Amelia Sordell | “Feel the Fear. Post Anyway.” | Extraordinary Life Stories

0:00If anyone's ever lost a business, you can kind of relate to this when I say it's like a death. Like you tie your entire identity to this thing. You know, I was a 21-year-old CEO, managing director. Like that was my entire identity. Tell me who is Amelia Sodell. Amelia Sodell is a personal branding strategist and founder. I think that's probably how I describe myself. And mum too. Through that, it's a tough guy. That built your resilience though, right? Early. I'm such a big believer that failure isn't the opposite of success. It's part of it, you know. Not trying things because you're worried you're going to look stupid or you're worried you're going to fail is the opposite of actually trying to win at something.

0:36Doctors pioneering medicine don't find the kids in it without multiple failures. Yeah. But they're not talked about. All you need to do to be successful at something is, well, probably three things. One, be delusional enough to think that you can achieve it, right? But two, take one step at a time. Do one tiny thing that's going to move the needle. And the third thing is just be wildly consistent. I'm sitting here because I've been doing this and saying the same thing for seven years. like literally the same thing for seven years. It's a proof it works right? Yeah it's not sexy but it works. Okay I get it I've got to do this I've got to feel the fear and do it anyway but what's the first step to that?

1:22Welcome. You can tell I'll be looking forward to this. Yeah well me too it's been a long time coming. Yeah. Tell me who is Amelia Soedel? It's such a big question to start this session with. Amelia Soedel is a personal branding strategist and founder. I think it's probably how I describe myself and mum too, but all of those things. Where did this all start then, personal branding? It's an interesting thing. I would love to say that I look back and I knew that personal branding was going to be this big thing, like human to human marketing was going to be the next big thing and how to build brands and how to build businesses.

1:54But actually the reality is that I had a business when I was 21. And I learned very, very quickly that people, my customers were buying my products because I was showing up on Instagram. I was the one that was posting things on Facebook. I was the one wearing the clothes that I was selling. And when that business failed spectacularly in year two, what was the business? It was a clothing brand. And it was really good. Like for 21 years old, I had like Colleen Rudy wearing our stuff. I had Danielle Lloyd wearing our stuff. back then they were like the people this was pre-influencers pre you know like you know you pay someone a couple of grand and they take pictures in your clothes this was like getting papped in the daily mail and your brand being tagged so I was like made it 21 I was like absolutely doing well here um and that hubris then led to the business kind of closing in year two and during the kind of grieving process which if anyone's ever lost a business you can kind of relate to this when I say it's like a death like you tie your entire identity to this thing you I was 21 year old CEO, managing director, like that was my entire identity.

2:56And so I spent some time grieving. And after my mum kind of gave me a bit of a pep talk of like, you can't live at home forever. I remember going online and I Googled, what is the one thing you can do with the least amount of experience that's going to pay you the most amount of money? And recruitment is what came up. So I went and did that and applied a lot of the knowledge that I'd learned through that failed business to my approach to recruitment, which was people aren't working with me as a recruiter because the company I work for is a big brand. people are working with me as a recruiter because I'm really good at my job and because they know who I am.

3:27So instead of following the normal route, which was make a thousand calls a day and hope for the best, I started posting content and started getting CEOs of really large businesses coming to me and very, very quickly went from rookie recruiter to team lead in about 12 months and billing more than my peers who were three, four, five, sixes, 10 years in than I was just by posting content. And that was my kind of introduction to personal branding. I love that. So there was probably a real sense of associated identity with the business that failed. And I get that. That's something that I talk to other people in the chair, if you like.

4:05And coming through that's tough, right? That built your resilience though, right? Early. I'm such a big believer that failure isn't the opposite of success. It's part of it, you know, not trying things because you're worried you're going to look stupid or you're worried you're going to fail is the opposite of actually trying to win at something all the people that you see that are successful whether it's like you know idolize Elon Musk or Richard Branson or sports people or you know whoever it might be none of these people have anything different than you they just had the desire and I guess being okay with being embarrassed with potentially failing and look like when you try something you either get a good outcome or a good story right and I've now got a really good story that I can tell people like I had this business that failed so So, yeah, it's something that's taken a while to learn.

