RE-RELEASE - Kyle Dunnigan

6:09Dana Carvey:I had -

6:10David Spade:Oh, go ahead and tell the story because why not? This is a great one. Do you do Tony Robbins? No, I don't. But I tried to get one for the thing. But I was excited because I like Tony Robbins. I read like three books in my life. Tony Robbins. Yeah, me too. So I was excited. I was nervous because they were paying me more money than I've ever been paid for anything in my life.

6:30Kyle Dunnigan:$750.

6:31David Spade:No, higher. I turned them down. No, I know. You got to say what it is, but it was more than$1 ,000. Tony does not. Tony. It was$24 ,000. It was more than$1 ,000. But what do you net?

6:42Dana Carvey:It was$25 ,000. It was great. Yeah. That's wonderful.

6:46David Spade:Well, yeah, so I was very excited. That's an adorable number.

6:49Dana Carvey:I know to you guys, that's so no money. No, we don't get it. He's his money bags here. Think about where you are and think of who owns this place. No, I know. Cooling this house is$25 ,000. All right, Tony Robbins tried to beat you up. Got you in a headlock.

7:02David Spade:We'll let you get through this story. Hopefully, we probably won't. I was nervous, and I thought, hey, Tony would say, take care of yourself, little buddy. People don't know Tony. He's like nine feet tall. He has actually a tumor on his pituitary gland, and it's pumping out growth hormones. That's why he's so big. He's younger.

7:18Dana Carvey:He's grown a foot and a half in the last 18 months. Yeah.

7:21David Spade:He's been... When he was a kid, they asked if he wanted to take it out, and he was like, no, I want to be enormous. He could have taken it out, and he didn't. Is that true? That's a true story. Oh, my God. He is a huge man.

7:33Kyle Dunnigan:I want to be enormous.

7:33David Spade:It worked. It did, yeah. It worked. He really stands out.

7:37Kyle Dunnigan:Yeah.

7:38David Spade:I don't know if you see the documentary, but he puts his hand on someone's head. It's like a giant catcher's mitt just envelops the whole guy's head. All right, I'm getting to the... Because you're a bunch of fucking losers. I don't care. I like the whole story. Hey, you little piece of shit. Yeah, he's a therapist that swears. Yeah, he yells. He's scary. Go ahead. I'm getting comfortable. So I was like, I'm going to go take care of myself and get a massage. I never do that. So I went to this place, and I don't want a handjob. I know about the little handjob thing. You're not one of those happy ending...

8:05Dana Carvey:Yeah. Yeah, David's never heard of those. No.

8:08David Spade:Yeah. But the whole point of going there is to feel better about myself, you know? I don't want to walk. I don't want to have a handjob. So I'm like, how do I look like I don't want a handjob? So I take off my baseball hat because guys in baseball hats look like they want handjobs. Very suspicious. You know what I mean? So you take off the cap? Yeah. I'm not saying David wants a handjob. No, check. I like it. He looks like he wants a handjob. So I take that off and I kind of go in jolly, you know?

8:32Dana Carvey:Yeah.

8:32David Spade:Instead of like serious looking around.

8:36Dana Carvey:Slinking in. Embarrassed already. Shame.

8:39David Spade:And she gives me a good back massage. She flips me over. She starts doing a little tickly on the stomach. I'm like, oh, this is like going down a hand job lane. And so out of nowhere, she taps my penis. And she goes, you hungry? And I was like, oh, no, I just ate. The better question is, is she hungry? She seemed hungry. Okay, got it. I didn't ask her, but. This is important for our listeners. She looked like famished. Yeah. So I said no.

9:08Dana Carvey:Someone's the meal and someone's the consumer of the meal. Yes, yes.

9:11David Spade:She was drooling. Then she tapped my penis again harder, like four more times. She was like, no, you hungry? Am I breaking your mic? And I go, oh, no, thank you, thank you. And she goes, oh, girlfriend? And I go, no. And she goes, wife? And I go, no. I know where this one's heading to. Yeah. And she goes, oh, that's it? She thinks you're on the other team. Yeah. So I walked out there feeling great. I go to the Tony Robbins thing. And beforehand, they did a Zoom call with me, you know, where they go, this is what Tony wants. And he wants me to do Biden on a big screen. No one sees me. They just see Biden.

9:48David Spade:But he's going to introduce me as the president of the United States is here. And I was a little worried because that could happen. He could Zoom in the president. He's met all the presidents. So I said to them, I'm a little worried they're going to be disappointed when they see me. And they were just like, this is what Tony wants. This is a cult. You don't tell us. This is what we do.

10:06Dana Carvey:Yeah. I did the same kind of gig. I want to hear about this. I want to hear yours, though.

10:10David Spade:Because I'm sure yours is better than mine.

10:12Dana Carvey:No, everything is ringing true to me. Okay. But I love Tony Robbins.

10:15David Spade:Tell when they play, they play like a videotape before. Yes. So, well, it was actually two things. A montage, right? Yeah. I'm making this story way too long. No.

10:25Dana Carvey:Not on fly, right? We go for over here.

10:29David Spade:I Googled Tony Robbins' birthday on YouTube. I don't think I told you this. And his last birthday was this big extravaganza with all these stars. Just like, Tony, you're the best. He's bawling, crying. His wife's like, I love you, honey. It was like at 60 or something like that, you know? So I felt even more pressure that this is the next birthday. So I get there and he's like, thanks for doing this, you little hunk of crap. and he whacks me on the back. And everybody's super jazzed up, but they've been up since like five in the morning, you know, swimming with sharks.

11:05Kyle Dunnigan:This is a lot of corporate gigs where they beat them to death and they go, here's your entertainment. They're like, yeah. It's like, go, we can win.

11:13David Spade:They have dancers come out. You probably saw this. After every speaker, they could go like, pop, pop, pop, pop. Mine was on Zoom.

11:18Dana Carvey:Mine was on Zoom.

11:19David Spade:Oh, see, that was smart. Well. I was there. I flew down to West Palm Beach. He wanted me to fall there. Undisclosed location. So anyway, so what happens? Yeah, get to the end of the story. No, you know, I could do Tony Robbins for the first half hour.

11:34Dana Carvey:And then we'll do McCartney for the second half hour.

11:36David Spade:He's at a trampoline. And I jumped on that beforehand trying to get pumped up. And so the guy before me was the Secretary of Defense, former Secretary of Defense, Larry Sumners. And he just talked like this. He went over an hour and a half. An economist, yeah. It's like midnight now. And Tony goes, are you ready for the surprise of your life? And they're like, yeah. And they're like, have I ever disappointed you? They're like, no, you never disappointed us. And then he goes. It's all true. And then someone goes like, blah, blah. There's a pause. He'd forgot to play the package they made, this minute package video of him with presidents.

12:15David Spade:Oh, OK. So now that plays, they're like, OK. No, he goes, yeah, the president of the United States, they go nuts. Then they play the package. Then he reintroduces me because he introduced me before he did it wrong. But now it really feels like for sure the president. Because in the video they said he's shaking hands with Obama.

12:32Kyle Dunnigan:Yeah. So they really think Biden's coming up. Oh, they 100%.

12:35David Spade:Oh, and there's no way he would fuck us over and have some asshole playing Biden. Exactly. So I'm sitting backstage like, oh, no. It's the nightmare I imagine. So then I pop up on the screen and you hear this audible, uh, from the audience. and I'm like, hey, it's Tony Bologna's birthday. That pretty good guy. Come on, man, it's a good guy. Corn pop. And I'm dying. Corn pop. Just death, nothing. Really? God, that's so unusual. I'm getting nothing from them. Because they're angry. Yeah, and I think they don't even know if it's a joke and they're just staring. And in my head, I'm going, this is the funniest thing and I've got another 25 minutes.

13:11David Spade:You know when you're done with your funniest bit? You're like, this is just going to get worse.

13:16Dana Carvey:And are you in a suit and tie just at a regular mile? That's a whole other thing. I went shopping.

13:20David Spade:You know, you're nervous. You shop for a new outfit. Oh, before or after the masseuse. I had to go after. You know what I mean? So I bought these new shoes. They were both left feet, so I couldn't even use it. I had dirty shoes. What?

13:34Dana Carvey:Who does that?

13:36David Spade:I'm making this story. I'm telling you 10%. This is going to be a bonus podcast, probably. Yeah. If you want, yeah, go to the Patreon. I think it's his own podcast.

13:46Kyle Dunnigan:Yeah.

