Financial Audit's Most Toxic Couple

24:23It was 10 years ago? Time don't matter. Time don't matter. It's long time. We're just liking things. Wait, huh? Yeah, 10 years ago. I don't think what either of you did is that big of a deal, dude. I don't either. But why are you, but no, no, no. What is a big deal is both of you crash out about it. Yeah. It's insane how you treat each other and the insecurities you guys have. What the f***? You're making each other's problems like crazy. I really am not that insecure with him. What? No, I really not. I really not. It's because he's always like, you're f***ing cheating. You can't be with men. You can't work out of jail.

24:54You can't do this. See, why are you saying that? That's crazy. Because she touched someone's arm 10 years ago. You're accusing her of being a cheater. She can't have jobs? I didn't have a problem with jobs. I had a problem with the job. No, he has a problem with the job. because what's the job job was working at a jail with a bunch of dudes who didn't want to do nothing but they literally had a running bed on who was going to crack her first here's a question for the gooners out there why do most of the adult toys out there feel like a power tool with a sleeve on it one motor one flat buzz and the same speed from start to well finish lilo is today's sponsor and they're a swedish company that's been making high-end pleasure products since 2003 and they just relaunched the F2S with double the motors.

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27:48pdsdebt.com slash hammer. It's still up to her to get cracked or not, though. She's telling me, oh, these are just my friends. They're so nice to me. Da, da, da, da, da. Oh, the inmates? No, the. She f***ed with inmates. No, I'm not f***ing. Friends with inmates. inmates get out of jail. Wait, who has the list? The deputies or the inmates? The deputies. Yeah, deputies. That's crazy. But why does she have inmates? I wouldn't want you working there either. I did not add any inmates on my Facebook. That is illegal. I wouldn't want you working there either if all your coworkers were there. I was making the most money there.

28:22Yeah, but it was like everyone you worked with was taking a bet on when they could fuck you. And nobody, I did not know that was going on. Yes, you did. You just admitted that to me. Shut. How did we find out about it then if you didn't know? Because I posted something on Facebook talking about this guy keeps trying to add me on Facebook and how it's embarrassing that he keeps resending his friend requests. And then these girls that I worked with were like, hey, by the way, they definitely had a bet going on on who could crack first. And that's when I was like, what the fuck? Yeah, then she told me that she already knew that because I don't know if you told me that to try to hurt my feelings because it was arguing.

28:55But you told me you already knew that. I didn't know about the bet. It's in my text that you already knew that. I didn't say I already. And you said you enjoyed the attention. No, I, okay, let me pause there. I said I knew there were men at that jail who liked me in that way. And as a woman who's very self-conscious and low self-esteem, yeah, a little bit of attention. Yes. So a little bit of attention is nice, a little bit. I'm not out there like, oh my God. No, it's nice. No, it's fine. I think attention's good. I think a bat crack, a bat crack is kind of a crack bat. Yeah. That's kind of crazy.

29:33That is crazy. Yes, it's good to get attention. And I also don't know why they chose the fat one to be the crack bat. I'm not that fat. No, you're obese, but. Not super obese. No, not morbidly. No, that's good. It's just exercising. No, that's good. I'm not like saying that in terms of like hurt your feelings. But like let's just, I would say it to a man. We should say it to a woman too. You're obese. I'm obese. Okay, very good. Equality. But I'm not like beating you over the head with it. But that's only one Facebook. She's got like six Facebooks. Okay, I don't have six Facebooks. I have two other Facebooks.

30:05Why do you have six Facebooks? I literally do not have six. Six messengers, four TikToks. I don't even know how many Snapchats. I have one main Facebook. She claims she don't have Instagram, but she literally has Instagram on her phone. We have so many different accounts. My Instagram is from my high school. Literally, I have not posted anything. I don't even care about the single Instagram. Multiple Snapchats is freaky. I do not have multiple Snapchats. Why do you say that then? I don't know if it's true or false, but she has many of everything. So why wouldn't, why don't I? I don't have many of everything.

30:32So you're just accusing Basil Slick. Yes. I have two other Facebooks. One. Why? One I made because when we were going through issues with somebody, I was blocked on my personal Facebook. So I was using. Oh, you're a freak. She's stalker. Big time. But we won the case, didn't we? Case? Yes. Case? Yes. I can't go into it, but there was. Okay. And I was going onto this person's page and I was getting information from that false Facebook. And yes, I still have it. And then I tried to change my email on my now Facebook. And apparently I made a Facebook back in middle school. And what about the multiple TikToks?

31:08Like that is weird. Multiple TikToks, that's accidental. Because every time I've been logged out of TikTok. Multiple Facebook, multiple TikToks, maybe multiple Snapchats. No multiple Snapchats. Listen, I swapped from my iPhone to my Android. And I'm like, damn, I got to get back on my TikTok. I go to log in on my TikTok and it brings up some shit she done made. So I'm like, damn, what information is even on my TikTok? My email and my phone number are tied to two different fake TikToks that she's made. I can't even get my old TikTok. And when she leaves the house or does all this shit or whatever she's doing, she cuts off her Life 360.

31:42So I just can't see where she's going. Oh yeah, because I'm mad. Okay, now that, see, that does get a bit sketchy. I'm sorry. That's spiteful. Like, listen, I was fully on your side for his, he was being incredibly insecure. And I think I'm probably still on your side, but it's getting a little more weird. She's creating insecurity. Turning off Life360 when you leave. Last time that happened, that episode's not out yet, probably before you guys. But every time she did, she was getting railed. That's what I'm saying. Well, I'm not. I'm not supposed to be confident in what you're doing. I'm turning my location off.

32:12Why are you turning it off? So he does not follow me. I'm not going to follow her. I've been at home with kids. And also, I do want him to be mad. I've been at home with a three-year-old. Whenever he pisses me off enough to make me leave the house, I'm in the mode of, okay, now I'm going to hurt you because you hurt me and you're not listening to me. So I turn my Life360 off, so that way he is at home thinking, oh, whatever shit. Why are you playing games? In what healthy marriage is games going to work? It's not. It's not going to work. You think he's going to follow you? Yes. He just thought there's kids.

32:43I'm going to wake up my three-year-old that's dead asleep, dress him, put him in a corset, and then follow her. Like, what? So it was always in the middle of the night? No. Last time I left, it was in the middle of the day, and I literally was texting him the whole fucking time. No, last time you left, it was in the middle of the night, and you wound up at damn, like, Jack-in-the-Box parking lot. That's why. I was going to sleep. Yeah, she came. No, I was sleeping. She said, I'm not coming home. I'm going to sleep in the box? Yes, I went to the parking lot. It's a well-lit parking lot with a lot of, like, police traffic.

33:13Who the fuck does this? Because I didn't want to be home. Her ass was eating Jack in the Box and telling me she wasn't coming home. They should come home with a shit ton of Jack in the Box. On everyone's favorite Hammer Elite show, Fat and Fatter, we did Jack in the Box. And it is honestly the best restaurant I've ever had in the league. Yeah, it's for Stone's for sure. They got a lot of good shit. But anyways. So I get that. Don't get to sleeping in the Jack in the Box. Nobody does that. It wasn't in the Jack in the Box parking lot. It was next to it. That's so weird. Jack in the Box. People get a motel.

33:45Hold on. I got a picture. You have friends, you said. No, I don't really have friends. Then how are your friends that don't exist telling you that he's abusive? Because I have them on like Snapchat. Because we had a fight about a chicken coop, and that's the one that she— What? What are we talking about? We live in the country. What, two weeks ago, the recent fight? Yeah, this is the big fight. The big fight was the chicken coop. Yeah, so this is one— Okay, yeah, so let's get back to the fight. Oh, you guys are all over the place. What? What chicken coop situation? She feels like it's the most serious because one time only, in 10 years I left and went to my mom's house that was a huge mistake on my part apparently.

34:22Why? What happened? I don't know she can talk to her friends about me but I can't go talk to my mom You can't go to his mom's house? My mom was a mile down the road. It's not like I just took off I go to my mom's you've already been to my mom's by that point. Yeah she'd already been to my mom was afraid literally afraid because she told her I can't leave dinner in the car I've got a gun in the car my mom was literally scared that she would She would use a gun on me. On who? Wait, what was happening? Guys, what the f***? What happened? That's what I'm saying. That's what I was trying to think of earlier.

