In short
The episode mixes comedy and travel/health talk, with a recurring theme of “real-world” strategy: sleep quality, appetite control, and practical logistics. It opens by arguing that exhaustion despite healthy habits is usually caused by poor sleep quality, especially if there’s heavy snoring or gasping; it promotes home sleep studies (Sleep Doctor) as a clinical-grade alternative to labs. It then pivots to weight-loss struggle as appetite management, promoting Bioma’s GLP-1 booster to increase natural GLP-1 production (prebiotics/probiotics/postbiotics) to feel fuller and curb cravings. A major discussion is NFL international games: the Rams vs 49ers opener in Australia, criticizing the 49ers’ acclimation advantage (49ers arrived 8 days early; Rams arrived the night before) and debating jet lag strategies.
Guests
the transcript features David Spade, Dana Carvey, and mentions Chris Rock and Adam Sandler (as birthday/set stories), plus recurring comedy guests (e.g., Kyle Dunnigan, Nikki Glaser, Mark). Notable examples include the “duct tape” unruly passenger story, a plane window-opening anecdote, and a viral “fight a chimpanzee for $500k” segment.
Written by AI. May contain mistakes. Listen to the episode to check what was said.
Chapters
Tap a time to open that second in VONFL Strategies and International Expansion
0:00 to 0:55
Dana and David discuss NFL strategies for international growth and team management.
“Have you ever noticed, despite eating well, staying active, and getting a full night's sleep, you still drag yourself out of bed exhausted?”
NFL Strategies and International Expansion
2:10 to 5:28
Dana and David discuss NFL strategies for international growth and team management.
“Even the sports ESPN, you're like, please say it sucks to go over there.”
Travel, Time Zones, and Team Performance
5:28 to 7:45
They explore the effects of travel and acclimatization on team performance in international games.
“Well, my 49ers have Devo Samuels back, so probably no one's going to beat them.”
Adam Sandler's 60th Birthday Celebration
7:45 to 10:12
The hosts share humorous anecdotes from Adam Sandler's 60th birthday on set.
“I can't wait to play the Zanzibar Zebras.”
Memories and Reflections on Friendship
10:12 to 14:03
Dana and David reflect on friendships and shared experiences with Adam Sandler.
“I'm telling you, I think Adam's done very well with his career and finances and everything.”
Celebrating Adam Sandler's 60th Birthday
14:03 to 15:44
The hosts discuss Adam Sandler's approach to celebrating his 60th birthday and reminisce about past birthday experiences.
“Is his character Adam Sandler in the movie or no?”
Discussion on Chris Rock's New Movie
16:00 to 16:42
The hosts share their thoughts on Chris Rock's new movie, its premise, and its importance.
“Upfront payment of$45 for three months,$90 for six months,$180 for 12 months.”
The Intrigue of 'Misty Green'
16:42 to 20:23
The hosts delve into the details of Chris Rock's movie project and the dynamics of Hollywood storytelling.
“That cast, Allison and Kobe and Neil and Jason and you, you were so upbeat and gung-ho.”
The Notion of Comebacks in Showbiz
20:23 to 21:48
Discussion about the nature of comebacks in the entertainment industry, using Chris Rock as an example.
“It's about like the movie coming out and he hasn't done press.”
Filming Challenges and Stunt Doubles
21:48 to 22:44
The hosts talk about the challenges of filming stunts and the use of stunt doubles on set.
Show all 25 chapters
An Incident on Set
22:44 to 25:02
A humorous encounter on set where a crew member mistakes David Spade for a stuntman.
“Are you a guy in the movie or are you the stuntman?”
Reflections on Fame and Identity
25:02 to 28:04
The hosts reflect on their experiences with fame, identity, and public perception in Hollywood.
“And then, but the funniest terminology is Farley's dad.”
Travel Plans and Movie Sets
28:04 to 30:02
Learn about the excitement of filming in Italy and the casual banter about food preferences.
“In Italy, things don't work quite as well as they do in America.”
Parallel Movie Ideas
30:02 to 31:16
Hear about the development of a new film concept involving familiar comedic actors.
“but I've actually been developing a parallel movie.”
Crime and Law in LA
31:16 to 34:22
Discuss the current crime situation in Los Angeles and societal responses to it.
“I mean, that's a pretty, he's not an opening act.”
Squatting and Trespassing Issues
34:22 to 36:54
Explore the challenges posed by squatting laws and personal stories regarding trespassers.
Buzzing Around Introduction
36:54 to 37:38
Prepare for a comedic segment featuring impressions and humorous dialogues.
“they're starving starving for starving okay okay i'm going to this part i have to read it to you We do this every time and I'm not ready every single time.”
Buzzing Around Introduction
38:04 to 38:24
Prepare for a comedic segment featuring impressions and humorous dialogues.
“I say caramel, but it's caramel apple flavor.”
Impressions on AI
38:24 to 41:39
Enjoy a humorous take on AI and its implications through character impressions.
“So I don't, with buzzing around, I don't want to show the pictures, but for people at home that are watching this, this is John Wayne.”
Impressions on AI
41:48 to 43:25
Enjoy a humorous take on AI and its implications through character impressions.
“caramel apple five hour energy shots deliver sweet and tart apple hits with a smooth buttery caramel coated finish.”
Impressions on AI
43:30 to 44:49
Enjoy a humorous take on AI and its implications through character impressions.
“We all have those hero little items in our closet we reach for every morning.”
Impressions on AI
44:56 to 45:07
Enjoy a humorous take on AI and its implications through character impressions.
“Get free shipping on your order and 365-day returns now available in Canada and the UK, too.”
Unruly Passengers and Flight Stories
46:12 to 56:00
A humorous discussion about unruly passengers and flight experiences.
“This has been a little played out, but you know what this is.”
Anticipating Upcoming Content
56:28 to 56:56
Discussion about looking forward to watching upcoming shows and events.
“I'm going to get some popcorn, and I'm going to the first matinee.”
Closing Remarks and Audience Interaction
56:56 to 57:20
Hosts encourage listeners to interact with the show and provide feedback.
“Maybe we should stay in the more temperate climates when we're talking about 300 pound linemen gear.”
