Teri Hatcher (IN STUDIO) Is “Real and Spectacular”

9:06Teri Hatcher:Andrea Bowen, who was my television daughter, and Emerson Tenney, who's my real life daughter. Yeah, he's pregnant. And the thing that I thought was fun about that, because Andrea said, would you ever want to do this Desperate Housewives rewatch? And I was sort of like, you know, I don't know. but I but what I thought was interesting and what I like about podcasts like you guys for example I just like friends talking you know and when I'm I'm I'm doing my dishes I've got my headphones on I'm cleaning my house whatever um it's enough with the news and enough with the self-help and you know I listen to those too yeah but I really like the just the community and just the talking it's almost like having dinner it's almost like that's because Dane and I will obviously talk over you the whole time.

9:51Perfect. It's like dinner. So you just talk about whatever.

9:53Dana Carvey:We're looking really good. We tend to jump in. Sorry. I love that. Stop the momentum.

9:57Teri Hatcher:Oh, okay. But it's hard. It's like that when you're all together for dinner and you just bullshit around. So nothing too important. But we do want to talk about the podcast because it is sort of an exciting new thing for you. And you have a good voice. Thank you. That's part of it. You can talk. Thank you. I can talk. That's good. I mean, you like to talk, right? Not everybody can. You like to chat.

10:15Dana Carvey:I listened to, I think it was the pilot. Oh, did you?

10:18Teri Hatcher:Yeah. Thank you very much.

10:18Dana Carvey:It's got a lot of chemistry, the three of you.

10:20Teri Hatcher:Yeah, I think we do. So the elements of Beyond the Desperate Housewives of it, which there is a big fan base for it. And it is kind of fun, actually. I haven't seen the show in 20 years and was genuinely surprised and pleased, almost like watching something that I wasn't in. Like, wow, that's a great show. Yeah, a fun show. And so that's fun, but we're really using it as a springboard to kind of talk about life. And I felt like, you know, my daughter is 27. She's a screenwriter. She's gay. She has a wonderful girlfriend that she lives with. Andrea is 35. She's newly married. She's about to have a baby.

11:01Teri Hatcher:And I'm 60 and pathetically single. And it just felt like we covered everything.

11:05Dana Carvey:Well, I'm actually starting a podcast called Pathetically Single. Okay, you ripped off my – that was my next – Well, I'm a host. I wasn't going to host. We could co-host. Oh, I could. Because I'm married. Oh, so you could be pathetically married. I'm good to you. Pathetically single. You could do a spinoff. I love it. I love it.

11:21Teri Hatcher:You've got to start somewhere.

11:22Dana Carvey:How could you be single?

11:24Teri Hatcher:Well, I never leave my house. By choice, you don't.

11:28Dana Carvey:Agoraphobic, check. I'm sure you get marriage proposals weekly.

11:32Teri Hatcher:Nothing. I don't date. You know, I did maybe up to like five years ago, I kind of did the whole app routine and whatever. Not for very long.

11:42Dana Carvey:You're a tender and all that type of stuff.

11:43Teri Hatcher:You know, a little bit. Wordle. Huh? Wordle. Oh, I still. You're made on Wordle. I still do Wordle. That's a good idea. I do still do Wordle. I do Wordle. I do the spelling bee. I get so proud when I'm a genius. That's like when they tell you. Text me when you get a good one and I'll say good job. Oh, okay.

12:02Dana Carvey:Okay. You come from a high pedigree. Your dad, wasn't he an atomic physicist? Smart family.

12:08Teri Hatcher:He was a physicist and electrical engineer. He was vice president of AMD when he retired. And my mom worked for Lockheed for like 25 years. They were both super smart people. And I was a math major in college until I dropped out because my parents wouldn't pay for me to study anything else. And I got this crazy opportunity to be on the love boat. I mean, it's a weird origin story. Fucking love boat. I love the love boat. From a mathematician to Gavin McCloud. Yeah. To Isaac. What happened with you and Isaac? Nothing happened. with me and Isaac. Oh, I think something happened. No, nothing happened with me and Isaac.

12:43Teri Hatcher:Isaac got around. Isaac was a ship's bartender. I did, I think it was 26 or 22. Shut up. Oh, you're on that much? Yeah, well, it was the entire last year of the show. Were you the Julie McCoy? No, but Julie, the way I got an agent, like, oh my God, I can't believe I'm telling you guys this story. This is great.

13:02Dana Carvey:Please, I'm going to record. Okay, so I was in college.

13:04Teri Hatcher:I tried to make it so fast because I don't want to bore you to death.

13:07Dana Carvey:No, I'm just curious how, like, Like did someone – did you – you're a nerd, a mathematician in college. Did someone say, hey, Terry, take those glasses off? Like not so bad. With a British accent. With a bad British accent.

13:21Teri Hatcher:That's how they did it.

13:21Dana Carvey:You ought to be in television or movies. You know, was it kind of – you were sort of a nerd and all of a sudden you're a beauty queen? Okay.

13:29Teri Hatcher:So I was a nerd and am a nerd. I wear the nerd badge. I love puzzles. I mean I'm still a nerd. I'm totally a nerd. which is maybe why I don't date because I'm too shy. Anyway, we're going to get there. We'll be dating back at the end of this podcast. Okay, so I'm in college and the Love Boat did this nationwide press thing where they did this for dancers, dancers and singers. Okay. And they were called the Mermaids. And so in San Francisco, they did it in Chicago and New York and Dallas and wherever. And I don't know, 5 ,000 people showed up in San Francisco like a cattle call. and this girlfriend wanted to do it but she didn't want to go by herself so she said classic yes right so I ended up tag along do not bring your prettier girlfriend that's a mistake there's your lesson number one so I won that and then what they did with all these individual winners you won it casually in front of your person

14:24Dana Carvey:just for a second just for a second she brings you along gee I'll tag along you've got orthodonture work and stuff so did you sing and dance or what did you do

14:34Teri Hatcher:we didn't sing at that point We just danced. So it was like a chorus line kind of a thing, you know, where you get eliminated.

14:40Dana Carvey:So you want to dance solo in one? Or how did you? Could you dance?

14:42Teri Hatcher:Well, you, I do dance. I grew up dancing. Okay. No, I was, we had to do a jazz combination and tap lessons. And you could just tap. And I could just do that.

14:51Dana Carvey:Because you had a kid.

14:51Teri Hatcher:Because I grew up, no, no, no. Because I, yeah, I just grew up dancing. I was.

14:55Dana Carvey:Like in your room and stuff.

14:57Teri Hatcher:Like professional. No, no. Like, I mean, not like paid, but I went to dance class to a studio my whole upbringing.

15:02Dana Carvey:And your friend brought you anyway. Well, she did too, you know.

15:05Teri Hatcher:Oh, okay. And there was a lot of great people there, I mean, for sure. And it's that weird thing where you get a number and they teach you a combination and 30 of you do it and you leave and you leave and you stay and then you do it again. And at the end of the day, there's five of you left. Yeah. And then they pick a winner and that was me. And so they flew all of these different winners to Los Angeles where we had to do the whole thing again against like real people who already lived in L.A. and were already working on television and whatever. This was from the nationwide. Yes. But to me, you know, I think I might be wrong.

