England's Florida scoreboard XI, niche FIFA metrics & watching the World Cup in 4D

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0:30I'm sorry, you can sit there and look and play with all your silly machines as much as you like. Is Gascoigne going to have a crack? He is, you know. Oh, he fell! Brilliant! For G! He's round the goalkeeper, he's done it! Absolutely incredible! He launched himself six feet into the crowd and Kung Fu kicked a supporter who was eye-whip without a shadow of a doubt giving him lip. Oh, I say! It's amazing! He does it time and time and time again. Crank up the music! Charge a glass! This nation is going to dance all night! Imagining the football existences of the incorrectly named England stars of the Miami Stadium scoreboard, our home broadcaster co-commentators warm up nicely for the World Cup.

1:24The greatest PDF in World Cup history. the very specific metrics captured by FIFA's power rankings, footballers' names in scathing reviews of musicals, Real Madrid's presidential election, a.k.a. football news for children, and Richard Keyes' mid-2010s car unveilings. Brought to your ears by Goalhanger Podcasts, this is Football Clichés.

1:50Hello everyone and welcome to Football Clichés. I'm Adam Hurry, this is the Adjudication Panel. Joining me first of all is Nick Miller, winning his 108th cliches cap. You know who that makes you, don't you? No. Who does it make me? Bobby Moore. Kleptomaniac of Columbia, Bobby Moore. I went to Columbia recently and didn't steal a thing, so that's one of the many reasons why Bobby and I are different. Lessons learned. Alongside you for this one, making his 34th cliches appearance, making him Michael Carrick, Jack Wilshire, Adam Lallana, Luke Shaw and Trent Alexander-Arnold, it's James Moore. How are you doing?

2:26Hello, Adam. Welcome to Clichés. I think we can safely call this the first adjudication panel of the World Cup. Can't we, Nick? The World Cup has essentially started in a content sense. I think so. It's a kind of soft opening of the World Cup, given that there is now nothing else happening other than the old kind of preliminary friendlies. So all our eyes have definitely turned to the World Cup by now. Yeah, James, we're the Diana Ross penalty of the Clichés. content rhythm i think today um getting everybody in the mood but not ignoring the wider world as well culturally kind of central but not actually massively relevant exactly exactly a big shout out next to the seven people who immediately got the listeners nord vpn quiz question correct from last week the question was i've scored against england at a world cup but was also involved in a controversial incident at the same tournament i played club football on four different continents and won league titles on three of them.

3:23I scored over 400 goals and finally retired at the age of 43 after getting on the score sheet alongside my son for my 14th and final club. James, do you know the answer? No, I don't. It feels like it should be obvious from those clues, but I don't know who that is. Nick? Yes, I think I do know the answer. Rivaldo, I think. It was Rivaldo. So, yeah, congrats to the twin betweeners, Samrat Dutta, Andy Pompey, George Greenhowell, Joachim Stav, the other listener, Michael Cox, and George Baker for getting that one. I'll never tire of writing those. Quite good fun. The quiz was good fun as well. What a little World Cup teaser that was.

3:59Right. Adjudication panel time. James, my World Cup fever status. I half watched Morocco 1, Norway 1 on ITVX with no commentary and for a bit, no score caption either. You're in pretty deep for like a week out. I kind of primed myself to watch England on a Saturday night. I kind of basically almost built my day around that, which is kind of pathetic when you think about it. And then nine o 'clock rolled around and I just carried on watching murder documentaries on Netflix instead. I didn't even watch it. Oh, wow. I'm kind of off the scale the other way. Bloody hell, that's a blow. That's a blow for everyone concerned.

4:35Nick, did you lay eyes on England at least? I didn't know. Fortunately, I was out. Thanks for listening, everyone. Dave, Charlie, you're out. My World Cup fever sort of status This is partly tempered by the fact that it's mostly admin-based because I am flying to America at the end of this week. So it's taken the edge off it slightly. Yeah, fair enough. Okay, well, on to England's penultimate World Cup warm-up game against New Zealand in the 32-degree heat at the Raymond James Stadium in Miami. If you think of all those details in totality, James, never has a game promised so little on paper, has it?