Transcript
Automatic transcript. May contain errors.0:00Have you ever noticed, despite eating well, staying active, and getting a full night's sleep, you still drag yourself out of bed exhausted? We spend so much time fine-tuning our diets, workouts, and daily schedules, yet we completely ignore the single biggest factor behind our focus, patience, and productivity. Genuine sleep quality. Poor sleep quality undermines all the hard work you put in your health during the day. Especially if you or your partner have noticed heavy snoring or sudden gasps for air.
0:25Dana Carvey:Instead of struggling through brain fog and endless fatigue, Sleep Doctor provides a seamless path to real answers. The home sleep study is a simple alternative to a sleep lab and can be completed in your own bed over one night. You get clinical-grade diagnostic insights into what is actually happening while you sleep, completely avoiding cold, sterile clinics and inconvenient hospital stays while giving you clear, practical next steps toward deep, restorative rest. Visit sleepdoctor.com to take the first step toward waking up rested and ready. Now accepting most insurance, check and see if your insurance is eligible.
1:04Have you ever noticed that losing weight isn't always the hardest part? It's fighting your appetite every single day. You start with the best intentions and the cravings hit. Before you know it, you're reaching for snacks, even when you're not really hungry. That's why I wanted to tell you about Bioma's GLP-1 booster. It's a daily supplement designed to increase your body's natural GLP-1 production. Since GLP-1 is a hormone that helps you feel satisfied after eating, increasing your body's natural production may help you feel fuller longer, better manage cravings, and make healthier choices.
1:35Dana Carvey:What makes Bioma different is its science-backed formula, combining prebiotics, probiotics, and postbiotics in one daily supplement designed to naturally support your body's GLP-1 production. it's a simple natural approach that works with your body if you're looking for a natural way to help manage your appetite and support healthier eating habits visit bioma.health slash g l p one and use the code fly for an extra 15 off your order that's bioma.health slash g l p one and code fly for an extra 15 off no one's allowed to say anything bad against the NFL if you're in it. Even the sports ESPN, you're like, please say it sucks to go over there.
2:20And like, I think it's a really good idea to go to Bulgaria.
2:23Dana Carvey:You're not going to send football teams to Zant. I'm not here. I'm not here. It wasn't my stuff. I just dropped something. Now hiring. I have probably three different stuntmen. Why? We don't know. Well, because you don't move the way you used to. I have one for eating. I'm so creaky. You should do the movie. You should do it. You should do it. hit bombs. Mark, you told me to do it. Hey, at the end of the day, nobody put a gun to your head.
2:52Dana. Who is it? We're hot off the presses. D spit. I'm square here with my hair freshly scraped out of the shower.
2:59Dana Carvey:Wow. Your hair has got better since you headed. Do you like it today? Cause I just washed it. Um, I don't know. I have very, it depends on the day. Like if you talk to me in two hours, I might love it. Yeah. By lunchtime, I might go, huh? I'm in my dingy room with my Aspen shirt on. Don't be jealous. It's fine. Don't be jealous of my. No, it's fine. Oh, final. You got a lot of shit. Quickly in sports. Yes. I have the Rams defense in one of my fantasy leagues. Don't ever. My 49ers are a force to be reckoned with. I'll just say it. Oh, that's right. Your 49ers. How gross. Oh, my God. but they did good and did you know the strategy of playing first of all the overall thing of the nfl everybody wants to be worldwide you know what i mean like because the world cup so they want to make football and the commissioner i think said that american nfl teams will live overseas like there'll be the barcelona yeah that's great i'm out busters yeah the i could do some rude jokes I'm skipping them.
4:11Dana Carvey:Save them for Vegas.
4:16We'll get to Nikki in Vegas, Caesars Palace gig that we, I just got back from. Okay. So the Rams play the 49ers season opener. I think it was on Netflix.
4:27Dana Carvey:They did in Australia, in Melbourne, in a, in a hundred thousand seats, sellout stadium. I know you act like you didn't know anything about this. Okay. So they did that. You're talking about travel airplanes. Well, okay. The big, the big, thing they're coming under fire for, which they wouldn't if they won, was the 49ers went eight days ahead to get acclimated, and the Rams went the night before. Okay. And so they just said, let's just, we're tough. We're football players. Just land, go, fight it out, sleep on the way home. Well, what were they doing? What were they doing the previous seven days?
5:03Dana Carvey:Just training in LA? They're playing grab ass and gold brick. Did they understand jet lag? Do they understand time zones? And I'm doing this because I don't think they do understand. I don't think they get it. I don't think you get it. Do you have lay flat seats?
5:28Dana Carvey:Well, my 49ers have Devo Samuels back, so probably no one's going to beat them. But yeah, that's really, really dumb. The team was exhausted. That's ridiculous. Yeah. I mean, I think it hits you. I've been to Australia and it's like you go on and then you try to sleep. Then you wake up and you watch a movie. Then you go back to sleep. Then you watch two more movies. Then you watch a series, 18 episodes. Right. Then you sleep. Then you do your calisthenics. And then I get out and do toe touches in the aisle. Yeah. I'm always stretching on a plane too And everyone thinks I'm fucking bananas No you gotta get up because if you just sit that long Then you get blood clots I get in the aisles and I go get up get up get busy Yeah you get up Hey I'm David Spade I just played Vegas You know who I saw on my first Australia flight When I went there for the Joe I think I told you didn't I I think so The Croc Hunter The Crocodile Hunter Yeah, before he died.
6:34Dana Carvey:Yes, there's other people following in the footsteps. The lizard grabber is a guy that grabs lizards. Not as dangerous, but lizard grabber is huge in Australia. Now you have to do one now. Snake grappler, that's the guy that whacks off. I said the lizard grabber. I know, I couldn't beat it. The ant stomper is a guy, some people think it's cruel. The ant whisperer. he goes break away from the pack you look stupid doing what they do the mosquito lover he tries to save mosquitoes i think my mom got west nile by the way didn't that's a mosquito it's so west nile and phoenix come on oh come on they go in the nice area scott who scottsdale was a nice area so anyway the my niners won that's crazy they probably won't do it again fuck the rams got beat like a narc at a biker rally.
