, we had people praying. We had chapels in the hospital where people praying. There's smoking sections. Yeah, there is a smoking. Cafes. There's espresso bars in hospitals. It's quite different than... But it's adorable. It's still a very community-based experience. It's like, oh, let's go downstairs and get a coffee. Let's go outside and smoke a cigarette. Like people are holding their IV bags outside smoking cigarettes with the nurses. You know what's interesting?

27:59And I think that most of what we're talking about culturally and I think it has to do with spirituality. I've been experiencing cities in America with the level of spirituality that it was maybe not that but like i remember first time i went to new orleans and i think i said this in the past oh cool i had a sense of familiarity first time i went to certain area of new york the first time i met you know first time i went to i don't know the bronx or queens or without using any stereotype but there are certain or some part of philly or some part of Chicago that there are parts of it's almost if certain communities immigrants carry this pity to what the spiritual approach to whatever they do and that translate on in hospitals on in places where people hang out or on a bus you know I remember taking subways like it's interesting how certain places carries that for sure sicily is is is one of those places yeah and it takes i think sensibility to to walk into one of those places or or visiting it and you know not being a tourist but being somebody that somehow you you know your life somehow is linked to the place through me and now through our kids which which which will have this this second home in life so I think is yeah I think you do it pretty gracefully I'm always a I'm very you know like well thank you I mean it was you have an understanding of the landscape and the people and the spirituality you also feel it you know so that we even go to a cafe that they feel different for some reason of some others you will walk into a cafe early in the morning if his family own is different and there is an old nonna somewhere things in italy what i love about and i miss about italy unless you're not dumb you walk to a place you understand how that place kind of operate there are few little indicators of okay this is how this place is and the way people their tone of voice or what the topic are if the music is is playing or it's not there is a radio there is talking about there is papers on the car it's very if you look in your focus if you are if you have sensitive enough there is a moral map that you can follow in certain places if you know i think that's something beautiful about them i saw that in greece i saw that in france certain part of spain there is definitely there is a map that you can a lot of signs that you can follow too

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34:42the cast of characters that we were that were around us when your mom was in the hospital was wild like the woman who was she was sharing the room with who was yelling for her son but the daughter was there and that was like she was literally cap yelling for her son who was not there and then we'd all laugh because it was just like then that beautiful fisherman who was yeah Yeah, of course, because we were like, this is ridiculous. Which, by the way, is my joke with my mom that like on her deathbed, she's going, Spencer, Spencer, where's Spencer? Spencer. Because fucking mommies love their sons so much.

35:16And then that beautiful fisherman who was across the hallway who didn't know that he was dying. And then. That was a pretty sad story. What? That was, because he was very young. He was beautiful. That was a pretty sad story. That was awful. And then that cute, like. Yeah, he looked like a movie character for real. The chubby, beautiful, but like chubby nurse, the guy who was the nurse. He was so beautiful. But he was like... Very cute guy. He was like a beautiful face. And he was chunky. And then he had this like, really? And I say that... He looked like a big doll. He looked like my brother, Jeff.

35:53Like he had the same size, fat, short fingers. Yeah, it's true. He was like a stout man. He was like, like my brothers. And then he made that rose for your mom out of that piece of paper. So he was such like a big man. I have a video of it, but he made this like little rose out of the paper. And then this other crazy thing that happens was like so fascinating to me is there's like competing paramedic companies in Sicily and they fucking put their business cards with like the Madonnas on the back. And so they walk up and down the hallways of the hospitals and they take down their competitor cards and throw them in the trash.

36:30And then they put their fucking cards out. but all these cards have the Madonna on the back. And I was like, what the fuck is this paramedics hustle in the name of the Virgin? It was so, that was fucking funny. Those are the fine lines. I could write a short film about the fucking whole experience. Those are the fine lines Italians like to dance above. Oh my God. Blasphemy, and I guess it goes with spirituality. Today I read something. I read a quote that kind of stick with me that says, you understand the intelligence level of somebody based on how they can use sarcasm. And I think that there is a level of intelligence, most of the time, my, of course, gets into dishonest nuances, but there is a very particular way, particular intelligence about, especially in the south of Italy, about the way people navigate certain things.

37:34You can see it from Naples down pretty much. It's pretty colorful, you know, people get very creative. I'm excited for this trip. I would say it's probably the first time in a long time that usually every time I get to this time of the year, you know it's a delicate time and I felt the way a couple of days ago I'm like you know I always travel with it happens sometimes they live down when some some things are happening business-wise a lot of things are happening for us we are in you know in a time in both sides a guy I end up baroncini we are in a moment of building and and you know and shaping and I mean selfishly it's good for me for Barantini because I get to get all of our vendors.