4:51Yes. But I think failure is absolutely the pathway to success. Really important to share that. And that whole test and learn. You know, scientists don't suddenly find the cure to something or doctors pioneering medicine don't find the cure to something without multiple failures. Yeah. But they're not talked about. It's all part of. Yeah. So using that kind of sex analogy in social media. There's I've got two daughters growing up. I want to bring it in early because you're a role model to so many women and so many business people, men and women, me included. Your content is inspiring and you put yourself out there in a vulnerable way on social media.

5:29And I want to almost capture that whole kind of like how difficult was that for you to do at the beginning? And back to that person, it's like, oh, which is me at times still and many other people. Do you know what's really funny? I have friends who are like some of the most well-known entrepreneurs in this country. like I'm talking 15 million followers right everyone knows who these people are and they still are like oh when something goes out there and I have this conversation often you know I'll be looking through you know comments that they've had being like this person didn't like my content I'm like why do you care like you're you've built this entire media empire off the back of your personal brand why do you care what one person from Colchester thinks like it doesn't matter but I only have that confidence because I had the courage to just do it one of the questions I get asked the most to kind of tee back off of what you just said is how did you get so confident?

6:18Like, where did you get the confidence to start? You know, you share everything, you know, where does that come from? And to be honest, it comes from just doing it. Like you don't get confident in anything, whether it's posting content, building a business, being a parent, being a good partner, being a good husband, a good wife. You don't get the confidence to do those things by reading a book on how to get confident or, you know, following some six step program you get confident in those things by repeatedly going at something and sucking at it until you get good at it um and so my confidence to kind of just come here and be like i had a failed business like i've had a failed marriage like here's all my mess ups is because i've been through it i've shared those and i didn't die when i did so i'm like okay cool we we can talk about this and nothing terrible is going to happen and that in itself just creates a confidence in yourself in what you're doing in your beliefs etc and so anyone who's like feeling not confident in something i think don't avoid doing the thing you're not good at yet just go all in on it even when you're sucking because the embarrassment of not being good at something yet is the entry fee to being successful at it love that there's so much already in this conversation people buying people understanding that you vibe off people and then the whole kind of what i love is that you pioneered something that worked for you, that gave you an empowerment, a fulfillment to also then be successful in business.

7:37But now you pass that on to so many other people, literally in this conversation, about people thinking, oh, okay, this is good information, but you've got to do it yourself. So on that, like someone watching, listening to you now, I think, okay, I get it. I've got to do this. I've got to feel the fear and do it anyway. But what's the first step to that? Because actually sometimes that's the bit you've read the book, you've listened to Amelia, but it's like, I'm going to do this. And then it's the freeze. Can you talk through those first steps that might get you easing into it? Or is it just, just do it.

8:05Just go. Do you know what? It's so easy to listen to someone being like, just go for it. Because that takes all of the nuanced emotions out of it, right? It makes it very linear. It's like, if you want to get from A to B, you just have to go to B, right? But actually we're all human. And there is a human experience that we all go through, whether it's being a first time parent or going and asking that person on a date or hitting posts on that first bit of content or like going and asking a bank for a loan to start a business and being told like these are all new experiences and we all have emotion attached to them I think anyone that says that business is not personal has never built a good business like of course business is personal of course the content you share is personal of course you're going to feel embarrassment scared fear all of these things when you do something new because you're a human being and if you didn't feel those things I'd argue probably need to go see a therapist.

8:54But in terms of the first step, like just do one thing that's going to move you towards the goal, right? So when I first started posting content as a reference point, I didn't start posting content with the view that I'm going to have 400 ,000 followers and millions and millions of views every month and I need to be posting seven times a week. Or when I first started my business, I didn't have these grand plans of I'm going to make a multi-million pound business and I'm going to exit and all these things. I just wanted to do something that I loved and get paid, you know, with my content. I just wanted to share something that I thought was interesting.

9:25And that was like step one. And I think a lot of people, particularly in business, I'm sure there's lots of people listening to this who are operating businesses or, you know, working at a high level within one. We all get told you need to have a five year plan, a three year plan. Like what is your what is your goal for the next 12 months? Actually, I think that's often counterproductive because it gives you the big picture thinking, which is really important, whether you're building a personal brand or building a business or building a relationship. But it doesn't give you the way to get there.

