From Financial Shame to Freedom: How Eliana Paid Off $100K and Took Back Control of Her Money | 435

0:00So it's interesting because since my husband isn't part of the actual coaching session, how I position different conversations with him, I need to be sure, and Vanessa, we were talking about this not too long ago, like, instead of telling him here, here's what I'm going to go and do, which many times he doesn't care. But if I want to be inclusive, like, hey, here's something we discussed in coaching. I want you to check out this, some of the different savings accounts that are out there and banks versus saying, hey, I'm going to move our money over here. Or, you know, I'm letting you know, I'm informing you versus having involved in the conversation.

0:34So some of it, you know, there's an art there. And he has been just amazing through this process and excited. it. So he'll ask me, he's like, oh, so would, so any, any updates out of the coaching session that I need to know about, or, or how can I help support? So he's been phenomenal, but there has been some times where I got to be sure I'm not telling him what we're doing or what, you know, what we talked about in coaching. Now I'm going to go and execute on just ensuring I'm including him. And then with the kids, so I have two children, with the kids, it's sharing with them, like they're still young, but they're getting to the point where they understand money.

1:11They understand things cost money and that us telling them no is okay, that you don't need to get something every time we go to the store, right? And so there's an appreciation there. And even with my daughter going out and I'm like, look, this is special. If this is something you want to continue to do, then you're going to have to figure out how to start earning money to be able to do it. And we can talk about that, but just understand this was a special occasion, mommy. This isn't part of the budget every month for you to get to do. And so planted the seed. So the little wheels are absolutely turning.

1:44And she hasn't come back yet with how or what she wants to do to earn money. But I know here and soon she will have a plan. She will have a lemonade stand.

1:54Eliana:She'll have something. She will have something. Well, do a lemonade stand for the summer. It'll be perfect. Do you make good money but have nothing to show for it? Are you tired of living paycheck to paycheck? Do you have big dreams for your financial future? Do you want to get debt free, but you don't want to live on beans and rice? Or you don't want to give up those pumpkin spice lattes? Hey, it's okay if you don't already know how to budget, or if you're using credit cards to get through the month. Hey, it's okay if you want to seem like you have your finances all together, or you're not on the same page with your spouse when it comes to finances.

2:25We know what you're doing probably isn't working, but guess what?

2:28Eliana:You're in the right place. We're Shana and Vanessa. We're best friends, business partners, and master financial coaches trained by Dave Ramsey. We've been in business since 2019, helping hundreds of amazing people like you create budgets, get out of debt, stop living paycheck to paycheck, and know exactly what to do with their money. In this podcast, we'll share with you everything we know, plus everything we're working on with our clients so that you have the best chance at reaching your financial goals. We want to help you take the guesswork out of your budget, improve your marriages, and even bring your kids in on the conversation.

3:00We can help you no matter where you're at, whether you're the single mom who's never had$500 in her savings account or the millionaire who's paid off four real estate mortgages.

3:08Eliana:And we're not going to shy away from the tough love. We'll tell you what you need to hear and encourage you at the same time. This is the Financial Coaching for Women podcast. All right, Eliana, we're so excited to welcome you to the Financial Coaching for Women podcast. Welcome. Thank you. I'm so excited to be here with you all this morning. Well, you have been such a blessing to coach these last nine months. And so this is a testimonial podcast. Eliana came on for coaching back in the fall and she's made amazing, amazing progress. And we're so excited for her to share her story with you guys.

3:44Well, and it's also super fun because before we started recording, you said, well, I feel like I know you, Shana, because I listen to the podcast because obviously you're Vanessa's client. And I was like, yeah, and now you're going to be on the podcast. So it's like super meta, like full circle moment here going on. I love it. I love it. I love it. Yeah. I, I, I feel blessed to have found you all probably about 10 months ago. I just was searching for some guidance on how I can better manage our finances for our family because my husband and I, we have some big goals that we wanted to achieve and I knew how we were doing it.

4:21We were in a rut. We were like in this cycle that wasn't helping us get ahead. And I found you all. And I had listened to a couple others and I just kind of was like, okay, that's nice, moved on. But there was something about the chemistry between the two of you. I felt like I was talking to friends and listening to friends and you two just have a fun way of approaching it. And then when Bougie on a Budget came up, I'm like, there we go, that's it. You're like, correct. Yep, yep, yep, absolutely. You know, love that because we've, we have grown into bougie on a budget for sure. And it's definitely, it resonates with us.

