I (almost) Gave Up.. | Financial Audit

23:34It's a legal thing. Why would they want that, dude? Because the employer feels like they got ripped off. But honestly, in there, there was somewhere in that clause that I could claim unemployment. And who won? I initially won. That's why I was honest. Who won in the end? You know, the one that matters? The employer, honestly. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, they did. They did. Dude, what the fuck? I mean, that's just it. And it was settled by court, right? Yep. Well, there you go. This wasn't even a mutual agreement between you and the employer. So that's it. You fucked. Okay? You fucked it. I fucked up.

24:11Your choice. Your fraud.

24:18I mean, Colton told me you were ranting to him that you lost on technicality. that's technically a technicality in my books but that's it that was the contract this episode is brought to you by state farm listening to this podcast smart move being financially savvy smart move another smart move having state farm help you create a competitive price when you choose to bundle home and auto bundling just another way to save with a personal price plan like a good neighbor state farm is there prices are based on rating plans that vary by state. Coverage options are selected by the customer. Availability, amount of discounts and savings, and eligibility vary by state.

24:58Yeah, but when you think about it, it's the rules. When you think about the contract, it states in there that you can claim unemployment if you give them two weeks notice. And the court said? No. Buddy, I don't even know. This is so much paperwork we got to get into the finances, especially since they'll answer questions better than you. But first, we know what came in Am I looking at the joint house? The whole house? Nope, that's just me This is just you My wife didn't want to be a part of it So her paperwork's not in here That's none of her stuff So I have to cross out her$3 ,200 Yep So it's$3 ,200 How much was spent last month?

25:36What was the outflow? We know the inflow What was the outflow? Outflow includes everything that's outflow What would the outflow be? We know inflow We know inflow We know inflow How much was outflow? I would probably say$9 ,000. Newsflash! It has been over 16 years since the federal minimum wage was raised to$7.025, and company productivity has doubled while our wallets have not. And let's be honest for a second, it feels like the system is broken, and we all deserve to be able to get an apartment, house, or car just like our parents could. But to do that, you need to have good credit. And that is why I want to put you on to today's sponsor, Kickoff.

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26:46That is 80 % off the normal price when you go to getkickoff.com slash Caleb today. That is Kickoff without the C. Get K-I-K-O-F-F dot com slash Caleb. Grab your tits, dude. It's$10 ,892.78, but why would$9 ,000 be considered anywhere near acceptable for a father of two children, one being under a year old? Why the f*** you give me that answer? I don't know. Honestly, bills get to be a lot with kids. What are the bills? What are the bills? What's$9 ,000? $10 ,900 specifically? What is that? How does that life end up being that? Can you tell me? Please. There's some medical bills for her that I put on her.

27:27Oh, how do we f***ing? That's everything. What the f*** are we doing? Dude, I saw$1 ,500 going out to eat. We all saw that, right? Did we all hear that? And you immediately go to the medical bills? No. No. Food's never on my mind. I just like eating. I think food's always on your mind. Oh, yeah. Well, you don't get tits for no reason. No. And debt payments net were$776. So, fuck you. It was putting them on a farm. You spent double your net debt payments to go eat out the feet. You got to pay the bills somehow. Not even the household. You. You. Just you. Yep. I don't know what else to say on that.

28:05That's just me. I think about food and I eat it and I'm done. That's it. But it's not even the household. No. It's not even the household. Not me. Not Marini. You. It's all you, dude. The you. This spending. To my wife, I screwed up everything. Are you going to blame the kids next? No, they're innocent. They don't even know how to talk yet. Two-year-old can't talk? She can somehow talk. Not a kid expert. Well, three years old, they can start fully talking. Two-year-old, they start learning words and sentences. My son is bullsh**. It's an additional 600 bucks, so we're talking like 1 ,600 bucks there.

28:41Unknown spending. We don't even know what this is. We're going to find out. It's usually Amazon, Walmart. Probably, fuck you. $2 ,000. Dude, this is insane. This is insane. In every measurable way possible, this is insane. And that's why I'm here. Oh! Frank! That's why I'm here. Yep, ding, ding, ding. Ring the bell. Celebrate. Woo, there's confetti falling that the editor put in. I'm glad we hit it. Well done. That's why you're here. No, shit. I just like, listen, that's why you're here for me to tell you did 11? 11? 11? Big guy, do you budget? Is there anything? Is there any indication of any semblance of attempting to do anything here?

29:21I wouldn't say I budget, but I put down in my notes on this app. I have everything laid out, how much it is and where it goes. The notes on this app? Yeah, I have an app that tells me where all my bills go and how much it is. So I kind of know roughly where I'm going. What the f***? Why not just use the budgeting app? It's not a budgeting up. But that would be better. You can create a budget on it, but realistically, I don't even know how to use a budget, clearly. Oh, for f***'s sake. I'll put you through the budgeting class. What the f***? That's insane.

29:50What do you think your score is? Zero to ten. Zero being the worst, ten being the best. Your finance score. What do you think? Negative five. That's not an option, so I'm going to assume zero. I'd say zero. Yeah, sounds about right so far. If you want to see where you stand in the world of finances, take the Hammer Financial Score assessment, see where you're doing really bad, where you're doing great. It is free at CalebHammer.com. And if you don't want to be like a guest who ends up on the show, make sure you sign up for the DollarWise budgeting app. It is my preferred budgeting app. That is the one I use on a daily basis.

30:17Sign up for that free trial and if you like it, you can save a lot of money by signing up for the annual version. And when you do, I will personally sign my budget-friendly cookbook that is going away in just a couple months and that will no longer be available. I'll sign it, mail it directly to you. dollarwise.com. Learn more there. Link's in the description as well. Okay, we gotta get into this because this is I have a checking account first, which Not pretty, is it? I never start with checking accounts. So that means this is something special. That means this is something special. It starts with debt always.

30:53As I say negative, I'm currently negative in that account. Negative what? Anywhere from$200 to$300. No, negative what right now? Negative$255 and some odd cents. As some automatic bills came through and I still don't have a paycheck. Oh. Oh. Then you're grinding on the dash and not dashing. I don't have a paycheck, so you're not spending$1 ,500 going out to eat it. Is it as easy as that? Is it as easy as that? It's not even a question. It's not even a question. You tit. You absolute tit. Dude, no, is that even a question? If you can't pay your f***ing bills, you're not going out to eat your s***.

31:36You would think it's that easy. It is. It is. It is. SFF to FFF. It is. It is. It is. A lot of times you get home late, it's hard to book. What are you even getting late at home for? How many hours a week are you freaking out door dash? A day, a day, a day. What are your hours working door dash? A day. A day, probably ten. No, you doubt you're sitting in a parking lot ordering door to ask your car few 10 Well, it's 10 hours actually hours getting back late. What are you maybe seven? Oh, no actually Five guys we got back so late you're framing this as you got home at midnight after the grind at the factory This is just on the weekends now that I have a job when I was out there And what time do you get home from the job about five o 'clock?

32:24Oh, so late traumatic. You're almost dead What a sympathetic message Oh no I get home at 5 When most people are getting off by the way Thank you Oh Oh I'm going to be such a dick this episode Oh you are What an animal Yeah you started with negative 22 Now you're negative 550

32:52I don't even know It's hard to comprehend It's not. It's just like your existence is insane and that you're just excusing it with I got home late at 5 p.m. makes me want to die. It's not hard to comprehend. It's miserable.

