Pre-season trophies, Iran in the Championship... and what happened to shin splints?

18:29Charlie Eccleshare:of the psychological blow as it's been known dave before half time is that yeah it throws your half-time plans into disarray and you've got to regroup in a different way than you expected. In fairness to Andros Townsend, who was on co-coms for this, he opined that Chelsea scoring before the first calling break, which was 25 minutes, I think, was good because PSG were all over the shop before then. And then Luis Enrique got his troops together and properly gave them a proper tactical schooling in that calling break. So if they hadn't scored before then, the game may never have turned out that way.

19:02Charlie Eccleshare:So the logic was pretty sound. I'm all right with it. yeah yeah that does make sense that's slightly different i guess though isn't it because that's like we've got to do this before they can change something yeah which maybe you hear about at halftime but i feel it's more about the like oh that's going to make it a really difficult team talk maybe this this whole paranoia about the psychological blowers has dictated the fact that you know teams are basically stopping games all the time for a bit of a bit of a sort of cheeky wag on the touchline eddie howe is famous for it now part of the dark arts to feign an injury and then yeah there you go let's move on to something much more entertaining it's footballers names in things lovely trio for you this first one came from sam davis it's from the great house revival on bbc judith is still hands-on with every aspect of the project today she's meeting sign restorer Damien Duff.

19:58Charlie Eccleshare:Good, solid, six out of ten from all those names and things. Yep, he's just lost his job, hasn't he, at whatever club he was at. Oh, is he really? That's what he's... Imagine the scrum to interview him if he did, you know, if that was what he was doing in retirement, how everyone would be after that interview. I mean, it would be great. Just want you to stay active. Next up, Rob Gilbert writes in and says, I was in a taxi in Majorca last night and our driver had the song Raska y Gana by Kresh K playing. imagine my surprise to hear an Aston Villa hotshot mentioned.

20:30Charlie Eccleshare:What are you doing there? Wow, and that is actually, this isn't one of those where it's like, oh, I've heard a song and I think it sounds like they're saying Eddie Howe. It's always Eddie Howe. This is actually, that's a lyric. He's actually talking about Olly Watkins. so other footballers that appear in this song Charlie Adam Lallana Arno Danjuma I don't know what's going on a pair of murder sackers in there as well it's very random I've got no idea what's going on get someone to translate it for us we need more on this yeah someone get in touch with the full context that would be fantastic and it's been leading up to this though this came from mutedlab8600 on Reddit this is from all elite wrestling all in Texas some bloke called Excalibur on commentary for the clash between John Moxley and Hangman Adam Page.

21:23Charlie Eccleshare:This is Football Cliché's theme tune things in wrestling. We talked about the violence that we've seen in the Texas death matches, perhaps none more violent than Hangman and Swerve Strickland. Moxley on the floor. Fans are, without a doubt, giving him some lift. There's a sign up there.

21:52that can't be a coincidence Dave there's no chance wow do you know anything about this Excalibur fellow uh I know who he is I mean you follow him on Twitter so tell me more his thing is he's got like a he's a he's under a mask right so it's sort of a persona but he's but but acts as a sort of straight up commentator but yeah didn't have him down as a as a cliches

22:14Charlie Eccleshare:man fair play I mean not far off and it's close enough to make me think that he must be aware imagine if he'd thrown in the stutter that would be unbelievable I would have been absolutely glorious that's a lovely way to win part 1 we'll be back very shortly

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24:53Charlie Eccleshare:Welcome back to Football Clichés. This is the adjudication panel. A reminder that episode 3 of Dreamland is out right now. This is the Football Linguistic Civil War of the 2020s. Dave, Charlie and I explore the simmering tensions between newfangled football terminology and the mainstream media. We take in Dean Saunders' talk sport masterpiece of Swallowed a Laptop and sporting directors hailing the verticality of new right-backs as we look into the intergenerational football linguistic civil war. Go to dreamland.footballcliches.com to enjoy that episode and everything else. Two episodes a month of Dreamland.

