I've Never Hated A More Vile Piece Of Trash | Financial Audit

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25:05Link in the description below. Sign up for time. Get that$350 right now in your checking account. Okay, that's never really better in my brain. I mean, I did reach out to the swan handler like not too long ago. The swan handler. Yeah, yeah. I don't know him. You don't? Okay, well. So it's like a Hollywood animal trainer. Oh my goodness, you tried to get wolves. I considered wolves because they have coyotes like adjacent, wolf adjacent available trained animals. They could be the ring bearer, you know, on their little head and they just kind of like walk up. But after seeing the swan price, I did not want to see the wolf price.

25:46So two white swans. What the f*** are we talking about? How much is this wedding going to cost though? Because if our entire intent is to budget to get to the wedding, if that's what the why we're here is. That is kind of why we're here. What is it going to cost? What's the whole wedding going to cost? Yes, you f***. 50 ,000. and a lot of that is like the venue you know we do have six log cabins included in that 20 000 um price tag because we're staying from wednesday to sunday and the main house you're doing so much more than you can do on your own listen i understand if other people are helping to chip in yeah but we have an unemployed his parents are they yeah they are how much so my dad's probably gonna put in 3 000 my mom 3 000 my grandparents though they're really nice they might give 10 Might.

26:32We don't know. So we're locking in these prices and we don't even know what's coming in. I plan on going into the wedding. Like I need this wedding to be what it needs to be. Why? Because I, you know, it's important to me. It's a day. It's an important day. I don't know. It doesn't need to be a life, putting your entire life. But I could pay it off though. Potentially. It depends what kind of debt you're doing. I make$88 ,000 a year. So. Not gross. Not gross. And first of all, who even knows? We have an aging population, so that helps for you, I will be honest. Job security is not an issue with this.

27:06But you're in a declining state population-wide and declining region. Yes. It's one of the most deathly populated states in the U.S. It's also one of the fastest declining population states. Yeah, but you know who lives in New Jersey? Old people, retired people, you know. Oh, I think they also go to— Florida. Florida. They do, but they travel back in Florida. But anyway— You're probably fine. You're probably recession-resistant. I am. resisted. Doesn't mean recession proof. And obviously you already saw what happens when someone gets laid off. Right. If you accumulate a shit ton of debt for one day that one day's done and all you have to show for it is debt and pictures and memories which I do vibe with but all of a sudden what happens without any kind of security any kind of emergency fund because you blew the entire emergency fund just to get a ring that is honestly Yeah.

27:53You wouldn't know. So it's fine. I mean I've bought my girlfriend things. Jewelry. Oh I thought you were going to say a ring and I'm like Caleb, please. Well, a different kind. Yes. Okay. Okay. Everybody has different tastes, obviously. But anyway, yeah. Well, like, I mean, I'm learning and like that. I'm like, all right. Yeah, not your style. I like more of a subtle demure, quiet luxury. You're anything but subtle. I know. Isn't that funny? Okay. Yeah. No. No, it's not. It's funny, but my jewelry is more subtle. Nope. Except this. This was from the Diet Coke care. But I'm saying, if you're blowing your entire emergency fund to try to get into this thing and then you accumulate tens of thousands of dollars of debt in order to do it.

28:34Afterwards, you are setting your entire marriage up for failure out of the gate. If anything were to happen, a car breakdown, a layoff while the other person also is already laid off. Like we're, you're setting your, your, one of the leading causes for divorce in this country are financial issues. I know. And you're setting it up for a very big struggle out of the gate. Even on my own though, like I would be able to afford this. You have any kids? No. Thanks. I'm actually getting my tubes tied on New Year's Eve. Like this. So you guys do not want kids? No, we do want kids. But no, I'm not. You don't want biological kids?

29:05No, he will have his biological child. I don't want. He's putting it in someone else? Yeah, with my consent. Is he doing? I told him if it's cheaper, we can definitely do it the natural way. But the chances of. Lucky guy. Yeah, listen. That's fun. You know. Will you be there? No. Getting cucked? No. I mean, yeah, no, that'd be kind of weird. unless he wanted me to, unless I could join in. Well, he might want that. Yeah, he probably would. So he's getting cocked. We were at the mall. So how do you plan to raise this kid? Honestly, when you guys have it. You're going to love this. Because I don't know how the fuck you're, you can't even afford yourselves right now.

29:41You're blowing everything on toilet. Okay. Which means I won't, but go ahead. Okay. So he, he's Vietnamese, right? So his. Right, I knew that. Okay, right. Of course. Right, right, right. Okay. No, his family's there. Golden retriever boyfriend, Vietnamese. There you go. Noted. All right. It's not usually what? Okay. Go for it. They exist? I'm sorry. Anyways. Yeah, for some reason. Yeah, Scala. For some reason, he never goes out and explores the tunnels of other people. Hmm. Okay. All right. What was I going to say? Children. So we do plan on having one kid. It's going to be his biologic. So he only gets to stick it in one?

30:18No. I give him all the consent in the world. He just doesn't have any desire. Okay, show me what this man looks like. Why? Because I need to see what he looks like. He's shy. I'm not going to show it on camera. Well, no, not on camera, but he sounds like a pussy. I like pussy. Eating pussy. He's not a pussy, though. This is a financial, after all. Okay, wait. I have to go on Instagram. Oh, this is our engagement pictures. Oh, you're going to be so shook. You're the man. I'm okay with that. Yeah, but I'm just calling it. He's a pussy, right? No, he's not a pussy. He takes care of me well. Look at that.

30:55Look how different. Oh, my gosh.

31:00That was in Vietnam. He proposed to me in Vietnam earlier this year. Oh, he's such a little gay boy. A little gay boy? Yeah. Colton, look at him. I'm the one to talk, love. Huh? You're one to talk, love. Why? Why? Well, I don't have a homo-hobo. I'm sorry. Why are you assuming that I'm gay? People say I'm gay all the time, but. He's so cute. I love him so much. We've been together seven years. He's a gay boy. That's why he's not going out there and sticking it in. He's going to have a kid. We're going to raise it in Vietnam for the first four years. What? Why not? It's closer to his family. Income.

31:36Let's just start there. Do you know how much it is? Like the American to Vietnamese dollar? Are you going to be with him? No. No, he's not there either. Wait, what? We're having his family raise the child for the first four years. Send him two, three years, and forget. He won't be there? Neither of us will. What? We'll visit. What? What? You won't be in the kid's life for the first four years? They're not going to remember. They're not going to remember. But listen, Caleb, you know why? That's a lot of imprinting going on, though. Okay, whatever. You know, it's nature versus nurture, nurture versus nature.

32:10You know what I'm trying to say? Kind of, except I don't know what you're trying to say. What I'm saying is child care. First of all, I'm not taking a step back from my job. And, you know, ideally, he's going to have his job in order when we do finally have the kid. His family is going to raise it, you know, in Vietnam. It's, yes, it's. We don't know what it's going to be, if it's a boy or a girl or a they them. No, but like my child would be the word we use. I mean, it's not my child yet. Oh, my gosh. It's a future child. You're not thinking of this as going to be your kid. You're going to fully think of it as his, not yours.

32:40No, I'm going to raise it. With the language you're using, you're going to raise it. I'm going to raise it. Listen to the words you're saying, lady. I mean, I do identify as it as well. So, to be fair. Do you actually? I accept all pronouns. You know. Oh, fuck. I mean, biologically, I'm a woman, but you can, I really don't care. Yeah. Oh, do you? You were unsure earlier, so. Yeah, but you told us, so I assume now. Okay, okay. Also, I saw the birthing hips on your Instagram. Oh, there it is. Okay. Yeah, they just won't be used. Anyway, the reason is, okay, so$20 here versus, okay, so the exchange rate.

