Denise Lewis: Olympic Gold, Mental Resilience & Life After the Finish Line | Extraordinary Life Stories

0:005 a.m.

0:01Denise Lewis:I'm up with a crisp Celsius energy drink. Running 12 miles today. Grab a green juice, quick change, and head to work. Meetings, workshops. One more Celsius, no slowing down. Working late, but obviously still meeting the girls for a little dancing. Celsius. Live. Fit. Go. Grab a cold, refreshing Celsius at your local retailer or locate now at Celsius.com.

0:24John Reynolds:kayak gets my flight hotel and rental car right so i can tune out travel advice that's just

0:30Denise Lewis:plain wrong bro sky coin way better than points never fly during a scorpio full moon just tell

0:38John Reynolds:the manager you'll sue instant room upgrade stop taking bad travel advice start comparing hundreds of sites with kayak and get your trip right kayak got that right How can I take the losses that will inevitably come on the chin and so I don't crack? How do I stay believing that the Olympic gold medal is a reality and I can make that happen?

1:04Denise Lewis:Who is Denise Lewis?

1:06John Reynolds:Well, I'm an Olympic champion, a mother, someone who really believes in giving back and paying the way forward. You have talent or you have an ability or you want to achieve something in your life. You cannot do that on your own.

1:20Denise Lewis:There's a visualisation element to this as well. No wonder what experience you've had of that with visualisation or manifestation.

1:25John Reynolds:I'd just set a new British and Commonwealth record. I think it was the end of June. The games of the heptathlon wasn't due to start until mid-September. I got injured and that's when the power of the mind really came to the fore.

1:41Denise Lewis:Did you have a moment where there was an element of like, what do I do now? Did you flow?

1:45John Reynolds:No, I didn't flow. I'd even flow it was my god what do I do now

2:03Denise Lewis:Denise Lewis I've been looking forward to this conversation who can't tell thank you for joining me thanks for having me tell me who is Denise Lewis who is she well I'm an Olympic champion

2:15John Reynolds:I am a mother I am someone who really believes in giving back and paying the way forward I had a lot of people give to me in my journey to becoming an Olympic gold medalist and I think it's my duty to help the next generation move forward

2:36Denise Lewis:Can you tell me more about the people that have helped you? Because I very much want to come to the fact that you've done so much to help other people but who really helped you on that journey?

2:45John Reynolds:Okay, there have been coaches. There are people that you don't even, wouldn't even assume are inspiration, but just because of their engagement or the small things that they say, they've played a part and impacted me just to think differently and to be differently. But I guess one of the greatest sources of inspiration for me It has been my mom. I'm the only child from a single parent family. And my mom literally gave me everything she could possibly give.

3:25Denise Lewis:I love that. I love that you got that in early in this conversation. You can feel the power behind it. I think a lot of people, we clearly know you more than me, people that have achieved a huge amount in sport. And to do that, you have to be really selfish. You have to be really focused, dedicated. but to then flip that to the fact that uh you you recognize that to be able to achieve what you did you had the help you had the support to then want to give back and really really feel that yeah it's

3:53John Reynolds:it's everything it's it's that cycle it's that loop that continuum that you have talent or you have an ability or you have a vision or you want to achieve something in your life you cannot do that on your own there will be someone that you have to either be has has to be your sounding board as someone who you just have to rely on yeah um but yeah ultimately to be the best and i think to in talking high performance and maybe you know in the workplace as well in business if you haven't got a drive and you're not prepared to see your vision through um if you in my instance you don't eat sleep and breathe it it won't go anywhere because there will be those hands that are guiding you when offering support giving up their time but ultimately when you're standing on that start line you have to drive it home that's down to you that is down

4:58Denise Lewis:to the individual but just when you referenced your mum there and how important she was there will be times building up to the the moment you're on the start line and you physically you've always and it will come to that but physically you're formidable and then the mindset element uh that goes with that to back yourself but before the start line there's a voice only one time that could come come into your head saying i can't do this or she's faster than me or i'm not going to able to make it did you internalize that any time or did you reach out for help or was there an intuition with your mother and maybe a coach that recognized that and worked on your resilience