25:31Charlie Eccleshare:Pre-sale access to our Football Cliches live shows, free entry to Cliches quiz live events. All of that for just£5.99 a month. Let's delve into the world of transfers now, Charlie. Here's one for you. Marcos Asensio is on the verge for a permanent move to Fenerbahce, snubbing Saudi in the process. I mean, this is textbook. Yeah, lovely. There was something about his loan to Villa, Dave, that felt like it was never going to be turned into a... It was never really going to be consummated, I didn't think. I thought it was a little bit of a shop window-y situation. Yeah, bit of a fling, really. Yeah, exactly.

26:04Rather than anything long-term.

26:05Charlie Eccleshare:I think Villa fans are all right with that as well. I think they see the bigger picture here. But I like the fact that he's snubbing Saudi to go to Turkey. That is nice. Yeah, he knows his place. But I really think that this year's summer transfers that just sound so right, XI is coming along nicely because Asensio is going to be the absolute heart of it. News breaking before we just recorded. Wolves, Charlie, are closing in on the signing of Fluminense winger John Arias. A fee of around£15 million has been agreed for the Colombia International. 28 in September never played in Europe this is real credibility for the Club World Cup as a kind of old school signing generation competition because he starred in Fluminense's run to the semi-finals of course he did I think it's going to be reverse engineered as starring but that's alright yeah this I think we probably even talked about this didn't we as to whether the Club World Cup would have that kind of old school World Cup boost for players also good to see another Colombian with John spelt in the way that Duran you know I think that was most people's first introduction to that spelling of John.

27:05Yeah. Good to see it catching up.

27:07Charlie Eccleshare:There's a real vacuum for that in the Premier League and it's been filled, which is crazy. Do you think that because it is club football, but it is still in a tournament setting, like that kind of lends itself just that little bit better to signing a player because you've seen it's the club game. It's international football. It's still a bit too much like, oh, well, he might be good for Colombia, but it's a different, the sort of international game has become too different from the club game. But no, I've seen him in there playing for his team. Exactly. And he looks good. Yeah, he's done it against organised club teams.

27:36Charlie Eccleshare:Charlie, a little quiz for you. Can you name another ex-Premier League John, spelt J-H-O-N? Oh. South Coast. I don't think... Ah, yes, the guy... Ah, fuck. Whoever gets this first is the winner forever. Oh, oh no. God. It's right there. So you're still with Collins John. It's Portsmouth, right? Yeah. Oh, Utaka? No. No, they had a bogey midfield. Uh, ah. Listeners screaming at their mobile devices. I'm not sure I'm going to get it. In my head, Duran was the first time I saw that. Signed for Potsmouth in June 2005 for 2.2 million euros, John Viafara. Yes. There you are. Don't remember him. Yeah, big on the J-H-O-Ns.

28:22Charlie Eccleshare:Here's one for you. Burnley and Wolfsburg are in talks to sign Norwich forward Josh Sargent, who Norwich value at around 20 million pounds. It's all perfect, Dave. It doesn't matter which one he goes to, it's perfect. Yeah, he's already played in Germany, which is a nice well-trodden path from the USA college system just to finding yourself at the academy of a Bundesliga club. I did check that it was that way around, that he wasn't born on a military base in Germany, which would have been a bit on the nose with the surname Sergeant. So he didn't follow that path. But yeah, also yeah. Burnley would work equally as well for him.

28:58Charlie Eccleshare:Yeah, Burnley's perfect. basically signing one of the top scorers from the championship as you go up, on your way up, just take them with you for£20 million. It really is absolutely perfect. Didn't see this one coming though. Charlie Mason-Holgate has gone to Qatari outfit Al Garafa, one of those random little free transfers. But one report I read said this, the Jamaica International will team up with former Real Madrid Steiger Hosolu in the Middle East. Not much for teaming up, not much for joining forces, that is it. Mason-Holgate and Hosolu. Can't see them linking up too often. I was going to say the fact they play completely different positions as well, just adding to the randomness of that pairing.

29:32Charlie Eccleshare:Is that the least likely telepathy you can ever imagine, Dave? How are you, mate? You're good. Start finishing each other's sentences. Oh, dear. You don't hear much about the Qatari League, do you, really? But, like, it's sort of, you know, I had a look at the team and I look at some of the teams in preparation for this. Now, yeah, there are this sort of random little sprinkling of players who Saudi, for whatever reason, are presumably aren't interested in. That is the assumption, isn't it? Yeah, I guess it's the same sort of vibe though. Probably in some respects, if you're a footballer, Qatar is a bit more appealing than Saudi.

