John Leguizamo: From The Ice Age To The Odyssey

0:00Because I was the flavor that they were looking for, sort of like a ghetto hood. You know, I had to be working against that because, you know, my acting teachers when I was 17, they were all like, no one can understand you with that accent. Do you really speak that way? Good God. I was like, yo, man, what you want? What you need from me? I'll be right there for you, bro. What's up? You know, I used to talk like that. It was so dope because they thought it was going to be a bomb. They thought Ice Age was going to be a serious bomb. They had closed down Fox animation because they thought it was over.

0:34Like, I'm not joking. They thought it was over. There was no merchandise, no advertising. This shit came a turn out. It blew up. Cut the balls. Work the shaft. Cut the ball. That's right out of my playbook. All right, we have a gentleman on here. Yes.

0:55Dana Carvey:You're a gentleman. But so is our guest. Yeah, I'm a gent. I was in a club in high school called Gents. Would you like to be referred to as a gent or a class act? David Spade, he's a gent. David Spade, he's a class act. Most of the time I get David Spade, he's a buffoon. But that's common now you're called a buffoon. You know my last name is Spade? You know this, right? Yes. It's not showbiz. It's very real. So when I played tennis in high school, I always wanted to be called the spade of ace. That was like in the nickname, like in the Saguaro saber cap paper, like spade of ace wins again. But the only thing that caught on was pinky dick.

1:43Dana Carvey:I don't want to think about that. How did this turn in? How were you not named ace of middle name? Oh, of ace of spades. I don't know how people miss my middle name could have been UV H of spade but we're not here to talk about that we're not here to talk about that we're here to talk about John Leguizamo John Leguizamo he's a good dude I've met probably very briefly in the past but very aware of him you know being in the comedy world and someone's out there doing one man shows he was ruling HBO there for a while he has a new show John Leguizamo does America, and he gets into a lot of very interesting things.

2:30You know, he's just in a different world than us. We're just straight stand-ups, and he's like a one-man performer, writer.

2:35Dana Carvey:Yeah, he does one-man shows, and yeah, he's been a fixture. I'm just going to use the word fixture in American entertainment. Theater, movies, television. Yeah, he works. Tu Wong Fu. Remember that one with Patrick Swayze? Patrick Swayze, and who else? Wesley Snipes, I think. Anyway, very interesting movie in the day, probably 20 years ago. But he's always sort of pushing the envelope and doing things so. Yeah, very creative. Great to have a chat with this dude. And here he is right now. John Leguizamo. It happened to me when I was doing Smart List. They said, download Chrome an hour later with two guys on the thing.

3:13Dana Carvey:And finally punted. Not going to happen. Did it later. But yeah. You guys got on Zoom. That was good. That was like special. I know. what's wrong with zoom zoom never hurt anyone why does everyone hate it yeah they fucking hate it why do people hate zoom why are they hating on zoom there's no need to be hating on zoom none zoom got us here zoom no need to be hating on zoom i mean zoom walks the streamer can run right zoom got us like we don't have to go meet directors in person anymore we don't have to talk to anybody in person anymore i mean zoom saved our you know our lack when i when i talk to directors i go can i just not get the job from here and they're like yeah i'll just say no here if you want to have a fake meeting i do want the fake meeting but then afterwards like the free food i'm not gonna lie i like the free food and if i'm a big fan of the director i like meeting them in person so i can just yeah that brag you know what i mean what's what's that like being in person i mean what happens you go you see him in a room or i i'm just on virtual so no i mean like i just met chris nolan for the odyssey we met it we met at the audion you know the big uh uh 90s hollywood new york uh restaurant and we sat for two hours we chatted talked about life his biography mine and then i did the odyssey well wait a minute first of all he's a genius That's a huge, huge, huge movie.