9:51There is no map that you've got to go from A to Z. You're just expected to see the big thing and be like, right, let's aim in that direction. All you need to do to be successful at something is, well, probably three things. One, be delusional enough to think that you can achieve it, right? But two, take one step at a time. Do one tiny thing that's going to move the needle. If it's posting content, you're trying to build a personal brand, okay, today, maybe optimize your LinkedIn profile today maybe set up an Instagram account today maybe write some thoughts down that's one step towards where you're trying to get and the third thing is just be wildly consistent I'm sitting here because I've been doing this and saying the same thing for seven years like literally the same thing for seven years it works right yeah it's not sexy but it works and you know I've built a multi-million pound business off the back of it I've you know changed my life and I say that when people say they've changed their life I think sometimes you kind of go oh yeah fine but like I've literally changed my life I went from living paycheck to paycheck you know saving up all year to go on a two-week holiday and then doing it all again the following year to doing what I want when I want with who I want getting invited to incredible things like this meeting incredible people like you just because I had the audacity to start and have had the discipline to be consistent enough to keep doing it love that love that love that is working so well that's inspiration for anyone watching or listening.

11:14The piece about personal brand, so it's almost like zeitgeist timing you said, but it's always been there. Richard Branson as an individual has been a personal brand in my life, if you like, forever, but never really thought of it. I mean, Jesus has got a personal brand. We all read his book. I'm told you that's an interesting viewpoint, but you're right, we all do, right? So what is your definition of personal brand? I think personal branding gets a pretty bad rap because when people hear the word personal branding they assume one of two things one it's a really ego driven activity and you know people who are building their personal brand only want attention right and two people think that it's really personal so you need to share your innermost thoughts and feelings and diary entries with the world in order to create something meaningful and actually personal branding to me is the content part and the social media part is such a small element of building a personal brand you know a personal brand is how you greet people when you first meet them do you shake their hands do you look them in the eye it's do you have a floppy little wet handshake or have you really practiced like grab someone's hand and like have some force in there you know when you see the barista who made your coffee this morning did you say thank you um do you remember people's names you know all of these things make up your personal brand how you communicate on email and how you dress you know even even when i show up in certain pieces of my content i will intentionally dress down because there is a certain angle i'm trying to reach with the people that I'm trying to speak to.

12:35All of these things form your personal brand. So if you want to kind of, I guess, encompass it in a simple statement, your personal brand is just your reputation at scale. It's the thing that people are talking about in association to you when you're not in the room. And that is so far beyond just posting content on a social media platform. That's brilliant. I love that. It goes back to upbringing. It goes back to role models, goes back to how you're interacting with people because that's aspirational for people as well. So there's an element of what you can guide and show leading by example and then the content you put out.

13:06But also we can all watch people see how they're interacting. I like the way that that was was done or how that was said. And then I can bring that into my my way of being. My point being you can evolve it and kind of bring that consistency where that's something I'm going to be accountable for or I'm going to show up for. And what you've just said there is such an overlooked part of this. Right. I think when people say like me, like you need to build your personal brand, like take control of your destiny whatever people go my god like i need to create original stuff and i have no original ideas where i first started i just went and looked at other people that i found really interesting like you know mentioned richard branson he's the goat of this like he's amazing gary v i've been following him for years he's been doing this for 20 plus years you know politicians they all have entire teams around them to build strong personal brands to you know appeal to a particular electorate right so go and look at people that you find inspiring interesting the the way they communicate and try and kind of learn from them.

14:02Obviously, you're never going to be someone else and you should never try and be anyone else. If you see something you like, you can take that and think that. Why wouldn't you? And if you see something you like, it's because you've worked out from an empathetic point of view, it should work with me. I like that. Of course. Of course. And I think, like I always say, to create, you need to consume. So if you want to create anything, whether it be a new business, whether it be a piece of content, whether it be, you know, I don't know, like a drawing, you need to be inspired by something. No one has ever just come up with an idea by sitting in a, you know, an office building with like a computer.

14:31Like you get these ideas sitting under a tree, you know, Newton or going for a walk or listening to a podcast, reading a book. Like you have to get inspiration from somewhere. And if there's people that you've come across, you've got strong personal brands. Maybe they're business owners who have built something really spectacular and like, wow, like I would love to do that. Why wouldn't you go and get inspired from what they're doing and what they're saying? And then whatever it is that sparked in you from reading or engaging with that type of content, then that can be the kind of beginning part of what you want to share.

