Financial Audit's First Throuple

26:10What are we trying to accomplish? Because I'll help anyone try to accomplish whatever their financial mission is What are we talking about? Integrating finances in a better, healthier way. We want to get out of this debt. I want, I know for myself, I want us to be on a healthy footing, especially financially. Yeah. And I, since I brought the debt in from outside, you know, previous life experiences, I don't want to bring it in and have them pay for it. I'd rather cover it myself and then any debt. I mean, hopefully no more debt. So we're still viewing it theirs in mind. Theirs in mind. Theirs in mind.

26:43I have already told her. I know. I have a lot of trouble letting go. We are so willing to help cover anything if we get there before she does. Are you both by? Yes. Okay. That helps. Okay.

27:01I'm going to go 3, 2, 1, go. I'm going to go 3, 2, 1, points. On points, I want you all at the exact same time to give me what you think your household financial score is. zero to 10. Zero being the absolute worst, 10 being the absolute best, okay? Three, two, one. One, two. Zero. Okay, zero, one, two. Gotcha. Ladies and gentlemen, if you want your financial score, take the assessment for free at calebhammer.com. See where you stand in the world of finance to see where you need to improve, see where you're doing well. And don't forget, my favorite budgeting app is the DollarWise budgeting app.

27:41Make sure you download it if you don't want to be like a guest who ends up on this show, sign up, take the trial, and if you like it, save a lot of money by switching to the annual version. And if you do, I will sign our budget-friendly cookbook and I'll mail it directly to you. Join the tens of thousands of other people who have already. Okay, you can learn more about that at DollarWise.com. Let's jump into this. You're just going to have to tell me whose accounts are whose as we go on because this is a lot of confusion.

28:14Okay. The fuck am I seeing? Oh, this looks like a mortgage. This one's chunky. And this is$3 ,000. Without yoring. Hold on. Okay. $3 ,100.17. Defined by what was coming in when it was just you two until this last month. What was that? $6 ,000? I mean, the math is pretty darn close. But yeah, 52 % of our household was going to mortgage. That's crazy. And now, okay, we're at$8 ,900. I mean, now it's still 34 % pushing into not the most comfortable area. But, you know, we're within reason, especially if we're looking gross income. Did you only bring her in so we could afford the mortgage? No. Because it's kind of what it feels like.

29:03I actually don't want that house anymore. I didn't really want it from the beginning. Why the f*** do we have it and a big-ass 6 % mortgage on it? It was actually supposed to be 7%. They paid it down to 6%. You guys paid it down to 6%. No, no. Who paid it down to 6 %? The sellers paid it down to 6%. What the f*** is this place? It's chunky. It is a chunky payment. It is in the absolute middle of nothing. Desert surrounded by mountains. it's not a trailer home but it kind of looks like a very long one it's all brick um mexican brick but it's very narrow isn't it very narrow very long yes oh mexican brick i'm glad we got diversity brick look private student loans can make you feel like you're one missed payment away from selling your grandma's heirlooms we miss you grandma why refi says chill out no more sacrificing the family jewels they don't reduce you to a credit number they actually want to see if you actually plan on paying them.

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32:27So you want to code? Cool. Stop Googling and start training. Go to boot.dev and use code CaleBHAMMER to get 25 % off your entire first year on the annual plan. Very outdated. So if we're considering selling it, that makes me a bit nervous. I mean, you know, old carpet, old kitchen. Believe it or not. So there's what? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9 humans living in this house? Yeah. Stand by. Yeah, I think 9. I think that's right. Yeah, nine. That's fucking insane. This is not a big enough house for that. No. Listen, people desire bigger houses than they need all the time in this country. You guys, a larger house would be, oh, wait, how many beds?

33:13Three beds, two baths. How do we fit nine? What are we doing? We're bunking. People are bunking. There was also a large office space that we turned into a bedroom. Okay, that helps. And mom is getting her, is fixing up her own trailer. You're calling her mom. Huh? I call her mom. She calls her mom. Does mom accept that? Mom prefers mom. Yeah, she prefers it. Even though she hates that you guys are a thruple? Mom and grandma are her preferred terms. Yeah. Even though she hates that you guys are a thruple. Yeah. Oh. Yeah, I know. It's a lot. She's fixing up her trailer to live on. Are we selling it if you don't want it?

33:51I mean, what are we trying to do here? The goal is to sell it. And grandma and grandpa understand that as well. but there is a trailer casita that they're fixing up on it currently. They're going to live in a trailer on a property that you're not going to own? Well, when it sells, then they'll get whatever's left over, basically. Huh? What do you mean, what's ever left over? From the sale, like what's owed on the house. Why would they get that? Do they own the house? No. Wait, hold on. Who has the house? Who's the name? They would get paid back on whatever, because they put all the money into the casita on the property.

34:26So the casita is the casita. It's another word for like a small property. So the trailer is like an extra like mother-in-law apartment essentially. So they get the money for the trailer. Yeah, basically. Okay. Once it's sold. $437 ,911.06 with a minimum monthly payment of$3 ,100.17. You want to sell? We want to sell. You want to sell? It looks like I don't have much of a choice now, doesn't it? Well, I feel like you should be allowed to have at least a say. I understand you guys love each other. It feels like the dynamic is not very fair. Does his opinion not matter in this? Well, I would say my opinion doesn't matter against those numbers, now does it?

35:15Well, you guys can afford the mortgage now with a threesome, and you guys talked about bringing in a second dick, so. It would be more than just a penis. You'd be a loved penis.

35:38Your opinion on selling the house that you just moved into? Just based on the numbers, that's astronomical. What is? The minimum monthly? The minimum monthly. Where would you guys go? What would you do? There's a lot of people who are trying to house. Like looking at the market and compared to the other houses, this is ridiculous. Oh, looking at the market, it's currently, oh, it's sold? Okay, what's it? Yeah, I mean, you guys would break even after fees and commission, maybe even lose money. So. Yes. So it does have a couple of upgrades. It does barely have any equity in it. Yeah, a couple of, what are the upgrades?

36:11So it's going to have the second property on it. And it also is going to have solar on it. Okay, that doesn't really translate very well. It really doesn't. That does not translate in the cell of a house. In fact, a lot of people pick up and move. The bathroom is upgraded as well. It's going to be upgraded. Okay, bathroom and kitchen definitely holds the weight the most. So you don't even get a ring. You see that? You see how they're both wearing one? You see what's happening? Okay, but I think, well, actually, especially if you renovate the kitchen and it doesn't move the needle very much, you guys are going to lose money based on what you put in and walk away from.

36:51Then you got to pay the parents based on what they put in. What did the parents put in so far? So far, I think it's somewhere around$10 ,000. So you have to pay them$10 ,000 off of this. Yeah, I mean, you guys are going to, where are you coming up with the extra$20 ,000 that you're likely just going to have to pay out of pocket? If you sell this house, you guys can't sell this house. You're in a f***ing position. Where is the selling this house? Guy doesn't even want to sell the house. So you got lucky that the numbers don't make sense to sell the house. Well, you know, thank God for miracles like this, huh?

37:21Yeah, I'd say so. Wow, this really is absolutely... Whoa, there is no... Oh, my gosh, there is nothing nearby. The closest thing is just the country of Mexico. But still nothing there. Oh, my gosh, you guys are... How the f*** do you guys even have jobs? that's crazy what are our commutes this is crazy how are you upgrading the kitchen because you guys have no money or bathroom because you guys have no money there's this debt stacked upon debt how are we possibly doing that so my mom is actually doing it so is that included in the 10 or is that going to be additional so again that's still like $20 ,000 you're going to have to come out like you're going to have to do probably 6 % for you know realtor commission on both ends you know 3 % each now it can be less and now it can be paid by this buyer but we're in a buyer's market so good luck with that it's going to be paid by you and that's if you even get it for what Zillow is estimating and usually they're pretty nice about their values

38:30okay we have now listed when were we attempting to list I don't know if this was ever actually gone through more than, you know. Where do you guys want to go? Cheaper. What can you get that fits as many people that's cheaper? Same area, cheaper. So my mom actually, they have a piece of property. Why aren't they on that? That's where they want to build. But they've already built on yours. Yeah. Everything kind of. Everything. Yes. Yeah, absolutely. So it went haywire. This doesn't make sense. Yeah. What, with the deaths? With everything, yeah. Okay. I think it was pretty much when you guys moved to New York.

39:23Why'd you even get this house if we didn't want it? So the property wasn't supposed to be for them. The property was supposed to be for my nephew. The one you bought? The one that they bought. I don't give a fuck about that one. Why'd you guys buy this when you didn't want to? Well, that's why they didn't move onto that property. I don't give a fuck about that. Why'd you buy this house when you did not want to? Because he wanted this house. He wanted this house. Yeah. Okay. So we did want this house. Huh? I asked to back out of the house. And he said, no, you at least put your foot down in something.

39:52Yeah, well, look at what good it's done us. Well, you're more just locked in for a little bit. I mean, again, with the triple income, you do. It's in the gray zone. That's good news. I'll take the wins where we can get them. before this and I'm not trying to point any elbows but her mother has a habit of buying horrible run down property, fixing it about halfway up and then things sideways for one reason or another and this has been a feature it's not a bug, it's a feature and so we were living in one of those after trying to come back from New Hampshire and that one was... You guys own a New Hampshire?