4:59We are, we are just spoiler alert. We are so much more bougie than when we met. We met obviously, gosh, 12 years ago or whatever. No, we were like sharing a string cheese or something. And now we're like, Hey, which hotel are we booking for that volleyball tournament together? Like it's just out of control, but we're all out of control. We're all bougie. It's fine. And so, and we, like I was mentioning, we, other podcasts and other things are a little bit more scarcity, a little bit more whatever. And we're like, we don't want anything to do with that. Thank you anyway.

5:30Eliana:Now I love when we get to make your budget every month, Eliana, because it is so much fun and it's, you know, you're taking care of the things like you're being an adult, the responsible things that you have to take care of. But also you get to have a lot of fun with your family and your trips and, you know, gifts and father's day, mother's day, all that. Like, it's just, it's so fun because you are living. You are being abused in a budget in your own way because that means something different to everyone. And that's what we're all about. Yeah. And I was just talking to my husband. You know, I think we've talked a couple times about some of the stuff that you were working on through coaching on the podcast.

6:03But, you know, not everybody's goal is to pay off debt. Or at least that's certainly not their top priority all the time. And that is okay. Like, you make good money. Let's go ahead and make it align and match up to the things that are important to you. So with that being said before, so you were listening, you're like, these girls are okay. Was there any, did you have any concerns or thoughts before you started financial coaching or did you just dive all in? Yeah. Great question. I, I am a huge advocate for coaching, whether it's fitness, you know, fitness trainers in the past to help me achieve fitness goals.

6:38Also like executive coaching to help and career. So I'm a huge, huge advocate for coaching, but I will admit I was a little nervous because I had, I guess, some shame around like, you know, I'm a mature adult. You know, I have children, a family, a career, and I should have this all figured out. But I was in this rut, in this cycle. And so that was my own internal, you know, clock and messaging to myself. and when Vanessa and I connected like right out of the gate she's like look there's no judgment here and there was a lot of debts like there was a lot of just silly credit cards and I was like and the balance of this is bad and the payment is this and oh the interest rate oh I didn't even know what the interest rates were on some of these credit cards like that Vanessa you were just so gracious and just like okay well here's what it is I mean just these are the facts so let's figure out how to, to figure this out.

7:41And, and that was such a relief. And so, you know, Vanessa, I love what you said. And, you know, you, you look forward to doing my budget each month. Like I never was excited about even thinking about a budget because I was like nails on a tough board, right? It's like going on a diet and, Oh, I can only have 1200 calories and you got to actually like who that's not fun.

8:01Eliana:No, I remember multiple times when we were making your budget, I would make it and you're like, okay, but like what's left. And I'm like, you know, we have money left. And you're like, but how? It's like for you, the math wasn't mathing because you couldn't see it because in your mind, it was never going to work out. It was never going to add up to what we wanted it to add up or what you wanted it to add up. And so I'm just so glad that in the process, you have seen your budget grow. You have been able to trust that everything is going to work out. And I think that it's happened. And I'm so excited to kind of share some of your success here.

8:35Eliana:So talk, ask. yeah well i wanted to ask you so i love that analogy about like the calorie restriction did you did that change like once you guys started doing your budgets you showed up how what did it feel like instead of that yeah it it's been a mind shift right a mindset shift which has been amazing it's like oh because there's a system now i know what i can go and spend right and i don't need to feel guilty i don't need to ask for permission and i know you know the bills account that's taken care of. Oh, and as a family, we want to do this. So, you know, going out to dinner, having fun outings with the kids, it's fine.

9:14So just, just that peace of mind now, when we go to spend money and swipe the debit card for whatever appropriate account it's coming out of is, is really freeing. And that mental stress each month of thinking of, Hey, how are we going to cover everything. Things are coming in, things are going out. And seeing it was like, and I think I've shared this too. It's like a wrecking ball in my head and I couldn't figure it out. And yeah, put things on a spreadsheet, but that wasn't helping me. It just was like a list. It really wasn't just like what your system, what you all have designed has been so helpful and has really helped reduce the stress and helped quite frankly, the conversation that my husband and I have around money because he he's been fully trusting of me he knows what I'm doing he's not part of the sessions and so I go back and I share and when I share like oh this is we're paying this off now he's like oh we are I said yeah it's it's done he's like oh or you know there's this expense coming up I'm like yeah I got the money it's setting aside so we can go do x oh okay and so it's just been such a a freeing and and helping like reduce that stress even in conversations where he would say, okay, I think we need to go spend money.

