Vile Cheater Has Secret Pregnancy And Loses Everything | Financial Audit

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1:29Thanks for coming down from Kansas City. So what do we do for a living up there? I work. Am I allowed to say the deli name? I work at a deli. Yeah, a deli. Yeah, I work at a deli. Are you a meat cutter? We have meat cutters here sometimes. No, I'm a manager. So I kind of help run the whole thing. I'm in the kitchen. I'm up front. What do you make? $1850. $1850 as a manager. Okay. I guess that depends where. You know, I'm looking at the median lowest opening positions here in Austin, Texas. typically the mediums around 19 hours an hour obviously a more expensive city than kansas city missouri but you know how do you feel living on that in kansas city it's not it's not a lower paid city uh or you know it's not a lower cost of living city necessarily like it's still expensive it's not one of the highest ones but you know it requires money so how do you live i mean i'm doing okay um i feel like i'm i'm all right i mean i'm comfortable for the most part you know day to day um obviously i'm here for a reason though so yeah i mean there's bad decisions being made so so yeah i mean if you're living comfortably i don't think we'd be in collections meaning you didn't pay your bills so yeah just in general give us a little bit of context what is going on here so i got myself into a lot of debt a few years ago and I'm trying to get myself the past is following me I can't get away from my past what's your past so when I was 22 I met my now ex-husband before we ever ended up getting married we had some relationship issues I did the stupid started looking for that attention in other places actually madison style you could say uh so anyway i started seeing somebody uh okay really how long how long into the relationship it wasn't how long into my relationship with my ex-husband or how long did the yeah how long was your ex-husband when you started seeing someone else about two years roughly but we weren't married second time on the show i know it doesn't make it any better it doesn't make it any better and i get that we weren't married at the time we were engaged i need to stop hitting the table okay like yeah that that too but also that doesn't make it okay sure and does he know the ex-husband yeah yeah it all came to light it all came to light um and somehow he found a way to look past it we took some time um after everything happened like it was a whole thing what what happened so i'll explain he who's he he my ex-husband found out because um when i was unfaithful it everything happened very very very quickly um i was with the other guy just a few times um um by the time that i came around to being like hey you know i need to sit down with my boyfriend fiance at the time yeah and be like look you're not happy i'm not happy we need to go like our separate ways thinking that he was going to be like yeah you're right you know that's how i thought the conversation was going to play out it didn't it played out a whole different way he was like yeah you're right let's fix it i wasn't expecting that i didn't with our relationship being the way it was i didn't think that he felt those feelings for me anymore i thought that we were just gonna break up and he would never know that i was unfaithful and it would just we would go our separate ways and that's clearly loved you so yeah i realized that too little too late too a little too late so what happened then so he said he wanted to fix it i ended things with the other guy we immediately started like looking for a house and doing all these things that we had talked about doing because we were engaged and that all moved very fast we got a realtor we looked at several houses we put an offer in on a place and almost immediately got a house and it was like i mean this happened in a matter of weeks weeks okay it all happened really fast yeah when we closed on the house the week we closed on the house i found out i was pregnant and it with who it wasn't his so oh okay um um oh okay so i'll let you take the rein here and finish your story yeah so i found out i was pregnant right when we closed on the house um i told the father he had his own set of issues multiple kids with other women it was just a mess i knew that it was just it wasn't going to be pretty um no matter what so things you know decisions were made okay i just so decisions were made and the pregnancy wasn't carried to term okay um because I thought that maybe I would be able to just kind of bury the secret and my fiance would never have to know and because I did I loved him I he's a great man I I do appreciate you being open and honest and giving us all context for where things started to go oh right i'm guessing throughout all of this and obviously eventually a separation you know just tying it tying it back to your financial situation so i ended up getting really sick was what brought everything to light um sick how well there's no i can't even figure out how to work around this so it's just got to come out um because i was so early in the pregnancy i want you to be very careful with your words be very careful with words because these are the conversations so i want you to just take your time just out of respect for you i know take your time i know it just it just it is what it is um it's gonna all come out it doesn't matter not necessarily it's this is your this is your this is your conversation yeah but it's my truth and I might as well just say it I guess so I was so early in the pregnancy that when I went through the process of you know I've already said I made decisions when I went through that process because it was so early they decided to do just medicated okay they just give you medicine supposed to just make it all go away i mean that's how they make it sound um but it didn't work it was supposed to work and it didn't work okay and so a week after that i was so sick i couldn't keep anything down i couldn't keep water down i couldn't keep gatorade down i couldn't keep anything down and he took care of me i just kept vomiting and vomiting and vomiting and it was so bad and all the blood vessels were burst in my eyes and he's looking at me going i can't keep watching you go through this i've got to take you to the hospital and i said if you're going to take me to the hospital then i need to explain what's actually going on and that's when i had to tell him okay and he hit the coffee table and walked out of the house and took some time to cool down.