13:47David Spade:And then I got a shirt. so I looked it was a black button and I looked like a magician yeah and I made a joke about that

13:53Dana Carvey:you have clown shoes on and a misfit I didn't

13:57David Spade:I wore my dirty shoes and because I couldn't fit into those two left feet they go I like when the magician made all the laughter disappear

14:08yeah

14:10David Spade:it's weird because the screen goes up and now I have to introduce myself and here's a surprise for Tony Kyle this is very normal They're like, this guy's still going? Yeah, yeah. Well, I walk out and they jump up and they're like, yay. Because they're all taught to just give you the energy. And then back to like, we hate you. Sit back down.

14:30Dana Carvey:This is very normal for corporate. Back to we hate you. Yeah.

14:33David Spade:And I go, I said something about like, I know it looks like I'm about to do magic. I promise I'm not. And they're like, we thought this would be magic. What is the entertainment? They don't get any sarcasm or irony.

14:44Dana Carvey:No.

14:44David Spade:it's almost like the opposite because it's all about positivity and then I you know stand up still cutting and I'm halfway through jokes going don't tell the rest of this joke I told a joke I go I dated this girl she was too young she was 19 years younger don't judge I was in college that's when you experiment and they go oh wait that means she was like three oh my god yeah that's a tough opener no I didn't know

15:10Kyle Dunnigan:you just go into Bill Maher or something right

15:13Dana Carvey:What's your fail safe? Like Def Con 5, what bit is just never bombed?

15:19David Spade:You ever get that situation where you jump to maybe this will work now? Yes, to your sure fires. Yeah, but nothing's working. In your head, you have nothing. Yeah.

15:27Kyle Dunnigan:But you're skipping chunks, and then you're like, I want to have enough now. Yeah.

15:31David Spade:And you're speeding through. Yeah, done it. Half this, and then the clock's like going backwards. And I'm like on the piano at one point. And then people, I have like pictures. I don't know if you have a website. if I could put up. Anyway. We have nothing. It doesn't matter. We don't run good at social media. We barely have audio. Yeah. Oh, and then. I just got Wi-Fi. I get off and I was supposed to sing Happy Birthday to Tony as Caitlyn Jenner, right? So there's a wig. I'm back on the, where the laptop is where I'm projected like a face swap. Okay. And I see the wig there. Go for the wig. No.

16:09David Spade:No? I say, I can't. I need to walk out of here with something. I can't walk out of here with a woman's wig on. So I leave it there. And not crush.

16:16Dana Carvey:Yeah.

16:16David Spade:Yeah. And I just go sincere. I'm like, hey, guys, it's Tony's birthday. How about a happy birthday? I was supposed to be like, happy birthday to Tony, baby. Yeah. And do some, man, he's got a big old cock.

16:28Kyle Dunnigan:Yeah.

16:28David Spade:But I bailed on that. And I just did a sincere happy birthday. And they just turned to their leader.

16:32Kyle Dunnigan:And they're like, happy birthday.

16:34David Spade:And I use that to sneak out. And I'm grabbing my stuff. And so he thought I was offstage. But I was under the desk. and he goes, did you guys have a day you'll never forget? And they were like, yeah. And then he goes, this is a night I'd like to forget.

16:49Kyle Dunnigan:No.

16:49David Spade:He was talking about me. Way. Have you ever heard Tony Robbins say negative things in your life on anyone? No. He said about me.

16:56Dana Carvey:That's weird.

16:57David Spade:It was rough. That's weird. That is weird. We'll be right back.

17:01Dana Carvey:Yeah, I was just on a Zoom real quickly and he was just super enthusiastic and there were just all these flashing pictures of people all over the world. And he would go, I would do a bit. He didn't like Fauci, so I was like, you don't need a vaccine. It'll solve everything. All that stuff. And he goes, give it up for Dana Carvey. So I'm just in my little room. My wife's cooking dinner downstairs, and he's going like this. And it went on for two minutes. So I started dancing in my room, just for one landed joke. It was during the pandemic, obviously. How much time did you have to do? I think it was supposed to be 45.

17:36Dana Carvey:I think it ended up being 35 and they were fine with it. David, do you have a Tony Robbins gig story? You know, I did get a call about a Tony Robbins gig.

17:45Kyle Dunnigan:You what? I got a call about one recently. Are you being serious? I swear to God, yeah.

17:50Dana Carvey:Because I turned them down.

17:50Kyle Dunnigan:I think what happens is they do these gigs. Yeah.

17:53Dana Carvey:I was too busy.

17:54Kyle Dunnigan:Go ahead, David. You have to throw that. Well, Dana, you already did it, though.

17:58David Spade:You were number two.

17:59Kyle Dunnigan:No, but then they wanted me back

18:01Dana Carvey:in person. Oh, yeah, yeah. And I was really, really busy with something and they only told me five days before So I said, you know.

18:08David Spade:There was nothing that was going to stop me to get$25 ,000. It could have been for two ways.

18:13Dana Carvey:I would like that money now that my 401k is 70 % down. Because of? I think I know. Because of the bad gas, the bad gas, the bad gas, the bad gas, the bad gas, the caravan. Because of. DocuSign. Or no. DocuSign, yes. The stock market's been bad. It went down over 100%. I actually owe money. It's negative 28%. No, it'll be fine. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I'm fine. David?

18:38Kyle Dunnigan:You guys are fine. I like when you both do Biden. It's funny talking to each other.

18:41Dana Carvey:Well, I just end with Pirates of the Caribbean. I love yours, your stuff. It's good.

18:46David Spade:We have like different Bidens.

18:48Dana Carvey:Yeah. The latest one, do you do the whisper yell? Because that's what happened after Afghanistan.

18:55David Spade:Yeah, I'd be like, come on, man. This guy gets this guy, a pirate poontang. Not poontang. The guy. The bad dude. And then it's like, yeah, it's like a little or like a mumble. He does.

19:06Dana Carvey:My dad used to do this where he'd patronize Whisper, like, I know better than you do.

19:12David Spade:Oh, yeah.

19:13Dana Carvey:Because I know a lot better, and I know how to do it. You know, your Biden's amazing. Yeah, he does. Come on.

19:18David Spade:Yeah, he does that.

19:18Dana Carvey:And you do everything. I mean, you just went at him early, because now the New York Times is attacking Biden, saying he makes up stories and bumbling. Back in those days, it was a hot oven, but your thing was always just edgy and funny.

19:31Kyle Dunnigan:Kyle on YouTube and Instagram is always something that's ahead of the game.

19:35Dana Carvey:Go anywhere you felt like going.

19:36Kyle Dunnigan:Even when you do Caitlyn Jenner, you get, you always wonder, are these Kardashians even, are they even aware? I had, I never know.

19:44David Spade:I found a video that they made, because I did a video where they were like, we're mad at you. The whole thing was just like, we're mad at you. We're all mad at you. And then Khloe did a video going, we're mad at you. Oh, really? They did it. They're looking at it. So they saw that one. I don't know if they saw the other ones, though. I think maybe just that one.

20:03Dana Carvey:Should we talk about one that you thought might tweak them? Because you're always going for the laugh. You don't seem like you're waving any political party or any point of view. Definitely, yeah. Other than what's funny.

20:13David Spade:Yeah, that's all I'm trying to do. You do Biden, Fresh Prince of D.C., right? I'm trying to finish one up now. They take forever. And I go dark. So with making money on the internet, you've got to keep cranking stuff out. You know, sketch, it's really hard to crank out. I mean, SNL's got 30 writers or something. Oh, no.

20:32Dana Carvey:One-man band? what you're doing I don't know when you're doing in the house

20:35Kyle Dunnigan:and you got green screens and face swap and all these computer things and you have graphics and then I edit

20:40David Spade:and then it's like like I'll be like oh I need tape to tape down this wig so then I go to the store and I gotta get the tape for the wig and that's a half hour and I'm like oh wait I need a tie then I go to like the Goodwill and I get a tie and then I'll shoot for an hour and I'm like oh my ear was sticking out I gotta reshoot that for an hour some days do you have anyone helping you? so much work

20:59Dana Carvey:I know some people could help you I need to find

21:02David Spade:I need to find a way to get money that I could pay people because that would be great. Well, you're okay.

21:08Dana Carvey:It's Kyle Dunnigan's YouTube channel.

21:11Kyle Dunnigan:We're listeners. Go check it out. There's no more talent. It's tougher to make. There's just some ways it's hard to make money no matter how good you are. It's just hard to get on YouTube and that shit.

21:22David Spade:It's hard to crank out sketch. SNL's got probably two sketches a week that are good. Well, they write about 50, 55 in 24 hours. And two are good, and they take two weeks off every two weeks. It's just like, it's like bass player, you know. Most of you strike out.

21:38Dana Carvey:Sometimes three, Kyle. Oh, is it three? No, it was Lauren visited the podcast.

21:42Kyle Dunnigan:We would do two, and then a week off, and then three, and then a week off. Then around Christmas, two weeks off.