34:51Why were we fighting? Yeah, if you would shut the f*** up and let me talk. Okay, so we got into a fight. This motherf***er went to the store and bought me chickens to make up from the fight. We don't have a f***ing chicken coop. We don't have any chicken food. Was it something she was asking for? For years. Oh, okay. So it was at least something. It wasn't f***ing random. It was pretty f***ing random. It may have been a random time to buy it, but the purchase subject wasn't random. So I go inside, I go to sleep, whatever. We wake up the next morning, and stuff happened, and then we went to the bathroom.

35:26Hold on, what happened? He started to have sex with me, and I kept telling him, no, no, no, no. This is some bullshit. Literally. This is the biggest bunch of bullshit you have ever heard this year, I swear to God. I. You want to? What? Go ahead. What? Go ahead and I will follow. Go ahead. So I launched this man off of me multiple times. He finishes whatever he's doing. And he's like, wait, were you even into that? And I was like, fuck you. No, I wasn't. I was telling you no the whole time. She told my mom I was. Yeah, I sure did. I sure did. My friend, that is. Consensual non-consent is her favorite thing.

36:03No, it's not my favorite. We didn't just jump straight in. I didn't jump straight into it. But I never said, hey, let's have some C &C. Basically did. No, I didn't. I didn't say anything but no. I don't want to have sex. That's not how it started. It started with us cuddling literally for like 20 minutes, and you kept bouncing your ass off of me. No, I wasn't. Does that not always turn into sex when you're cuddling? I literally woke up pissed off at you. Why would I do that? But consent can be removed at any time, my friend. But CNC complicates things. It's hard to read. In CNC is a safe word typically.

36:39Yes. Did not have a safe word. Or plan it. No. Do you have to plan plan? That's relationship to relationship. It depends. What did you guys discuss and agree as a whole? Nothing. There was no discussion. It was just. Okay, so that is confusing. We're spur of the moment. I would have probably clarified personally. I mean, I'm literally kicking this man in the chest. Kicking him off of me and telling him no. That's when I realized. I agree. That's when I realized. Well, she said you finished. Yeah, but that's when I realized. After. After. Sure, he finished, and then I get up, and I'm going to the bathroom, and he said, oh, were you even into that?

37:13Literally, this 10 years has happened one time. That's how I know I'm not a rapist. It's weird that you had to ask that, because CNC, it's like you know they're into that, because there's discussion. I mean, usually— We've never actually played out a CNC. Yes, we have. Then what made you get so— Nine times out of 10, it's aggressive. So, I mean, it was basically the same but different. So that happened. What made you do that so different that morning? Another thing. Every time that we've gone to sleep mad, we literally wake up in a good mood, fine, ready to start the day. Yeah. Okay? So that's all I'm thinking is the same damn thing.

37:47I literally get up, take care of the dogs, come back, lay, cuddle up next to her, and it's like 10 minutes of ass bouncing. No, I never was. Which is implied consent, which despite where Reddit and TikTok and non-frontal load developed think is an actual form of consent. However, consent can be removed at any time. I just didn't realize it. Well, I'm sorry. Kicking and saying no, I don't want to is removal. And CNC, like you said, nothing was established. So CNC is great, but there's clear things that need to be established first. If it's always CNC, free use CNC, that's where there's like a safe word.

38:25And that's where we should evolve. You didn't have that because you guys also didn't establish that you were in free use CNC. It wasn't CNC any time. We weren't professionals at it. We just thought we would. So now we know. Now I know. Now you know. I mean, it is complicated. The reality is you technically did beep her. But for her to 10 years, one incident, and then her to go to my mom's house and literally scream at the top of her lungs in a neighborhood that I've beeped her. To be very clear, so it was done. It's wild. It finished. Well, he finished. And you immediately got in the car and drove to his mom's?

38:58No, I got in the shower. And he decided to come in there while I was taking a shower. and he's like, you know, what's wrong? And I'm like, I'm still pissed because of everything that happened last night. Like I just injured myself. I just moved this big ass fence, tried to, and you as a man stood there and watched me. You let me do it. This episode is brought to you by Google Chrome. You think you know a browser, but Gemini and Chrome, that's new. It can help you with practically anything on the web, like restoring a vintage motorcycle from a 50 page restoration block, or finally break down that long article you've had open for weeks.

39:35Gemini and Chrome is here for it. Ready to make anything online make sense? There's no place like Chrome. Check responses set up required compatibility and availability varies 18 plus. I was letting you finish getting whatever the... Because I said, as a man, you sat there and let me struggle and not help me because you were in a petty ass mood about... Because I didn't you bring the shed down. Yeah, I mean, it's not the greatest. It's not as important as what happened that morning, but go on. So, and then I did bring up the whole and we just got we got to argue in and then I mean, you did just crazy.

40:13I mean, that is the actual word but like if who goes 30 years it just becomes all of a sudden with their wife they've been together for 10 years. Because the wife can say no. Yeah, but I didn't know. I know. It's more complicated than Reddit and Twitter will allow it to be and TikTok it is. that is technically what happened if we're black and white in it. Yes, it's more complicated. And it's, I mean, again, if you guys like moved beyond it and you had like a corrective talk afterwards, like, yo, that like, what the f***? Yeah, and that's what it was. And you guys moved beyond it, then that's okay.

40:48You guys can do that. But it is technically still something that happened. But it should, I mean, I shouldn't carry that label for the rest of my life. Probably not if you guys have like moved beyond it, right? No, I agree. I think we have. But let's also acknowledge the fact that that is actually what happened, probably. And in that moment, that's how I feel. And yes, complicated. More complicated than the black and white that the internet will allow it to be. But you did not want it, correct? Correct. You were kicking him off. Correct. And he kept going. He kept going. Literally launched the motherfucker into the bed.

41:21But you guys are your relationship. If you guys have established that, okay, it was complicated. I didn't know. We've had CNC discussions and, you know, we failed at obviously setting boundaries there. Okay, let's move beyond it and here's real rules. Okay? Yeah. You guys do that? Then no, we're not just going to sit here and just keep beating you for the rest of your life. Yeah. I mean, if it wouldn't end in a way. But if she wants to, she can. Say hi, can you tell? Say hi, can you tell? I start talking, she start talking? Anyway, so I was in the shower and he was like, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

41:49And then I was telling him, A, B, and C, this is why I'm mad at you. This is why I'm mad this morning. And you as a man stood there, let me do all this. You didn't help me. I think that's wrong on your part. And then he got mad. And that makes me almost think maybe, I mean, I'm on the side that it probably was. Damn, I thought we were moving best. But like, was it if the thing she's even more upset about is the fact that you didn't help her move something? That's a very good point. Very good point. No, I also. I don't know. Be the priority. I'm going to fence it and not make a conclusion. So I literally just said that while I was in the shower, we were talking about the sexual thing.

42:27And then I was also telling him, like, this is why I'm mad at you. He got mad. He said, well, you're useless. I got mad at that, and I slapped him. Very nice. And then he pushed me. Well, you physical art. Yes, I did start it. You started it. I started it. Like, was this like a. . . Yeah, it was. . . That's crazy. You're abusive. That's on our labels. I mean. . . You're an assaulter. You're an abuser. You're abusive. Listen, he called me useless, and that, like, pissed me off. You shouldn't be a person working in a prison if you, like, can't control yourself like that. Well, I don't have interactions with inmates like that.

43:05Okay, then. Okay, it's better, then. Yeah. Okay, go on. Go on until you hit him. And then he pushed me. I pushed him back, and then he pushed me up against the wall. And to get away from the situation, I bit him on the chin, apparently, so hard. What, is he pinning you? Yes. I'm trying to control her. Like, stop. No, I kind of understand what you're doing, but she reacted that way because she felt pinned. Yeah. So how come every time I try to leave the bathroom, you throw shit at me? Like, every time I try to walk away twice, try to walk away, I get shit thrown at me. That's why I turn around.

43:39You wouldn't even care as much about all this if you guys didn't say there was a kid. There was. Once our son walked in, that's. Was a kid? Yes, there was a kid. He's dead? No, he's alive. No, he's dead. Oh, I see what you're saying. He's doing well. There is a kid. Oh, okay. Yeah. One kid. We f*** up with that, but. Well, there's one kid. Two kids, one wasn't home. No, one was home. She literally started screaming. No, any of you guys' relationship, how many kids are there? Two. Two. Okay, what are the ages? Three and 12. Okay, thank you. Twelve-year-old's not hers. It is, but it's not. No, I understand.

