The Commentators’ View: Spygate, Munchgate & VAR

15 May 2026 · 54 min · 25 chapters

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In short

The Football Daily’s “Commentator’s View” debate on VAR decisions (“Spygate” and “Munchgate” are referenced as commentary-game controversies), plus weekend fixture preview, “unintended pub names,” and “Clash of the Commentators” trivia.

Guests/hosts

Alistair Bruce Ball (host). John Murray and Ian Dennis (co-commentators). Other named contributors: Frau Cates (host of Tuesday Night Live), Darren Cann, Pat Nevin, Paul Robinson, Alan Shearer, Ed/“Chappers” (Five Live), and “Herr Chapman” (Herr Trouder joke).

Key claims

VAR should be “stripped back” unless errors are “clear and obvious”; long, forensic reviews frustrate spectators. West Ham’s VAR decision is broadly seen as correct; Celtic’s Fir Park decision is less clear-cut and took too long to reach consensus.

Notable examples

Thierry Henry handball; West Ham vs Arsenal VAR debate; Hearts vs Celtic title-race swing after a late penalty decision; FA Cup final City vs Chelsea preview; Sunderland vs Man United team news; “Munchgate” fake CAS ruling; FA Cup final goal-scorer quiz (Hutchinson, Gundogan, Di Matteo, etc.).

Written by AI. May contain mistakes. Listen to the episode to check what was said.

Chapters

Tap a time to open that second in VO

Edinburgh Experience

2:26 to 3:52

Hear about the hosts' experiences in Edinburgh and the excitement around Tynecastle.

“I know you wouldn't agree with this, Ali, but I thought she was the perfect host.”

Title Race Drama

3:53 to 5:30

Discussion on the implications of match outcomes on the football title race.

“Suddenly it was like someone had plugged Tynecastle back in.”

VAR Controversies

5:31 to 6:29

Insights into the VAR decisions affecting recent football matches and their criticism.

“And people are saying that's definitively a handball.”

Impact of VAR on Gameplay

6:30 to 8:04

Evaluation of how VAR has changed the nature of football and match officiating.

“And I think there was obviously other pushing and shoving and all sorts of challenges going on in that penalty area.”

Listener Interaction and Rhys Segment

8:05 to 11:46

Engagement with listeners sharing experiences and introducing a new Rhys listener.

“Unless it's clear and obvious, you can tell straight away, like the Thierry Henry one, that if it's anything over, then, I don't know, a three-minute sort of like set yourself a limit.”

Creative Commentary Moments

11:47 to 14:01

Fun anecdotes from the hosts about commentary quirks and memorable moments.

“Don't think he couldn't, you know, just one look from it.”

Team News and Player Changes

14:01 to 14:37

Discussion about team changes for Sunderland and Manchester United.

“So if we can get that going on a loop, that'll be done.”

Upcoming FA Cup Final Insights

14:38 to 16:51

Insights and predictions ahead of the upcoming FA Cup final.

“But for Manchester United, they have made five changes from their last outing.”

Premier League Weekend Preview

16:52 to 19:27

Previewing the significant matches in the Premier League over the weekend.

“Ian, I'm thinking Manchester City strong favourites.”

Controversies in Championship Playoffs

19:28 to 21:44

Discussing controversies surrounding the scheduling of championship playoffs.

“So that was Darren Moore talking about the miracle of Hillsborough, as it's known, but more from Darren Moore on the 72 plus EFL pod on the football daily as Aaron, Paul and co marked 40 years.”
Show all 25 chapters

Ethics in Football: Cheating Allegations

21:45 to 23:33

Debating the impact and implications of cheating allegations in football.

“And then you've got the situation for Hull City and their supporters, who have already probably made their journey plans to Wembley.”

Unintended Pub Names Segment

23:34 to 25:54

A light-hearted discussion on creative unintended pub names in football.

“And therefore, there will be people who are not involved, who are trying to protect Southampton Football Club, who've been put in this really awful position that they now face themselves in.”

Listener Contributions and Shared Stories

25:55 to 28:00

Sharing listener stories and pub name suggestions from around the world.

“Do you remember when he first came into the Premier League and I was assured it was Castellanos.”

The Flying Mullet and Unintended Pub Names

28:00 to 28:50

Discussing a fun commentary about a pub inspired by the Flying Mullet.

“The tries keep flowing for the Warriors right winger.”

Listener Contributions and Commentary Inspirations

28:50 to 30:20

Listeners share their creative pub names inspired by sports commentary.

“we've got one more here for the unintended pub names from James Porter.”

Clash of the Commentators Controversy

31:20 to 34:10

The hosts delve into a controversial commentary ruling involving fan engagement.

“If your best finance people are doing expense reports, chasing receipts, or spending time on month-end clothes, it's time to get Brex AF, a Gentic finance that eliminates that work before it starts.”

Debating Commentary Legitimacy and Scandals

34:10 to 35:50

Discussion on the legitimacy of commentary claims and humorous fan contributions.

“Senegal and Morocco and the Spygate scandal now need to get in touch with Dom from Bolton because he can sort it out very quickly.”

FA Cup Final Trivia Challenge

35:50 to 37:30

The hosts engage in a trivia challenge about FA Cup final goal scorers.

“Next I won't be able to walk on the street.”

Results and Reactions from the Trivia Challenge

37:30 to 42:01

Revealing the outcomes and discussing the performance in the trivia challenge.

“And the reason for that is because we are going to do minus points for incorrect answers.”

Fastest FA Cup Final Goals

42:01 to 43:08

Explore the record for the fastest FA Cup final goals and commentary trivia.

“Well, Dumatheus set the record at Wembley, wasn't it?”

The Glossary of Football Commentary

43:08 to 44:21

A discussion on football commentary terms and listener contributions.

“also used in other sports last week we put parachute payment 50p head and managerless into Division 1.”

Colloquial Football Expressions

44:21 to 45:50

Listeners share humorous expressions related to football commentary.

“But biscuit tins can be circular, can't they?”

Billy the Dog's Football Journey

45:50 to 47:28

A heartfelt segment about a listener's dog and its connection to football.

“And on a different theme, let's have another voice note.”

Protected Species in Sports

47:28 to 49:18

Discussion on the concept of 'protected species' in football and other sports.

“In his recovery We've got pictures, John, of Billy.”

Act of Pickpocketry in Commentary

49:18 to 51:08

Exploration of a unique phrase used in football commentary and listener contributions.

“I think what's also a protected species, and the picture of Billy the dog lying on the Leighton Orient crest.”
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Transcript

Automatic transcript. May contain errors.

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1:41Ali Bruce-Ball:The Commentator's View on the Football Daily with Alistair Bruce Ball, John Murray and Ian Dennis. Hello, this is the Football Daily. I'm Alistair Bruce Ball. This is the Commentator's View where where we five live commentators talk about the football, the places it takes us, and the words we use to describe the beautiful game. It's a very exciting season, home and abroad. It's coming towards a close. The World Cup on the way as well. John Murray, Ian Dennis are both here, as we all were, chaps, on Tuesday night live, on the wireless with Frau Cates, who you got me in a spot of bother with, didn't you, at the start of that show?