33:15Guys, with what your dual income is supposed to be, yes, I assume both of you are going over there. You know, oddly enough, I assumed you were going to live with your child for the first four years. Oddly enough. Weird that I assume that. Listen, I mean, the people get raised by their grandparents all the time. Yeah, but their parents are also still there. Yeah, we're going to visit a lot. Yeah, every weekend? No, why would we do every weekend? Okay, why is it coming back at four? It. So we can send it to school, Caleb. Well, it's usually a five. Well, you know, pre-K, hang out, we can do sports and, you know.

33:47But the kid's going to think. We're going to send them to the best American, or not American, that's not the best. We're sending them to the best English schools in Vietnam. The kid's going to miss his grandparents, her grandparents. Well, the grandparents are actually over here. I meant like other extended relatives, like cousins and stuff. They're four years old, Kara. Oh, my God. They're four years old. Yeah, but they're going to miss whoever raised them. Okay, they'll get over it. Memories start developing, what, two, three, four? But even still, they still get imprinted. A little baby that doesn't have memories still cries for their mother.

34:17Okay, but get over it. You know? Like, they're just a little baby. Like, get over it. This is one of the craziest f***ing things I've ever heard in my life. Does he know you have this plan? Yeah, we're agreed. And he's okay with it. Yes. How was he born here? No, he was born in Vietnam. Okay. Does he know what you're saying when you propose these plans? Yeah. Yeah. Well, because the thing is, I probably, I mean, I'm like whatever with kids. Like, I do like children. Oh, he's just a little gay, fat. What? A Vietnamese guy that has a domineering clown goth woman. And I think he's just - Not clown goth most of the time.

34:57It alternates. He just accepts everything because he just wants to - And then he cut corners while you go out there and blast vagina. I am too poor to blast vagina at this time. This is so wild. So I'm just - No, I'm just seeing the picture. To be very clear, it's just you have an idea and he's like, okay. No. Why does he have that accent? Because he was born and raised in Vietnam. Well, first of all, he moved here when he was like 11. So he's been here longer in the United States than in Vietnam. Right. By like. Which means they usually still have an accent sometimes, but depends if not. No, my dad came here when he was 21 and he's like fully American.

35:36From Peru. My family's Peruvian. Yeah, but all I'm saying is he's a gay little boy. Okay, back to the gay little boy narrative. No, no, no. I'm seeing a lot of projection, Caleb. and it's not very flattering on you. It's not about that. I don't care what people think about me. It's not about that. I'm just saying he's a little simp who just accepts everything you do. I highly doubt he wants his kid that he is, you know. No, he obviously would prefer to have it over here. Exactly. That's what I'm saying. Yeah, you can say that. He's just listening to you being dominant. It's a oral kid. Well, it's that or no kids.

36:08Oh, you can send them. What is that voice? Oh my God. Japanese is the only one I can do without being hyper racist. so I'm just being micro dick racist. No, I wouldn't say that's macro racism right there, Caleb. I'm sorry. Trust me, I can get real racist real quick if we want to. All right. We got to tune into the Patreon for that kind of uncensored. Please, we do our membership on YouTube because we love the platform. Stop with this Patreon thing. No one knows what you're talking about. Oh, you did? Oh, never mind. Okay. Anyways. One for a reason, baby. Right here. Full racism and everything.

36:38Let's go. Okay. All right. So he just accepts everything you're saying. He doesn't want the kid to go. Well, I'm making compromises too. What compromise are you making? You have the open relationship. He doesn't. You get to send the kid away when you don't want to raise him. Okay, great. Yeah, but it's coming back. You get to keep your career instead of being a mother. Great, okay. Yeah, my right. It is your right, but what compromise are you making? None. My compromise is we're having a child. You look like this. Yeah, yeah. Not all the time. I don't have time. If a compromise is having a child, you guys should not have a child together.

37:10You guys shouldn't have a child together if your big compromise is having a child. Listen, I mean, I would, like I said, I don't, the thing is, I don't like babies. I like children. I like teens. I like them going into adult. Stop it with that. I know what you're going at, but no, no. I didn't say the words. I know, but your face is all goofy. Little gay boy. I'm sorry. It just keeps replaying in my head. I mean, and now it's going to be like a vocal stem. But anyways, so what I'm trying to say is I do like children. I actually, you know, I used to babysit a lot. Like I did, you know, obviously from four years.

37:49That's why, again, with four years old, they start having a personality. You can do things with them. I don't like babies. I don't like being trapped. I don't like, you know, having to do all that. Like I have work to do. I get up in the middle of the night to go work, you know, like people, people be dying, Caleb. It's not nine to five. You get calls in the middle of the night for this? Sometimes. Yeah. Aren't they just kind of waiting around? Yeah, but like hospice doesn't want you to like, you know, if you're at a nursing home, you don't want to leave the body there for like hours, you know?

38:19Ideally not. You're the only one? Huh? You're the only one that can go? I mean, there's only three of us. So he just puts up with anything. No, he doesn't put up with anything. It sounds like it. We're compromising. He's a little boy that's not getting a job since they're pretending to day trade. Come on. He does though. He actually does make the income. Yeah, but I also don't under, I don't think you know. You weren't able to adequately explain what he does. I don't think you know how much he makes in real money either. In real money? Well, he does make like a monthly. I said he makes$35. Which I don't know if I believe, though.

38:48I believe it. And we paid the bills. No, I don't know if I believe you. Okay, well. And we can call him and confirm. Okay. Okay, yeah, call him real quick. You like my phone case? Put him on speakerphone. There's a bunch of twinks. Yes. Represent. We didn't even get into that. Call him. please and thank you. All right. We'll get back into it. Are you guys combining finances soon? Yes. Please. Thank you. Oh, God. Hey, what's going on? How's it going? How's it going? What? How much money do you actually pocket each month from this day trading stuff? Pockets on average a month. I'd say about 2 ,000 to 2 ,500.

39:32See, you were off dramatically. By 1 ,000. Yeah. When it comes to that amount of money, that's like 30, 40%. That's a low month. That's a low month. That's high months. Listen, I know you're always thinking low main, but we don't need to just think low month. I need to know your average month. My average? Well, I said average. Yeah, sorry. I know averages scare you when you're thinking about averages in this world. The low flows, Caleb. All right. Yeah, then I'll say 3 ,500 is probably the average. Come on. You're telling me? I hear it. Didn't I say that earlier, Caleb? No, I hear it. Tell me I don't know.

40:10You're telling me he doesn't have it? When he came here at 11, I hear it. It's there. Have what? What are you talking about? Oh, 3 ,500 a month. I hear it. Benny honey teriyaki. Like, you know, the wrong kind of Asian, Caleb. Also, are you okay with your woman looking like this? Uh, it's her butt. I mean, you know, it's once in a while. Told you it was the same. And what do you think about her going out there and slapping flaps behind your back while you're not going out there and having any fun? He has full consent. Stop. I'm having fun. I'm getting briskets and barbecue. Wait, that's unrelated.

40:45That's unrelated. Oh, it's not related? All right. Bye, honey. She's fucking pussy and you're not. Yeah, we've been known about this. Yes, I'm trying to get... Stop talking for him, you domineering... Dude, I'm trying to understand his opinion from his mouth. All right, talk to him. She's going out there and f***ing women. You're not. Well, I mean, you have higher sex drive than I do. Yeah, I do. That's the thing. Look, I'm a lot, well, yeah, I'm a lot older than her, so. How old are you? I understand it when I was young. Is different, yeah. How old are you? I am 34. Oh, f***. Yeah. That is actually a pretty decent gap.

41:31That is kind of crazy. So he understands, and he is allowed to go with other women. He just doesn't have the... I know that. Stop talking for him, you... I'm talking for myself. I'm asking his opinion on it, you tit. My goodness. And then finally, final question. She wants to send your damn kid off to, you know, one of the... Back to NAMM. One of the areas. Oh, Vietnam, that's right. Back to NAMM. For four years? You're not going to see your kid for four years? We're going to visit. Other than a few trips? yeah you're okay with this fine oh yeah of course that was our ideas actually we talked about it it makes more sense it makes more sense it makes a lot more sense because it takes both of us to work and then make money and i want my kids to have um like a vietnamese palate when he grow up Vietnamese what when he grows up?