14:58I love that because actually what you're encouraging there is curiosity, which I think aligns us particularly. You know, I am so full of questions for you, for life, for anything, because in any one way I'm asking something to potentially be a better version of myself. And I think if you lose that, if you haven't got that, you're ultimately not growing. I think it's probably quite a British thing. what you what you just said that really piqued my interest about the whole the whole kind of selfish element personal brand ah you know that's not important she thinks she is yes and there's two things there there's the there's the personal individual so it's like oh i don't want to talk about me and who cares and then there's the fact that i'm trying to grow a business which of course you sit right in the middle of so if i had a business now that i'm trying to to grow get sales for amplify um how important is my personal brand to the business because i might be someone looking at this going, well, this isn't for me.

15:49I don't need to do that. But actually you could reframe that. Well, it's a huge part of the business that you could be missing. I think there's two sides to this. One is if you're the founder of a business, who best to promote it? Like if you're unwilling to promote your own business, then why are you running one? You can't employ people. You can't employ a marketing team and expect them, particularly at the beginning stages of the business, to understand your customer and understand why you started doing this better than you can. Like, it's just impossible. The second part of this is you don't have to build a personal brand.

16:22Like there are plenty of business models that I know that don't need one. So for example, like a regional cleaning service, like I would, if someone came to me and said, I'm trying to build a franchise, a regional house cleaning service, like, should I build a personal brand? I'd be like, why don't you just go and knock on doors? You have a 1500 person, you know, radius of people. If you can get 500 of those people to be your customer, you've got a cracking business. You what I would argue is going and knocking on doors and greeting people and shaking their hand and looking into the whites of their eyes is personal branding.

16:51So however which way you frame this, if you're the founder of a business, you have to be the face of it. If we look at all successful businesses, whether it's Dell, Apple, Microsoft, Spanx, Tala, Nike, Gymshark more recently, all of these businesses have a face and the face is the founder because the founder is the person who solved the problem which is why the business exists so i think if you're just getting started you think it all particularly if you're a brit i'm like i'm half british so i can kind of dog the brits out a little bit like you need perspective though that's why i said he's actually with the aussie bit as well right i've got what i would call the unearned confidence in australian like love that like aussies are just generally pretty confident like we're pretty you know i would say we're kind of like the the cousins of the brits and the americans we're kind of straddle sort of the sense of humor of the Brits, but like have the unearned confidence of Americans, right?

17:45Like they love that. So we, you know, I can come at it from both angles, but I think if you're, if you're in the UK or even anywhere and you're thinking, gosh, like who am I to be doing this? Like, of course you should be doing this because who else, if not you, who else? Cause no one is going to talk about your business in the way that you can talk about your business. And I really, really feel that human to human marketing is the way that we are going, you know, why do you think brands spend$250 billion a year on social media? It's to humanize their brands. 97 % of that, by the way, produces zero ROI.

18:18Zero. So, you know, and there's another statistic as well that came out at the end of last year that said that 80 % of people would rather buy from a founder who they followed online. So more and more, we're seeing brands, consumers, people wanting to buy from people. It's always been that way. But now we can do it at scale because we have access to social media and we can reach millions of people instead of just one so this brings authenticity into the conversation you exude it like you are just raw you and you and you're doing that now fully present with me but also i saw some of your content where you're at the wheel of your car obviously parked up with my eye patches yeah yeah but it's just this is my point it's vulnerability and that vulnerability is so strong you use your word confident as well but it's it's you can feel it's built confidence so I want to relate that to whether it's me who still struggles with that or anyone watching, listening, who gets the vulnerability piece is actually possibly the content that goes furthest.

19:14People are craving authenticity, particularly with AI now. You know, I look on my Instagram and now I'm sort of doubting whether this is even real or not. So how important is that authenticity piece and to be vulnerable that gives that strength? There's two sides to this. I think to build a really strong personal brand, particularly as a founder, you don't necessarily need to be private. Like you don't, I don't ever share photos of my kids. And if I do, I block their face out, not because, you know, I think it's bad not to do or to do. It's just that I didn't ask them whether they wanted to be on social media.