2:20Ian Dennis:Well, I think you got yourself into it.

2:22Ali Bruce-Ball:That's probably true.

2:23Ian Dennis:Don't blame me and John.

2:25Ali Bruce-Ball:That was good. It was good fun, though, wasn't it? Good show. Enjoyed that.

2:28Ian Dennis:Yeah. I know you wouldn't agree with this, Ali, but I thought she was the perfect host.

2:34Ali Bruce-Ball:She was. She was. She was. Yeah.

2:37Ian Dennis:And you've been busy since then, of course, Ali.

2:40Ali Bruce-Ball:Yeah. So I spoke to you Tuesday night. I got on a train in Salisbury at 6.45 on Wednesday morning to rattle my way up to Edinburgh. Didn't have long enough in Edinburgh. What a wonderful city Edinburgh is. It was so funny getting off the train at Waverley Station and the weather was quite changeable. So it was very sort of wet underfoot, but the sun was shining. And there were thousands of tourists around Edinburgh as I made my way towards Tynecastle who would have had absolutely no idea what was going on in the Scottish Premiership title race. And we're just enjoying enjoying the beauty of Edinburgh.

3:14Ali Bruce-Ball:So I got a little bit of that and then obviously had the night at Tynecastle, which which was an interesting experience, actually, because there was 12 minutes, I think, in the first half where Hearts were on their way to winning the title. And the energy in the stadium I found fascinating, actually, because it depended so heavily on what was going on at Fir Park. So in the second half of my game at Tynecastle, while Hearts were comfortably ahead but Celtic were ahead, the stadium actually went into a little bit of a lull because I think the Hearts fans were already thinking, right, we've got this job done, but with Celtic ahead, we cannot afford to lose now.

3:49Ali Bruce-Ball:We're going to have to get something at Celtic on Sunday. Then Motherwell scored the equaliser. Suddenly it was like someone had plugged Tynecastle back in. Then Hearts got another goal. And you were thinking, right, well, this is, you know, and everyone was up and bouncing and singing and dancing. And then that incredible late drama came after the final whistle at Tynecastle. So the players at Tynecastle were about to do, or in the process of doing that sort of lap of appreciation, lap of honour. And it was the classic air out of the balloon once people realised what had happened, how it had happened and what it meant.

4:21Ali Bruce-Ball:And as Pat Nevin said, it's incredible really because it went from Hearts being able to go to Celtic on Saturday and lose 2-0 and win the title, you'd make them favourites definitely there, to suddenly one decision, one penalty and Celtic now have to be favourites. So that switch between the two stadiums was remarkable really.

4:41Ian Dennis:That is going to be such a spectacle again, isn't it? And you and I will be at Wembley for the FA Cup final and we will be listening and watching to it, won't we, while we're sitting in our commentary box. We will indeed. But I just can't help but think that the decision, they need to strip back VAR. The reason VAR was brought in was because of that Thierry on Regal. And if it's not as clear and obvious as that, then don't get involved. They are making it so forensic. And I've watched it and I've listened to the various pundits in Scotland And I agree with those that say if it hits his hand, it would just drop.

5:19Ian Dennis:The ball wouldn't have bounced as far as it did if it had come off the hand. It's not clear cut. It's not a clear and obvious error.

5:26Ali Bruce-Ball:The thing I don't like, Ian, is people trying to justify the argument with a blurry freeze frame of where an arm is up and close to the ball. And people are saying that's definitively a handball. I didn't feel the replays I saw on the night were conclusive. I also think, you know, going back to the West Ham Arsenal one as well, which obviously, John, you know, you were there for that last weekend. The debate around it, I think so much of the discourse around it, not from us, I don't think, not from, you know, from professionals within the media, but is so charged with what people want to happen in the title race.

6:03Ali Bruce-Ball:And you're not looking at the facts of what actually happened.

6:05Ian Dennis:And I mean, I think with the decision at West Ham, I think that there was a lot in that about, well, there's not been the consistency because this happened earlier in the season and this didn't happen. I think in some ways you're not trying to make it consistent with previous decisions that may have been wrong. You're trying to make the right decision right now.

6:29Ali Bruce-Ball:Yeah, yeah. And I think there was obviously other pushing and shoving and all sorts of challenges going on in that penalty area. But if David Ryer is not fouled with having his shirt pulled and with having the arm across his neck, he's catching that ball. And that's the key foul. That's the one that materially impacts what goes on in that penalty area. I think the one, like Ian is saying, I think the one at Fir Park is just less clear cut.

6:55Ian Dennis:They are very, very different. My perception is now, you know, with the dust having settled after West Ham, that the general consensus is, well, more than the general consensus, the majority view is that that was the right decision. The right decision was made. It was the right decision. Less so with the Celtic decision. But how long did it take them to get to that right decision? But I do also understand why you had to do that. And I agree with, I think it was Darren Cann who was with us on Five Live, who said actually four minutes and whatever is it, 17 seconds, I think it was in the end, for such a crucial decision when there were a lot of things to judge.

7:35Ian Dennis:And we know it. We've sat in those seats at Stockley Park and are aware of the kind of scenario that they'll be in. You know, they have to get it right. But that's why I say I think they need to strip it back, because if it's not clear and obvious, then stop looking for something. VAR takes away. And I often think to myself, has goal line technology improved football? Undoubtedly. Has VAR improved football? As a spectator sport, inside the stadium, the answer is no. Unless it's clear and obvious, you can tell straight away, like the Thierry Henry one, that if it's anything over, then, I don't know, a three-minute sort of like set yourself a limit.

8:18Ian Dennis:And if it's anything over that, then just say, I'm sorry, we're not giving it. because the referees now are always looking for something. I find it so frustrating.

8:26Ali Bruce-Ball:Yeah, Alan Shearer agrees with you, Ian. There was a social media post from him in the week, but we were told it was for absolute howlers only, and they won't re-referee maximum benefit, minimum interference, exclamation mark, hashtag get rid of it from Alan Shearer. So it's played a massive part. It's played a massive part in the two title races. there is no denying that

8:51Ian Dennis:and the other thing of course this week as we know as we'll find out you know this is not an end to the controversy of the week is it goodness me I've seen that coming out on the screen there's more on that there's more on that to come

9:04Ali Bruce-Ball:I'm going to stay out of that I'm just going to read what's written down and let you two get on with it stay out of it so this is the commentator's view all your correspondence please to tcv at bbc.co.uk voice notes on whatsapp to the football daily number which is 08000 289369. Before the World Cup, by the way, we are going to do a Q &A special. So if you've got any questions ahead of the World Cup, you will have plenty, I know. Please do get in touch like that. And we've had a message, chap, so let's kick it off with this. A message from one of the Reeses. They're back in East London. We've actually lost track which one is which now.

9:43Ali Bruce-Ball:But last week we found out we had two listeners called Rees, same spelling, both from East London, both from the 90s and this whatsapp message reads as follows dear tcv the other reese from east london here i was so pleased to hear that reese was a west ham fan as it should be when you're in east london with reese also being a 90s fan i'm starting to think we're one of the same perhaps twins separated at birth one thing that may be able to distinguish from one another is that i featured as the guest manager on ali's more or less popular podcast fantasy 606 last year now called the fpl pod from BBC Sport.