9:43And then because he's such a good man, he turned around and came and got me and he took me to the hospital. And obviously in that moment, he called off the engagement. There was a lot of things said between the two of us. We just bought this house together. i spent pretty much my entire savings on the down payment on this house it was like i put fifteen thousand dollars down on it oh just just a reminder how when did you close versus this event weeks okay this was weeks wow we just moved into the house okay um so i put my fifteen thousand down we closed our house all of that happened within weeks of being there um and then it was basically i was like okay i will the house was in his name he had the better credit house was in his name it was his house it's my money but it was his house your money so um i was like i'll i need time to save up money to find somewhere to go because he didn't want me there i mean understandably um so he allowed me it was a four bedroom three bath house he allowed me to stay in one of the far bedrooms um and in that time where i was trying to save up money and still trying to help with the bills at the house because i was living there and everything else it was over like a nine month span where i was still like looking for somewhere to go um that he we grew back together like okay on my birthday in april he re-proposed that following april so he re-proposed we got married that october so we thought we moved past it you know he felt like he had moved past it enough that we could continue on with our relationship we got married that october after the infidelity after everything had happened um he was still struggling with everything we were working at the same job which happened to be the same place that this person worked no that's okay that's what sorry i know that was just kind of shocked me i'm i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry no this is this is this is your story i know i'm just um i don't mean to smile that just like shocked me i did not know it was just yeah we were we all worked together so he was struggling with that so i told you i told him to quit i told him to quit which one i my fiance okay i told him to quit um and to go to school do something you know go to school for something he wanted to do and so he did he enrolled in an academy um I worked full-time I paid all the bills while he was in school full-time I didn't make enough so I started opening up credit cards um I think there was three or four of them that I ended up opening up I paid the bills with my income and then anything else was on credit cards and I was racking them up and I thought I had it under control i didn't have it under control i didn't have it under control so okay so now we're where we are today yeah divorced because he realized he wasn't over it um how long into it how long did we last uh we got married october of 18 and we were divorced by summer of 21 okay i'm not in a great situation i'm not super happy in my life right now um i know that he is and he has come out better for everything he's with somebody that he loves very much have you found they have a kid no i've had two very unsuccessful six-month relationships since him okay so with where you are today i would love you to just give me an assessment of where you think you are zero to 10 zero being the worst finances 10 being the best where do you think you are uh well i took your test and it was at 0.5 0.5 you want your hammer financial score it's free link in the description below and if you have uh just an interesting life interesting finances uh points of view you want challenge because you know you're just so headstrong on something that you just you need a wake-up call apply come on the show calebhammer.com slash apply we would be happy to have you.

14:35So if all of this is recognizably bad and you know that things are bad, the past is the past and I'm glad you gave us the context. I'm not going to harp on the past. Okay. Let me just be clear. I'm not going to harp on the past. I don't even have close to a perfect past. Whatever. I care about what you're doing right now based on your situation and what you plan to do. Okay. what you're doing right now necessary food is 2.9 percent of your spending but going out to eat is 10 percent of your spending if you know that you're in a bad position because of actions in the past that got you there okay but if you know you're in the bad position now and you don't want to be in the bad position and you see the other person being in a better position you're like wow i deserve as a human being to be in a better position as well why put ourselves into worse positions and make it harder to get forward by spending four times as much on going out to eat than getting groceries what are we doing with our actions there uh feeding the dopamine yeah that little rush and i get it i love the fatty salty sweet is that what we're talking yeah yeah what's really ridiculous to me though is i work in the food industry and i can pretty much eat for free almost every day that i work so the that's why my groceries are so low um but i didn't realize i was doing that with fast food and i talk about pack a sandwich all the time you work at a sandwich i work at the sandwich i have a sandwich i brought a sandwich yeah i brought a sandwich from work okay i did not realize i was doing that what came in for payroll was 2072 does that sound about right for a month yeah now how much went out how much was spent probably 2072 came in how much was spent probably at least 2000 okay i don't ever end up with anything at the end okay but we allow ourselves bull spending a little confused well where do you where where do you want to get to like goal in life yeah where are we trying to get to not where i am okay so you're unsatisfied with where you are but not wanting to be there simply isn't enough having a vision of where we want to go that's what gets a fire under our ass so see like yeah i'll actually sacrifice i'll put in the work to do better and i'll start making my life it seems impossible what it doesn't seem to matter it doesn't seem to matter what i do even if i am saving money um it's at the end of the month i never have money as you know this channel is all about making sure people stop making dumb dumb decisions with their money and start to plan for their financial future well today i want to take a moment to discuss my personal favorite investing app so you guys too can begin to plan for the future and get your money to start working for you i'm talking about today's sponsor moomoo moomoo is the app i personally use to invest in the stock market and make my money grow.

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19:02So what are you waiting for? Don't miss out on these amazing sign-up bonuses because they won't be here forever. Scan the QR code on screen or click the link in the description below to get started with Moo Moo today and start planning for your financial future. You think you're just displacing your addictive behaviors though? Because maybe you're not going out to eat, but where would that money go? Maybe you're putting it in something else that is achieving that dopamine rush. Maybe you're chasing the dopamine rush. That's exactly what I'm doing, but I don't know where it's going. Okay, well, I mean, I can tell you where it's going right now.