19:42This is my career choice, not theirs. When they're old enough to make that decision, they're more than welcome to do so. I don't necessarily talk, show you my car or like where I live or whatever, because I'm not, I'm not trying to be an influencer, although everyone has influence. I think if you're just getting started with this process, You need to look at your personal brand as, you know, for example, when we first met, we bonded over the fact that you've got two girls and I've got two kids. And, you know, we had a moment before we started recording when I was like, how's that going? Teenage girls is pretty wild.

20:09And you knew what you were asking, right? Yeah, of course, because we have a shared lived experience. And the reason why sharing vulnerability and, you know, to your point, you referred to the video I shared, but literally eye patches under my eye. I've just come back from, you know, dropping my kids from school and I've got no scrap of makeup on my face. and that had a quarter of a million views. And all of my videos that I share that follow a similar pattern, you know, no makeup, hair up, whatever, always do really well. And I think that's because people watch those videos and they listen, you know, to you talking about your daughters and they go, me too.

20:42And that's what you're trying to get. Relatability. Yeah, affinity. You're trying to get people to go, me too. And the more you can kind of capture that in people's hearts, the more they trust you, the more they like you, and therefore the more they want to buy from you. Brands spend billions trying to get trust from their customers. Why do you think TripAdvisor exists? Why do you think Trustpilot exists? We have rating systems because we don't trust brands, but we do trust our peers that we've never met before in our life. So why wouldn't you leverage that to promote your business? That makes so sense.

21:14You articulated that beautifully. Humanising you, just thinking about that post you did, the patches under your eyes and so on. Great patches, by the way. You're super busy. so thank you for making time for this right but that that element of what becomes i guess the word success and we'll come to that in a minute um there's a lot talked about in books podcasts conversations with successful people where it's you've got to get up crazy early you've got to get up and do a workout run a marathon read a book before nine o 'clock yeah where do you sit with that look i think it's all a personal choice i've got friends who get up at 10 a.m roll out of bed.

21:50They've got no responsibilities. They probably drink too much, drink too much coffee, you know, exercise, of course. But, you know, they are the opposite of what we're told to be if you want to be successful. Yeah, they're making millions. If there was one way to do it, then we would all be billionaires. Right. Like if we all if we all everyone that got up at 5am was was successful, we wouldn't need to be listening to this. Right. I think you've got to work out what works best for you. But what works best for me is I'm an early up early to bed. Anytime I go to sleep late i am exhausted and it just ruins me for the next day but what i will say is you know we've discussed about we both have adhd i was diagnosed as an adult not that i lead too much with that because i feel like adhd to me is not really a thing that i have it's just who i am and i think for me anyway and i'm not saying to anyone um to do this also but for me labeling it as that is almost like i've got something wrong with me and i think i've got anything wrong with me i think i'm great so i don't i don't i don't need not an excuse no it's not a label to be put to attach to anything correct and you've learned to cope with it i also think when you have certainly for me when you get told that you have something you then go down a rabbit hole of research like all the things that make you less normal with that thing and then you're like oh so i can't be organized i can't be this i can't be that and that almost manifests itself like thoughts are very powerful things um whereas i'm the opposite i'm like i can hyper focus on something i can do probably three hours work and that is the same amount of work that someone else would do in a week you know i don't have a normal working schedule i start work at 10 a.m because i want to before work be able to get all my kind of life min done my workout get the kids to school like all of this kind of stuff um and that's what works for me but it doesn't necessarily mean i'm going to go online and be like if you want to be successful you need to wake up at five o 'clock in the morning and spend five to seven answering emails because that's when no one else is awake Like, sure, it works for me, but you might think that's living hell.

23:46No, I get it. And I know you really, consistency is a word you've used already. Yeah. Every morning? Yeah, pretty much, even on the weekends. And it works with my partner, also gets up really early and also goes to bed really early. I'm the same. Yeah. And so I feel like it would be trickier if one of us was like a late bird and, you know, the other one wasn't, but we're both in sync. So it works really well. It's a bit of a personal question, but it's something I, so we just, we're not that far from Christmas, so we're filming first week of Feb, right? So that breaks... No day's the same for either of us, right?

24:17I get that. So... And we both thrive off being busy and lots of different things and things to look forward to. A lot more busy than bored. Yes. And we both interact with people all the time. So I think there's a... Where do you fit where you can't do that morning routine and you can't set yourself up? For example, you weren't well over Christmas. Yeah. How did you deal with that? so we were just saying earlier when we jumped in here that I've I prided myself on never really taking sick days I think my entire life I'd taken like three sick days totally so I was like I'm like I never get sick have the immune system of a stray dog I was so unwell over Christmas I was took a I had to take a full two weeks off pretty much and that wasn't like I'm going on vacation So let me just tee everything up.