10:28I'd be like, oh gosh, really? Do we have to? Jagging might be. And so it's been just really liberating.

10:37Eliana:Well, I remember when you came in, you had quite a few line items on your debt tracker, but most of it wasn't because you had to be in debt or because you couldn't pay it off. I think, and I remember I was having this conversation, you were literally using credit cards because you just didn't know. Right. Like You just weren't confident that the money was there because you were half using debit cards, half using credit cards for the security aspect of it. And then when we actually looked at the numbers and were like, hey, we can clean this up, it took you a couple sessions before you were like, oh, okay, really?

11:11Eliana:Are you sure? And then once we did it, you were able to see the fruit of all that. That's right. That's right. Yeah, because it was, I, there were so many things moving in and out of the account that I, we also didn't have the accountability to, I think, around how we were spending money. So part of our issue was we did have a spending problem. I didn't like to tell myself, no, my husband. And I mean, we just, we just both were really good at spending money and getting whatever we thought we needed. And so that's been the other piece of having this process and this system in place is now we have boundaries, but these are healthy boundaries, right?

11:53And so I love the accountability. You know, like the other day, I took my daughter. We went out and did some girly things. And I'm like, all right, honey, the spending money is out. So I'll help you not escape me for anything. But it was fun, right? And I know. And next time when it's replenished in another week, it'll be good. And there's, you know, still money to do what we need to do. But whereas before it'd be like, oh, okay, we did this and let's go and do that. Right. It just, there wasn't that accountability and boundary. And, you know, we, a lot of times we do compare it to food and stuff.

12:28So it's, it's like this binge and like when we, a lot of times we binge and then we regret. So what I heard you say earlier is, you know, you guys would be like, well, we need to spend more money.

12:38Eliana:And you'd be like, well, you know, we don't want to feel that way. We want to know that, yes, we can spend money very clearly. And like you said, there's some boundaries. And I wanted to talk about the accountability a little bit because, yes, coaching is very much holding your account. It's very transparent. Like the numbers don't lie. It is what it is, right? But even like what you said, just the system itself helps you stay accountable because you have a spending account with a certain amount. And you have to be accountable to yourself to hold that or to steal it. Literally, you have to go steal from yourself for some other amazing thing that you want to do for yourself in order to do it.

13:15And it does sort of help you also stay accountable. And so I think that you get it either way.

13:19Eliana:Well, that's what I was thinking. You were talking about the accountability of coaching. And my brain immediately went to the accountability of the separate accounts because I believe that. And you were really good. You know, as a coach, we kind of help you guys set everything up when we tell you what to do. But we can't make progress unless the thing is done. And we've had some clients where there's a little bit of resistance and sometimes it takes them three, four months to get to that point. You were really quick on getting all of your accounts set up, which allowed you to be successful very quickly, you know, soon in your, in your coaching.

13:49Eliana:And I think you saw the fruit of that. And then I think it was funny, which I don't, you just said this the other day on your session. And I thought that you were already had everything automatic, but I didn't realize you literally nine months later, Eliana, it's fine. And we're not going to talk about that. You just set everything up to be transferred automatically into those spending accounts. Right. I was listening to one of the other podcasts about like, you know, have the bank work for you. And I, and I was like, why am I, what? So even in the code, I was like, wait, did I fail? No, no, no, you did not at all.

14:24I'm sure we talked about it, but, and I'm sure, you know, I always have my action items and move the money over. But I was like, oh, because like the other piece, too, when I came and we started working together, Vanessa, right? I had money in so many different places.

14:42Eliana:And that was fun game. Hide the money. Right. Like, and that was part of how I guess we were budgeting. Like, OK, this bank has the mortgage. This one has the car payments. Right. And then everything else. And you're like, why? Why are you doing it this way? And I'm like, I don't know. I don't know a better way. So yeah. Yeah. But that's why even in the coaching, I love still listening to the podcast because there's always things. This is a learning journey, right? I don't remember or like at the pinnacle and have it all figured out. All right, Budget Besties, it's time for some Real Talk. You don't need another budget.