5:16That's exactly what you want, though, for a World Cup war, isn't it? You want the kind of iffy conditions and kind of sub-optimal setting. I think that's absolutely perfect. That's the best possible preparation. And against a team who are just going to sit in and defend as well. It's ideal. Yeah, yeah. I mean, so footballistically insignificant was this game, Nick, both before and afterwards, really. One of the most emerging stories of the game was the Raymond James Stadium scoreboard getting all the names of the England players wrong, except for Jordan Pickford in goal, which I thought was good to get that one right.

5:48But can we just run through the rest of the names and decide how and where they would play their football in their careers? Number five, John Consa. John Consa does feel quite, it does feel centre-back-y, but like a place for crew or someone, like a lower league journeyman kind of centre-back. But still gets in a World Cup squad at some point at the age of 29. had a good season with Bolton in like 2002 or something yeah number six James Mark O 'Reilly could be anybody really that's very league one I mean that feels like another one who would maybe get like a kind of rogue call up to like a Northern Ireland squad when they qualify or whatever yeah yeah we'll take the one thing that really strikes me about that name is obviously Nico O 'Reilly I think this is probably well covered ground but it's quite an awkward name to say because of the kind of the double o so if nothing else this has removed that yeah that's good news a couple of first name only situations nick number nine harry and number 16 cobi sound very much like brazilian wonder kids who who get signed really early on by a european sort of bantamweight club but then there's just fade to complete obscurity and ending up in russia yeah the career path on wikipedia is just uh like five loans to a different brazilian clubs back from Villarreal or somewhere.

7:11Outside chance, James, that one of them, if not both, end up as a naturalised citizen of Qatar and play for them at the World Cup. Yeah. I also think the spelling of these is probably wrong as well because Cobby is not going to be spelled K-E-O-B-B-I-E. There'll be a Y in there somewhere. They always change the spelling slightly. Yeah, like Man City, forgotten youngster, Cakey. Right, exactly. Absolutely absurd. Number 11, Marcus Stones, Nick, who sounds like a really high-powered QC. That says to me, like, young defender coming through a big club but doesn't quite make it. Right. So, you know, a sort of solid enough right-back for Liverpool who played like 20 times.

7:55It's a good name. It's a good solid footballing name. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Mostly in the League Cup, obviously. Oh, yeah, absolutely, yes. Number 14, James Jordan Gay. That's just his younger brother, isn't it? who is even better no i think it's the younger brother who plays in non-league right i think every other player in non-league is a jordan so i could see that i could see that yeah he plays for at least maybe slit cray wanderers or whatever or he's his agent yeah that's true incredibly qualified to be his agent number 17 nick morgan anderson i thought this was this feels scandy to me this feels like this kind of swedish midfielder okay but with an english mother possibly yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah and and like amazes everyone where he's when he speaks in swedish in an interview or something like it number 19 james ollie kane um which unsurprisingly given the portmanteau here is actually quite a strikery name but admittedly only for wrexham that's true i mean i actually think marcus steins morgan anderson and ollie kane do all sound like cricketers to me.

9:01Olly Kane's really crickety, isn't he? You could sneak those names in and I wouldn't have a clue. What kind of role in the England cricket team does Olly Kane play, Nick? Olly Kane's a kind of tall, very fast bowler whose career is kind of crippled by back problems. It's so injury prone. Number 25, James, Jed Bellingham, who I think is a character in EastEnders. He owns the E20. dresses in a suit at all times and he doesn't drink pints, he drinks bottled beer in the Vic. Yeah, unnamed bottled beer every time. I'm sure he's a bit of a character, this guy. I don't see him as being a successful sportsman, that's for sure.

