Should We Sell Our House to Get Out of Debt? What We’re Wrestling With as a One-Income Family | 489

0:00Yes, you have sacrificed and it breaks our heart. We know exactly what you mean when you felt like, okay, this is, I thought I had this career. I really enjoyed it. Now I have this baby. I want to stay home with it. Totally get it. Feel it. There's a lot going on right now that could be changing your young family's future. Like your entire future, having a husband we know that has, that's doing a job that he actually enjoys. That is quite, that is worth the sacrifice right now. If that's going to happen, having him not hate his life, he would be. magically a better husband, better father, all that.

0:32And so it's tight right now, but maybe that is what it's supposed to be. Maybe this is how your family is supposed to be growing. Do you make good money but have nothing to show for it? Are you tired of living paycheck to paycheck? Do you have big dreams for your financial future? Do you want to get debt-free, but you don't want to live on beans and rice? Or you don't want to give up those pumpkin spice lattes? Hey, it's okay if you don't already know how to budget or if you're using credit cards to get through the month. Hey, it's okay if you want to seem like you have your finances all together or you're not on the same page with your spouse when it comes to finances.

1:05We know what you're doing probably isn't working, but guess what? You're in the right place. We're Shana and Vanessa. We're best friends, business partners, and master financial coaches trained by Dave Ramsey. We've been in business since 2019, helping hundreds of amazing people like you create budgets, get out of debt, stop living paycheck to paycheck, and know exactly what to do with their money. In this podcast, we'll share with you everything we know, plus everything we're working on with our clients so that you have the best chance at reaching your financial goals. We want to help you take the guesswork out of your budget, improve your marriages, and even bring your kids in on the conversation.

1:41We can help you no matter where you're at, whether you're the single mom who's never had$500 in her savings account or the millionaire who's paid off four real estate mortgages. And we're not gonna shy away from the tough love. We'll tell you what you need to hear and encourage you at the same time. This is the Financial Coaching for Women podcast.

2:01Hi, Mackenzie. Thank you for coming on Financial Coaching for Women. Welcome to the show. Tell us a little bit about you, who you are, and how we can help you. And we're excited. We read a little bit about what you sent over, so we're excited. Let's go, girl.

2:13Mackenzie:Yes. Pardon me. I might cry. It's been stressful. Yeah. A month ago, my husband got let go from his job. I recently just went back to work full-time after we had our second yeah and after my first I actually had the privilege of we were in a financial position that I was able to stay home basically for six months with her so to go back eight weeks after having him jumping back into full-time was just totally that wrenching yeah yes yeah I will say it's worked out he's done really well and I'm really proud of myself and how far this has come. And at that point in time, he was working as well and really hated his job.

2:58Mackenzie:And so we have been anticipating this to come. But I was like, if we can just hold out to the end of the year, we just make it to the end of the year, because we had started to really make some good progress on paying off debt. My husband has he's got a he's tracked up the student debt bill, we have together 80 grand, which is our payment ends up equaling out to about without mine because mine are in deferment right now. His alone are 420. So by the time mine kicks back in March, it'll be close to$600 in debt. We're fortunate enough that there have been times where I have relied on a credit card in the last few years that I was off or working part-time.

3:43Mackenzie:And so we have about, I want to say we have$3 ,000 in credit card debt, which isn't terrible. It's been manageable. But our mortgage payment is$2 ,600 a month. And we just lost two thirds of it. And so I feel a little lost. I'm a big, I've started listening to your podcast actually in the last few months, because I feel like in the past, we've tried the Dave Ramsey thing. And he doesn't really give you a good, everybody's budget is so different, which I get why he doesn't give, this is how much you should allocate to this. And he gives general percentages, but everybody has different priorities.

4:24Mackenzie:And with the amount of debt that we have, I, after finding you guys, I was like, there's definitely ways that we obviously have to make sacrifices here and there, but we can also work. It gave me hope to be totally truthful. It wasn't so black and white and bleak and, oh my God, it didn't feel like this heavy burden that it really feels like right now that we only have one income. So I wanted to seek out your counsel because over the last couple of months, we've dabbled with the idea of, okay, maybe we need to move. Maybe that's the best solution for us considering all things considering the mortgage tends to be the biggest expense as well as a little backstory.