30:06Qatar's tiny though. Saudi has a bit more about it as a place to visit.

30:13Charlie Eccleshare:Who's the shill now? Compared to Qatar. Put that on a billboard.

30:22Charlie Eccleshare:Right, next up. Didn't expect this lot to have a transfer exclusive. this window, Dave, but GB News the other night came up with the exclusives of Tottenham eyeing Adam Wharton to complete an incredible triple transfer swoop worth£175 million after deals for Morgan Gibbs-White and Mohamed Kudus. The whole idea of GB News having A, a transfer exclusive, or B, a person even remotely employed to do it, it just blows my mind. Yeah, I'd like to know who their transfer guru is. But yeah, OK, interesting. A few years ago, John Sopel was briefly a Spurs ITK. He was out for dinner. Yeah, he was out for dinner and tweeted that he saw Bill Kenwright with Daniel Levy.

31:04And it was around the time Spurs were about to sign Richarlison. So he tweeted it and then it was being picked up by all the aggregators. It was hilarious. And they didn't really know what tier to give him because, you know, all the journalists are ranked tier one, whatever, for reliability. John Sopel is a very, very well-respected journalist, but possibly not in the area of Spurs transfers. so where do you rank him?

31:25Charlie Eccleshare:What tier of GB News been stuck in automatically after this? I mean, are they bursting onto the scene in this respect? I don't know. I think they'd have been pretty low. Yeah. I hope that it's a wholesome homegrown transfer reporter for GB News as well. Yeah. Right. The game's gone, Dave. I can tell you that the game is gone. I hadn't noticed it. I don't know how recent development this is but Fabrizio Romano is selling t-shirts with his own tweets on them. Wow. Okay. One of which is the tweet about Luka Modric leaving Real Madrid after 13 legendary years. So it's just that tweet with a little cartoon of Luka Modric with all these trophies on a white T-shirt, smack bang in the middle on the front.

32:02Charlie Eccleshare:Who's wearing it? Where and why? Yeah, I mean, that is the question. Keep your eye out if you're out and about and you see somebody wearing one of these. It's also the option, I think, to... Basically, you can choose any of his tweets, right? So you can get him announcing the player... You can personalise, you can make it up. which I can sort of imagine someone doing that, you know, pretending that they're signing for the club they support. Here we go, an£100 million deal. Should we get the mate for Dave Stagdy? Yeah, exactly. Actually, I don't know. I might take it, to be honest. You could do worse.

32:37Charlie Eccleshare:Yeah, you could do worse. Love that. Yeah, just the£71 for a personalised sweatshirt with a Fabrizio Romano tweet on it. Nothing more to be said about that. Right, news of Manchester United's penny pinching continues, Charlie. Talk Sport report that they are about to abandon the traditional act of pre-season friendly gift giving. Most traditionally, the penance. They're doing away with pre-season friendly penance. But crucially, the reason they decided to do away with them is because they're playing Leeds. And they thought, well, we played each other loads. We don't have to give each other penance.

33:09Charlie Eccleshare:What an incredible bit of logic this is. It's quite funny this as well, because it's one of many things that must be quite divisive for Kesey. because on the one hand, he must think that pre-season friendly penance is ludicrous, but on the other, it's evidence of Sonny Jim's sort of evil cost cutting. So I'd love to know where his head's at with it. I love the granular detail or speculative granular detail in this, Dave. It also says their Premier League summer series fixtures against West Ham, Bournemouth and Everton will also likely be devoid of gift giving. It remains to be seen whether United changed their approach for Fiorentina at Old Trafford on August the 9th.

33:41Charlie Eccleshare:It should be up in the air because that should be pennant giving all the way. But it does sort of strike me as one of those things about it's a tradition, long held tradition. We're still doing it. But once you've sort of been around for as long as Man United and all the clubs have that they're playing, it's like if you play someone for the first time, I think that's sort of fine. Yeah. But otherwise, they'll just where do these pennants go? They're just collecting dust in a museum somewhere or like is each one kept? Is it just in a box somewhere? What's the auction door? Essentially, it's tat.