33:10What do you do when the account's negative? You hope you get some money. And how do you get that money? You either go door dash or you go work a side job helping some people out weed their garden or something. Or I'll tell you what actually happens. you rely on your wife to pull the account with the negative with your paycheck with her paycheck more or less yeah relying on the wifey which honestly we should be doing in a joint checking account anyway so I don't know but it's weird that you have to pull from your wife who's like a roommate glorified that you stick it in but I don't want a joint checkbook cause then she goes in there and probably would take money that I'm out doing stuff with

33:47that you're out doing stuff with what are you out doing stuff with Paying the bills, going and probably door dashing, eating out, maybe going buying the groceries. And you're opposed to that? Her seeing that? Her, because she'd be contributing 32. It's just more complicated with the whole budget that I don't have. Well, then it's not complicated because you'd be building it from fresh. You're not changing something that already exists. But it would complicate how I go and pay all the bills and where everything goes. How do you pay your bills? This is more money. Put it in a pile. There should be one bills.

34:16Yeah, I wish I could say that. Why can't you? Because all the bills are technically all in my name. She only has two cards. It doesn't matter whose name it is. We're married. We're in a partnership. They're all our bills. Yeah, I just take control of the finances and kind of wrongdo them. But you're negative$550. How can you take control of the finances? You can't take control of anything. Do you not trust her? Not with the bills, no. No, not with the bills. You can still pay the bills from the joint checking account. Do you not trust her to be joint? No, I don't trust her with the money at all.

34:47Why? Why? Well, because when she was married to me, she actually was in debt, and I was actually free and clear. Is she not married to you? Well, she's married to me. Roll that back. No, I don't trust her with the money at all. Why? Why? Why? Well, because when she was married to me, she actually was in debt. Okay, you just said when she was married to me. When she is married to me, technically, I'm trying to fuck that up. When she is married to me? Is she not right now, but she's going to be soon? I'm so confused. She's married to me. Why do you have to qualify with that? I'm so confused. What are you trying to say?

35:17I'm not trusting her with the bills. Why? Because I have control issues with that. I used to be debt-free. She wasn't. And now it's flipped. Yeah. When were you debt-free? I actually in college. Okay. Dude, I'm a big guy. Oh, hold on. You're 27. Okay. I was thinking 35. Gotcha. It'll get better. Well, what? Your age? As time goes on. How? It gets worse for many when you're on this path. I mean, once you get in your 30s, don't they say everything gets better? Colt and Lindsey, do they? I just turned 30. I don't know. We don't know. We just turned 30. Unconcluded, right? Yes, my life is complicated.

36:02No, it's... You're being a dumbass, and you're not willing to be a partner with your wife. Yeah, but there's time to fix it. No, but you're not willing to partner with your wife. There's no time to fix it if you're not willing to do something. That's done. But when she gets her paycheck, I just take it and I pay the bills. And when my paycheck comes in, I pay it all. You take it? Yeah. I pay off her truck and all her bills. She doesn't have money bills. I say bills meaning two. Ladies and gentlemen of Financial Audit, this is one of the most exciting moments in this channel's history. You know, I've been working on building all these educational tools, our budgeting app, all this crazy stuff over this past year, because that is where my passion is.

36:41We finally did it and now we put it all into one program called Dollar Wise Central. You get the premium version of my budgeting app. You get the cookbook mailed to you and signed by me. You get to learn about debt, investing, budgeting, real estate, basic beginner stuff, and finance all the way to the advanced stuff. Collaborated by experts with the lowest refund rate in the industry for a reason. And guess what? If you are struggling or you want to learn more or you want to change your life in any way whatsoever, like literal tens of thousands of people have done with our programs, go to DollarWise.com.

37:20Click that link below. Your life will change. It'll be incredible. And I am here for you with an incredible support team that you can reach at any time. This is a no-brainer. DollarWise.com. Let's f***ing go! She has two cards and a truck. Does she have money? Yeah, her paycheck. When you take her money? No, you said you take it. Yeah, I give her about 30 % of it. You tax 70? Mm-hmm. Pay all the bills. What the f***? Are you guys trad? Traditional? Yeah. She's okay with this. Yeah. That's just how we agreed upon doing our reviews. Oh, I need to call her on the post show. I need to call her on the post show.

37:55This is insane. That feels so controlling and weird. Some would say it's controlling, but some... I just did. Well, me, I think it's come kind of normal in how I do it. I'm a control freak. I can't say anything different. But you're saying, if you're defining yourself and you have to use the word freak, I don't think that's considered normal. To me, it's normal. In my mind. To you, to the... Yes, it is. I pay all the bills, they get paid, and if it goes negative, it goes negative. You got to live somehow. You don't want to be late on your bills. So if it goes in your account and it gets negative, well, money comes in, it comes in, and it helps.

38:31Dude, to the drug addict, it's normal to sleep on the street. That doesn't mean it's good and normal.

38:40Okay. No reflection, apparently. Gotcha. Nope.

38:47But you were blaming her for her Teemu. Well, on her 30 % when you take 70? That's the problem? Because we could have more money to pay off more bills. You mean more money that you take? To pay off more of bills. Bills that you got into. Yeah. But it's a joint effort when you eat DoorDash at night. It's not just for me. So that's the joint effort. When it comes to the spending on the things you want, it's a joint effort. When it comes to taking care of responsibility and paying bills, it's a control freak. Yes. Okay.

39:23Affirm. Affirm. It's$100. $100. Apple cashed that on$120. Amazon. Amazon 216 there, then 52. McDonald's 24. Amazon 85. What the? The Zelenot$150 Subway Kendall Perkins restaurant $50 Lian Chin PayPal at$300 Huh? Love me some chicken from there Yeah, you're really on a diet ATM would draw$100 Going in and getting some bullshit What are you stopping in At the gas store? It's normally just gas No, that's You are not getting$4.73 of gas My Camry does It's only an 8-gallon tank So sometimes when I top it off It is only$4 You're not stopping in And getting some Bevs No. Maybe a candy bar, but that's about it.

40:09A candy bar? But a lot of times it is just gas for about five, six bucks. On the bigger side, it's probably her truck. Creature. Holiday, Panera Bread, McDonald's, Taco Bell, ATM withdraw. $1 ,500! Where'd that go? Up and vanish for bills. ATM withdraw? Well, that's kind of Apple Cash going into my checkbook. That wasn't Apple Cash. I see Apple Cash and I comment on Apple Cash. ATM withdraw. ATM withdrawal. Hmm. I don't remember about that one. Famous footwear,$135. That one actually might be gas after that for$15,$20. Chick-fil-A, Perkins Restaurant again, Applebee's. You're a neighborhood guy, aren't you?

40:53Heck yeah. I love me food. We've established that. Zellin' Out 10, Door Dashing Taco Bell, McDonald's, Rosemount, Car something. Probably a car wash Car wash is f*** you You're in Minnesota and it's not winter yet If it's winter with the ice I will consider it It gets dirty It's Minneapolis The roads are still disgusting Oh shut up You don't need a car wash yet Dump a bucket of water on your car Call it good Cough Culver's Taco Bell Zellano$350 Panera Bread Burger King McDonald's This is insane Arby's, Orleans Subway. ATM withdraw$126. Cooper Whiskey, In-N-Out. You have In-N-Out there? It made it there?

41:42No, I went for a bowling tournament in Vegas. I had to try In-N-Out. Very disappointing, right? I mean, I should be, but I'm not. No, In-N-Out, very disappointing, right? I mean, I like it. It's not that good. Oh, well. That's what I mean to say. Those were very conflicting pieces of information. I love when I very much enjoy things and say it's not that good. It tastes good at first, and then it's kind of just like McDonald's. It's bleh. Don't shit on McDonald's like that. Honestly, McDonald's is not that good. You are a fake fat. I'd rather have Chick-fil-A. Chick-fil-A is great, too. Let's not pretend you're doing it for caloric reasons.