5:12Mackenzie:When we purchased our home, we had moved from Florida. My husband is not a handyman and I love him dearly. I live in work and interior design world. So I have a standard that I like, of course, that I'm used to seeing. And when we lived in Florida, he was a student and I made most of our money. I bought a house on my own income. We sold that house for us to move back to Kentucky to be with our family, which by far has been the best move that we could make for our kids and for support reasons. But I feel like we definitely have struggled since then because I think we just stepped When we purchased our home, I was working full-time or I had a full-time job when we bought it, not realizing that I was going to miss being home with our daughter.

6:04Mackenzie:I just felt like my heart changed and my priorities changed. And so now we're in this place where we're stuck with a house that is well above our means, one less income. And he's trying, he's dabbling with running his own business. He is very interested in AI and we were fortunate enough right before he lost this job that he did end up signing a contract with a company as a part-time job. So it was really exciting and I'm trying to be very supportive of him in that sense because the last couple of years have been hard and he has made a lot of sacrifice being in a job that he doesn't like. We do have a little bit of savings, not a lot, not where we probably should have.

6:47Mackenzie:I would imagine if we can ride it out until the end of the year, him not having to pick something else up, that would be ideal. But I'm really confused on the house situation. How do we go about if we wanted to downsize? There's really not a lot of options in our area that we would be sacrificing a lot. We'd be getting either a really old home and a really small home for a$600 difference. Yeah. And then you have, you have to fix it and maintain a really old home too. And not to mention the market right now, would you even sell your house? Would you come out on top or not? Yeah, no, we should. My neighborhood itself is still good.

7:33But unless you go rent, then you're the, you're probably going to have a worse rate. So anyway, the point is moving. There's a lot, there's a lot here, but I, we probably wouldn't say moving is the first step. What you do need to get clear on is we shouldn't be like savings maybe can take us to the end of the year. We need to know for sure how long savings exactly. So savings is his new paycheck. You have your budget, you know exactly what you guys cost every month. You look in between your income and his side business or growing business, whatever you want to call it. How much does savings need to supplement us like a paycheck to get through each month?

8:11How many months is that? That's the first thing that both of you need to be extremely clear on. And then we totally know about husbands doing jobs, sacrificing for the family that they don't want to do. But the challenge is that you have this job, hopefully he likes it more than the one that he was let go from. You have to find a way to make that make enough money. That's the challenge. You can do it. It's totally probably possible, but that is the standard. Otherwise, you're going to have to go back into the workplace with whatever skill set that you had to make us money. Cause that's, that's the way it is.

8:44Like it takes you to live. So does he like this new side hustle? Okay. Then let's hone into that and make that the new full-time thing. Like Shana was talking about, how can we make that the new standard, the amount of money that he needs to make the fund, the family budget. So whatever, have you guys made a budget yet? Do you have I can't remember. Yeah.

9:07Mackenzie:Yeah. We sit down and we actually talked on Sunday about where we're at financially. We did look at our savings and where we're at. We have a number that we have a number in our savings that we didn't want to hit below. But you have to understand right now you're in storm mode. Like this is emergency. Yeah. You're in a major emergency mode. So if you have to deplete it at this short time, instead of going into debt, that's the answer. That's what you want to do. But you also have to know when you go to make your budget on paper, it isn't just monthly bills, monthly gas and groceries. You have some Christmas coming up if that's what you're choosing to fund.

9:44You have to also see what you have to pay for upcoming in our next coming month. And you need to put that in a budget so you have a full picture of what you're going to cost. And then you go back to the drawing board and say, okay, this is how much it is. This is how much And instead of going into debt, you're going to need to use that money because that would be, you want to be your own bank. That's what you've been saving for. It's there. The money is there. You don't want to put that on credit.

10:10Mackenzie:Yeah. And I would, and that is what I'm planning on. There will be no credit expenses at this point in time. We have, yes. So I just want to point something out here, which you may have already thought of. Vanessa and I have had the privilege of God teaching us the lessons a really hard way, not the easy way, not the like little gentle nudge and whisper, like the door is slammed in your face. This is the only way forward way for the stubborn individuals that we are. Yeah. So what I want to suggest is whatever happened that the full, the real full-time job, whatever you want to call it, he got let go of, while he already had the side hustle, while you have savings in the bank, you know, that line, such a time as this, I feel like maybe there's a little bit of that going on right here.

10:56And yes, you have sacrificed and it breaks our heart. We know exactly what you mean when you felt like, okay, this is, I thought I had this career. I really enjoyed it. Now I have this baby. I want to stay home with it. Totally get it. Feel it. There's a lot going on right now that could be changing your young family's future. Like your entire future, having a husband we know that has, that's doing a job that he actually enjoys. That is quite, that is worth the sacrifice right now. If that's going to happen, having him not hate his life, He would be magically a better husband, better father, all that.