5:34John Reynolds:I would say it was a coach that worked on my resilience and I if I hadn't met Charles Van Comenie um I don't know where I'd be he was a game changer for me you know to have achieved an an Olympic bronze medal in 1996 to have become a Commonwealth gold medalist the first time without him felt different it felt like I was still learning what it actually takes to to compete um I'm not saying there was luck involved in that but it was just like I hadn't put all the pieces in place to make me more resilient and to think differently about winning and losing um in fact I didn't actually think about winning oh losing sorry I didn't actually think about losing it was all about how do you win and how can you become a better athlete and so Charles was that person for me and I would say I met him um in 1994 um after that Commonwealth Games victory and we um you know i'd seen him in action and coaching other people um but it wasn't until after that 1996 olympic bonds medal where i almost threw it away i nearly didn't end up on the podium i knew i needed to make a change and he was that change and so that was significant yeah sure um and so for me it was how can i become anti-fragile how can i take the losses that will inevitably to become on the chin and so I don't crack how do I stay believing that the Olympic gold medal is is a reality and I can make that happen um so it's about stripping back dissecting and really getting to know yourself as an as a human being so that introspection that you need um was everything and he began to tease and ask the questions that I in turn had to find the answers to when you want your spring break to feel like and your kids pool day to feel like and your hotel bed to feel like oh and room service to feel like because at Hilton hospitality feels like your cabana's ready would you like fresh towels It matters where you stay.

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8:38Denise Lewis:There's a visualization element to this as well. And I want to ask you literally how you've used that at any one time. Because you can back yourself and you can train. But then there's an element of actually imagining it. and then making sure you have everything you're working towards that is in flow to get to that. And one day what experience you've had of that with visualisation or manifestation?

9:02John Reynolds:Yeah, the manifestation, how I began to use it more effectively the more I began to trust it. So it's simple things, you know, you're sitting on a bus, you're sitting on the train and you're reliving movement patterns. you're finding the rhythm of each of those seven events that I used to do what what is that element that will make me feel my movement and I could recreate those in my head um and we'd practice like you know a lot of hours as you can well imagine and we'd practice things like throwing with my left hand I'm right hand dominant but practicing with my left hand throwing what does bad feel like what does uncomfortable feel like and then flipping that to okay good feels like this and so in your mind you can actually you can create and move pieces around in your mind and then channel what a good performance should look and feel like gives

10:10Denise Lewis:you perspective right yeah rather just just staying in the highest etch along you allow well not necessarily deliberately but allowing yourself to experience the bad and then that makes the good feel better and then you know you've got that yeah you've got that perspective and

10:23John Reynolds:that came into play when i got injured um ahead of the sydney olympics um i'd been commonwealth i'd just set a new british and commonwealth record i think it was the end of june the games or the heptathlon wasn't due to start until uh mid-september and i got injured not long after setting a new British record um and that's when the power of the mind really came into the fore that sense of having to believe that I could get to the start line but using the tools and that visualization to its utmost effects really to keep my body almost in the game yes even though it was a race against time for my fitness I needed to keep my mind razor sharp and and focus on the control

11:15Denise Lewis:things I could control that's it's compelling to hear isn't it because you would have you would have been in phenomenal physical shape so anyone looking at you be like she's an athlete but this can go so your head can go and the mindset and you then really focus on because you can't you couldn't actually train right so then you can work harder on the mind the mental side yeah and I think

11:35John Reynolds:you know i do believe that you can you can use these tools in life that it's not just something that's reserved to high performance um but i utilize that skill um to its maximum effect because i had no other distractions i was an athlete that's all i wanted to be and all i all i did um i think that challenge i think as i've moved from high performance into various other roles um it's how much do you then use that to to just get you through life really yeah

12:11Denise Lewis:i would uh call you out as a amazingly positive role model and to be at the legends of sport women in sport ball uh last year see you're up there with women that have already achieved and have gone on to achieve you know the red roses winning the world cup for rugby that hadn't happen during that time of all and then there's a amazing um trajectory of women's sport which you're at the heart of and i bring i made that point because of the the mentoring the role model piece i want to go into that but just quickly when you were actually competing all that time ago so to speak was there a role model for you i think definitely there were role models but

12:52John Reynolds:Whether people remember them, you know, is another thing. But Sonia Lannerman was instrumental. She was a young sprinter from the Midlands, from Birmingham. And I could see her on the track. She used to train my local club, Wolverhampton and Bilston. I knew she was a junior, an international, sorry. And, yeah, she'd been to the Olympics. And it was just like, wow, okay. So as a young girl, seeing someone that looked like me, um have been where i wanted to get to was everything the best way to learn right someone

13:27Denise Lewis:that's achieving what you want to achieve that spends the time with you as well yeah i'd said

13:32John Reynolds:hello i'd watch her move just the discipline the you know the regimented way that she would just conduct herself on the track you know she was a woman on a mission purpose and um you know i just think at the time we didn't have a huge amount of role models until I became a senior international and then you were watching the likes of Sally Gunnell become Commonwealth European world and Olympic champion and then you're like okay we've still got some work to do you know as women on the team of the team athletics team we were I guess we were viewed as just making up numbers And that was sort of that.