42:25Like a pallet. Like when he eats foods, he wants... Make him Vietnamese food. That's right. He does... He's not too picky on what he eats, and he eats more local stuff. Make him that food then. We will when he comes here. If that's his entire reason for sending the kid overseas... No. There's a lot more things in Vietnam that we don't have in New Jersey. New Jersey have... Asian food, but it's not very, there's not a lot of - Our entire reason for separating a kid during their imprinting years for four years is so that they can stand - Such a big deal. What about people who are adopted, Caleb?

43:06So those babies, like say they get adopted at four. Yes. They're going to love their new parents just as equally. Yes, but it's always complicated either way. Adopted is something the kid did not choose. The parents hardly chose really. It's usually emergencies. There's a lot going on. I don't think anyone advocates for wanting the kid to be in a position where they have to get adopted. You are choosing this for your own child. Yeah. It is very different. So you can't compare it to adopting. So the entire reason we're sending the kid overseas to a developing country, let's be very clear, is so they can accept spicier food when they get back?

43:46That's one way to put it, but it's... Listen, he's more connected to his culture over there. We have a little resource there to make the kids up. Yeah. Wow, we should have dropped the nuke. My goodness. Yikes. This is very weird. Okay. And he actually was the one that brought it up. So, you know, the idea of doing that. And I thought like, wow, this is awesome. So, yeah. Anyways. We'll call him back in the post show and talk about more things regarding this conversation. What? I really wanted to get into the finances. What do you have? And why does it have a stain? This is a reused bag. This is actually from a thrift store, and they collected other bags from other places.

44:28Yes, you're very unique. Okay, well, that one's actually cute. I made it. I made the other one too. You threw it on the floor. This one took two weeks. Well, the other one was shit. This episode is brought to you by Indeed. Stop waiting around for the perfect candidate. Instead, use Indeed-sponsored jobs to find the right people with the right skills fast. It's a simple way to make sure your listing is the first candidate C. According to Indeed data, sponsored jobs have four times more applicants than non-sponsored jobs. So go build your dream team today with Indeed. Get a$75 sponsored job credit at indeed.com slash podcast.

45:02Terms and conditions apply. But this one is kind of fine. I embroidered. People bring things on the show all the time and usually pisses me off. I hate this episode. I hate this episode. I hate this episode. That's actually kind of nice. That's kind of nice. I like crafts. I like making crafts. Well, thank you. I appreciate it. I will accept this gift. This is the very first gift other than the one from the governor of Michigan that I will actually accept. Oh, yeah. Thank you. It is cute. I accept it. It will be in my office. Is your credit cards good? Yeah, they are. Your family hated it? In the post show, you did reveal that you were still receiving money from a client from your stripping days.

45:41Are you still receiving money from him? I'm a very patient person. My mom is disabled. I've been taught patience. My family hated it. Should we get into that? I would love for you to just use your words and not shut down to the point to where I do yell. Said that I would pay for the gun that we bought on your card. So, are you safe, Pixie?

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46:47Type in code Caleb. What do you think? Just yours. Because again, this is just your finances, but it is interesting to learn about the household, especially since, I mean, I had a note that you guys are planning on combining finances soon, but you guys haven't really talked about money very much. I don't have any money to put aside to combine with him. Well, income and bills and stuff. And also, I want your advice. I want your advice on this. So should I wait to get married? then combine or do it beforehand? Well, we'll talk about that in a bit. I need to start getting these documents because also the context around these documents is going to help answer that question by the end.

47:18But regardless, what do you think your financial score is? Zero to 10, zero being the worst, 10 being the best. It's hard. I always ask myself that when I watch an episode. And what do you answer when you ask yourself that? Because that's what I would like. I always leave myself hanging. Like a three. Okay. If you want your Hammer financial score, see where you stand in the world of money. It is free at calebhammer.com. Can we get a lesbian financial score? Can we get that lesbian financial score? Maybe later if you're good. Just takes a few minutes. See where you stand in the world of money. See where you need to improve what you need to improve and where you're already doing well.

47:58Again, that is free at calebhammer.com. And if you don't want to be like a guess who ends up on this show, one, let your tits either point this way or this way. This way, ah, don't do that. It is quite odd, I'll be honest. And also download the DollarWise budgeting app. It is free to start your trial. See if you like it. Join the tens of thousands of other active users who are changing their lives using a budgeting app that caters to you instead of forcing you to do shit like all the other ones out there. It is pretty damn great. Take your free trial, DollarWise.app. And if you like it, you can sign up for the annual version like most people actually do because it saves a lot of money.

48:31And when you do, for the next month only, because I'm assuming this is coming out in January, February, about the next month, get this. My budget friend, the cookbook, signed by me, mailed directly to you, and then it's going away forever at the end of February. So. Out of print? This is time to move on. Fair enough. We'll have done that for about a year. Time to move on. People who got it, got it. People who didn't, rip. Rip. Okay. All right. Sapphire preferred. What's going on, lady? So this card, I actually put my body modifications on there. What does that mean? That's not pain. Plastic surgery.

49:13The beginning of it. It's a process. And piercings. What have you done? Plastic surgery. I had. You're making it sound like a lot. No, just one. Just this one. I removed the extra flap, you know. Did you lose a lot of weight? I did. But. That's good. I need to lose more before I can do the other surgeries. You want to do more things? Yeah. Yeah. I want to get that. Is skin removal plastic surgery? Yeah. Okay. Yeah. It is. What else are you trying to do? Like that mommy makeover. You know, like tuck it in. Tuck that in. Tummy tuck. Tummy tuck in layman's terms. Mommy makeover because usually they get birth.

49:54You just got fat. There we go. That mommy makeover. It's always been this way. I've been like the same way my whole life. Well, that's not good. Well, I mean, at least it hasn't blown up. Well, it already did. No, it's been the same the whole time. No, you were not born. Well, I was the same when I was 10 that I am now. So either way. Yeah, sure. When I blow up. Okay. Anyways, piercings. I have three tattoos. Those are on there. Oh, for fuck's sake. Yeah. Those aren't fake? What are fake? Those aren't fake? Why wouldn't they be? No, they're not. When you say plastic surgery, I assume we're like, I want to get them adjusted because obviously they're pointing out.

50:34Adjusted in what way? Make them smaller. Okay, reduction. Yes, desperately because my back constantly hurts. That's why I wear this corset because it actually keeps like my back from like putting all the weight onto a bra. Sure. Yeah, yeah. How much is that going to cost? So I may qualify for a reduction with my insurance. Oh, and getting your tubes tied, you said. That's going to cost money. No, it's covered in my insurance as birth control. Okay, that's good. I have to pay 20 % so it's like$300. Oh, he's saying nipple piercings too. Oh, eventually. Nipple piercings were already done or weren't done?

51:03No, no, no. I want to fix these, make them smaller, make them perkier, and then do the nipple piercings when they're healed. Those guys hang low? Huh? They hang low? No. They hang low? No, it's just like— That's good. Yeah, thankfully. I mean, I got that going for me that they're, you know, but it's the size is too much. I'm a 33— It means nothing to me. I don't know. 38 triple D. Still means nothing to me. Triple D, yeah. Okay. It's an issue. It's an issue. It hurts. I dream of body modification since you've been eight? Yes, since I've been eight. Is that not weird? My first dream was to get my septum piercing.

51:35At eight, I saw the Tom and Jerry cartoon in the bowl that had the septum piercing. And I was like, that. And then. What are we doing to our youth? Okay. It all started with the piercing. And then like the way I envision it, you know, like you're a Sims character. You're just doing what I mean in a less extreme sense. Like you want to work out to look a certain way or you're going to like max out. Like, oh, I'm doing like I'm going to read. Okay, what are we all trying to do and what is it all going to cost? Because you've already accumulated$5 ,991.41 on here. So what is this all going to cost?