11:29And so it's tight right now, but maybe that is what it's supposed to be. Maybe this is how your family is supposed to be growing. All right, budget besties, it's time for some real talk. You don't need another budget. You need a budget system. Our simplified budget system is what you've been looking for. It's going to allow you to be bougie on a budget. You'll be able to easily set up a system that runs automatically and shows you exactly where your money is going. and it's going to give you permission to spend. Everybody loves that. Yeah. It's straightforward, pretty, and packed with walkthrough videos that break down the exact methods we use with our clients to get out of debt, set up a bills account, separate spending, build savings buckets, and end the paycheck-to-paycheck feel.

12:12If you're new to budgeting, this is the perfect way to jump in. And if you're already a budget nerd like us, you're about to meet your new obsession. This is the upgrade to your finances that you need right now. Yeah. So head on over to budgetbesties.com forward slash budget and grab yours. Now back to today's show. When my son was six weeks old, I'm an only child. I have no idea. The first diaper I changed was my son's. I, my husband and I moved to Alaska. So zero help, zero. We, I lost my income just like you. I, God told me to stay home. We had no money. I had no friends. It was in the middle of winter.

12:47I literally didn't even get to see humans. Okay. And it was so hard, but looking back, I can see there was obviously there was a reason God had us. He, we grew as a family. We grew as a couple, our marriage grew stronger, all of that, but it was so hard in the moment, but it set us up for the next stage in life. And so I'm hearing all of this thinking, this is the time hubby needs to go all in and make this thing happen for himself, for his future, for you guys. And then, and let this savings, what a blessing, be really proud of your guys. As you're young and you have this nest egg saved up for such a time as this, apparently, like Vanessa said, it's not that you're not going to make money ever again.

13:25Okay. So don't think if the savings goes away, it's never going to get built back up. That's not true. This moment is why you have a savings account. Yeah. So I will tell you, there was a time where my husband and I had extra money and we were able to invest it. And we were so excited that we had this money in an investment account. And it was amazing. And we had to use it to pay mortgage. Oh, no, that's not what I thought. Like this was when my kids were babies and we were so mad at ourselves that we didn't have that money. And I said, you know what? I truly believe that God had us put that money there for that specific time because he knew that we were going to need it and we did.

14:04And that was okay. It was okay for us because let me tell you where we are now is so vastly different and so much better than I thought we were going to be because we were disciplined in the moment and we did not go back into debt. Yeah. Okay. But there are times where things are difficult and they're hard, but they're supposed to be that because what you're going to pull out of your amazing brain and of all these ideas and thoughts that you would have never had, had it been easy and comfortable this year right for this moment. Okay. To be outside of your comfort zone, to find a solution that is going to set your family up for the future.

14:38Like this is the why right here.

14:41Mackenzie:And that's what I needed to hear. Like I keep, my husband and I have really been trying, I feel like fighting the will and being like, okay, we need to set ourselves up for if we need to move and we need to do all of these things. And we really have been blessed and smart enough to over the last even couple of months have been able to start allocating to savings again. So I know that it can happen. I just get so much anxiety after being in a place where I made six figures. I I'm used to having money and not having to worry about and then now have two kids in diapers and you know hey we've been we've all been there like this is you're rich and baby googles yes you know what I mean and that you can't like use that at the store but it obviously fills your heart so much and but you'll get there again yes like you you're young you guys and this is the part of life Like it's a lot, it's a lot right now, but you will get back to that position and it's, you made a sacrifice and understand.

15:46And so did he, you guys made a sacrifice to go live with family to your, you're living under, under, under your previous means for a reason. And it's totally worth it. We often used to say, I think it would be easier for women to not start an amazing career and then have babies because it's like you are not that either one of those are bad. It's just, you have this vision of I was making this money and now that I'm not. So it's like this expectation that you were quote unquote trying to live up to, but that is totally okay. Her and I were in that spot and we went, we had the babies and then we were staying home with them, but you're never going to get that time back and you will get that money will come again.

16:26It's going to happen, but you're in a position right now. You're in a different season of life and that is okay. Yeah. When we're talking about selling a home, like. That sounds like a good, easy fix, but it's way more complicated. Yes. It's way more complicated. When people come to us and they're first saying, they're like, I think I need to sell my house or a car. We're like, okay, hold on. Pause. We need to lay all of the numbers out. And that's what you guys do. Put it all on paper. I guarantee that it's not going to be worth it. Okay. There's very seldom situations, thank you, where it has been worth it to sell a house.