9:44He's one of those people, you know those people who never, they always carry their phones in their hand. They never seem to put their phone in their pocket. Because I think it's designed to say, well, someone could be calling me at any second, so i've got to keep it keep it very uh you know easy access at all times nice uh and finally number 26 jerell rashford member of a really failed boy band that was was was born from a reality tv show yeah yeah he's he's the kind of and then he's the one who inexplicably becomes popular but becomes famous years later for reasons that you can't quite put your finger on okay that was good fun i enjoyed that i'm glad we got we rinsed that story for all it was worth one of the alleged highlights of this game james was the second half performance of rio ungomoa again it's one of those cameos that really wasn't quite as impressive as people are sort of you know retrospectively made out but it was enough to trigger something of a clamor but i don't think it's the strongest clamor in england's major tournament history given that he's basically have to fly home first before the clamor could even begin and i don't see what form this clamor could take because he's not in the squad unless someone gets injured in the next six days or so he's not going to be in the squad um i don't think any clamor could really gather any pace is it not possible there's a clamor for someone to get injured and then him to come in that's not actually far from that nick i can kind of see given the inclusion of people like jordan henderson um you could sort of see that be a bit cruel though because we're not allowed to wish injury on on players that's one of the big no-nos of football there there is enough skepticism about something like you know if noni maduake got injured then people would be there was quite a lot of why is he in the squad so there would be plenty of that in 2026 james do we need a wild card are we past that do we need wild cards it's 26 man squads i suppose that if anything there is more space for wild cards you should be taking four wild cards if anything yeah um more yeah i i know i think i think it definitely is for that reason and i mean i i he is he is kind of almost like perfectly designed for that role as well right he's he's played relatively little football but enough you'd come be fairly confident he wouldn't be overawed he must have played some Champions League football right this season I think so that you'd think kind of stands him in relatively good stead for playing against international opposition and he's the kind of player you know he beats players I think that's the numbers in the Premier League this season were very favorable so he's kind of almost like the perfect player for that really maybe he's is he just a year out is he's unfortunate that he's he's kind of had his breakthrough in the world cup season and not the season before because he's kind of on that trajectory whereby like it feels like in a year's time it'll be really obvious yeah possibly but i feel like that doesn't necessarily harm the clamour because there's there's a recency to it like bursting onto the scene that if anything that feeds the clamour but uh his performance against new zealand in the second half nick was described as fearless which was inevitable for a dribbler a young dribbler in the england team but what was there to fear in this situation you're playing against liberato casaccia well it's kind of freezing to that thing that people say quite a lot i think i can't remember which world cup or which tournament would apply to most but there's like when it's a new broadly new bunch of players who haven't been to a tournament before they say well because they haven't got the fear of failure they don't carry the weight you get you get used to get the story to bring cricket back into this as well but you would get you'll get this when a new-ish group of players will go to australia so they're not they're not of course they're not scarred by uh by previous defeats so this is kind of the the ultimate version of that i suppose do they not read the long reads about it for god's sake they're completely immune from it also england have been good in the last few tournaments they surely should just be maxing out on those players like to get lingard back in not all bad news from kaboa he won't fly home empty-handed james because he goes home with the enviable record in my eyes of wearing the highest squad number ever by an England player 31 is that right when when you think about it that does make sense that it would be the record so he was the 31st player in it because they had five extra players or four wasn't it four extra players I don't know why he's wearing 31 to be honest he smashed the record Nick held by Martin Peters, who wore 28 against Ecuador, I believe, in 1970 in a game where Gordon Banks wore number 3.

14:10What the fuck? Hang on a minute. This was a pre-tournament friendly, presumably, wasn't it? Yeah, exactly. Before the 1970 World Cup. Yeah, they basically wore their training numbers, apparently. Whatever that means. Wow. Yeah. Don't like that at all. Don't like Gordon Banks in 3. It's horrible. But the real highlight of this game was Sam Matavace and Lee Dixon re-establishing their ITV chemistry just days before the tournament begins. The New Zealand national football team known as the All Whites, a nod to the All Blacks who don the famous Rugby Union shirt. The women's team is the White Ferns.