19:32uh and to answer the question that i asked you again 2072 came in spending 2430 so it's not that you had nothing left over you overspent so the situation that you're in the situation that you want to get out of being like i don't want to be where i am right now i want to get somewhere better well you're digging a hole worse making you stay where you are even longer so it doesn't do anything for us you have a credit builder chime i would have rather you gotten a charge card a card that you could have put money on and then spent and helped your credit like a like a fizz card or something but okay let's start digging into this again i really do appreciate you appreciate you being as open and honest as you are it's actually kind of impressive 391.41 on there we have people that come on the show and i'm like what do you not want to talk about and they're like don't tell them that i got only once and that's like that's what they care about and then you're just like i'll tell the world everything so i do respect that there's no point in hiding it like there's there's people in my family that are probably gonna watch this and be hearing it for the first time that's scary as hell okay well if you need help navigating that whatever we can do just let us know so on here we have 391 owed and that's what you also have to pay it seems see again we're going to burlington did you have to go to burlington amazon who knows what that is what is the joint corp over land um that's my chiropractor okay that's at least that kind of lot yeah it's that just not it's not a shop tj maxx did we have to did we have to did you have yeah exactly dutch bros certainly didn't need to do that with where you work and then amazon next door okay but like eat the things in the store instead of going next door coffee that's 25 dollars a coffee well so i charge up my account and then i just pay with the app so the big and then price chopper okay so price oh that's gonna hurt my necessary foods price chopper purchases um are mostly going to be paid outs for the store if we need produce for the store so i get i get reimbursed probably isn't even actually necessary food total ending balance 403 but you transferred something okay so transfer okay now this you just brought yeah this we were not aware of this is fresh for us so i haven't taken a look at this this is a letter from an attorney yeah dear clerk in close please find an order for dismissal as to the above caption matter Please file with your office and return filed copies to me in the enclosed self-addressed envelope.

22:39Thank you in advance for your time and consideration of this matter. What am I looking at? I'm honestly not even 100 % sure. I got it in the mail. It's something from my Discover card. I have a Discover card. Well, it says dismissal. Oh. But I don't know, honestly. So this is for a Discover card? Yeah, it's one of the credit cards that I opened when I was married. but most of the cards i've just i've had my head buried in the sand for so long that it's discover bank versus you and it's an order for dismissal yeah but that doesn't mean i don't have to pay it right like um they're not you know it still shows up on my come now plaintiff discover bank by and through its undersigned attorney of record and hereby dismisses the above entitled cause of action against you without precedence against refilling it.

23:35It was probably just too expensive so they probably just they were just like cause like why chase you down for it that's my guess. The thing is I don't even remember and maybe I was just yeah so if it's dismissed it means the case has been closed without discharging. Creditors are still entitled to pursue the collection if they would like to. A discharge would release you from the personal liability but you got dismissed not discharged so okay so they still could again it's probably not worth their money and time the legal fees the filing fees the different things because what it's probably what is it probably like a thousand bucks maybe for the on that card that they would get it's like three thousand do i have the card i don't know because they were all closed they're They're all closed, charged off, so there's no statements.

24:26Okay, this Chase one. This was also something you just sent to me. Unpaid balance of$2 ,693. They're giving you an opportunity. Oh, okay, okay, okay. So they're essentially just trying to get any kind of money from you. And they're allowing you to do monthly payments. So this is actually pretty okay. I mean, it's not okay. You owe$2 ,693. The holidays mean more travel, more shopping, more time online. and more personal info in more places that could expose you more to identity theft. But LifeLock monitors millions of data points per second. If your identity is stolen, our U.S.-based restoration specialists will fix it, guaranteed, or your money back.

25:06Don't face drained accounts, fraudulent loans, or financial losses alone. Get more holiday fun and less holiday worry with LifeLock. Save up to 40 % your first year. Visit lifelock.com slash podcast. Terms apply. It's 193, but they're saying if you pay 942, they'll just let it go. So let's say you owe that number then. Chase. Now, what was this for? A credit card? It was a Chase card, yeah. It was a credit card. Okay. I mean, they're really giving up a lot of money here. $942.78. Now, you can make that payment, or you can make two equal payments, or you can split it into three. I mean, come on.

25:45Three payments? I feel like we might be able to do that. I mean, it almost equals you're going out to eat spending. Yeah. It would be three payments of$314.26. So my question with that, though, was because it's already been on there so long and they've already charged off the account and closed it, I mean, isn't it just going to fall off in a few more years? Isn't it based on recent activity? If I go and make a payment or something, does that restart the seven-year clock? Well, how long has it been? Yes, yes, it would, but how long has it been? Three years. do you really want to do does your credit matter to you i mean i would like to be able to buy a house okay so it sounds like we should just try to get it off then plus it is money that you owed plus they're kind of giving you a deal usually you gotta if it was with like a collections agency like you would have to kind of negotiate with them to get something like this but they're kind of just like jumping to that okay moving along collections yeah yeah