10:19Ali Bruce-Ball:He may remember me, and I do now, by my surname, Mavericks. That is a brilliant surname. Rhys Mavericks. He's very good.

10:30Ian Dennis:He should be playing in the PGA Championship. You could imagine him tea after an hour. I hope his nickname is Top Gun.

10:42Ali Bruce-Ball:It's going to be something like that. As for the TCV, Rhys Collective, I've already commissioned the design of membership cards and t-shirts for us all kind regards and good day to you all so so we wait to hear from from uh from reese maverick's counterpart but there is a way now i did say surnames last week actually but that that is um i mean if the other one is called reese goose or

11:05Ian Dennis:reese iceman then we really are in business however there is a twist on this which i've not heard this yet but this is our first voice note hi john ian and ali um really enjoyed the podcast as usual this morning on my morning run and happened to catch the segments with the two West Ham fans, both called Rhys, growing up in the 90s as well. I'm also a Rhys, spelt the Welsh way, R-H-Y-S. Perhaps that's a way of differentiating us. I'm in Newcastle, but I've been a Manchester United fan since growing up in Hertfordshire and then in Wales. But I've got a son who's a Newcastle United fan. I've got Geordie children.

11:44But yeah, keep up the good work. Thanks.

11:46Ali Bruce-Ball:so more Reese's so that different spelling different club that he supports does he start his own a separate Reese club or what do we think

11:56Ian Dennis:I think it's probably going to be up to the other two Reese's isn't it to decide what to do with him

12:03Ali Bruce-Ball:whether he goes into Div 1 or Div 2 as we do in our glossary by the way I'm really really just before we get onto the football that's coming your way on 5 Live and BBC Sounds over the weekend I'm really quite chuffed with this next little bit particularly the production from Nathan here but I was in the car uh on Saturday driving to Manchester listening to Five Live Sport ahead of City Brentford and Herr Chapman at one point said something that just immediately stuck in my head and I think we might have found a new musical earworm so we had correspondence last week didn't we about the Nuno Espirito Santo earworm that might be costing one of our listeners their marriage because it was so annoying that he kept singing it again and again and again well i think i heard what could be an abba earworm uh from the afore mentioned hair chapman on five live this week so in the show he was talking about um the respect that football players had for sven jordan erickson just just just have a listen to this that's invaluable though isn't it that that kind of calmness and i go back to something i can remember doing the sort of tribute program to sven after sven died and and former players who had played under Sven saying, don't think that he didn't let you know when he wasn't happy with something.

13:18Don't think he couldn't, you know, just one look from it. He didn't even have to adjust one look and you knew that you would let him down. You know, just one look from it. Didn't even have to adjust one look and you knew that you would let him down.

13:40Ian Dennis:How delighted with that. That is very good. I was actually listening to that at the time, but that didn't register with me.

13:48Ali Bruce-Ball:It immediately took me to Mamma Mia. As soon as he said it, I actually did the chorus. In the car, I just thought, right, I'm having that. And Nathan has worked his magic. I texted Nathan. I said, do you think this will work? I'm not sure. And he messaged me back this morning. So if we can get that going on a loop, that'll be done.

14:05Ian Dennis:I've got to say, that's very creative. Well done. Because I actually had my own fun last Saturday with Chappers that Sunderland had made one change. And I think it was one of you two that planted the seed with Herr Trouder, the Sunderland player. And I said, from Herr Chapman to Herr Trouder. And he said, are you laughing at your own jokes now, are you? Let's get some team news from our three o 'clock games. We'll start at the Stadium of Light. This is our base, Sunderland against Manchester United. Ian. And from Herr Chapman to Herr Trouder, because he is the player who comes in for Sunderland for the suspended Ballard.

Read the full transcript

14:37Ian Dennis:It's the only change that Sunderland have made from the team that played Wolves. But for Manchester United, they have made five changes from their last outing. So Mats Rawi comes in for Dallow. Martinez is back from suspension for Heaven. Mountfort and Bumo. Ahmad, who once had a loan spell here at the Stadium of Light, for Sesco. And Xerxi for Casemiro. You all right there, laughing at your own joke through the team news? Anybody who listens to the Commentator's View podcast would appreciate that. They would, all three of them. Let's go to Craven Cottage. It was actually, again, Paul Robinson.

15:06Ian Dennis:and invaluable contributor to this podcast. I was doing a commentary on Sunderland with Paul a few months ago and I referred to Herr Trowder and he was straight in and said, Herr Trowder as opposed to Herr Chapman.

15:24Ali Bruce-Ball:You could actually, I could hear you giggling doing your team news at that, Ian. Yes, I did, I did hear that. You were struggling to control the laughter. Right, so coming your way on Five Live and BBC Sounds this weekend And as John has mentioned, you two will be at the FA Cup final. But the FA Cup final being on Saturday, 3 o 'clock kick-off on Saturday, means that the usual Premier League Saturday schedule is on Sunday instead. So this is how it lines up. And Saturday, it's an absolute humdinger. So Connor McNamara and Pat Nevin will be there at Celtic Park for Celtic Hearts in the shootout to decide who wins the Scottish Premiership title.

16:02Ali Bruce-Ball:Hearts start a point ahead. If Celtic win the game, then they will catch them on the final day of the season. And I think I'm right in saying Hearts have been ahead of them since September. I think there's one night in April that Hearts have not been top of that table up until this point. They could get caught on the final day. Don't miss that. And then Saturday, three o 'clock, chaps, Manchester City, Chelsea in the FA Cup final. Paul Robinson on duty with you two. So that's perfect for the commentator's view. How are we feeling? Ian, how are we feeling ahead of a cup final? Or was it a very special day in the English footballing calendar?

16:36Ian Dennis:A very special day. Let's not gloss over the fact that it shouldn't be being played before the end of the Premier League season, which has now become set in stone. But I think we should still refer to that because that is not as it should be. It should be that the FA Cup final comes after the end of the Premier League season. But agreed, that's where we are. Ian, I'm thinking Manchester City strong favourites. I think in a virtually a clean bill of health and obviously there are a lot of question marks at the moment hanging over Chelsea and where they're going what's going to happen and um and whereas Manchester City just feel that they are in the groove yes very strong favorites although I guess he's got that balancing act hasn't he because he obviously had the the game in midweek against Crystal Palace he's got the game at Bournemouth on Tuesday they're still very much in the uh in the title race.

17:27Ian Dennis:And also, there were probably strong favourites going into the final last year against Crystal Palace, but City have lost the last two finals. And only one club before has lost three successive finals, and that, ironically, was Chelsea. Yes, although Chelsea have lost their last three FA Cup finals that they've been in. But I also think Chelsea really turned up for that semi-final against Leeds United. So there's recent memory for those players of turning up and putting in a performance at Wembley.