52:08For my tummy tuck and boob lift? Yeah, everything, yes, that you're trying to do. So the boob lift or, well, that's again, I don't know if I'm going to get it covered by insurance. If I pay out of pockets,$15 ,000. Oh, for which one? For both? For both, yes. Both individually or together? Together. Okay. Not a uniboob, but just like, you know. No, no, no. But you said the mommy thing as well. Oh, no, no, no. Mommy's like closer to 20, 25, 30. And it's not that I don't want you to get it. You can get things. And I'd like to get, so my priorities. Oh, you're trying to convince your insurance that boobs have caused scoliosis.

52:43To have it covered by insurance. I forgot I said that already. I do, I do actually have a, I did. I forgot I said that. I do have a slight misalignment. Oh, he knows everything. They know more about you than you do. I have a slight misalignment. You know, not up here. Actually, it's all throughout. but yes but it might get covered by insurance but the thing is like you know i'm probably not going to be able to i want i don't want to do the boobs until i can do the tummy and i need to lose the weight i've been working out so we need to get 35 000 ready to go after a wedding of which is going to be 40 no it's before the wedding i want to get it done before the wedding hold on wait what did you say your wedding will cost the wedding's going to be well i'm splitting No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

53:2250. Okay, 50 plus. On the high end, on the high end. It's going to be. It always goes up. That's why. Weddings always go over, so let's just assume that. Currently, it's at 30. Oh, okay. Listen, plus 35 that you have to get done before the wedding for boob? No, not boob. Tummy. I just want tummy. Just tummy before, but that's 20. Because boobs, you can put in bras, you can put in a corset. That's 20, though. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know how realistic it is, though. You know? How bad's the tummy? It's not bad, but I just... We'll see in the post show. Tummy reveal in the post show? No, thank you. I'll reveal mine.

53:56Okay. That's up to you. The wedding is next year, 2026, October. Yes, when? Okay. Okay, answer that. Are we coming up with all this money while keeping care of our necessities and trying to pay off our debt? Because, again, you still owe on the arm flaps. Almost done with it, though. No. Well,$5 ,000 is not even. What the f***? You purchased$11 ,022? That's the arm. Wait, what the f***? How was the, okay. That just happened then. Yeah, it was in September. How long does this take to pay off if you only make your minimum payments and you don't purchase? And we already know you plan on purchasing these other body modifications.

54:29So how much? Three years? Yeah, 17. Years? Yes. This is why I said you're starting your marriage like this. And that's why I was concerned because this was the first thing on my document. And once I saw that, I was like, okay, so what's our plan for raising this kid? it's not gonna happen anytime soon we have to get money we have to get like a house but oh my gosh see this is where everything's broken because you have to do 20 for the belly before marriage and then we got to do 50 for the marriage stop for a second stop for a second 50 for marriage and then we have to somehow pay off all our debts we got to rebuild an emergency fund i guess a honeymoon too sure and then we're doing our titties and then we're doing even more shit and then we're a house and then we're getting a kid.

55:11Yet even just to pay off his debt, it'll take 17 years. So the kid, what are we having them? A 60? Like this doesn't make any sense. No, no, no. None of these things make sense. He wants it to. You don't. I think you're honestly using your finances is allowing it to get f***ed as a way to not have a kid. No, I just have other priorities. Yeah. You having fun and enjoying life when he wants to start a family. Are you sure you guys are a match? Yes, we are. And that's why we... Family is a big part of the conversation. Yeah, I know. And it sounds like he wants to and you do not. No, I do want a kid, but I'd like to get my stuff done.

55:44But, you know, I do want a kid. I do. You're not showing that in your behavior and priorities. No, I'm 24 years old and I'd rather do other things than think about that. Right, but he's 34 and you guys are also getting married. Yes, I know. We've been together for like seven years, so, you know.

56:04Not the girl math. Oh, no.

56:09six years, six years. There you go. 2019, 2019. Yeah, big correction. It is a big correction. Because at that point, he was a 27-year-old dating a 17-year-old. No, he was 28. I was 18. Interesting last-minute correction. Well, my brain farts. On camera? Caleb, I don't know what to tell you. Uh-huh. My brain's not very high-functioning in the frontal lobe area, clearly. I don't think New Jersey is a big fan of that. Actually. It depends on the state. It does, but you'd be surprised. It's kind of disappointing in New Jersey. It's kind of low. It's weird. Age of consent in New Jersey.

56:50Okay, dude, it's a black screen. I can't see shit. Why is my brightness... What the fuck is happening? Apple Watch? Hello? Age of consent in New Jersey. Yep. I found this on the... Okay, I'm 16. Yeah. It's disappointing. He got lucky. But the thing is, he didn't know how young I was. He didn't know how young I was because it was a blind date. Yeah, that part's fine until he then does know. Well, no. I was 18, so it was no problem. In correction territory, you were 18. I just had a brain fart, okay? Is that really so hard to believe? Yes. In this whole conversation, that's the hardest thing to believe.

57:28Anyways. Yeah. Minimally payment,$59. Listen, that within itself is not a make or break for your entire life, but the reality is this is taking so long to pay off. I don't think you want kids. I think you're using this as a way to not get them. I think you're manipulating that conversation. And you say you're going to a honeymoon, so we have to put that in as well. Better be cheap. Where are you going? Japan. We're going to Japan. What are we doing? Well, it's not even where he's from. Two, it's... No way. We've been to Vietnam. We've been to Japan. We want to go back to Japan. He actually brought it up.

58:00He wants to go to the northern part of Japan this time. Okay. Listen. Yeah, it garners plastic surgery. Then you also went to the pharmacy a few times. One costs$2.15 and then the other one$3.8. $2.15? And gas as well. You got to, yeah, I guess you got to get gas to drive to the plastic surgery. Yeah. And work. I mean, you spent a lot at CVS Pharmacy. I do. Medications. And I do get... lot of them. Yeah. The transition? The transition. Mentally, spiritually, the transition from life to death one day. Listen, obviously an undercard person can use the Fizz card, debit card that builds credit. I don't trust you for anything else.

58:35I'll get him as well, your adult husband, fiancé a course career certification so you can get back in the job market. A lot of people in the audience have used it to get raises or a better job. Yeah. And there is a lot of tech version certifications on Corsac. So I'll get them hooked up on that. Awesome. Thank you. Absolutely. Chase freedom card. What's going on? So that's kind of like my everything card for travel for. Why do you get to travel? Why do you spend money on traveling? If you're trying to pay off debt, if you're trying to get these plastic surgeries, if we're trying to get married, if we're trying to go to Japan, if we're trying to have a kid, can you do that shit?

59:10Lower the blood pressure. It was before the debt actually happened. This was before I got proposed to before the ring, before the Fire Nation attacked. Okay. But anyways, so January, I went to Scotland for the weekend. Just January? No, February, February. You're making it sound like an eternity ago. So you just went to Scotland a month before engagement. So f*** off. No, like three months before engagement. I didn't know it was happening. You went to Scotland? I went to Scotland to go see Dan and Phil. What? Do you know Dan and Phil? No. All right. That's why I said what? They're YouTubers. Dan and Phil are my dads.

59:43Oh. Not you looking it up. Of course I'm going to look it up. The gays? The twinks, yeah. Oh, I recognize their faces. Yeah, you do. What is it? Dan, not Dane. Dane and fall. I mean, yeah. No, it says Dane and Phil, right? No, it says Dan. Dan and Phil. Dan, but you said Dan. I think I might be able to help with a Pan Pam dilemma. Yeah, that'd be great. Pam. Colton was right. You can't read. He said that you're not going to be able to read the hat, and it's right. It's difficult to read. He clocked you. No, that is difficult to read. Okay. They still upload anything? So it's a gay couple vlog?