26:56okay this is kia oh wait no no that's your current car no right no or do you owe something yes wait a second it's no that's a hard inquiry you hard inquired to kia okay sorry uh janna pharrell is the collection holder for the kia it was repossessed oh what when so you got a car repossessed so was that after the divorce and after lu and then getting get out of how how'd the leaving the house go how'd you get in finding a place how did that all go it didn't very well um i i the job i was working when he and i were married ended up closing because of covid because we got married in 18 19 hit um both of them i lost i lost my job so i was furloughed for six months and then basically a month after we were allowed to come back the company announced that they were closing that plant so what i did was i took my kia 2015 kia soul that i had it turns out i had six months left on it okay and i traded it in and i got like two thousand dollars for it and they put me in uh 2017 that you picked i got don't say they put me in you picked it i didn't want it i really it was it was the only like so i told him i wanted like an older model soul or something along that lines and they're like well this is what we have that is in your price range what are you talking about well but all i was focused on like the only thing i cared about was getting a lower monthly payment and that's what i told him and i was so stupid but i was like if you can get me a lower monthly payment that's how you get six months left when did you know you had six months left afterwards no i i okay so at the time I just I wasn't paying attention to that kind of stuff I wasn't I was stupid attention to your monthly payment so you well yeah but I mean but yes and no I just made the payments I just made the payments I didn't pay attention to the balance going down or anything like that it just made the payments I didn't pay attention to the time I didn't pay attention to any of that it wasn't until afterwards I realized that I'd only had the six months left I should have just pushed through the six months but they lowered my monthly payments by like$150 and so i thought that was a great deal it was 150 less every month so what was the balance of the car then that new car loan the new car loan i think it was like 18 000 oh my life oh just end everything and it was a i think it was a six year what was the payment it's like 247 and how were you paying for that with my job i mean it was fine in the beginning it was fine in the beginning it wasn't until the divorce was finalized and i moved and then how were you paying for it i wasn't that was how i ended up ended up getting it repossessed so it almost got repossessed once and then i ended up taking out a payday loan to pay it that's paid off though but i to make sure it didn't get repoed i took the payday loans make sure it didn't get repoed and then i got it caught back up and i was doing better about staying on top of it and i just i was in another it was the one of the two bad relationships that i was talking about oh bad you didn't say they're bad yeah i said bad i said unsuccessful oh you said unsuccessful oh they were bad they were bad well unsuccessful means it didn't work okay so the first one was bad okay he he i've known him now for two and a half years and he's never held a job i financially supported us we don't date those people i know we don't date losers so uh i was financially supporting him and then for a portion of the time his daughter and it was hard and i wasn't making very much from when i transferred out here and i mean i was a manager at a feed supply store and it just it was hard it was really hard it was a bad relationship and i wasn't making ends meet i was doing the the pay advance thing where you get daily pay oh yeah yeah yeah and yeah yeah yeah this just shows what a mistake does by the way the i i know you guys try to work on it and again I said I wasn't going to harp on it, but this puts an example.

31:29For those out there that might be considering cheating for whatever reason. Again, I'm not trying to make you feel like. But also, I don't know. For those who are out there considering you had the dream life. Yeah. You had it. And then you went through all of that to sit where we are now with a repoed car. Payday loans to pay it. Oh. it is i'm sorry i don't i'm not i don't want to make you just it's just it is quite the story it is just the whole i'm sorry i'm sorry uh just take take take your time

32:10no i that all the time the fact that i had it all you had it all i had it all and i threw it all away over a stupid decision i was i was not the age makes it okay at all there's no justification for what i did at all but it i was 24 i was stupid i've been stupid up until now i'm still stupid we're all stupid in different ways i threw it all away i threw it all away and i don't think i'm ever gonna have that life that i wanted that i wanted with him that well we're young i'm 32 okay well i'm come on let's not let's don't make me feel old like you're still in your 20s i know barely for a moment you may as well be young and there's time i don't feel that way if you've given up then there's not even giving up it's not even giving up caleb is just like okay everybody has different timelines right everybody has different ideas of how they want their life to be i know how you feel about kids sticky icky stinky kids it's more of a joke i know but like i have and this makes what i did even worse i have never wanted anything in my life more than to be a wife and a mother i've never had a career aspiration i've never wanted to be a doctor a lawyer anything else i wanted to be a wife and i wanted to be a mom and i gave that up i gave both of those things up and now i'm 32 even if i had a kid today that kid would be graduating high school when i'm 50 i don't want to be like i thought i'd be done having kids by this point i was gonna be married at 25 and starting a family and everything and i just okay because even if i start dating someone like i probably wouldn't have a kid until 32 so like come on let's i know but i you might be okay with that i didn't I wasn't okay with that I wanted to be right I wanted to be done having kids by now I want to have kids in elementary school so adoption is something that I am excited about as a possibility um I've been approached by somebody okay asking me if I would like to adopt a child that is due this fall I adopted Noah The worst kid I've ever had in my life No, I know why You say they're sticky and stinky Yes That fiend

34:50But it's a possibility It's a possibility And it's something I'm excited about This is a real good story about Bronx and his dad Ryan Real United Airlines customers We were returning home And one of the flight attendants asked Bronx if he wanted to see the flight deck and meet Captain Andrew. I got to sit in the driver's seat. I grew up in an aviation family, and seeing Bronx kind of reminded me of myself when I was that age. That's Andrew, a real United pilot. These small interactions can shape a kid's future. It felt like I was the captain. Allowing my son to see the flight deck will stick with us forever.

35:23That's how good leads the way. Okay. If this all goes through, I will be doing this on my own. So this is a thing. This is a thing. I was asked to adopt a kid. by like someone just close to you so it's a co-worker's younger sister okay so all right so how do we feel about this over the moon okay terrific yeah well sure i bet so how old's the little creature not not born yet do and uh this fall we get get to do the whole screaming in the middle of the night thing still yes but that's what i look that's what you wanted to yeah and And I don't care about doing it on my own. I just want to do it. But there's always, up until papers are signed, things can change.