15:43Teri Hatcher:Maybe I'd never been on a plane by myself. I definitely had never been given per diem or stayed in a nice hotel by myself. They put us up. This is in like 1985. They put us up at the Bonaventure Hotel downtown, and we had a per diem. And so I, of course, ordered like a banana split and like a hamburger and like all the – I never had room service. I didn't grow up like that at all. I mean, neither. How fun. I mean, this is what I remember. I remember that I ordered a hot fudge sundae, which seems insane that the next day I had to go perform and be sexy, and that's what I was doing, but whatever.

16:17Teri Hatcher:Wait. How old again? I guess – well, it was 85, so that would have made me 20. Okay. So that's old enough to fly alone. Okay, yeah. But I mean, I just didn't grow up in a family where that was a thing. No, I didn't fly until I was 25. A lot of people don't fly. Yeah. I mean, maybe I went to New York once.

16:37Dana Carvey:You know, David, people keep asking about my 2026 resolutions. Yes, they do. I've been one of them. I know what you're trying to say. The people keep asking about your 2026 resolutions. And I've got the usual ones. Read more. or read it all hit the gym at the gym learn how to crochet get the knitting needles out of the closet yeah but this year the goal at the very top of my list is simple get comfy i've learned that from abby yeah and that's exactly where bombas comes in they're bringing next level comfort to uh my everyday essentials take the new bombas sports socks they're designed with sport specific comfort for everything from running hiking golf that's what i do skiing and i know you want to get back into running they got some socks i would really want to get back into running honestly for sure i do a lot of hiking yeah they're cushioned right where you need it most sweat wicking that's good is that good yeah it keeps the sweat away packs with tech that keeps you comfortable and locked in so comfy socks it's a great idea so for everyday around the house resolutions bombas has the comfiest footwear imaginable i've been living in their sherpa sunday slippers for things like weekend resets when i'm spring cleaning when i'm just doing this and that around the house honestly they look very squishy and uh you wouldn't know this but it's like walking on clouds underneath it all bombas yeah underwear and t-shirts yeah david they're flexible breathable and buttery smooth plus for every item you buy one is donated to someone facing housing insecurity head over to bombas.com flywall and use code flywall for 20 off your first purchase that's B-O-M-B-A-S dot com slash flywall.

18:43Code flywall at checkout. I just have to tell you, Dana, there's something I'm excited about. Yes, 100%. Now, you remember we talked about Jury Duty, the show. Oh, yeah. Season one, yeah. Yeah. And that one, I saw it on TikTok, and then it was kind of a word of mouth thing. It blew up. It was funny. And it actually all pulled together, which I was shocked they pulled that thing together. uh and i was like i would will they do it again and they did and cool i think that's very cool it was set in the courtroom the first time and uh this is going to be a company retreat hmm yeah yeah jury duty presents company retreat it takes this groundbreaking social experiment out of the courthouse stay with me dana i got it and drops it into the most relatable setting ever the company corporate retreat.

19:37And if you've ever survived that awkward team building exercises or a trust fall with coworkers, you know the vibe.

19:45Dana Carvey:Yeah. I mean, this is an inspired idea, I got to say, after jury duty to put it in a company retreat. This season follows Anthony, a real temp hired by Rockin' Grandma's Hot Sauce for their annual retreat. Right there, they should figure it out, Rockin' Grandma's Hot Sauce. Yeah, I know. Except he has no idea the entire thing is staged around him. It's a workplace comedy meets hidden camera. And it's unpredictable. It's authentic. It's so full of heart. The stakes are higher. The laughs are bigger. And it still celebrates the goodness in people. And here's the wild part. Rockin' Grandma's Hot Sauce, they're actually making it.

20:25Dana Carvey:Okay. And the flavors will be available on Amazon. Oh, my God. i wonder if they started that first or if they they just made up that name and then it sounded funny and it's going to get a lot of attention but you know this thing i'm kind of glad they didn't do it in the courtroom again because someone would figure that out i would think oh i don't think they could do it in the courtroom i think the company retreat is uh the next best one yeah it's hard to think of where to do it but they did a good job so yeah looking forward to that. Me too. Watch now on Prime Video.

20:59Teri Hatcher:I got this job. Then they picked eight of us to be the quote unquote mermaids, which were basically glorified extras on the love boat. We dealt the cards in the casino. We passed out towels on the Lido deck. All this shit for that. And we did a dance number every week and we sang. So probably nine episodes in was Thanksgiving. And the girl who played Julie McCoy came back. And remember, she had been ousted from like a, yeah, from a coke addiction or something. A little bit snippy-jiffy. I heard that. And so she had been fired, I guess, or lost her job. And then, so they had her back. And that episode, they decided to give my character like a story arc, like a love line.

21:42Dana Carvey:That's a big episode. It was. Did your character have a name when you were a mermaid? Well,

21:46Teri Hatcher:not until this episode. And then they gave me a name, Amy. Amy. It's really, I mean, I talk in the highest voice and she was the biggest ditzy, like airhead, fun loving.

21:58Dana Carvey:So you did a real character. Yeah, I did a character. You were supposed to do that.

22:02Teri Hatcher:I did. I mean, they were saying. No, they said that was what they wrote.

22:05Dana Carvey:Are you doing like Victoria Jackson?

22:07Teri Hatcher:Like falsetto almost? It was pretty high.

22:10Dana Carvey:That's how Victoria was.

22:11Teri Hatcher:It was pretty, you know, it was like, hi, I'm Amy and I did this and I did this and I did this. And then, you know, it was like that. Gotcha. But it was definitely comedic. for whatever that was on the love boat. And so an agent saw that and called the producers and was like, who's she? I mean, and that was how I first got an agent. And then when that was – That's great. Yeah, it's very strange. This would not happen to anyone anymore, I don't think.

22:37Dana Carvey:So our torturous eight years in the clubs was – what? I mean –

22:42Teri Hatcher:I mean, you know, it's funny. In these days, so I moved into a really, you know, below average apartment, building in North Hollywood. And next to me on the third floor, like walk up and next to me was an apartment of two young guys who were comedians who had just moved from Nebraska. One of them was Joel Madison. And one of them was Pat Hazel. And they knew Jeff Cesario and Dennis Miller. and like, and so I like met some of these people like back in, it was crazy times.

23:22Dana Carvey:Before they were famous. They're dentists for sure.

23:23Teri Hatcher:Yeah, I mean, yeah, they were like on the edge. I think Jeff and Dennis were kind of on the edge of almost being. Yeah, that was, yeah. Yeah, crazy. And I remember hanging out with them and they would play jokes on me and I remember one of them early on saying something like, you can hang out because you get the jokes. And I felt like that was a very big compliment. Because I'm obsessed. Every time I go to New York, I go to the Comedy Cellar. I'm just obsessed with what you guys do, with admiration. And I'm just obsessed.

24:02Dana Carvey:Really? Did Dennis ever ask you out?