40:35We did own a New Hampshire. We did. That was also a good loss. That was a loss. Yep. So. No offense. Why New Hampshire to the literal middle of nothing? Well, so around that time, my job was experiencing a lot of cuts, like a lot of cuts. And COVID was just heating up. And I'm an insane libertarian. And New Hampshire is the libertarian capital of America. So I was like, I'm going to be out of a job pretty soon is what I assumed. And I realized that I had just enough gas in the tanks to get us to wherever we were going to crash land. That was all that was left. Which was New Hampshire? Yes. So you went from Arizona to New Hampshire.

41:20That's right. And so I went and bought a place out there, kept the job, and I kept working. And the idea was to keep doing that until I'm not quitting. They're going to cut me, right? And so now I was juggling two payments for a little bit. I moved Alice out there. I didn't lose my job. I got a promotion, actually. Oh, well, that's good. It was a surprise that I wasn't ready for. Sometimes it's good surprises. Sometimes it's confusing ones. And I was not supposed to be able to get pregnant without medical intervention. and then I ended up pregnant. It always finds a way, just like you need to find a way to that microphone.

42:06Yeah, so I ended up pregnant

42:10and there was no medical help within an hour drive from where we lived. You were in the middle of nowhere in New Hampshire as well. So not really. We weren't that far from like Concord, but the issue is so many people had moved in. Are you close to medical now? Yes. Where? There's a hospital either way about - Couple hours? Half hour. What? Yeah. Surprising. Okay. So - So you moved back from medical. We had to move back from medical and it ended up being a high risk pregnancy. So I had to move back. There was no option. Okay. I'm okay with that. It didn't have to be a permanent move, but okay.

42:51It looks like it has resulted in - When we move, are we trying to go back to New Hampshire or stay in Arizona? No, my job's here You like Arizona? Yeah I don't Well, no, of course not And she doesn't Well, no, of course not It's just a hot desert in the middle of the - I mean, if you guys were in at least like Phoenix Where you could do things, it would be nice Or like, you know, Flagstaff Yeah It's pretty, but - Yeah, Flagstaff is gorgeous I would be happy If we lived there, I'd be happy Sure, instead you live on a cactus Yeah, basically Okay A hot, hot cactus. So, yeah. Okay. Well, mortgage only okay because she came in.

43:36Right now, currently. If she didn't, it would be f***ed. It's pretty f***ed, yeah. And whose name is the mortgage under? Joey's and mine. Okay. Platinum Plus. Platinum Plus of what we owe$38 ,172.21. Yeah. Who's what when where what What the f*** Both of you you're in it together All of our accounts are joints I'm just gonna call you guys Okay Well this is insane Yeah You're over the limit did you know you're over the limit I'm not trying to have you have more anxiety But what the f*** We know You know do you know He didn't know why are you saying we know He doesn't know why can't he say we Well, then why would you say we?

44:26That's not fair. Don't speak for him. He doesn't know what's going on. And the dude struggles with this. Yeah, that's why I don't tell him. And technically he does. Why would you say we? Stop speaking for him. Because he's gotten phone calls. So he does know. He might not know what accounts. Might not know. Okay, what's going on with this card? They're willing to settle on that one. They're willing to settle for what? For half. Okay. so 38 ,000 half up front? Probably. There's no way you could afford half. In what world? $38 ,172.21 so it looks like we're stuck with this

45:10I don't even know what the normal minimum It's about$1 ,000. That's the normal? You paid$200 last time? Thoughts on that? You paid 20 % of the minimum payment. Which one is that one? The 30? 38. Yeah. 38 ,000. Yeah. That one's right now. It's a, it was 200. It went up. And it's now. Did it just three periods end or something? So when? Oh no. Hey, pause. What do you think your past do? Oh, shit. What do you think their past do? I have no idea. You don't know. You're getting into this. Dude, you're flying into a hurricane right now. You have no idea. This is insane. This is insane. Yeah. I don't know.

45:52I couldn't tell you. What do you think, big guy? Uh. Ladies and gentlemen of Financial Audit, this is one of the most exciting moments in this channel's history. You know I've been working on building all these educational tools, our budgeting app, all this crazy stuff over this past year because that is where my passion is. We finally did it, and now we put it all into one program called Dollar Wise Central. You get the premium version of my budgeting app. You'll get the cookbook mailed to you and signed by me. You get to learn about debt, investing, budgeting, real estate, basic beginner stuff, and finance all the way to the advanced stuff.

46:31Collaborated by experts with the lowest refund rate in the industry for a reason. And guess what? If you are struggling or you want to learn more or you want to change your life in any way whatsoever, like literal tens of thousands of people have done with our programs, go to DollarWise.com. Click that link below. Your life will change. It'll be incredible. And I am here for you with an incredible support team that you can reach at any time. This is a no-brainer. DollarWise.com. Let's f***ing go! Let's rip that band-aid off. How bad is it? $3 ,154. Past due. Past due. $3 ,000 past due. Why the possible f***, guys?

47:10Because I was the only one we couldn't pay. Like, we paid everything else because we didn't have enough money. Why were you then going and doing things? because we're terrible at this no see the real answer is because we blew our f***ing money not because oh we paid the things and we didn't have enough money guys going out to eat what do we think that's high thousand dollars it was a thousand dollars it was a thousand thirty five going out to eat and you say you can't make a thousand dollar payment just say a thousand a month yeah that's you're going out to eat last month and you say you can't make a thousand dollar minimum monthly payment on a credit card because you pay your other bills That's a bullshit excuse that is immaturity to its core.

47:54Miscellaneous bullshit. This could be video games. This could be anything like that. It's just extra whatevers. That is$1 ,630. So now we are up. $1 ,600. $1 ,630. So now we are up to bullshit. Minimum bullshit. $2 ,660. $2 ,660. Minimum on bullshit. Last month alone. Now there's more stuff in here. There's unknown shopping of about$1 ,002. dollars. Some might be bullsh**. Some might not be. I don't know. We're going to have to go through it. Yeah, that's usually like Amazon or Walmart because you can get anything there. So it could be necessities. Yeah, we do a lot of grocery shopping at Walmart.

48:29And we'll go through those and we'll see. Other large purchases, things that didn't really fit in the category but were huge. That was$4 ,000. $4 ,000. That wasn't housing. That wasn't vehicles. That wasn't transportation. That wasn't groceries. It was, I'll tell you, f**k. In a month? In a month. That was last month, in fact. That's what's going on. When you just let control go away, then anxiety will build and it will hit you like a bomb. Yeah, it sure is. What the f*** goes on? What the f*** goes on? Do you need a moment? No, I'm at work all day. I was doing school all night. I had the f***ing GI Bill where they pay me to go to school.

49:18It's a second job. It's a second job. The school's not helping me. There's no aspect of my life that's better for this. I'm deployed to my f***ing life. I wouldn't, I couldn't go and walk through the house to go to the bathroom. I'd piss outside so I didn't have to walk past my kids because I knew they would take too long to see them and say hi. I f***ing, I'm a ghost in my own reality to try and earn as much money as I can. What were those numbers?

49:54It's not great. Is this for just us or all three of us? All three combined. That's all three of us. But all the debt is combined as well. Okay. Because if you say your ultimate goal is to combine, that's how we went off of it. Yeah, that's fine. That's the ultimate goal. He asked a good question that I would like to hear your perspective. What the is going on? Well, honestly, I... Valid from him. To be fair, I had a very strict budget for a very long time. I have an Excel spreadsheet and these last two years since, since getting, honestly, since getting pregnant, I, I couldn't handle life anymore.

50:31Couldn't do it. And I reached out for help, but he also couldn't do it. And we have been kind of drowning since. It was two mortgages and then it was a business and then it was a funeral. And then it's just been one thing. This is Cope Talk. It is. He said, what the f*** is going on? We went over minimum$2 ,660 of bulls*** minimum. Minimum. That's what he's asking about. It's just been bullshit ever since. That's what he's been asking about. Not your past mortgage, double mortgage, your past blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. No, but it always is. Last month alone was$2 ,660 of bulls*** minimum. and it's likely closer to like three to four thousand okay because that's what we usually see so what the is going on if you're the one managing finances why is it such a disaster why is it gone why is it obliterated why is guy out there working his off beating pavement for the money to just go completely out the door and he doesn't know and all of a sudden he has a panic attack because you just endlessly abuse your situation your situation where you get to control the entire thing give me a little bit of insight here Nothing.

51:39No self-reflection. To be fair, I honestly don't know. No self-reflection. What's your thoughts on this? Look what's going on over here. What's happening? I think that they're both at what's end. One with family life and the other with work life, which I've been saying for some time now. What's your solution to that? Joey's not in school, so he doesn't have as much stress on his plate now. I'm hoping that having him involved more with the kids will help mom feel a little better. I also think that mom just needs to go back to work I do need to go back What about the school thing that you guys got into?

52:17Waiting on an interview and if I get that interview it starts October 2026 And we can't work I'm doing work in school Yeah you have to But also with the eating out I know a large portion of that is probably on Ella's plate I think I have like But if our goal is, well, 300 would be about her portion of her splitting it in thirds, by the way. But either way, either way, if we're trying to combine, this is what combined looks like. If that is our ultimate objective, this is what combined looks like. And when I'm doing all of the stuff out with the kids, everything's expensive. And so when they want something, I have, things have been stressful at home and I cave.