42:27In and out, in and out. The Orleans again. Mickey Fence Fish Zellin' Out 10 Cooper Whiskey Car Wash Again Orland Subway Copper Whiskey In-N-Out Cinema For someone that In-N-Out sounds that good You have been a few times all in one month Going into the movie theater You were not getting$3.51 in gas from Circle K I do not believe that for a single moment That is a candy bar You're stopping in and getting$3.51 in a candy bar What the candy bar are you getting for$3.51 That's an insane candy bar size three musketeer. You can't go wrong with two separate. For$3.51? Yeah, that's how much they cost. That's insane.

43:06Buy a bulk bag. Dude, I can walk into H-E-B right now, our grocery store down here, and get a$5 pack of candy and have unlimited mini Milky Ways, but it's so much more than a king size. Why do you refuse to buy in bulk? Because it costs more. It's cheaper to buy just a singular. What? I'm going to f***ing die. I'm going to f***ing die. I'm going to f***ing die this. The Burlington Coat Event is back. Buy a coat now through November 29th and get$5 off your merchandise purchase of 25 or more from December 6th through December 24th. Plus, Burlington is donating 50 ,000 new coats to help those in need nationwide through our partnership with Delivering Good.

43:44We've been keeping you warm for over 50 years. We'll see you at our coat event. Burlington. Deals. Brands. Wow. Visit burlington.com slash coats for details. This is insane. Dude, everyone on this show stops in, gets their bullsh**, and they get it in such an expensive way. I mean, look, that's what you have right now. That's what you have right now. You have the Gamer Subs energy drink. That's why we started stockpiling this at the store here because you balk by it. It's so much cheaper. It's so much cheaper. And it's also delicious. I will honestly say that. It's cheaper. That's why we want everyone in the audience to start stocking up on that Gamer Subs, by the way.

44:23link in the description because that is so much more affordable than you stopping in and getting the candy bar stopping in and getting a one-off Red Bull what are you getting a Coca-Cola Pepsi own product you and it costs like three dollars a ten I don't get it bulk buy you don't have the money to go and buy bulk right off the bat you buy the small stuff I have the money that you have I just like buying the smaller stuff. Why would I want a whole bag? Because then I'd be tempted to eat the whole bag itself. I'm going to f***ing die. I'm going to f***ing die. You are just an animal, an absolute creature, an absolute f***ing creature, a creature.

45:04Look at that. Look at that. Their whole f***ing pack, their whole pack. Everyone on the show, it's always like a$5 energy drink. Their entire thing that is 100 cups, 100 cups. Their tub that is 100 cups is$40. $40. That's why we decided to partner with them because fuck you. 100 cups of$40. What is that? A serving. It's 40 cents. Instead of people like you who just stop in and get like a$5 thing or a$4 candy bar. It's insane. Buy bulk. Buy bulk. Yes, you can. If you don't have$40 up front. That's for the energy drink thing. For all the energy drink freaks. You? You can walk in and get a $5 to$7 thing from the grocery store, Walmart, a big bag.

45:50We're approaching Halloween. You know that's cheap. Not where I live. It's$25 for a 60-piece candy bag. Dude, I have it right here. 225 pieces, Target,$10. And I know you have Target there. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up! Hershey's assorted pack from Target,$8.29. Fuck you. It's there. It's literally right here. I will show you. I will show you. I will show everyone. Here it is. Here it the fuck is. Zoom in on that. There it is. You see it? You fuck. $8.29. I don't want to hear it. I don't want to hear it. Again, then it's a whole big bag that you don't want to keep. It's just one bar. But you stop and get the one bar.

46:40To me, it's cheaper just to buy one bar. You're done with it. To me, it's cheaper? How can we to me numbers? You can't to me a number. You to me. You don't just to me that. But it's easier. Is it? You would already have it in your car. You just described how you do it on the way here. You just described to me how you do it ash to your car because you don't want to get out and get something. But that's what you're doing when you're stopping to get an individual candy bar. Yeah, it's hard. honestly with baking money. Krispy Kreme. I had to get some Krispy Kreme while I was in Vegas. I had to get some Krispy Kreme while I was in Vegas?

47:21We don't have it in Minnesota anymore. What? They moved out of Minnesota and the only time you can get it is if you come down to Southerness. What? Yeah. Isn't it still in Michigan? What the fuck? Why would I drive to Michigan when I'm already doing something else? No, no, I'm just saying they're everywhere. I'm surprised they're not in Minnesota. No, they moved out about four or five years ago. I guess looking at you, I would trust you in your statement. Oh, I would have plenty of donuts. I am fact-checking, though. I mean, Minnesota, other than Minneapolis, I don't know what else. There's nothing else there, so it's like...

47:47They're planning on to move back. I know that. You're following the news, huh? Oh, yeah. There's a temporarily closed location in Minneapolis. They used to have one in Maple Grove. They'd have one up in the suburbs. They're all over everywhere else. Sounds like your problem. Okay, this is insane. Candy Bar McDonald's Dairy Queen Golf Fat Dogs for$71? Hot dogs for$71? I took the group out when I was down there. You don't have money. But they Venmo me back. Does he not look like the whale? He was just trying to save us from his own sad story. Hmm. Like, I'm just seeing it. You're straight. But he had a kid, too.

48:31Candy bar, Amazon, Amazon. ATM would draw$20. Zelen out$200. Zelen out$30. Zelen out$1 ,000. Zelen out$8.13. Amazon$37.99 Holiday Stations Panera Bread Car Wash again Three Car Washes In One Month F*** You Zello and I Had to keep it clean Dude In Three In One Month It's a new car It gets dirty You go through mud Dude I have I'm gonna jerk myself off You ready Open up Okay I have a much nicer car than you And I get It's like once every month Once every two months Hopefully it doesn't rust It won't And it's not winter yet Rust F*** You Do you not know what causes Oh, it's salt. Trust me. You're not in that season.

49:12In fact, this was July. Zellin' out, Sweet Needs, Amazon, Applebee's. Oh, oh, this is why they put the checking account up front so that they could kill me. Your bank might not be your friend. I see so many people on financial audit get stuck in vicious cycles of paying off late fees, overdraft fees, and interest from their own bank. which is why I'm excited about Current. Current isn't a bank, it's better. With Current, your money actually works for you. Qualifying members can get up to$750 with Paycheck Advance. Fee-free overdraft covers when you accidentally go a little over and you can use the build card to actually grow your credit.

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50:32Get your f***ing candy bars cheaper. Target. He went and got a candy bar, I think, at the checkout line. Oh, Aztec Mexican restaurant. I guess that's the most ethnic we can get up in Minneapolis. They do have some good burritos. Pretty good burritos. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Candy bar. Zelenow. Candy bar. McDonald's. Sweet needs. This is one month. Ladies and gentlemen, this is one document. One month. one document. I'm no whale for no reason. Huh? I'm not the whale for no reason. I like eating. Like I said many times. Your cope is so hard. Your cope is so hard. Unfortunately, that cope was probably not going to let you see 40 years old.

51:20Candy bar. Candy bar. I wouldn't be laughing at that. That's very real. Candy bar. PayPal and out. Holiday. Door dashing. Double Daz. You got premium. Perrion. Savage. Another Mexican joint.