17:55Ali Bruce-Ball:And if Pep Guardiola wins the FA Cup again, he joins, because I remember doing this in the semi-final in my notes, and I'm sure this will be in your notes by the time it comes to the final on Saturday, he'll join a very elite list of managers. There'll only be three or four of them who've won the FA Cup that many times, Arsene Wenger, Sir Alex Ferguson, and a couple from back in the day who off the top of my head, I'm not going to get their names. But it will be a big achievement for him and for the club. So that's three o 'clock on Saturday. Sunday then the Premier League action leads Brighton on 5 Live at 3 and Brentford Crystal Palace on Sports Extra at 3 o 'clock and then I think the big game of the day in the Premier League because of the situation West Ham are in is at 5.30 St James' Park Newcastle West Ham that's with Ailey Barber and Andy Reid and then as you say John just taking it forward into next week you're going to be at Arsenal Burnley and then Bournemouth Manchester City reporting on those games for us on the Tuesday as the title race goes to the wire ahead of the final weekend of the season.

18:58Ian Dennis:Yeah, Monday will be updates into the Monday night club on Arsenal's home game against Burnley, but it is commentary on Tuesday night, the Bournemouth Manchester City match. And obviously what happens in those two matches will let us know. We'll have a closer idea of what the destiny of the title is going to be and potentially setting things up for the final Sunday. and then obviously it's then the first of the three european finals that five live and the bbc sounds that will be covering because you've got leipzig and budapest to come the two of you the following week but uh istanbul aston villa against freiburg on wednesday will be live on

19:37Ali Bruce-Ball:five live for the europa league final yeah five live bbc sounds uh the place to be for all of it right we're on to the pub names uh unintended pub names courtesy all the way back from paul Robinson who's getting plenty of mentions in this episode of TCV so we're going to do unintended pub names before we return to league action in Clash of the Commentators last week we had the simmering Simeone the XG and from John in Narangba Australia we had the pizza van called Sliced by Saliba we also mentioned the chorus of booze which former Sheffield Wednesday manager Darren Moore used on the 72-plus podcast this week as he reflected on their playoff comeback against Peterborough.

20:19What I didn't say to you, lads, that all in training, all that week after the game, I was doing penalty kicks from the Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, trained at Hillsborough under a chorus of noises at the stadium under the tannoy of chorus of boos and that, so tactical beats like that.

20:38Ali Bruce-Ball:So that was Darren Moore talking about the miracle of Hillsborough, as it's known, but more from Darren Moore on the 72 plus EFL pod on the football daily as Aaron, Paul and co marked 40 years. Yeah, 40 years of the playoffs now.

20:50Ian Dennis:And of course, as we speak now, I mean, possibly one of the biggest stories unfolding in the entire 40 years of the playoffs in that, I mean, it is an extraordinary situation. I have to say, I feel for the supporter, for all of the supporters, because I just don't How can you possibly organise yourself for a match where we are unsure when and where this championship playoff is going to be played? Yeah, it is a real mess. And I'm not too sure how the EFL can unravel it in the time frame before the match was scheduled to be played. And I know there's the possibility that it could be postponed. But then where do you then reschedule the game?

21:35Ian Dennis:And I agree with you, John. I feel for the Southampton supporters, who could be deprived of a place at Wembley and maybe going up. The Middlesbrough supporters, I know for a fact, are clearly and quite rightly aggrieved. And then you've got the situation for Hull City and their supporters, who have already probably made their journey plans to Wembley. But also, in terms of a preparation, are they preparing for a game against Southampton? Or are they preparing for a game against Middlesbrough? What do the Middlesbrough players do? they're hanging around they're waiting it is a real real mess Middlesbrough players training for a match that might never happen yeah

22:13Ali Bruce-Ball:if we rewind it back to what actually happened that's led us to this point how heinous do you think the offence is how much of an impact do you have

22:23Ian Dennis:that's for the inquiry to find out yeah and try to get to the bottom of how impactful yeah it was what was allegedly done. I think it's got to be a sporting sanction because it has to send out a message to other clubs as a deterrent that this type of thing cannot happen. And therefore, I thought Kim Helberg after the game summed it up really, really well when he was talking about he'd put aside time with his family to spend another five hours watching and looking for those fine details, those fine margins that you can gain from watching games against Southampton. Whereas if it is proven and then they've been able to get an insight from what they've gleaned on the training field, that therefore is an unfair advantage.

23:15Ian Dennis:And if that is proven, then that is blatant cheating. Of course, part of this is that in an absolutely ideal world, you would want the correct amount of time to either prepare a case or prepare a defence. And they haven't got that. No. And also, talking of feeling sorry for the Southampton supporters, the actions of whoever is compliant within the football club, if it again is proven to be true, this alleged incident, has then tarnished the reputation of Southampton Football Club. And therefore, there will be people who are not involved, who are trying to protect Southampton Football Club, who've been put in this really awful position that they now face themselves in.

24:00Ali Bruce-Ball:Well, we'll follow it as the story develops, but I think that's very important that we discuss that. Back to the unintended pub names. Here's a fresh one from Sports Commentary. It comes from Paul in Tring. I was on a walk on Sunday afternoon listening to Rob Green and John Murray's dulcet tones from the West Ham Arsenal game and heard a great unintended pub name.

24:22Ian Dennis:Declan Rice curls it in, good delivery, flicked on, blocked on the line, a scramble on the edge of the six-yard box and Castellanos was there. a very relieved Castellanos to find the ball bounced to him and with his right foot just cleared it out for a throw on the far side. The relieved Castellanos, which sounds like the kind of pub with a backstory nobody can agree on. Half Mediterranean Sailors Tavern, half old British local that accidentally became legendary. From the outside it would probably sit tucked into a side street near a harbour or Old Town Square. Faded navy blue paint Hanging flower baskets that have seen better days And maybe a creaking wooden sign Showing a very relaxed looking Police constable reclining in a chair With his boots off and pint in hand Inside the atmosphere would feel instantly warm And slightly chaotic in the best way possible Low wooden beams Brass hooks with old coats Mismatched furniture that nobody has replaced Because that's just how the relieved Costiños is a pub dog asleep next to the machine who ignores everyone except those eating chips.

25:33Nobody really knows why the name Relieved Kosty Anios is there, but overall you'll feel much, much better after a night in this pub.

25:42Ali Bruce-Ball:The amount of thought, work, creativity.

25:45Ian Dennis:He's done very well there, Paul, hasn't he? Paul is great. He's gone full on with the... Full on. And also, it's right, confusion is the right word, because his surname continues to... Do you remember when he first came into the Premier League and I was assured it was Castellanos. Yeah. Castellanos. And then Conor, I think, possibly spoke to him or was in the dressing room area. And it was, no, no, it's Castellanos. And then he didn't say Castellanos, he said Castellanos. No, Conor said it was Castellanos. No, because it was Castellanos and then he changed it to Castellanos. But not Castellanos.

26:26Ian Dennis:But Castellanos is that that's the English way. So Castellanos is the South American way. Castellanos is the Spanish way. And Castellanos is the English way. I think Clare himself said that he, the player, said Castellanos. Well, knowing you, you'll probably start up a petition now as well.