4:44Dana Carvey:That's not just a regular director to me. I mean, my God. Dunkirk, Interstellar. I mean, what is Odyssey about? I've heard about it, but what is it about and what are you doing in it? Not allowed to say a lot, but I'll try to talk around it. But I can't, you know, obviously the Odyssey, the Homer, 800 BC piece. He's doing it, period. period and matt damon's in it and tom holland and anne hathaway robert pattinson an incredible cast and it's period it's a beautiful i mean he's a visionary i mean that i mean if i would have done that on zoom it would have been all right i mean i was sure i still got the part but being in person to be to have that that sort of um vibrations happen between you and it's wild i I mean, it's a big difference.

5:34Well, it's like being on a date. It's different just talking. But when you get in the same room, you go, I can get a feel for someone. I can, you know, there's, you're right. There's a vibe, there's an energy, there's something going on or not going on. Right, like pick as opposed to like having it there in person. Exactly. I always have one ready for a director in case it comes up.

5:55Dana Carvey:Yeah. But you're just meeting, right? You were just, you don't, do you audition anymore? I mean, you've done a hundred movies from what I understand. minimum oh yeah yeah i've done i i i don't audition i don't audition but i do have to meet yeah that's fair meet up with people i i guess especially like nolan has an incredible um asshole limit so no he doesn't he wants to meet people to just to vet the assholes he doesn't want to work with people who are and that's my new fucking barometer you know you get to a certain age i just don't want to deal with motherfucking assholes or or egomaniacs or sociopaths just don't want to do that anymore no i think you get to a certain point in your career like nolan where he can pick and choose and on the way up you do have to work with assholes that's just for all of us that's just the way it is and then it's certain at some if things are going good enough you get to say i don't want to do that when i've heard they're a drag or you know have a meeting and say are you a fucking drag or not because i can't do this it's so hard anyway oh my god it's so true are you gonna be a fucking pain in my ass the most miserable experience i've ever had or are you gonna play ball and make me shine motherfucker the biggest one is when you realize the director resents you because the studio forced you on them and they hate you the entire time and are really actively trying to sabotage you have you had that john no i've never had that i'm not at that level but i've seen it happen i've seen it several times when when the director wanted a real artist you know austria and the studio didn't want to go they wanted to go with some name star yeah yeah but i wouldn't even say star would they consider or a name, maybe a lot of followers, which doesn't lead to good acting.

7:50I don't know how to get good acting from just having a lot of followers, but you know how bullshit the studio system is. You know, I had a meeting, John, where they said, you're kind of a name and you have a lot of followers, but you're not talented. I go, listen, we're not going to get everything. So let's just do this. Two out of three is... It's not... Meatloaf said it.

8:11Dana Carvey:You're not funny. You can't act. You can't sing. but those instagram followers wow yeah yeah yeah that's that's the majority of that talent pool not to diss them but to diss them yeah or they say we get a big star and surround them with tiktokers right that tricky formula of like you have this demo they have this demo and together it will collapse basically it makes no sense i mean it makes no sense talent is talent for a reason and then influencers i mean i it's a necessity of our our modern world but not something i go to i have a quick question when you were younger weren't you in regarding henry oh you got to bring that up didn't you is that bad bring it down well you know i i was kind of humiliated by it i mean i did it only because i wanted because i got no jobs i I mean, there were no jobs for Latin folk.

9:10They just weren't. I mean, I don't know if you remember the Ross report, because that's how desperate I was. I would get the Ross report, which managers and agents got. Okay. But there was no opportunities. So you get every Monday and they would list everything that was available in moving television, every role. But it was like Jim Crow. I'm not going to lie. It was like white doctor, white lawyer, white husband, white lover, Latino drug dealer. and and then i would ask my agent please can they see me i want to do my my monologue from david mamet sexual person chicago please they'll fall in love with me they wouldn't they wouldn't even see you so you know you have to be mad resourceful you just had to be to try to get in that room with