53:03I do. I cave when it comes to the kids. when they want to go and have McDonald's, I do it. Well, you're making their future harder. I am. And I understand that. How you feeling, Joey?

53:16I knew this was going to be rough. This is fucking shocking.

53:28So, you're about to make a trade based on a friend's text. But which you do you listen to? Is it, we could buy a house in Tulum. Get optioning those options. We could lose everything. Or let's do a little research. Get your head in the trade and make the investment decision that's right for you. Learn more at finra.org slash trade smart. I'm sorry. It's okay. Listen, buddy, a little bit of tough love here. You're Staunch libertarian so let me give you some Ron Swanson Okay? Thank you This Is all your choice This is all personal responsibility If you choose not to be involved Then it goes off the cliff You got a bit of responsibility in there And unfortunately the only way to take care of your Fiscal responsibility Is to be involved and get in there You gotta cut You gotta cut that government spending in your budget This is bloat, this is pig, this is pork You got pork bloat going on here, buddy.

54:36And you're not collecting enough tax revenue because you got to. She's getting tax subsidized right now. That's what's going on. I, you know, I knew that there was a lot of interest. I knew there was a lot of stuff that got run up. But there's a lot that's going on here that doesn't make sense. There's a lot of numbers here. I do know that a lot of the stuff that is like Walmart and all of that is going to be a lot of food. We have a huge, and I know this is a problem. We have a huge grocery budget with feeding a lot of people. It wasn't that crazy. But even are your parents, what's your parents contributing?

55:17You said a flat rate. What is it? $1 ,000. That helps. Highly doubt it enough. We buy most of the groceries. And so I do know when you see those Walmart charges, that's groceries. It's going to be mostly groceries, kids clothes, that sort of thing. But we probably are spending, I know every time I go to the grocery store, I'm spending somewhere between$200 and$400. And I go twice a week. May I chime in on this? The pallet is also - Do you have to ask permission in your house? I just didn't want to interrupt. I just didn't want to interrupt. She doesn't like interrupting. The food that is eaten in the house is a bit, it could be on the cheaper side.

56:03It's on the bougie side. It is. It's on the bougie side. I'm used to eating a lot cheaper. What reason? Should you're$300 behind on a credit card? Why do we get to get the bougie groceries? Excuse me, to correct,$3 ,000 behind on a credit card. Yeah. On the first, we've looked at one credit card. One credit card. $3 ,000. I'm not saying that's going to like cure everything, but I know little things and I know that I'm a problem, too. I get fast food. I'm I'm just as bad. But I do know that like some of the food, it's like, yeah, we do. You don't have to get like certain things. You could have a couple like it could be a big struggle meal and, you know, and still be good and delicious, but good enough.

56:42We are giant foodies and I know it's a problem. I do know it is a problem. I'm just saying, look at what we are doing when we're behind on credit cards. You say, oh, I made all my payments on everything else, so that's why I can't make this$1 ,000. $2 ,660 at a minimum, minimum, minimum on bullshit. You could have almost made the entire back payment. And within two months, just by not having that bullshit, you would have. All right, what am I looking at here? I have no – it's a principal balance of$16 ,586 ,025 and an interest rate of 10%. What am I looking at? That is the loan we got A personal loan?

57:23Yes Okay, who's? Ours You're on it together Yes, that was from New Hampshire What the fuck? New Hampshire? What do you mean personal loan for New Hampshire? It was to fix up the house that we got in New Hampshire But then we ended up having What did you buy the house for? The price? I actually don't really I think it was$140 $140? I think so What did you sell it for? $135 so that loan ended up actually right and you're going to do that again

57:57You said her mom has the track record of going in and just getting properties she can't afford f***ing around and then selling it for like a loss. I think that's your guys' track record too. It's starting to feel that way, isn't it? Mm-hmm. There are other two houses we sold in at a very nice profit. Two for four. Yeah. It's not a good batting record. Okay, so this is a personal loan on a house that's long gone, essentially. Yes. That's insane. I'm already just hearing this conversation, Alice, so far. are you not nervous to get involved on this on a deeper level? Because oh my f*** I would be.

58:38I did hear a little bit about this. Look what we've heard so far. I recommended the show to them. Really? Yeah, because I was like, I know that they have some issues. And I started kind of watching the show and I was like, oh, it's kind of getting back on track with my financial stuff. And I think that they really needed the help. Yeah. And I was gunko about it. Like when she told me about it, we immediately signed up. Yeah. And I know you almost didn't come on the show. No, I, if I see an advertisement for a bank on my phone, I scroll very quickly past it. I sympathize. I've got really bad agita.

59:17Have you ever talked to someone about this, a therapist, about this phobia? No. Because you're a libertarian doesn't mean you have to disagree with therapy. Yeah, we've had this conversation. I'm a libertarian and a pain in the ass. Who knew? They usually go hand in hand, yeah. Your brain's a brain, dude. There's people who study it. There's some enablement therapists out there. There's some TikTok bullsh** therapists out there. There's some people that will actually help. There's some good people. You got to shop around, and I don't think you probably have an extensive selection area. You might have to go virtual.

59:50But there are actual therapists that focus on a specific phobia like you have. I have one that focuses on mine. and I did a, again, I told you about how I conquered it this weekend. That's crazy. Never thought I would. You can do that. And it can be a whole other life on the other side. I mean, once he's informed, like it's the unknowing that's even more scary. I mean, yeah, it's stressful to know, but at least you have a goal and a way to progress when you don't know. It's like, well, I'm crushed, but I don't know how crushed. And like, I got us out of debt the first time, but it wasn't so hard, you know.

1:00:26First time you've gotten out of debt before. So when I'm when when I met him, he also has that a 11 years ago, 11 years, 11, 11. Who's the 16 year old? Was that from him? No. So it's my sister's child. Oh, OK, sure. Why not? Yeah, that makes sense. OK, so. So you got out of debt when you guys first met 11 years ago. Tell me about that. So he didn't want me dealing with the finances. he was very much so I can do it myself but then we were getting a lot of red slips in the mail and it finally came to a point where I'm like this isn't going to work you need to pay your bills and so I found all of the bills, gathered them up and it wasn't much but then how did we not learn from our behavior there and not want to approach that same situation again because now we're there again but worse probably It's way worse.

1:01:25No, it's way worse. This has never happened to us before. And over the six years, like, they were making good money. Yeah. So they got into a certain type of lifestyle, and I think they haven't adjusted. We did. Oh, fuck yeah. It will. Yeah, it will. So$16 ,586.25 on a personal loan for a house we lost money on. Okay. Great. $353.89 is your minimum monthly payment with an interest rate of 10%. Yeah, not beating the market with that one. if you're investing overall in the general stock market. Fuck's sake. Listen, I mean, I'll immediately, I'll get you guys a course career certification. If you don't get into the, you know, you all can have one.

1:02:08But primarily for you, if you don't get into the school, try to get something there and get yourself a better job. Like that has increased people's incomes and got them into new career fields substantially. If this doesn't work, my backup is phlebotomy. Okay. We'll get you guys the fifth card as well. It's a debit card that builds credit. So no more credit cards because look what you did with the first one. The plan of them is insane. I want them gone. Okay. Now I'm looking at a Visa signature. Yes. Whose is this? Us. You guys are on together. Yeah. All of us are together. Feel very included? Maybe eventually.

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1:03:24You just use your card like normal and earn Bitcoin back instead of points or miles. Bitcoin rewards earned and held for one year on the Gemini credit card have appreciated 277 % on average. You're investing as you spend. Truly a no-brainer. To sign up for the Bitcoin credit card, head to Gemini.com slash Caleb and get$200 in Bitcoin when you spend$3 ,000 in your first 90 days. You can see if you're eligible with no impact on your credit score. Click the link below or go to Gemini.com slash Caleb to apply and start earning instantly. See rates and fees in the description for more info. This isn't what I would want to be included.

1:04:01I don't think she wants to be included on this. No. When the debt's cleared up, no. $7 ,203.35. Minimum monthly payment of$226. and it's pretty close to maxed out. You made your minimum monthly payment. Can someone pull up this card on their phone? Maybe. Because, again, you're not sending statements here. You're sending a screenshot of a website. This is for a cash rewards visa signature. I need to see if there's any purchases. I need to see what's going on. When you paid this off, you took out a 401k loan to pay this off. So it wasn't even disciplined. Right? Right? Right? I did know about that one.

1:04:47Oh, for f***'s sake. Guys, how much did we pull from whose 401k? Whose 401k do you think it is? Oh, we are past doing that one. I got to pay that. So this is this right here. Is it yours? Of course. Why, why, of course, to be yours? Well, because you would have contributed more, I assume. How much did you pull out? How much did we pull out? For. Mike. I'm trying, I'm trying to think. Which one was that? That was my Visa signature card? Yeah. What's the minimum of the payment double all of a sudden? Oh, you passed through a payment. Pass through a payment now. They're passed through a payment now, guys.

1:05:25I didn't realize that one wasn't on auto pay. Guys, what are we? It's worse. It's worse. So, what is? You, dar. What is? What are we doing? I need you to open it again. For f*** sake. I don't remember. I honestly don't remember. I think we only ever took out the, did we take out, we took out the 401k loan for the funeral, but I think the only other one we took out before that, was that the 10 ,000? Twice? You took out twice? Yeah. I can pay that now. Oh, the second one was to pay for a funeral. Which, again, that's an emergency. I can kind of, but you've done it twice. We're just not learning behavior.