7:32Dana Carvey:Okay. That's a title in town, you know. All these rugby fans out there waiting for them to take their helmets off and play like real men. Let's get in a big pile with our short shorts on and see what sexual orientation we're finding. Hey, the NFL is going international. I can't wait to play the Zanzibar Zebras. It is true, though. They play these teams and even NFL players you know no one's allowed to say anything bad against the NFL if you're in it even the sports cat ESPN you're like please say it sucks to go over there and like I think it's a really good idea to go to Bulgaria I just feel like an 18-hour flight see the sights it's really like a bonding event yeah I think the main I really think the main thing to remember is that everything you're watching basically everything you're seeing everywhere you go So that thing is a business.
8:29Dana Carvey:So when something is a business, the overarching thesis is get more cash. So you're not going to send football teams to Zant. I'm not here. I'm not here. It wasn't my stuff. It wasn't my. I thought it was ice going to bust you first. You know, when you're in a comedy club and someone drops a plate of dishes, you go now hiring. everyone goes
8:59Dana Carvey:Heather's on fire Heather's fucking delirious that's why what I'm going to do at some point is do a secret overnight flight you can't find Heather you can't find Heather and then all of a sudden she shows up in my area you show up at Dana's house she'd love it do you have a sister Heather she does have sisters there but she wants to play with your horses for sure They're magic creatures Not exactly sea biscuit out there, but it's fine Maybe just partially a biscuit I think dinner roll would be the next Kentucky Derby winner That's funny Crescent Well, actually, you'll like this Because the little one, the boy Yes When he lays down in the dirt in the pasture he blends in so he's sort of yellow adorable so i started calling him dirty dan because also he kind of he's such an excited little kid that he's jumping up and down on the eeyore horse and kind of going crazy i go dirty dan but paula didn't like that name now dirty dan's good because names should sort of come by personalities well then you know he's also very adorable so we call him adorable andy your idea not my idea dnd for dirty don't stop the podcast it was sitting maybe on this i have to show you something so it was adam's birthday on heather heather so it was adam's birthday on the set at his 60th birthday so he's not adam sandler is not 60 i know and that's funny adam sandler is dried out turd is 39 no he looks good he looks good he's got his horses and cool so for his birthday the whole cast and crew dressed up like him you know that's a good easy one that everyone can kind of figure out well what well yeah are they putting on beards though or they're just wearing the bag there were two beards on two girls yeah good call huh okay well i like that image so how many people were dressed as adam like at peak like a hundred probably 90 but a hundred people i mean maybe a hundred people yeah it was the crews probably yeah we were all in because it was the whole cast in this big scene so that week this whole week was one scene where we were just all in and doing coverage of coverage And so a lot of basketball shorts, love aviator nation, bright colors, popping.
11:41Dana Carvey:I'm telling you, I think Adam's done very well with his career and finances and everything. But the Adam Sandler collection would blow up the world because it's the most comfortable clothes you can wear. It's really just wear whatever you want and then one day it'll be in style. I think he got lucky. He's like, I do what I want. I took shit for it for 10 years. Now I'm at the Met Gala. But it was pretty fun. And then he gave, it was his birthday. Of course, he's not all about his birthday, but you can't really escape. No, he doesn't. No. All there already, like it's a party already. So someone had a mariachi video.
12:21Oh. You know, he's kind of going, oh boy. There was a video. Oh, they had a Papa shot on the set.
12:27Dana Carvey:I had a running gag with Sandler about his birthday. It's just sort of a trick I play. Oh, you play him high. I play him low and then he has to correct me. I go, wow, happy 56th birthday, man. He goes, Carvey, I'm fucking 60, Carvey. Don't do this to me. No, I think you started as now. You go, Adam, you're killing it. You're 24. You're out there doing all these gigs. No, it started then. Yeah. And then he goes, I'm 28. You go, oh. You're 28. It's still good though. I guess I'm kind of a dick, basically. carby's undercut maneuver was pretty funny at us yeah i had a lot of passive aggressive sabotage you sure you can do the sketch that way okay who might have said is that what you're wearing in the sketch does that make sense oh well hey you wrote it oh here's a shirt he gave he gave us some pictures framed which was nice and look at this shirt oh that's the classic that That's the Four Horsemen.
13:30Dana Carvey:That's us backstage at the amphitheater watching a... So those four guys in that picture never did a movie together. The fact that we would all... All four in that picture never did a movie together. That's true. That's true. I mean, well, you know, we obviously would want to put Farley in these, but... Hang on. Oh, there was a display of photos of all his movies.
14:03Oh, yeah. He wears a Farley shirt in the movie. He always keeps it going.
14:10Dana Carvey:Is his character Adam Sandler in the movie or no? No. Okay. But that's why, you know, it's a little blurry because, you know, he does these things that are just kind of a wink to the audience. Yeah. Plus, it keeps Farley going. Oh, I didn't see that. That's cool. Yeah, he had some stuff up. Anyway, and then someone put tables in front of his trailer. Of course, he doesn't want all his attention on him. He gets so much anyway. So there's all these photos up. But it is 60, and we weren't going to do anything. We're going to go late. We've been going into the night. So that was fun. Your birthdays are gigantic.
14:45No, I used to do birthdays, and now I know.
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16:42Dana Carvey:That cast, Allison and Kobe and Neil and Jason and you, you were so upbeat and gung-ho. The spirit that you guys had was like, I actually thought it was like, are you mocking this? Are you being sarcastic? Follow How We Made Your Mother wherever you get your podcasts. I'm attorney Kevin Rowe. A car wreck can turn your entire life upside down. And when that happens, make one call. That's all to learn Rowe. Our local legal team is ready to go to work for you, working hard to get you the money you deserve. We'll handle the legal process so you can focus on what matters most, your recovery. From start to finish, we're here for you.
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17:35Oh, I will tell you this. I went and saw Rock's movie. Chris Rock has a new movie. I know, you directed it. I think you're going to like, yeah.