24:05Teri Hatcher:I don't recall him asking me out. I do recall there being some discussion about making like a clay imprint of my ass, like for an ashtray or a bowl or something. And I don't know if this was around. From comedians? You didn't think this story was coming. No, I did not. I'm pretty sure you did not think this story was coming. Oh, no, it's on my notes. It's in your notes. Ceramic ass. Ceramic ass. I might have gone on a date with Jeff, maybe. Okay. You know, my whole crazy, slutty, young life is a little bit of a blur to me. I'm just thankful I came out of it without any major long-lasting issues.

24:51Dana Carvey:Really? We'll be the judge of that. Okay. Your 20s are your 20s. They're just unique, you know. So were you lonely at that point or were you sort of out of your element or just super excited? You're suddenly in North Hollywood. You're on Love Boat. You're on television.

25:08Teri Hatcher:I don't think I was lonely, although I do kind of feel like it took me – I was that kind of – I mean, I'm definitely an overachiever, like 150%. Like bar is very high. I'm super hard on myself. And so I was the kind of person who I was on the Love Boat. I also got a job on the short-lived soap opera Capitol at the time. And then I was also a waitress at an Italian restaurant on Ventura Boulevard. It might have been – I don't think it was Maria's Italian Kitchen. I was going to say Maria. It was something like Maria's. I don't think it was Maria's. But I remember at one point being in TV Guide and having like the bartender or another waitress be like, you should probably quit this job.

25:52Teri Hatcher:Like the job as the waitress. Because they're seeing your picture. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, and, but, you know, so when you say, I don't think I was lonely, but I definitely. It's weird. There's a lot of growing pains, and I didn't, you know, I didn't know. I'm the least Hollywood family. I'm the least Hollywood person. I don't know anything. I'm sure that I did so much wrong. And you came out from where? From Northern California. Northern California. From Sunnyvale. Okay, so it's quiet.

26:16Dana Carvey:Sunnyvale, which is 15 minutes where I grew up. San Carlos.

26:20Teri Hatcher:Okay, yeah, yeah.

26:21Dana Carvey:Yeah.

26:23Teri Hatcher:We're Northern California people. Used to play Rooster T. There you go. It's still there, right?

26:27Dana Carvey:It was the country store or something like that before, but Rooster Teeth Feathers is still there. I was playing that in the early 80s.

26:33Teri Hatcher:I was just talking to Ron Funches, who's a little bit of a friend of mine. Yeah, great. And I was at a barbecue at his house not that long ago, and he had a girlfriend comedian, and I'm not going to remember her name, but she was like my age, and she was saying that she was just going there to play. So, yeah. I mean, it is funny how it's all sort of this. Terry, you didn't know I had a Rooster Teeth Feathers story, but I do. Okay.

26:55Dana Carvey:I've got one too. You go first. Mine's not that exciting. What is it for the audience at home? For the audience at home, it was about 150 seat club.

27:04Teri Hatcher:That's another thing I want to talk to you about. You know, I've been to Kenny Bunkport and I was friends with him.

27:08Dana Carvey:Wow. Yeah. Come on down.

27:11Teri Hatcher:Come on down.

27:13Dana Carvey:Speed bump. Press her down.

27:16Teri Hatcher:Let's get some speed in that area. Yes. Let's get those ass imprints going.

27:23Dana Carvey:Ceramic imprinted. I never got a copy. Left and right coming together in a beautiful ceramic dish. Polka dots on top. Red on the bottom. Sorry. We can edit this.

27:34Teri Hatcher:I kind of wish it existed. I know. That is the thing about age. We really blew it. This could be good merch. Right. And you see, at the time, it seems like, oh, we've gone a step too far. But like 40 years later, you're like, God, I wish I had my ass in a bowl. Well, back to my tentpole story about rooster teeth feathers. story it's a real i really do so i so i go there and this is my struggle i was thinking about your days of like when i came from arizona i was in north hollywood too i was in kawanga moore park lived with an actress lived in the back room and uh got to see sort of her life but it does it's lonely it's just weird not to be in arizona anymore like everyone's like like if you had a picture tv guy a it doesn't mean you're making any money or you have steady money so i'd be like what would I quit for this is actual money versus that and they don't realize that they're like you're a star and then I and one of these gigs I go to Rooster Tees let's say I'm making 600 bucks for the week and uh and after the first show I just literally walk all the way like a mile to the club then I walk back to the condo or whatever hotel so I need some money for food so just for lunch so I walk all the way to the club when they're there and I go I need to take a draw and against my, I just need some money, like 200 bucks for food this week.

28:55And he goes, well, you did one show and you haven't quite made 200. So we can give you$83. And I said, do you think I'm going to make a run for it? You can eat a lot for an 83 bucks.

29:08Teri Hatcher:Especially in the 80s. An 83. So I ran to Sizzler. Sizzler, oh my God.

29:15Dana Carvey:I spent my 30th birthday at Sizzler. Sizzler. You know, I mean, this is the thing.

29:20Teri Hatcher:Those kinds of things. Like, I didn't grow up really with money. So, like, going to Farrell's for your birthday. Farrell's. Going to Farrell's and getting, like, the zoo with the little plastic animals in it. Right. Or going to Sizzler and getting a steak and the shrimp, the, like, fried shrimp. Or, like, the Velvet Turtle. Do you remember the Velvet Turtle? I remember the Velvet Turtle. The Velvet Turtle was like. That was in Arizona, I thought. Oh, okay. No, it was like a place where you could get lamb, rack of lamb with like the little chef's hat on the bone. And that was like a once a year thing.

29:53Is that nice though, the Velvet Turtle?

29:55Teri Hatcher:It was. That was like a once a year thing. I mean, to me, to my family. In Arizona, there was a nice one there. Yeah. But again, I think if you have good memories, I have good memories of going to Chili's, all these places. Chili's. Sizzler. So if you even get a few beans in your jeans when you're older, you go, that doesn't mean I don't like going there. I always liked it. So it's like stuck in my head that I like it. Yeah. So I don't like ever skip all that and go, I don't do that anymore. You still go? Yeah. To those kinds of places? Well, this is a trick question. I thought we were agreeing that we liked it.

30:26No, no.

30:26Teri Hatcher:He likes basic food. No, no. The only reason I wouldn't go is because I think my health awareness of like what I'm actually trying to eat to not have like inflammation or whatever, like that kind of nonsense, probably keeps me from going to those places.

30:43Dana Carvey:I think what's interesting.

30:44Teri Hatcher:But not because they weren't fun. Oh, no. I mean, those chili fries. Yeah, it's hard to get good stuff. The chili fries with the little salty whatever. Everything's great.

30:50Dana Carvey:If I'm driving long distance and I'm tired, that's the only time. Me too. What do you get? McDonald's hamburger, small fries, and a Coke. Because then all that sugar and salt just helps me drive.

31:02Teri Hatcher:So I'm Diet Coke and Cheetos on a long distance drive. Cheetos. Yeah, Cheetos and a Diet Coke. Yeah, that's the same kind of thing. We're all three Diet Coke. Carbohydrates. Diet Coke for me is like Coke. I mean, I never did Coke, so I don't really know. But to me, whenever I'm at, like if I'm shooting something or I'm at some event or I just feel like, oh my God, I'm hitting the wall. Like this is not. People know this. They know like Diet Coke, stat. I need it. Wakes you up or what? Yeah. It just, I don't know if it's the bubbles or the caffeine or whatever it is.