21:49Dana Carvey:But you're right, huge staff churning stuff out, and it's a numbers game.

21:53David Spade:Yeah, so I'll like do a few in a row, and I'll watch it grow, and then I'll stop. I'll need to like take a break for like a month or a couple weeks, and it'll just, I'll drop 40 % on my next video. So it's like, that's, I'm trying to figure out how to do the business side. So now this next Fresh Pressing is more like a short film. I'm going to release it like, and maybe have people pay like two bucks for it or something.

22:15Dana Carvey:So it's a parody of The Will Smith Show. Yeah. He's done a bunch of those. I know, I've seen them just for the audience. He's kind of rapping as Biden and running around and then insanity ensues. Yeah, and there's like sitcom laughs around it. The Will Smith Show. Here's a hot tip for 2026. filing your taxes with TurboTax. That's right. Instead of juggling forms and receipts while you track down a tax appointment, you can hand everything off to your dedicated TurboTax full-service expert. They'll take it from there to handle your taxes for you entirely. You simply upload your tax documents and your expert works through your return with one goal, getting you the best possible tax outcome.

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23:58Dana Carvey:campus files available now wherever you get your podcasts david i just want to say this to you a good wardrobe isn't about quantity it's about quality and guess what quince nails that quince they're lightweight cashmere sweaters mongolian cashmere polos linen bottoms and 100 pima cotton tees are the versatile pieces i actually wear year after year oh yeah hey quince you know they cut

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25:31Kyle Dunnigan:Well, also, people that are listening should know Kyle is a comedian. Been doing it forever. He up for five Emmys, wrote for the was it Inside Amy Schumer?

25:41Dana Carvey:And won an Emmy for Girl, You Don't Need Makeup, which I listened to today.

25:47Kyle Dunnigan:What was that? Girl, You Don't Need Makeup.

25:49David Spade:Was it on Amy? When you wake up. Yeah, it was on the Schumer show. My mom has that. I brought her the Emmys. She's very excited. Okay. We'll come back to the Schumer show. Sarah Silverman, did you write for that show? I did. Actually, that was a show I was writing, and then I had, I was like, I have to get out of here. It was a great job, but I just felt like I was writing too much for other people, and I wanted to perform in there. So I started making, I actually, during that writing thing, I figured out how to do the face swaps. So it was a FaceTime call so they could talk to each other. And that was like a big, I was doing imitations of the writers in the room and they liked it.

26:28David Spade:Then I started doing it online. That's kind of what blew that up. What year was that? How long have you been doing this? 2016 or 16, 17.

26:34Dana Carvey:And so, okay.

26:35Kyle Dunnigan:Well, early on, tell us when you, you probably were into SNL because we all were.

26:43David Spade:Yeah.

26:43Kyle Dunnigan:And, but you did, did you finally get an audition? Was it one or was it you were trying to get an audition? Like everyone?

26:51David Spade:Yeah, I didn't know what to do. Yeah. Big fan of SNL. Dana's been a huge influence. We talked about that. We don't have to talk about that. Yeah.

27:00Dana Carvey:Well, maybe we can talk about it just a little bit. We can talk a little bit. I don't know.

27:03David Spade:Three sentences. I'll comment David though because I was an extra on SNL. When I was there?

27:09Kyle Dunnigan:This is the worst story.

27:10David Spade:No, you had left like the year before. And being, let me just go back, but David - Oh, we're going to dog ear that one, yeah. Yeah, David - Fucked you over. You could see in the monitors what was going on in rehearsal and you could hear it. And I was like, oh, David's the funniest one. Because he was riffing. Yeah, I don't remember what you were doing.

27:31Dana Carvey:And then when an air show came, he would freeze up a little bit.

27:38Dana Carvey:He was funny. David was always the funniest one.

27:42Kyle Dunnigan:So funny.

27:42David Spade:But very, very low-fi. Rehearsal show you, yeah.

27:45Kyle Dunnigan:I mean, rehearsal, I didn't know back then, they were probably taping him, but you're just bullshitting with your friends saying, by the way, anything, forgetting you're on camera. But when Kyle was there, we were doing, it happened to be one of my favorite ones ever, which was the Gap Girls. Lay off him starving. Lay off him starving. And Kyle, not only was he there, he was an extra. Ooh. And they put him in the Gap Girl sketch. And they put him in a primo spot behind us. I was really excited about that.

28:18Dana Carvey:So you were just on camera with no lines throughout the sketch?

28:20David Spade:Yeah, and I'm just right next to Chris Farley. I'm like, this is probably my big break. I'm not sure. That's a sad mistake. So we're about to go out. And David comes over. He's like, yeah, this is my friend, whoever wants this.

28:33Kyle Dunnigan:My buddy was visiting Arizona, and I'd never done this ever. You guys are flip-flopping. And I fucking go, can he be in this? They go, yeah. And I go, Rick, why don't you sit here? And they pulled Kyle out.

28:43David Spade:Yeah, well, they flipped me. So I go, we'll get you the back of your head, Kyle, and my friend will get the – And then he became famous off that. He got a deal off that extra work.

28:53Dana Carvey:Can I ask a question about this? So sickening. Just for a second, because I don't know that part of you. When did you start being a comedian? Trying to be professional. Was your first stand-up at 18? Or were you doing little shows for your parents when you were 10? We have all different. When I was younger, I didn't.

29:13David Spade:I remember being laughed at, but not like me trying to be funny, but humiliating things.

29:18Dana Carvey:Just in school?

29:19David Spade:Yeah. Yeah. Even my very first memory was my whole family laughing. I mean, my grandmother was like, what's this, Nana? It was a placemat. We got like a choo-choo place. And she goes, oh, you eat on that. And my little brain was like, eat on it. Didn't make sense, but eat it made sense. I could see that. I think I'd skip that little word. So I started eating it. And I came in, I was trying to eat that. And my first memory is everyone like, ha, ha, ha. And then I got to school. What an idiot. Yeah. And people would laugh at me, but I wasn't trying to be funny. I was little. I think we were like three little guys, right?

29:53David Spade:Three of us were like little guys.

29:54Dana Carvey:What was your height and weight when you entered high school?

29:58David Spade:I know, all I know is the tiniest, except for my friend, Michael was like a half inch. And I love, cause when they'd line you up, it was like Michael year on the end. I would, but I was always number two, but I remember they had superlatives where they go, you know, best looking, most likely succeed. And the popular girls come up to me and they never talked to me. And they were like, we decided you're the funniest.

30:17Kyle Dunnigan:Whoa. Okay.

30:19David Spade:It was like eighth grade. It was like 12 years old. So before school, you know, I say to that, I go,

30:25Kyle Dunnigan:you hungry? And they go, and I go you go it's early I'm gonna ask you again

30:30David Spade:but I didn't really know or think I was funny and then the lobby of the before you go to school there's like a lobby and everyone hangs out oh it's terrifying

30:39Dana Carvey:yeah junior high

30:39David Spade:right right and this big the big bully Scott Chapman comes up to me pushes me and he goes you're not funny whoa because word got out that I was gonna be the funniest and he wanted to be the funny guy and I was like yeah okay I don't think you're right

30:50Dana Carvey:beat the funny out of you yeah and he goes

30:53David Spade:I'm funnier than you now everyone starts gathering around us like there's gonna be some funny fight yeah yeah it's eight miles so what does he say i backed it i was like you are like this is hilarious what you're doing so then i got voted class clown i got upset about it because um clown it kind of isn't the same it's not good especially when you're 12 and you want to be liked by girls and it was like the popular guys i was like oh they look at me like i'm this like clown so i have a my friend was really sweet and he was intending to do something nice, but he went to the principal or whatever and was like, Kyle's upset, the clown, called the clown.

31:31David Spade:So they changed it to best person. They changed it to best personality.

31:35Kyle Dunnigan:Really? Don't shrink down. Don't he's shrinking down in his chair. They changed it.

31:42Dana Carvey:Did your gift for mimicry emerge at that time? Could you do the PE coach or were you doing?

31:48David Spade:Yeah, that actually got me attention from girls. I did I did Michael Jackson this girl I really liked do Michael Jackson so I would just dance like a monkey and one time she crossed it off her shoe Michael Jackson and I got hurt personally like we broke up but did you do the voice

32:07Dana Carvey:or just do a little dance

32:08David Spade:I do the voice and the dance I remember this is a hacky impression now but I saw one of my first impressions I saw Christopher Walken at our local tiny grocery store Weston Connecticut tiny little thing I'd never seen a famous person before so I was following him around like a creep you know the thing when you go to a grocery store and you're like oh I just want to get some batteries but then you start going oh I need that so he had this whole pile of stuff and right before he got to the front he just like jang-ed it all over the floor and he goes oh no my cottage cheese and the lady was like it's fine and he's like no no you get quiet and be like I'm sorry he got really loud and that like bug got in my hand.