17:41Dana Carvey:I like the premise. Give me the premise again. Misty Green. Misty Green is the movie. Right. It's at the Toronto Film Festival, I think, this weekend or next. And I liked it because it was a little bit of a departure. Well, it's about Hollywood, right? Well, I thought it was just when he talked to me maybe a year or so ago. On our podcast? He said, I'm thinking about a movie where it's a girl that has a sugar daddy and then a guy cuts her off. What do you do? what do you do? You're living this semi-extravagant lifestyle with no work. And suddenly that's. Where did he get that idea? I don't know.
18:17Just from Hollywood. It's out there. It's out there.
18:20Dana Carvey:That's interesting. And he did it. And then it turned into kind of a drama. Now I would categorize it as a drama. And so I went to see it with about 15 of us. And I was like, oh my God, this is good. Plus I didn't really know what was going on. I'm like, I can't really figure out what's next. so i dug it i mean it's like it's kind of surprising like oh it surprises oh and then this will happen and you go no but it's in hollywood it's in hollywood an actress in hollywood who's also got a sugar daddy yes okay and she gets cut off and the title of the movie just for people it's going to be out soon it's called the actress and the sugar daddy right that's the title that was a working title it's called okay misty green which sounds like an old porn star i think chris said on our podcast it was going to be called sugar who sugar this sugar what daddy what sugar who daddy what that was one of the working titles we have decided that the term sugar daddy is way more known than sugar baby which is they call women that are taken care of but I don't really hear that as much.
19:31Dana Carvey:Well, what about a sugar mama? Sugar mama, I've heard. Yeah, there's plenty of women who keep a young man around. That might be the sequel. But I just wanted to give that a shout out because it was good. I think it sounds very interesting. There's so much drama and intrigue in Hollywood, as you know. Yeah. It's definitely an interesting story that's kind of an underground type of story that on the surface you don't know these things are going on. Yeah. I have an idea for a movie, but I'll tell Sandler about it. Tell me. I'm friends with him. I don't want to say it publicly because I just can't believe it hasn't been done.
20:10Dana Carvey:It's too good. It hasn't been done yet. I just can't believe it hasn't been done. You're like, it's so good. We can't do it. I can't let anyone do it. Yeah, I can't even think about it. I shouldn't even think. Oh, by the way, they put an article in Variety. And Chris, I've gotten this before. Chris. You know, Chris. It's a cool article. It's about like the movie coming out and he hasn't done press. This is like a big article about him. And on the cover, it says the comeback. And we're all like, where'd you go? Does it? No one know who you are anymore. He's like, I guess, I guess no one remembers me.
20:44And now I'm coming back. What? He never left. But it is kind of a dig tight. You know what I mean? They shouldn't say that. Everyone knows Chris Rock.
20:52Dana Carvey:There's no such thing as a comeback with Chris Rock because his base. He's always doing something. His baseline is a global phenomenon standup. And then he can go, he's done tons of movies, directed them. But the comeback, I mean, was it two years ago when he did his special live and we watched at the Comedy Store? So I call that a silly title. It's a hooky title to anger some. It angered me. What would they, if I did anything, they'd go, they'd say something revived or back from the dead. What if it said in small letters, do we need this comeback?
21:37Dana Carvey:Well, what was the rapper had a song called, don't call it a comeback. Don't call it a comeback. I've been here for years. Who was that? Fluffy. LL Cool J. LL Cool J. Don't call it a comeback. Fluffy. He started saying fluffy. Fluffy G Fluffy Chevrolet Easy E, Dizzy D, Busy B Busy B Just B Oh this rapper's out Recently, B or not to be Oh I will Say how I got burned on the set I have probably three different stuntmen Why we don't know Well because you don't move the way you used to I have one for eating I'm so creaky You're going to come off 28 in this movie i know no i had to i had to uh well for different things because we have different you know there's stunts here and there and they just go they don't want you to do anything but then they kind of make you do everything well we got to get your face in it somewhere so they wanted to have you to do as they want you to do as much as i basically do the whole stunt in pieces after they told me i'm not doing anything yeah so i'm standing at this we're at this amusement park and it's a night shoot and everyone's kind of leaning back and i'm leaning and one of the extras is a woman probably like you know 30 may or may not know me she's standing there she's running the operation like the you know the ball throw and i'm just leaning there and she's behind it but i'm leaning on it so i don't really see her and then she goes hey and she looks directly across me and leaning facing me is my stuntman and so we're dressed exactly the same and he looks like me and she's like, hey, can I ask you a question?
23:19Are you a guy in the movie or are you the stuntman? And I go, oh, I'm a guy in the movie. She goes, you are? I go, yeah. She didn't see the call sheet. No, because she's out of two of us, she's guessing. Do we have a picture of your doppelanger? a picture he looks pretty much the same he looks cooler but the burn was well it seems the guy over there has more charm and charisma and you have the personality of a platter of piss so why why are you
23:57Dana Carvey:the star so she's a very uh expressive yeah first she was so she was so floored because she thought i was gonna go i'm the stunt man i'm this guy over there is obviously the star you can tell from just looking at him. But she's looking at me like, you're the guy in the movie? You have a big, she said, do you have a big part? I said, I have a pretty big, I have a, yeah, I'm in it a lot. She's like, oh, okay. So she, A, doesn't know me, and then, which is fine, but B, it got borderline insulting when she starts going. Because she could tell my personality was just flatlined. She's like, so do you, you don't need any star qualities anymore to be in a movie?
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24:38I know, that's a good, I'll send you the picture on the chat.
24:41Dana Carvey:She seems kind of critical. This is her on the set. This is Station 7. We have an imposter here, says he's in the movie. Yeah. Yeah. He doesn't look like he's a movie actor. By the way. He's not funny at all. Send help. Exactly. She knew not enough to even not. She thought I was just another extra, I think. But I was dressed like the other guy, so she knew I was somebody. And then, but the funniest terminology is Farley's dad. He used to say, you still going out with that ginger? And Chris goes, no, we broke up. Good. She had the personality of a platter of piss, if you ask me. Oh, I see. Isn't that a hilarious term?
25:24It's so fucking rude.