51:47Wasn't that bad, was it? Editors put in just a glowing halo of beauty and amazing angelic noises because I am celebrating. I am celebrating. Oh, I'm so happy we're done with that document. That brought us to 50 minutes. That is insane. My life's complicated. What can I say? Your life's not complicated. You're a degenerate. Had$102 overdraft fees this year so far, which is now probably$150 after where we are this month. This poor wife. She's out with me. That's why they're so expensive. The guy is forcing her to give 70 % of her income, and then he f***s the house. This poor wife. No offense. And I'm sorry to do this to you because you're on the show and you're a part of the audience.

52:34I love you for that. You're the villain. I don't think about it that way. You are the villain. You take all of her money. You have kids. And yet this is how the finances end up. You're the villain. But the bills get paid. No. Even if it's negative. You're overdrafting. I don't know. I don't know. We're going to find out. Paying bill overdrafting. You. I don't know. We'll see. We'll see if they get paid. Honestly, every time I hear that, there's usually late fees. and seeing that we already are opening with hundreds of dollars in overjack fees? I've rarely been late on bills. I wouldn't trust you for anything.

53:05Rarely been late. Rarely is still, you are, by the way. The only time I can think of one is once. And I know that for a fact. I know I'm... Fact? Yeah. The only time I can remember, and that's a fact, you contradict everything with your language. That's my personality. Or has Tim Walz cut all education funding in Minnesota? I don't know. I don't do politics with them. That's not politics. I'm just asking if everyone's there. Maybe. Like, I'm concerned for the schools based on this conversation. I just happened to know the governor because you ran for vice president. That's not... Hey, I graduated, so that's something.

53:42Went to college. That's why I'm questioning. That is, again, why I'm questioning. You're not making that better.

53:52Not making it better, but at least I'm living my own life. For the next decade, if you're lucky. Yeah, maybe more. Maybe is such a boost of confidence.

54:05Okay, got a firm, I think. First debt. What's going on with this? That is a firm. If that's Home Depot, that's either a washing machine. Oh, I do see Home Depot. $3 ,780.22. Nope, that's the riding lawnmower that I bought. Yeah, we would hate to get any steps in But mowing an acre of lawn is actually pretty hard I don't care how fat or skinny you are It's actually a lot with a single push mower Yeah, an acre, sure, fair enough But for also what it's worth, one, you cannot afford it Two, you could have subsidized for a long time Having a

54:51mow the lawn for a very cheap... Cheap what? Numbers? Dollars? I'm confused what? Remember the burrito restaurant you went to? Oh, yeah. Yeah. I'm confused what? Someone would mow your lawn for cheap. Oh, yeah. No. Up there, it's$120. I had a quote. From one company. Multiples. They all give you$120 on the cent. It's within the range of$100 to$120 to mow that. Good. Mow it once a month. How long can that last us? And that's seven months a year. You'd have to do it every other week because there's ordinances in our city that you can't be more than two inches long on your lawn. Okay. That was seven.

55:37So that could get you about two and a half years based on when grass is actually growing in Minnesota. That would be two and a half years instead of f***ing yourself right now. It's not as easy as affirming a mower. Actually, no, it is because they just show up and do it. Yeah, but I'm kind of anal about stuff like that. I have to mow it my way. Wait. Now, Colton's telling me the lawnmower was a flip. What does that mean? Yep. I was kidding, man. I had to flip it because we had no money, so I took that and sold it on Facebook Marketplace. It was newer, so I took that as a loan. Wait, you don't even have it anymore?

56:09No. Why the f*** did we just talk about it for five minutes? I had to flip it for some quick cash. You are bad at conversation. Yeah, some can say that.

56:21What happened? And what are the numbers? I think in total on that loan, it's$2 ,700 for the mower. And then after fees and taxes, it was like$36. I have the number. I'm talking about you just told me you sold it. Dude, you're so bad at talking. No, that's literally what I sold it for was$36. You sold it for$36. Why is this balance still here? Because I took the money and put it in my account to use it as a loan to get me by. I took the cash from selling it on Facebook and took that money and used it for everyday bills and whatever I had to use. For how long? You spent 11 ,000 hours last month?

56:54That was about a month's worth.

57:27Wasn't proud of it It didn't need to happen, but it's honestly a lot better doing it that way. It's quicker. You don't have it. I don't have it. No, I don't. What made you sell it? Because we needed the money.

57:42You do stupid things when you're in need of money. Oh, shut up. Shut up. You spent... How much was the mower? In total, 36. No, the mower before all the fees and bullshit. It's like 2 ,700. 27. You spend$2 ,000 minimum, minimum, minimum, minimum, minimum, minimum, minimum on bullshit. That's a two-year loan. Minimum. And I haven't gone through your Amazon yet. $2 ,000 on minimum. Bullshit. Q. Q. You could have cashed. Well, not cash flow because you're going into debt for that bullshit anyway. But two months of your bullshit and you would have paid for this whole thing. Q. That's cope to the extreme.

58:15That is cope to the extreme. Desperate time steppers. There's more Home Depot. That's the washing machine. Hold the fuck on. Okay. One second. Okay, so I'll call this lawnmower then. So you're about to make a trade based on a friend's text. But which you do you listen to? Is it, we could buy a house in Tulum. Get optioning those options. We could lose everything. Or let's do a little research. Get your head in the trade and make the investment decision that's right for you. Learn more at finra.org slash tradesmart. First one, lawnmower, you owe$3 ,780.22. No asset to show for it, of course. With a minimum to payment, it looks like$164.42.

59:08What's the interest rate? Between 30 and 31. Typical a firm loan. A firm, by the way, is typical 35, so. No, it's not bad. No, it's probably 35. Last time I looked, it was 31. I could be wrong, like everything else. Oh, you're f***ing. Oh, you're f***ing. Okay, I see another Home Depot firm. This is for$650 with a minimum payment of$54.24. Also probably at a 35 % interest rate. For what? That was a washing machine. I had to basically buy a new one for my landlord because he claimed that we broke his. And did he force you to? More or less forced us to get a new one. Right then. You had to get it right then.

59:50You couldn't get it when you moved out? No, we didn't move out. We were still in that same house. I know. Oh, my. Dude, he is. Oh, my gosh. Colton saved me. I'm saying he was forcing you to buy it right then, right there. You couldn't have bought it when you were moving out. No. No what? Right there. Okay. Which I honestly don't even believe. I don't even know if he communicated or even understood what was happening. But what the fuck are we doing?

1:00:20Oh, you're late on two payments I thought you just told me you weren't Ever, and you're paying your bills That's what you were bragging about No, Colton's telling me you're late on two payments Oh yeah, that's on a different one on here You were bragging On my checking, yes Not a firm That's different You can't go negative on a firm It's just loans

1:00:51Yes, I'm complicated. You're not complicated. Stop saying that. You are a moron.

1:01:01I don't think I'm a moron, obviously, but, you know.

1:01:11Great, you got a washing machine. Did he dictate which one to get? No, I just bought him the cheapest front loader. Similar to what he had.

1:01:23If you want to think about it this way, I actually made$300 on that because at the time it was on sale. So it was a good deal. Wait, you think that's money in your pocket when you say made? Then you didn't make$300. It's still a good deal. I'm going to die. This is insane. What the... What the... Is this episode? What the... Is this... Okay. Okay. How about this? We got Home Depot. We're back for the third time $882.71 owed on this one probably a 35 % interest rate minimum payment $68.12 What is this for? That I can't remember There's a couple of them that you just kind of forget You just make the payment

1:02:07You're not even a quarter of the way paying through it and you don't know what this was It's not a quarter of the way done It's not even a quarter of the way done and you've... Dude. Can't remember what that one is. No, no, no, no, no. You went to Home Depot and you spent... $1 ,100. What did you get? Come on, come on, come on! Can't remember. Come on, this is four months ago. Four months ago. Four months ago, you walked into Home Depot and spent$1 ,100 to$1 ,200. You can't tell me what it was? Can't remember. Okay, Colton thinks, based on the conversation, that it's for paint and a couch. Yep.