32:49David Spade:I was like, I think one of the first impressions I did, but I did impressions, but then I started doing standup when I got out, uh, to try to make money. Cause there just was no money in sketch out of, out of the world of school, out of college and stuff. Yeah. Okay. So early twenties, you start doing standup. Yeah. And my, you know, managers were like, don't do impressions and guitar. So everything that I do well, they, I didn't do for 20 years until I found Facebook.

33:13Dana Carvey:They told me not to do that either. Yeah. Don't do impressions. Don't, Don't do the church, Lee. What bad advice that we got. Yeah.

33:21Kyle Dunnigan:Later you go, what the fuck do you know?

33:23Dana Carvey:So then what was your, like those years you got on shows pretty quickly? Like Cedric the Entertainer, you were a sketch player.

33:30David Spade:Yeah. That was, I thought that was like a big break because I was kind of a hit sketch show. And I joined mid-season because like we need a white guy to pick on. And before we would do the shows like a funny little thing. they would do a prayer circle. And Cedric is very religious. And he's holding hands with two Jewish producers. And we're just sitting around. I would just stare at the Jewish producers because they'd have to be there like, pray, please, Jesus, help these setups land our punchlines. And we'd be all praying for Jesus. And there was really only a couple of people who believed in Jesus.

34:07David Spade:But that was before we went out. Prayer circles are awkward. I'm not religious, no. Okay.

34:11Dana Carvey:Yeah. No.

34:12David Spade:Do you have any?

34:14Dana Carvey:affiliation with a political party? No.

34:16Kyle Dunnigan:How do you spell your last name, Mr. Dunnigan? Wait, I want to get to some impressions too, but also, oh wait, when did you do cruise ships? Because my buddy does cruise ships and he said they're tough.

34:27David Spade:My friend was like, don't do it, it'll be really bad. And I was like, how could that be bad? How could that be bad? So I go there and

34:35Dana Carvey:cruise ships.

34:36David Spade:Three shows a night and it's a free show so everyone goes to the show because it's free, they already paid for it. And I'm bombing so hard It's mostly wheelchairs. It was a very old cruise.

34:46Kyle Dunnigan:You hear people leaving, they just... Yeah. And then the walkers after that.

34:50David Spade:Yeah. He'd buy WD-40 and he's... And I got...

34:55Dana Carvey:We love when David does... I know.

34:57David Spade:He does great sound effects.

35:00Dana Carvey:WD-40 gets underplayed in the world.

35:03Kyle Dunnigan:It's out there, though.

35:04David Spade:Yeah. But I was famous for being terrible on the ship, so I just hid in my room.

35:08Kyle Dunnigan:And then you go and you're looking over the Lido deck and it's like, that guy sucked. Are you the guy that's horrible? Yeah. So you bombed the first night.

35:14David Spade:No, I bombed every night. No, nothing. Three times a night. Three times a night where it was just this awful. And then one time, they make you, after the show, say goodbye to everybody. So you bombed, and you got a big thank you for coming. A little chance. Yeah. So I see this woman sort of hovering around me. And I'm like, oh, here's a fan. We'll have to deal with this. This is nice. And she goes, I have to tell you, you look exactly like my dead son. my son just died a month ago they were going to cancel this trip and they already bought the tickets and the dad won't look at me apparently I look amazingly and sound like her son who just died so I'm like oh my god I'm so sorry and then I keep running into her because the ship's not that big at the buffet by the pool everywhere and then I went to one bar and I'm like oh god there she is again and she's got the rest of her family and it was like there he is and everyone's like, oh God.

36:11David Spade:There he is. They're like, oh. She confused you dying on stage.

36:17Kyle Dunnigan:You both died. That's amazing. Once you died on stage, I was like, no, that's him.

36:22David Spade:And then she asked me to go rock climbing.

36:25Kyle Dunnigan:Trying to be the sun again?

36:26David Spade:Yeah. Wow. And I can't say no to her. So now I'm rock climbing and she's staring at me. She starts calling you Michael or something? She was sort of having this thing with me and I had to do it. And I could tell I wasn't. It's a good sitcom. As good as her son, she was like, just climb up. You're not acting. You're good at this. Yeah.

36:46Dana Carvey:So she's ordering you around like a mom to a son. Yeah. Just climb up. Yeah.

36:49David Spade:Yeah. And just come three feet up, terrified. And her son, I'm sure, was like, bing, bing. You're the worst fake son. Yeah, that was my— Oh, boy. That was the week that Obama was— Obama? Or not Obama, that bin Laden was killed.

37:07Dana Carvey:Is that Obama? That was my bin Laden. my Obama's not like this that's what you do my mom points like Obama you know not Obama so then how did you become a genius are they two different people points like Obama

37:25David Spade:I meant to say Bin Laden there might be something racist in there but like I kept saying Obama and Bin Laden but yeah she just points like a terrorist is saying their blood will run in the streets my mother's finger gets right in your face like that. Your mom's in your bit sometimes.

37:41Kyle Dunnigan:Yeah, she's really good, actually. Do you tell her what to do or not?

37:43David Spade:Yeah, I actually surprise her because once she knows she's acting, it's over.

37:47Kyle Dunnigan:It's over. She'll come on stage? No.

37:49David Spade:When you film stuff at home. Oh, you do videos? When she's doing dishes, I'll be like, hey, mom, let's... I'll just start doing something.

37:56Dana Carvey:She has to improv it? That's Craig.

37:59David Spade:Yeah, I do Craig to my mom.

38:01Dana Carvey:Which is hysterical.

38:02David Spade:Craig's hysterical. Thank you. Oh,

38:05Kyle Dunnigan:you didn't get to your SNL audition.

38:07Dana Carvey:Oh, yes, yes, yes. We want to get to that. We're just creeping up to like how many years of stand-up and then when do you try out for SNL?

38:13David Spade:Oh, yes. And the first time I did stand-up actually was in high school. It was 20 minutes before. My friends were like, you should do stand-up. And I was like, okay, because I just did what people told me. And I wrote a set in 20 minutes, and the set was 20 minutes. So I don't know what. That must have been very bad.

38:26Dana Carvey:First time usually crushes.

38:28David Spade:What's that?

38:28Dana Carvey:First time usually crushes.

38:30David Spade:It did pretty good because I was doing teachers and stuff like that. But I got suspended halfway through it.

38:37Dana Carvey:Everything that could go wrong is going to lie. Well, it's so funny, though.

38:42David Spade:Yeah, but halfway through, the host, this girl, was like, you have to stop saying something about, oh, you can't say penis or Miss Ola's going to suspend you, was the thing. And then they were all quiet, like, what happened? And I was like, I'm not allowed to say penis anymore. And then I started going, Mike, Kielbasa. And then I started doing other names. Then they took me off stage. Which anyway. They took you away. Yeah, they took me away in a jacket. But I start, yeah.

39:11Kyle Dunnigan:I like when you bump with the microphone with your chin while you're talking and you hug it like this. He's hugging it. He's bumping it.

39:18Dana Carvey:So when did you start crushing and get the notion, I want to, and I'm highly qualified, to be on Saturday Night Live?

39:27David Spade:I always wanted, like watching you and stuff, not that I felt like I'd be as good as you, but I thought like I can do that kind of thing. That's like in my wheelhouse. Yes. So I really want to do it. And I love the show. You actually almost stopped me from getting, from losing my virginity. It didn't happen, but you almost, I was coming home from a party and this woman who was, this girl, she's like 21, was in my Spanish class and she's on a balcony. She goes, Kyle Dunnigan, get up here. Just hammered. And like, we immediately had, she's decided we're having sex and i remember what happened in between but then i was like but i i almost didn't go up because i was like i want to go back and see dana carvey because snl was starting and i almost but i i wish i had because i i didn't think i got aids from this woman i knew i got aids from this woman it was back when if you just had unprotecting sex you got aids right right when it

40:26Kyle Dunnigan:started everyone thought yeah it's everyone's gonna get it so i wish i had me on the show i did and i I wish I hadn't. I got AIDS from watching Dana once. Yeah, yeah. So either way, you can't win. I have that effect on people.

40:37Dana Carvey:Fauci got me, took care of me. We give you a shot. You give me a shot. The boosters. So you do it accurately. I just punt sometimes. He does a quieter bun. I just decide how I want him to sound and hope people will believe me. He does quieter Fauci.

40:52David Spade:I'm a Dana Curry derivative. No, you're not. You had us crying, laughing, talking about Mickey Rooney.

41:01Dana Carvey:Yeah.

41:02David Spade:Mickey Rooney. I heard you do it before, but I know it's a true story. Word for work. You worked with him on a play?

