The Mom-Friendly Budget That Makes Room for Debt Payoff, Date Nights, and Travel Sports | Reair: Amy Dave, This Incredible Mom Life | 550

0:00Our goal for you is to want you to have all this stuff in your budget. Like we want you to plan for all this. We want you to be able to do the deer lease and the travel sports and all that. However, if you can't do it in the moment, then you have to make some decisions. And we're not saying no. We're saying maybe no right now in this season because we want you to like, what is your version of bougie for them? For them, it was volleyball season for their daughter right now. But then after that, then they're going back to doing the deer lease. But if you can plan ahead for all of this stuff, then you know you're always going to have the cash to pay for it.

0:29You're always going to be able to have cash to pay for all these events, and you won't have to go into debt because we don't want you to have to rely on debt. Do you make good money but have nothing to show for it? Are you tired of living paycheck to paycheck? Do you have big dreams for your financial future? Do you want to get debt-free but you don't want to live on beans and rice? When you don't want to give up those pumpkin spice lattes? Hey, it's okay if you don't already know how to budget or if you're using credit cards to get through the month. Hey, it's okay if you want to seem like you have your finances all together.

0:58or you're not on the same page with your spouse when it comes to finances. We know what you're doing probably isn't working, but guess what? You're in the right place. We're Shana and Vanessa. We're best friends, business partners, and master financial coaches trained by Dave Ramsey. We've been in business since 2019, helping hundreds of amazing people like you create budgets, get out of debt, stop living paycheck to paycheck, and know exactly what to do with their money. In this podcast, we'll share with you everything we know plus everything we're working on with our clients so that you have the best chance at reaching your financial goals.

1:30We want to help you take the guesswork out of your budget, improve your marriages, and even bring your kids in on a conversation. We can help you no matter where you're at, whether you're the single mom who's never had$500 in her savings account or the millionaire who's paid off four real estate workers. And we're not going to shy away from the tough love. We'll tell you what you need to hear and encourage you at the same time. This is the Financial Coaching for Women podcast. Hey, besties. We're replaying one of our favorite chats from another podcast with our friend Amy from This Incredible Mom Life.

2:02When we were starting our business and deciding exactly what we were going to do, we were teaching Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University, which a lot of people have heard of. And what we realized in that class is that no one really teaches you how to budget. There's an expectation that you know, and it's part of the whole process. But no one, but our clients would or our students would be would come in confused as to actually how to budget yeah so we actually extended the class by a whole extra week so that way they could come in bring their budgets and we can talk with them explain it and then once we went through their budgets we realized oh nobody wants to live on beans and rice and try to scrape by and live on bare minimum to be able to get things done and so we decided to come up with this concept much later on but we still implemented but we didn't know what it was but it's just being bougie on a budget meaning you can pay off debt and go on vacation.

2:51You can pay off debt and still go on date night, right? So there's so many different things that you can do when we want you to make a budget that you're excited about, that you love, that brings you joy. It doesn't feel like scarcity. And we say the B word because budgets, it's a very taboo word. The minute you hear it, people like the skin on their or the hair on their skin stands up and they're like, nope, I'm out. No, thank you. But we don't want that. We want to change the vocabulary around that.

3:15Amy Dave:Nice. Yeah. I think budgeting is not easy. Even if you're like, if it sounds easy, right? List your income, list your expenses, and then subtract and see what you have left over. But I know there's other things that play into that. And finances and budgeting is a big cause of stress, which is what I help moms with is reducing stress. So talk about any tips you might have for moms who may have never done a budget and like, where would they start? How would they get going? Yeah, where we want to start is just letting you know, it's okay that you don't know how to budget. We think that there, again, there's this expectation that you should know.

3:57And all we know maybe is a little bit about what you said, Amy, I think I'm supposed to put my income and my expenses. But we know that's just words and number on paper, and it doesn't actually help you. Eventually, we'll get to it. We've created a budget system because that's what you need. You need something that you can actually do with your hands, not words and number on paper. That doesn't really help. But the first part of it to us, like we said, we were teaching people how to budget. We realized nobody had ever taught them. That's where the real struggle was, is to simplify it. We wanted it to be as simple as possible.