36:12So when would that be? When would we know for sure, for sure, for sure? 48 hours after birth is the earliest that a birth mother can sign their birth away. I'm assuming that sometimes after the birth, it's just, well, we don't need to talk about that. Yeah. It's just like, yay. things will be good yeah we hope so okay cool people change their minds and i i'm a realist so i brace myself for those things okay um okay so we have this card that was repo car that was repoed yes you still owe 9888 after they auctioned it after they auctioned it yes okay and it's only been open for eight months so it's not like this is gonna fall off at any time no it was repoed a little over a year ago was last may and we talked about payment plans have we done no anything i have ignored it yeah that is what i'm good at yeah and how does ignoring uh first of all how do you feel getting a kid in this situation when you're not able to pay for your own bills probably not the smartest thing but i'm hoping that i can figure out a way to knock all this out and I like clearly there is mom 18 bucks an hour that's gonna be difficult I know but single moms do it all the time yes but oftentimes a lot of it is put upon them you are taking this opportunity and because I am taking this opportunity I will do whatever the hell I have to do for this kid okay allow me to play devil's advocate yeah you're good is it fair for the kid if they grow up in a financially stressful household no it's not okay because i grew up in a financially stressful household well me too but oh yeah i saw those foreclosure notices i remember hearing my parents talking about bankruptcy over valentine's day when i was like 13 yeah yeah right there with you i no so i don't i don't know i can't tell you what to do with that one that's a heavily emotional choice and there's a lot of things that go into that just you know it's not like the opportunity to adopt will never come again i'm not saying don't do it i'm not saying do it maybe we're considering different income situations i'm always happy to boost your resume with a course career certification and something like accounting or something like that you just let us know we'll set you up with that you know there's a lot of things we can do um like i would want to see you making it like 25 bucks an hour you know i don't know what your living what is your living situation i own a trailer uh i bought it outright i yeah but you probably still pay rent and i do i pay a lot rent but i own the trailer outright i i uh you know love this um i closed a 401k to be able to buy it to buy a depreciating asset i didn't see it as depreciating i saw it as mine well that's not how that works i mean cars are yours they're depreciating how much did you buy it for 12 you so you pulled 12 out of your retirement yeah when when when was that when was that how old were you uh it was after i moved here so 2021 fall of 21 so you were 30 30 29 yeah 29 yeah okay roughly so you have 30 years before you could take money out tax advantage so if i opened up the app where i invest in moomoo i bought some spy it was that in that twelve thousand dollars you know 10 percent is the average return for that just that itself if you just left it in there instead of getting a depreciating asset by the time you're 59 and a half it would have been worth somewhere around 238 000 i said we got something that's going down in value not only that and i'm not saying you know where i'm about to go some stereotypes for a second i'm gonna do some stereotypes can't speak for every community in the world but is that always going to be the best place to raise a child no and it's really not the best trailer park to be completely i was going to talk about the community as well again didn't want to stereotype i'm sure there's pleasant ones out there but historically are they known to be the best no no i want to get i want to get a real house i really do that's but aren't you also i was checking the notes before aren't you still like paying property taxes for someone else though still yeah that was your rent on a thing you own that so so yeah so um the ex that doesn't work that he was living with me he and his daughter were living with me and so he came in some to some money um oh and with that money i was so they were living with me even though we were broken up but how much money context a lot uh do you know ish can you give me a round he won a settlement he got i think after lawyer cuts it was like 60k after cuts okay okay um he got that in december of 22 sure and it was all gone by february of 23 how does this mean you're living with me when all that came through and i told him that he needed to use part of that to get his own place and so he went and got a trailer in a different trailer park but he is this like the thing to do well where i'm at yeah i mean the area um my concern my only concern really is his daughter who i just adore with all my heart i know um sympathy yep and i love the heart so my concern is making sure she has somewhere safe to be um he had the money but he has other kids and like back child support and stuff so he didn't want to have the title of the house in his name because they could if they found out they put a lien against it take it for back child the The trailer itself.

42:41Yeah. So it's in your name? So he used his money, but we titled it in my name so that he, there's no chance of it getting taken with Alina against it. Because I wanted to make sure that she was going to have somewhere safe and not be put in that situation. She's 15 now. She was 12 when he and I got together originally. So a really exciting thing that you guys should be thinking about is we now have all these extra things with our YouTube membership program. You can sign up for our post show. We talk about extra drama for the episode that we didn't have a chance to dive into. Why would I want more than one?

43:20I don't even want one. You don't. You just touch them. Why would I want to do that again? Because it's fun. Is that? And it's awesome. You're good. Me, bro. How is Caleb as a lover? I would give a solid nine. Wow. How do you get to a nine? I just don't know how to answer that because I mean, I just do. I just do. For the upper tier memberships, all the people from the crew from over there, they come together, they make a crew cast and they talk about behind the scenes content and how we do everything here. I don't want to contribute as much because I'm already so much on camera. That is the greatest thing I've ever heard.

43:54Twice a month, Noah and I come here, we have a live stream with you guys and we hang out with you. We answer questions. We chat it up. We talk about the show. We just have a good time. Caleb reads that book every day. I actually wake up and then I gooned that book in the goon stream. And then most exciting right here at this table with even more pie charts. We have an exclusive uncensored ad free financial audit episode for the top tier members that no one else gets to see anywhere else. Consider joining because ad rates are always up and down. We're trying to build something great here. and I wanted to make sure to provide the best content and the most amount of content that's ever been in a YouTube membership link in the description below um but it just how much how much is this uh like uh how often are you paying what well I so they take care of it he takes care of it he has other people living there with him that takes care of like the rent and stuff but as far as the property itself I or the trailer itself because it's titled to me I paid the title titling fees and everything and then i paid the property taxes on it and how much does this cost a year a year annually when there's no late fees late fees oh by you but not paying okay i mean not by me not having the money altogether at any one given time i pushed things off i ended up paying two years of back taxes on mine and a year of back taxes on his just last month and it was about$1 ,700.

45:24This is insane. It's actually not the craziest amount of money, but for three years worth of things. Yeah. So what would it cost you a year? Just says though. $150. $150? Yeah. It's a trailer. It's an old trailer. It's not worth very much. So the property tax isn't terrible. And he keeps telling me he's going to. Yeah. It's literally for the kid, right? It's for the kid. I want to make sure that she's safe. He's a deadbeat. He needs to take care of his shit. But that doesn't mean he is going to. I know. I don't want you to have to pay for this. I don't think you should. But I understand you with her.