16:59Okay. But usually it's not. And in your case, what you've told us, it doesn't sound like it is. Especially in this time. long-term solution to a short-term problem. Yeah. And you probably don't need to do that. So we just, that just take that off of your thought process and okay. Put all of that energy into making that money, that paycheck come higher instead of all of our energy. And that's what I was going to say. Faith is faith for a reason. Like stepping out in faith, it's not supposed to be easy. And if you knew how it all was going to work out, it wouldn't even be, it wouldn't even be a risk and put all of your eggs and all of your energy into the making the more income bracket bracket instead of the other.

17:37What if I do this? What if I do that? And the wrecking balls in your brain safety lane right there, because, and then the other thing that you might be thinking, it might've been thinking, which we've all done is let me get my husband back into this nine to five 401k job that maybe he doesn't love. And that's going to solve the problem. But again, that's not taking, that's not taking that leap. That's not going in the direction that God is probably trying to push you guys. and it's not safe anyway. This is my new revelation and it's not me. I don't, we see people lose their jobs all the time for nothing that they did wrong.

18:06That's just, now it's going to a different country or it's going to AI or whatever. And so that's having this steady nine to five is not necessarily a safe fit, a safe fit either. So maybe building your own thing and leaning into this thing that lights you up,

18:22Mackenzie:that might be the more safe thing. No, I'm really proud of him. And I, I think that it's just hard because we've really had each other. My parents have been super helpful and his parents have too. But I feel like I look at, you know, I compare myself to my friends and where they're at and the positions that they're in and the decisions that they've made, obviously put them in the place that they're in. But okay, but hold on. You can't, you have got, you can't compare. Okay. You honestly really don't know where they are mentally or financially, physically, like you don't know where their head's at.

19:01They can show you the outward facing Facebook or when you have conversations, but sometimes you truly do not know what's going on behind closed doors or how they're feeling behind closed doors. So it's really easy to compare ourselves to other people. I get it. In a time, in a day and age where we're on social media and that's all we see is everyone's good moments. Don't worry about anybody else. I will tell you, there was a time in my life where my husband and I were super stressed for three years. It was awful and we couldn't see it. And God kept telling us to keep going and keep going. And I was so frustrated.

19:34I didn't understand why I didn't see the end of it until he showed it to us that it was better than I could ever imagine. So just keep going and don't worry about what everybody else is doing.

19:45Mackenzie:tunnel vision yeah yeah thank you guys I really appreciate the feedback I I really just I needed that reassurance sometimes I know what the right thing is and like I've had that instinct in my head of just stick with it I don't think that we're going to have to move because I do love my house and discussion on that yeah yeah and so the other thing that was something else that that I say in my mind is make it the right decision. I was literally just telling my daughter that about her gymnastics drama, make it the right decision. We can go back and forth in our brains. We can do all of this overthinking overanalyzing, but you're deciding to stay here now work and make it.

20:27So it was the right decision. Do get to work, do your thing. And I just know, I just, we just want to tell you, cause apparently you're our little sister. Okay. There's no, there's just no end to what your husband can do with you standing behind him and supporting him. And I know it's hard for you. It's also hard for him. Like he not being able to provide as much as he wants to be able to provide or whatever. We know that's hard for him, but nothing is like going to be better to him than you. Like I'm proud of you. And I know you can do this and I'm behind you and we're going to, we're going this direction as a family, like just nothing better.

20:58That's so powerful.

21:00Mackenzie:Yes. No, I'm, that is very exciting to me. Okay. Okay. Okay. Now that we've all had all the feels. Yes. All right, Mackenzie, Thank you so much. Please feel free to come back on. Email us or anything. We're really rooting for you guys. We'd love to continue this journey with you, okay? Yeah. Thank you. I'm super, super excited. If you're tired of feeling like your finances are all over the place and you're ready for a simple set it and forget it way to budget, we have something special for you. Watch our Automate Your Budget Masterclass at budgetbesties.com forward slash automate. We'll show you step-by-step how to finally organize your money, how to set up your accounts and put your budget on autopilot.

21:39So your bills, saving, and spending run like clockwork. Imagine less stress, more savings, and the freedom to spend money without having to track every dollar or babysit your bank account. Go to budgetbesties.com forward slash automate to start today.