1:00:19Right? I don't know. They get a lot of views. Good for them. Yeah. Been around a long time. I wouldn't say it's... You probably watched them in your youth when you were, like, struggling. Listen. I did watch them. Yeah. They were in on YouTube in 2006 and 2007. 6, 7. All right. But anyway. Yeah, no. They've been around for a while. And I've been following them. Oh, my gosh. They make so much money. They do so well. This is crazy. People like me. Going around vlogging and making a shit ton of money. That's not their, that's like their last few videos since they came out as a couple before they were.

1:00:50I thought, have they not been gay forever? They have, but they haven't released that knowledge to the public. It became known to the world in October. I'm assuming everybody knew and it was just confirmed. That's insensitive. You know why? Why? Because it's not our right to be like, oh, we know, oh, we've been new. No, we've been new. Yeah, but. I recognize their faces. I thought they were always gay together. Well, can they be gay separately instead of gay collaboratively? No, because also gay men. We know gay men. Colton, we know gay men. Gay men are great. I thought, I thought, I told the story.

1:01:26For the longest time, they were roommates. They were, you know, they were just gay in the same household. But that was the story. No, there is a reality with gay men. They have been together since 2009. There's a reality with gay men and we love them for it. gay men who are friends, who are co-workers, who are anything. Oh, they f***ed. Well, they, yeah. But it wasn't our place to discuss. Or our enemy, says Colton. Not our place. It's my place to say whatever the f*** I want. Welcome to the world. All right. Yeah, I mean, that's your opinion. Sure, you might get arrested where they live for it, but here.

1:01:59In England? Yes. Everyone's getting arrested for shit they post online and things they say. Oh, I didn't know that. Absolutely. I mean, their content's very old. Okay. No, I'm not saying their content's bad, but we all know. Come on. Any gay men that know each other, stick it in. That's it. I'm going to let that sit in silence and let it speak for itself. I mean, I'm a sub-war. Yes, exactly. They do. This is a known thing. Thank you for generalizing every gay man on the planet. You're welcome. I mean, that's absolutely. They will agree. They will agree. The gays, get in chat. They will agree. Absolutely.

1:02:35I'm sure anecdotally, you know. I thought in late high school and early college that I was bi. Turns out, no. It's just men. I'm sorry, Colton. So no little gay boy. No, it's just tits are so good. I don't know. I mean, I can't relate. I think it was because of me at first in late middle school. Okay. But anyway, I am a ride or die for Dana. But either way, because of that, I've known gay people and every gay guy, every gay guy, no matter what, in school, works, get friends. I'm sure people are sexually active. I just don't know if it's like, you know, it has to be like, oh, there's a gay person five miles away.

1:03:12Like, I have to them. Like, no. Again, you can't generalize people. There are definitely people like that for sure. But you can't generalize. Yes, you can. That is. That's not a bad thing. Clip that. You can generalize. Gay people have to each other if they're within a 3.5 mile. Unless they're fat or black. Anyway, the reason I brought it up is because I went to go to Scotland to go see them. Right. I forgot why we went down that rabbit hole. Yeah. I was trying to pivot. But anyway, the reason is I had an opportunity to do the VIP golden experience. Not the shower. Just the golden meet and greet.

1:03:49How much did this cost? Well, they're not into you. No. And I'm not into them. They're just like, no, seriously. Listen, do you know what their target audience is? Gays. Women. Lesbians. Say it out loud for the crowd. Lesbians and bisexuals. and trans men and they're they're you know like we love them we love them it's just like it's just wholesome comfort watching i won't get into their content because you probably don't care but you know to the people who do care oh yeah you are okay so congratulations how much does this golden shower cost uh 350 for the ticket 350 uh for that's not bad but then you had to get a lot of travel and stuff i mean it's expensive but guess how much i mean it was 800 round three years to pay this off, but that's not even what's happening.

1:04:33Listen, it's a beauty shop. Not really helping. And then Gemsy Split, Passivize Plus, Paris Baguette, Passiac Thrift. Oh, the Passiac Thrift. Love the thrift. I'm sure you do. You don't have money. You went and got some bullshit. What are you stopping in the gas station and getting some bullshit? Which gas station? I don't know. Stop and Shop. Stop and Shop is a grocery store. What are you getting for just a few bucks? It's usually bullshit when it's just a few bucks. So I do daily groceries. Like I'll go and get like a couple items. So you can make food for this child. We make our own food. And why are you so obsessed with us having the child in the house?

1:05:09Like, oh, come on. It is. It is going to be weird. The imprinting years and then taking them away from the person that raised them. Yeah, that's your opinion. What? That's your opinion. If you think the imprinting years. Let us know. Yeah. Okay. But yeah, no, we, we cook every day. So, you know, little, little, yeah. Stop and shop's not a gas station. Okay. That's fine. I hope you cook every day. because then you went to barbecue chicken as well. Immediately. Barbecue chicken. That same day for$41.58. Oh, that is for the, we were making curry. So I had to get potatoes and the barbecue chicken.

1:05:39We get the chicken and then we just put it on the curry. But we found a better alternative. We go to Costco and they have this barbecue Korean air fried chicken. So we use that now. But before, when we had curry night, we would buy the chicken already done. On a monthly basis. What do you think was spent last month? What was your outflow? We know your inflow. No, just yours. Because we don't see his spending. and we're not going to, and that's fine. Right. Well, what's the outflow? Of which month? Last. The statements you have? Statements I have, yes. September? When you submitted for the show, you tit.

1:06:08September. Sure. What was your outflow? Oh. September was so expensive. Yes, it was. I'm going to let you know. Yes, it was. I did so much in September, so it's not my average. It's a win-win. You get money and I get money. These are called affiliates, and you get that sweet, sweet cash for signing up for some amazing products. The first one is Chime. This is a checking account that I personally use and you get up to a$350 bonus with a new Chime checking account and earn up to 3.5 % APY on your savings. And second, my investing app of choice these days is Webull and get a 2 % match on all of your money that you transfer over.

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1:07:24everything you need and nothing you don't. And when you download DollarWise today, you'll get six to try it for free, plus three months for just$9.99. So you can finally take control and see what your money's been doing behind your back. Click below to get started. Doesn't matter. Every month something pops up. Plus we know you're wanting to have more surgeries in the future anyway. It was$18 ,300.85. That's crazy. Die. Okay. At least I know where to go when I die. Just back to work. Okay, what is this Japanese trip going to cost not that long from now in under a year? I haven't looked into it.

1:08:00I don't know how we're going to... You haven't even started looking. No, because I have other things to plan for. You have over 100 ,000 hours of planned expenses next year. The honeymoon is not a priority. The wedding is a priority. No, no, no, no. To be clear, you have over 100 ,000 hours of planned expenses already for next year alone. Yes. I don't know how you're going to do that. You don't make that. And he is not... He doesn't have a job. We don't know yet, you know. He makes 35 a month, but we need to see what else. Of which he needs to set at least 30 % aside for taxes. Is he doing that?

1:08:25Yes, he is. He's pretty good. He has a good savings, but we don't touch that, obviously. Better not. And I have a good retirement, so I got something going for me. What's considered a good retirement? I have 20 ,000. Okay, that's... For 24? Okay, I could accept that, yeah. Yeah. Okay, let's keep going. What is this, Klarna? Klarna. Pull out your Klarna. It might not unlock with this makeup, to be so for real. Code and passwords also exist. Do I remember my passwords? Like, okay, let's see. You remember all your passwords? I have LastPass. LastPass? I don't know. Oh, my gosh. How have you survived?