31:37Dana Carvey:You and Trump just died. Oh, shit. He has a button.

31:40Teri Hatcher:Okay, I'm going to stop. You're exactly Trump. I didn't know that. That's enough to make me never have it again.

31:46Dana Carvey:He has a button on his desk that he hits, right? Diet Coke. Really? Yeah, it's his button. Bring me a Diet Coke. Okay, I'm going to have to stop. I can drink it. Oh, you've ruined it. The Diet Coke as you do it. I do him gravelly. But I don't know where.

31:59Teri Hatcher:Oh, you've ruined it for me.

32:01Dana Carvey:No, not at all. But I only drink Coca-Cola. I drink the real stuff before, or I have it on stage when I do stand-up. Because you don't want a cup of coffee, but that's that energy thing, just a sip of Coke. and you know a lot of places don't have it you might notice if you travel there's full casinos, airlines they just go we're a Pepsi corporation

32:24Teri Hatcher:and I know this about I mean I have listened to you talk enough to know that you have a real issue with Diet Pepsi I start trouble, I fight back but sometimes I bring them

32:35Dana Carvey:Pepsi, the people who were running Coca-Cola I love that we all agree part they decided at one point the greatest brand in the last hundred years coca-cola you know gi's world war ii we're gonna make new coke the reason is they did taste tests and pepsi was sweeter than coke which i didn't like so when people were just testing it just taking sips they go we like this better a full can they wouldn't so some idiot at coca-cola decided to make new coke tasted too sweet then they bring out they brought it back but that's just a little history lesson in the middle

33:13Teri Hatcher:of our guest today is terry i love brands so i'm excited i'm excited too i was gonna ask you and

33:20Dana Carvey:david a question okay the the emotional when you're in your 20s and you're doing stuff and you don't know if you're gonna get a break but you're obviously in a game where people you know are getting on tv or films or and doing stuff and you go through a period where it's not really happening and you have i bombed i tried for snl i followed sam kennison at the comedy store bombed you know so how did you deal with that david or terry you want to go the emotional violence of going in this thing and just it may just never happen for me like i want it yeah we'd like to

33:55Teri Hatcher:hear from terry yeah okay well i seem to recall there being a moment where i felt like i should pack up my 1980 Ford Probe with the hand rolling windows and the no air conditioning and go back to Sunnyvale and go back to college. Like I feel like, and that was after the Love Boat, probably after I had a little stint on MacGyver and I did like, maybe I did a pilot or something. But yeah, there's these big stints where you feel like - Too much chunks off. Yeah, too much chunks off. And what are you doing with yourself? And I think when you're young, Like I really always thought I would go back to college.

34:32Teri Hatcher:I really thought I would be a math teacher in high school. I had this grand idea that there were no women teachers for young girls and no role models in the sort of science lane. And I was going to go be that. And that was going to be noble to me. And I really thought that was what I was going to do. And then I got Lois and Clark. And it wasn't until Lois and Clark that I – and it was even my parents' first time kind of on board. Like, oh, this is your career. Like, oh, okay. This is what you're going to be doing. This is what you're going to be doing. And so, yeah. And then, but there's always, I mean, I, you know, I'm not working a ton in the last few years.

35:13And that's not really my choice.

35:17Teri Hatcher:I mean, I've been developing some stuff with some pretty cool people. But I know you guys know that that's, it's hard to get things across the finish line. And I think, you know, I always had somebody, somebody told me a long time ago, like, you're only really out of this business when you quit. You know, like, I mean, you can see actors that like are now winning Emmys that literally didn't have jobs for five years, you know. Absolutely. And so, and I tell my daughter this, although she's a writer, not a performer. And it is a little bit, I think there's a little more power behind you can just keep doing, you can keep writing scripts.

35:50but um i would tell young actors that the thing they don't teach you with all your accents and

35:58Teri Hatcher:all your drama and all your comedy is they don't teach you what to do with yourself when you don't have a job and and that is where people get into trouble it gets it's a mental game yeah it's very tough when it goes down and we were just talking to uh to what you know dwight from the office rain and he said uh yeah it's like being in a read-through and you're not in the episode and even just that week you're like hmm so i'm watching everyone else what do i do and it's kind of nice for a while but maybe you had on desperate housewives when you you were lighting a show or you were in kind of light for a couple episodes in a row and you start to kind of freak out like wait am i not where am i in the pecking order don't i thought they kind of favored me it makes

36:38Dana Carvey:you crazy i think the main thing is because i met a lot of bitter people when i was first coming up really bitter all kinds of bitter well mickey rooney was the most bitter man i was the number one star in the world. You hear me? Bang. The world. So I thought, okay, this whole game of being in show business, it doesn't care about you. It's not personal. It's not trying to punish you and really stay away from victimhood and bitterness because then you can't be successful. So we always had stand-up as a baseline to go back. So when you had those years, I want to know the years between how long was it after Love Boat and then you were kind of doing stuff but not landing to Lois and Clark.

37:23Teri Hatcher:So I'm estimating, I mean, if that had been, let's say that was 85, 86, I didn't get Lois and Clark until 94. But before that, I did that, what turned out to be a very famous episode of Seinfeld. That was probably in 93.

37:39Dana Carvey:Okay.

37:39Teri Hatcher:Right. And I remember Jason Alexander saying to me, good things are going to happen to you. People do this show and then they go get other things. I remember him saying that to me. What was your episode? What was my episode? You really? I swear to God, I don't know. Okay, well, good. I'm glad that I'm glad somebody doesn't know. Because it's probably going to be on my tombstone. So that's why I'm just a little bit surprised. No, I had this episode where the whole episode was Jerry was dating me. And he didn't know if my breasts were real or fake. Oh. And so Julia's character falls on. They think they're fake.

38:17Teri Hatcher:He thinks they're fake, so he breaks up with me. And then she is at the gym with me, and she falls on me in the sauna and realizes they're real. So then he tries to win me back, but he's already broken up with me because he thought they were fake. And so I find out that he's done all this. And so I have this exit line where I find out, and I'm mad that he put me through this. And I'm like, I'm not going to date you anymore. You're a horrible person. And so I leave, and I slam the door, and then I stick my head back in, and I go, and by the way, they're real, and they're spectacular. and that sort of became like this thing.

38:51Yes. They're real and they're spectacular. That might look good on a tombstone. Yeah. That's pretty good.

38:54Teri Hatcher:She was real and spectacular. Yeah. There you go.

38:58Dana Carvey:I guess I can't put that on. You know that moment is Chase Alexander saying that to you. But that's great. So that actually on a hit show doing that. Go ahead.

39:05Teri Hatcher:So that had happened. I had done the movie The Big Picture with Christopher Guest. Great. That was my first movie ever. I remember you in that too. Thank you.

39:15Dana Carvey:Okay, so you're getting jobs.