41:09Dana Carvey:No, a TV show, One of the Boys, in 1981. I was cast out of nowhere. I was just a young stand-up. Fred Silverman, the head of NBC. That's Mickey Rooney's grandson. Then I'm on a 747 with Nathan Lane. He was going. That's right. He was your brother. And so we became friends, and then we met Mickey, who had a.38 revolver, and literally at least once an hour, I was the number one star in the world. You hear me? Bang. The world. Anyway. He's not kissing you.

41:39David Spade:He's pulling something. Yeah, he would say things like he needed money and he would just die laughing.

41:45Dana Carvey:Judy Garland never owned a car. It was non-separative. Why, Mickey? Because they pumped her so full of drugs they killed her. And then he would just look off into space. Yeah. Yeah. I asked him for money. and Joe Lewis, Joe Lewis, he'd be there studding you, studding you. He's getting right up in my face. He's about 4 '10". He's going like this right to my face. Joe Lewis, slam, bam, Joe Lewis. This fire plug will take you out. He referred to himself as a fire plug. That's another podcast entirely. But when I first met you, it was kind of interesting. I had dinner with you because David's very social and I'm a homebody.

42:23Dana Carvey:And I didn't really know what you did. I just thought you were funny and a really nice guy. and then I went home and looked you up and went, my God, this is my brother from another mother. I mean, it's an honor that you think that. Well, the evidence is on YouTube watching it. It's like extraordinary acid-y stuff. The way you do Stallone now, it's like a character as well. There's a sweetness to him kind of.

42:50David Spade:Yeah, it's different than he is. He's actually seen it, which is funny. We've had Frank Stallone on the show.

42:55Dana Carvey:Oh, really?

42:56David Spade:And it's really cool to, because some people like impressions, some people don't like.

43:00Dana Carvey:Why did you find that Stallone, that particular Stallone? You just started doing, and then you have. Yeah,

43:05David Spade:just, you know, it's a really, like the punchy Stallone, you know? With a sniffing. It's really stupid. It's like confident, you know? Yeah. Confidence stupid. But super sincere. Confidence stupidity. Confidence stupidity, you know? I just did like, I don't do, he like makes little movies and the last one, which got demonetized, everything gets demonetized that I put out, But he's like doing a documentary on 9-11. But it was like the day we got 9-11.

43:32Dana Carvey:Yeah, that's it.

43:33David Spade:The first building got 9-11.

43:36Kyle Dunnigan:What about this? Kyle and I joke about like if he goes on dates or, you know, we're obviously both older than our twilight years. Mature. Back nine. And when we're out, I remember I was with said Rick, our friend. All my friends are my age. So we were in Las Vegas. and we sat at this booth and this girl came. She was our hostess. So they like to blab and then the manager sends her, go talk to those guys. So she just sits with us, but no one invites her. She just sits there. She's 21. She's like, hey, guys, so if you're in Vegas, I'm like, yeah, that's a safe bet. And then she doesn't have much to say.

44:15Kyle Dunnigan:And so she goes, where are you staying? We're like, oh, at the Mirage. And she goes, oh, fun, that's the one. It's got a big fountain. She doesn't know anything. and then my buddy goes, you know, I was there when they built the Mirage. I was there opening night. She's like, huh? I go, Rick, quit advertising how fucking old we are. Like, built the Mirage. She doesn't even know that it was ever built. She goes, what? And he goes, yeah. And I go, oh, yeah. And we were at, he goes, remember the dunes before they blew it up? I go, Rick, it's getting worse. The monkeys were better than the bees. Yeah, he goes, ah.

44:45Kyle Dunnigan:I go, we were at Joey Bishop's 40th at the dunes. Were you there? No, I'm 21 years old and that was 200 years ago. and we just gotta be careful because you've said it before you slip and say something like I've got buddies who are like you know do you use compression socks and she's like huh I'm like why are you talking about the oldest things in the world I even feel old you don't wear that and he goes yeah and my other friend's like when I if I have like soreness and she goes I know my arm hurt yesterday and he's like oh do you think it's arthritis I go what it's not arthritis she's 21 quit saying the oldest, sickeningest words that even I'm at your table going, beat it, old man.

45:26Kyle Dunnigan:Yeah, he's not good for you.

45:29Dana Carvey:What's young schtick, though?

45:31Kyle Dunnigan:What would you say to a kid younger? No.

45:33David Spade:Like, I love, I love you.

45:35Kyle Dunnigan:No, there's no conversation. It's just she was doing her job to say hi. But this happens a lot when fans or some, or just anyone comes up and says hi, and then we just catch ourselves having, it's just too old.

45:47Dana Carvey:You're right, just references. The old vibe. It is hard.

45:50David Spade:my last date that I had I don't go on many dates because of what happens on them and she says to me well you're a little long in the tooth and I don't think we were talking about age or anything and I thought we had a yeah I never heard from her again long in the tooth long in the tooth

46:11Dana Carvey:that makes her seem old that's an old fashioned maybe she was 62 with a nice lift Yeah.

46:20David Spade:Yeah, dating's not been... I went on a date where the girl was... She showed up different than what her picture was. Just say that. Very different. Just say different, yeah. And she gets in the car, and she gets nauseous, and every five minutes we're pulling over for her to drool out of the car, and then she takes off her shoe and starts rubbing her bare foot, like, crossed over. Anyway, it's been going well. So anyway, about SNL. No, I like this one.

46:48Dana Carvey:I know a guy on a Tinder date with this woman, and she'd never, I guess she didn't have a lot of money, but they took her to her sushi restaurant, and she just kept saying, I want to stab it. I want to stab it. So she had a fork. She was just stabbing the sushi. What do you mean, just a little piece of sushi? Yeah. I want to stab it.

47:09Kyle Dunnigan:I'll tell you one last story of when my waiter, who's German, And I got, I was, there was a picture of me kissing a girl in a pool that was secretly taken or whatever. But it was kind of all over the place because it just was a weird match of people. Me and her. Actually, it was just weird because she was cute and I'm gross. That was very funny. That's really the headline. And so my waiter goes, hey. Not according to Daily Mail. So it's definitely very weird. You know, like, I obviously am aware of it and it's weird. And then about a week later, the guy goes, hey, he knows me. Yeah. How was your vacation, huh?

47:44Kyle Dunnigan:I go, okay And he goes, ah, a little pool party, huh? I go, yeah He goes, ah, a little fun in the sun, huh? I go, yeah And he goes, yeah I saw pictures of you kissing a girl Yeah, I know I know what you're talking about He goes, oh, why do they make you so fat in that? I go, what do you mean? He goes, you get out of the pool It's like, I didn't know you were kind of fat But why do you want that picture? I go, yeah I don't want that. What are you talking about? I go, that's what a paparazzi is. They take a hundred pictures of you and find the grossest one. And then they go, they got a jeweler's loop and they go, he looks fat and gross here.

48:22Kyle Dunnigan:We got a winner. Run with it. And then someone runs it to the press room. But he goes, no, I wouldn't pick. He doesn't get it. He goes, no, I wouldn't pick that one because, you know, you look kind of fat and you want to look good. I go, why aren't you? You don't understand what I'm saying. He goes, no. We need to get a lot of people out of your life. No, that guy, he's all right. Let's put on Speedos with three of us.

48:41Dana Carvey:Everyone just makes. Go to the beach.

48:43Kyle Dunnigan:I'm an easy target.

48:43Dana Carvey:Promenade around and then run to the web and see if Daily Mail. All right, SNL audition, that's all.

48:50David Spade:SNL audition, I guess.

48:51Dana Carvey:At this point, let's just say you're a seasoned stand-up and you probably do pretty much any accent and at least 50 top-notch. Have you done Amy Schumer's show yet at this point?

49:02Kyle Dunnigan:You've done any of that stuff, writing?

49:03David Spade:No, I had done Cedric, which was a sketch show, but I never worked on any. there was no reason to really work on any impressions or characters because I wasn't doing it on YouTube and there was no money in doing it. Right. I was doing stand-up and doing shame.

49:18Dana Carvey:Yeah, you do just straight stand-up. Yeah, just doing straight stand-up. Extremely funny as well.

49:24David Spade:Thank you. I always feel like Square Peg into doing stand-up. Like I'm trying to do scenes in stand-up. That was the same with me. Yeah?

49:32Dana Carvey:I didn't realize that until later. No wonder it was difficult in a honky-tonk bar. Show us your dick, you know? I am a French waiter. Now I'm trying to fool you.

49:43David Spade:Yeah. So what I did was I just made a random tape of impressions and sent it in not even thinking because nothing was going on. I was broke. And somehow they were like flew me out and decided that I would audition. And it felt like way too big suddenly. It was like the next day I was flying out and I'm trying to write the thing and I'm really, really nervous. and I'm in a hotel for two days just running it. And you got to be like, here's my six minutes or whatever. Trying to get it correctly on time, which is the wrong, you know, I know I'm in the wrong mind frame. And I get there and it was 30 of us.