1:09:02Oh, yeah, Ticketmaster in July. I forgot what that one was for. Here, look at it. Or not. Oh, Dan and Phil. Oh, there it is. I was like, which one's this? Bruh, pull it up. It's here. It's already here. Show me. You f***ing bitch. I had it right there. You didn't grab it. Ticket master, ticket master. What's all this? So every time I do Klarna, it's usually for an event. But you go to events constantly, right? Concerts. So how are you planning to afford any and all of this? Well, obviously I'm not going to go on any concerts. No, obviously it's just debt. Yeah, but that's paid off at least. I have to save for the wedding.

1:09:38And then pull up Amazon. I see Amazon in here as well. Pull up your Amazon app. So Christmas is coming up, you know. Let me pull it up. Mm-hmm. Well, actually, I am making most of the gifts this year. I did. It's coming. Orders? Just give me your Amazon, you f***er. Take it. My gosh, you're obnoxious.

1:09:58A few iPhone updates behind. It's always a little weird. Thank goodness, at least nothing in the card. That's rare. Okay. Odd socks. Yep, we need that instead of actually paying for our wedding. So the first three things. Couture's diamond dazzled bullshit. My coworker just got engaged. That's what we need. Rated M shirt. That's what we need instead of a wedding I know what the f*** it is you dumb c*** I'm saying you don't need it instead of a wedding It's a gift you dingus Yeah gift yourself a wedding you f*** Okay don't get anything Christmas Shut the f*** up Susie Yeah if you can't afford it correct Handheld cordless Shut the f*** up cordless bullshit What is it a laser bullshit Binan neutral setting powder F*** off Makeup skin prep f*** off Binan clown white makeup Yep, f*** off.

1:10:45There, that's that clown white. Yeah, and it's gross. Thank you. Women's coloring book, f*** off. How about a woman's wedding? Oh, that's what my grandma. Spanish Bible words. This episode is brought to you by Venmo. With the Venmo debit card, a taco in one hand, and ordering a ride in the other means you're stacking your rewards. Nice. Get up to 5 % cash back with Venmo Stash on your favorite brands when you pay with your Venmo debit card. Pick a bundle with your go-tos and start earning cash back. Do more stash, get more cash. Visit Venmo.com to learn more. Venmo-bundle terms and exclusions apply.

1:11:18See terms at Venmo.me-terms. Max$100 cash back per month. Search for my grandma. I don't care about who it's for. Get them a nice wedding that they're going to. Shut the fuck up. I can spare it. No, you literally can. Yes, I can. It's$10. I can spare it for my grandma. $10,$10,$10,$10,$10. You spent$16 ,000 last month. It all,$18 ,000. It all stacks up. You fuck, dude. It was a very. Clothing hang. Shut the fuck up. Shut up. It was a special month. Pride Adhesive Island. Shut up. Oh, my goodness. Oh, that's the surgery, like the Hibiclens and, yeah. Healthcare, hibiscus, bullshit, M, pride, antibiotic, bacterium.

1:11:51Yeah, that's for the surgery prep. I mean, surgery post. Oh, my gosh. Yeah. You're just spending all this money you do not have. Money you do not have. I had it at the time. What? Grandma sleeps on an air mattress in your bedroom? So you're getting her that instead of a fucking mattress? It tastes like... Wait, wait, no. Roll it back. No, I have a one-bedroom. We have a one-bedroom apartment. We don't have another room. Yeah, I'm saying you could contribute to her having an apartment. She has an apartment in Peru. She visits. Oh. She visits months at a time, you know, for doctor's appointments.

1:12:23And she stays with us rather than my dad's. Oh, how much did you pay to go see Sabrina on Halloween? Oh, yeah. I kind of regret that, not going to lie. Drew Barrymore was there. It was all right. I mean, I probably - How much did you spend? $900. How many of you? I bought them in May before I got proposed to. So I didn't know the, I should have sold the tickets in hindsight. I mean, it was fun though. It was a fun night. Would I do it again? No, but it was fun. Great. No regrets. No learning opportunities. That's wonderful. Oh, I said I wouldn't do it again. The freedom card I forgot to say. $1 ,255.94.

1:12:58Minimum fee payment,$40. Okay. And that's the Discover card. Is there a balance on here? It looks like it's paid off. Yeah. There's nothing currently. Dunkin' Donuts, Golf Mart, Hyatt. This is bullshit, bullshit, bullshit. card. Yeah. Because I get cashed back on that. It's the bullshit. Great. This is bullshit. You have other debt to pay off. No more bullshit, you stupid. Okay. So here's the jewelry. Yes. What is this? Oh, total limit. Oh, what am I reading here? Oh, that's my... You got insurance for your jewelry. Oh, yeah. Deductible of$1 ,000. So how often do you owe this? Once a year, it's like$5 something.

1:13:33$580. And a commercial island marine coverage? What? Commercial island marine coverage. $591. owed at Inception. It's Gem Shield is the name of, I don't know what, yeah, I couldn't tell you. So it's not a debt, but. No, it's not a debt. It's, you know, an expense. You have two credit cards. That's pretty much it. Two credit card debts. That's it. Yeah. No other debt. I thought you owed on the ring. Yeah, that's a split it. It's kind of like Klarna, but zero percent. I don't have it. Send your statements. Listen to instructions. No, there is no statement on their website. How much do you owe still?

1:14:06I owe$7 ,000. Oh, what's your minimum monthly? $1 ,035. And that goes on the Freedom Card. And it's 0 % APR. You pay your debt with a debt. Well, they won't accept debit. In order to qualify to use the payment installments, you need to put it on a credit card. Is there an interest rate? For my credit card? For your ring debt. No, 0. 0 % interest. Forever? No, 12 months. So I basically took a loan on$12 ,000 for the remaining. Your checking account started at literally$70. Yeah. That's terrifying. Yeah. Yeah, definitely. Ended with$487. Moneygram, what's that? Went to$175 to Moneygram. Moneygram.

1:14:53Moneygram. Moneygram. Moneygram, what the fuck is this? So I do send money overseas. Not my money. To who? It's like I don't want to obviously plug or spawn anything, but it's a like a cat rescue um in turkey overseas yeah to turkey to turkey well there's a lot of it just happened like not too well well two years ago i guess um so i used to just donate okay then let me explain this is hundreds of months of turkey cats yeah but not my money i so in turkey you paypal is not allowed or they can't use paypal so they use my paypal to receive donations and I money gram it to them right after. Who? I don't want to plug them, you know?

1:15:36What's the relationship-ish? Huh? What's the relationship-ish? We are friends. We FaceTime and I see, like, obviously it's not a scam. I see the cats are taken care of. Oh, wait, hold on, hold on, hold on. Have you met this person? No, I haven't been to Turkey. Caleb, I'm not sending the money. It's just going through my account. Yeah, until one time they ramp you up from trust and then it's thousands and then you're f***ing you up from. They ramp you up with trust, and then all of a sudden they ask for thousands. They're like, wait, I can't do it. But you trust them because of these months. How long have you been doing it?

1:16:06Two years. Yeah, so, well, they could. It could be a scam in the end. We don't know. No. It's risky. Well, you're saying no. That's great. I'm wonderful. Ooh, I trust that. Okay, well, you don't have to, but I don't send my own money. I've just let them use my PayPal. So what happens the day that they ask you to send, and they're like, oh, shit, it didn't clear it. I'll reimburse here in a few days. I don't. Would you just not? I wouldn't. Good. At least you wouldn't. No, I wouldn't. What is the IRS going to see this as? I'm very scared. I am very scared to see. Because this year was the first year it was a lot of donations.

1:16:38So it's ramping. Well, no, it actually is declining now. How much has it been? I don't want to say. Just because I don't know if the IRS is. I mean, they already know, obviously, but I don't want to clock it. And you do penny for penny. Yeah. I don't keep any of the money. It's blood money if you do. So I just want all the money to go to the Cats. I actually volunteer in New Jersey at a cat rescue. So I do already do volunteer work. Great. I just ended up. That's not what this is about. We're not jerking each other off. I'm more concerned about the fact that you might owe tax money. Yeah, I probably am.