39:16Teri Hatcher:Yeah, I had done Tango and Cash. I had done Soap Dish. Fuck yeah. Tango and Cash. Ford Fairland. Stallone. Yeah. Stallone. And Kurt Russell. And Kurt Russell, yeah. Yeah, yeah. I played Stallone's sister. I mean, I hardly remember it. You had some hair in that one, didn't you? Yeah, and do you know what's crazy? This is all of this hair. If you go back and you look at The Love Boat and you look at Tango and Cash and Soap Dish, I mean, freaking gigantic 80s, early 90s hair. it was all my hair because we just backcombed the crap out of it. It was before anybody was using all these clip-ins. Now you can't go anywhere without clip-ins.

39:53Teri Hatcher:Like it's, it's, it's just, you were killing it in the hair department. It's very funny. Yeah. Well, what about Soap Dish? Another fucking monster hit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So these are not like nothing, but these are huge. No, I know. Ford Fairline, I love because I think when Dice hosted. Oh, I wasn't in Ford Fairline. I did a movie with him called Brain Smasher. Oh. Why did I think Ford Fairline? Well, No, because that was that era. Okay. That's, he was doing, and I did do it. At least it was Dice. I was close. Yeah, yeah, you were. Yeah. That's fucking cool.

40:20Dana Carvey:Was it Brain Blaster? Brain Smasher.

40:22Teri Hatcher:I don't even remember. Honestly, I don't know. I just know he was in it, and we shot it in Oregon, and I don't, and it was like an all-night shoot of a movie. Yuck. You know, just for six weeks, you're completely going to work at night. That'll fuck you. They don't tell you that in class either. How bad night shoots are. That's true. No, so I had a lot of, and there were things that I had near misses on. Like I near missed on a movie that Sandra Bullock ended up doing and I near missed on a thing that Helen Hunt did. And I like it is – and I think what I also love about aging is that, you know, there's just no room to get caught up in regret.

40:58Teri Hatcher:Like life has offered you what it has offered you. And you did your best with the tools that you had at the time that you had them. Absolutely. And it doesn't mean you can't evolve and become a better person or make more of your life than you anticipated. It just means you can't go back. And so there's no reason to keep harping on it and keep dwelling in it.

41:21Dana Carvey:Sometimes I have regrets about choices. People do it. Yeah, we all do. I do it. But I do think that it's good to just stay in the moment. And, you know, those near misses, that's a pretty common story before people get the one. But nothing beats a weekly show.

41:40Teri Hatcher:It's very true. And I wish I had one again. I just auditioned for one yesterday for like a smaller role in it, but it's still a series regular. And the fantasy that I'm living with before they reject me, which will probably happen later today. We're good luck charms.

41:55Dana Carvey:Okay. Well, maybe it won't then.

41:57Teri Hatcher:But the fantasy I have in my head is about getting to show up on a set regularly. And probably maybe I'll have one line because it's not like the main character. But like it would just be. Less stress. I would just. It would just be fun.

42:09Dana Carvey:Structure. And then you're coming back to it with your eyes now.

42:12Teri Hatcher:Like, oh, wow.

42:13Dana Carvey:Yeah. We're putting on a little show. Yeah. Let's not take it too seriously. It's all pretend. Yeah. Have more fun with it. You know, we did just shoot me. George Siegel had. Everyone on that show had done some good things and then had some tough times. And so it was a good mix of people that are like, we're so lucky to have this show. So there was no prima donnas other than me. There was no assholes other than me. So that was a sort of good lesson. But I had my own things. I had a tough time on SNL. So getting on something where someone was writing for me and it was steady. And about fame, like you're saying you're in big picture.

42:49Great. I remember that perfectly. And the other movies, I saw Tango and Cash, of course. and soap dish. So you're building, building, building and then when you get on a weekly thing, that's where fame hits because when people see you over and over and over and then Lois and Clark was a pretty big deal so there's TV Guide, there's more from that and then it's like almost overwhelming probably.

43:11Teri Hatcher:Yeah, I mean it's also I'm also like a really hard worker and like those shows you work like back in those days 75 hours a week. I mean you would start every Monday at 4 a.m. and every Friday you'd be working till 4 a.m. like it was you're not allowed to complain because everyone's like oh you're on a hit fucking show yeah and that was 10 months a year and I mean it and and so you're not really thinking you're there's no room really for joy of like oh I'm I mean you're just not you're not going to spas or dinner with your friends or you're just grinding it out you know you are kind of and so it really isn't until it's over that you get an opportunity to reflect back at what an amazing opportunity it was.

43:56Teri Hatcher:It's more like when you're in it, it's hard to not get caught up in what feels hard about it. It's not that you're not grateful. Like I feel like I'm always grateful, but it is, I mean, it's not unlike being the mother of a, of a young kid when you're just, you know, you obviously you're so thrilled to have a child, but then also you're not sleeping and you're not, you know, whatever. it's hard to put both of those things together and have it all feel positive all the time

44:26Dana Carvey:exhaustion it's like a baby exhaustion leads to frustration and tears

44:32Teri Hatcher:or whatever you want to call it like ER this Sherry Stringfeld remember she quit ER and people couldn't believe it I didn't remember that she did because she's making a ton of money but you're like can't do it anymore 10 months a year memorizing and grinding and everyone's like poor people work harder And I go, it's just a mental, you're not coming up for air. She probably just needed three months off, like four, just to see her friends, see her family, just get life back. And then go, okay, I'm back in a hole because they do a never-ending movie. Movies are so hard and that's what you were doing.

45:04Teri Hatcher:And you also don't know what's – it was interesting. I just saw Jane Fonda talking on a podcast yesterday and she referenced that in the first season of the show that she did with Lily Tomlin recently. Yeah, Frankie. Yeah, that it was horrible for her. These are her words. And she said she realized in hindsight because the subject matter was kind of like pushing very deep buttons for her about being abandoned. And and she had to go work on that and then was able to approach the second season. And then it was like all great after that. But it made me think, you just don't know what's going on. And we're so quick to judge and label and I don't know.

45:47Dana Carvey:You just don't know. I think it's a very common human thing to go, why is that person doing that? Why isn't Terry Hatcher going and doing that? I don't understand why they're doing that. And you have to be humble about, well, you don't know their story. Also, sometimes you want to work and you go, I just want to go work again. And then something comes along that's not a thousand percent what you want to do. but you go, let me just do it.

46:06Teri Hatcher:I totally want it. I feel like I'm out of the fucking mix. I totally want to work, which is why I got this opportunity to do a little bit of stand-up that I wrote for Showtime about four years ago. It was called, they have this thing called Funny Women of a Certain Age. So it sort of gives it an umbrella of like, okay, we know what these women are going to talk about. They're going to talk about being old, which made it easier for me to write in a way. and like Wendy Liebman was in it and Carol Montgomery and Marshall Warfield. They're like pros. Yeah, yeah, totally. Yeah, real pros. No, and we did it at the Irvine Improv and I wrote like a 15, 20 minute set.

46:47Jesus, that's a lot.