46:10That's an absurdly low price. Send me the bill for the next three years until she's 18 and I'll pay for it. Okay? Just do that. Okay? because that's that's it's 150 bucks i can do that okay so do that for the next three years she's 18 then she's out and then we tell him he can go himself okay but i don't want you i don't want you to deal with this but i also don't want to her by him being a piece of okay so the next three years you send me the bill i venmo you the money you pay for it deal deal okay okay cool okay okay let's get let's uh okay car repo we're still on that okay so i know this conversation's been i know all over the place a lot of tea yeah it's tea driven emergency physicians so you owe a thousand in collections it's gone emergency room it's gone it's gone it like literally like two weeks ago i looked at my credit karma and my trans trans unit equifax whatever and it's just disappeared it's not been charged off it's just vanished and i'm guessing it fell off it was a medical they've changed medical rules i don't remember what it is exactly i always forget that's eight years old because that was the emergency room okay well if it's eight years old then that was the emergency room from when i got all right what is this in collections lvnv funding that is a tractor supply credit card are you getting from tractors that was when i was still living in oklahoma that was where i ended up working after my plant closed down and you took out a credit card there at the place you worked yeah because they retail you want to take out a caleb hammer media llc credit card just go into debt from me going to debt from me for 30 okay so retail places they push credit card sales i like if you on the customer well but if we weren't hitting our numbers for the week then our like upper management would be like hey why don't you know if you will apply because it didn't matter if we got approved or not they just wanted people to apply so team members would apply every couple of weeks to make sure our numbers were where they were supposed to be that's insanity approved for it oh hi i'm here to pick up my son milo there's no milo here who picked up my son from school streaming only on pico I'm gonna need the name of everyone that could have a connection You don't understand It was just the five of us So this was all planned What are you gonna do?

48:43I will do whatever it takes to get my son back I honestly didn't see this coming These nice people Killing each other All her fault A new series streaming now Only on Peacock I just That's insanity Dog food, cat food All that kind of stuff That's what I was putting on it but i was doing really good at like paying it off i was doing well at paying it off but i just and then you didn't and then i well and then i got the the separation and everything and i moved all that's the separation that was it how extensive is your resume could we find a better job customer service well my my resume isn't terribly extensive because from 18 to 28 i was in the same field i did industrial printing no no no that shows that you have a commitment though trust me when people hop around once every six months like it shows that they can't stay stable right now once every you know you'd want it to be like two years yeah well i mean after the plant closed down though then i started jumping around i did retail i did tractor supply then i transferred to the tractor supply out where i'm at now that location and then i left tractor supply and did insurance And that was a nightmare.

49:57I will never do insurance sales again. That was awful. And then I realized how much I hated that. And I did the stupid because that's what I do. And I quit without having another job lined up. And I thought that I was going to make it doing DoorDash. And I was not making it doing DoorDash because that was when I was still trying to support multiple people. And that was when the car ended up getting repoed. It actually got, so they repoed it. I went outside to go to my onboarding for the job I have now, and my car was gone. Like, I realized I wasn't keeping my head above water, and I was like, I got a job.

50:36I took a job as a team member at this deli, and it was already too late. How long has this been on your collections, this tractor supply card? 941. Three years, probably. I mean, since leaving. Okay. spot me line of credit what is this it's only 11.99 what is this uh i don't know spot it was nine dollars okay so spot me is through chime it's basically like oh people you know it's like hey spot i don't know you you get like a base credit line and then people can spot you five dollars and if you have a bunch of friends that all spot you five dollars then your credit line tire and so i i turned that off though i did thank you i got it all paid back and i turned it off so i don't have access to it anymore i'm confused honestly on how you couldn't pay like the car loan and all this stuff over the past few years when like i have been told before this that you've spent ten thousand dollars on like quilting so you you chose quilting over a car loan like there is some parts of sympathy in this conversation sure but there's also accountability yeah it's ten thousand dollars on quilting instead of making minimum monthly payments i at a certain point it's not the whole world's against you there no it's not the whole world's against me you're knitting it up quilting it up it's different i well i used to knit and crochet too i i'm a hobby jumper i did that a lot when i was married i was all that was still when i was in oklahoma i but that is where a lot of my spending and bad spending habits came from was i would just spend money on my hobbies and what are we doing to fix that what's different today what is the new hobby because when these other how's your car situation right now um i am very very blessed right now um my grandparents gifted me a 20 year old van okay and so how are paying for the car insurance my grandfather is okay obviously that's not in a position you want to be forever so we need to get control of her spending because in general whether it's behavioral maybe you need to see a therapist or whether it's emotional and we talk about budgeting you obviously just like anyone who goes on here you're going to get access to our budgeting program and our investing program which is by the way bundled now you can check it out for a lower price highly recommend it for anyone but i want you to go through all of those and if you're actually learning how to budget you sit down and budget on a monthly basis you sit down see what you spent last month and how that compares to what you intended to do and how you need to fix your budget for this next month to hold yourself accountable and if you need to give yourself little rewards along the way for hitting certain goals that's good too but if we're spending ten thousand dollars on knitting quilt bullcrap like instead of literally paying our minimum through payments we are never gonna get anywhere in life never gonna get anywhere in life and who knows maybe the next hobby is fish tanks that's expensive as a you know gardening i've found gardening it's not cheap depending i've i've put probably bare minimum 500 into it so far What happens when you have this kid and you're like, I want to do$10 ,000 on gardening instead of putting money aside for their college or something?