26:47Ali Bruce-Ball:Yeah, we'll get to that in a second. I mean I hope Ailey Barber's not listening to this ahead of Newcastle West Ham commentary just go your own way Ailey make your own decision

26:57Ian Dennis:I think we need to reconvene and discuss it in the relieved Castellanos

27:03Ali Bruce-Ball:yes yes yes yes right how about this from Andy in Australia hi Ali John Ian et al love the pod listening to the latest episode imagine my surprise to hear my adopted hometown of Narangba being mentioned I thought I would be the only TCV listener here, but it just shows how far reaching you are, that even in a country town north of Brisbane, there are listeners aplenty. So there's another club getting started here. This was the push to finally take the time to write. I try to watch as many EPL and EFL games as possible, Premier League and EFL games as possible, plus catching up on all the pods on my daily work commute.

27:40Ali Bruce-Ball:However, I'm also a keen rugby league fan, and I regularly think of TCV, as we have a fantastic, unintentional pub name in the guise of Dallin Watanay Zalesniak when scoring his trademark tries from the wing. Here's Spickle Clifford, ticked on. The flying mallet goes in again. It's Dallin Watanay Zalesniak. The tries keep flowing for the Warriors right winger. And the flying mallet, well, he just gets it down the flying mallet.

28:12Ian Dennis:the timing of his run. Each of the good wingers of the guy and the great wingers, they make it happen, Matty.

28:19Ali Bruce-Ball:So Andy says, I envisage the Flying Mullet to be a country-style pub with dusty utes in the parking lot and ice-cold beers on tap as the blazing sun sets. Keep up the excellent work from Andy, listener number two in Narangba, Down Under.

28:33Ian Dennis:Fancy that, two listeners in Narangba. As soon as you've just mentioned the word utes, I just had a flashback to Joe Mangle. Yeah. The Neighbours.

28:41Ali Bruce-Ball:Yeah. Yeah, that's what I always think of when I hear that term. Ute being utility vehicle, isn't it? I think that's short form. Right, before we get on to Clash of the Commentators, we've got one more here for the unintended pub names from James Porter. Hi all, an unintended pub name for you from last weekend, from Alistair Bruce Ball. Shirky, surrounded by red and white striped shirts, jinx his way out of trouble, then points as he passes to Gehi to say, move that on quickly to Ake and wide to Doku. another dangerous dribbler for Manchester City. Coyote really focusing on that ball. The dangerous dribbler.

29:18A small cathedral city pub. Think Bath, Lincoln, York. Tucked away down a narrow cobbled alley and a bit like Big John's Madrid bar only frequented by those in the know. Knock three times on the door and you'll be asked for the password which of course is justice for John before being admitted. Local ales and ciders only, some brewed in the same way now as they were by the monks. But watch out for the strength of some of the ales, which pack a punch and earn the pub its name.

29:53Ian Dennis:Well done, James. BBC colleague of ours, James Porter. Well, a friend of yours, it would seem.

30:00Ali Bruce-Ball:Thank you to James for the Dangerous Ribbler. If you spot an unintended pub, film or food kiosk name in any sports commentary that you hear on the radio or the television, do let us know tcv at bbc.co.uk whatsapps to 08000 289 369 5 Live Sports So here's the first ball of this series All the cricket you'd laugh Check for LBW Out! Lives on BBC Sounds Smash straight back down the ground This girl Here ball by ball coverage of the biggest competitions on the domestic and international circuits It's a fourth week And it's the huge one. Jeez. Wash. Settle down. I'm sorry. Cricket on Five Live Sport.

30:45Ian Dennis:Oh, I've lived every ball of this. Listen on BBC Sounds.

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31:42Ali Bruce-Ball:The Commentators' View on the Football Daily with Alistair Bruce Ball, John Murray and Ian Dennis. On to Clash of the Commentators. Controversy is on the way. So, Ed in Maidstone asks, has there been a stewards' inquiry into the Clash of the Commentators where John was robbed? Surely this should lead Sports Report, with Hare Chapman reading it out as a top story. I can hear Denno sighs already.

32:13Ian Dennis:It's stronger than sighs, Ed, I'll tell you that. Yeah, you know what's coming here, don't you? He's actually got his hands on his head.

32:18Ali Bruce-Ball:Yeah, yeah. We did have an email land in the TCV inbox this week claiming to be an official ruling from the Court of Arbitration for Sports, and this follows on from the clash of the commentators category things you could do during a VAR delay. It reads as follows. The commentators view Munchgate dispute. That's the heading at the top of this official sheet of paper. Football. Interpretation of rules and linguistic variation. Point one. The panel observes that the wording of the task did not prohibit synonymous expressions. Point two, the panel finds that John Murray submitted valid lexical actions including eat, munch and chew.

33:00Ali Bruce-Ball:Point three, variation in synonymous expressions is recognised within football commentary practice. The operative part of the ruling as follows. Point one, the appeal is upheld. Point two, the disputed point is awarded to John Murray. Point three, this award is final and binding. Lausanne, 10th of May, 2026.

33:26Ian Dennis:Well, straight away it's fake because it's actually from Bolton fan Dom claiming to be an official ruling from the Court of Arbitration for Sport. So that's thrown out straight away. The other thing to say is that Dom has got far too much time on his hands. And also, there's a new hashtag, Injustice for Ian. It's a great piece of work. The actual document, because we've all seen what appears to be a valid document from the Court of Arbitration for Sport. And it's brilliantly laid out just like all of those sort of official ruling letters. I've got two additional thoughts as well, very quickly.

34:10Ian Dennis:Senegal and Morocco and the Spygate scandal now need to get in touch with Dom from Bolton because he can sort it out very quickly.

34:18Ali Bruce-Ball:I mean, just to take it all the way back, chaps, for those listeners who've joined late who can't remember what we're talking about. This was a game of Clash of the Commentators that Ian won, that I was hosting. It was the longest VAR delay of the season. Things you could get done within that same time. That's what it was. And Ian was awarded the win. Anyway, look. I mean, if that is legal and binding... Which I think it should be. Which is not. Okay. If it was, if it were to be, we'd be taking a point off Ian and awarding it to John. Which, for the neutrals... Which we're not. I mean, you talk about Celtic Hearts at the weekend.

34:50Ali Bruce-Ball:This is Celtic Hearts all over it. Because you then have Ian 9 from 15 and John 8 from 16 and me 7 from 16. Now this week, John, I think you're in charge.

35:03Ian Dennis:Yeah, but you see, that's what the people want, isn't it? It's a little bit like the Hearts Celtic penalty scenario, isn't it? That there's a lot of sentiment in this because it's what the people want. They want this to be a tight contest. And also, I think, for all of the work Dom's put into that, you know, he deserves. No, he doesn't. Dom deserves as well. Dom doesn't deserve anything.

35:32Ali Bruce-Ball:But it also, John, it heaps pressure on me today because I need to beat Ian to give you a chance.

35:38Ian Dennis:How exciting will that be if you win today? I know, but I'm rubbish at this. That would be two points separating the three. I know. It would be great. I'm going to go to HR. I think this is bullying now. You can't accuse listeners of bullying you, Ian. I can. You're waging a campaign against me. Next I won't be able to walk on the street. I've not orchestrated it. It's come from the outside. Chipping away, chipping away. When was the episode?

36:09Ali Bruce-Ball:Months ago.