50:22David Spade:It was Nick. 30? Yes, 30 people. Nick Kroll was there and he was talking about that. Yeah. And he was with John Mulaney, who looked really young. I was like, hey, how old? Do I know you? He's like, no, I'm five. I'm this many. So I was like, this guy's not going to make it. I've never heard of John Mulaney.

50:42Dana Carvey:Let me absorb that in a second. I'm five. He made jokes about how young he looked. He does. And he looked real, really young. Crazy for the high school students. So he's auditioning, too. He's auditioning. And it's the same night or day as Nick Kroll.

50:58David Spade:Nick Kroll. Okay. 30 people. 30. 30 people.

51:02Dana Carvey:That's a death march.

51:03David Spade:And I'm just like white knuckling. And I'm just like, please not first. I just want to go first.

51:08Dana Carvey:Yeah.

51:09David Spade:You know, let someone else figure this out. Can you hear? No.

51:14Dana Carvey:Was this in 8H?

51:15David Spade:I think people could actually. No, we were in the Conan Studio because they were doing the Olympics.

51:21Dana Carvey:Yeah, 6-4, Rock Foer Center.

51:23David Spade:But they're like, first up is Kyle Dunnigan. Out of 30? Yeah, I know. What are the odds of that? 3 % odds? 3.3 % odds? So I went into the, you can do this. Hey. You got this. You got this, buddy. Right. But I'm having trouble. He didn't have this. Go ahead. Spoiler. So they're micing me up, which is nerve-wracking in themselves when someone's micing you. And the camera guy's like, I'm going to count you in three, two, one. You're right. I'm getting nervous.

51:55Dana Carvey:This is so well told. Crew guys have too much power to ruin it. The mic thing and all that. Okay, kid. Yeah. Is that good for you? You like it right now? And they're not nervous at all. Where do you want your radio pack? You want it right in your pocket? Yeah, yeah. Exactly. It's all these questions you don't want to think about. Yeah.

52:08David Spade:So he goes, I'm going to count you right into your stuff. Three, two, one, you go right into your stuff. So he said to me, my stuff. So I had that locked in my head. So I walk out and the camera's in front of me and Lauren and everybody are to the left and I'm just staring at the camera.

52:20Dana Carvey:Oh no, any applause at all? No, just silence.

52:23David Spade:Nothing's happening. You just walk out. Nothing's happening. Nothing's happening. And then Lauren goes, hello? Like, hello? Say hello to us, we're over here. And I go, oh, hello, hi, hi. And I turn back to the camera and more dead silence. and the guy's not counting me in, you know? And then Lorne says something. I'm already on thin ice. And it's just crushed me through the ice. He goes, are you okay? Whoa. And then I start trying to tell him the guy. I go, well, he said three, two. He knows he's about to get tattled on, so he counts me in when the red light goes on. And I'm just destroyed. destroyed uh uh i i can't get to any facility or impression my brain's like look all hands on deck to make this guy pass out drop the bill bar we're not doing any of that we're just gonna breathe you know caitlin or you know but i think she wasn't alive it was alive she wasn't anyway um so i can't even they brought a piano out for me i can't play the piano like i'm just plonking on What's wrong with you?

53:29David Spade:And every impression sounds the same. I'm like, this is Chris Hansen. I'm Chris Hansen. This is blah, blah. I'm sort of outside myself. And then I walk out like I just got beat up. And then the producers go to everybody else. Guys, when you go out there, say hi to Lorne. Okay? Oh. And so everyone after me was like, hi. Yeah. Anyway. And be funny. It's fine.

53:51Dana Carvey:How many were out there? There's Lorne, there's like 10 people.

53:54David Spade:There's probably 10 people.

53:55Dana Carvey:And they were sort of to your left and the camera was center. Yeah, I didn't know where it played.

53:59David Spade:Yeah, I didn't know where it was. I don't know if it was good to them or the camera, but the camera guy, it seemed like that was the thing to do. Yeah. What was your Bill Maher there? Okay, people. Do you think you're one of those people? Well, let's hear Bill Maher. Yeah, keep going.

54:15Dana Carvey:No one, does anyone else do him?

54:18David Spade:I don't think.

54:19Dana Carvey:To me, your hook was the okay.

54:22David Spade:Okay, people. Yeah.

54:25Dana Carvey:Whiny, whiny, whiny. You think you're this and that.

54:27David Spade:You think you don't. You're wrong. Church lady, do you think there's a magic man in the sky? There's not. Okay.

54:34Dana Carvey:Okay. It's sustaining the okay.

54:38David Spade:Eve was a pig. She was made out of ribs. Okay.

54:43Dana Carvey:Yeah, because he admonishes his audience so directly. You think this and you think that.

54:49David Spade:Everything sounds sarcastic. You think you're good? I bet even if he was trying to be sincere. There we go. Yeah, I'm sort of like that where people think I'm not sincere. Him ordering frozen yogurt? I'll have the rum raisin. Because it's delicious. Okay. I'll have the go-gurt.

55:06Dana Carvey:What impressions did you do on SNL Audition? The attempted.

55:11David Spade:I did Chris Hansen. He was big at the time. How does he go? Can you do him now? You're not nervous now? Yeah, he was from To Catch a Predator. Oh, yeah. He was trying to have sex with old girls. His screen name was, yep, you guessed it, Boner 95. He was trying to have sex. He does like nine notes in the one word sax. He goes,

55:29Dana Carvey:Yeah, he's so lascivious. He's got a new show on. I was watching. It's just, everything is so cryptic. And it's come out, he's kind of a criminal, sort of,

55:40David Spade:which is interesting. He's quiet. He's quiet. Yeah.

55:44Dana Carvey:And what was your one that never failed that you couldn't get to that day with Lauren watching?

55:50David Spade:None of them sounded like any of them.

55:52Dana Carvey:Oh, you really couldn't get in the voice from nerves.

55:54David Spade:Yeah, I was so, shell-shocked. It's almost like if you're afraid of bees and there's bees around you, I couldn't even begin to get to what I, my voice.

56:04Dana Carvey:It's really so inefficient, this thing, because I, Steve Carell, when he auditioned for the show I did in 96,

56:11David Spade:you know. Yeah, that was great. He came in

56:13Dana Carvey:and he was really nervous. Yeah. You know, and he wasn't really doing well, but I was such a horrible auditioner that later I looked at his tape and of course, Louis and Smigel loved him too, but it was like, oh no, he was just nervous. Didn't mean a thing to me.

56:26Kyle Dunnigan:It would be almost better if you put it on tape and send it in because then you just do it in your own time, your own speed. You get it the best it is. I know.

56:33David Spade:I think so. And I hear that they do try to rattle you. I know Nick was saying that. So maybe they do, but they, Lauren, if you're listening, you don't have to. Everyone's really nervous. You're already really nervous. And I get it's a live show. You better be able to handle it. And there's an argument for that. Like I wasn't ready to do that show.

56:53Kyle Dunnigan:You know, it's funny when I don't remember this, but Louis CK, when he auditioned, I think he auditioned where we did maybe Catch Rising Star, one of those places, stand up comedy club where me and Robbie Schneider did. And when I was on the other side of it, it was like, oh, there's auditions tonight if anybody wants to go like Marcy would say, you guys. And so Downey, so a bunch of us went down because I was still a writer also and performer. had no pull but i don't know if it was lorne but it was maybe that first one is everybody else maybe it's lorne but you know it's still scary smigel downy frank and you know all of us and then a bunch of scattered writers and producers and then um louis said he was going on and we were walking in when they introduced him and he said i i shushed everyone to be quiet so he could start i don't remember that but it sounds about right that you would go i just did this two years ago and I know how sick he is backstage going oh no I gotta go on and then and then they're like you're up they're like well they're not here yet and then they go ladies and gentlemen and they go oh they're coming in and you're like wait that's exactly like a horrible situation what do you do do you not start your best jokes at the top no one's listening yeah everyone's like I'll get a vodka soda do you guys have a potato skins you know you're like yeah no no just listen right now

58:05Dana Carvey:that's the only part you need to hear and then we can do whatever at one point Lauren did stop me I got to be seen in a comedy club, but I also did the thing you did with like eight people there. Is that all you've got? Or is that pretty much what he said? Yeah. But I thought later it was to see if I would blink. But I had a rough childhood. I know yours was a peaches and cream. It really was. So I had a lot of anger in me that I would translate into competitiveness. Sometimes I had a little bit of like, okay.