1:06:09Nope. We're not learning behavior. And now we're past due on our second card. And my team didn't even know that. Yeah. They didn't even have that. This is worse than even they thought. And they knew this was completely f***ed. And they reviewed. I'm sorry. Yeah. Caleb, you mind if I take a second? Please. Take a second. Thank you. I do want you to be informed about the full situation, though, still. I know it's hard.

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1:07:13I've got to call Dividend and have them put that back in there. Buddy, just open it up. I need to see this card. That was the card. I need to see it. All I saw is that you had a double payment. This card locked. Oh, okay. Yeah. Sorry. How's Guy doing? Not great. I knew this was going to be really, really tough because he doesn't know anything. Who do you like more? Does it work like that? No. I mean, Joey and I started dating first and then Ariel. And you weren't jealous when they were dating. There was issues, but it wasn't. Initially, yeah. Initially. I would have thought. But it was more of we actually started dating together first for the very first time.

1:07:58And I had brought up concerns. I need the phone. I had brought up concerns that This isn't What? Rewards? I don't care about rewards Where are you? I don't know Dude just get me to the f***ing credit card That she wasn't really into women And so when That's complicated Yeah And Joey kept saying no it's fine And then it turned out No she really didn't think she was at the time Wasn't sure I wasn't sure. So then we were, you know, on a break for a while. And then we had a lot of discussions when we finally did get back together. And things have been, like, way better. Like, way better. For sakes, such a mess.

1:08:44I'm glad there's at least no purchases on there this last one. No. Can't. I mean, they're behind. They're behind. What do you think we should do for him? So he just needed, like, a few minutes? Yeah, he probably needs a minute. He's probably getting some more water. He's probably going to need some time. He's probably going to need time. Like a lot. Well, before he comes back on? He's very angry and he's going to hold a lot of anger specifically at me. How does that look? How does that usually, what usually happens then? He's going to shut down. He's going to completely shut down. Well, why do you?

1:09:18No. I mean, you're behind on everything. Look what your choices have done. You've this. Yeah. Him. Yeah. It's not fair. It's not. And it's, listen, starting down is not the most productive way to deal with things, but yeah, he deserves to be upset. And he can be, but he was also asked on multiple occasions to be involved in the finances and he opted not to. So here we are. And that's why we're here. We need a Joey replacement. We need a Joey replacement. You're looking for a fourth. I have an applicant. And he's cute. Hi.

1:09:59How do you feel about Arizona? Ladies, I'm from Arizona. There we go. Oh, and he smells nice, too. I'm digging this. Enjoy. Joey 2.0. I need the rest of the day off, boss. Yeah. By the way, when I told him to come on, he was doing this heavily in the back. Allegedly. Never. Joey would not. If I know Joey like I know Joey. So, Joey, you're pretty upset? Because this is kind of f***ed. It's bad. It's bad. From hearing it from over there, it's pretty bad. Yeah, she's behind on two payments so far. Yeah. Big guy, your money that you go earn. Mm-hmm.

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1:11:07Yeah. I'm a... Sorry. You said it?

1:11:17Yeah, your tone's not very apologetic, I'll be honest. No. I'm a bitch. That's what you want. She's very happy about it. It's a very strange coping mechanism. It is. Why the f*** do you want to be involved in this? That's comedy? Oh, yeah. Wow, okay. Being broke is comedy? Get her on Kill Tony. I think it's a good, like I said, I think it was a good wake-up call for both of them. for Joey to know the situation and for Alice to know where, you know, the spending is going. Like, fully. Really, yeah. No, fully where everything's going. Is it a wake-up call to you about what the f*** you're getting into?

1:12:02Specifics, yes. It should be. I did know that it was already pretty bad. I was aware it was quite bad. Yeah, but the debt, you guessed, was$200 ,000 under the reality of the debt. Yeah. Okay, I mean, I have this prime visa, but I don't have, like, Again, you guys aren't giving statements away. Someone pull up the Chase Prime Visa. Is that you and Joey? Yeah. I don't know if I can get it. How's that one look, Joey? If we're going to take the data from the past two, probably f***ed. New Jersey accent, please. Yeah. But taking the data from the past two, probably f***ed. That's good. Who sleeps in the middle?

1:12:41Alex. That sucks. I actually like it. Really? It's so warm. Yeah, it's so cozy. Yeah, I need the edge. I'm a rotisserie chicken at night. I feel like someone's getting edge the whole time, that's for sure. You could have had a statement in about 15 seconds. This would have been so easy. Okay, here we go. We owe$3 ,863.86. Wonderful. First time hearing this, big guy, huh? with a minimum monthly payment of $116. Should we check on him?

1:13:22Yeah, you want to just see how he's doing? Oh. He's here. Yeah, we don't want him to get jealous. He's going to be jealous. No, he doesn't really get jealous. In fact, he might just want your hole. Big guy. Welcome back. The seat will be a little warm. Yeah. We had someone sitting in. Did it help taking a lap? Yeah. A little fresh air goes a long way. Yeah. Sorry, let me get that. Well, we just unlocked a credit card of$3 ,863.86 to bring you back down. Thank you. You're welcome. With purchasing, we're purchasing a credit card that will not be paid off. Minimum monthly payment without any purchases alone.

1:14:05This is your smallest balance so far. Yeah. How long do we think it takes to pay off without purchasing? Of which, by the way, we are purchasing. Probably like 10 years. 15 years. Okay. I was just going to assume 10, yeah. Yeah, 15. 15 years. And this is our smallest balance. Smallest balance.

1:14:27Yeah. You're going to be mid-50s. Oh, that's great. And then that one will be paid off. That one will be paid off. Well, if we don't purchase, but all we do is purchase. In fact, what did the purchase look like? I will tell you. Who's purchasing it? Amazon, Amazon, Amazon. Grubhubbing Whataburger. Family Dollar. Valley Sleep Center. That was for my neurologist. Medical. USAA. Yes. Is this you guys again? Yes. Wow. Okay. Everything is done. I don't have any credit cards open. Why are we bringing in? Why would you want to come into this? Like, I understand. Okay, you love them. Why would you want to come into this the way the account combines?

1:15:09Do you just want to combine so that we have our income? No. Because you guys are f***ed together. You two. I don't know how you would survive. There's no malicious intent here. None whatsoever. You don't f***. Okay. USAA. We have a credit card balance of$3 ,907.37. cents. It's at a 20.15 % interest rate. What was that interest rate? 20.15. Thank you. And they're all going to be around 30, by the way, so this one's actually even better than the others. With a limit of 4 ,400, so we're not that far from the limit by any means. We're going and we're stopping in. We're getting some bulls**t. We're stopping in.

1:15:52We're getting some bulls**t. Paris Baguette. Canteen vending machine. That's you. The vending machine. On the credit card. So big guy, here is what's going on. You are spending money. On a credit card that does not have much more money to spend on that is accruing interest. So this is where being informed on the facts of your financial situation is important because you cannot be going and blowing all this money. Who's stopping in the gas stations and getting just small little things? Because that's not gas purchases. We're not getting$3.65 of gas. So what are you getting? Breakfast. Okay. Yeah.

1:16:29We got to be packing breakfast or making breakfast. Yeah. Okay. That's cool. And if you're going to stay at home, make it. Contribute in that way. And I was for a long time. Like I really, we were doing overnight oats and stuff like that. The last few years have really, really cut deep. So, and I was just. So we have to. No. What? No. So we were just talking last night about getting back to a normal. We have lots of breakfast in this. We'll give you guys this and it's butcher friendly. I'm actually very excited about that. I saw a cookbook and I'm all about cookbooks. Well, I wish you could actually cook.

1:17:05Look, here we go. I mean, this is more, it's more savory, but you can have deviled eggs in the morning, okay? You love a good deviled egg. She does. Yeah, because you went and stopped in and got breakfast a few times, and then with the vending machine and the Paris baguette for 40 bucks. The Paris baguette was us. That was us. Nice little sweet treat. We did get a little sweet treat. A little sweet treat. Yeah, that was at my neurologist appointment. And listen, I want to know your perspective on this, Joey. Being a self-confessed libertarian yourself, that usually advocates for personal responsibility only.

1:17:46Like there's nothing outside of that. What do you think? What do you think now that you're hearing all this, how that vibes? I was under the impression that I could trust that this was getting taken care of, and it clearly hasn't been. And I can see that she— Inspect. Don't expect. Ah, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Hey, maybe let's let him answer. She loves me and she doesn't want to upset me. And I've really done a fine job of putting myself into a situation where I'm sure she feels that I'm unapproachable on this. And the consequences of it are clear. Do you not feel she controls?

1:18:39I, there are parts of life that you don't care that much about. There's plenty of my life I don't care about. I didn't think this was I had no idea it was this bad and this stupid It's one thing to be bad It's another thing to be stupid And I'm shocked To find out how much it is both Today And I realize that If I want out of this I'm going to have to be Part of the solution And I can't just walk away from it And hope that other people are going to make my life better.

1:19:16This is... What are you seeing in the dynamic coming into this? A lot of fear from Joey. I know I came in at a very stressful time. And are you sure they aren't, like, cope-loving? Because sometimes people look for extra things when life is hard. You know, they want to shake things up. Are you sure that once life gets back to normal, that the place for you is there as much as it is today? We've had feelings for each other for years and years. I've been in the position where I'm like, I'm not, I'm not ready. How did she convince you to enjoy vagina?