1:02:42If that's what I'm assuming it is. I tend to forget things really quick. We moved into this house in the rental. We had to get things. You didn't have to get paint. And Facebook Marketplace a couch, you tit. Why would I want someone else's beat up couch? Because the rich people just get rid of it for free. Well, there's no one rich up in Minnesota. Oh, you moron. There's rich people everywhere. Minneapolis is a major metropolitan area. I guess there is. Okay, well, there's rich people in Minnetonka, but... There are rich people in Minneapolis, you absolute c**t. Ah? Still don't want someone else's used couch.

1:03:21You don't know what they did on it. Oh, you get it nice and cleaned, and then you f**k on it and claim it as yourself. Eh. Why would I want to f**k on the couch? That's kind of gross. On a couch? What's wrong with you? F**k anywhere. And everywhere. Yeah, but not on a dirty couch. I don't know who had it before me. You clean it, you beast. With what? A cleaner? Yes, a cleaning supply. One of those steam cleaners? No, that doesn't do much. Oh, well, you're going to fucking. You don't know they could have cockroaches. You don't know that. You would see that. You would see that. You would see that.

1:03:50A lot of times they don't come out. They're like bed bugs. They hide until you find them. Oh, my. He sucks. Paint again. Okay, you did not need paint. Can we at least. Oh, we did. Acknowledge that. It was a green room. It was lime green. Good, and you accept it. You accept it because that doesn't matter in your actual life. This was a wand. It has to be tan like the rest of the house.

1:04:22Okay, here's Amazon. This is Amazon. You owe$805 ,089. You've paid$17.70 so far. What did you get? What did you get for about$3 ,000? That was living room stuff before we moved into this house. That was like a book. You can't get used, can you, at all? No, it has to be nice. You don't live that life. When'd you move in? We moved in just under a year ago. Okay. Okay, you weren't making dick. You don't live this kind of life. The minimums of payments,$34.91. No, hold on. I actually don't know. I'm going to just assume it is. Pull up your Amazon on your phone and start a screen recording for me. ladies and gentlemen can I just be honest this show blows my mind I film four of these a week and I uh the first five minutes or so I'm like okay oh this is you know we're just I'm talking to a person by the time I'm 30 minutes in this show never fails to blow my mind how did we how how are we here right now how are we making this how are we making this show together all of us in this room right now how are you here how have you made it to this far in life especially with that figure this is crazy this is insane this blows my mind this blows my mind they left you on a plane give me this okay screen recording's happening oh he has the new glass update not a big fan i'll be honest as an apple simp not a big fan oh that's volume why don't you have your screen brightness Oh, you have it in weird...

1:06:00Okay. Okay, we got four princesses, four unicorns, dog furniture and accessories, dollhouse. Green Bay, f*** you. Oh, that's my wife, not me. Okay. I don't watch football. I'm glad your wife... Okay, you are the pussy of the family. I don't watch football. I don't like it. You're the beta. She's the man. Gotcha. You got glitter hairbrush. Definitely didn't have brushes. Bobcats. Don't know what that one is. That's another wife one. Montana State. That's another wife one. Okay, again, the mask one. yet you control the money. I think I trust her and I feel like I can't wait to talk to her in the post show.

1:06:34More football, more sports hats. Love the brain book. Love theoretically. This relationship's not going well. Book. Green Bay Packers bow tie. We got pens. That's fine. Three year monthly planner. Great critical for life. Return completed. Someone's in your driveway. I'm putting your phone on. Do not disturb. It's probably another squirrel. Except I also don't see that. Is this the update or is your button layout just horrible? No, that's the new update. Where's the do not disturb? Ring, someone's in your driveway. I'm thrilled. I would like to. Oh, where's do not disturb? Where is it? Where is it possibly?

1:07:15All the controls I need is right there. Except for do not disturb, of which was a requirement when you walked into this room. Okay, what are these? Trash bags? That's fine. What's the return? No, what? This is not all your orders. I saw so many purchases. Your orders since when? Probably recently. Last three days. 30 days. Okay, that one's returned. First day of school. Shirt, cough, sleeper, book thing. Oh. That is. Wife likes to have a little fun with that one. Yeah. It's 8.7 inches long. Realistic dildo with strong suction cup. Double layer silicone. See, I'm not all that bad.

1:08:06Are you sure? Because, again, this is... You're not that bad? No. This is to compensate. No. Both at one time. Truck bed... If you want details, that's both at one time. Hey, you gotta spice up the marriage somehow. truck bed thing baby things lots of baby things lots of books okay i see she went for um the very tanned and cut flavor and she was i mean she probably doesn't want sorry she selected red instead of She's not into those people. I'm sorry.

1:09:00She's Danish. What can I say? What? What? She's Danish. She likes white people. She's not racist, but she likes white people. She's not racist, but she hates the blacks. I didn't say she hated blacks. She doesn't hate black people like that. Like that? In bed. It's a dildo. She likes it in bed with white people. Yes, I know. Trying to make sense of it. It's hard.

1:09:33What can I say? You probably shouldn't have said that.

1:09:40Okay, this Amazon's basically brand new, I think. What's this Amazon for? It looks like it was a purchase of$320. just recently. That was recent. Was that the dildo? Probably. Okay, we're calling this one the dildo. Paid a little extra to make sure it's the right race. $242.30. Minimum monthly payment, $80.76. Nope. $13.46. It's one of the cheaper ones.

1:10:16Okay, Amazon. Halfway done paying this. Looks like you purchased$250 five months ago. What was that? Amazon? Yeah. Probably just more basic stuff. Okay, I'll just call this bullsh**. It's a lot of just everyday things that the wife wants. Everyday deal does. $26.48 minimum payment. Balance$144.73. How old's the wife? $24.

1:10:51It's pretty good looking, too. Sure. Matter of fact, it's right on my screen. I'll see it. Do we have consent to show her face? Not the kids, her face. Not right now, as she's currently a teacher. Okay. I kind of don't want to put her out like that. No, but I see it. That's okay. No, we won't put it in there. That's fine. Hi, listen here, Financial Audit. I've curated the exact resources and tools I personally use or would use if I was in certain situations. So take advantage of these offers in the resources section in the description below. The first one, I've moved my investments to Webull. Do the same and transfer to my investing app of choice and you get cash bonuses of$200 all the way up to$30 ,000 depending on initial funding amounts and up to 8.1 % APY on your money and up to 3.5 matches for your IRA.

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1:12:30Take the assessment at calebhammer.com. You will not regret any of these. Change your life today. Okay. Now I know what the woman's like. That's taking a nine-inch. 7.8 to be exact. Oh, sorry. Eight-inch. Can't have too much for a nine. I don't want to exaggerate. No, of course not. Delta Airlines. Looks like you just did this about a month ago. Yep, that was the flight to Vegas. $606. Again, these are all at 35%, by the way. Usually 35.99 % is what a firm is at. You are fueling their entire stock price. $55.25 is the minimum payment. I don't even know what to say. $606. That one's a six-month loan.

1:13:10What are we doing? No, it is not. It is 11. It's 11. 11? Oh. Yes, it's 11. Yes, there's more. You're just not a debt person. I'll set you up with the FizCard, debit card that builds credit. Okay? I'll set you up with that so you can't spend what's not in your checking account, which was a problem for you. If you ever want to get a higher-paying job, a lot of people in our audience have used Course Careers, so I'll set you up with one of those for free as well. It's a good certification program. And I'll also get you on the Webull app, okay? That way, when you're ready to invest, you can throw money there and get boosted APY for money that's just uninvested.