14:47The rest of the New Zealand teams follow a similar sort of name in custom, hockey, the Black Sticks. But when I was looking at this yesterday, the best one for me was the basketball one. the tall blacks yeah yeah good like that I can think of another couple could you? yeah we'll leave it there

15:32all black jersey is very very famous almost sacred in new zealand i think that's why the rest of the sporting teams want to take it on in some guys so they should bloody hell i mean you get the co-commentary a game deserves i guess james but that's that's some serious rustiness there i don't want to speculate on what lee dixon had in mind let's not let's not get into that i mean that is pretty incredible stuff yeah no idea just 22 seconds of silence there nick nowhere close to being any sort of record but uncomfortable enough i would say and sort of helped by the the crowd noise which is exactly the sort of crowd noise i i want from a pre-tournament friendly in the country that the the the world cup is being held yeah i want to make out individual england fan voices at these games yeah yeah exactly right perfectly pitched elsewhere scotland have warmed up for this world cup james with um with four goal thrashings of both curacao and bolivia the bolivia win in particular was was described as a statement win are you having that are you having a statement win i don't know what the altitude was yeah that's true 207 teams in this world cup and if you're not in it you're no good surely so they've beaten a team who aren't at the world cup i mean there's nothing really to write home about in the first of those warm-up games nick scotland beat curacao 4-1 at Hampden Park.

16:5210-man Curacao as well, which what a great, what a great combination of words that is that we're talking about. Again, it appears that the Scottish commentary pairings are a little rusty as well. So all change. And the question is, can Scotland go on and win this match now, James?

17:12I'll tell you when I finish my file, Liam. I was going to, I was going to just let you off there, but you've admitted yourself. Dreadful timing as usual. I thought you saw me eating it there, but yeah, look. Samuel Campbell said this in Nick. He says, James McFadden couldn't answer a question because he was eating at the start of the second half. Is it unreasonable for me to expect him to have had his food when he's off air? Yes. I think it's perfectly reasonable to expect that from our commentators. In a job where the only thing you have to do is talk, it feels like you shouldn't be eating. There's standards to uphold here, isn't there, James?

17:46This is the BBC, for God's sake, James. you're off to the world cup as part of their team you've got to fuck yourself up i'm just kind of struggling to imagine the scenario in which this has come up like uh you know they must bring the food up to them in the gantry or whatever at half time like they're not going down the ladder or whatever they go and get it assume so like i i'm always wondering whether this is a secondary pie situation whether there's like a pie left over and he's thought oh actually you know what i might have the second pie and it's not going to come to me in the first like 90 seconds of the game i can wolf this the first 90 seconds of the second half sorry i can wolf this quickly now and no one will know and the commentator's gone to him straight away and he's knackered there's there's an implication here that this isn't the first time he's done this because the commentator must have known that he was or he must have been vaguely aware that he was eating so is there a sense that the commentator has deliberately thrown to him while he's eating to just to kind of go look you've done this before i'm going to embarrass you on on tv so don't do it again don't pull any of this shit when i'm out of the world cup yeah exactly yeah getting it out of his system yeah there was definitely a hint of that i mean it opens so many cans of worms it reminds me james of the um of the of the sort of story that the half times in scotland are shorter or something yeah something about that scotland scottish half times are like 10 minutes or something which is why they always come back quick earlier on the viddy printer or something like that so maybe James McFadden got caught out by the short Scottish half-time, which I can't believe.

19:18James McFadden, of all people, should be well-versed in that. Being Scottish. And played in Scotland loads, yeah. I thought he had a really good story about it, but no. No, sorry, no. He is Scottish. Other technicalities around kick-offs to get to grips with for this World Cup, Nick. FIFA have announced that before each game, the entire matchday squad will line up around the centre circle before the national anthems are played. in a bit like if there's going to be a minute's silence for someone who's died. Now, there was an immediate backlash to this. A lot of people saying, you're messing with tradition, such as it is.