34:13Charlie Eccleshare:I quite like this idea, Charlie. You should only exchange penance if you've never played each other before. That would be class. That would be really class. You preserve the honour of the tradition whilst saving money at the same time. But then you might want... I can see why if it's a certain club, you'd want more than just one, even for a museum. But then there are definitely clubs where, yeah, you're like, all right, it's like going somewhere. You're like, right, I've ticked it off. I've done it now. I don't need to do it again. Yes, well, yeah, maybe there is some logic in it after all. Next up, this came from Richard Simpson and Adam Simpson separately.

34:42Charlie Eccleshare:Here's the News Agents podcast discussing the level of Iran's terror threat to the UK. How would you characterise the view of the people at the top of MI5 and MI6 over this threat? Well, I think it was summed up very well by one of the agency heads who described it that Iran in terms of threat compared to China and Russia is in the top of the Championship League, not yet quite in the Premier League. Too good for the Championship, not good enough for the Premier League. Thing is Dave If they get to Premier League level They're going to have to change The way they terror attack Aren't they? They will have to invest Good of them as well To put it in terms that ITK John Soper will understand Yeah And the thing is If you get to Premier League level Dave If you make mistakes You'll get punished I mean that feels like You know With my limited grasp On international relations And geopolitics It feels like there isn't As much of a chasm Between Iran And the rest of the world As there is Between the top of the championship And the top of the Premier League Yeah, I was going to say, I think that's slightly underselling them.

35:42I'm not sure that analogy quite works. I mean, they're a sleeping giant, aren't they? Yeah, they're in, yeah, I would say in nuclear terms, they're in the Premier League. They might not be necessarily one of the big boys, but yeah, they're knocking around.

35:55Charlie Eccleshare:Someone hasn't been following the bombing of their nuclear facilities. But yeah, the chasm between the haves and the have-nots continues to grow. Next up, this came from StrikingBandico89. Here is golf caddy Billy Foster speaking on TalkSport about working with the USA's Colin Morikawa for the next few weeks. And looking ahead again, Billy, how are you going to cope with this Ryder Cup? You know, people are already calling you a traitor. Yeah, which I think is a bit strong, Billy. I think it's too strong. Listen, there's one thing, before you go any further, I'm working this week and next week, that's it.

36:28It's only a two-week dig with Colin. If by some minor miracle he won the Open next week and offered me the job, obviously I'd have to say well I'd love to work for you but I could not work the Ryder Cup for America let's put that on record right now that's a belter I love that we've done 16 Ryder Cups and you uh you bleed Europe love bleed Europe I think that's tremendous can you be a proud European

36:52Charlie Eccleshare:I suppose you can obviously you can in a Ryder Cup context but um bleeding Europe I've never heard before it's fantastic it it would work quite well actually if it was if you were to be the sort of figurative stick of rock the european flag actually would look quite nice if you if you cut your arm off and it was just there the stars um would you accept charlie if you if you if you cut me open i bleed blue and yellow would you be all right with that or would that be clear cut enough might imply sweden i mean that's what's the ludicrous thing in uh tennis they're trying to do a rider cup equivalent and it's europe against the rest of the world so like the idea or like i think it's called like team world but yeah the idea if you cut me open i bleed world Speed World.

37:30Charlie Eccleshare:Hope so, hope so. Next up, this guy was already in demand, but Stockport County have said they can confirm that first team coach Andy Mangan has departed the club in order to take up a new role at Brazilian side Botafogo. We wish Andy well in this exciting new chapter of his career. County fan replied with, I just hope our fans give him a good reception when Botafogo next visit Edgley Park. Class. Great answer. That is a great response. That would be a fixture worthy of a pennant, wouldn't it? Yeah, yeah. For sure. 100%. I would want stitching on the shirt for Botafogo versus Stockport. Who is this guy, by the way?

38:04Charlie Eccleshare:Because this was the guy who Real Madrid wanted to sign. And he couldn't get a work permit. They couldn't get clearance for him to move to Stockport. So he had to stay at Stockport. Carlo Ancelotti wanted him to sort of freshen up their attacking strategy. He's like an attacking coach. And now he's gone to Botafogo, who are now managed by Davide Ancelotti. So that's the connection. Oh, wow. Okay. Yeah, it's interesting. you do get those little curious links every now and again. Like, you know, Anthony Barry is currently, someone was Tuchel's number two. Paul Clement was with Ancelotti before, wasn't he?