9:53Dana Carvey:folks well did freddie what did freddie prince mean to you if anything or paul rodriguez as i came up i always thought it was kind of weird oh there's a latino comic and there's one of them or too you know uh but he was a force of nature were you in your formative years when freddie was around oh yeah i mean i mean he's way older than i am but as a kid to watch him on and chico and the man was like my god the only latino on television at the time i mean we had desi arnaz but he was in the 50s they say every two decades we'll throw one out there yeah that's the thing is that when i saw uh chico and the man i guess as a kid it was just another funny show so i would have thought looking back hey maybe they should give more than uh latinos a chance because this one's working really well this this show is very funny it fit right in no one said a word it was just like oh another funny show without even separating it it was like hey whoever's funny throw them out there because talent is talented people here with your black latino they just want to see great shows but they just weren't casting us so when i got regarding henry it was a drug dealer i shoot this white guy and it was like oh my god i'm perpetrating what what they want to see which is negative latino images and i didn't want to participate in that but i really wanted to meet mike nichols because he's one of the greats i mean the show virginia wolf the graduate carnal knowledge some of my favorite films yeah i did it because of that but then you know there I am with my half, my sloppy fro and I'm in the drug store.

11:30I mean, in the bodega and Harrison Ford and I, and I'm robbing the place or even talking about it just gives me. Right. And I, I'm sorry about that. I just sort of was like Harrison Ford, Mike Nichols. I was looking at that angle, like to be on a set with them when you're younger must've been in some ways other than what you're describing, obviously it's kind of a sore subject, but just interesting to see them on a real set and how it works. Oh yeah, of course. I mean, just to be anywhere near Mike Nichols and Harrison Ford is always, when he sees me, he's so lovely, you know, and I'm like, oh wow, that's, he's such a great dude to be around these folks, you know, but.

12:09Dana Carvey:I love Harry Ford. I do. I really, I enjoy Harry Ford and Mikey Nichols. You're the guy from the bodega. Did anyone ever say to you, John, can you Latin it up a little more? yeah yeah they didn't have to say that to me as much because i i i was the flavor that they were looking for sort of like a ghetto hood yeah you know i had working against that because you know my acting teachers when i was 17 they were all like uh no one can understand you with that accent do you really speak that way and uh good god talk like you know i was like this i was like that yo man what you want what you need from me i'll be right there for you bro what's up you I used to talk like that, and you don't really hear that anymore.

12:54There you go. That's what we're looking for. That's our man right there. Yeah. They throw down the sound, man. This is the person that I've become. You play the Spanish squirrel in Ice Age. Yeah. What's going on? By the way, very funny.

13:17Dana Carvey:What is a sloth? It's a sloth. dude ice age is a killer i did research and the research and because i give the guy like a thousand voices i was like you know like what if he's from shashi station and he talked like this and he said what if he's from the deep south and you talk like he goes nah i said what if what if he's heard and talking like this and uh so i did research on the discovery channel and i got all this footage on on sloths and they store the food and they cheap pound fish you know and it ferments. Oh, great. And I was like, oh my God, this is my character. And it's a hit. Yeah, Ice Age is such a smash.

13:59That's great. My celebrity worth. It's 90 % of your celebrity on Google.

14:06Dana Carvey:I'm fascinated by celebrity net worth. Not that, but what did you get for the first Ice Age? What percentage more did you get for the sequel? it was dope it was so dope because they thought it was going to be a bomb they thought ice age was going to be a serious bomb they had closed down fox uh animation because they thought it was over like i'm not joking they thought it was over there was no merchandise no advertising this shit or not it would blew up it was so huge and and then when they wanted to come back for us for number two we got i took them to the cleaners yeah the best position to be in did you actually indicate to them that this is my number or i don't do the sequel because your character was essential at that point i believe oh yeah no we negotiated hard man i got i bought a country house uh i bought a massive apartment i bought a pool good god jesus i bought a pool Do you have any idea of any animated movies That are coming out now I'll talk like whatever they want I mean you know anyway just if you have anything Just DM me I'll keep an eye out I'm waiting for Hotel Transylvania 5 Ooh Yeah How much does that bring you bro I got a waiting pool A blow pool Waiting for a pool no i think by five i should get a pool uh it was listen it's very it's a very fair paycheck uh fair i mean not it's not fair to the real world but it's great and then it usually goes up increments i'm not as crucial as you would be an ice age but it's really fun to be a part of it also in the way that when i see kids it's a good relatable thing because they see them but dude i I get the, I get the, for me, it's a weird experience when I meet the kids because parents come up to me and they go, Oh, Hey, uh, I'm a huge fan of my son.