25:01That was you are now forced to be in bed. You are like so unwell that you can't even have the lights on and life come out, comes at you very fast in those kinds of situations. I thrive on routine. And as you said, like consistency is really important to me, but I'm also aware that life doesn't operate like that way. You know, that, that old adage, you know, you make plans and God laughs at them. Right. So you just got to roll with it. And also when you've got young kids and Christmas and in-laws and parents and whatever, like life just happens. I think if you're too rigid in your routine and, you know, being ill is going to throw you off your game, like you've got to build some resilience, dude.

25:40Like, you know, that's life. You've got to roll with it. And it's something that I'm working with my daughter on a lot at the minute. She's eight going on 18, the sass of a teenage girl in a tiny little body. But she's really struggling at the minute because she's really, really high achiever. Like she's got what I call high achiever syndrome. She either burns out or she gets bored. Like she's always striving to be top of her class. Not because there's any pressure at home. We're just like chill out. But she really loves praise and she loves, you know, achieving something. And she was crying in the bathroom this morning because, you know, she she got a bad mark on one of her tests.

26:14And like that's unusual for her and she doesn't know how to deal with that. And I said, you know what? Like you just have an off day sometimes. Like it's fine. And she's like, yeah, but you know, and I'm like, no, but nothing. like you know things happen that's life you've got to learn that sometimes things don't go your way no matter what you prepare for and just go again next time like just make sure the next day is better than the last one and that's it yeah make mega life lessons to be learning at eight from someone like yourself who's not just her mum I wish I knew that when I was eight it isn't but isn't it amazing you know that now and have sort of stress tested that with so many clients and people that have also then been able to raise their game to be able to pass that on as a as a parent And on that, just where the education system lacks in so many life skills.

26:56How long have you got? Exactly. I'm almost going to... We can agree on that and almost park it, right? So on that, we're home tutoring our two teenage daughters. Yeah. And so the academic side of things, they can learn that through the teachers. But so much of what you kind of help clients with, helping me in this conversation and pass on to your daughter, are things that aren't taught in school. at what point would kind of the the personal brand building your confidence the consistency element almost be like a part of the curriculum if you like and brought it in early because they these are all things that make us grow as people a hundred percent i actually think these things should be taught from like eight you know seven eight years old you know i read something recently that said that you form your relationship with money from when you're seven or eight years old and why are we teaching kids, like tiny kids about cash?

27:50Like you need to be learning these things. Otherwise you get to your 21 years old and you don't understand anything. I think we don't give kids enough credit for how smart they are and how switched on they are and how much they can understand about things. I think we think because they're children, we need to shield them from the real world because God forbid they should understand what that is before we're ready really for them to understand that. But actually these are things they should be learning. They should know that, you know, everything you do and say and wear and your behavior corresponds to how people perceive you.

28:16And therefore you should probably be a nice person that says please and thank you. Or those people might not want to hang out with you and not want to sit next to you and all of these things. These are all basic skills that I think most parents would of course teach their children to say please and thank you, but we don't really teach them why. Like why should you want pocket money? Why should you be saving that and maybe not spending it all on the 18 legami pens that you're currently obsessed with? Your girls are probably a bit over the age of the legami pen era, but my kids are currently full in the obsession that is currently plaguing everyone in primary school which are these pens so that is currently the currency i haven't gave that one but i have my own there was something before it yeah of course there's always a version of this thing and we're currently in that so we're kind of using that i guess as leverage to teach the kids about things but you know mortgages tax returns why it's better for you to have a self-investment you know obviously i'm not financial advisor but have a self-invested pension you know all of these things you should know yeah you know interest why you should try and pay off your mortgage there's lots of advice around there about you know get really long mortgages get interest free but you do realize that the lump sum of that interest is paid in the first five years so if you keep remortgaging you're never going to pay it off like these are all things that kids need to know about but we don't teach them because we're like oh they can learn about that when they're an adult it's too late by then it's too late does feel like i hope that that's changing in some way because kids are growing up so much quicker and the advancements of tech and social media is amplifying that for me.