15:21Eliana:You need a budget system. Our simplified budget system is what you've been looking for. It's going to allow you to be bougie on a budget. You'll be able to easily set up a system that runs automatically and shows you exactly where your money is going. And it's going to give you permission to spend. Everybody loves that. Yeah. It's straightforward, pretty, and packed with walkthrough videos that break down the exact methods we use with our clients to get out of debt, set up a bills account, separate spending, build savings buckets, and end the paycheck to paycheck feel. If you're new to budgeting, this is the perfect way to jump in.

15:55And if you're already a budget nerd like us, you're about to meet your new obsession. This is the upgrade to your finances that you need right now.

16:03Eliana:Yeah. So head on over to budgetbesties.com forward slash budget and grab yours. Now back to today's show. We're actually working on because there's so, like you said, there's so many things to touch on. It's like we need to send some emails just in case we like didn't, especially if we're like trying to find all these different accounts and there's so much going on with your money. So like, there's a lot to be able to be done, but you know, it's all like 1 % better. Every, every little bit just makes, it makes it run smoother and better. So what would you say, you know, specifically were the things that helped you or maybe some breakthroughs that you had during your time coaching with Vanessa?

16:38Oh my goodness. So I think first and foremost was just the change in mindset, took the shame out of the process and let's figure out how, how to get there. And I know that there was a couple of ahas, which I love when we update the debt tracker and you would say, you've paid off so much money, right? And the first time, I don't even remember what the number was. I'm like, how is that even possible that it was? Are you sure? Are you sure? And so to have gone from, I think we just did the tally, like I had 14 different debts, many of which were silly credit cards, now down to just five, which is kind of, you know, your basic five around.

17:17Eliana:No, no, no, you paid off 14. I paid off 14. so you had a total of 19 okay so i had a total of 19 thank you um and and i'm still in awe because i i still sit here and say this would never have been possible but i paid off nearly a hundred thousand dollars which is i have to pinch myself um because literally yeah i that would never have been possible to do that on my own i would have who knows what i would have done it it would have been a 10th of that. You paid off all, literally we met Vanessa's math. We're like a thousand, you're like a thousand short of that a hundred thousand and you'll hit it this month.

17:58But the other thing important here is you pay that all off and you've been, you know, whatever girl things that you just did with your daughter, you're talking about, you know, getting ready for this dream home. Like there's been, it's been a little bit of everything and you're, and you're making progress on every front.

18:13Eliana:Well, and I also want to add to that because some people will hear that number and they're like, oh, well, she probably sold a house and, or she probably got rid of a car. Like, no, that actually is not what happened. You paid off that in whether it was bank loans or credit cards or things like that. So like, that's, it's huge. You did a lot of work through the process, but you also, like Shana said, you lived and had a lot of fun. And yes, you may have put boundaries or guardrails up on your spending, but everybody needs to do that at some point in their life and you like were adulting a little better, but you still were able to, to spend.

18:49Yeah. And we were talking about, obviously, you know, bougie on a budget. That's where, that's where we're, we're all living, but the, and that's where you were, what we find is, you know, you, yes, you make good money, but you're using credit cards for reasons that none of us really know just other than somebody gave me one or some, some clerk at the checkout was like, Hey, you can save 10 % today. And all of a sudden you have another credit card. Okay. And then I think you mentioned like, you probably had money in savings, which is a great idea. Somebody told you along the way, save money. You're like, done.

19:18I will do that. And then, but then you're like, but why you mentioned that I'm not making any interest on this. Like, so all of these little things that we can, like, we don't need the credit cards. I can actually pay for all this in cash. I'm going to move my savings either to pay off debt, or I'm going to put it somewhere where it's making me money. Like all of these little things, again, 1 % better. And, And the other thing I think about, Eliana, is like how much less cluttered your budget, your bank account is that you have 14 debts that you don't have to pay on every month anymore. You know, like that's 14 line items that are just gone from your budget, which is amazing.

19:50It is amazing. And it feels so good to have this gone. Yeah.