44:09I've raised her since he was two. More low and not all around town. I get it. Yeah, more. It is what it is. Okay, so, okay, you got away after biting his chin, I guess. And then our son came in and I literally just had the biggest epiphany where I was like, what the are we doing? Yeah, you guys are saying, do you not hear this conversation so far of how crazy your guys' relationship is? So I was like, get away from me. You know, we got done. I gathered up my stuff. I gathered up our son. I went to his mom's house. Like leaving. Yeah, like leaving. No, she was going to tell on me. No, I wasn't.

44:40I was trying to leave. It was such an escalated situation that I knew the best result would be one of us leaving. So I left. You went to his mom's house? I went to his mom's house. As soon as I got to his mom's house, his mom's on the phone with him. I am still in like a panic mode. Like I'm still high anxiety, like freaking the out. I get up there and I'm telling her like, are you on the phone with him? And she's like, yeah, he already told me everything that happened. And I'm like, well, did he tell you that he me? And then she's like, I don't know, baby. I don't know what to do. And I was like, it's fine.

45:15I'm leaving. It is hard to put someone in that position. Yeah, in the middle of like nothing. Like she had no idea what was going on. I literally called her. I'm like, yeah, I think me and Caitlin about to get a divorce. And for what it's worth, based on every conversation I've had on the show where people over sensationalize anything, I actively take the step of not believing all women. It's really sad, actually, but it's really pathetic what people have done since Me Too. Where I really want to be on the side, Luckily, I am 100 % on your side because at least you guys agree on it. But the thing is, when I ever get the full picture, it's just like someone like grazed against someone's hand and they got like crazy these days.

45:51That's why earlier I was saying whenever I. So I'm just saying that as like it's fair that your mom was like kind of like, whoa, okay, I don't know. Yeah. But in my mind at that time, I was like, there's no help for me here. So my mind went, I have no help. if I were to leave this situation today, I have. Yeah, it's scary. No friends, no family. Yes, you're a loser.

46:16You're a good girl. I know. This is a hard moment. I know. Good girl's crazy.

46:23Hold on. It's difficult. So anyways, I was like, I literally have nowhere. I don't have friends. I don't have family. So I don't know. But you have Caleb Hammer. I do have Caleb Hammer. And you could have come to the studio and we would have laid out for you a double air mattress. Hell yeah. The Ashley brand. Anyway, so I was like, wow, I don't have anybody. I don't have friends. I don't have a mom. So I f***ed off the deep end and deleted. I went from 1 ,500 Facebook friends to now I have 528. Okay. Quick question in all that. I was like feeling sad, sympathetic with you. No, no, no, no, no. I had my mom.

47:06What is with the rural Americans and their obsession with Facebook? How after? Okay. I mean, let's be clear. Got first instinct to delete all my friends on Facebook. Like what is with you people in Facebook? Like why is Facebook like, what are you? It's because I had my mom, I had my family on my Facebook. Okay. But there's so many things to do before deleting friends. Like go to a hotel, a motel. Well, I'm broke. Yeah, but I mean, are you guys joint? Like you said, everything's in a time. You could have taken, you could have spent money. Okay, okay, so what happened then at the end of that thing?

47:39Is that when you printed the papers? Yeah, yeah. Okay, well, I think fair. Took us 45 minutes to get. Now I understand why you opened, like before we filmed with that, because it's crazy how much context actually delivers something. You wonder why we spend so much time on getting to know people? Context. It actually does matter, even if it's Springer. Anyway, so yeah. I deleted everybody, gave him the papers. I said, listen. Do you forgive him for what happened? No. But we. Oh, shit. Because I was going to say, don't cause him any real life consequences because I was expecting her to say yes. Never mind.

48:15No, no, I don't. And he knows that I don't. I don't agree with anything. Well, hold on. How can you guys? I don't agree with any of it. I don't agree with it. But you want to be together? I do want to be together because. So when you said, here's the papers, get your shit together. What can he do for you to not divorce at this point? So I told him since the very beginning of our relationship, I've been telling him you need to go to a doctor. You need to get on medicine. You have anger issues. You've got anxiety issues. Well, you hit first as well, though. Yes. I mean, like, you're abusive. I have my issues, but he can attest I have gone through leaps and bounds to fix my shit.

48:56Have you guys been to therapy together? Yeah. Yeah, once for one visit. He said he didn't like her. She gave me a bunch of damn print-offs. Like, what am I supposed to do with a print-off? I mean, maybe. I don't know. Okay, here's the thing. I'm blessed enough to be able to offer this now because it is hard to offer therapy and therapists. And this isn't like a sponsor or partnership. I have my own personal therapist that has helped me through with things. And now that we're getting kind of to the end of our process, you know, he and I started having a conversation. I was like, I wish you could help people like my guests.

49:26He's like, you know what? Let's do it. So I'm going to pay for you guys to go to my own personal therapist. We keep him anonymous. We call him Dr. D on the show. He's really good. He's not an enablement therapist, which I swear like 70 % of them are these days. He'll tell you to shut the f*** up and he'll kick your ass verbally, okay? If you guys suck. So clearly you guys need f***ing help. But do you want to stay together after all this? Yes, because literally he's my best friend. He's been there for me through a lot of hard s***. But I've never had a friend. Has he not been some of that hard shit though?

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52:28All right, let's get back to the episode. Then I hope we can get you guys together. Let's get into these finances, and I have a feeling we're going to learn a lot more about your guys' floor as we go on. I just need to start getting through the stack. Shit. What do you guys think your household financial score is today? Zero to 10, zero being the best, or zero being the worst, 10 being the best. I got a 2.8. I would say zero. All right. If you want to figure out your score, sounds like he did, go to CalebHammer.com, take the assessment. It's free. Figure out where you stand in detailed categories.

52:55Check it out, CalebHammer.com. And if you don't want to be like a guest who ends up on the show, make sure to download the Dialowise budgeting app. It is the best budgeting app for the average American. It is so good. Check out a free trial. See if it works for you. Most people take the annual version after that because it saves nearly 50 % on your money and you get the physical version of my 30-day meal plan signed by me, mailed directly to you, and the digital version of the cookbook as well, guys. Check that out, dollawise.com, or just download the app or go to all those links in the description below.

53:23Okay. His mom's credit card. Okay. Why are we caring about... Why is this here? What am I doing with this? His mom's credit card. Not really much to do with it other than I... What does this have to do? I don't feel like... That's what I'm saying about her income. It's not right because we don't have enough money to pay everything. So my mom gives me her card and I use it for gas and groceries. You're 30 years old. Your mother gives you your credit card to get gas and groceries? I mean, we went from making six figures to nothing because she's in school. Okay, what was the six-figure situation?

54:00What were you making? We were great. I was making... Probably another 60. So we was probably like 120. Okay, and we stopped that to go pursue nursing? Yeah, so I could further... She was already a nurse, but advanced. Well, the thing is, once she's done with her nursing school, she actually works and you guys are together. You guys are going to make maybe even upward of together 200. Yeah, and I'm going to nursing school too, so. Really? You're going to be a nurse? Yes. You can't see it? Isn't that crazy? I told him he would do great in corrections. Yeah, maybe. I don't know. Do you want me to get that wrong?

54:30It's not in a women's prison. They don't have a crack bet on me. I mean. Shit, you don't want to be in a women's prison. They'll get you. He'll them. No, they will him. That's crazy. Oh, okay. Crazy. I don't know why we're beating a dead horse about me being a. I mean, I've been a drug dealer. I've been this. I've been that, but I ain't been no. This isn't a$600 balance. This says$600 a month. What does this mean? What is like this mom's credit card? What do I put? That's most of our groceries and most of my gas. Yeah, but like what's the balance? What do you owe her? I don't owe her nothing. She said I don't owe her nothing.

55:06Oh, come on. And she does$600 on her own credit card a month and you give her nothing for it? She just pays for all this? No, he pays. But right now, yeah. I'll get her back. But how much? We don't know. And just, we don't count amounts. Like, I'm going to get her back. She got me. Get her back in what way? Probably like gifts or something. What the fuck are we doing? So what do I put down for this? I don't know. It's not a debt. It's just what I'm having to borrow. But$600 a month. She does that. You don't give it to her. Actually, it's$1 ,200 a month. What? She does. She pays for our son's daycare.