25:26Dana Carvey:I get this sometimes. Someone will creep up to me at some event and go, hey, are you somebody? Or are you nobody? Are you nobody? Yeah. Are you somebody? You seem like a nobody No, I'm nobody Do you know David Spade? Nobody knows David Spade, he lives in a castle Did you ever give your great idea to Adam Sandler? You're like, I haven't yet Yeah, and it's not for me I have a part for you in it And I have a part for Heather Greg does a cameo But yeah You better give a part to Chris Rock, he's making a comeback come back from what i know chris i go chris i see how you gave yourself a nice juicy little party thing i know what i'm doing i think it's well i think it's very cool that you'll like this does all this stuff you know and it's good he's been working on this one for a while i think it was it was low money because probably four million so it's not like a super flashy movie but i think it'll get attention because a it's a little bit of a twist for him to be in the drama and i thought it was well done and chris wrote the screenplay i think he co-wrote it yeah co-wrote it and he directs it yeah and he's a co-star in it and the girl that's the lead i don't have her name in front of me but she's she's technically an unknown in quotes which just means you probably haven't heard of her i do see the pictures she does a great job don't We're not supposed to show it?
27:00Oh, sorry. I mean, I don't think we're allowed to.
27:04Dana Carvey:No, my screen was blurry. Don't worry. We can cut that part out. Luckily, there's a thousand fingerprints on your screen. Oh, geez. I'm so glad I didn't show the picture. But yeah, you guys look like. We'll pixelate it, even though no one cares at all. But they're like. Oh, no, that's the Pentagon is being notified. We get an email once a week. Hey, guys, remember. Obviously, someone screwed up. no posting anything about the movie. Is this movie going to be a smash? Am I talking to someone who's going to be in a movie that's going to top a billion minutes? I mean, could this compete with the wrong Missy?
27:43Well, I think it hopefully should because I don't know about minutes, but it has a quadrillion seconds.
27:51Dana Carvey:Well, let me just ask you a personal question. Please. are you in this movie are you going are you going to bring it you will know me because i mean there's a lot of people in the movie so it's spread around a lot but i'm definitely in a lot of stuff and some scenes are like let's go this way are you bringing it um i've brought it and i will bring it we're about halfway to be honest we haven't gone to italy yet oh man have I talked to you 20 years ago and you go oh we haven't been to Italy I know I want to be one of those people because everyone on Instagram is in fucking Italy or Greece no Italy is awesome and you know the idea that you're getting paid to go do a cool movie and you get to see Italy just take a moment take a knee and go I really have taken it in I have take a knee for a second Jersey Mike's buying two bags of chips I don't give a shit anymore Look, I'll be honest with you.
28:53Dana Carvey:In Italy, things don't work quite as well as they do in America. With things, you got to kind of - I've heard that bullshit. I've heard there's no Diet Cokes. I'm in a full fucking panic. God, you and Trump with the Diet Coke. Jeez. It's a Diet Pepsi world and I'm getting sick of it. Pepsi's too sweet. Everybody knows that. Sick of the discrimination, yeah. Pepsi's too sweet. You got to go with Coca-Cola. Well, I will tell you that - I can't remember But I'm excited to go Oh I was going to say You should come and say it's for the podcast Then you write it all off If I Yeah I would do it just to Just to scare everybody Yeah just come out Hey the Garth guy Wait why is he taking over the movie The Garth guy is here I just saw the GG Garth guy Yeah get a wig Like slap it on them and have them run through in the background.
29:54And then you write it off. You take one selfie with me. We do the podcast, but we do it in different rooms.
30:01Dana Carvey:Well, this is probably not fair, but I've actually been developing a parallel movie. And it's Kevin Nealon and I and Lovitz. Lovitz. And it's not like your guys' movie, but it's called All Growed Up. And we're just at that age where we're really grown up. Things have changed. Even more grown up than the other guys you've heard of. Yeah. Yeah, that's a good idea. We're going to call it grown ups part four. But then Gervin said, you can't do that. Hey, listen. You can't take that right there. At the end of the day, nobody put a gun to your head. Jeez, that should be. Remember that one when he goes, you should do the movie.
30:41You should do it. You should do it. It bombs. Mark, tell me to do it. Hey, at the end of the day, nobody put a gun to your head.
30:48Dana Carvey:God, it's a little cryptic To use those kind of No one stuck a sword in your side Yeah No one put a noose around your neck It's your funeral Nobody put a grenade in your pants When I did Caesars last weekend I got out of here and went And then came back So I was a little beat up from that But Nicky, Kyle Dunnigan, we all did Caesars Wait a minute, oh wait a minute Was Kyle Dunnigan the opener? yeah he's great so well because i read some of the reviews you got great you all got great reviews reviews yeah oh boy oh i've read like 15 of them they're all good oh good they love we had a good set especially saturday was great but they didn't know the name and a few of them said in that opener was really good now i know is kyle dunn again as an opener i know he just does it for fun because he likes to hang out he goes out with nicky a lot and he was uh yeah he's hard to follow He's great.
31:44Dana Carvey:I mean, that's a pretty, he's not an opening act. The guy in the back, that crew guy goes, is this the guy that does Bill Maher? I go, yeah, really? Please, okay. You're going to Italy. No one put a gun to your head. A white guy catches a break. Okay. Oh, please. Oh, please. It's kind of like Lauren and Bill kind of have a similar, So I was going to talk about crime in LA and about all the break-ins. I can't even talk. It's just there's no crime. There's no punishment. There's no nothing. Hey, man. You know. LA is almost pro-crime at this point. This is what, these are big statements. Don't. Well, it's.
32:33It swings so far the other way of like, make sure everyone's great to the criminals and make sure.
32:40Dana Carvey:here's the main thing i like that somebody i like to go back to the core so you try to dissect this for a second i know you're kind of tired but yeah um do you p do you believe that all people are born all human beings are born good i feel yes okay because of situations sure things go bad Or that they have to, it's a learned behavior. They have to learn to play well with others and learn to follow the rules. But if all people are born good, then if they're robbing a grocery store, then society let them down because they started out good. Partially. So that's the idea of making the perpetrator the victim.