16:09Can I introduce you to my son? I go, yo, it's not going to go really well. It'll ruin and scare them almost. And that voice is, and they really relate. And then the parents come up and I go to the kids and I go, hi, how's it going? And the kids are like horrified. Oh, I know. I don't know. Song and dance explaining to the child to the not traumatized for the, Yeah, they don't get it and they don't love it. It's better on the phone. They don't love it. It's fascinating. And I can understand it. I mean, I'm not, I wouldn't force myself, you know, on these poor kids. I'm like, please don't do this to them.

16:46Dana Carvey:Does Ice Age have a ride? Are you a ride in a theme park? Are you a ride yet? I know, I know, Bruno, there's a ride. Because that's Disney. You know what I mean? Disney, yeah. Yeah, Bruno Encanto is Disney. Sorry, that's another animated movie. Oh, Encanto, Encanto. Yeah, you don't talk about Bruno. The biggest hit song that Disney has ever had. Yeah, Dana. Oh, yeah. Oh, bruh-bruh. Thank you, John, for explaining it. I don't know about Bruno. No, no. Let me see. I have more questions for this. Most talkative. I love that in school. Yeah, Chatterbox, high school. Chatterbox is two? And I think I was because I was in a bad sort of area where I think I read you felt like you might get beat up when you were growing up.

17:38And I was in the same. If that's true, I was in an area that was and I was a little pipsqueak, which you would never believe. But and I wasn't as tough as I am now with these quads and how I work out all the time. So I would just go to school and go, I'm going to get beat up today or pushed into a wall. and so I would try to joke my way out of it and I and also my dad had taken off and I think when I look back I'm trying to joke around and make friends because sort of to get some happy stuff going just to talk and talk and have fun oh my god that's kind of like me it was like my house was really difficult my house situation was there was a lot of aggression and violence my dad basically would edit out the humor out of the home movies.

18:28It was like there was a fun free zone in my house. So I was always trying to bring humor and light and life to every situation. Plus, my neighbor was really tough. So I was always fighting all the time. But let me correct, not fighting. I was getting beat up. Thank you. I fought a few times, but not a lot. But I did have a good right punch and I could knock people out. but I got beat up a lot. Yeah. It was a lot of school. I got people took my lunch money. They would pick on my brother. So I'd have to try to defend my brother too. So yeah, there was a lot of fighting going on at home and in the streets, which prepared me for Hollywood.

19:04Hollywood ain't got shit. They can't take me down. I mean, yeah, I'm invincible now. You try to keep it light at school, try to keep things fun because you want to be like valuable as funny. So you don't get beat up all the time. So you're like, we like this guy. He's kind of a clown yeah that was my angle like just leave me alone i'll joke around with everyone i'll stay out of your way but i didn't back down though that was my problem i i didn't have that thing that i could back down if people cornered me i wanted yeah i don't know i needed to i guess i had a lot of aggression and anger so i needed to get it out i do have that thing so i do back down easily uh

19:42Dana Carvey:dana i we all have similar childhoods it was uh not not fun at home there was a monster in the neighborhood in the neighborhood there was a monster a scary monster and then and the monster was my dad how is he a monster um you know if you he would if you did something he didn't like there were five kids you know he'd gather everyone around you'd have to go get his belt and then he would snap it you know snap that belt and then you'd have to grab your ankles and then he would ask your siblings how many lashes and then it just wail on you yeah but i learned to be like a mouse i learned to be you know not seen or heard because of the threat of violence so anyway i i kind of concur with you i'm only fascinated that you had a right hand that could knock people out i just need to know how old were you like fifth grade knocking people out or no no i i was 13 uh 14 yeah no no no no i mean the fights that i had before were like stupid little kid fights you know you just wail on each other you know like that kind of right right sure no but then by the time i got 13 you know i hung out with some tough kids who would protect me because i make them laugh so i hang out with them and i do their homework too because i was a ghetto nerd so they would protect me but then i got you know i got i think i think i had so much rage and fear when kids some kids would corner me and try to beat me up i would talk a lot and i'll go hey dude i'm sorry i'd look down and i'd be like i'm so sorry i didn't and then i'd sucker punch him and knock him out with one punch shit i i like that that's you know i was kind of a puss so i didn't get that and i just had the rage build up and it just stayed so that's why My neck hurts.