55:36$1 ,200? We can't afford it. We can't afford it. It's not$1 ,200. It's$600 plus$600. is$1 ,200. A month? See, this is where I'm the only one that takes on the finances and I get Why? Why aren't you participating? Because I Because what? Look how frustrated he's getting. Anytime we talk about finances he gets frustrated and I don't understand what the hell's going on. I'm just talking. Okay, tell me, how do we do the finances in this house? Guys, give me some insight. Because clearly, it's a mess. Obviously, you're not a part of it, but just like what have we tried to do? What's happening? Well, he, I'm sorry, he used to do it all the time.

56:16He's kind of stopped being as responsible. So you're kind of seeing like a role switch with us where I'm kind of taking over the finances more. So you're getting in. I'm getting it. Like I've got to excel. And he's allowing this? Yeah. Yeah. Okay, so what's the issue? What are you talking about then? I wanted help the whole time. Why wasn't she? Because she just didn't know. I mean, she grew up where she didn't have to worry about finances or money. so like it stressed her out. Yeah, it intimidated me. So I just let her be, you know, like, all right, whatever. But I'm not also, I'm not going out and spending a bunch of money.

56:48Yeah, no, no, no, she don't spend money. If he's like, we don't have money. So you're the spender? Yes. What do you spend? Why? I don't know, coping, I guess. Are you holding him accountable? What's happening? What are the conversations around the spending? I see bills are coming up. I can't see his bills, but like my debit cards. But you guys said you're combined. We are combined. How can you not see his stuff then? That doesn't make any sense. Because the way the app is set up, I only have my stuff, and then he has his stuff. Can you see her stuff? No. We can't see each other's credit cards, obviously, because we're not joining credit cards.

57:17But isn't that managing for spending, though? How can we budget if we don't know where our spending's going, guys? No, everything, join you on the checking account. Just checking, but you're not seeing where the spending is, what the categories are. Well, I know what my categories are, but I don't know what hers are. She don't ever leave the house. Isn't the point that— Yeah, that's another thing. I never leave the house. isn't the point for us budgeting together is knowing where the money is going. If she can't see it, how do we know? Yeah, I get that part. It's true. But I mean, what is she going to look at?

57:50That guy bought gas? Maybe. She wouldn't know. I wouldn't know. She wouldn't care. I could be like, hey, why did you go to Walmart and spend$50 four days in a row? Because I'm picking up groceries on the way home that I'm going to cook when I get there. And I grab a monster truck if they got a new one. I literally have no idea what his credit card amounts are. I know that my credit cards, I have one that got a little high, and I was like freaking out because I was like, oh my. This episode is brought to you by Google Chrome. You think you know a browser, but Gemini and Chrome, that's new. It can help you with practically anything on the web, like restoring a vintage motorcycle from a 50-page restoration block, or finally break down that long article you've had open for weeks.

58:33Gemini and Chrome is here for it. Ready to make anything online make sense? There's no place like Chrome. Check responses set up required compatibility and availability varies 18+. God, I've got student loans. I've got credit cards. I'm not going to be able to do this. And he's like, 11 ,000? Those are rookie numbers. I didn't say rookie numbers. He said those are rookie numbers. I said that ain't shit on mine that we're literally living off of. So don't stress about it. It's fine. We have to do what we have to do in this moment until we graduate. What the f*** are you talking about? So I have an Excel sheet.

59:07For me, it has all my money. It's not going to work just doing half. Exactly. And she just made it like two weeks ago. No, I made it like over a month. She looks like she's been on financial top of the world for the last year, and it's not like that. No, I have not. But I have recently been more serious about it. Yes, she has recently, very recently. Yeah, listen, nothing that anyone does when they know they're coming on financial. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I started doing all that before he applied. When did you guys apply? Like not even a month ago. He said you were starting to do this two weeks ago.

59:39She might have been a day in advance. She didn't know, but she did start. She started before. Then it doesn't really count to me. Okay, so the mom thing, do I put that anywhere? What do I do with that? It's just more of like a I feel f***ed up for having to do that. You should to be confirmed. She spends$1 ,200. $1 ,200. You do nothing. In relation to that. No, he does nothing. In relation to that. He has. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. For daycare, I buy. She does that. I buy like a quarter of the groceries, a quarter of my gas, and she buys like three. No, no, no. But of the$1 ,200, you don't give her any pennies towards that.

1:00:10It's just her. I ain't got nothing to give. I got to borrow. How am I going to give you? Oh, my gosh. Okay. You're not understanding my question. I'm just trying to notate how much I'm putting down for, like, minimum monthly payments and shit. No, no, no. Just minimums. She spends the$1 ,200 and you give nothing back. Correct? So just put, yeah, nothing. Thank you. So I'm just going to cross it out for f***ing because it doesn't even matter because when we get to your Navy Federal, well, you took it from$9 ,000 to$21 ,062.76 because you purchased$11 ,681 and only made the minimum monthly payment anyway.

1:00:40So what the f*** are we doing? I don't know. The minimum now is$429.15. $220 of interest accrue. What the f***? This takes 32 years to pay off. That's why we don't have money whenever I work my ass off. Your kids will be approaching their 40s and 50s. That's where you'll be in life. Because all you do is the minimum. It's basically maxed out. What the f*** did you do? I lived off of it. We had to live off of it because there was not enough money. My check is consistent. Do you push her to work more? I try not to. I try not to. You might have to. Well, I feel bad. He does. Because I want her to do good at school.

1:01:15I want her to have her time. But you have to pay for the bills. I'm sorry. He does. And I do. I go when money's getting low and he's like, hey, we're going to. Two grand a month is not it. That's not her salary. This was$11 ,681. Whatever you got for her salary, like that's not it. Like it's literally what I said. Like 600 is the average. No, it's not. Because they're going to be a month with no money. Literally, we'll go through and work shifts left and right, back to back, so that way we have a bunch of money. And then he'll tell me while I'm working, like, stop picking up so many shifts. Stop working so much.

1:01:48Why would you say this? Because she's a goddamn hyper-focused, whatever the hell. Anyways, she won't work for like three weeks, and then she'll just be like, okay, I'm going to work Monday through Friday and not give myself any time to do schoolwork. I'm like, that's so stupid. I usually do that after I take my big test. Then I'll crank out shifts. And then not do anything for a month and a half. So then the last few weeks that I have to study, I have time to sit home and study. But doing it that way. Oh, my gosh. How much insight did you have into him spending all this money on this credit card?

1:02:18We're living off of it. How do you don't know? Like, you know we ain't got no money. Where do you think shit's coming from? Well, I didn't know that's where it was coming from. What's Royal King Farm Supply? Oh, that's chicken shit. Okay, well, you spent$202 on chicken shit. That's what I'm saying. Well, I mean, I bought the chickens, but it's expensive. I wish I had. I mean, chickens, this sounds nice. I'd love that, but I mean, this is expensive for people who can't even afford to take care of themselves and their kids. Should we have chickens right now? I don't think that makes sense. Our kids definitely get.

1:02:45Via credit cards. You can't afford to. You're not doing it. And then you add chickens sometimes. Maybe we get rid of the chickens for now. The chickens are gone. Chickens are. We have two turkeys. We do have two turkeys. They died? You didn't give them away? They disappeared. No, they disappeared. All of them disappeared? Yes, literally all of them. Except for two turkeys. And they act like dogs. Hey, time for the turkeys to go? Thanksgiving? Yes, Thanksgiving. They will be Thanksgiving turkeys. I mean, is that not like... I guess it makes sense. Is that budget friendly? I've been a small town in City Boy.

1:03:13I've never been a rural boy. So I guess it makes sense. Yeah. You keep fad and mump. Oh, yeah. And they're fad. I mean, I just don't like how you refer to them as dogs. And now you're going to eat them. They act like, well, yeah, it's kind of f***ing. They're like pets, right? Yeah, they're pretty cool. Like, if I go outside and I whistle our female turkey, she'll call back to me. That's pretty cool. You're going to kill her? Yes. Well, she's a meat. It's a mercy kill. Yeah. She's a meat bird. So if they get too old, they start having like really bad life complications. Like game wall because she's so heavy.