4:24Mom words, right? We went out and looked at budgets, and it would say variable, fixed, like gross words that we didn't understand. We call them boy words. Maybe they're fine. But we didn't like that. So we made it very simple. You started it off right. Income, minus your debt, minus your bills, not expenses, bills, because we all know we have to pay bills, minus your spending, and then your savings. Those are the five simple columns in our budget, the very simple budget. Yeah, we really wanted it to be as easy to follow and understand as possible, and not in a mindset of, oh, you can't understand this because you're not smart.

4:59That's not what it is. It's just your budget should be pretty. It should be eerie. It should follow what you do each like during the month and what you do with your hands. And you have income coming in, you have debt payments, you have bill payments, you spend money and you save money. Like those are the five things that happen with your money throughout the month. That's how we laid out our budget. It's very easy to understand. And again, one page, one piece of paper, and we figured out if we put it on one piece of paper, it can't be scary. It's not hard. It's not long. Like we've seen people send in their budgets.

5:25We have a bad budget podcast one time. And it was just words and numbers on paper. And it's okay, now you did this, but what do you do? What do you do after that? And so we really wanted to make a full system that shows people how you can be successful with your money throughout the month. Yeah. And the other thing is what people typically do is they're doing this like tracking stuff and that's not budgeting. And then they're trying to, when you say needs versus wants or expenses and that's, but okay, but actually what you do is you spend money. Like the bills cut, those are a whole different thing, but then you go out and spend money on gas and groceries.

5:56You spend money at the restaurant You spend money at Target or wherever you like to shop. That is what we really need to solve for because these are different things that are getting you confused. So then the next thing that we really started honing in on is to separate, right? Because a lot of times you'll all have one account and all of these things that we're talking about, your rent, your tuition payment, your utilities, the dog food, the going out to eat after the game, all of that is in one account and you never really know what's happening with your money. You don't know where it's going.

6:25and so that we find that our people, they say, why do I make such good money but I still, I don't have nothing to show for. I feel broke still. It's just because it's very disorganized. And it's, they think they have an overspending problem but the reality is that they have a disorganization problem and there's the lack of clarity of what's happening with their money because everything is all cluttered in one account so we really wanna separate it out so you can see your money. This is for gas and groceries. This is for bills. This is for me, like to take a girlfriend out for lunch. This is money for my kids.

6:55If you can imagine seeing your money like that separate and organized, you will naturally spend less. There's one. And then you won't have to track because I want to go back to that really quick because everyone loves, they think that tracking is budgeting. That is not. Like all of these budgeting apps that you have that's telling you what you did after the fact, that's not a budget. Okay. And so we want you to release yourself from that. I think that's one of the biggest aha moments we have when people do our budget and they think, I don't have to track anything. And we're like, no. each of those individual categories become their own mini budget and you no longer have to track any of your expenses throughout the month, which allows them a lot of relief and allows them the freedom to spend.

7:35Yeah, that's great.

7:37Amy Dave:I like that you simplified it to one page. Easy. And I like that you allow families to still participate in activities that they would like to do that may not that may have fees and you're buying sports equipment, you're traveling with a team, you're doing dance recitals, you're doing all these things. So how do you talk to those moms who have kids in all the activities and they still want to be financially savvy? Oh, yeah. That's part of this idea of savings buckets. So let's back up. First of all, when we say bougie on a budget, that's what you're talking about, Amy. And we do agree. This has evolved as we've evolved.

8:16When we first started our business, we were like, okay, how are we going to afford these kids going to school? And then now we are as bougie as it comes. We've got all the travel sports. We've got their big birthday party. We're just, we're not going to hide. We're not hiding from it. We definitely stepped up our bougie-ness, but it wasn't just us. Our clients are like, I don't want to give up everything. I would like to get out of debt. I'd like to do that. That's a good goal, but I'm not going to give up traveling with my kids while they're home with me, while I have the opportunity to go on and make these memories and do spring break.

8:44So we get it. Everybody's bougie on a budget is a little different, but specifically for the sports moms, we love, when we're talking about separate, we not only want you to separate and have separate spending account, we want separate savings buckets, separate savings accounts as well. And so for something like that, your first season might be a little rough. Hold on, let's just back up. Tell about your first meeting, your first aha moment with how much volleyball was going to cost. Yeah, so my daughter is a little older than her daughter, so we stepped into it first. And I remember thinking, oh my gosh, I'm not really sure how we're going to do this.