46:48Teri Hatcher:I know, right? That's hard. And I wasn't horrible and it did sort of, it was all anchored in this story that actually happened to me where I was told that I have an average vagina and I actually told I only told you that because

47:08Dana Carvey:Okay, alright we're going to take a short break Short break We're going to reset ourselves here No, it was just a pants you were wearing No, we got time for the rest of the story This is the president of Odyssey Communications Go ahead No, no

47:27Teri Hatcher:When I first met Brett Goldstein it was at a function for um ashling bay who's a mutual friend of ours and there was like a cocktail thing after she performed and i didn't know brett but i had just come from the gynecologist office and i'm way big overshare talk to strangers the older i get the do not ask me how my day is because like you're you better be ready to stand there for a while um and so anyways he said nice to meet you. How was your day? And so I proceeded to tell him this story. I don't do the very quick version of it for you guys. But it was it was like I was this was kind of the last time I started dating somebody, which is over six years ago.

48:10Teri Hatcher:And I hadn't had sex in a really long time because I hadn't been dating. And at my age, I was sort of thinking like, I don't know, does it work anymore? Like, how would I know? Like, nobody's been in there. And you know, this whole you can imagine. So I go to the gynecologist. David's uncomfortable. it's nice to see you squirm so you go to the gynecologist so i go to the gynecologist who happens to be named dr johnson like you can't make it up no i'm not kidding i feel like that happens my daughter has a dentist named dr needle i just don't there's got to be something happening there anyways so i go and and so he's giving me an exam and i'm laying there and i'm thinking like how do i say this like like and i'm kind of like um doctor what you know it's whatever and uh uh And then I finally go, does it look like a guy would have a good time in there?

48:57That wasn't what was supposed to come up.

49:00Teri Hatcher:And so he sort of backs away. And this is all real, okay? I mean, I wrote more stuff around it, but this actually happened. So he backs away, and he looks at me, and he goes, Terry, you have a totally average vagina. And then he meant it like there's nothing. It's fine. Yeah, there's no problem happening.

49:21Dana Carvey:The normal word is unremarkable.

49:23Teri Hatcher:Okay, and he used average, which is better. Average is better than worse. Which is better. It's unremarkable. And I told this to Brett, and then he was like, you need to write a one-woman show. And so he kind of got that into my head that that might even be a possibility. And just going back to what you're saying about wanting to work, I'm obviously not even close to being a seasoned writer or comic or anything. But it did make me feel like if you can be good at it, if you have the discipline, it is an area where women my age can continue to tell their stories. There's great – because you have more stories.

50:00Teri Hatcher:Yeah. And, you know, maybe you don't make a ton of money, but the work of it, like to go on stage in front of 30 people and tell a story that half of them think is funny, I don't know, that could feel rewarding. So I've sort of been monkeying around in that area. also when you podcast I'm sure you finish some and you're prepping for it and you go and you do it and you walk away going you feel like you did something you go that's interesting we did it oh it kind of worked today all those things are kind of fun if you're in performer based business and we stand up

50:32Dana Carvey:you're the writer the director the performer it's you know it's just a one man band so yeah but you're like well also you're saying I wish I was better at it

50:40Teri Hatcher:I mean you would be

50:42Dana Carvey:you could do it at a very high level just based on hanging out with you, for sure. Thank you. Because our first times on stage, it takes a while to get desensitized to people staring at you and stuff. It takes a while. You seem comfortable just going up already. And you're very honest. And that's a big, big area for comedy. To just be... Saying things that people don't say. Regularly say, yeah. I just make funny voices, and he complains and talks about dating. I don't know. I don't know if that's my whole career. It kind of is.

51:15Teri Hatcher:It pretty much is.

51:16Dana Carvey:I'm kidding. It's more squirming. Thy ticket, Lady Jennifer of Coolidge. Well, many thanks, good sir. Heareth my Discover card. They accept Discover at Renaissance Fairs? Yeah, they do here. Discover is accepted at the places I love to shop. Getteth with the times. With the times? You're playing the lute. Yeah, and it sounds pretty good, right? Discover is accepted at 99 % of places that take credit cards nationwide. Based on the February 2025 Nielsen Report.

51:51Teri Hatcher:Real skin results start with one daily ritual. Meet Daily Microfolian from Dermalogica. This iconic exfoliating powder activates with water to gently polish away dullness and uneven texture. It leaves skin instantly smoother and more luminous while supporting your skin barrier. Formulated with professional expertise to deliver visible results daily. even on sensitive skin. Discover your healthiest skin today. Visit Dermalogica.com and use code SMOOTH at checkout for an exclusive gift with your$65 purchase. Let's get to when I was on SNL when she came. Yes. And it was my last year. Okay. You don't think you knew that.

52:29Teri Hatcher:I didn't. But I only did one bit a week, Lauren, when I left. I guess Adam and Chris left. They were fired though. I didn't even know that. uh did you meet farley i did not you didn't i don't think so you never dragged him around no uh because that's why i was there without those guys but lauren goes why don't you stay and do like a weekend update just your own segment but do whatever you want i was like oh great so when when terry hosted uh you came on there and we did a bit yeah right it was super fun like spade in America? Yeah, that was it called. And then Dawn Pardigl goes, now we're spared in America.

53:08So she played me and I played you.

53:10Teri Hatcher:Which was really clever. You wrote that, right? Yeah, and it was pretty funny and you go, I'm... It was meta. It was super meta. You go, I'm Terry Snatcher. Yes. Yeah, you played me. She dressed like me. So, of course, that's something I would say, an idea. Right. And we made fun of each other and I was dressed like a girl. And you hosted, and did you have a good time on that show? I did. I mean, I look back on it as just one of the highlights of opportunity and, like, with so much gratitude that I got to have that opportunity. I remember coming off of Lois and Clark. It must have been the end.

53:49Teri Hatcher:It was, like, late spring. I think I was the second to last or the third to last episode. I feel like Jim Carrey was, like, going to be after me maybe for the finale. and um i remember feeling kind of beat up on lois and clark and you know like maybe not you're getting to have the most creative input you know help superman help like it was a lot of that and um every every show the script help superman help i got it um i got i don't need the cue cards and i remember showing up and just being you know in that wednesday meeting and just sort of being like I'll do anything. Whatever anybody wants to write for me, I will do anything.

54:30Teri Hatcher:And that was my attitude, whether people appreciate it or not. I feel like I did, I got to do a cheerleader sketch with Will and Sherry. And I got to do a Molly, a Catherine Gallagher. Shut the fuck up. Yeah, no, they were all, in fact, that one, I feel like made it into like the 25, when it was the 25th anniversary. we were doing the I Feel Pretty from West Side Story it was that and she kept knocking me out of the way and I did a thing with Chris Kattan we did sort of a and I feel like there was a whoop ass that was the whoop ass time what's whoop ass Keenan I believe

55:15Dana Carvey:or Tracy Morgan when he sings or something

55:17Teri Hatcher:I don't know anyways and then I did my opening monologue with Will Ferrell. And I think Norm wrote that. Oh, how great. Yeah, and it wasn't written until Saturday morning. I kept saying, am I going to get to look at the monologue before? How fucking scary that they don't write the monologue. Oh, I remember rehearsing the monologue. And I had a, on Saturday, I had a full-on migraine. Like, you know how they start in the back? Oh, no, yeah. And so I'm standing at the mic, like rehearsing. And I had an ice pack that I was holding on the back of my head. And people would walk by and go, how are you doing?