1:03:42Yeah. So you got her for this purpose? I didn't know what she was when I bought her. I just bought it. She was part of the purchase of. I thought it was a dope ass white turkey. Yeah. That was part of the purchase of, oh, we just got in a fight. Here's some chickens. So they're nice to you guys? Yeah, they're really nice. They're cool shit. I could never be a farmer. I don't want to eat that shit, but I couldn't raise then kill. I'm a pussy. That'd be tough. I'll probably just drop them off somewhere. Take them to the Amish. We live around a bunch of Mennonites. Well, you definitely stopped in the gas station and got some energy drinks and bullshit.

1:04:14Come on. $8. What are you doing? I see the gas that you got before that, so it wasn't that. What are you doing? What you doing? Every morning, I take our three. I've worked five days a week. So five days a week, I take our three-year-old to daycare, and we stop at the store. and I get two coffees. What the fuck are you doing? He gets a juice. What the fuck are you doing? And a corn dog. Why is a corn dog? How fat is this kid? He's not fat. He's a beast. He's an animal. He's got to eat. Gosh dang. He's like a damn dumpster. He will be fat. All he does is run around outside. Them turkeys, all they do is chase them turkeys.

1:04:53Great. I'm glad we're killing them. I mean, he's a beast. You can't afford them. You probably should. Maybe the kid too.

1:05:02Okay. You can't afford that. I know, but I love it. Make your coffee at home. I don't either. Do Gamer Supps if you need your energy drinks. Someone was sipping them on, so I don't know where I went. Sorry. So maybe you need Gamer Supps. It's 40 cents a serving. Get liquid assets especially. That's our flavor, but you can get whatever flavor you want. Free samples. Link in the description below only with code Caleb and then get Gamer Supps with a 10 % discount making a 40 cents a serving instead of these multiple energy drinks. So. What does it taste like? That's raspberry apple, but there's like a thousand other flavors.

1:05:32It's really good. We, well, dude, we compared it to like every flavor and this was everyone's voted favorite. The raspberry apple? It's fucking delicious. Did you try to order a sweet tea yesterday? All right, shut the fuck up. I don't give a shit about what you're doing outside of here. Shut up. Okay. the thing is everything that you're doing with him every day that is costing you eight bucks a day which adds up a lot cornbread corn dog in the oven in the morning bulk buy Costco juice bulk buy Costco coffee bulk buy anywhere he likes the ones from the store I'm sure he does I bet he would like growing up in a household that isn't financially stressed.

1:06:20And when you guys get stressed, you start and beating. So it's like, it's true. You want him in this house? I don't. This isn't the house of the kid. And you prioritizing that is prioritizing the bullshit of the house getting and vaping. We're vaping. I mean, yeah. That's not good for you. And that's expensive. $27.36 there. Come on. That vape will last a month. It doesn't matter. You're putting it on credit cards that you can't pay off. These are your, we needed this to survive. Shit. Corn dogs and vapes. Come on. Hell yeah, brother. No, it's stupid. Corn dogs and vapes. Big automotive,$7 ,800.

1:07:00Five dollars. What did you do? That's a motor. That's an engine. Oh, yeah. His truck blew up. Truck blew up. So right now we've been driving. Wait, did you have other? I swear I saw somewhere you had other cars. I got multiple cars. Then why'd you have to fix this one? Because the other ones don't run. They don't run, yeah. Can you scrap them for money? $300 for a car? There you go. You said you have five of them, all right? Take it and throw it towards the cards. One, two. Of credit cards. Like four. There you go. I'm not scrapping a 72 Chevelle. I could sell it for sure. She won't let me sell it.

1:07:26I won't let him sell it. Sell it. $25 ,000. I won't let him sell it. Why? Because when he was going to, this was back in his florist days, he had$20 ,000 cash. We were supposed to save it for a house. I did buy a house. We went and looked at a Lincoln Continental. Yeah. And I said, hey, maybe we shouldn't get this car because we're saving to buy a house. And he bawled his f***ing eyes out about it. So I was like, whatever, dude. And then he went and bought his Chevelle for$12 ,500 out of the$20 ,000 that we saved for the house. Not true. So sell it. What? I don't give a s***. Well, I don't want him to sell it because you bawled your f***ing eyes out.

1:08:01Made me feel bad. So keep it. That's his choice then. I've offered. Sell it. What could you get for it? Honestly, probably like$22 ,000. Sell it, please. That pays off this credit card. Now, I wouldn't immediately pay off this credit card unless you close it, unless you change your behavior, or else you're going to rack it right back up again because it's basically maxed out. Corn dogs. Men's warehouse. Fuck me. Oh, yeah. Racing? Hold on, hold on. Racing,$300 in racing. He said they have to use this credit card to survive. Yeah, literally. Racing,$300. What the fuck? Racing. Something racing,$313.76.

1:08:35Okay, well, I don't know what racing is, but men's warehouse, I had to pay for a suit. To survive. And Men's Warehouse? No, I had to be in a wedding. I'm okay with that one. I'm not okay with the bullshit. When there's other cars you can drive right now. Well, I wasn't expecting to pay for that. Golden Dragon and Taco Bell and Corndogs and Corndogs. Sonic Drive-In,$53 there. And a Patreon membership for$55. Oh, yeah. That was too, I don't know if y 'all want me to plug him or not. You can say who it is. Damn, what's his name? I don't even know. It's the British dude with glasses. He covers everything.

1:09:14You know what I'm talking about. Nope. Yeah, you do. No idea what he's talking about. Oh, he has like a thousand channels and they're all like documentaries? Yeah, yeah. What's that dude's name? I don't know. Yeah, he did. Guarantee. I don't know his name. Did you subscribe to him? Everyone knows what he looks like. He's bald. For the David trials. No, he's not bald. Who the fuck are you talking about? He's like your age. And then I don't know who you're talking about. I can't think of. Guarantee you his Patreon membership does not have as much content as Hammer Elite does. I only did it for the David trials.

1:09:41$55, dude. Yeah, I'm going to get rid of it. Still$55. Hammerly, it's better. I already got Hammerly. I got it like four days ago. Best Buy. Yeah, it's just Corn Dogs, McDonald's, and bullshit. Dude, this is insane. You have to stop. There's worse. I mean. It doesn't matter if there's worse. This is still bad. No, I mean for us. It's going to be thousands. Great. It's going to be thousands of dollars of interest this year. That is not good for your kids. I know. Honestly. Okay. You have another Navy Federal. Yeah. Why not? You're just collecting them. I got three of you. Well, only the minimum is put towards it.

1:10:20Thank no spending, but it's still at$5 ,386.90. Takes 21 years to pay off. Minimum,$134. It's going to be thousands in interest this year. Wait, what's this? Is this another Navy Federal? Yeah, I got three. If you or your child spent years growing up on social media and experienced serious mental health struggles, you should hear this. Recently, a jury ordered Meta and YouTube to pay millions for their role in designing and promoting addictive platforms. They knew their apps could contribute to anxiety, depression, and body image issues, but did not share those risks while prioritizing profits.

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1:11:34I personally use them when I can leverage them for a situation. So we have good personal loans on CalebHammer.com. We also have auto insurance now. You can check for free and see if you can save a shit ton of money on auto insurance. Remember, none of this actually matters if you continue the same bad behavior. So it's not for you if you still suck. But if you've proved you can budget, check out these programs from personal loans to car insurance to see if you can save a shit ton of money across the board. Go to CalebHammer.com or the Caleb Hammer Financial Resources part of the pinned comment or description below and save a shit ton of money.

1:12:09No, what's this? I have an August monthly. What is this account? What am I looking at here? Dude, stop barfing. You're a freak. I'm sorry. I'm trying to get a shit ton of water. It's water. It's not carbonating. That's a lot of gas stations. That's probably me. Oh, that's what I'm living off now. Oh my gosh. This is what you're living off now. Cash advance. Cash advance. Cash advance. No, I can't. Antiques. Corn dogs. Antiques. Bullshit. Filipino Market. American Eagle. That shit was gross. Journey's Kids. Palmetto Moon. Burlington Stores. Old Navy. Corn Dogs. Corn Dogs. Corn Dogs. I think Dairy Queen maybe?