1:20:00She's a great talker.

1:20:07Ladies. Department of Education. Who? This is with Nelnet. Yeah, that's mine. Hey, it looks like total of... Does everyone have student loans or is it just you? I don't have any. Just me. $21 ,169 for what? And of course, you're the one making no money. You know, actually, I need to contact them about that because it switched over. To Nelnet? from another company from Great Lakes. Great Lakes, yep. And when I had last checked with Great Lakes, it was only at$12 ,000. But when it switched over... This was probably interest that accrued while it was all being like no payment required, dude. So when it...

1:20:51But that's when the last time I checked with them, it was at$12 ,000. Then when it switched over, it was at$21 ,000. And I was very confused by that. I would not be surprised. It's$21 ,069. So we're going to go off of that. I'm sure it sat there in accrued interest when payments required were zero. What's the status of these today? I know we're talking about getting back to school. Deferred. Until... Right. Next year? I think November. No, no. You requested an extra. I requested an extra. Why? You guys make money as a household and tax returns. I'm surprised they even allowed it. Yeah, those are deferred currently.

1:21:26Well, payment's going to be about, if you want to get it paid in about 10 years, $250 a month added to your guys' stack. Yeah. Extra 250 gone like that. Yeah. Why haven't you been paying on these? Just hasn't been. What did you get a degree in? Did you get a degree? So I got a certificate. I wanted to go in for. Certificate in what? Automated computer specialist. Back when that. Midi computer specialist. Automated computer specialist. Okay. And that was back when that meant something and now it doesn't. It's now a fancy word for I can be a secretary. But it did get me a job. Why not go be a secretary?

1:22:03Make money. Because nobody cares about that. Everybody now wants an associate's or bachelor's in something or the other. That's their perfect dream situation. Doesn't mean you shouldn't apply. Oh, I haven't been applying. I apply basically anything that makes anything. Well, I'm sure there's not many opportunities in that area. No offense. Not really. No, there's not. I've applied at basically everything that comes up. Yeah, I'm sure interest is just accrued. Yeah. They're in$0 phases. Even the ups and ups unsubsidized loans, when they're deferred, they might accrue interest. I'm not 100 % sure on that.

1:22:38And I don't know your mixture of subsidized or unsubsidized. Never been late, but we're also just not making payments. They've been undeferred since July. Oh, wait. No, that's just leading up to those. Yeah, I think that's in July might have been when it changed over to Nelnet. All right. Still going. Okay, what is Elan CACS credit card? Elan Financial? Uh-huh. That was a personal loan through. Oh, wait, excuse me. That was a credit card. This is finally yours. Yes. It's in collections. She has collections. She's bringing collections into the house. Yeah, we knew about that. Well, I knew about that.

1:23:20Yeah, what's this weed? Did you know she has collections? I don't know. I know nothing. What? The pattern continues. What is going on? Come on, you seem like the same one in this conversation so far. So that one, I only have two movements left on it. I have a debt relief for that one. So that's in debt relief. So I have two more and then I'm closing out. So am I going to see the debt relief statement in this paperwork? It should be in there, yeah. Okay, so I don't need to worry about this statement specifically. No, that was on this one. Why did credit card go into collections and how long ago?

1:23:44How long? This was, I want to say 2023. What happened? Me and an ex separated. so the financial situation changed and I couldn't afford everything on my own. So I let that stuff, the stuff that I could go in collections or, well, debt relief, I allowed it to go to debt relief. Well, I'm sure you're just blowing all your money on your kid too, just endlessly trying to cope with a single mom. There is some guilt spending for sure. Yeah, absolutely. And I know you're just blowing money on video games like crazy. That one's not such a big one. And then you're getting, you got a game PC, big arsenal of video games.

1:24:21Yeah, I don't spend too much on myself. There's a lot of... So just the kid? I do spend some on her. But you're deferring the kid's future. And all of a sudden, you're not going to have a retirement. Who knows if you're going to be with them by retirement's age. Yes. There's a lot of... She's even skeptical about that. You see that, guys? There's a lot of concern. What do we think of that? Is that weird to hear? Is that concerning to hear? Caleb, if you were coming in on this, would you stay? I wouldn't come in I get it I wouldn't be coming in and combining my finances And I wouldn't be combining life yet I'd be coming in and I'd be And that would be about it That's what I'd be doing I wouldn't want to incorporate my life into this No, but she's also bringing baggage She's bringing collections and debt relief programs So it's not like she's perfect by any means This episode is brought to you by State Farm Listening to this podcast?

1:25:18Smart move. Being financially savvy? Smart move. Another smart move? Having State Farm help you create a competitive price when you choose to bundle home and auto. Bundling. Just another way to save with a personal price plan. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. Prices are based on rating plans that vary by state. Coverage options are selected by the customer. Availability, amount of discounts and savings, and eligibility vary by state. Is she handling them? I don't know what right looks like. What do I fucking know what right looks like? You're looking at the things. Is she doing the right things?

1:25:53She's not doing the right things. She's doing the right things. Are you doing the right things? You're pointing fingers over here. Are you doing the right things? I'm keeping up with payments. So once this is finished, I'm transferring and paying off my small debt. And then it's like$415. That's going towards that. A month. A month. That you funnel to your next debt. Yes. That is the way. Yeah. And then once I have that done, that$415 will go to, I'm going to start with my smaller ones. I only have a couple of like, maybe like three that are like from$200 to$600, I think. Okay, well, we'll find them.

1:26:23What's CFT pay? That is the debt relief. Oh, the debt relief. Yes. Yes, I see. It's$446 a month. And you said there's two payments left? Yes. That's good. So she's almost out of her. Well, you guys are going deeper. Mm-hmm. How do we decide who he sticks it in? How do we determine? Do we draw straws? So he... Or do we like human centipede? He can stick it wherever he wants as soon as he gets a vasectomy. Well, of course, but like what if both want? Like how does he choose? How do you choose? You just put it in both, I guess. Well, yeah, I don't know if that's scientifically possible. Are you talking the technical?

1:27:06Yeah. Everybody's very busy.

1:27:12We got three of us and we don't even What's the point at that point? What? Nobody said that You know, every movie has a director And some people Some people like being the director I don't point any elbows or anything You are very often the director So nice try What, like cut corner? You know, you just Someone's got a game plan and then you run it You see where it goes Sometimes you're in the mood for cake Sometimes you're in the mood for Ginger ale You know It just depends Oh man Okay Okay

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1:28:17Oh, that's a lot of buttons. Ah, no. She's not in like the worst. Her balance on this is$892.26 and the minimum to payment is$446 which means it's paid off in two. But again, we're combining it like it's combined if our entire intent is to be combined. Right. See, guys, why? Why screenshots from web pages? This is so difficult. Yeah, I couldn't get a print off. It's just more information. Yeah, it's just more information on it. What about the same thing? Same thing, yeah. Okay.

1:28:54Money owed to friend. To whose friend? Mine. You owe your friend money. She owes her friend money. Yes. Did we know this? I did. You did. Okay. What do you owe your friends$5 ,000 for? Car. What? Yeah. Did they get the car and they paid for it for you or you got it from them and you owe them? Yeah, so basically purchasing off them. What is the car? A Nissan Versa Note. Is this a loan or is it just paid to them? It's a loan. It's a loan from a bank? Yes. Oh, no, no, no. What's the interest rate on it? Ooh, I don't remember. Why weren't you able to access it? Because I just have this written on a piece of paper.

1:29:38All sides of y 'all are disorganized. What's the minimum monthly payment on this? $150. Okay. Until I basically step up enough to pay it off and then get it switched over. And we don't know the interest. Okay. Me, when did you do this? 2022, I believe. Oh, okay. So this is around forever. Do we have the value on this car? It's very low. Uh-huh. It's very low. What is it, like two, three, one? Probably like$1 ,500. Oh, for f***'s sake, what are we doing? Is this car going to last? No. It's already having issues. Oh, it is? What are we seeing? Engine leak. Are you handy? Not really. Are you guys handy?

1:30:22The good thing about being broke is that you learn how to get more handy. I've been fixing my car a lot recently. And then I also am pretty handy with cars. Okay, so do we know what's wrong with it? I'm going to probably put a little more effort into looking to it. I think it's the fuel pump. For f***s sake, how long has this been going? She's been having issues with it for a while. Since I bought it. Since I bought it. Three years ago? Since I bought it. It was as is. We haven't learned, but we haven't figured out what's going on? No. It was a minor leak. It's not usually an issue. It's been having more issues lately.

1:30:59Yeah. Dude, this is crazy.

1:31:05And you can get to your job in this. Yes. Yeah, it runs. What happens when it doesn't? What do you do? The only thing it does is shut off after a certain amount of RPMs. That's it. And then you just turn it back on. Yeah, but what do you do when it doesn't? How do you get to work when it doesn't? She'll have to learn how to drive a truck. So there's a bonus truck sitting around? My mom has a spare truck. And your mom doesn't go anywhere? Not often. They have a couple of vehicles. She can't watch the kids. Okay. But the goal is to get it paid off and then trade it in. Get better. Yeah, trade it in for$1 ,500 and then get what?