33:28Dana Carvey:It might be a little too sophisticated. But you also know good from bad. And there's things I do. You could make your life easy. But when I see the stores in LA and people are working hard, the difference is when I see people going to McDonald's on that small level and start pushing people around, knocking around, tearing up the fucking place, punching people, and no one does anything and they leave because they act so tough, nothing happens to them. I want one of those places to put a sign up that says, we fight back because they're not allowed to do anything. But you're going to places where people are trying to have a job, trying to work, trying to do what the hardest thing in the world is, drop the cool act and work and then these people come in i want to fight them and act cool and film it and just like hey man the people that have jobs are working are trying are at a disadvantage because you don't want to disrupt your whole life so you don't want to fight back you don't want trouble man claiming holly own vision may have been squatting yeah the new thing is trying to break in have parties at houses and then they they're doing it in the valley and and uh above sunset strip that they beat up people they come in and they get in the houses david who is it someone's calling they get in the houses and then they either they're just trespassing so they just get a tap on the wrist they don't even go to jail even if they break in the house and then but if they stay they can squat and then it's a whole another problem you can't get them out so that's a problem going on in town i i know an actual story like this uh heard from someone so this very successful producer hollywood hills home thinks someone's rings the bell comes through the gate comes in the house uh unannounced to say it's some dude takes his clothes off and gets in the hot tub yeah so this guy's hot tub yeah the guy goes upstairs calls the police the police come two hours later of course take the guy away da da da da da okay thank you very much two hours later from that the guy's back yeah it was a misdemeanor so the guy's back of the house so the guy keeps harassing him so the guy has to move into a hotel in town and i don't know the end of the story well that's what's going on i'm hearing a lot about that and so they did an article about like these people because the cops just go hey they're just trespassing which in the old days someone gets in your house or in your gate in your front yard or pounding in your door or trying to knock it open with a rock you go oh i'm gonna break their legs this is an attack this is well they said no you're you're in the wrong you are in the wrong this guy's in the right and they don't even arrest if it's trespassing they just say not in texas texas has a law called hold your ground so if some if somebody comes in your house you have the right to yeah i mean i like that better i mean do something but they just run the show and like you said they'll kick them out but they'll come back and they're like they know the laws so they're like yeah when i do things like that like i did break into your house in la and i just i squatted for about two days they don't have to leave either because now it's your fault you've got to get a lawyer you got to find a way to squat then look at your buddy has to get a hotel like what what's it's such an upside down cake world i don't understand it uh let's bring the hammer back uh okay i'll get worked up um dana i agree let's do buzzing around everyone's clamoring everyone's asking we haven't done it they're starving starving for starving okay okay i'm going to this part i have to read it to you We do this every time and I'm not ready every single time.
37:13Dana Carvey:We're never, we're, this is, I'm just thinking of it right now. I have, I've kind of. By the way, no one's accused us of being overprepared for this. Well, that's the greatness of it. I do like the looseness of it. If it's bad, it's entertaining. If it's good, it's entertaining because it's not poured over or tried to make perfect. No. I got a couple of your suggestions. What I want to do is have Christopher Walken and John Wayne and Walter Brennan talking about AI. AI. Yeah, you know that it's time for buzzing around, folks. Applause, applause. Sponsored by 5-Hour Energy's new caramel. Do you say caramel?
38:06I say caramel, but it's caramel apple flavor. Dive into caramel apples straight from the orchard for a sugar-free fall treat. Ooh, right in time for fall. Find caramel apple shots for a limited time online at www.5hourenergy.com or Amazon on today and this is where dana has three characters and he does jokes puts them in a
38:35Dana Carvey:scenario yeah it doesn't it's most might be more interesting than a you know than funny what are you talking about okay here we are christopher walken is talking about the threat of AI to John Wayne and Walter Brennan. So I don't, with buzzing around, I don't want to show the pictures, but for people at home that are watching this, this is John Wayne. I'll allow it. I mean, and Walter Brennan was his sidekick. Okay, so first Walken's talking to him. Walken's Walken talking. done now, but AI taking over machines. Extinction. Taking out mankind. Mankind. Foo Fighters. I have a cold too, by the way.
39:30Oh, you do? You sound pretty good.
39:32Dana Carvey:Really? Give me a second.
39:37Damn it.
39:38Dana Carvey:He shouldn't come on the damn podcast with a goddamn cold. You're getting all the puppets sick. Getting the puppets. I don't know. Afraid, scared, AI, hacking agents taking over. They're autonomous. What can we do? They're autonomous? Autonomous. Autonomous. You say it. Autonomous. I like it. I just didn't know if I heard it right. Well, I'm not. There's nothing an AI can do to me that my Winchester 74 would take care of. No, you can't shoot an AI. It's inside a computer. It's a little chip going around. Good point. Can't find it. Well, I'm not afraid of an AI. Are you, Pappy? You're a Duke. I'm scared.
40:25Dana Carvey:I'm scared. I can't understand what they're doing, Duke. Well, take it easy, Pappy. Don't make me do what I did last time. What'd you do last time? Yeah, what happened? Well, I don't want to talk about it. I'm just saying anybody who's afraid of an AI is a panty waste. Panty waste, haven't heard that in a while. You got to be strong against this AI. Where can I get it and when can I shoot it? You can't, Duke. You can't shoot it. It's invisible. It goes everywhere. Well, shut up, Pappy. You keep hitting that whiskey. I'll keep slapping you around. Christopher Walken, what do you think? Well, got to be careful.
41:12Dana Carvey:These agents, they go rogue. They go into another machine, take over. And AI agents killed themselves. Right, Trump? That's Trump. How do you do Trump now? You're tired of him. okay that was sponsored that was buzzing around you know who really liked it this guy sponsored by oh mandami he's happy about everything yeah mandami's new caramel apple flavor caramel apple five hour energy shots deliver sweet and tart apple hits with a smooth buttery caramel coated finish. Treat yourself to a crisp apple bite and smooth caramel delight with a caramel apple, 5-Hour Energy shot, only available online for a limited time at 5-HourEnergy.com or Amazon.
42:09Dana Carvey:Baked a cake. Cut my finger. Wow. Yes, chef.