1:17:07And then once that happens, once I find out. Well, the IRS already knows. Why don't you just tell us how much? I don't want to. I don't want to. You don't have to. I'm just. Yeah. But why? I'm just nervous. Like, you know, I know they know. But like at the same time, it's a lot of, you know. But ever since she got injured, less donations happened. How'd this person find you? No, I found them. I followed them. I follow like, you know, different cat pages and stuff on Instagram. And I found them and I'm, initially I donated like, you know,$5,$10,$15, you know, whatever. So you were giving your own money.

1:17:37Yeah, but that was like three, four years ago before things. So you got like 20? Yeah. I mean, I always donate. I mean, for cats. No, donate is good, but donate to your marriage. You literally have 100. I wasn't, there wasn't a thing back then. I don't think you understand that you have 100 ,000 hours of planned expenses next year. he does not have a job and you don't make that much. Certainly not net, not even close. And you spent literally$10 ,000 more than came in the most previous month. Yes, yes. And you had a high income earning month because money was coming in from other people. So other than that, compared to a normal month, you spent way, like what, 13, 14 ,000 more than you bring in?

1:18:17Yeah, no, it's crazy. What the fuck are we doing? Well, okay, let me give you the logic. Except you did. Do you want to know why? In a second. in a second, but you did do that. So I don't care if you never do that. You did do it. You're starting the snowball in the bad direction. You say, oh, I didn't have that before this all started this year. But it doesn't matter. Now you have two credit cards. You have a ring debt. And that month was high spending. And we already know for a fact there are multiple months coming up next year with Japan, with the wedding, with the tummy tuck, with eventually the titty titty.

1:18:42With everything that you are planning to spend tens of thousands of dollars you do not have. This is a snowball that is going to end to a place that is a complete disaster. Not only harm your relationship, but potentially harm this future child as well and harm yourself. Like, what are we doing? I don't think you understand the actual, actual impact this has and the dangerous, the dangerous alarm bells that are ringing due to what you have done so far and what is planned in the future. But go ahead. Tell me your logic. For the spending in September? You said you had logic you wanted to tell me.

1:19:13Okay, so the reason I got the plastic surgery for the skin removal is because it was on sale. Oh, well, I'm being, that's a hyperbole. So the plastic surgery has a down season. It was like in the summertime, they're less, they're not really that booked and busy because all the girlies are out on the beach or whatever. So it was$2 ,000 less than what it normally is. So that's. I'm not saying I didn't want you to do it, but look what it's leading to. I'm just telling you why. So the arm thing was$13 ,000 instead of$15 ,000. So, yeah, that's why I did it. I put like 23 down and then that was the 11 left over or nine left over.

1:19:53Yeah, but it's almost done. The thing is I do need your advice on, you know, building up the savings. So what I've been doing. That's impossible if you have 100 ,000 hours of expenses planned next year. That's impossible. We have to save for that. We have to save for those expenses. Yeah, but that's already happening next year and you make less than that in one year and this year is done. So that's impossible. You can't save on a year where there's 40 ,000 more expenses than comments comes in net. So there's no saving. That's not, that's impossible. Well, no savings. They would just be paying out.

1:20:22But that's still impossible if you owe 40 more than you make. Well, I'm not by myself again. I know, but he doesn't have a job. This day trading thing, who knows? Maybe he's been lucky for a couple months. Sure, that's great. It's been a while. Yeah. A little while. He got laid off in July. It's not that crazy. But he's been trading before then. It was his side hustle. who knows what his taxes are going to look like when he's bringing in this much money, plus also collecting unemployment and not saying he's claiming this amount of money. And who knows what things are going to look like. he might owe some of it back.

1:20:45Who knows? Well, worse comes to worse, we could push the wedding back. You know, we do have time to check. You booked the venue. Yes, but they're flexible. Are people booking travel yet? Travel to get there? It's just drive. Just drive. People aren't coming from Peru or Vietnam. No, no, no, no, no. No, it's just going to be small. 70 people. 70 to 80 people. 70's small? Yeah. Lindsay? It is small. 70 is considered small? Yeah. Okay. I thought that was like midsize. No. It's so expensive to have a wedding. It is, yes. That's why we're trying. We're trying to, you know, keep it on the down low, you know.

1:21:17Okay, so MoneyGram. Chewy. Chewy's usually okay. Yeah. MoneyGram, Karen Cunningham. Oh, that was a t-shirt. More important than the wedding. Sure. MoneyGram, plastic surgery,$2 ,600. $2 ,600. That was the down payment for the arm surgery. Oh, for fuck's sake. Then the rest was on the credit card? Yes. The rest was on the credit card. Did you open the credit card for it? No. It's been existing. Why did you have to do a down payment in a checking account then? In checking? Well, yes, this is checking. I thought we were looking at, oh. Oh, yeah, I just paid that out of my own money, like the down payment, and then the rest was on the credit card.

1:21:58Okay, Kumo. Looks like a restaurant,$40.99. Zellie not$150, probably to the boyfriend because he makes no money. No, no, no, we pay bills together. $40, ATM withdrawal, who knows where the f*** that went. Panera Bread, Saigon Bistro. Moneygram again That was like a$10 at Saigon Bistro I think Zelling out$25 What? Vietnamese iced coffee I'm just thinking Vietnamese coffee is wonderful It's so good It makes me shit my brains out But now we make it at home We make it at home now That's good Yeah we do You should make your coffee at home and you should make your energy drinks at home So make sure you get that Gamersupps free samples by going to gamersupps.gg and typing in code Caleb Hammer See what flavors you like and then once you decide you get the get them yourself it's 40 cents a serving make your energy drinks at home they taste better They are better.

1:22:41You can have more of it. You can have the hydration version like a Gatorade as well if you don't want the caffeine. So do that just like making your coffee home. So I'm glad you're starting to make them at home. Yes. Pet Smart Apple Bill Stop and Shop$4.57. Probably an energy drink. Stop and Shop is groceries. $4.57? I buy like sometimes I'll go in and just buy a thing of potatoes. What do we have like 500 hours of money gram? Yeah. And again, not my money. I know. I know. But it is still out and coming in, coming out. And it also might be considered taxable. I don't know. We'll see. I don't know.

1:23:10I don't know. Mochi Hut. Monchi. Mochi. Monchin Hut. I just bought a donut. A mochi donut, probably. $10.77 a mochi donut? Yeah, it's expensive. Well, maybe don't do that then. Well, I don't do it. Yeah. ATM would draw$60. Mm-hmm. Gas. Manual DB Burke. Zellen out$175. Hmm. Okay,$3 ,000 in here. Is that still the same? What is that? More was taken out than put in this Chase savings. Oh, yeah. Yeah. So my savings at$700 right now. how the fuck is the savings dwindling that fast headed into the most expensive year of your life so far how things you know like oh great answer yeah what if you can't even recognize how are you gonna do next year if one is already unbudgetable it's just mathematically unless he brings in a great income and we don't even know what the expenses are outside of the hundred that's already planned.

1:24:08Family. Yeah, but we'll see. Yeah, but I'm not relying on them. I'd rather go into credit card debt than ask my family. But you're already dwindling savings. It started higher and then the month we had it even went lower and then you already brought it down to 700 from that three. And we know it was 15 at one point. 15 ,000. Shit. Yeah, but that was the ring and the surgery. Yes. That took it out a bit. The wants. Yes, I agree. I'd rather you do the surgery than the ring. You get to upgrade the ring eventually. What the fuck? No, I don't want to upgrade the ring. I'm happy with what I have. Want.