55:50Teri Hatcher:And I'm like, oh, I'm good. I'm really good. I'm totally good. Never bad. And the monologue was a play on the Clark Kent glasses thing. So Will would come out and go with his glasses on. He'd say, you know, oh, welcome to the show. And we're so glad to have you here or whatever. And then I would kind of give him – I would look away for a second, give him a chance to take the glasses off. And then I would look back and I would be like, oh, my God, where's Will? What happened to Will? Like, Will is just here. Now he's not here. and then you would put them back on and it kind of went back and forth like that.

56:23Teri Hatcher:It was funny. It's hard to think of monologues for everybody. I mean, that's a good one for you, so it's good. But you were known as a lovely host and nice to everyone. Oh, really? Yeah, of course. Oh, that's nice. Of course. That's nice. It's in the book. It's because it's crazy. I mean, that's like the behind the scenes of the people changing your wardrobe and your wigs and you're ripping your clothes off and putting new clothes on and shoving you out. And oh, I know what I did with, oh my God. Why is his name? Tim. Tim. Tim Meadows. Yes. Oh, who I love. We did a pre-tape thing where he swore, like, you cannot believe.

57:01Teri Hatcher:Like, and I was this, it was supposed to be our sitcom. Like, homeboy and the something. And so we pre-taped this thing where he would buy, like, you know, suck my whatever, you know, whatever. And then they would bleep that out. Like, fuck you and whatever. But they would bleep everything out. Yeah, beep, beep, beep, beep. And my character would just be like, Mom, I can't believe he's talking to me like that or whatever. It was all cute. And he would say, you know what, bitch? You know, whatever. And I remember, I think at the end I had to say a nasty word to him. And I really had a hard time.

57:38Teri Hatcher:Somehow we connected on Instagram not that long ago. And he was reminding me that I had a hard time saying a nasty word. Oh, my. I'm going to see Tim next week. I want to have some. Oh, you are? Yeah. I'm going to bring him. Yeah, how funny. But that was a pre-tape, which is another fun one to be in. Yeah. They beat you up there, too. It's worse now. It's like Monday before your meeting, you do a pre-tape all day. And then you go to the meeting. Okay. You don't even read it ahead. You're like, you already said yes to this. Just go. Just go. Okay. But it is, people that come in, like everyone knows, you're excited to do something different.

58:08Then it's like, oh, this is so much. Yeah.

58:11Teri Hatcher:But I remember it. Taking it all in, doing all the things. You were a good sport. You did everything. That's a deathbed thing. like I often will look at life from the point of view like I'll look at something that's happening and I'll think like okay on my deathbed am I going to be like I'm glad I did this or you know that wasn't that important and it's definitely I mean it is definitely a thing that on my deathbed I get to go and I had that experience where I hosted Saturday Night Live once oh my god there you go I was famous and I got on Saturday it's like it just proves that you're doing well and you're like nice to be asked careers as long as you know it's like three decades at least it just feels like a different person it feels like like i also originated the national tour off of broadway of cabaret playing sally bowls after natasha richardson i think and i did seven months um la chicago boston and dc and that was a huge show and you know hugely successful and a lot of energy and that was in 1999, 2000 and I do, I look at that and I go, I don't even know who that was.

59:21Teri Hatcher:It's so different now. It's so weird.

59:24Dana Carvey:You should just talk about this thing called Desert Housewives as far as your career. No, we will. We're almost done. It's a rocket ship. Like that is still you know, and also just the name of it is so great name.

59:37Teri Hatcher:Well, you know, I looked into this when we started doing the podcast. I was like, what is the history of the word housewives because obviously after our show became the real housewives and you know and then like even the hunting wives and i mean they just like you know mark cherry should have a percentage of all of that but he doesn't but he should you know because back in the 70s so the in the 50s housewife was like a real you know prim proper the dinner on the table the whole thing and then in the 70s with the bra burning and all that right it kind of people didn't use that term anymore. And it really was Mark that brought it back with this.

1:00:12Teri Hatcher:And it was huge. That word.

1:00:15Dana Carvey:It's just catchy.

1:00:16Teri Hatcher:Yeah, it's catchy. Desperate Housewives. and they're housewives. Was a show a hit from the go. It really was. I mean, not because we knew it would be or anything. I always feel like that thing is just a monster of its own. I always give a lot of credit to that it aired on Sunday nights at 9 o 'clock, which I always felt like was the exact hour when women had gotten their kids to bed but they didn't have to go to bed themselves. And it was before Monday where everything was going to start again. It was this like one hour in the week where they could be like, this is mine. Give me my glass of wine.

1:00:55Teri Hatcher:I'm watching this show. And I feel like if they'd put it on Thursday or Tuesday, I don't know, maybe it wouldn't have happened. Was Dallas on that? When was Dallas? I think Dallas was before.

1:01:04Dana Carvey:No, but Sunday night. Oh, I don't know. Yeah. I don't know. But I do think a lot of live streaming shows, you know, their new episodes come out on Sunday. Probably for the same reason. Should we talk about your podcast for a sec? Okay. Based on what we're just talking about. Okay. Well, I didn't know. Has anyone done it where they're actually watching the episodes with like the episode is being watched and you're talking over it?

1:01:29Teri Hatcher:Well, no, we're not doing that because we don't have the rights to the show. That's why we don't show sketches. That's why you can't do it. I would have shown me and you. Oh, okay. Yeah, that's why you can't do it. But what we are doing and what's fun is that the three of us individually in our own lives, we find time in the week to watch it. We're all very studious, so we all come in with our pages of notes. Do you go episode by episode? We do. We go episode by episode. So one podcast is one full episode. I see. Okay. And then we don't share with each other our thoughts until we get to the room.

1:02:03Teri Hatcher:And so we try to take you through the episode from the beginning to the end. But then, like I said, we also use it as a jumping off point to talk about one time in your life when somebody rejected you or when this happened or when somebody broke up with you or whatever. Whatever comes up.

1:02:23Dana Carvey:The office ladies, obviously, was one that did it or are still doing it.

1:02:27Teri Hatcher:Oh, for the office. Yeah.

1:02:29Dana Carvey:Yeah. Yeah. Kind of episodically going over and over. So how many episodes are there after Desert House?

1:02:34Teri Hatcher:Well, there's eight seasons. Oh, geez. So, I mean, if the podcast works, we can – Grind them out. That's like probably 100 plus. Are there obviously some – I'm sorry to interrupt you, but we promised we would. Do you – some you really remember and some you don't really remember? I would say mostly I don't remember anything until – Until I'm – I don't remember anything. I mean, really. Being in LA, I don't remember anything. I don't remember anything. until I watch it. And then, of course, I go, oh, yeah, okay. Well, now I remember that now. And then sometimes I have more vivid memories about the actual filming of it or not.