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43:29That's W-A-Y-F-A-I-R.com. Wayfair, every style, every home. We all have those hero little items in our closet we reach for every morning. The basics, the effortless pieces that make getting dressed completely foolproof. For me, Quince is always in the mix. It's the Quince Mongolian Cashmere V-Neck in Oatmeal. I was blown away by how juicy and plush and thick the knit felt for the price. Instantly became a go-to layer for work or weekend errands. Quince specializes in high-quality, timeless wardrobe staples crafted from luxury materials like 100 % Mongolian cashmere, organic cotton, Monero wool.
44:15They offer everything from tailored trousers to soft fitted tees and performance active wear built to last.
44:21Dana Carvey:Unbelievably, their flagship cashmere sweaters start at just$60. Quince cuts out conventional retail markup and works directly with the top tier ethical factories, pricing all their products 50 to 80 % lower than luxury competitors. Plus, they extend that same incredible value to hotel-grade bedding, plush bath linens, and home goods. Find your next fall favorites at Quince. Download the Quince app for app-exclusive offers or go to quince.com slash fly. Get free shipping on your order and 365-day returns now available in Canada and the UK, too. That's quince.com slash fly. Hey, before we jump back into the show, let's take a quick break, all right?
45:10Not just any break. This is a refreshing break with Snapple. We all know about Snapple's iconic real facts. So let's take a minute to go over some of my faves.
45:20Dana Carvey:Snapple real fact 455. Movie trailers used to come on at the end of the movies, but no one stuck around to watch them. I've heard that. Snapple real fact 831. Adults laugh only about 15 to 100 times a day, while preschoolers laugh an average of 300 times a day. Snapple Real Fact, 1983. The first player drafted to play pro football never played in the league. That's interesting. Snapple Real Fact, 1274. Kickball is referred to as soccer baseball in some parts of Canada. Hmm. So, grab a Snapple. Take a second. Enjoy the moment. Because let's be honest, this might be the most refreshing part of your day.
46:04Snapple, make your break more interesting.
46:11Okay, now we'll go to stories. We've got time for a few more. Let's do a few. A few stories. What's in the news?
46:18Dana Carvey:We need a theme here or something. Oh, yeah. This has been a little played out, but you know what this is. This is the unruly passenger who was arrested. This guy's life is F-U-C-K at this point.
46:32Dana Carvey:I saw this. You don't see on a plane every day. The two passengers had to duct tape this man to his seat. I guess the funniest part is the amount of tape. Yes, because we don't get to see the whole process of the tape. On the flight back, I asked if they had duct tape. And they said, we don't on the other airline. They do. So this airline has duct tape. And I don't know why they have it, but maybe it's for this. But this guy will sue him because the duct tape probably pulled his eyebrows off or something. And again, the criminal is the victim. Well, he also apparently, I don't know if this is true.
47:15Dana Carvey:It's Apple TV and he's in development for a show called Duct Tape Man. And it's kind of like a superhero thing. With duct tape, he can do anything. I thought he can only be held down by duct tape. I'm like, that's anybody though. Well, I've flown a Scottish airline once, and a guy was all unruly and drinking. Unruly. I'm going over here. You can't tell me what to do. And they had to, all they had was Scotch tape. And it took them the entire - Is he Scottish? Yeah. So they did the exact same thing, but just with Scotch tape. And it took hours to get him really bound, you know. I like that you put that together.
47:55Dana Carvey:And then I went that far with it. Yeah, you put it together fast, though. Yeah, okay. Yeah, I did ask them other things, and they said, because the whole flight, across my aisle, the window was open, and it was a blazing Lasik light in my face, sideways, which is worse. And they said, oh, we can't do anything. If you have the window, you have control of that. If you have the middle, you're allowed to have both armrests. Did you know that? I didn't know those rules. Oh, yeah? I bugged someone on an airplane once. I felt bad about it because usually everyone's got the windows down, right? Yeah. So Paul and I fly out of Hawaii and we thought it was going to be a smooth flight.
48:36Dana Carvey:There's two storms merging in our paths. So everybody get buckled in. They're about to fuck. So we're bucking and bucking and bucking and everyone's got their windows down. But for me, because I'm a nervous flyer, I would open up the window to try to see if we're hitting us, you know, a cell or if it's clearing up. Yeah. So I opened and closed that window for about five hours. And everyone hated you? No, no one said a word to me. I was quiet about it. But at the end of the flight, she goes, yeah, yeah. You sure opened the window a lot, didn't you? Yeah. Like a fucking strobe light. Oh, I'm sorry.
49:10Dana Carvey:Did that bother? You should have told me I would have stopped. Oh, I would have in one second. Yeah. Yeah. You opened it a lot. No, it's a wonderful thing to, you know, have the banging window notion, you know, play$2 ,900.
49:25All right, next one. Next one. Thank you. Really got some good stuff. Definitely not the loudest. Wait, definitely saved the loudest. Someone told me I need glasses. I'm like, these are one millionth of an inch high. The words. Oh, look at this kid. This is a feel good story. Okay, kick this board, lady. Okay. She gives a cute bow. Too cute.
49:52Did she break it?
50:03Time to get her to kick it.
50:04Dana Carvey:Oh, she did it. Look at how excited. I've never been this excited in my life. See, that's. Look, he makes her yell again. He goes louder. That's like it's a superpower. Like she could knock over kids with it. Look at how funny. I know. That's that age. She's probably two and a half. Oh, the Grinch has a heart. We like those ones. We mix them up with the - Too cute. I love the high pitch and it is kind of like a superpower. Very adorable. Reminds me of me. Well, wait, hold on a second because my glasses, I don't have the right ones. That wasn't you? Yeah. I'm going to wear my hair in a ponytail.
50:44Dana Carvey:Yeah, I thought you just had a thing or maybe it was part of Grown Ups 4. Grown Ups 4. all grown up starring john lovitz growing up and starting to wither a bit over the hill the back nine what's wrong with a bit a bit of gray yeah you guys got to do one when you're 90 uh okay next one next one next one we got we're on a roll dude killing this unbelievable oh this guy that thinks he can fight a chimp i think he could win you know why dana this guy thinks he can fight a chimp and he's strong but the chimp here's my theory the chimp doesn't know it's coming so you put him in a cage he doesn't have time to get mad he's just like oh a human i clown these guys all the time and this guy's gonna hit him so hard so fast and it's a portal chimp here just play it well you'll get a see let me see we're about to witness a man fight a chimpanzee.