58:40David Spade:I saw that audition that you're talking about. Yeah. It's online somewhere, and you were really funny. I remember that, and I remember thinking, wow, that's really tough. You were like, I remember there was like a microphone. You're like, oh, a penis. You started doing Rob Williams. Oh, a penis. Oh, a penis. Oh, a penis. Oh, look. Yeah, it was an easy one to do.

58:56Dana Carvey:I felt like I kind of bombed. I felt very nervous. But, you know, part of stand-up and show business is hiding nerves, right?

59:04David Spade:Yeah.

59:04Dana Carvey:That's it.

59:06Kyle Dunnigan:I think his argument is, well, when it's live to the world, we don't need you freezing up

59:10David Spade:I think that's a legit thing to do I just think that if you

59:16Dana Carvey:if the government mandated that you would do Saturday Night Live you would have flourished because you get desensitized it just takes time there's also once you have a job

59:27David Spade:I relax it's more like they're trying to get the job yeah because there's Lorne

59:34Dana Carvey:this is the thing and I came on there was just the original cast and then there's a Billy Crystal, Eddie Murphy years. So the legacy was only 10 years old. So people coming in now, it's like 45 years of comedians and pitchers. Here's what you got to compete with.

59:49David Spade:I think you saved the show because... I love you, Kyle. No, I mean, I really, if you think about, that show was dead. I mean, no, you elevated it. You saved it again. You're the funniest guy.

1:00:02Kyle Dunnigan:You kind of ruined it. You kept it on the air.

1:00:06Dana Carvey:it's at the baton I was like here Adam here Chris David

1:00:09Kyle Dunnigan:I can't even argue that Dana was so good on there

1:00:12David Spade:I want to also that time I don't remember anyone talking about it I mean Robert Downey Jr. was in the cast in 85 yeah did you overlap with him

1:00:20Dana Carvey:no I was right after that purge year weird cast where Madonna did the cold opening my first show saying that last year was just a dream it never happened

1:00:29David Spade:oh is that what she did yeah because it was like going to Iron Man for your laughs. He's great, but... But I was nervous as hell,

1:00:37Dana Carvey:and I had shitty shows, and, you know, it was just, you do get used to it, but there is an aggression to it. It's a rock and roll show. It's, like, aggressive.

1:00:46David Spade:It was scary being an extra, and they're, like, counting down, and all the extras get nervous. I thought I'd really made it or something, and they sent all the extras into the Donahue room, and they're like, you stay in here. You don't look at the cast in the eye. Yep. we're going to come in here every 20 minutes and beat you with a stick. And you could feel like, oh, we're.

1:01:07Kyle Dunnigan:I remember when Kyle came right up to me and he said, hey, you accidentally switched me in the booth during Gap Girls. And can you just go ahead and fix that? Because it's harder for me to be on camera. Actually, you were in one of my favorite Gap Girls ever sketches I ever did.

1:01:19David Spade:I know. It's funny. I have a memory of being there. Unreal. And that was interesting.

1:01:23Dana Carvey:So you were there as David's friend? You were friends at that point? No, I didn't know him.

1:01:26David Spade:Or didn't know him. I was in the booth with him.

1:01:28Kyle Dunnigan:Yeah. No, you were in the booth, not with us, but you were in the booth right on camera. I was with your friend. Oh, with my buddy. That's what you said. Yeah, we just flip-flopped sides to the back of my head. I'm sure he iced you once when he was on camera. He said once Farley sat down, his acting career was 100 % over. Because it was funny, funny. Then Farley shifted or something, and it was like an eclipse. Yeah.

1:01:50Dana Carvey:Arnold said that about Danny DeVito. You never get Danny, never have him sit down because he loses the energy. You've got to keep Danny on his feet. Keep him on his feet.

1:01:59David Spade:You've got to pump him up.

1:02:00Dana Carvey:Oh, you must do Arnold, of course. Who can't you do? Who do you want to do?

1:02:05Kyle Dunnigan:Who are your favorites that you do? I can't do you guys. Did you do anything on Amy Schumer? Hi, no one can do my voice. I have a blank voice. Hi, I'm Dana Garvey.

1:02:11Dana Carvey:He has a voice.

1:02:13David Spade:He has kind of a cool... He has a throwaway thing that I start to do and I don't think about it. Doing him? A throwaway thing. Can you get to his timber, though?

1:02:22Dana Carvey:Because he has kind of a... This is David Spade, everybody. He has kind of a timber that's a lower register. It's more of a laziness.

1:02:29Kyle Dunnigan:It's more of a laziness. Because my jaw always hurts my neck, so I don't move my mouth. Does that keep you down? My jaw is hurting me. Hey, ladies, what's up, girls? No, it's just sexy. There's only one word to describe it. When you were on Amy Schumer, you were a writer, and did you—we'll get you out of here soon. Yeah, what's Amy Schumer like? Was it fun to be a writer on that? Was it—you wrote some good sketches. It was pretty much a heyday for her show, right?

1:02:51Dana Carvey:It was a big, big show.

1:02:53Kyle Dunnigan:Big show.

1:02:53David Spade:Yeah, it was a really good schedule, too, because we'd come in and have, like, really basic pitches. like this is a guy who owns a hamburger shop but he's afraid of hamburgers or whatever that'd be your whole pitch you'd bring him five and then they go okay right scared hamburger guy and this other sketch and we'd go home for three days and we'd send it in on Thursday oh really and then on Friday we'd get notes and then we'd fix it so it's like we lived lives oh you didn't just sit there because then we had soak and sweat and fear like we did

1:03:22Dana Carvey:so you got trained to be a sketch writer on that show they hired you from your stand up or how did you just networked in

1:03:29David Spade:hired me from stand-up.

1:03:30Dana Carvey:So there was no crazy audition with Amy there going on? Did you worm your way on?

1:03:34David Spade:You don't want to audition me. I don't know if you've heard of what happens.

1:03:38Dana Carvey:What? What? What are you talking about? We want to trend. We never trend. She's funny, man. We would love to be on the show, Amy.

1:03:47Kyle Dunnigan:Yeah, did you get on the show? Did you do anything on the show?

1:03:50David Spade:Originally, I was on a few things. Okay, could you have a softer answer?

1:03:57Kyle Dunnigan:and then I was on this show what was the highlight

1:04:06Dana Carvey:so far then when did you just fucking destroy at a club or a gig that you went okay because I've seen some I think you were in Toronto Montreal and you're destroying just stand up you saw me there? no I saw it on YouTube I mean it was kind of destruction I remember it being Oh thanks

1:04:29David Spade:Yeah

1:04:30Dana Carvey:Have you ever destroyed

1:04:31Kyle Dunnigan:Or are you not remembering this Dana said I just destroyed

1:04:33Dana Carvey:I think you must have destroyed Because I look at the talent And then I think A number of times on stage I mean what are you He's got it

1:04:41Kyle Dunnigan:You killed a couple years ago somewhere

1:04:43Dana Carvey:I'm not gonna follow you If we go out On a little fun night David likes to hit the clubs Hit it That was Kyle Dunn again And now Dana Farfo The living museum piece That's what I feel He's still alive! Let's bring him out! No, you do. The longer you stay around, you become a museum piece.

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1:05:38Kyle Dunnigan:Then around age four, kids transition to the smaller Lego bricks, and suddenly you're watching real structures take shape, real ideas form, and their imagination really take off. They begin with simple stacking, but over time they grow into full-on creators, building worlds, stories, and things you never would have expected. That's the kind of magic of Lego bricks. You're not buying a phase. You're starting a journey. Learn more and start building today with Lego bricks.

1:06:06David Spade:Trade the game or the film awards on Kelsey. Basketball season is in full swing. Don't miss your shot on the hardwood at calling upsets and picking winners. It's conference tournament week and teams are fighting to make the tournament. The film awards are around the corner. Will Timothee Chalamet take it? Make money on your opinion. Kelsey is available in all 50 states. Download the Kelsey app and use code FAN to get$10 when you trade 100. Kelsey, trade on anything.

1:06:36David Spade:When you want your spring break to feel like... And your kid's pool day to feel like... And your hotel bed to feel like... Ooh, and room service to feel like. Because at Hilton, hospitality feels like. Your cabana's ready. Would you like fresh towels? It matters where you stay. Book now at Hilton.com.

1:07:03Dana Carvey:Hilton, for this day.

1:07:09Kyle Dunnigan:I followed Seinfeld the other day. Can I get a picture, dude? Seinfeld goes, I'm going to go do some new stuff. I go, all right. And I'm like, oh, this is great news.