1:13:46It's a good savings place. I'll get you set up with all that for free, plus all of our education programs. So, sake, you're just not a debt person, man. Oh, okay. But you also just did a price line thing a month ago. Yep, she went to Texas. Why? To visit her dad's while I was in Vegas. Because the grandparents took the kids for a week. You guys are uncontrolled. $257.69 left you guys are uncontrolled and also $23.43 a month again we're at like 35 % interest this is forever Expedia is this the hotel yep for her I'm gonna f***ing die man okay we're at$156.41 Is there anything you do not affirm? Actually, the question, the answer is yes, because your checking account was also madness.

1:14:40This is insane. You affirm everything, yet you also blow all your money. Everything's easier. That doesn't mean it's good. Because it breaks it down in payments. It's easier to control it month-to-month basis when you have no money. But look what happens when your payments hit, and now you're negative$550 right now. That's because you've stretched your life, where you put everything on minimum payments, and now they've all stacked so high, you can't afford minimum payments to save your life. Makes it easier. That's all I can say. Except now you can't make your payments. When you go unemployed, that's how it happens.

1:15:09When I was unemployed, yes. We're not. And this was last month. Another price line. Flight. Another flight? To where? To the Vegas. What? I just had that with Delta. Yeah, the flight home. It was one-way tickets. You got them one-way? Roundtrip actually was more. You are a f***er. Dude, you, I don't know,$167.98. Are you embarrassed? Yeah. Good. No, actually having someone tell me about all this debt, yes. Well, this is... Menards? Now that's Midwestern to its core. So it's the worst Home Depot. Yeah, it's... That's where my parents met. Really? Isn't that cute? Yeah, I mean, a little flannel, why not?

1:15:54Yeah, that jingle gets old. What the did you get? Probably some basic stuff for the house. You don't even know. This was just a couple months ago. 360 bucks Okay, I'll call it stuff All furnace filters Probably about 40 bucks A pop right there It's a newer furnace That he put in You had to pay for the furnace? Yeah Why? This is a rental Because when we moved in He told us that Certain things are on us And then when we moved out Did you sign the contract That stipulated that? We didn't really look Through that contract Well if you did Then that might be right But I would also talk To maybe a lawyer And also Colton's telling me It's for a grill Yep

1:16:33I have hard memory trying to remember a lot of things of what I buy. I mean, honestly, there's a stack of paper. It's hard to keep track. It's almost like a bank account when you use a firm. You kind of forget about what you buy. You have it. You forget the loans there. And that just tells you you need to pay it. Minimum monthly payment,$30.22. Balance,$302.24 for a grill. A critical necessity for life that your family would not have survived. Well, I can't get a$120 grill. You have to get a nicer one that's not going to burn. You can also just not get a grill, you f***ing creature. What, are you going to grill burgers?

1:17:07Ridge Wallet? I like Ridge Wallet. Yeah, they're pretty cool. They were a sponsor once, but I still support them even though they didn't come back. They're good. You just can't afford it. I had to get a new one because they didn't want a lifetime warranty mine. Dude, you can get a little Amazon wallet. Cheap. Why? When a Ridge Wallet's better. Because you can't afford it would be the answer to why. Why? Because you can't afford it. It's nicer that everything's protected. Yeah, but you're going to find it! But it's protected. It's RFID'd. If I get a basic leather one, well, I've had my stuff stolen multiple times.

1:17:35Stop leaving it places! No, it's not leaving it. People taking the numbers or something. $115.15. Minimum fee payment,$10.04. Buddy, I just, this is insane. You just get everything you cannot afford! Seeing that now, yeah. Ford Blue Cruise hands-free highway driving takes the work out of being behind the wheel, allowing you to relax and reconnect while also staying in control. Enjoy the drive in Blue Cruise-enabled vehicles like the F-150, Explorer, and Mustang Mach-E. Available feature on equipped vehicles. Terms apply. Does not replace safe driving. See Ford.com slash Blue Cruise for more details.

1:18:20Yeah, seeing that now somehow. It's easy. It's a one-click button. You're approved. You're good. You just don't think about the payments in the moment. Alina Health, this was the thing you blamed all of your shit on at the beginning. And this is one of the smaller balances on all the affirms out of the 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12 we've been through so far. And this is what you set the conversation up with to begin with. You. I put my medical bills on there because when I had the money, I was paying for them. So that bill was like$1 ,300 to start. And then at the time when I couldn't pay it, I just put it on there because you can use it as a card.

1:18:53Your medical bills or your daughter's? All of ours. That's all the one count. $361.81. What happened to you? Basically tripped and fell and sprained my ankle. Stop. $36.24 is your minimum monthly payments. Balance is$361.81. Also probably at a 35 % interest, which doesn't make sense. Do the payment plan at the hospital. It's 0 % interest. You have to have credit for them. Oh, for... Seriously, they run your credit and they tell you no. This one just says Affirm Virtual Card, so you're just out there swiping. Okay, so this one's just straight up Affirm Virtual Card. That's the online one that's named that.

1:19:27That's another medical bill. Oh, okay. We'll call this medical then. That was one of the ones that they would not do with me in payment plan. $204.88. Minimum monthly payment,$17.08.

1:19:42Crazy. Okay, we're done with Affirm. Thank... but even worse, credit one, the enemy of all credit cards. They showed up in the mail one day and you're like, yes, please, let me destroy my life. The first one, no. I signed up for the first one myself. Second one showed up? Second one showed up. They had a really good APR 0 % for the first five months. Five months? For five months. It was an odd term, but I took it because I wanted to use it as just a gas card. Oh, good. You're over maxed out. I pay my bills, guys. Pay the minimums. $64.52. Interest,$14.72. Fees,$8.25. Minimum monthly payment,$34.

1:20:23He purchased on the horrible, horrible evil credit one card,$8.25. What did he purchase on? Two McDonald's on that horrible card. Just in that month, yes. That's so stupid. It puts you above the limit. You're losing endless interest and fees on a monthly basis here. What can I say? You can say don't do this and close it. Close the card. Yeah, but doesn't it hurt your credit? I don't give a... Your credit's nothing. Who gives a... It's actually 610 last time I looked. Yeah, that's not good. Close it. I thought it was better than normal. Normal? Because a 720 is normal. That's what I'm taking it as.

1:20:59Huh? 720 credit score? Isn't that normal? It is normal? And you said you're a 610. 610 is better than 300. You just said you're better than normal, and then you said normal is 7... I'm normal. 600. Editor, roll it back. I don't give a... Your credit's nothing. Who gives a... It's actually 610 last time I looked. Yeah, that's not good. Close it. I thought it was better than normal. Normal? Because a 720 is normal. What the f*** are you? Can't say. I don't know. I know. I know. Answering questions. Very difficult. Oh, we're at a 28.24 % interest rate. It's better than the firm.

1:21:42Quicksilver, what's going on with this card? Is that the big one or the small one? I don't know which one's which. Okay, how about this? This one's at$3 ,245.73. Minimum monthly payment$116. What's going on with it? That one was supposed to be my everyday card. That was my first card. Would you have an everyday card? You can't manage cards to save your life. Jeff, who are you to have an everyday card? Because I claimed bankruptcy about four years ago. No, you did not. I did. No, you did not. And they offered me that right after bankruptcy. So I used that supposedly as groceries. This is why we do not debt consolidate, bankruptcy, credit card transfer, pull from 401k to take care of our debt situation until we fix our behavior and show that we can at least maintain a solid budget without f***ing around for three months because then we end up right back here again.