51:43So this TikToker made a video saying he would destroy a chimpanzee in a 1v1 and said, Hey, give me 500 grand and I'll fucking do it. Now this dude's about 5 '9", 5 '10". Look at that, he is strong. 200 pounds, he wrestles and grapples. And so after that video got close to 5 million views, he got an offer from someone to fight a chimpanzee. Now he said he can't disclose what country this is going to happen in, but they even made a website and you can see right there, this is really going to happen. They are giving this dude 500 grand to fight a I think he'll beat him. Live on stream. Based off what he said, this chimpanzee was apparently attacking a bunch of people, was just a troublemaker, and they were about to put the chimpanzee on death row.
52:19They're going to put him in the main cage. And we'll see how it fucking goes. I mean, this is just fucking insane. I don't know if you guys remember back then, all those debates. 100 men versus one gorilla. Obviously, a chimpanzee is nowhere near a gorilla. It's very hokey. No, no. It's still a mismatch, in my opinion. The one area where chimps are extremely strong is their pulling, their grip strength. So he gets a hold of this dude's arms. Bro, he might be fucking. All I'm going to say is they better be ready to take out that shit. The chimps are going to make him put him in a chair and make him watch him screw his girlfriend.
52:48We don't know 100 % if this dude's actually going to follow through and do this. But if he does, he's a fucking legend. This dude said he wants to feel everything that she's capable of.
52:57Dana Carvey:Okay, well, first of all, chimpanzees are vicious. They're not cute. Chimpanzees, gang of chimpanzees. They will go over and eat the faces And destroy a whole other tribe of chimpanzees And then they'll have their way with them sexually And they're tearing They'll eat your face in a second That guy, I hope it's worth it I know What if he gets his face eaten off on live TV? Well then Good Heather says good Well, because he's hurting a cute little monkey Well, why fight a monkey who didn't start living? Well, why fight a monkey? It's just somewhere in nature. But if it's, they said they were going to euthanize the monkey for bullying the other chimps.
53:43Yeah. That's what they say. A likely story.
53:48Dana Carvey:Jeez, the main thing you got to know is there's a consistent personality. You know, it's just, there's a chimp change, you know, they call it. And they never do change. All I could come up with in the moment. What about the chimp change? Remember Dennis used to say chimp change? Catcher's mask around their face. What are those called? Orangutans? Oh, those, yeah. You know, those is like the weird one in Planet of the Apes. He's like, I'm the wise old one with a weird face. The stuff that's on this planet, really. I just have three questions for the audience and do it in the comments. How did the earth get here?
54:22Dana Carvey:What are we doing here with all these freaky animals and stuff? And what is the reason? What's our purpose? Don't ask that. You'll go crazy. Just ride it out. Just three questions. I'm sure someone would give us a good answer. What do you think on earth is actually an alien that we don't even notice or care? An octopus? They can change color. They can open things. They're smart. Why does it have to be a small gray or a tall gray? You have to say aliens can be any of these weird things around us or in the ocean. Well, aliens just depends on your point of view. We're aliens. Yeah, you're an alien.
54:58Dana Carvey:Yeah. No, you're the most alien. You're a reptilian. You're the most alien guy I've ever seen in my life. I've seen some aliens. Oh my God, that's so rude. Why is an alien a negative thing? You're saying that because I'm so smart, you think I'm an alien. An alien could be cute and cuddly, like E.T., or an alien can be like with Akila Akila, you know, on an alien where Sigourney Weaver is in white panties trying to get in the space suit, and under her breath she's going, Akila Akila, Akila Akila. What does that mean? I don't know, I think she was just trying to psych herself up. She says that in the movie?
55:33Dana Carvey:Yeah, the alien's in the pod. She thought she's getting in a pod and getting away at the end of the movie. Oh, no, an alien pod is worse than dead pods. And she's getting in there, and she's trying to get into her spacesuit, and she sees the alien's just there, and she's panicking. So I think under her breath she's going, I kill, I kill, I kill, I kill, I kill, I kill, I kill. Because then he has to hit a thing where she can stay in the pod, and the alien gets blasted out. Alien checks out that bullshit. Sorry for all that information. So we have 37 ads to read. so okay you want to wrap it up did you think we had a good show i do i do um i think we got we covered a lot covered a lot plus we got next week uh and um it's good to see you uh but everyone watch this leave really nice comments and have fun making the movies oh yeah try to have fun See you at the movies.
56:28Dana Carvey:I'm going to get some popcorn, and I'm going to the first matinee. Oh, wait. It's on Netflix. Sorry. I'm going to get some popcorn and turn on the TV. I don't even know when it comes out yet. I'm going to have some popcorn ready for when it comes out. I'm going to put on Netflix, get the lights down nice, and watch my friends make me laugh. Right after I watch the Philadelphia Eagles in Morocco. Go. It's a peculiar American sport where they're playing in Tahiti at the height of the heat wave. All right. That's a good thing. Maybe we should stay in the more temperate climates when we're talking about 300 pound linemen gear.
57:13Mason Dixon. All right. Thanks, Dan. Bye.
57:21All right, listen, if you're enjoying The Fly on the Wall, of course, hopefully you are, click follow. We don't want to be desperate, but obviously smash that goddang button on your favorite podcast app. Leave a review, a good one. Leave a five-star rating, nothing else. Whoops. And maybe even share an episode with a friend. If you're watching this episode on YouTube, please subscribe, Dana. What do you think?
57:45Dana Carvey:I'm going to tell you this right now. Hear me now, believe me later. Fly on the Wall, believe it or not, is presented by Odyssey. And executive produced by, hold for it, Dana Carvey and David Spade. Or David Spade and Dana Carvey. We don't write this stuff. Heather Santoro, Greg Holtzman, and Leah Reese Dennis. The show is edited by Evan Cox. With production support from Phil Sweet Tech. Talent production and booking by Sophia Lepore.
From the publisher
Dana and David are discussing the 49ers/Rams game and the ramifications of jet lag, Adam Sandler’s birthday, and Chris Rock’s new movie “Misty Green”. Also stunt work, squatters, and Buzzing Around.