54:07Okay, I will say since all of this has come up, since the whole adoption thing has come up, it has put a lot of things into perspective. And it's one of the reasons I started even talking to like co-workers about money and everything because I do, I want to change. I want to change. Did they recommend you to come on the show? Yes. Oh, okay. My boss. He's a fan. Oh. Hello, boss. So, but I want to change. And I'm a collector. Big time collector. I don't even think I mentioned any of this in the application or anything. Starbucks cups were a weakness. Mugs were a weakness. I have tons. I know. It's not even the drinks.

54:54I don't care about the drinks. What are you doing with them? Where are they? they're just pretty yeah where are they on shelves oh so they're actually well well yeah i mean a lot of times they were in boxes like in between moves and stuff but i had these cups i had them on shelves in my house i had pictures of like they were along like the tops of the cabinets and stuff they're pretty but do you have a picture of this oh somewhere i'm sure maybe but my point is they're gone oh when i was gonna say that might scare a man away next time you have one over so i just wanted to you know throw that out the point is they're gone because when i was asked about the adoption and everything it put things in priority like it just it changed things for me i got rid of all my starbucks cups i sent them all over to my grandparents house to sell in garage sales i like purged my entire house i was like get rid of this stuff i don't need this stuff It changed a lot of stuff for me.

55:52Now, I will ask you, and this might come off as mean, but are you sure that this kid in your hobby jumping is not in your brain and how it's working for its dopamine fulfillment and other hobby that you might jump from? Right now, you're putting all of your effort into this by getting rid of things and doing all these things, but just the same way you've put all your effort into these other hobbies in the past. what's gonna say that you don't find interest in something else and put your full focus into that a couple years down the road instead instead of my kid that would never happen okay i would give my life for a child okay i'm just assessing well i've made mistakes and i won't make mistakes like that again so if a child were to come into my life one way another i sacrifice all the time for my ex's daughter i would do anything for her if another child were just somehow coming to my life this adoption goes through well i'll ask candidly you know it's just a person to a person forgetting that this is a show or anything like that but this is being turned into a show is the person who you're considering adopting from going to see the show and what do you think they'll reconsider from seeing this show um she probably will see the show i've actually talked to her about it about going on but i've talked to her about my financial situation before she and i have talked so she knows she's been in my house my trailer she knows like but she also knows like what i have not sacrificed necessarily but what i've done already in place to try and prepare for this kid like i have an entire nursery set up the second bedroom in my house there's a crib there's a changing table there's i mean it's all there's a fully functional i could bring a baby home right now today and i have a nursery and i accidentally create a little whoopsie in my escapades i'll throw it your way oh my god that's a terrible joke yeah that is awful oh my god things fly through my head and i have no filter i apologize i apologize and noah noah just typed that he can live with you if you want another child as well so there's lots of options okay so what is this a bitcoin account well i'm confused oh no no these but you can get crypto in this wallet you got gas i don't know what this is it's some account that holds money it's 19 bucks in there i can't even see what any of the purchases and spending are look they're all blacked out oh but and then you got chipotle and chipotle so we certainly can't do chipotle or something venmo or cash up what are the other hobbies you've pumped money into and have spent um well nail polish was a big one for a long time it's a hobby how much did you spend on that a lot nail polish I don't know thousands I mean so but I mean all these it was I feel like I'm trying to justify it and there's really like looking back hindsight there's no justification but I mean if I stuck with one hobby the whole time I feel like I could justify it but the fact that I hobby jump I don't I know it's like bad like all my nail polish I still have it all it's sitting in a storage unit in oklahoma in drawers and drawers wait can you sell it all i don't know maybe if it's still good even even 25 take that throat out of debt dude yeah i like you're it's just sitting there i don't want to yeah i don't give a shit do you want this want this kid to live a good life or not make sacrifices okay yeah so it's like let's grow up you're 32 like you're in your like you know you turn 18 you're an adult congratulations you've gone through the 18 19 gone through the 20s now you're in your early 30s been through a lot of adulthood i think maybe it's time to act like one okay so i'm okay i can part with nail polish that's i'm over the whole nail polish thing i don't do my nails anymore fine i don't know if it's even in good i mean it's been sitting in storage for years so it may be well you're paying for the storage unit too right yes i'm paying for a storage unit okay but i i'm trying to figure out how to get that emptied out it's a logistics thing call a trash company yeah that's what well my boss's suggestion was to haul it all out into the middle of the thing and set it on fire so well probably that's probably a more illegal suggestion yes but all my quilt that all my quilting stuff is there all of my sewing machines my fabric go get it i've already made multiple trips down there it's there's okay then do one more trip take what you would find that you would take in that trip and then that's obviously the most important stuff and the rest of it can forever okay okay okay it's not unreasonable i i haven't had access to it for three years i am willing to make sacrifices grandpa gave you the truck but i'm seeing on this piece of paper that you owe your grandpa 4 ,500.