1:31:44Okay, a firm. Who's the firm? Mine. Okay. What are you doing? Pull up your firm. Well, I see. It's Walmart. What are we getting on Walmart? So a firm. Yeah, just pull it up. This was for, hold on, manage. $300 to purchase something. This is for the Walmart. So we were doing really bad. While spending$2 ,600 minimum on bulls**t. Right? Yeah. Right? So we needed groceries, and we did that. Did he know? Did you even discuss with him? I think I tried to, but it didn't matter. You tried to. Now, when you did that, did he know you guys also blew$2 ,600 on bulls**t when you came and said, we don't have money to get groceries?

1:32:35I guess not. Exactly. Because how would that conversation have gone if she did bring that full information to you, Joey? What would you have said?

1:32:50I'm completely unprepared for any of this. It's a$26.76 payment. $365 is the balance. Now, Joey, something that I think is worth talking about while we're having this conversation is when you walked out, she said that you're probably furious, but what you're going to do is just shut down from that. What do you want to do from here? What do you want to see the productivity look like from here? Because if we just shut down, nothing's going to happen, right? What do you want to see happen from here? I work. I work really hard. I do the best that I can, and it looks like it's being squandered, and I'm not going to be able to retire.

1:33:44Look at this. How do I crawl out of this? Well, I get that. This sucks. But I want to hear what do you want this to look like going forward, the conversation, the finances, how we're managing it. Because, again, she says you're going to be very angry at this, and I think that is very valid. However, she says you're going to shut down, and I think that might be unproductive. So what do you want to do going from this conversation? I'm wondering if maybe I should be the one who's dealing with all this and maybe Alice ought to be the one who's on a stipend. I think that maybe we should all be dealing with this together as a group and not one person is the only one involved.

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1:35:45You will not regret any of these change your life today. You know, I might have been more inclined to agree with that.

1:35:56If these numbers are suggesting that what we're doing right now isn't working. Right. And what I've been doing is nothing. Right. and I have been asking you to do something with me for a long time. And I think it might be best if everybody is involved in the finances. I think having a budget that we're all aware of. Because I use the budgeting app, the dollar-wise. And I didn't know how much I spent on fast food. You just kind of like, it's like$10 here,$10 there. and I spend like$300, I believe, on fast food, which is outrageous. That's more than my grocery budget that I set for myself. Yeah.

1:36:42I think that's something you guys both need to really look at and keep to and like, even if you have to have like a limited amount that you can access to for emergencies until you guys kind of get out of this. What do you think of that? It looks like the only way forward is we're going to do this Javier Maile style. We're going to make big cuts. we're going to tighten the belt in ways that are incredibly uncomfortable. How are you going to approach that? How are you going to be a part of that conversation? I think that, first of all, therapy might not be the worst idea. This has come up a couple of times.

1:37:18And after this, I was so sick seeing all this that I had to leave the room. I couldn't even be near it. And this is my future that we're talking about. You're doing me a big favor right now. by trying to help make my life better. And I appreciate that. And right now you're the messenger and I'm incredibly unhappy with you for the things that you're telling me. You should be. And please don't take any of that personally, but I need to fucking get right. And I'm...

1:37:56I'm wondering how much of this should be a collaboration, how much I should just... I don't know. You can sit there and point fingers and say that all of this spending was me, but we know it's not. It's all of us. Yeah, I'm on there too. You're on here. I'm on here. I'm on here. You also go to the gas station. You also swipe for your energy drinks. Like, I know you don't do a bunch of it, but we're both really bad about when the kids want something. We get it for them. I get nothing for anyone. I get the taquitos.

1:38:32Let's go ahead and say – Toronto's a little gas station stuff. He actually gets taquitos, literal taquitos. Yeah, he does. He does get taquitos. Let's go ahead and – here, you got the calculator. What's – I don't know, probably$4 for the taquitos,$4 for the monster. Let's go ahead and call it$8 a day. Let's assume I do it. Let's assume I do. I have a coffee pot in my office. I do a pot of coffee a day. Just under$3 ,000 a year would be that. All right.

1:39:10I'm not blaming you either. I'm just saying we are all in this together. No, yeah. You should have been involved. You should have been involved. I should have been involved. But Alice has been. I've been the only one involved. Yeah.

1:39:28A lot of this debt came from Trying to start up the The business And it may have However it wouldn't be here today If we weren't blowing all that money on bull If the bullshit was going to pay it off Listen you went into debt for something Okay but now it's just continuing And we're behind on what Everything This is So Alice, do you feel like the numbers are off? Like you were looking at me at the beginning when it was being read off. The, I feel like they, well, cause like the, the, he was, but he had like said like some of that's Walmart and stuff like that. And that makes sense. Like once that got like, that makes sense.

1:40:09That's the unknown category. Yeah. Cause that, that does make sense to me. Cause we spend so much in groceries. You've seen it. You've been there with me doing groceries. It's insane. What's the health equity? Health equity? It's called health equity. That's me. That's my medical bill. I went to the ER. When? Within last year at some point. Did you get her pregnant too? No. Migraine, blood pressure, loss of consciousness, that kind of stuff. Okay. Well, why are you still going to fast food? Because I like it. Do we like having another emergency room visit soon? No. Blood pressure, fast food doesn't go great together.

1:41:01Yep. It's a fun fact. No. Okay. Yeah. I'm terrible and I love it so much. Believe it or not, even though the fast food looks horrible, I don't actually like eating fast food. It makes me horribly sick. I get fast food because other people like to eat fast food. Well, we're talking about her right now. My issue is sweet treats. Not you. And we both. Okay, I guess we're going to still talk about her. We are both sweet treat vampires. Okay.

1:41:33It's a$40 a month payment. Yeah,$900 total, I believe. And then to the doctor directly, I think it's$172 or something like that. So$900 is owed? $900 is owed. Okay,$900 is the balance,$40 payment. Yes. you feel like you always gotta be the center of attention I am the center of attention

1:41:58I guess technically you are it is your show I'll allow it

1:42:06do you guys enjoy that? now you guys love her it doesn't mean you have to enjoy every quality the insanity is fun

1:42:15Joey enjoys nothing right now Yeah Which is fair I feel like I'm at a funeral We're definitely at a funeral For how you guys are spending money going forward I hope so We're burying McDonald's in the ground

1:42:35Okay we continue USA classic check Is that the end of debt? because there's a lot of paperwork still here

1:42:50well just go in the order I mean it's chaos you guys didn't send statements but I'll deal with it 800 bucks in this USA classic checking who's is this your guys are you guys joint yes on that is the main guy main checking account no that's not our main our main is the bank of America what is this what's the purpose of this That was his like original checking account. What are we using for today though? Mostly bills. Okay, but it's not the main checking account? No. Curious. Okay. For bills, guys, here we go. Hot topic, vending machine, super sale bin. Going in the gas station, getting some bullshit.

1:43:30PayPal, Hulu, PayPal, Affirm. And a Patreon membership of$15. Listen, Hammer Elite on YouTube, 10 bucks a month is much better than that, I guarantee it. Three premium shows posted every single day when you click that join button below. Ay-yi-yi. PayPal, Netflix, Spotify, Boost membership, PayPal, PayPal, Hulu, going in to get its bull... PayPal, what is all this PayPal sh... Makoos Island, another Patreon membership. Great. What's Makoos Island? Makoos Island. Oh, that was the kid thing. Yeah. Okay. Great, look at all the bull... So that's bills. Those are bills. Those are bills. Yeah. That's what keeps our kids happy.

1:44:14Yeah, they're not going to really be happy when they're in their mid-40s trying to survive, but they have to put their life on hold to take care of their parents because their parents never sacrificed when they were younger, and all of a sudden they no longer have retirement, and Social Security is substantially less than it is today. Yeah. That's what you're doing to your kids. Trying to set them up for any kind of future? I don't see it. Are you trying to pay for their college? I don't see it. Are you trying to help them start a business? I don't see it. Are you trying to give them a foot up in this world and give them a generational change?

1:44:38I don't see it. You will be living with them like your parents are living with you. And how is that always? Is that great always? No. No. Okay. But that's what you are doing. That is the choice you are making based on the bullshitting you are doing now. Okay. $3 ,000 in this Bank of America. Food cities and groceries? Groceries. Okay. Well, at least that's groceries. Pet smart, but it's like two bucks. going in and getting some gas station. T-moo? T-moo? Yeah. Who's T-mooing? That was me. Why are you T-mooing? I thought we moved on. I got shoes and clothes for the kids. I think that's another vending machine.

1:45:20Some bull... Vending machine. Some bull... Going in and getting some bull... Sonic. 50 bucks at Sonic. Yeah. Zelling out 200 bucks. Getting some bull... Taquera McDonald's Break the cycle McDonald's get it into Bulls Blue window Market at work Boarding goods Vending machine Papa John's Starbucks Zelling out money Bulls Zelling out 200 selling out$25, going in and getting some bullsh**. Selling out$300, Mr. Car Wash. You live in the desert, I'm okay with it, but rare here and there. The Zelle is between accounts. You guys also have a house filled, a bucket of water, dump it on your car and spray under, okay?

1:46:18Because that's what we're trying to do to avoid getting the sand to everything. Vending machine.

1:46:26Oh, f**k. Mini time machine. How tea. Vending machine. McDonald's Going in and getting some bulls**t Dairy Queen Cash app out$5 Taqueria Taqueria How do you say it? Taqueria Bosen Donuts Burger King Going in and getting some bulls**t Scooter's Coffee Going in and getting some bulls**t Getting some bulls**t McDonald's Getting some bulls**t armless RVs cash out money going in and getting into bulls vending machine guys this is relentless this is insane look at the spending we are doing while we are drowning in debt you are putting your spending over your children's future right now sonic driving zelling out $400 all of the zells are between accounts crazy crazy that spending is insane what does anyone think about what we just saw.