1:12:48Corn Dogs. Sonic again. Corn Dogs. Panda Express. Corn Dogs. Smoking and vape. Boot Barn. Academy Sports. Toy store$200 Corn dogs Hertz car rental This is what you're living off of 90 % of it is bullshit You're not living You're having fun This isn't living dude This isn't being a responsible father or partner This is being a piece of shit Who can't control their wants and desires Most of it is for my son Doesn't matter You're putting his life He's gonna have to delay His entire adult life because you guys won't be able to retire and he's going to have to take care of you. And we're not going to have social security like we have today.

1:13:36This is the way I said it. So her graduation date is next year. Mine is a few years after. But when she graduates, we're straight. And we were good. No, because you're going to have to take time off to go to school. I know. No, no, no, not fully. But we were good before this. And I don't want him to pay the consequences because she's going to go to school and I'm f***ing. You will. What would be good when she graduates? When you guys make more money with your lifestyle, you're going to inflate your lifestyle. That's what happens every day. Oh, who do you think is right? You guys in this situation or me who's talked to 1 ,000 versions of you?

1:14:11I don't think he talked to anybody like that. We're going – I was paying off$2 ,000 a month extra just to pay off debt. Now you're living this lifestyle where you couldn't come back. When you make more money, you will spend it all. I'm dead. Maybe. I hope so. but probably not based on just how everyone in this situation does it because I know for a fact you guys are planning on taking a massive vacation the moment she graduates she wants a car she wants an AMG that's a that's a that's a so where's the where's the where's the vacation to even though back to Disney World oh back to yeah that's it when's the last time you guys went to Disney was it last summer or the summer before yeah it was a couple summers ago we went for two weeks and how much did you guys spend probably like 10 ,000 bucks I don't know.

1:14:57$5 ,000. Insane amount of money. Are you going to do that again? Exactly. That's what's going to happen, guys. That car that I stopped using was maxed out on that trip at Red Lobster. They come back and said I still owe like$13 off the bill. And that's why I was like, ooh, shit. Yeah, Navy Federal, Strawberry.

1:15:18Metroplex there. um corn dog Wendy's Instacart Pizza Hut Rural King some strawberry restaurant barbecue McDonald's it's all bullshit guys you spend all your money on bullshit it's only gonna get ramped up and worse I've seen it every time you can't tell me it's not going to you're bullshitting you're a bullshitter it's all bullshit man the only thing it is is we're just trying to maintain not having to you shouldn't be maintaining this is an insane lifestyle This is unhealthy and bad anyway. It is unhealthy and bad, and that's why I've been getting even more stressed out because I have no idea what he's doing, but I know that it's not it.

1:15:56Spending all his money to make everything seem as if it's all right. But it's not. It's not. It's not. It's not all right. And when I was working full time. It's not all right. You have to accept that. But I can deal with it. No, you can't. It's all going to maxed out credit cards. Soon you'll be at that cap, and then there's nothing to do except open more credit cards. Until next year. Yeah, I know. Until next year. I don't think you'll make it to next year on this trend. They're going to be maxed out. You're going to have to open personal loans and shit. No, I've got enough room left on that one.

1:16:22No, not the next year. If she'll work, I'm good. Sounds like she won't, and you don't let her. No, no, no, no. Well, yeah, maybe a little bit. But it's like, it's unfair because we're racking up the money. So when I graduate and I start in my argument, I have to work my ass off to pay all this off. It's all bullshit, guys. Both of you need to sit down, look at your purchases and spending across all accounts and stop. We have another Navy Federal on yours. This is$11 ,500 with$555.79 a month. She gonna see? He put that up. I'm sure he did. It's gonna be thousands in interest again. You have another Navy Federal.

1:17:02We have a shit ton of Navy Federals. Now these are hers though. At this one, we have$7 ,670.61. They're spending on here and interest with a minimum monthly payment of$276.02. Yeah, I wanna see what you spend money on. I don't see it. She got her nails done and then she got some bullshit. Is nails done not bullshit? It is. They're both bullshit. It's stupid. She gets them done and eats them off. I don't eat them off. There was nothing there. I had to take them off. Exactly, because I'm not getting them done anymore. You shouldn't. You can't. No, I'm not. Because especially you can't afford it.

1:17:39Well, how about shit and it gets played with? You guys are in an emergency mode. You are. Sam's Club Synchrony Card. 11 years to pay off. Why? Well, because the balance is$1 ,948.69 with a minimum, you're over the limit. See what I mean that you're approaching it? You're not going to make it until next year. What are you talking about? I honestly don't know how they got over the limit. We have great services at CalebHammer.com that I wish you could take advantage of, but it's not for you. You could use the car insurance one, obviously, but we have personal loans and shit. That's incredible, but not for you guys because every time you get access to more money, you spend it.

1:18:13And this is proof. You shouldn't have it. It's for people like me, not for people like you. So you cannot open more credit cards to get to the end of next year. And I know that's what you're going to do. Instead, you need to accept that you're in a bad situation and cut down on spending. That's what you really need to do. Minimum monthly payment,$68. I tried to get a personal loan through your website, but I was trying to get it to consolidate debt. And you shouldn't because you haven't taken control of your spending. You said you're trying to make it till next year. That is not the person who can consolidate debt.

1:18:43You'll get in double the debt. I don't have enough income to do. Good. I'm glad you didn't get approved. Good. It's I've always. I got approved. Your interest rate was just too damn high. It's like. Probably because you have a shitty personal loan then. That's because. I don't have any. I got personal loans. That's it, man. There's personal loans that are good. And it's for people like me. I've always said this in every single plug. I want to create financial services for people out there like me, like people out there. I've taken their survey. Most of them are doing okay. You are not. I've said in every single plug, you shouldn't do it.

1:19:13Why are you doing it then? Why won't you listen to me? Just don't get enough money. No, it's because you're looking for more debt to be able to spend. Whenever I did have a job and I was working full time and he was paying off debt, I feel like he never spent any money. No, I didn't because I was paying off debt. But now, I'm not paying. I'm not paying. You're going to go there all off. He's literally spending everything. So why spend then? Why do we spend when we have no money? Because I'm in there. That's f***ed up. But I'm not going to just, I can't go. Yes, you can. What's the other dude that does financial?

1:19:43Yeah, I'm not going to f*** beans and rice. Yes, you should. I mean, should, yeah. Well, then what are we talking about then? If you're not going to sacrifice anything, go f*** yourself. I want to sell a car that's like my dream car. I'm cool with sacrifice, but I'm not - But not sacrifice enough to actually get you there. But my son won't notice a car gone, but he's going to notice if he can't handle more toys. He's three. Yeah, he's three. He has a lot of kids. He's ready for - I got a 12-year-old. If you just go through life, and if you have any kind of discipline for the kid, If you have any kind of parenting abilities, you can get them through it.

1:20:14My parents did. You can. I'm fine. I thought you came from middle class. No. I want to say so. No, you're not. No, no, no. Born poor, mostly came up lower middle class. My parents are certainly middle class, maybe upper middle class now, but not during my youth. That's just because she went back to nursing school. That was really good. But again, that was like, by the time she completed that, I was in early high school, so I didn't reap the benefits of it. And my dad's been successful now, but that was only after I went to college. So that's where I feel f***ed up because I feel like we went from middle class, damn near, probably upper middle class down to lower class.

1:20:46And it's hard to make that transition of like. No, guys, I'm sorry. Not going out to eat every single day multiple times is not lower middle class. Cutting that back is not all of a sudden lower middle. You wouldn't know lower middle class. Come on. Lower middle classes, your utilities get cut off. Foreclosure notices on the house. You not being able to get a corn dog every day is not lower middle class. Shut up. You're privileged. You're acting like a f***ing American. $6 ,768 on this Synchrony card. Minimum payment made$146. Takes four years to pay off. Who even knows what it was for? I don't know.

1:21:20Okay. Oh, my gosh. There's so much here. Man, I just think, isn't it? It was for your HVAC. See, if you're able to get HVAC, you're not lower in middle class. Shut the f*** up. Wait, what is that? We lived with no HVAC for six months. And that's horrible. It was hot. $2 ,236 is your... Apple card. Oh. That's my Apple card. No, because I paid that off to zero, and I said, don't use it. Exactly, because neither of you can do this, which means both of you need to do it together. Go through our Master Your Money program. Learn budgeting. Learn debt. You guys are$2 ,236.34. Yeah, my Apple card gets a little crazy because I forget.