1:01:03Yeah, so he gifted me the van itself, but the van is not, it's 20 years old. It's an 04 and it needs a lot of work. It has needed a lot of work. It needed front end. The alignment, I don't do cars, so I'm going to say things wrong, but whatever has the tires on it on the front was off and it was eating through sets of tires like uh we were having to put tires on every like four months um and there's three hundred dollars every set of tires and so he helped me pay to have the front end fixed he's paid for at least two sets of tires three sets of tires and all this is added up to three four thousand five hundred yeah and i still need to put like another three grand into it because it's even worth it i i add his four thousand five hundred hours add your three thousand you could have got a used car that needed less work yeah but this is something i can make i can work on making payments with him where are there minimum monthly payments to him no nothing what are you talking about but what i'm saying is nothing set up yet but we can how long have you owed it to him well it was given to me almost a year ago i know you don't seem responsible to me at all you really do not i'm just calling as i see it not as an insult or take it as an insult i don't really care but like i've made a lot of seem responsible in any way whatsoever you keep saying like i will do this i will like just do it already it's been sitting there for a year and you haven't paid a dollar like i don't there's no effort it's no effort you haven't done anything and you have to put three thousand into it great air conditioner you started your checking account with negative 64 dollars right before the paycheck hit yeah that was it only goes negative because of the spot again we spent three hundred dollars on going out to eat but we allowed our checking account to start negative 64.

1:03:16Marshalls, Starbucks, Amazon. What is this? Southern. $1 ,032. That's a deposit. For what? That was a paycheck. Oh my goodness. Okay. I'm just reading everything negatively from this conversation. Venmoing out$40. Venmoing out$25. Panera Bread, Amazon, Starbucks. something Amazon but via Google. Whataburger. Ikea. Amazon. Every dose? Everyday dose? 60 bucks? It's a mushroom coffee subscription. Stop. Just get cheap coffee from the store. I thought it was supposed to be cheaper, right? Cheaper per serving? I don't know how much you get for that. You can get a... 30-day supply? No, buddy. You get a big tub of that.

1:04:07blue that tastes like and it's it's coffee it'll do the coffee things and you'll get used to it after a couple weeks i get the matcha i get the green tea matcha yeah i really okay it's not coffee it's but i i get what i can't speak as well about tea but you still should be able to find a cheaper version if it was coffee i know for a fact going inside getting some bs chipotle amazon what are your amazon purchases retail rebel i'll look at that in a second amazon water burger then went out 15 dollars amazon amazon amazon potentially going inside games you pull up your amazon yeah you start a screen recording as well what does that mean i don't know oh is that oh what is that thing oh you have one of those flippy things yeah whoa i just don't have ever seen one in person okay can i see yeah it's okay we might not be able to have screen recording that's fine i'll still go through okay you got a we're pregnant shirt it was for a photo shoot it says like for who we're pregnant but mostly her so it's gonna be like me and the birth mom okay i don't think you need to do that because you don't have money let's put money towards the kid instead of that yeah microfiber mop pads it's a lot of pads okay plus more mop pads those are those were i gotta pay it out for those those were heart things oh little heart things lithium battery guy thank you cards baby formula thing when does this kid do this fall okay you got you already got the little sippies bottles or okay i don't i don't even know i've spent very very minimal on that okay well how are you going to be able to spend anything you started your account negative how are you going to be able to get a crib I have all that.

1:05:55I'm very thrifty sometimes. You also started an account with negative. I don't know if it worked. As a full-time creator, I can tell you creating engaging videos takes a lot of time and effort. From scripting to editing, the whole process can be a headache. But that's where InVideo AI comes in. With InVideo AI, you're in the director's seat while the AI acts as your co-pilot, taking care of all the heavy lifting. InVideo AI is the world's most used AI video creator with over 10 million users in more than 150 countries. It's the only tool I found that lets you control every aspect of your video using simple text prompts.

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1:07:43So if you're serious about upping your video game, try InVideo AI. Plans start at just$20 a month and you'll get access to millions of royalty free stock footage clips, voice cloning, and more. Scan the QR code on screen or check out the link in the description below and use my code CalebeHammer50 to get two times the number of video generation credits in your first month. I don't know if it shows on here. My spending is a lot of like marketplace, cheap items on marketplace and like thrift stores and stuff like that. But again, you started negative so we can't even say it worked. you had negative money in your checking account at the end of last month so we can't say it worked 78 bucks in this in cash app and I don't know what a lot of it is but Viva La Vibe was one of the purchases bullshit zero dollars in savings so a kid with zero dollars in savings is also just I just don't know if we do that but it's so hard for me to tell someone do not have a 26 dollars in robin hood so alright no there should be like a hundred dollars in robin hood not at the time of the statement oh and that's it okay hoping to see any kind of retirement besides that i know you said you drained it but i was hoping yeah something left no it's what are we gonna do well i don't what are we gonna do i can help you budget we might be able to stick to a budget oh let's see how your budget works out then we can talk about career stuff because you know that depends so we need to get your budget.

1:09:13So, minimancy payments is the time and the chase.

1:09:42DJs.com slash Thanksgiving and get the same great savings online as in club. We're obviously going to do that chase. They're giving you a deal. Okay.

1:09:56705.67. So your minimum fee payments. What's your rent? Or what's your, because you own the thing. Yeah. What's your lot rent? My lot rent. It's all bundled. Lot rent and utilities is usually between 650 and 800. Oh, okay. but that includes utilities sure internet it's included okay car insurance grandpa takes care of it um but i'm taking over when um like this week how much um i've got a quote for it's gonna be 72 like 72 or 75 a month but i'm bundling um like a the auto and uh like property and how much like 72 a month really are you sure yeah i can pull up the quote okay uh how much do you spend on gas obviously probably not the best mileage 120 a month maybe uh what's your service on there um how much does it cost 90 do you still owe on that yes and no i traded in i traded in my phone i got an 800 credit and i paid off the balance okay so you do not owe on that i don't owe but if i left i would owe because it's a trade-in credit i get 22 a month on it well it's like 36 months left yeah 90 for the service