19:50FIFA's rationale for this was that everyone in the stadium could have a 360-degree view of events. And now I think about it, yeah, that kind of makes sense. Normally, they line up facing a big stand. And so the other three sides of the ground are like, well, can't see you, this is rubbish. Maybe this is a more aesthetically pleasing way of doing things. These are sort of things that bring out the kind of very, very small amount of games gone in me. It's just more faff. Why do we need more faff? What else is this achieving other than creating more faff? It's allegedly also to represent unity and things like that.

20:22But do we need the subs, James? Do we need the subs there? I think if you're going to do this anywhere, the World Cup is the place, right? That's almost a kind of acceptable face of faff. The pageantry and the nonsense and the music, the FIFA anthem, which is obviously the best bit of music ever written, as we all know. I think that's kind of fine in the World Cup but if it's if it kind of is then you know trickling down into the Champions League and we're getting it in Champions League group stage match day four between Paphos and Carrot whatever they're called that's probably going to be a bit much and then obviously it ends up in the Premier League and the Football League and whatever and it's just you know it loses all meaning but I kind of feel like in the World Cup you can amp up the World Cup I kind of think that's all right.

21:02I mean there were fears Nick that the players are going to be individually announced by the pa announcer as they came out um which which really would have slowed down the group stage i sense i think we would have lost our minds a little bit by by late june so hang on but both squads are all going to be around the center circle yeah is there going to be enough room i mean this this could be a lead to some kind of awkward jostling situation i've got no graphical sort of guide in front of me nick but if you think of a classic minute silence where they're all sort of arms around each other just the starting 11 they normally only take up about a third of their own portion of the center circle so you can probably fit three starting lineups on each half so you can get six in at 66 players that's more than enough with a 26 man squad so i think it'll be okay space to breathe as well might have to do a bit of scooching you know if you're not willing to do a bit of scooching at a world cup in a way there that's true are we having the whole officiating team uh in there yeah where do they go exactly because everyone's going to want to see them in 360 degrees as well.

22:02FIFA's bureaucracy doesn't stop there, James. They've released the greatest PDF of all time, which is confirmation of all the colour combinations for all the group stage games, just so we know in advance what colour everybody's going to be wearing. But it doesn't just stop there. It tells you what the referee's going to be wearing, what the ball kids are going to be wearing. That's useful to know. Good to know there's no clashes there. And what colour the substitute bibs are going to be. What a PDF! That's right up your street there, isn't it? I'd seen the kits the two teams are wearing, and I had noticed there are too many teams wearing white in this tournament.

22:37And I say this as a proud Englishman. Right. But just from kind of glancing at that document, you can see it's like, I guess, white has kind of become the kind of default away kit colour, maybe. Isn't there some kind of legislation over having multiple colours in your kits? I think people have kind of reverted just to having white. but it does seem like more or less every game has a team with a white kit i just wonder whether that it's not really wild copy a white kit to me south africa have drawn the short straw in the opening game nick because they have they will be their substitutes will be donning the unlucky maroon bibs i'm afraid so they're doomed i was sent this uh pdf on friday when uh i should definitely been busy doing other things and it swallowed an hour of my time glory that's great i just love the completism of it all but uh fifa aren't just stopping there james powered by saudi giants aramco uh they're going to be running the fifa power rankings during the during the tournament which is going to be individually ranking players on various individual contributions during a game and presumably the teams as well um my first thought james was other companies are already doing this just just get who scored in i don't care because they'd be rating the players out of 10 as well like who scored do this already their website is a little bit tin pot but it is still quite usable just do that yeah people still use it uh my first thought is there is it not very similar to the capello index the infamous capello index of 2010 that was basically the gist of that whole thing right yeah kind of writing players and boiling it down to one number i'm sorry barbara it's the Capello Index.

24:13I'm really sorry. To accompany the unveiling of this, Nick, was a glossy video featuring Rashmin Chowdhury, Rio Ferdinand and Arsene Wenger acting out some roles as they discover the extent that FIFA are rolling out the power rankings. And amidst all this, Wenger was reassuring them that they are going to be tracking every single thing that a player does. And there's a video of Julian Alvarez playing for Argentina with his arm up as he runs, like asking for a pass. and they're going to track what they have declared as offers to receive. Please be true. I really hope it isn't just some sort of joke in the video, but we used to call that calling for the ball.