21:33Other than that, wait, I want to hear a little bit about Legas on What Is America, because I also want to ask about some other movies, too. But can you tell us a little bit about that right now? Yeah. You know, our first season was at MSNBC, number one original show for the last three years. So we got a season two out of it. And basically, I go around the country looking for Latin excellence, Latin brilliance, Latin genius, Latin ingenuity. And I celebrate it. You know, and I go to six different cities every year. and uh you know last season i went to la new york miami chicago the big latin places right and then this time i went to raleigh people down there and noli new orleans nola uh san antonio obviously a big latin population there and uh phoenix and denver and philadelphia shit yeah i'm from arizona so when you go to somewhere like that do you have like a crew you kind of scout out or do you kind of walk out in the world and just start talking to people or How does it work?

22:30Oh, no, no. It's very heavily planned. Okay. You know, I have a great team. My director, Bende Jesus, my showrunner, Caro Saavedra, and, you know, and then producers for each segment. And, you know, we find the best people. We walk and we do all these, you know, like an Anthony Bourdain, but of Latino culture.

22:53Dana Carvey:Oh, okay. What have you, doing this show, has there been surprises to you? or experiences of learning or is it you're just showcasing people from a lot of learning is happening for me yeah I mean when we were in Philadelphia I learned that you know you know it's a big center of American the colonies in the nation and I learned that 10 ,000 unknown Latino patriots fought in the American Revolution and then I went home when I got that news and I I started reading it and researching, and I found out that there were 80 ,000 troops. And then I realized we were one in eight. We were one in eight. And then Juan de Miralles funded George Washington.

23:38They had a bromance, and he gave them$2 million from Cuba, Mexico, and Spain. General Bernardo Galvez got an army of 3 ,000 Puerto Ricans, Cubans, Mexicans, Native Americans, and freed slaves. And they kicked the British all out of the South so they couldn't ambush the New England Patriots. the revolutionaries, not the football team. Not the team? Okay.

23:59Dana Carvey:That's interesting. Yeah, well, very interesting. Is the Alamo a sore point for people from Latin America? Because it's kind of like John Wayne did the movie and remember the Alamo, but from the other side of the fence, is it? Yeah, I mean, being a Latin person and the Alamo, it is kind of because, you know, all these Latin people, it was, first of all, it was Mexico and Latin for like ever. And then we let all these white people come in thinking that, you know, maybe we could, the people in Texas could become a country on their own. And they were banned. And so they worked with the Texans, the whatever, the white people that started coming in there.

24:40And they freed themselves from Mexico. But then the Texans turned on them and took their, you know, their land, their political power, and then started massacring and lynching all the Latin people there.

24:53Dana Carvey:so the john wayne movie wasn't a fan favorite of yours or you know i didn't know but i was rooting against myself you like to yeah well until you know something it's hard to uh john i bet you dana i bet you do the killer is yeah dana where's your what come on hey all right here's my john wayne yeah john wayne uh and walter brennan the The thing I do like about John Wayne is not that he had no fear. He was furious at the idea that anyone else would have any fear. So, you know, well, let's attack him, Pappy. No, Duke, there's 10 ,000 of them and 40 of us, Duke. We're going to die. I said attack, Pappy.

25:41Dana Carvey:You'll attack when I tell you. Don't make me do what I did last time. What was that? What did he do? That's how he ends it. He never says. Everyone goes, oh, fuck. I don't want to. Let me do one more. And then I want to ask you about your very first stand up bit, because this is one of my earliest stand up bits. I would say Lucio Ball in 1952. Oh, Ricky. Lucio Ball today. Well, oh, wait, no. Sorry. Sorry. It goes like this. It goes John Wayne, 1952. Well, let's go over the ridge. John Wayne today. Well, let's go over the ridge Lucio Ball 52 Let's go, come on Ricky Lucio Ball today Well, let's go Ricky I didn't do it very well, but it killed It sounds like there's something there And we're still going to workshop it It always killed So your first stand-up bit that really worked for you You have five seconds Oh fuck You have 25 seconds You know, I was part of First Amendment comedy troupe where Bruce Willis used to come in New York City and Robin Williams come down, rest in peace.