38:36Yeah, if it works, it works.

38:38Charlie Eccleshare:But I mean, how revolutionary can his attacking strategies be, Charlie, to go from Stocksport to Botafogo? I mean, what has he cracked that nobody else has done? I'm not casting doubt on anything because I don't know, but I'm just fascinated by the idea of it. But do they need to be? I mean, or does he need to just be quite good? in the sense that like if a Premier League team appointed a Brazilian coach you'd just be like yeah I guess that's just what we do like it doesn't need to be a revolutionary as such it just needs to be quite good we just don't tend to think of kind of English coaches as being seen in that way because it's so unusual I guess for them to go and work abroad The language barrier surely would be more of an issue I don't know Andy Mangan may well be fluent in Portuguese but if he isn't if you're a coach surely that's more of a problem because if you're the manager you can kind of get away with still being this sort of figurehead motivator diagrams though translators actually a coach you're actually out there on the grass just yeah but you're just pointing at your magnets moving them around i guess so don't need portuguese for that yeah i wonder if the more specialist a coach you are the less language barrier becomes a problem because you are literally just you're expressing really simple straightforward concepts you're not talking you're not motivating you're not trying to g players up you're not trying to get in their heads you're just saying do this do that so i I don't know.

39:52I think motivating would be easier in a foreign language that you don't speak so well. You know, there are more, the language is a lot less technical and, you know, tone of voice, volume, gesticulating can get your point across to more of a degree than if you're explaining complex attacking patterns.

40:06Charlie Eccleshare:I can throw teacups in any language. Exactly, yeah. What an incredible career path that is. How about this, Dave? Football injuries you just don't hear about anymore. This came from J.O. Anil. He says, shin splints rarely get much of a look in these days. They seemed all the rage in the 90s. But whilst Jack Grealish had a period on the sidelines due to splints while playing for Villa, it seems like a once-everyday injury in serious decline. Do we know why? What happened? I'm not sure. Sports science. I don't know if you two would agree with me, but when I hear shim splints, I think of Andy Cole.

40:39Charlie Eccleshare:Oh, really? Is that right? He suffered with them in the mid-90s quite badly. And I think that was the first time I'd heard of it and was like, what are shim splints? because it's quite, as injury terminology goes, it's quite evocative, isn't it? Yeah. It's sort of a conscious image of something that's probably worse than what it actually is. Yeah, it does sound really bad. I think I remember seeing it on Championship Manager for the first time. Oh, right. And again, probably thinking like, is this real? Like, you know, it sounded a bit kind of made up. I can tell you it's debilitating. When I moved into a flat with hard floors for the first time, it really got me for a good couple of years.

41:13Charlie Eccleshare:Got myself some insoles, never looked back, never had it since. What were you doing? just absolutely sprinting around your flat every day. Just generally walking around your hard-floored flat with slight overpronation in your ankles. Trust me, the pressure starts to build up on your shins and it really hurts. It's just a big bruise all the way up the inside of your shin, but one you can't see. You touch it and it's like, ouch. So, yeah, that's it. That's shin splints. Haven't had them for 10 years now. So, recovering. Still recovering. But, yeah, don't want to get too comfortable. You never know where it can come back.

41:44Charlie Eccleshare:Finally, this came from Andrew Gornal, who got an email from Campaign Magazine in the marketing industry and their headline was David Lloyd Gyms raids Chelsea FC for their first CMO. Andrew says, Charlie, can an upmarket gym chain raid Chelsea? Is this a complex PSR deal with a David Lloyd physio moving the other way to balance the books? I don't like raid here at all. I suppose she could have been headhunted, Claire Cronin. The idea of them selling their training ground to David Lloyd or something. yeah I think they could Ray but it has to be more than just this they're just the one if there were you know a lot of Chelsea employees moving there an exodus slightly dramatic language Dave she's actually going to take Andy Mangan with her so David Lloyd-Jim's their marketing strategy is going to go stratospheric from now on can't believe she's left the club world champions as well what a time to leave I know doesn't get any better from there I guess anyway thanks to you Charlie Eccleshire thank you thanks to you David Walker Thank you.

42:45Charlie Eccleshare:Thanks to everyone for listening. We'll be back on Thursday. See you then.

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