24:53Offers to receive is sensational. That reads like kind of legalese in some kind of contract that you are obliged to read, like a mortgage agreement or something. Who is going to be topping this particular ranking if it is indeed real, James? Who's going to be topping the offer? Jordan Henderson's a good pointer, but does that count as offering to receive? I don't think so. It feels like it's going to be the centre forward in a team who kind of have a lot of the ball, a lot of possession, kind of overplay and don't ever give the ball to the centre forward. I'm not sure who that would be in this tournament.

25:23But you know what I mean? There'll be someone who'll kind of plaintively be kind of constantly with their arm up, waiting for the ball and never getting it. I want to know who's going to finish top of that ranking, Nick, to be honest. I don't want to be too obvious here, but surely it's Ronaldo who kind of, that followed by the kind of flappy arm thing as his teammate chooses a much more sensible pass. but he kind of rages at the misfortune that he has to share a space with these lowly slugs who refuse to pass the ball to him at every possible opportunity. I'm not saying that these rankings won't be objected, but I suspect the Saudi-backed Aramco power rankings might be quite kind to Ronaldo in that respect.

25:57Anyway, meanwhile, over to New York we go. That man Zoran Mamdani is at it again as he addresses his citizens ahead of the World Cup. Throughout the World Cup, I will be sure to provide New Yorkers with constant communication Before every match, we will share updates with New Yorkers on the news, on social media, and wherever else they get their information. I will close with this. Mario Balotelli, one of the greatest strikers in recent memory, once said about his muted goal celebrations. When I score, I don't celebrate because I'm only doing my job. When a postman delivers letters, does he celebrate?

26:31When New York City puts on a World Cup that is organized, that is safe, that runs smoothly and easily, will we celebrate? No, because we are only doing our job. A reasonable reference there, Nick. I don't mind it. It came out of nowhere, I'll be honest. The blank faces on everyone around him, not even kind of even pretending to react or not even a sort of like a token little laugh at the kind of offbeat reference. A sign that he may have flogged this horse a little bit. Yeah, do you think he's gone too early with this stuff, James? He's got five, six weeks to fill. I don't know how visible and how prominent he'll be during the World Cup, but he's got some more references.

27:10Maybe he needs some more international football references. Maybe he's gone a bit prem recently, isn't he? Yeah, he's a bit, yeah. Is he too Barclays coded? Does he need to kind of broaden out into the World Cup of yore? My real thought on that quote, have you checked that it's a real quote? Yeah, yeah. I'm not sure of the exact provenance. It either sounds like something you'd see on some lame Instagram account or whatever. I've heard of it before, but I'm not sure. But yeah, we'll be keeping eyes on Mamdani and our ears as well. That's it for part one. We'll be back very shortly with more adjudication panel.

27:58This is the World Cup adjudication panel. We have decided the first of the tournament. a reminder that you can sign up for dreamland where you'll find the first part of our world cup double header out now and the second installment is dropping this week you can sign up at dreamland dot football cliches dot com for 5.99 a month you'll get ad-free listening of all of our episodes plus two episodes a month of dreamland uh access to the premium section of the happy hunting grounds quiz and all sorts of other things as well this thursday's episode by the way is going to be the listeners, World Cup Mesut Haaland Dix.

28:33We would like to hear your specifically World Cup themed fascinations and irritations, the tiny things that stimulate you or irritate you about the greatest football competition in the world. So get in touch with those. A 30 second voice note, DM it to me, send it to footballcliches at gmail.com. Do whatever you like. As the tournament goes on, we'd love to see, love to hear your observations from the tournament as well. So get in touch with whatever you have. Right, footballers' names in things for you now, Nick and James. First one comes from Glyn Jones. He says, episode three of Apple TV's latest space race drama, Star City, is directed by none other than Stefan Schwartz, but not the one banned from Flying to Space by Sunderland.