36:10Ian Dennis:Exactly. It's Mourinho-esque behaviour. Wouldn't go away. Wouldn't go away. So there we are. anyway Dom well done and thank you right this week's Clash of the Commentators will be Ian who is still top but has lost each of his last three and has now had a point deducted up against Ali who is now rooted at the bottom of the table so this is where Clash of the Commentators two of us take turns to answer a question and give as many correct answers as we can in 30 seconds and this is a good one. This is a good one. You'll like this. But I have a feeling it might be slightly weighted in Ian's favour, but we'll see.

36:55Ian Dennis:Here we go again. Mind games. Blimey. We'll see. Who's going to go further? Well, I tell you what, I'm being assertive. I'm going first because the last three times I've been polite and I've said, oh no, yeah, I'll let you decide and then I've lost. Okay. So I'm being right. I'm taking, I'm seizing the initiative and I'm I'm grappling the bull by its horns. Okay. Ali has gone. Yeah. All right. You ready? Yeah, ready. Right. Now, do think carefully for this one. It's a good question, but you do need to think a little bit carefully. And the reason for that is because we are going to do minus points for incorrect answers.

37:36Ian Dennis:So it's one of those ones. Yeah. So it had to be an FA Cup final question. Saturday, 3 o 'clock on 5 Live. commentary, Chelsea, Manchester City. And Ian, I want you to name any player to have scored in an FA Cup final for either Chelsea or Manchester City. And remember, minus points for wrong answers. So FA Cup final goal scorers for Chelsea or City in any FA Cup final they were in. And your time starts now. OK, Tommy Hutchinson, Gundogan, Roberto Di Matteo

38:21I'm thinking Vialli Oh come on, come on, come on

38:35Ian Dennis:Bernardo Silva

38:39Ian Dennis:I didn't want to go wrong No, it does make it tricky, that. It might not be enough. It might not be. It might not be, but there is still the possibility of the minus answers. Yeah. So I'll wave Ali back. Here he comes. Hello. Okay. As I said to Ian, do think carefully for this one. It is a good question, but you do have to think quite carefully because this is one of those questions where there will be minus points for incorrect answers. Right. So, it had to be an FA Cup final question.

39:16Ali Bruce-Ball:Yeah.

39:17Ian Dennis:Saturday, 3 o 'clock, commentary on the final between Chelsea and Manchester City. And I want you to name any player to have scored in an FA Cup final for either Chelsea or Manchester City. Any final that they were in.

39:33Ali Bruce-Ball:Yeah.

39:33Ian Dennis:But minus points for wrong answers. So FA Cup final goal scorers for Chelsea or City. Your time starts now.

39:43Ali Bruce-Ball:Tommy Hutchinson scored at both ends, didn't he, for Manchester City. De Bruyne, Sterling, Drogba, Lampard. So many Chelsea finals. Who else do they play?

40:03Chelsea, Chelsea, Chelsea Oh come on you can get better than this

40:07Ali Bruce-Ball:Did Malouda score in a cup final?

40:15Now

40:16Ian Dennis:you see is that now counted? Did Malouda is that one of the answers? Sorry it was yeah it was

40:22Ali Bruce-Ball:sorry I shouldn't have said it by which could be costly Oh right yeah it was silly then

40:29Ian Dennis:However, I think Ian might also have been done by a minus answer as well. They both said Tommy Hutchinson. You did. You both thought it was easy. Actually, if you'd actually just said Hutchinson, you would have got another one as well, because Ian Hutchinson scored for Chelsea in the 1970 final against Leeds. Okay, I think we've got an outcome. Hazard. I didn't do enough.

40:59Ali Bruce-Ball:Hazard penalty.

41:01Ian Dennis:Okay. Ali. Yes. You went Tommy Hutchinson. Yes. De Bruyne, Sterling, Drogba, Lampard, Malouda. Five correct, one wrong, Malouda. So four points. Stupid. No, I didn't get that. No. Tommy Hutchinson, Gundogan, Di Matteo, Fiali was wrong, and Bernardo Silva is wrong. Oh. So three correct, two wrong. so that is a long point the losing sequence goes on the losing sequence goes on and Drogba was the big miss Drogba only Ian Rush has scored more goals in FA Cup finals than Didier Drogba but I can absolutely see why you said Viali and Bernardo Silva

41:46Ali Bruce-Ball:I mean the Gundogan, that is such a famous FA Cup and Di Matteo

41:50Ian Dennis:I knew Ian would get Gundogan because Ian commentated on it but also Di Matteo was one of the quickest goals for a while, wasn't it? It was against Middlesbrough. Yeah. Well, Dumatheus set the record at Wembley, wasn't it? It was the fastest FA Cup final goal at Wembley, but then Gundogan scored what is the fastest FA Cup final goal. Didn't Louis Sahar? Sahar, that's right. That's right, 25 seconds. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, Sahar. 25 seconds.

42:19Ali Bruce-Ball:Everton 2009. Yeah, the De Bruyne and Sterling ones were in the big win against Watford. I do remember them. Those ones, I think. I think that's right.

42:26Ian Dennis:that was too circumspect yeah

42:29Ali Bruce-Ball:well that's the thing that's the thing so that's interesting though isn't it if the ruling from Lausanne forward slash Bolton stands

42:36Ian Dennis:that leaves it now Ian 9 from 16 me 8 from 16 and Ali 8 from 17 yeah it could hardly be tighter we're going to have our own heart Celtic head to head it would seem how contrived

42:57Ali Bruce-Ball:now onto the great glossary of football commentary as we add commentary terms and phrases to our collection you can find the entire glossary in the episode description so division one football exclusive terms division two for terms used in football commentary but also used in other sports last week we put parachute payment 50p head and managerless into Division 1. David in Durham gets in touch. Your inclusion of 50p head in Division 1 took me straight back to the 70s, 80s, when derisive shouts of Thrutney Bithead would harangue any player who duffed a header. Thank you for all your match commentaries.

43:37Ali Bruce-Ball:And Ian from Ellesmere Port says, I enjoyed last week's discussion about how cultural reference points change with time. Sterling Moss to Lewis Hamilton and Carol Vorderman to Rachel Riley. I wonder how long it took before the Threepney bit head was superseded by the 50p head. And this has come in from Simon in Middlesbrough. Hi, gents. I listen every week. Last one, you mentioned about 50p head, which reminded me of my university days when one summer I was coaching soccer in America. And the expression for a misplaced header was, he has a head like a sheriff's badge. Other colloquial scenes for a misplaced header, he's got a biscuit tin on his head.

44:14And I'm sure there are others out there. so let's see if we can get a few more going. Love the pod as always. Justice for John. Justice for Borough. Keep it going, lads. Sheriff's badge.

44:27Ali Bruce-Ball:That's excellent.

44:28Ian Dennis:Head like a biscuit tin. I've never heard that before.

44:32Ali Bruce-Ball:But biscuit tins can be circular, can't they?

44:34Ian Dennis:Well, they can also be sort of hexagonal as well, can't they?

44:38Ali Bruce-Ball:They can.