1:21:55Why? $72 is your minimum. She forgets her wallet. So I use my phone. Put your debit card on your Apple Pay. That's what I've said. And then I did that, but one day my debit card got denied. Then you shouldn't be spending money. Well, I know. But I don't know that until I get to the inn. That's on some weird crystal shit. $73. What the fuck are you doing? I bought like a tarot deck and... Stop. This is pathetic. It's bullshit. I don't do that. If you go through my statements, I do not spend money. I'm sorry. This was literally less than a month ago. Like, shut up. You can't... Guys, you can't do...

1:22:30You can't not misbehave for the two weeks knowing you're coming on financial audit and say your entire life changed. Like, shut the f*** up. This is what you just did as you were applying. So shut up. Just stop. I didn't know when you applied. Just stop. This is a cope. This is a cope. You knew in the last two weeks that you were going to be on. So shut up. Okay, and when did I buy that? Voodoo. I'll tell you exactly what you bought less than two weeks ago. Voodoo. Fandango. Jack in the Box. McDonald's. Voodoo Fandango. I rented a movie. So that's what you did. So shut up. This is cope. You're giving me cope.

1:23:04I don't even know. What does that mean? I've never heard that. Cope? Yeah, like a coping mechanism. What did you call it? A coping mechanism? Oh, fuck. Synchrony Amazon cart. Looks like it's his. You guys, fuck. He's spending money. No, he's not. Yes, exactly. Shut the fuck up. What? You were spending thousands on the other cart. Shut up. Because I gotta live. What do you mean? Is that what you were telling her when she was trying to kick you off? I gotta live, woman. I don't know what I said. 621-57. You were confused? Yeah, because I thought she was. Yeah, he thought me kicking him. Maybe just stop.

1:23:39Go jerk off in the bathroom. Yeah, I had sights 2020. I mean, come on. The fact that you made it to finishing is kind of wild. That's what I'm saying. I literally kicked him. Where did he finish? I kicked him off of me, launched his ass to the end of the bed, and while he was rolling backwards, he finished. That's crazy. Yeah, that's crazy. He's into it, though. You have an apple cart, too, and you have hundreds of dollars. No, no, no, no, no. Yeah. Oh, she must be spinning on it. I don't even have an iPhone. That's my mother. Matter? I'm going to spend on a card. I don't have a hat. $359.39. It's a physical card too, dude.

1:24:12$50. I don't care yet. And you could have spent it previously. Yeah, it's probably previous. I keep physical cards in the closet. Splendies? Splendies. Your T-Mobile bill and Roku. That's panties for her. Probably subscriptions. Yes. I buy stuff for her. Also, you just got rid of your iPhone. Oh, yeah. What are we doing? PayPal. Okay, yo. just$67.01, dude. Just pay that off. The minimum is... Like 30 or something. I'll pay it off. I don't even care what the minimum is. 40. You're past due. Huh? It's$40. You're past due. Past due, asshole. It must be. And a late fee added. Amount past due. How the f*** am I?

1:24:57$7 past due. I must have... Oh my gosh. AT &T Collections? That's her. Oh, okay. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. I have disputed this multiple times. I don't care. It's on there. Shouldn't be. Okay, mortgage. 118 ,865. I guess it's not that higher cost. Illuminary, like I said earlier. This place is cheap. Not six years ago. It is a higher cost. We just got a cheap house. You got a good place. Okay, what's the interest? 4%. That's wonderful. What's the minimum of the payment? $1 ,077.72. You owe 118 ,865. Oh my gosh. Okay, student loans. Yeah, those, I'm just paying the interest on those. Yeah. So what's that payment?

1:25:42One is$32 and one is$25. The$25 one is a set amount. I have to change it, so I have to go back in there. So I'll put it for$57 for now. Your student loans are$21 ,539.47. I don't think you have to pay the interest, but I'm not opposed to you doing it. That's what I was going to ask you. So are those good payments even going towards the balance at all or is it just straight interest? No, it's the interest. But with it being 6.39%, I'm not opposed to her doing it, especially since it's not a make or break for your budget. You can pull it back if you want to if we're being aggressive because there are higher interest rates in your debt.

1:26:23But I'm not freaking out. Okay. I already looked at your student loans. Okay, this Navy Federal, is this one I already went through? $4 ,895? No, that's hers. I went through hers, too, though. Is this an additional Navy Federal? I don't think you've done hers. Yeah, I did. I went through two of her Navies. She's got three. No, there should be one that's like— Is this an additional? No, that should be one of those. Okay. You got more than— No, I should only have two. Oh, okay. Well, we already did that. So this Navy is—well, we've already done that. Okay. So it ain't that three. Not that bad off.

1:27:01Well, you have Navy Federal car loans. Is that those? I got one, yeah. Most of them are paid off.

1:27:10Okay,$3 ,590. Does that sound like one of them? You said$3 ,000? $590? I'll say this Navy Federal. That sounds like a credit card. My truck should have like$6 ,000. Is this Navy Federal student loan? Yeah. They're all Navy Federal. I got my student loans through Navy Federal. Oh, this is an additional student loan. This is like a private student loan. Not federal. No, the student loans on here. Oh, wait a minute. Were these the Mojila ones? Yes. Okay, so yes, I have two private student loans. Oh my gosh. Which I, and I have to get more until next year. Yep, my co-sign. Great. Or you could cash flow it mostly with how much money you're spending on bullshit.

1:27:50So$4 ,895 and it's$25 a month. And then whatever this other one is, which I think might also be student, probably is$3 ,590. Great. So we're in the world of getting private student loans now. $31 a month there. What a f***ing joke, guys. Okay, Navy Federal. No, I'm back to Mojila. Okay. The Mojilas I don't have to pay on until I graduate. You're just doing intros, right? Or is that the one you were talking about earlier? That was the one you were talking about earlier. My private ones, I paid. So I'm stopping that. Okay, got it. A financial aid? Oh, him. I got students. You already owe. You owe me$27 ,276.

1:28:34You're in school right now? I am in school and work. You guys are borrowing everything. Literally. Okay, well, no payments yet, but... Probably will be. Gonna jump. You have private student loans as well, dude. Yeah, Navy Federal. Huh? Navy Federal. What do you owe on that a month? $1 ,414.65. Probably like$25. This is insane Guys this is insane Oh my gosh Okay more debt This is like It won't stop I mean we're That's why No you're literally not You're spending so much on bullshit Do not use the word try with me Someone's car I'm trying No you're not Yes I am You were spending on bullshit too You're trying the last two weeks I will never allow that in this show No Yes, yes.

1:29:25I have your account from less than a month ago, so shut up. I mean, yes, I have silly - Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! You're done. Any amount of money, it's still not trying. Shut the fuck up. Shut the fuck up. 6.29 % on this car. What car is this? It's$6 ,113. It's a 2011 Tundra. And is this the one that just fucked up? No. Yeah, it's getting a new motor like this week. Good. You spent double the balance you owe on this, right? It's a good truck. Is it? Yeah, now. We're at$4 ,800. You just spent$6 ,000 to get a new motor? That's cap. You know damn good well Toyotas. You couldn't find a burn-up Toyota.

1:30:02Dude, that's his KBB. I don't know, man. I know. Well, I guess you don't know. $173.53 a month. The interest rate isn't the worst. Oh, my gosh. What's up? Other f***ing... Okay. There's another car with Navy Federal? No. Right? $6 ,124? That's mine. Truck. Okay. So that's just... Yeah, that's just on there. Oh, my gosh. Finally, through the debt. $5 in savings. Incredible. $67 in checking account. Corn dogs. Bullshit. McDonald's. Netflix. Corn dog. Bullshit. Corn dog. Bullshit. Corn dog. Maybe bullshit. Check this out. I don't know. Corn dog. Snapchat. We're paying for getting our Snapchat. Come on.

1:30:46We got a streak. Oh, you guys are so pathetic. Instead of taking care of your kid. Bullshit. Corn dog Amazon Corn dog golden dragon McDonald's McDonald's Maybe bullshit definitely Bullshit corn dog corn dog PlayStation bullshit nails Again corn dog corn dog Bullshit corn dog Snapchat again Disney plus Sonic Bullshit corn dog Corn dog snapchat okay guys Keep the streak up or don't How many times are you going to pay for this my gosh PlayStation corn dog PlayStation, for sake. Panda Express. What a f***. This is pathetic. I don't even like Panda Express. Retirement,$1 ,749. You're incorrect for that.