14:16John Reynolds:All our men are getting medals and we are just there. And it was really incumbent on us as women to feel and to make a difference and to raise the game. And I think Sally really did that. And she inspired me also to believe that I could go on to victory.

14:37Denise Lewis:That's a really important part of the conversation because there's a, I imagine probably the word is fulfillment that you now get from being able to help and work with women and probably that transcends to business as well, right? Because the same skills, if you like, of mindset and self-belief are transferable at that high performance level, if you like. And have I chosen the word right there for fulfillment? because the personal success that you enjoyed in your actual career have you almost achieved a certain amount of that through working with people that you've been able to in any way mentor and then see them succeed and then a lovely glow not not in it not taking credit but just that whole

15:17John Reynolds:like actually that must feel really good I did not think I would feel the level of highs I have got since retiring again you know competing at the you know the various championships over the years gave me so much and when I retired I thought well that's it there'll be no Everest there'll be no peaks to climb but that mentoring piece and watching other athletes come through well in particular that I've been very close to over the last eight years sort of just it's such a glow it's so warm it's so life-affirming that you can make a difference in someone else's life through your lived experience and to just flag have you thought about doing it this way and recognizing when an individual is struggling and possibly haven't hasn't got the courage to reach out and ask for help and say do you need something do you want to talk and then being brave enough to say

16:18Denise Lewis:yes exactly and knowing that you're a safe space to do that and they don't have to feel that they've got all the answers and that just because they're supposed to be the the best or have the potential to be the best in this and then they're at any one time failing to reach those levels that they can then have that chat with you and then you can guide and you can mentor yeah i can feel that was there a moment though between retiring and and did you go straight into where i'm going with it is that identity piece that can really cripple athletes sports people where they've had the adrenaline the momentum that goes with with what you had in your career adulation front page back page to then have it did you have a moment where there was an element of like what do i do now

16:59John Reynolds:did you did you flow no i didn't know i'd even flow it was my god what do i do now you know that feeling of retiring is just i would say it's crippling because the i think the first emotion is really oh thank god i'm released from the pressure um the training the relentlessness of the training, the scrutiny. I can be, I can go back to being who I used to be. But the reality is you're not. You are a different person. And there has to be an acceptance and a realization that, okay, things are going to look differently. But I was not prepared for that feeling of loss that weighed very heavily in my soul um my whole identity had been wrapped up in the performance the performer um and so having to find that again and we weren't very good at talking and sharing those emotions those things that um and emotions that you kept very much to yourself and had to sort of work out and almost it's it's it's not um endearing is it to feel weak in the era that i i grew up in that's so get yourself pull yourself together type of thing yeah that feeling of resentment that you just aren't prepared for i thought it was just going to be a natural move on um there was no fanfare there was no sense of thanks for your years of service It was just nothing.

19:11Denise Lewis:together quite like Team USA at the Olympic Winter Games. From NBCUniversal's iconic storytelling to the innovative technology across Xfinity and Peacock, Comcast brings the Olympic Games home to America, sharing every moment with millions. When Team USA steps onto the world stage, people aren't just watching, they're cheering together. This winter, everyone is all on the same team. Comcast, proud partner of Team USA. How long did that, how long did you stay in that place? Because that's probably quite dark. It's hard, isn't it? Yeah, yeah, totally, yeah. No, but it's, but there's an empowerment around talking about it because, you know, you're fulfilled in so many different ways now and glowing, but going back to that time, how long did it take for you to work your way through that, if you like?

19:59Denise Lewis:And I imagine a certain amount of masking as well, where you don't want to, you actually don't want to show that you're like, yeah, I'm fine, I'm fine.

20:04John Reynolds:Well, it's an ugly, it's an ugly emotion. Isn't it? You know, you want to be, I've had a great career. I was an Olympic gold medalist. How dare you be this miserable individual and not able to get over it. And so I would say it was a good couple of years. I remember going to the Beijing Olympics and watching it and feeling physically sick. It was the first time that I would have been watching the Olympics, not as a performer.

20:36Denise Lewis:That's significant.

20:36John Reynolds:And I was like, oh God, this is horrible. And you're sitting there thinking, do I want anyone to do well? And it was just embarrassing. It was horrible. I've come to know and realize that it's an emotion that athletes go through. I think we still need to do more to help people with that transition. And it's got better, it has, back in my time.