9:18Cause it's not just the fees that you're paying for it. You're also having to pay for the food and the travel and entrance fees and all of that. So they're all separate. But I think I tracked it all. So that very first year I tracked exactly how much we spent everywhere we, where we went because I wanted to be better prepared for next year. No, but tell them you were at the meeting and they were like, it'll be 4 ,000 or whatever it was. And that mom, remember the mom told you, oh no, go ahead and plan for it. Oh yeah. Yeah, she said it's going to be like$10 ,000 after you get done with hotel fees and food and everything.

9:46And I thought, I'm selling kidneys and we're donating plasma. That's what's happening. So I think that's a really good context for your moms because I know that happens to a lot of us. You get into it thinking, okay, they've given me this fee sheet. This is what I need to plan for. It's going to be a lot, but I'm going to make it happen. And then it just keeps adding on and it's so much. And then that's when you start to get overwhelmed and maybe you just throw it on deck. So the first year might be tough, but after that's where we want you to put that all, list it all out. Again, like Vanessa said, it's not just the fees.

10:17It's the uniform. It's the gear. It's the coach gifts. It's the entrance fees. It's the parking fee. It's the hotel fee. It's the food. All of that. Just get it all out there. And that gives you your actual cost, which is very eye-opening for folks when they figure that out. Okay. So now that we know it's actually$10 ,000 a year, not$4 ,000, the sweet little price that we try to convince or sell ourselves on this process, then I need to go ahead and divide that theoretically by 12 and start setting aside monthly for it. That way, I will always have some money to pull for all of these different things.

10:49Yes. All right, Budget Besties, it's time for some Real Talk. You don't need another budget. You need a budget system. Our simplified budget system is what you've been looking for. It's going to allow you to be bougie on a budget. You'll be able to easily set up a system that runs automatically and shows you exactly where your money is going. And it's going to give you permission to spend. Everybody loves that. Yeah. It's straightforward, pretty, and packed with walkthrough videos that break down the exact methods we use with our clients to get out of debt, set up a bills account, separate spending, build savings buckets, and end the paycheck-to-paycheck feel.

11:26If you're new to budgeting, this is the perfect way to jump in. And if you're already a budget nerd like us, you're about to meet your new obsession. This is the upgrade to your finances that you need right now. Yeah. So head on over to budgetbesties.com forward slash budget and grab yours. Now back to today's show. So if you can think about, like I told you, I went ahead and looked at exactly how much we spent that year in it because I wanted to be better prepared for next year. So when Shana said it's going to be rough the first year, that just means that in the moment you're going to need to be budgeting for this stuff.

11:57You need to know every month how many times you're going out to going out of town to do all these events. Once you can budget for it in the moment, after that, we want you to, like Shana said, add it all up, figure out how much you need. And then the next year, you're going to be saving monthly for this$10 ,000 travel sport. Yeah. Yeah. And it might be$800 a month just so that you can afford to do everything in the moment the way that you want to do it. But what I would say for moms is, and we've done this with our clients, like I said, they don't usually know how much it is. And you really need to know that and see if you can afford it.

12:32Because I think that is where people get lost. So I had a client, they gave up, they had a deer lease. Once we looked at everything, which for people listening, that means they're going to go hunting. Like they're leasing. Maybe you all know. Leasing properties. I didn't know. I was like, what? Whatever did? Anyway, but that was expensive. That was, I think, five or$10 ,000 a year that they did as a family. I think more of the boys did it than the girls. Anyway, they decided while their daughter was in the volleyball season, they were going to give that up because they had to look at the reality of whether they can afford it.

12:59And I think that's the most important part. Instead of racking up debt and not knowing if we can afford it, let's see what the actual numbers are and let's plan to afford it or have them kids do some fundraisers and let them help as well. Yeah. Our goal for you is to want you to have all this stuff in your budget. Like we want you to plan for all this. We want you to be able to do the dear lease and the travel sports and all that. However, if you can't do it in the moment, then you have to make some decisions. And we're not saying no. We're saying maybe no right now in this season because we want you to like, what is your version of bougie for them?

13:28For them, it was volleyball season for their daughter right now. But then after that, then they're going back to doing the duallys. But if you can plan ahead for all of this stuff, then you know you're always going to have the cash to pay for it. You're always going to be able to have cash to pay for all these events and you won't have to go into debt because we don't want you to have to rely on debt. We know people are using it for credit card points, that's different when you can have the cash to immediately go pay for it. We don't want you to have to rely on a credit card because you don't have the cash to pay for the thing that you want to do.