1:31:29Okay. Panda Express is awesome. So those. $118 in your acorns. Oh, his retirement,$42 ,000. I actually enjoy that. Wow. So the checking account I've spent since we've been down here, and just to be fair, because we did spend quite a bit. What are you telling me? Well, the checking account balance is less than what, whatever it says on there. We've spent some money since we've been down here. We get tattoos when we go places, like, but we ain't never been. Or do something we ain't never done. So we got tattoos yesterday. I got a bat. Literally landed, went and ate Mexican, and then left Mexican and went and got tattoos.

1:32:04Look at it. So, again, you guys care more about your own things than your kids. Like, I have no energy to give to that anymore. Yeah, congratulations. Okay, very good. Is that me? Yes. You can tell. Is that permanent? I mean, it's a tattoo. Oh, buddy. Oh, buddy. What have you done? But does it look like you? I mean, I could tell it was me, I guess. I look kind of p***ed on it. Like with the glasses. Mustache. I wouldn't say so because of the beard. Well, I went to Walmart last night and I had two people ask me why I got a p***ed tattoo on my arm. I'm like, that's not a p***ed tattoo. Caleb hammer.

1:32:48Okay, and what did they say? They're like, oh, okay. Sick. Okay, listen, buddy. If you did that, well, I'm not getting one of you back. Well, I wouldn't expect you to. How'd you get one of me, man? Well, to be fair, you weren't my first choice. My first choice was a monster truck that said good death. That makes more sense. I couldn't afford a monster truck. Why'd you have to get a tattoo? Because this is memorable. It is. There will be a video for you to. Well, that's true. Permanently, online. Yeah, but now there's just you permanently on my arm. Yeah, so now, like, when he's old and wrinkled, and they're like, what is that, grandpappy?

1:33:25He's like, well, back when I was 30, I went on this show. Shut the f*** up. I've gained weight since then. You made a mistake. Oh, for about the double chin? This is going to take me forever. No, there's a little double chin in there. Yeah. It's under the little beard. Well, thanks to Fat and Fatter, we're getting to a triple. Hell yeah.

1:33:45Debt payments, not mortgage included,$2 ,263. $1 ,053. Wait, that's a month? Minimum monthly? Yeah. That's where you're at, dude. You won't stop spending, you pathetic worm. Including on me. Shit's not even funny. He's not even funny. No, it's not, but you're the one spending. I don't work enough income. I don't know what to do with you. $1 ,077.22 is your mortgage. Gas, like for the home. Gas, electricity, trash, sewer, water, internet, all of that combined, how much for utilities?

1:34:22Average 260.

1:34:29Okay. Vroom, vroom, drive, drive, gas. Both of you together. A month. Average 400. Car insurance, how much? Altogether 195-ish. Not bad. Phone bill, how much? Oh, that's$150. Is it? No, it's$125. I got it to go down. Okay. Groceries. I'm going to do$900 meal prep, meal plan, warming up meals, but you're buying them, cooking a few times a week. Meal prep, meal prep. You guys are busy anyway. You should be working your asses off. TP, find anything else for you and your kids to survive? $300. What that is changes every single month, but it's the basics. It's the necessities. Are there co-pays medical on a monthly basis?

1:35:14No. Is there a gym? Yeah, because we got prescriptions. Okay, just how much, son? Probably like 50. Is there a gym? No, we don't. What current pets are there? We have three dogs, one cat, and two turkeys. So probably like, what, 200 and feed it for a month? I'll go through one big bag roughly in a month. For all pet supplies and shit, how much a month? 60 plus, let's say, 10. No, I don't know. It's like 120, maybe. Okay, I'll do$150. I'll meet you guys in the middle. Okay, I mean, you have to get some pet insurance for the dogs and cats. Yeah, my mom sells pet insurance. I'm going to say$200. Oh, she pays for it?

1:35:56No, she sells pet insurance. But she said I shouldn't get it. Well, then she sells shit pet insurance. It saved my ass many times, let me tell you. If they get in trouble and their life shouldn't be dependent on you being shit. Yeah, that's right. Okay, and your mother takes care of it. some other things. Well, she takes care of groceries. Do I cross that out? You can take three quarters of it out. You can put us on$300. I'll put you on, okay, I'll put you on$300 so I don't have to do daycare and shit. Anything else that I need to put in this budget that I have not? You got the auto loan in there?

1:36:32That's in the minimum monthly payments. Okay, then. I don't think so. No, I don't think that's all of it. I'll try to give you subscriptions of$100. bucks. You choose where that goes. You need$5 ,420 and 75 cents to survive. Obviously we don't make that. The reality is, and that's with no bullshit spending, you need to make at minimum$2 ,500 a month to survive. So you need to go do that right now. You need to make sure you're doing that. If you hit that, then you can stop working for the rest of the month, but that's what you have to make net minimum. And then that's with all your income included.

1:37:10You guys are budgeting together. You're going through every statement together. You're plugging it all into Dallas, which you guys get for free forever. You're seeing my therapist, and I'll pay for that. And then once you finally graduate, yes, that'll help you. That's still the minimum you need to make when he takes more time to school. You need to make$5 ,500 minimum to survive. And once you graduate school, we're talking a couple years, and you can start hammering it to the set. And it's going to take maybe a couple years. So with your strong income, maybe a few years, but you're going to sell your cars, pay off some debt, but nothing matters until you change your behavior first.

1:37:46You don't survive. She doesn't make extra money until you change your behavior because it won't matter and won't make a dent in anything. You won't survive if you still spend all this money. So she needs to make extra money, yes, but you need to reel in your behavior now. Your bullshit spending was a minimum like$2 ,000. Minimum$2 ,000. It was more than that. So guys, it's crazy. Whether or not this relationship could be saved, I don't know. You need to go to therapy. You need a budget together. And you need to get your shit together. You need to stop spending this money. You need to stop being abusive.

1:38:16You need to seek help. That's what we got to do. So that's what we're doing at least until school finishes and then everything changes. But that's what I would do for now because right now you're focused on survival. So let's focus on that. I'm going to call his mom in the post show and get her opinion on what happened. And we're going to see. And you know that's going to be crazy. There's so much more we didn't talk about yet. Let's get your hammer financial score first. Spending in a budget, you have to spend 0 out of 10 debt. There's collections, 0 out of 10. Emergency fund, there's nothing 0 out of 10.

1:38:44Retirement, this is where there is. But for making up for you guys, both together for your age, it's still only about a 4 out of 10. Real estate, what's your house worth? About 235, I'd say. Okay, real estate's really good. Still a loan, so it's technically a risk, but 8 out of 10 is basically as good as you can get until just a house is fully paid off. Which is fine. That's not a bad thing. So that's what saves you. Hammer financial score, 2.5 out of 10. Get yours at CalebHammer.com for free. Now join us in the Financial Auto Post Show an extra 20 minutes of this episode. It's always juicy. It's always crazy.

1:39:17Three premium shows a part of Hammer Elite every single day, six days a week. It's incredible. That's why there's over 120 ,000 monthly active members. You can join on YouTube by clicking that join button or link below, or you can download the Hammer Elite app or go to HammerElite.com. It's the same on both platforms. Just want to give you more options. I'll see you in the post show. Well, let's see what your mom thinks. We wanted a call, and they want your perspective on something. They told the story about a few weeks ago when what she said is she, he r***ed her. No, I don't think so. I think, um, doesn't.

1:39:47And that's why I said I have no help. I just launched the brand new Hammer Elite app available on every major platform. So you can watch every show anywhere you want. You'll get three exclusive dedicated shows every single day, Monday through Saturday. Refer a friend after you sign up and you get an additional 30 days of Hammer Elite access for free. Download the Hammer Elite app by using the link in the description or pinned comment down below. This is the best membership you'll ever join, and that's a promise. I want you to be on the next episode of Financial Audit right here in Austin, Texas.

1:40:19If you think you have interesting finances with an interesting personality or a story or a life or relationship, I will personally pay you to take time off of work, fly you down to Austin, get you personal transportation, a hotel, food, and we'll have a great time hanging out. Go to calebhammer.com slash apply or click that link in the description below.