1:03:11Teri Hatcher:But it is also interesting, and I said this at the time when it came out, because it had this four to five lead characters, a lot of the show I'm not in. You know, all of the scenes that happen between those different marital families I didn't see Bea filmed and I wasn't there so I'm kind of enjoying it and you're not watching it every week yeah and so now I'm enjoying it like a viewer that is interesting you don't know more than half of the show yeah and so I find myself a lot going oh my god can you believe how great she was in that scene like literally the best comic timing ever you know I find myself doing that a lot who were you closest with or are you still close with anyone there not really I mean I was honestly I was more of like a crew person I mean a lot of the camera crew and we would go camping together like all of our families like we would go up to Big Sur and go camping together I mean and I would have people to my house and stuff I'm I'm I was also the only single mom at the time and and I was also divorced so I was sharing custody so there were pretty strict custodial hours to when I had my daughter and, and then I was working a lot.

1:04:32Teri Hatcher:And, and so I kind of wasn't particularly social because it was like, if I had the night off, I was going to be with my kid. And, and I, I, that never got talked about. And I think people don't, you don't hear a lot of people talk about what is hard about being a parent with 50 % custody and, and the kind of stress that is or pressure or whatever. And so that was also going on for me at the time. But Vanessa Williams, I guess, is a good friend of mine. And we still keep in touch. And the lead gaffer, apparently.

1:05:07Dana Carvey:Lead gaffer.

1:05:09Teri Hatcher:I mean, there's definitely people that I keep in touch with, just not everyone. And you live in the valley. I think you used to live in the valley. I still live in the same house. It's not the same house. Is there a van in the front yard? There is a van and I still have my van. I put solar panels on my 1978 VW bus camper, which I still love to drive around. Did you buy that new 78? I was the second owner. So I've owned it for 25 years and I was the second owner. Okay. Does it run? Yeah, I get it tuned up all the time. I also have a 1974 Ford Explorer truck. Like I'm a hick. I'm a nerd and a hick.

1:05:43Teri Hatcher:These are things people don't know about me. A hick when I see you.

1:05:46Dana Carvey:What would be the fanciest thing you own? I mean like a watch or do you have anything David has 29 watches okay no I have two watches this is made of solid gold it's no big deal it costs a million dollars

1:05:56Teri Hatcher:okay does it make you feel good about yourself he gets kidnapped a lot but I always I always pay the ransom it's a swatch Terry I have a few okay I'm really not that fancy I have a diamond panther Cartier ring that I guess is pretty fancy that I bought for myself for my 40th birthday okay my daughter actually which I I have used once it sits in my closet my daughter bought me probably for my 50th birthday she got together with grandma and she bought me an Hermes Birken bag which I which I don't even use because I'm not that person but it was my daughter writes great birthday cards and she wrote a card about she basically was just saying that, you know, from her perception, I've never put myself first.

1:06:50Teri Hatcher:Like, I would never take that money and spend it on myself. Right, right. I would spend it on you guys before I would spend it on myself. Like, I just don't do that. I spend a lot of money on other people. And, I mean, and so anyway, she just felt like it was time that I had one. And, I mean, the thing that touched me the most about it was her gesture to go do that as a surprise. Right. But, like, I've used it once. I feel weird using it. It's true, but it's nice to have someone go out of their way to get you a big expensive gift. Like, you deserve this. It's nice. Yeah, that's what that's. Whether you used it or not.

1:07:22Teri Hatcher:Yeah, yeah. It does feel weird. But I like to take trips, you know. I like to spend my money on. I took all of my girlfriends. I got really great seats to see Pink at Dodger Stadium last year. And, I mean, that cost a lot. And we got a bus and we all went together. And that's a deathbed thing. I will not be sorry. I spent that money. But that's worth it. Those things are worth it. Yeah, totally. Go to a concert, sit up front. Yeah. Pay the money. If you have some money, yeah. Yeah. I agree. I'm with you. I do that a lot. Yeah.

1:07:49Dana Carvey:Yeah. All right. So the podcast is... Wait. No, that's it. That's it. Not one more question. No, go ahead. Do you have any statements? Anything you'd like to... No, I think...

1:08:00Teri Hatcher:Did I finish my thought on the thing, though? I think I did. I said that we were these three different women that we were all... That's what I find the most fun, like the way you guys are. Right. The most fun about our podcast is that, yes, we are re-watching Desperate Housewives, but we're using it as the springboard to be like a community of women talking about life. And hopefully, I hope people will like our chemistry and want to hang out with us.

1:08:24Dana Carvey:That's really what this whole thing is about. And when I was listening to you three, you were just chatting about all kinds of stuff before you got into the episode. So that just comes through. I think that's important because you settle in. Yes. And you talk. You haven't seen each other overnight. You go, hey, what happened? If anything fun happens, Dana and I do that sometimes at the beginning. And we just talk about our stupid weekend. But it kind of makes you relatable, and then you get into it. It is sort of just them listening along like they're sitting in the room with you. So I expect good things from that.

1:08:53I hope so. Yeah, it's great to see you. Thank you guys for helping me promote it.

1:08:56Dana Carvey:We're going to look at the charts, and if you go ahead of us, we will.

1:08:59Teri Hatcher:I seriously doubt that. I seriously doubt that. Oh, we'll be so mad. But I hope you help us pick up a few viewers. Everyone. I hope I get brave enough to do some stand-up. Oh, I hope you do too. Maybe you can come just tell me I'm bad. I don't even have to be. I don't look at it as magic.

1:09:17Dana Carvey:I mean, maybe there's levels of people that are so high. But as far as just being a really good stand-up, you can learn. You already have all the knack. You get better. And you've got the whole vibe that's funny. So it's only matter. And you don't seem like you're scared up there. And that's where people get so scared. Right. And it takes years. You're past that. So now it's just picking stories. And then you tape it, see what kind of work. You listen back, which is excruciating. and then you go okay well that I don't even need this part okay tighten that up and then you try it again and then that's like a fun puzzle in itself is you're trying to figure out crack the code of what what's the funny part and women of a certain age is a great area I can't remember the name her last name is Morgan I think but she Leanne Leanne she's great that's so amazing

1:10:00Teri Hatcher:she's so inspiring yes she's super sweetheart so there you go there's a huge audience I'll definitely come see you do stand up alright see you Tommy thank you guys it's so good to see you We didn't even get to talk about George Bush. Damn it. Nah, go ahead, Tara. I love it.

1:10:21Hey, guys, if you're loving this podcast, which you are, be sure to click follow on your favorite podcast app, give us a review, five-star rating, and maybe even share an episode that you've loved with a friend. If you're watching this episode on YouTube, please subscribe.

1:10:35Dana Carvey:We're on video now. Fly on the Wall is presented by Odyssey, an executive produced by Danny Carvey and David Spade, Heather Santoro and Greg Holtzman, Maddie Sprung-Kaiser and Leah Reese Dennis of Odyssey. Our senior producer is Greg Holtzman, and the show is produced and edited by Phil Sweetech. Booking by Cultivated Entertainment. him. Special thanks to Patrick Fogarty, Evan Cox, Maura Curran, Melissa Wester, Hillary Schuff, Eric Donnelly, Colin Gaynor, Sean Cherry, Kirk Courtney, and Lauren Vieira. Reach out with us. Any questions to be asked and answered on the show, you can email us at flyonthewall at odyssey.com.

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