1:07:17Dana Carvey:maybe he'll bomb you know you're gonna follow jerry's it was just at the improv he just came

1:07:22Kyle Dunnigan:up and he goes i'm gonna do the set you want to go on and you want me to go on i want you go and then you can get out of here and uh we shot the shit for a little bit he was gonna try some stuff and then when i followed him i go um i think that stuff's working i don't know i think it's done he fixed it yeah it's not really amateur hour he's no one works harder yeah he's too good

1:07:42Dana Carvey:Or Louie's as well, but just as far as just writing, just writing and writing.

1:07:47David Spade:Of course. Yeah. I did the Comedy Cellar, and it was Jerry Seinfeld went up, then Robin Williams, and then Chris Rock, and then I was next. This is—

1:07:58Dana Carvey:Well, that would be a tough— After Robin died? Before?

1:08:01David Spade:When was this? It was just after he died. That's a tough spot.

1:08:05Dana Carvey:It was a tough spot. Oh, look at this one. Oh, the Leprechaun Man. All right, my last story. We represent the lollipop guild. No, Robin was a fly.

1:08:19Kyle Dunnigan:I was doing the improv, and they said, you know, I hosted it a lot when I was in the beginning, before SNL and all that, just to get on. I mean, of course, they go. Bud would say, oh, David, why don't you,

1:08:32Dana Carvey:do you want to stay in the halls?

1:08:33Kyle Dunnigan:Don't stand in the halls. And he goes, do you want to host one night? It's not about the money, it's the honor. and I was like, do I get a pineapple chicken dinner at least? Because I'd have to eat there because I had no money. So I was, now and then they'd have a showcase night so they had me do seven minutes for Star Search or whoever and I'm standing there waiting and it's a good crowd, it's packed and I'm next and the guy's finishing up, he got the light and then behind me I hear, her, touch shoulder, David Spade. And I go, oh hey Robin, I don't know Robin really well at all, I met him through Bobcat.

1:09:08Kyle Dunnigan:and I go oh hey and then it hit me you're not fucking gonna go on you know and he goes I'm just gonna jump on real quick I go of course and then he went on did 45 and he annihilated raped and pillaged and then and while I was like a salmon because he walked off and the whole crowd left with him and I was trying to get to the stage and followed him into the street yeah like the Pied Piper yeah I was like excuse me pardon me like Bugs Bunny and I finally get to the stage there was about 18 people out of the whole club and all the people that went to see me laugh. They're like, it's not going to get any better than that.

1:09:39David Spade:I had one run in with Bud where I was the comic strip in New York and I was eating Chinese food and he goes, hey, can I have a little bit of that? And I go, no. And he goes, I don't know who you are, but you'll never work in LA. I thought he was joking. I thought he was joking back. And he may have been joking. I still don't know this day. Who was talking to you? Bud Friedman. He was in New York? Yeah, he's still on a comic strip. Yeah, I thought we were kind of joking.

1:10:02Dana Carvey:Take it outside? I did him on SNL. Didn't do very well. Take it outside, take it outside. And the monocle, it kind of bombed it. Just for the fans listening, Robin Williams, I got to know him really well the last five, ten years of his life because he moved out to Marin where I was raising my kids. Played a little local theater. Yeah, this shyest, sweetest dichotomy between the powerhouse on stage. And to me, it's like Elvis charisma because he was so introvert, so shy, and so deferential. Called everyone boss. Okay, boss. All right, boss. And then he would go on stage, and he had such likability.

1:10:36Dana Carvey:And to me, he was like a Shakespearean actor coming on stage as if he had nothing. So he created this whole, because he was always saying, well, did I take anything from you? He was always making amends. I said, no, I tried to be you. I stole your whole act. Yeah. Right, he walks on like he's got nothing and then he's, even the improv,

1:10:56Kyle Dunnigan:it's a Rolodex of like, if I think of this, I do have a joke about that. Yeah, yeah, right. If you say this.

1:11:02Dana Carvey:In his commitment, you know, he'd pick up a little plastic thing. Oh, flying saucer. There was just one time, I think it was Albert Brooks, it said, Robin, it's okay. Because when Robin would get on, he couldn't stop himself. Yeah, yeah. Anyway.

1:11:15Kyle Dunnigan:All right, well, enough about Kyle. Let's, um. Yeah, let's start the podcast.

1:11:20Dana Carvey:I'm warmed up.

1:11:21Kyle Dunnigan:Kyle did a great job. And Kyle's a guy you got to check out on YouTube. Kyle Dunnegan.

1:11:25Dana Carvey:Okay, compliment alert. Good. If you like comedy, you've got to go on Kyle Dunnegan. YouTube channel. KyleDunigan.com or, yeah, that's KyleDunigan.com. KyleDunigan.com.

1:11:38Kyle Dunnigan:I wear your merch hoodie

1:11:40David Spade:and I've sold a couple since then. Really?

1:11:43Dana Carvey:There's a plethora. I love it. And what is your latest favorite voice? Is it Biden? Because he's so current now.

1:11:49David Spade:Yeah, I like Biden. Also Alec Baldwin. Yeah, that's a really interesting take.

1:11:53Dana Carvey:We have a little bit of a, to finish off today, our little impression cavalcade. Hey, Alec Baldwin, How are you doing? Doing well. We're thinking of finishing Rust, but I haven't pulled the trigger yet. My wife, Ilaria.

1:12:10David Spade:She was born in España in a little town known as Boston, Massachusetts.

1:12:17Dana Carvey:Well, what does Elon Musk think of this?

1:12:21David Spade:It's pretty cool. Rust is probably going to be a pretty cool movie. A precious jukebox.

1:12:30Kyle Dunnigan:Doesn't Alec Baldwin's wife have another little baby named Ilaria?

1:12:34David Spade:They're all called Ilaria.

1:12:36Kyle Dunnigan:They all are. I have 19 children. But it's not an H, it's an I, it's Ilaria. It's Ilaria, and there's an Ilaria, and there's Hilaria. Ilaria.

1:12:45David Spade:Ilaria. Okay. He did an Instagram where he went off on, I love my children. Sure, I'd like to be playing poker with a guy sometimes, or going to a film, or seeing an opera, or playing golf. And he listed for 20 minutes.

1:12:58Dana Carvey:100 things you'd rather do what's your Trump what do you do with Trump

1:13:03David Spade:so terrific my Trump it's the best Trump it's gotta be the most fantastical Trump it's really not but it's like silly it's like exaggerated I did him before before he ran he was present stuff but it never got better because people who do it that guy on SNL does it really really well yeah I do trans Trump trans Trump

1:13:26Dana Carvey:what is that like Don't ask

1:13:29David Spade:It's the same Don't ask

1:13:31Dana Carvey:Oh okay He's trying to get elected

1:13:34David Spade:For the next 2024 Look We'll just end there Listen Thank you so much CarlDenia.com

1:13:40Dana Carvey:I was going to do Trump applying chapstick We're going to put it on We're going to put a lot of on Let me tell you The lips are going to get soft You're going to love them Like you wouldn't believe Cherry Cherry on top

1:13:52David Spade:All different flavors I like the ham Ray Liotta The late grape Brilliant Ray Liotta How do you do Ray Liotta? Fucking Chantix. You know, it was that Chantix commercial. I did a thing where he's like, what? How about the smoke? Try fucking Chantix. Why would you want to quit smoking? Why would you do that?

1:14:12David Spade:Why would you want to quit smoking?

1:14:15Dana Carvey:See, it works. How would Sylvester Stallone sum up? I hate when people do this to me. Oh, my God, yeah. Sum up the podcast, Stallone.

1:14:22David Spade:First, I like the beginning when everyone said Kyle was funny. then the beginning got a little weird when Kyle was talking then the end was nice when people said Kyle was funny

1:14:33Kyle Dunnigan:that's a good summary alright everyone grab a protein bar on the way enjoy it thank you Kyle thank you guys we appreciate it thank you bye guys

1:14:46Kyle Dunnigan:hey guys if you're loving this podcast which you are be sure to click follow on your favorite podcast app give us a review five star rating or maybe even share an episode that you've loved with a friend. If you're watching this episode on YouTube, please subscribe. We're on video now! Fly on the Wall is presented by Odyssey, an executive produced by Danny Carvey and David Spade, Heather Santoro and Greg Holtzman, Maddie Sprung-Kaiser and Leah Reese Dennis of Odyssey.

1:15:13Dana Carvey:Our senior producer is Greg Holtzman and the show is produced and edited by Phil Sweetech. Booking by Cultivated Entertainment. Special thanks to Patrick Fogarty. Evan Cox, Maura Curran, Melissa Wester, Hillary Shuff, Eric Donnelly, Colin Gaynor, Sean Cherry, Kurt Courtney, and Lauren Vieira.

1:15:36Kyle Dunnigan:Reach out with us. Any questions to be asked and answered on the show, you can email us at flyonthewallatodyssey.com. That's A-U-D-A-C-Y dot com.