29:15Lovely bits of symmetry there, Nick Miller. Wonderful stuff. Are we sure that this is the real, that that's the person's real name and it's not just kind of very, very niche inside joke? Could be. Either way, somebody's living out their dream. on some level so i like it um next up this came from simon miles james and we're all familiar with the reacher series of novels and their prolific use of aston villa surnames this appears to be a lesser publication it's called lethal target and it's by a guy called dan stone which is just like the name you would make up if you had to think of someone who wrote a military themed book apologies for everyone involved but anyway here are a selection of names involved in Lethal Target by Dan Stone.

30:01Fowler led seven operators across the heavy field, four of his trusted team plus the three newer bodies, Nketiah, Anderson and Nolan. He knew five of them, Barnes, McCann, Hendry, Cole and Krasinski. All excellent operators. Fowler placed his hand on Barnes' shoulder. Remember all the shit we have been through together over the years and I'll help you get out. I promise. But first, we have to put Kane in the ground. Absolute scattergun approach to this, James. I don't know who Krasinski is in a footballing sense, but the others really just be randomly selected. Is the guy who has like a stake in West Ham, not Krasinski?

30:43I think that's his name, isn't it? I mean, that seems like that's not in keeping with the rest of those names. It's not, and I can't be bothered to look it up. It would be a very, very left field shout. But I just get the sense, Nick, that if the Reacher novels have done this already, nobody else should be doing it they're laying it on a little bit too thick but I suppose you've got to get the names from somewhere right? You know how some people while they're working can watch things or have something on TV in the background or something like that it just feels like this is just a series of Premier League years episodes that have been added on in the background oh yeah Barnes that'll do, yeah excellent the shit that Barnes and Valor have been through together i.e.

31:202-4-3 wins over Newcastle where are Russian Collymore? Yeah, good names, good names, good operators. Fergus Morgan writes in next. He says, I thought you might enjoy this paragraph from the Stages review of Beetlejuice the musical. It says, nor does the show deliver on spectacle. Peter Negreini's video largely settles for storybook gnarled tree branches and cartoonish swirls. And the puppetry, designed by Michael Curry and featuring a giant sandworm and a cavorting roast pig, among others, would be substantially put to shame by most big budget pantos. some scenes are even played bargain basement style in front of a cloth and conor gallagher's choreography is dismayingly tame an amalgam of basic vaudevillian moves that never stands a chance of taking us to another dimension did not see that coming scathing i'm certainly not going to go and see beat reduce the musical now certainly not in the next six weeks i've heard some pretty pretty scathing criticism of conor gallagher in the last couple of months about i've proffered some myself uh but that is that is next level stuff i want you to try and get uh the words an amalgam of basic vaudevillian moves into the next spurs match report please could be done yes elsewhere yet another absolutely pathetic real madrid election nick like i mean this feels like a sideshow that football really doesn't need and there is something really childish about it Are you with me on this?

32:43Yeah, because the term wasn't up or anything. It was just Perez just kind of going, just flexing, really. Yes! I'm going to call an election. Don't need to. I'm going to win. And some kind of worm is going to debase himself by promising that he's going to sign Erling Haaland and he's going to get Jurgen Klopp in his manager when he doesn't know neither of them are going to happen. and he's just going to look like a tit. Yeah, I mean, James, to a certain extent, I do respect the fact that there are a few clubs out there who are member-owned and they go through this rigmarole every few years. There's only four left in Spain.

33:22I was surprised when I thought more clubs did this. So just to give you the details of this, the absolutely not made-up 37-year-old renewable energy entrepreneur Enrique Riquelme was his competitor in this race. And he said he'd hire Jurgen Klopp as manager if he got elected. having previously said he'd signed Erling Haaland to Man City's huge annoyance. He inevitably ended up losing to up-and-coming presidential talent Florentino Perez who promised to sign a mystery player he described as a total Galactico adding some tantalising details that they did not play in the Premier League and they were not a defender or a goalkeeper.