1:22:32This is another instance of it popping up as usual every time it happens. I'm going to die. This takes 17 years to pay off if you do minimum payments only without any purchases. But guess what? Oh, you purchased. You purchased$130,$193.97 to be exact. And guess what? Open this right after bankruptcy. Oh, we're over the limit by$125.73. Kill me now. Why? You got to live. You got to live? Yeah. You won't be much longer with McDonald's, candy bars, Apple Bill, hotel and casinos. Oh, fuck off. Rosemount, Car Spot. There's a fourth. There's a fourth one. A fourth one this month. Fuck you. Car wash.

1:23:16So stupid. So stupid. Apple Bill, Apple Bill. Fuck off. Pull up your phone again. Start a screen recording. I'm going to die. I'm going to die.

1:23:29No, not this. I don't give a fuck about that.

1:23:36Dude, you get notifications every five seconds. Bill Tracker Pro. $20 a month? A year. Oh, that's okay. That's pretty good. Listen, but that's not as good as a good budgeting app, like dollar-wise. Whatever. Sticker Go, Paramount Plus, Golf, Apple TV Plus, Golf, iCloud Plus. I mean, that's the one I can allow. It's just insane, man. It's just insane. I just don't know why you allow this. I just don't know why you even allow this to yourself. Almost$400 in interest loss this year so far. We're back to credit one, ladies and gentlemen. We made it. It's the second out of the third card. Oh, my gosh.

1:24:19There's still so much more to go. $680. At least once the funds only maxed out and not over maxed out. $680.93 minimum monthly payment. $35. Yeah. $60 of fees,$60 of interest. Taco Bell. All that for Taco Bell, huh? And almost 30 % interest rate. It's been maxed out for two months. Shocker. All for Taco Bell.

1:24:48Another credit one. Good. I'm going to have to use we should charge them when I have to use the second piece of paper in my notebook. This one's also maxed out$798.54.

1:25:06Oh, minimum of the payment$40. No purchases. Well, we're maxed out. Interest and fees, of course. 105 in interest, 95 in fees. 30 % interest. This is insane. This is just insane. Mission Lane. Haven't seen this in a second. What's going on with this? That was going to be my gas card. Lots of cards for a lot of things that we all just max out and use on fucking bullshit.

1:25:31Balance,$586.89. Why did it not turn out to be the gas card? Because I see you purchasing gas on other cards. It was just an everyday card, and then you didn't have a job, so you have to put things on there. Why did you have to go bankruptcy four years ago? College loan. They wouldn't let me take it off, so I had to do something with all my credit cards. Dude. $159 of purchases and then$15.90 of interest. Three years to pay off. I'm going to die. Oh, it's, yeah, maxed out. It's all for Wendy's and gas. Wendy's and gas. Basically 80 bucks in interest this year so far. Wendy's. Strain our lives for Wendy's.

1:26:09This is just so good. So good. Discover it. What's going on with this card? No purchases. Well, it's because it's close to max out, but. That one was the one that I had in college. That was one that they didn't close in the bankruptcy. Why? Because that just didn't have a balance. They left it open. $439. $0.27. Minimum monthly payment,$35. 16 months to pay this off. $41.73 of interest this year so far. Aspire, MasterCard, I've never even heard of this. It's another low-level kind of a credit one. Well done.

1:26:50$301.81. Interest charge,$10 this last month. Minimum monthly payment,$34.66. Do we need to have a third Fat Stack week already? This is insane. What are we doing? Eating out, apparently. Understatement, big guy. An understatement. This is at a 36 % interest rate. That's insane. That's new to me. Also, lots of fees this year. Probably late fees. $85. $19.17 of interest. Quicksilver. Again. Yep, that's my small one. They offered it me in the mail and I took it because I needed the money. That one was actually for groceries. $267.59. Minimum of the payment. $25. $269.91 of purchases at the max. Crazy.

1:27:48Uh, another car wash Holiday, Raising Canes U-Haul moving in storage Taco Bell, Starbucks Going in and getting some bullshit Taco Bell and more gas What the f*** are we doing? What the f***?

1:28:08Sounds like I need treatment for food That might be real Avant That's another low life card New Balance,$203.88

1:28:21Yeah. Payment, no purchase. Interest charge,$5.86. Minimum monthly payment,$25. Ten months to pay this off.

1:28:37Had$75 of fees this year so far. I don't even know what it is. That's an opening annual fee. That's an opening annual. Oh, and interest charge. Purchase is also at a 36 % interest rate, dude. 36 % interest rate. Oh, my gosh. This continues. Toyota Camry. Yep. That's my car payment. You got a brand new car while you have all this. That's why I need the car washes. While you're unemployed. I got that in December. That was why I was employed at the chemical company. Well, you could not afford this at the chemical company. I know what your money was. Not this. Okay. Toyota Camry.

1:29:16$41 ,149.79. What Americans will do. I don't give a shit. 7 % interest rate. Minimum monthly payment on your income, even less income, which is substantially lower. $752.25. That is insane. Guys, this is paid off in 2031. Six-year loan. Next decade. Next decade. What do you think this car is worth that you owe$41 ,149? Last time I looked, it was worth$31 ,000. That's about right. Just about. There's a little negative from the last one because I didn't have gap on my older car. I got backed into at work and they claimed me 50-50 at fault. Is that your F-150? Mm-mm. I mean, told you still owe on a repo from your F-150?

1:30:00When I was leaving the refinery. Oh, dude, you do every bad thing. Is there anything you haven't done that is bad? Payday loans, maybe? No, I haven't done a payday loan. Wow. I won't do that. Surprising. I doubt that. We'll see. How much do you owe on that repo? If I want to take it out in one lump sum, they'll do a 50 % cut at about$8 ,000, but I owe about$16 ,000 left. Well, one time at what? At just about$8 ,000. So half of the loan. This is insane. The car is underwater by$10 ,000. The borrowing, the difference, honestly, still might even be worth it. I might borrow, I would sell it, borrow$10 ,000 to cover the gap once we make some more progress on debt and boost your credit up, and then borrow$10 ,000 on a used car that two mechanics approve that will last you safe for a couple years to come.

1:30:47That gets you down from$41 ,000 to$20 ,000. Yeah, that would really help. Yeah, it would really help. Student loans for who? Me. Yeah, because we don't have your wife's shit in here. You said there's double... Okay! That's just the government loans. I'm going to die. $22 ,792.01. What's the minimum? Right now, there is no minimum. you don't have to pay on them because the government's forbidden. Forbidance? Yeah. Nelnet's being sued. Forbearance. Nelnet's being sued? Yep. That's why? No, but that's just a student loan servicer. Were you on the save plan? Mm-hmm. That's why. That starts next year.

1:31:29That starts in the summer. I think it's June or July. I doubt it's because of Nelnet. That's the Nelnet one. Yes, yes, yes. I know. What is? First mark? Yeah. That's my private student loans. Nelnet's a federal student loan service. But they're serviced by Nelnet. This is not Nelnet. This is First Mark. Are they owned by Nelnet? Maybe? I don't know. Oh, for... That's about$56 ,000. No, this is my last thing. That means I don't have savings. That means I don't have retirement. Or 401k. That's retirement. Well, you have an IRA and a Roth IRA for your work, too. For your work? You can. Not for your work, that's your own private retirement.