1:47:27Because what the It feels like a lot of waste. It does feel like a lot of waste. But all of the Zells are between accounts. So that's how I get... Oh, come on. The Zells were a vast minority of what I was talking about. But I'm just saying, all of those are... Yeah, how do I feel about what I just went over? I don't care about the Cope Zell. Oh, it's not great. No. It's not great. Like, there's way too much eating out. Like, way too much eating out. It's not good. What do you guys think? What do you think, Joey? Because here's the thing. You want to know what just happened with your wife? I called out the bull.

1:47:55We talked about thousands of dollars the bull there then then she tried to deflect with oh with the zell yeah uh it's easy to focus on the part that's justifiable it's really easy to point at that and say look look look that that part was very important that's fantastic that that part was important that was one month's worth of statements yeah oh yeah that was one that was one month in that in that account how How many of those were Burger King? It's twice a week, three times a week. How many of those were vending machines? Mister, I only go to the vending machine once a day. They were about once a day.

1:48:35But that is a big thing that is happening constantly. Yeah, when dying it at the store is just generally cheaper. What is this Burger King thing? No, it's just like, it's just every meal is a big event over at the drive-thru. Everything's a big drive-thru fiesta. When I feel like splurging at work, I'll have a peanut butter jelly and a brick of ramen. That's how I treat myself if I'm having a particularly rough day at work. And to find out that while I'm over here, I'm down 20 pounds. I've been eating so little, I'm down weight. I haven't been working out. I haven't been trying to do better. I'm not eating right.

1:49:14I'm not eating good. I'm eating less. And while I'm over here literally tightening my belt to find out that two, three times a week, there's a fiesta going on over at Stupid Wendy's. I don't know, man. And I'm just as guilty. I know I am. When you get to mine, you'll see it on there, too. Thoughts on the fiesta? them? Like I said, when the kids want to go eat out, we kind of just do. So it's impossible for you to say no and act like an adult? It's not impossible, but I do know that I had, there's been a lot of guilt. There's been, there's been a lot of guilt lately. And I know it's been harder to say no to the kids and that's not good.

1:50:03I know it's not good, but I know I do it. like I know I do like I can't I really can't justify that because if it was if it was just me I would say no because I don't really like it it doesn't make me feel good and I don't but we get stuff too we do I will eat there I'm not saying I don't eat there I'm just saying like I do it a lot of times for them I think the kids need a big dose of vitamin N yeah Yeah, they do. I think we're going to need to start getting real comfortable with the word no. Yep. And I think that it's unfair to blame all of this on the kids here. It's not all of it on the kids.

1:50:46Like, we do it, too. We're bad about it. It's hard. Cash up, I see$340. Want another water bottle? You're going through them. I appreciate it. I'm staying hydrated. Okay. We've been here for a second and we'll still be here for a second longer. So a rare mid-episode grab. Hey, Bank of America,$83. I mean, cash out there's a few hundred bucks. It looks like he went to McDonald's in June. I don't know. There was probably more, but again, you didn't give me a statement. So$83 in this Bank of America. You said this was the main one, right? Yeah, Bank of America's the main one. It's mostly just money being keep the change moved in.

1:51:35and then we immediately lose it all with the$8 monthly maintenance fee. So I don't really see the point. And then we're transferring money out. We keep the change going in. It's a small little charge or it's a roundup thing, right? But then you pull it out and then you pay a fee to have this account. This makes no sense. You're losing money having this account. There's another fee. Keep the change, keep the change, keep the change. This is, okay, that was nothing. This is pointless. Why even have that? That doesn't make sense to me. Okay. That's not. Listen, I heard there was an upstart. loan somewhere, but I am not seeing it.

1:52:08What loans have we potentially missed? So the only, the other debt I have is$10 ,000 with Upstart. It was a part of the debt relief program, but I'm breaking off from it and just going to try and negotiate myself. Okay. What's the balance of that then? $10 ,000? $10 ,000. Okay. When, when, what, why? That was for an RV. An RV? Yes. When? 20. Start. Yeah, I think it was 2021. Was this a down payment on an RV? It was for the whole RV. Okay. What's this RV situation right now? It's sold. And you still owe 10? Yes. And you're going to negotiate it or are there minimum monthlies on it? I'm going to negotiate it.

1:52:51It went to collections while it was sitting in debt negotiation. So it wasn't really worth it. I'd rather negotiate it myself. What did you sell it for? I think it was 14. What did you buy it for? 14 ,000. I bought it for$25 ,000. Oh. And it was with a - Why did you stop paying? I couldn't afford - This was at the same time where all my stuff kind of went into either debt relief or collections. When we separated, I couldn't afford it anymore.

1:53:24Is there any other debt lines here? I have a - You have three more things in collections. Yeah, I've got Best Buy for$615, Verizon for - Whoa, whoa, whoa, one at a time. Sorry. $650 Best Buy. $615, sorry. $615. Okay, great. $295 to Verizon. Okay, slow down. $295 to Verizon. Okay, we just decided not to pay any of our bills. Okay, what's the next? And then$300 to Internet Company, Mediacom. What do you guys think of all those collections? How could I sit there and criticize a couple hundred bucks? I'm not talking about criticizing, but just like you're hearing it for the first time, what do you think?

1:54:02she's bringing it in if we're trying to combine everything right then we're bringing it in she's bringing it in she's also bringing in the discipline to have addressed some of these things and um at this point i'm not terribly worried about ella yeah we've already discussed a lot of it so i mean i didn't take care of it until this past year i just let it sit well other than debt relief i always make sure to pay that one but um it didn't seem doable until it was doable yeah even though it's small but like you know i told you guys daunting is daunting went from homeless to apartment after the situation so like i should have paid it started paying off right then and there yeah but i blew money it's gonna be on there i knew we blew some money but i didn't realize how much, like, honestly, I can honestly say I didn't realize how much we were blowing.

1:54:55And like, it really does put it into perspective. And while this is terrifying and exhausting, I am really excited to get on a path where it doesn't feel daunting. Cause right now it felt so daunting and I felt really alone. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. This wasn't a, Again, it was about her For fuck's sake, dude Yes, it was about your thoughts on her But it's not about your Why doesn't It doesn't all have to come back to you We're not gonna get out of this together If it's all about you I mean, that's true I'm sorry, I'm not saying that to be a dick This is how you're doing it We really want to fix this This way we can build a more secure And decent life together And it's really unfair to bring Ella in on the disaster that our life has become because I haven't been doing the right thing.

1:55:54And Alice thought she had it handled and she didn't. And I never. We want our lives to be better and we want her to not have reasons to walk away from us. We want to build something worthwhile. What do you feel now on the walking away scale? Everything is achievable, but it does take a lot of work and discipline. And I would like to have a lot more say on, you know, saying no. Yeah, this was a mess, guys. This was an absolute mess. And it's still a mess going forward. $17.60 in this Chase account. Okay. Salvation Army, McDonald's, McDonald's, Magpipe, Whataburger, premium, Amazon Prime selling out$154.

1:56:48This is more bullsh**. Bringing it down from$98 to$17 on our checking account. Oh, good. We've overdrafted this year. I think twice or three times. Why are we overdrafting and going to McDonald's? Overdrafting and McDonald's? F*** off. What are we doing? What kind of bullsh** is this? Yeah, that is now my main account. My wisely was my actual main account through my work. So I switched everything over eventually when I felt like I didn't need that couple days at advance payment. But it is a lot of bull. Except for the Zelle. The Zelle is car payment. The fuck do I do? The fuck do I do? Go for drafting while going to McDonald's.

1:57:32This is insane. Insane. Well, I'm having a monthly service fee of 12 bucks just to have this account because you don't keep enough money in there. Wisely. Yes. Was your main. $2 in there, in the main at the time. Doordashing. She's doordashing something for$27. Matutu's Island. Makutu's Island. IHOP. McDonald's going in the gas station, getting some bullsh**. McDonald's. McDonald's. McDonald's. Amazon Prime Video. Premium. Airbnb. 336. Why are we going on vacation when we're f***** dying? It was the summer vacation. And why are we doing that when we can't afford life? Because I wanted to go. Thoughts?

1:58:20This is who we're bringing in? We all went. No judgment? Sure. But come on. What the f*** are we doing? Why are we doing this, guys? We can't be going on trips if we can't afford to live. You cannot tell me, oh, no, I couldn't pay my credit card payment. If we're spending$336 just for an Airbnb, let alone the travel costs and food and whatever else we're doing there. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that's our groundbreaking thoughts. That's our reflection. We're really going to go somewhere, guys. Pasta Donut, Domino's, and McDonald's.

1:58:58What a joke. The spending is insanity. $3.77 in this crypto account. That's mine. What's our intent here?

1:59:19What's our intent here? I just have it. I got it way back when when we didn't have any debt. I just threw some money in it. And I just let it sit there. It's up to, I think,$5 now. Okay. $5? No,$500. 500, okay. Listen, I mean, I have Bitcoin and that's a good return on investment, you know, sometimes at least historically. Is it averaging 30 % a year or not? I don't know, but your credit cards are. I would just wipe your credit cards. That's one thing we know is going to have a negative return is credit cards. $25 in this, some kind of retirement. Someone's in a target date fund 2055 who has retirement.