44:39Ian Dennis:And head like a sheriff's badge is a great one. That is brilliant. Have you heard that before? Never. No. That is a good one. that yeah shall i do mark yeah you want bulgaria is that a first is that first about listening from bulgaria yeah i don't remember another one from bulgaria anyway mark says when the term 50p head was added last week i was waiting patiently for messrs murray and dennis to interject and add comment based on their geographic backgrounds i was somewhat surprised that messers Murray and Dennis did not rise to the occasion. Back in the day in the football league across Yorkshire prior to the introduction of the pyramid system every amateur footballer, manager, coach and spectator used only one phrase to accurately describe the misfortune of a player heading a ball in the wrong direction.

45:34Ian Dennis:He would be described as having a 10 bob bit head suggesting a player has a 50p piece head seems more appropriate to commentating to a prone cocktail-esque crowd in Gen Z rather than supporters of an older generation. And on a different theme, let's have another voice note. Hi, TCV crew. Chris here from Bucks with one for the glossary and an additional suggestion for the TCV Dog 11. I'd like to offer up my flat-coated cockapoo Billy as winger and captain, who absolutely loves his Saturday morning walks while we listen to the pod. and I'm going to challenge anyone to find a more footballing dog than mine.

46:14Billy has recently undergone his first of two cruciate ligament surgeries, which has meant for a while we were listening to the pod during rehab sessions at home rather than out on his walks, but thankfully he's now fully recovered and bounding around the Chilton Hills with me as I record this. Billy's cruciate injury happened in the most innocuous of circumstances. We're just simply running around and bounding back to me with one of his legs lifted up. so unfortunately I didn't see the full motion but one would say he had just gone down in installments and I thought going down installments might be an unexplored addition to the glossary

46:47Ali Bruce-Ball:well firstly I'm glad to hear Billy's Billy's doing a bit better going down in installments that that is that's a good one it also made me think about you know in football commentary when you talk about a player going down and there's no one near him and that's not a good sign if Billy's gone down there and there's no other dogs near him or sharp twigs near him then you know that's not a good sign I don't know would that be glossary-esque?

47:10Ian Dennis:Yeah those innocuous injuries often tend to be the worst don't they?

47:14Ali Bruce-Ball:Exactly What about going down in instalments?

47:17Ian Dennis:Probably Division 2 isn't it? You'd probably get that in other that's probably seeped into other sports hasn't it? Yeah We should send our best wishes to Billy shouldn't we? In his recovery

47:29Ali Bruce-Ball:We've got pictures, John, of Billy.

47:31Ian Dennis:Yeah, we have. There's actually a little bit more as well. Yeah, there is. A nice little extra bit from Chris here, talking about his dog, Billy, and his football credentials. While we lived in Leighton, Leighton Orient FC put out a genuine cry for help for local dog owners. The club needed dogs to come for early morning walks around the pitch and do what they needed to do in order to deter foxes from digging up and scratching around the pitch. So naturally, Billy answered the call. For three weeks, he and we proudly centred up the stadium and could often be found sitting on the club crest by the subs bench, genuinely looking like he owned the place.

48:06So I'll put it to you. Is there a dog 11 for TCV team? And is there a better captain fit than Billy?

48:13Ian Dennis:When he said he and we, he should have just said he, did we? He also included there, Chris, a genuine cry for help. I'm surprised he didn't go for a come and get me, plea.

48:28Ali Bruce-Ball:Yes. Very good. By the way, talking about animals helping out stadiums, the hawk at Tyne Castle is a fine sight to keep the gulls away.

48:36Ian Dennis:Yes, I saw that after the Rangers game the other week.

48:40Ali Bruce-Ball:Flying around in the stands

48:41Ian Dennis:before the game. I quite like the idea of the dog 11. That would be Billy, brackets, Leighton Orient.

48:49Ali Bruce-Ball:Yes, exactly. Dogs that are connected to clubs. Get in touch, TCV at bbc.co.uk. Rich says that the title of Sunday's 606 podcast following the West Ham Arsenal game was, Are goalkeepers a protected species? I can't imagine any other sport where a player in a certain position is referred to as a protected species, including goalkeepers in other sports such as hockey. I therefore propose a Division I entry for protected species.

49:19Ian Dennis:Could be. I think what's also a protected species, and the picture of Billy the dog lying on the Leighton Orient crest. Those club crests have become protected species, haven't they? You know, the whole thing with Arsenal, Atletico Madrid, and oh my goodness, he stepped on the, he stepped, oh, what disrespect. He stepped on the crest on the floor. Yeah. I have to say that's one that I've not got a great deal of time for. No. No. If you don't want people to stand on it, then don't put it on the floor. Well, exactly. Yeah, it's like a doormat. Welcome to our club. If you've got dogs around the place, they're going to lie on the crest, aren't they?

49:57Ian Dennis:Like Billy has. And here's the last one for the glossary this week. It's from Dan in Chester, who says, really enjoyed the radio commentary on the Celtic Rangers match last weekend. I only caught the first half as I had to take my son to play for Waverton Arrows under 13s in their big match against Middlewich Town. but the commentators gave a great phrase when talking about Rangers which I really think deserves a place in your glossary For me I think they're just inviting personally like he says if the last few games are then to go by if you pass the ball back to your goalkeeper Dyson Maeda's not going to give him a minutes piece No and the countless acts of pickpocketry that Dyson Maeda's produced on a regular basis this season are warning enough for the Rangers' defence and goalkeeper not to take a chance when he's around but Fernandes has nicked it off McCown he wanted too long, he's not getting the free kick, it's with Tramiti at the edge of the Celtic box, works themselves their spaces in, chance here, the back post, and it's tucked into the net, Rangers lead, Mikey Moore!

50:58So there we are, Dan's contribution, Liam McLeod, act of pickpocketry, which I quite enjoy,

51:04Ian Dennis:it's quite Dickensian that, isn't it? Particularly given my recent history in Madrid, being the subject of multiple acts of pickpocketry. Dan says he was also hoping to hear a stramash, but no luck with that. And Dan also says, P.S. Waverton Arrows won the game 3-2 with a late curler into the onion bag. One for the cameras. Real Roy of the Rover stuff. And he adds hashtag Justice for John on there as well. So thanks for that, Dan. Oh, my word. I want to go on strike.

51:37Ali Bruce-Ball:On my journey north to Edinburgh midweek, I actually read my Roy the Rovers that I purchased recently.

51:46Ian Dennis:I got in touch with you on the train as you were reading it, didn't I?

51:50Ali Bruce-Ball:Yeah, I got a few funny looks, actually. I don't know whether people wonder whether I worked in the industry. But it was from 1978, and some of the stories and pictures in there were of Tottenham Hotspur playing in the second division, but getting promoted, I think. They went down, didn't they? And then came straight back up again, 77-78. And it was a 78 summer special. But it just made me think, well, you know, given the current situation, that's still to play out this season. Right, that's the glossary done. So the summary as follows. Going down in installments, we think that would be used in other sports.

52:28Ali Bruce-Ball:So Division 2, definitely used for a goalkeeper. Well, and a player when they get fouled or heavily tackled. protected species are scrum halves in rugby are protected I'd be interested to hear from our listeners on protected species actually whether they think there are other positions in world sport that are a protected species I mean they certainly and this is going a wee way back in NFL sort of changed the rules on how you can tackle quarterbacks because you were getting career ending injuries and the star players in the sport were having their careers cut short. But whether they'd still be considered a protected species, don't know.