13:58Amy Dave:And that makes sense. You can do one thing in one season and the next thing in the next season. And yeah, that's very practical. And it seems easy to manage once you get the hang of it, I think. So is this part of your budgeting system? Yeah. So like we said, we want you to to simplify, right? So it's five columns on the budget. And if you take your income minus your debt, minus your bills, minus your spending, minus your savings, you're going to get to zero on purpose, but your savings are not some generic thing. They are on purpose, right? And then we want you to separate it. That's the next step is to have separate accounts so that it's kind of like cash envelopes.

14:36A lot of your listeners might remember like hearing about that, or maybe they use cash envelopes. It's like that because you're allowed to have more than one checking account. It's actually, you're not 18 anymore. You can have a new system. So then, but after you separate it, then we want you to automate it. And for these moms, this is like where I know every paycheck, certain amount of money is going into my gas and groceries account. So I know I can feed these fools, love them, but they're always hungry. Like every single day they want so much food. I know money's going into my volleyball account every paycheck.

15:04So I don't have to think about it. You can set all of it up on automatic recurring transfers that way. Look, she, I was at a gymnastics meet this weekend. She was at a volleyball tournament. We get it. You don't have time to do all of this stuff. It can be done automatically. And our goal for you is for your budget to not be a roller coaster. We don't want it to feel like you're on a roller coaster. We want your budget to be as consistent and as automatic as possible, right? And so when you look at your budget and you go, okay, 90 % of this stuff is pretty much the same. Your bills usually don't change a little bit, right?

15:36Your debt payments don't change. Your gas, groceries, your regular spending throughout the month don't change. And if you can add up your savings buckets, like we talked about planning ahead for all the things that you want to do, you know exactly how much you need to put in monthly to be able to make all of that happen throughout the year. 90 % of your budget is pretty much done. So then you're really just maybe managing the small 10 % of in the month things that happen. So maybe you have a holiday festival or there's like tickets for the Sanger Theater down the street that you want to go to for this year or something small.

16:04But other than that, our goal is to have everything separate, to have it automatic, and you can use your bank account to do this, right? So like your bank app that you're using, they already have the tools in there to be able to make it automatic for you. This was so fun. Thank you for having us.

16:22Amy Dave:Of course. I definitely know I need help with my budgeting. So maybe I'll go check out some of your resources there. Here's the deal. Just to close it out, Amy, just like your life is more complicated as your boys get older, as our kids got older, your money is more complicated too. And so we really just try to help you use the tools that we have this modern era to make it easier. Like I said, we're in it. We get it. Like we have basketball games tonight. Like we've got volleyball practice, like all of it's happening. We don't have time to be sitting in there tracking, wondering, hoping, wishing, guessing, all of these different things.

16:59You can set your budget up on automatic. You can feel really good about it. You can feel like I know where my money's going. It's going there on purpose. And by the way, my bank is acting as my personal assistant doing it all for me. That's the whole thing. And so, yes, we want that for all of the moms because we, like you said in the beginning, you don't need money to be a source of stress. There's enough other things in your life coming at you daily, trying to stress you out. Let's not have money be part of it. Yeah. Can you imagine just being fully present on what's happening in the day-to-day life where money is not one of those stressors, right?

17:27It's not weighing you down. It's not a monkey on your back. Like it's just something that's happening in the background. It's as a resource and it's helping you be successful versus you feeling like you have to go manage it.

17:39Amy Dave:Yeah, that's amazing because you're using the tools that we have, right? There's so much technology out there to automate everything and you're not stressing about it, which makes you healthier overall. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. This was so fun. Thank you again, ladies, for joining me. Thank you for having us. If you're tired of feeling like your finances are all over the place and you're ready for a simple set it and forget it way to budget, we have something special for you. Watch our Automate Your Budget Masterclass at budgetbesties.com forward slash automate. We'll show you step-by-step how to finally organize your money, how to set up your accounts, and put your budget on autopilot so your bills, savings, and spending run like clockwork.

18:19Imagine less stress, more savings, and the freedom to spend money without having to track every dollar or babysit your bank account. Go to budgetbesties.com forward slash automate to start today. As always ,piece use system in the Sauce is not very important and usage is available by me along the