2:00:05That's probably me. Okay. We are dramatically behind as a household in retirement. What is this additional? Oh, through savings. So this would be you. $6 ,000 in there, right? So$15 ,000 plus the$6 ,000? Is that correct? Yeah. Or$25 ,000 plus the$6 ,000? Yeah. Yeah, he has two. He has one from his previous and one from his previous. $31 ,000 in retirement. Okay. Yeah. That'll keep us running for several months, it seems. Well, that's all the paperwork. That is all the paperwork. So bathroom? Yeah, we can do a bathroom break.

2:00:43Yeah, keep your chill at that. Okay. Sorry about that. I'm making a nice little pile back here.

2:00:55So I wanted to say, Caleb is very right about something. You are coming into a lot. I'm fine. It's okay. I knew. And you don't have a ring. Oh my god. Are you kidding? You've been dealing with so much and you've been doing it all alone and it's not just us. It's us. And maybe there'll be more. Maybe there'll be more rings. Maybe you'll have a whole handful of rings. Right now I wanted to at least... Yeah?

2:01:34See if this bad boy... Oh, you know, it's Gamble.

2:01:40Almost, almost. You know what? It's fine. I'll take it. Let's do it here for now. There you go. And it's gold, so it's not going... Thank you. It's not going to hurt your little finger. I hate crying. She's been trying to do that for months. Woo! Here's a little box. I know how you like tiny little boxes. I do like boxes. Okay. Okay, well done, I guess. Yes, well done. Now you have one. Now you have one on you. That's very sweet of you to think. My fingers are small. They're very thick. How much did you spend on that? So that should have actually been in the statement. There was 100 and... Okay.

2:02:26I think it was only like 113. It wasn't crazy. Oh, should we make a budget? Absolutely Interesting little detour Okay

2:02:38Does he have to propose too? How does this work? He will when he's ready None of us know the rules man Is that how that works? You propose but then Like legally Nothing happens We'll still do a ceremony eventually With three? Yeah I think that for a long time before marriage was a government-recognized institution, it was people who loved each other expressing that to their friends and family and community in a way that everyone around them recognized. I don't feel like I need the power of the state to recognize that. You don't. I'm just thinking of her protection. Trust me. The last thing I want to do is cause her any more grief.

2:03:26And you're completely right. if but only we lived in a world where individual liberties were recognized the way they ought to be. There's a libertarian. Look, do you want to know? Maybe you'll think this is cute. Maybe you won't. The way I tried to propose to Alice over here was one night I was complaining about taxes, which is not a surprising thing for me to be doing. Nobody likes them. I rolled over and I says, you know, you are as tied to me as anyone has ever been. and our lives are completely intermingled and you could destroy me right now. If you walked out the door, there'd be nothing left.

2:04:03And I says, why don't we just go ahead and get married so we can get that tax break? Because for all intents and purposes, we're already married. Whether we're married or not is irrelevant because we're already there. And let's just get that tax break. And she said that was the least romantic thing she'd ever heard. And I can't think of a more romantic one. I started laughing because I thought he was joking. Okay. Well, our debt minimum monthly payments without mortgage is$2 ,366.17. With the mortgage alone is$3 ,117. It's not including collections. It's not including the student loans. It's not including...

2:04:43There was a USA loan. I don't know if I got a minimum monthly payment. Your finances are a mess. So I'm actually going to put an extra$100 on the debt minimum monthly payment. It was 2 ,466. I don't know. Okay. Utilities, internet, all combined. What's that looking like on a monthly basis? So that is 500 for the electric. Internet is 120.

2:05:19Water, gas. No, it's on a well. Okay, so$620. Cool. Gas, vroom, vroom, drive, drive for all three. I'm about$60 a month. $60. You're what? $160 a month about? I have no idea. About$160. Okay, and you? It's going to be about$160. Okay, so$380. Car insurances across the board. Yeah, it's$200. And then I'm$180.

2:05:56Combined$200? Okay, so$380. And your parents give you$1 ,000 and then you buy all the groceries? Is that the deal? Basically all the groceries. Wow, you're getting f***ed on that deal. Okay. They buy some stuff for themselves that they keep in their room. That they keep in their room. Okay. But I buy most of the stuff. Okay. Then, okay, groceries. Let me think.

2:06:30$1 ,750.

2:06:35TP fund for everyone, everything else is needed. Do you buy their toilet paper and toothbrushes? No, they buy all that stuff. Okay, but we do it for all three of us and the four kids, so...

2:06:50I'm going to say$550. it's not great but$5.50 medical co-pays anything like that yeah I have a pretty big medical amounts per month with everything going on so my co-pays are probably about$250 a month right now okay$250 is there a gym yes how much $60

2:07:23Subscriptions, I'll try to put in 50. Do we have any pets? Yes. Why? How many? Two dogs. Age is health. One's ancient, about 13. Okay. No pet insurance for that. Two. Health? Good health. Pet insurance, 40 bucks. Pet food, how much a month? 60? Yeah, one big bag. Anything else? Oh, phone bills. Oh, yeah. I paid for the year, and so mine's already paid. What is it a year? It's about$300 for the year. Okay. What else besides that? I have helium, so I do$15 a month. That's good. We love that. $35, and this is why you're making progress. You listen to the show. I can tell. Yeah, we have mint, and so we pay for the full year for all three of the phones.

2:08:13So$35 a month. anything else that needs to be in the budget this is the time what else do we have that needs oh we have the two cats necessary to survive budget we have the two cats I almost forgot about the cats yeah ages and health um they're barn cats but they're um are you not getting pet insurance on barn cats no do you not care okay what about food they're probably about$60 it's about the same yeah it's about the same it's probably about$60 Guys, this is not, well, actually, no, no, no. Because the$1 ,000 you get,$9 ,900 comes in. We need$9 ,800 and$1.34. Wow. Okay. Your salary, right? Mm-hmm.

2:09:02Okay. So I just need to pick up registry as well. So$98.66 left. Now, listen, not including the mortgage. Not including the mortgage. So what is that? That brings us to$550 ,974.16 minus$437.911.06. So debt that is not mortgages,$113 ,063.10. With the$98.66, that takes 1 ,145 months to pay off, which is, I believe, the largest we've had on this show. Probably. That is also 95 years. You guys will not be here. This is not possible. I hope you get accepted to school. Take that turn into a higher paying job. If you do not, you are going and working literally any job that exists. I don't care what it is.

2:09:58They could be driving Uber Eats. They could be doing whatever. You need to bring in money. Your parents need to step the fuck up if they're going to live there and watch your kids more. I'm sorry that life has been hard. They need to contribute because right now the house is on fire. You need to go pick up as many as you do. You're doing enough. work-wise. You need to go pick up as many shifts as you can. It sounds like you can, right? Yep. So go and do that. And then we all come together. If we're doing this combined, listen, as far as banks go to combine two in a row, I don't know what three people, but either way, combine, sit down together, even with the anxiety, and we discuss where money went last month, where it was supposed to go, where we f***ed up, and what we need to do to adjust next month.

2:10:38Because this does not have any wiggle room with 95 bucks left. Okay? Or with 98 bucks left. Okay? And listen, the solution might be once you guys change your behavior for three months, go through bankruptcy and do a clean slate. I don't love it. It's expensive. It's stressful. And it's weird once we get three people involved, it won't be a three-person bankruptcy. So bankruptcy might be an option. I don't know. But it's just the dynamic. It's not like three would be involved in the bankruptcy either way. So there's a few solutions. Yes, income. Well, let's build it up. still might be a 10-year payoff plan.

2:11:12Maybe we do bankruptcy, but before you do either, or while you're doing either, you need to prove you change your behavior and we can budget as an household, especially with this curious dynamic. That's what I'd recommend. I'm going to give them their Hammer Financial Score. Let's do that calculation. But first, make sure you click that Join button. Join Hammer Elite for three premium shows every single day, Monday through Friday, and join the post show for this episode. An extra 20 minutes of this episode where something crazy always happens and we'll find out. Hammer Financial Score. For the household, well, we overspent.

2:11:42Zero out of 10. Debt, we have collections. Zero out of 10. Emergency fund, we had a little bit in checking account, but nothing in savings. But for the few thousand sitting in that checking account, I'll at least give you one out of 10 to be generous. Retirement, dramatically behind. What was it? Total 30? About 35, you said. 35, and we're like mid-30s on average with the household. Very behind. I'm going to say two out of 10. Real estate, barely in equity position in a house that needs massive updating anyway. And a market that is kind of in the middle of nowhere. It's not thrilling. If you sold it today, you wouldn't make much money.

2:12:11But at least you have an asset that will theoretically go up in price. That at least gets you a 5 out of 10 in the interest rate. It's not disgusting.

2:12:21It's going to be a Hammer Financial Score just barely rounded up to a 2 out of 10. Click that join button. Join us in Hammer and Lee. And don't forget to download the DollarWise budgeting app and get your free trial today. We'll see you in the post show. There's another debt. So we have friend debt. and now we have family debt. What is the family debt? Who even owe it how much? It's my uncle. How much do we owe to your uncle? Uh, it's... Exclusive members' content. Click the link in the description or pinned comment below and watch thousands of hours of extra and uncensored content.