26:54And I was part of the C Company. And the great thing about it is there was a lot of cute women. And that was comedy was wonderful back then for me. And yeah. When was it Mambo Mount? That wasn't your first one, was it? That was my first one man show in 1990. okay because i remember hearing about that was at hbo yeah then it went to hbo but i was doing it in the performance art spaces downtown and then i did it at the american place theater where sam shepherd arthur miller al pacino george plinth i don't know if y 'all remember who he was john f k jr rest in peace all came down and were in my tiny tiny theater bro i had 70 fold-up seats because they would lift my little tiny platform out of the way for the real show.

27:49I wasn't even a real show. I was like a sideline. So they all came down and watched you do that. How cool. And so HBO hears about this. You get some buzz and that's how they come in. And they, yeah, yeah. Like they hear about a standup. They hear about something and they want to see what's going on. So they throw it on HBO and that must have blown you up a little bit, right? What happened then after that was I wasn't in tiny spaces anymore. Now I was in big ass theaters traveling around the country. And especially because Latin people now found me because they were getting the bootleg HBO. They couldn't afford the regular HBO.

28:21Yeah. I know. I know. Because everybody told me I got the bootleg. And I was like, oh, great. I didn't get it. But yeah, then all of a sudden we met each other and it was beautiful, man. It was like religion. I mean, I think my audiences have always kind of kept me going against all odds. You know, because, you know, we land people at 20 percent of the U.S. population, but less than 3 percent of the leads in Hollywood, less than zero percent of the executives are stories being told. It's just it's so crazy, you know, but that's.

28:58Dana Carvey:Twenty seven percent of the population. Oh, really? You'd be a good executive, actually. Dana. Yes. Would you be Lucille Ball as an executive or John? Well, John Lucuziano. Well, he does the one man shows. That's him all the time, Pappy. Is he good, Duke? He gets Emmy nominations and all kinds of stuff. Well, I don't know, Pappy. Don't make me do what I did last time. Sorry. What did he do last time? Yeah, what the fuck, John? you're the only one who likes my John Wayne that's what I'll take away I like the Lucio ball part better I don't know I'm available for parties or whatever Lucy don't do that to me you got a lot of stuff let me ask you a question about Desi Arnaz Jr this is supposedly a thing I heard from a crew guy that he liked the ladies and Lucy and the marriage and the whole thing and she's wandering around backstage in the studio go, Ricky, Ricky.

30:06Dana Carvey:She comes along, sees him up in the slats, up in the whatever, and a woman is performing oral sex on him. He sees Lucy and goes, get out of here, man. What are you doing? What are you doing? He's pretending he's being attacked by the woman. Get away from me. What are you doing? What are you doing? That's what I heard from a guy on the crew. Could that be true? Have you heard the one about Stallone that he left the speaker on in the trailer? and and uh oh he was miked and he was like and he was like yeah yeah and he was going cup the balls work the shaft cup the ball that's right out of my playbook you know you know what i'm talking about yeah it's a good technique i mean uh it's functional people don't know outside of hollywood you have a mic on a lavalier mic and you don't turn it off sometimes yeah and a lot of a lot of bad stuff can happen with that but i've not always say they can't they can't hear you when you walk away from the set i go that's the biggest lie i would just listen to people that would be so fun they always go once you get to this i go i'm having a meeting i don't want to take all this off can you just turn it off they go sure yeah that happened with with uh betty davis the director i can't remember what his name is right now worked really hard to get her into uh i think was it jezebel one of those big southern ones.

31:29Then she left her mic on it. She was telling the producers to fire him that she couldn't stand the director. Oh, my God. That's what happened. Alec Baldwin and Kim Basner were either fighting or getting it on or something in a car, like between takes.