53:11Ali Bruce-Ball:Don't know. Acts of pickpocketry, chaps.

53:15Ian Dennis:I think that's more of a unique phrase, isn't it, from Liam, rather than something for the glossary.

53:21Ali Bruce-Ball:Yes, I agree. My favourite is head like a sheriff's badge, which has to go into Division I, I think.

53:29Ian Dennis:And I also like head like a biscuit tin. Yes. That should be Division I.

53:39Ali Bruce-Ball:Hooray! Producer Nathan doing the business again. John has asked if Mark in Bulgaria was our first piece of correspondence from Bulgaria. It is not. We have also had an email from Alex from Bulgaria, who now lives in Boston, Massachusetts. So there you go, John.

53:55Ian Dennis:Yeah, and one other thing. Did you watch the video I sent you of the French World Cup squad announcement? Yeah, very good. I very much enjoyed that. But bear in mind, it's the England squad announcement next Friday, and next week's commentator's view will reflect on that. They're the ones that are a nightmare. I would appeal to the FA. What we need is the actual list of the players given to us, rather than trying to work it out from a video like that.

54:25Ali Bruce-Ball:If people haven't seen it, I mean, they'll be able to go and find it. But it's sort of a day in France and players popping up. Mike Maynard sort of picks his own figurine out of a cereal box, doesn't he, that he's got as a gift in a cereal box. It's really good, actually. It also reminds you just how strong that French squad is. Oh, my goodness. Oh, they've got them.

54:47Ian Dennis:It reminds you, the other thing that crossed my mind, though, was did any of the French players who weren't in the squad actually have to get recorded doing something like that? And they're now thinking, what did I do that for?

54:59Ali Bruce-Ball:In the 55-man squad, they put about... 30 that weren't used. That's a great point. Yeah. Very good. Right. Keep the unintended pub names and glossary suggestions coming in, whether you're from Bulgaria, Boston or Bradford, tcv at bbc.co.uk or you can send us a message or voice note on WhatsApp to 08000 289 369. An incredibly dramatic finish coming in the Scottish Premiership title race this weekend. Do not miss that. Ian and John will be commentating on the FA Cup final and what a finish we're going to have in Clash of the Commentators. What a dramatic episode of the Commentators' View this has been.

55:36Ali Bruce-Ball:That is it for this episode of the Football Daily. And remember, you can find each and every episode of the Commentators' View by scrolling down your Football Daily feed.

55:49You know, just one look probably. Didn't even have to adjust one look and you knew that you would let him down. Mamma mia, here I go again. My, my, how can I resist you? So much sport today and all the goals as they go in up and down the league. This is Five Live Sports. It's all ice and the lights and fit to the floor. To ball him. It's not his stopper. Everyone's standing around the 18th green. Overhead kick. That is sensational. He shows to the centre. And go to it. Oh, the right hand and the former champion is down. It's extraordinary stuff. They've put on a show for us tonight. He gets on his knees and kisses the turf.

56:35Five Live Sports. The home of the world's greatest sporting events. This is the full time with them. Listen on BBC Sounds.

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From the publisher

John Murray, Ian Dennis & Ali Bruce-Ball talk Spygate, VAR and look ahead to the FA Cup Final. There’s Clash of the Commentators controversy as ‘CAS’ gets in touch. There are more unintended pub names from sport commentary and suggestions for the Great Glossary of Football Commentary. Messages, questions and voicenotes welcome on WhatsApp to 08000 289 369 & emails to TCV@bbc.co.uk

01:00 Ali been to Scotland for the title race, 03:15 ‘They need to strip back VAR’, 07:55 The return of the Reeces, 10:30 An ABBA earworm from Herr Chapman? 13:50 5 Live commentaries this weekend, 14:55 FA Cup Final date ‘not as it should be’, 18:05 Unintended pub names from commentary, 19:10 Spygate allegations discussion, 29:20 Munchgate reaches a conclusion… 33:55 Can Ian respond in Clash of the Commentators? 40:30 Great Glossary of Football Commentary.

5 Live / BBC Sounds commentaries: Sat 1230 Celtic v Hearts, Sat 1500 Man City v Chelsea in FA Cup Final, Sun 1500 Leeds v Brighton, Sun 1500 Brentford v Crystal Palace on Sports Extra, Sun 1730 Newcastle v West Ham.

Great Glossary of Football Commentary: DIVISION ONE 50p head Agricultural challenge, Back of the net, Back to square one, Backside and elbows, Booked, Bosman, Bullet header, Channel of joy, Coupon buster, Cruyff Turn, Cultured/educated left foot, Dead-ball specialist, Draught excluder, Elastico/flip-flap, False nine, Fox in the box, Giving the goalkeeper the eyes, Grub hunter, Head like a biscuit tin, Head like a sheriff’s badge, Head tennis, Hibs it, In a good moment, In behind, Lollipop, Magic of the FA Cup, Managerless X, The Maradona, Off their line, Olimpico, Onion bag, Panenka, Parachute payment, Park the bus, Perfect hat-trick, Postage stamp, Put his cap on it, Rabona, Roy of the Rovers stuff, Schmeichel-style, Scorpion kick, Spursy, Stick it in the mixer, Sweeper keeper, Taking it to the corner flag, Target man, Tiki-taka, Towering header, Trivela, Where the kookaburra sleeps, Where the owl sleeps, Where the spiders sleep. DIVISION TWO 2-0 can be a dangerous score, Asterisk, Back on the grass, Ball stays hit, Banana skin, Beaten all ends up, Blaze over the bar, Business end, Came down with snow on it, Catching practice, Camped in the opposition half, Cauldron atmosphere, Champagne is on ice, Coat is on a shoogly peg, Come back to haunt them, Corridor of uncertainty, Couldn’t sort their feet out, Easy tap-in, Daisy-cutter, Drop zone, Drubbing, First cab off the rank, Giant-killing, Goalkeepers’ Union, Going down in installments, Good leave, Good touch for a big man, Half-time in the tie, Half-turn, Has that in his locker, High wide and not very handsome, Hospital pass, Howler, In the dugout, In the hat, In their pocket, Johnny on the spot, Lackadaisical, Leading the line, Leather a shot, Mazy run, Middle of the park, Needed no second invitation, Needing snookers, Nice headache to have, No-look pass, Nutmeg, On the beach, On their bike, One for the cameras, One for the purists, Piledriver*, Played us off the park, Points on the board, Points to the spot, Prawn sandwich brigade, Purple patch, Put their laces through it, Queensbury rules, Reaches for their pocket, Relegation six-pointer, Rolls Royce, Root and branch review, Row Z, Screamer, Seats on the plane, Sent into raptures, Show across the bows, Sleeping giant, Slide-rule pass, Staving off relegation, Steal a march, Sting the palms, Straight in the bread basket, Stramash, Taking one for the team, Telegraphed that pass, Tired legs, That’s great… (football), Thunderous strike, Tricky winger, Turning into a cricket score, Turns on a sixpence, Twisted blood, Walk it in, We’ve got a cup tie on our hands, We were right behind that, Yo-yo club.

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