1:32:13I just consider it retirement. It is retirement. They're all retirement and there's none. Nope. Okay, then what? Oh, dude, you are such a creature. Man. That's why my wife married me. I'm different apparently. Your student loans will be about$250. Actually, you're going to be automatically enrolled into the RAP plan repayment assistance program. At your income level, household income, I'm going to assume your payment is going to be like$100 a month. Okay. Maybe 50. We don't have to worry about that. Cool. Okay. Private student loans. What was your degree? I was going for mechanical engineering at Iowa State.

1:32:49You probably should have... Going for? You dropped out. Dropped out after two years. Well, you probably should have kept that high-paying job and moved for it. Fixed your finances and then moved back. Oh, my life. $53 ,970.13. Wasn't a cheap school out of state. No, it wasn't.

1:33:12Minimum? Monthly? What's the minimum? On that one, it's paused currently, but when I was paying, it was roughly 540-something. When does it resume? I don't know yet. It's just occurring in interest while you're just sitting here. That one's on forbiddance as well. Forbearance. Forbearance. Not forbiddance. Forbearance, yeah. You don't know when that ends? Mm-mm. You logged in. Well, that's going to be death when that happens, and it's going to be higher now because you're... It's just scaling because it's accruing interest. I mean, listen. Your optional interest payment alone is$1 ,387.

1:33:55Yeah.

1:34:01Extension until

1:34:09it's at a 11 % interest, right? Dealing interest. That's a payout through. Yeah, it's a variable loan. Well, it's going down then, but it won't be good. I wish I could see when it ended. Good luck us making a budget. Are you going to do that car thing I talked about? I want to. Okay, then I'm crossing out the car. I'm going to make your new minimacy payment approximately$400, okay? And you'll have a$20 ,000 loan for that.

1:34:41Okay? Okay. What's the typical credit you would need for a loan like that? Well, I actually saw in one of your credit reports about$650. It's going to be a debt-to-income ratio that's rough. So that's probably why they don't approve me for loans. No, you could get a car loan. It'll be a sh**ty car loan, but it'll still be the lower balance that you'll aggressively pay off anyway, so it still works. So it'd be through like Capital One or something. Yeah, you're going to trade in possibly maybe a negative equity position. You're going to take out a shitty loan, close to like 19%, something like that.

1:35:11Yeah, it's going to suck, but it doesn't matter because you're not going to have it for long because you're going to include it in your snowball. But car companies will approve you for shit loans. You only get a car that you're able to take to two different independent mechanics and get their sign off. So we'll do that. That's the first thing you're going to do when you get home, okay? You're going to start looking into it, and that's how we're going to budget you. But we'll see the difference. We'll see the difference. Okay, total income, because it's only just you,$3 ,400, because you guys are really weird, and I'm going to call his wife in the post-show, so stay tuned for that.

1:35:42Extra 20 minutes of each episode. Debt, minimum monthly payment. Yeah, let me add this up. Good the fuck, me. $23.43 a month again. We're at like 35 % interest. This is forever. $301.81. The interest charge,$10 last month. Minimum monthly payment,$34. New balance,$203.88.

1:36:15Yeah, uh... Payment, no purchase. Interest charge,$5.86. Minimum monthly payment,$25. 10 months to pay this off. The max out,$798.54. Editor, you should make this like some sick montage or something. Whatever. I'll do what I want. $1 ,364.59. So that's like half your pay gone. Good. Now mortgage, how is that paid if we're like rent? How is that paid if it's like you and her? And how do I calculate this? My mom pays$1 ,000 towards rent. My wife pays the other$1 ,600 right now. And you pay? I don't pay anything currently. What about utilities? I used to pay the other half. What about utilities? Utilities, about$600.

1:37:07Do you pay that? Yes. Okay. Is that including the internet? Yes. Phone bill. Phone bill is about$230. Switch to helium whenever you're done paying off these phone bills if the mobile is good there for$15 a month. That's crazy. $230 is fucking insane. Gas, vroom, vroom, drive, drive. If I would have to guess, probably$130 a month. Dude, I don't know. I saw a lot of gas. I saw a lot of gas. I'd get closer to two.

1:37:37Actually, I had 591. That's probably because of DoorDash. Okay, I'm going to say 200 then. Car insurance. Insurance for both of us. Well, do you pay for both? Yes. This is so weird. Yes, it's 341 a month. Okay, necessary food How does the grocery spending work? I pay for it Okay, do you have to shop for mom? Mm-mm Good I'd say about$250 What? A week Because you got two kids I was going to say about$1 ,000 Well, one's on formula still But pretty soon they're going to switch it over I know, that's not horribly cheap $1 ,000 TP fund anything else you and the family need to survive We could probably do$300 Medical healthcare co-pays We don't have a copay plan, but it's, what was it?

1:38:31$150 a paycheck for the plan. Oh, yeah, but that gets taken out prior. Yeah, prior. So technically. Gym? Is there a gym? Clearly not. Subscriptions? Let's try 40. Are there pets? Yes. What? A dog and a cat. Ages and health? They're both good. One's almost five. One's almost four. $150 for pet insurance. Pet food, how much? The cat, 16 bucks. We get the bigger bag. The dog has to be on a special diet. She's... How much? About 60 a month. 76. Anything else that needs to be in your budget that I have not put in? Nope.

1:39:15Oh, and we're... By$1 ,000. $4 ,301.59 is owed, and that's with us getting you a cheaper car. Okay. Okay, so, yep, underwater by$1 ,000. But it's weird with the, I'm still confused how you're doing it with the wife coming in. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. This is, I'm sorry. Here's the actual probably plan. Listen, if it works by the 70 % you take, but you pay other bills with it, you said, which is not calculated here, which is so confusing. So I'm just going to assume you can't afford it. You're already working. You're already doing DoorDash. Prove for three to six months That you can actually follow the budget Change your lifestyle Change your behavior And then go through bankruptcy again That's pretty much it Like you f***ed it Technically you can't claim bankruptcy again For seven years So I'd have three and a half You might just let your credit card die Go to all collections and just Do some debt consolidations Take whatever tools you can because you can't pay for this.

1:40:16This is done. But you need to change your behavior before you do any of that for at least three months consistently, no relapses. And that means facing your addiction that you likely have. Those are what we can do now. That's it. That's pretty much it. There's one thing I thought of. I brought all my credit cards. We can cut them up. That's not going to do anything. These are minimum payments. I'm not talking about your lack of spending. I don't give a fuck about that. I mean, yes, that is behavioral change. Congratulations. Cool. But you can just reorder them. So that doesn't matter. I'm sorry.

1:40:47You probably wanted to have a moment, but that's not the concern here. All right. I'm going to call his wife in the post show. Let's get his Hammer financial score and then I'll call his wife. But click that join button to join Hammer Elite for the post show. Spending your budget overspend zero out of ten. Debt. I mean, yeah, I mean, there is. Well, there's the$7 ,000 of debt I even do for unemployment. Zero out of ten. Emergency fund, nothing. Zero out of ten. Retirement, nothing. Zero out of ten. Real estate, nothing. Zero out of ten. It's a hammer financial score zero out of 10. Join Hammer Elite.

1:41:19Click that join button. Get three premium shows every single day, Monday through Friday, including this financial out of post show, which is an extra 20 minutes of every episode. I'm going to call his wife and it's going to get juicy.

1:41:33We are calling the wife. How bad do you think it is? How much debt do you think he has? $4 ,000? Oh, no. Let's try$133 ,779. Oh, dear God. You're messing up. Big time. Oh, that's funny. Exclusive members' content. Click the link in the description or pinned comment below and watch thousands of hours of extra and uncensored content.