1:24:36Yeah. Need. Yeah. It's a want for sure. Exactly. And you've f***ed your entire life for it. $52 in this investing thing. Yes, you have. You've drained your emergency fund. If an emergency happens, you're done. Yeah, no. I agree with you there. $5 ,000 in this? I thought you said you had like$20 ,000. Oh, here we go. Okay,$15 ,000 in that 401k. So all together is$20 ,000. Yes. Understood. Yep. Sticky fingers. And then, oh,$10 ,000 in here. So$30 ,000? So$30 ,000 total then? That doesn't make sense. It should be$20 ,000. Okay. I have 15 in this 401k. Those are the same. Okay. So, okay, Tony. Yeah.

1:25:11Yeah, that's the same one. Okay. Well, I mean, I know I can budget you living month to month. That's not the issue. It's the wedding. But either way. Yeah, let's do that. Okay, so$5 ,486.43 hits on a monthly basis without the gram and all that bullshit happening. Your debt minimum payments are not that crazy, but let's get it. Your car is paid for? Yes, totally paid for. Okay, minimum fee debt payments, only temporarily because the ring will be done in like seven months, but$1 ,134. What's your portion of rent? I pay$1 ,550. Okay, for half, that is a little expensive, but I get it. And it's New Jersey.

1:25:51Sure, sure, sure. Utilities, water, gas, electric, insurance, internet, all combined, how much? So I pay the internet. It's$50. Okay. And then everything else is, he pays that. So he pays$15.50, I pay$15.50. I'm on a family plan. So you don't pay? No. When you do get helium, if T-Mobile's good in that area, and it should be for Jersey. Yeah. Right now, get up to 20 % off select online storage solutions. Put heavy-duty HDX totes to good use, protecting what's important to you. The solid, impact-resistant design prevents cracking. And the clear base and sides make items easy to find, even when the totes are stacked.

1:26:28Find select online shelving and tote storage up to 20 % off at the Home Depot to organize every room in your home, from your garage to your attic. Visit HomeDepot.com. How doers get more done. Gas, vroom, vroom, drive, drive. How much on a monthly basis? 60 bucks. That's how much car insurance? I pay every six months, so it's$689 a month. I mean, every six months. 681. It's pretty good, actually, for my age. Yeah, it is. Yeah. $113.50. Okay, you can contribute$300 to the food fund of the household. Yeah. Use the budget-friendly cookbook if you need to. A month? I think you guys are good on your own.

1:27:13You have to use the budget-friendly options, yes. Okay. Budget it out. You can get it in the budgeting class. It's tough in Jersey, man. Because my grandma— Okay, I'm going to be$350, but either way, we've proven it across the country. $350. Well, grandma. Do you have to pay for grandma? Yeah. Well, she stays with us most of the time. So we, on average... I'll do$400 and then he can contribute the rest. $400 again. Use the meal plan and the budgeting class. Use the cookbook if you need to. We've done it. $250 a person is what we can do. We round up to three. Well, listen, okay. But even still, we round up to three from the$250 that we prove quarterly basis you can do.

1:27:48We'll up it when we have to. But yeah, use that. We're going to put you through the Master Your Money program. That's where you get the debt class. You get the budget class. You get the investing class, the real estate class, the recession class, the job class, all the classes. You get them in all future classes, plus the premium version of the DollarWise budgeting app. You get it all in the Master of Money. You can go to CalebHammer.com, check it out for yourself. Great community in there as well. So be engaged with everyone in there. There are people that are paying off debt, building retirement, getting their first house.

1:28:14It's a great place to stay engaged. $100 for the TP fund you can contribute. Medical health care, co-pays, prescriptions, all this stuff. How much? Prescriptions a month, let's say 30 bucks. Oh, that's not bad. Gym? Is there a gym? It's free with the rent. Good. You said you have pets, right? Yes, I have a cat. Yeah. Okay,$50 for pet insurance. How much for cat food? So, put 70. She has special medical food. Okay. But it's every two months. So, 25. Yeah, that makes sense. Okay, anything else that needs to be in your budget that I have not put in? Obviously, we want to get to savings, but anything else I need to...

1:28:53No, I think that's, those are the living expenses. Well, again, minimum living you can do. That is not an issue that I have with you. It's a good rhyme. But what I am afraid of is, I have no idea how you're going to budget$100 ,000 of expenses next year. Even if the family chips in, it's going to be 100 % of your income at a minimum. And then we have these minimum monthly expenses to take care of just to survive on top of that. because to survive, yeah,$3 ,512.05 and$1 ,000 of that will be freed up in just a few months, seven months when you pay off that debt. So that's really, you know, it's good.

1:29:30And in retirement, it's not horrible. And let's call it$1 ,900 just to be conservative, you know, in case more has to go to the groceries. But$1 ,900, okay, that's what you have left over on a monthly basis. Yeah, I mean, obviously we need to pay off the, in the ring, yeah, minimum payment until it's paid off, but the freedom in Sapphire, we need to pay off because it's high interest and it's going to be accrued at like 30 % for a while. So you got to obliterate that. But even still, you either need to downsize the wedding or you need to push the wedding or you need to push the honeymoon or do something local or even no honeymoon.

1:30:02We have to make some sacrifices for next year. Because you can budget a life thing and that's not my concern. You need to sit down with this guy. My fiance. Yeah, over a nice cup of pho and you need to. Oh, yeah, for sure. He makes it so good at home. I love her. It's wonderful. So either way, you need to sit down and discuss the sacrifices you guys are willing to make for next year because you cannot afford everything you're trying to do. And you need to budget it out for once this debt is paid off, what you can do in a few months. What can we allocate 2 ,000 to 3 ,000 hours a month towards to get to savings by a certain date?

1:30:37And you guys need to choose what you're able to do and what you're not able to do and make those hard choices. I can't make those hard choices for you. But with those extra couple or 3 ,000 hours a month to throw towards whatever you want to do by a certain date, you will have to determine what those things are. Well, like I said earlier, the honeymoon could definitely be pushed back. That's obviously getting married is more important than going on a honeymoon. We could always do that another time. I am an advocate for making the wedding smaller. If it was his way, he'd have 130. I wanted 70 or actually I wanted 50.

1:31:07But, you know, he has a big family. So, I mean, it's kind of tough. We are cutting back on expenses for the actual wedding. It's going to be a buffet style, you know, just rustic barn kind of thing. But yeah, no, I mean, we're definitely trying to cut back on things. And I mean, I really appreciate the budget because it's something, you know, to adhere to. All right. Well, I'm going to call him back in the post show. Make sure you join Hammer Elite. But let's get that Hammer Financial score first. Spending in a budget, zero out of 10, you overspend. Debt? I mean, it's honestly, it's not horrendous, but there is some high interest debt there.

1:31:41and it is risk. Three out of 10. Emergency fund under a thousand. So zero out of 10. Retirement for your age, you're on track about to a seven out of 10. Not 100 % on track, but still very good start. Strong start. Seven out of 10. Real estate, not there yet. Zero out of 10. Hammer financial scores, two out of 10. It'll be quickly close to a five. Once you deal with this debt, get that eliminated and that'll be fine. Click that join button. We're going to call the fiance again and talk about this entirety of the situation, what they're willing to sacrifice on and send an extra 20 minutes to this episode, just like any other financial audit.

1:32:08So join the best membership on YouTube for a recent three premium shows posted every single day Monday through Friday All right, get him back on the phone I want to know your perspective on all the body modifications because it's draining the household of finances She has a hundred thousand dollars of expenses planned next year Uh, it's conserving at first, but like I said, she has a good job She's able to pay for all and stuff Yeah, but he doesn't Are you a cock? Join us Saturday, January 31st for Hammer Elite Day A five-hour live stream featuring all of your favorite shows, but done live with you.

1:32:40See you there. Rinse knows that greatness takes time, but so does laundry. So Rinse will take your laundry and hand deliver it to your door, expertly cleaned. And you can take the time pursuing your passions. Time once spent sorting and waiting, folding and cueing, now spent challenging and innovating and pushing your way to greatness. So pick up the Irish flute or those calligraphy pens or that daunting Beef Wellington recipe card and leave the laundry to us. Rinse. It's time to be great.