France find a way past Paraguay and what awaits England in Mexico? - World Cup Daily

5 Jul 2026 · 46 min · 23 chapters

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In short

The episode of Guardian Football Weekly covers France vs Paraguay, Morocco vs Canada, and England’s upcoming Round of 16 match vs Mexico in Mexico City altitude.

Guests

  • Barry Glendening (panelist in LA; discusses refereeing, tactics, and England/Mexico).
  • Archie Rintut (panelist; focuses on shithousery ethics and England selection/tactics).
  • Barney (panelist in Mexico City; reports on altitude/storms and England’s game plan).
  • Max (host; moderates and brings in clips/interviews).

Key claims and notable examples

  • France beat Paraguay 1-0 (Mbappé penalty). Paraguay used extreme “shithousery” (time-wasting, fouls, elbows, penalty-spot scraping) and were frustrated by referee Iljiz Tantashev, who booked none of their players. Mbappé “laughed” through it; France stayed controlled and avoided injuries/red cards. Philippe Oclair calls it “taking the piss” and says France controlled the match despite fewer chances.
  • Morocco beat Canada 3-0: Canada pressed early but missed key chances (Jonathan David). Morocco scored via a set piece and two breakaways; Ismail Saibari left with a thigh injury. Jesse Marsh’s “rather be us than them” comments are debated.
  • England vs Mexico: altitude may affect running; England should play a low-block/transition approach. Tuchel’s defensive issues are linked to missing Stones/Maguire/Walker/Trippier and team defensive coordination. Possible wing/CM tweaks include Noni Madueke and Kobi Mainoo.

Written by AI. May contain mistakes. Listen to the episode to check what was said.

Chapters

Tap a time to open that second in VO

France vs Paraguay Overview

0:30 to 0:55

Discussion about France's win over Paraguay and Morocco's performance.

“whistle, Matthias Galazza could have had eight on his own.”

Panel Introductions

0:55 to 1:41

Introducing the panel members and their locations.

“On the panel today with me in LA, Barry Glendening.”

Philippe Auclair's Thoughts

1:41 to 2:03

Philippe shares insights on the match and its peculiarities.

“It was Paraguay's first and only foul of the game.”

Referee Performance and Tactics

2:03 to 4:14

Discussion on the Paraguayan team's tactics and referee's performance.

“Oh, I think we could just keep it at that, just laugh.”

French Team's Performance

4:14 to 6:00

Analysis of France's overall control and performance in the match.

“In a way, there is nothing to show for this game because you think that's a game to get into the quarters of the World Cup.”

Looking Ahead to Morocco

6:00 to 7:12

Discussion on the upcoming match against Morocco and expectations.

“This is the first time that you haven't seen France create buckets.”

Paraguay's Strategy and Manager

7:12 to 8:10

Reflection on Paraguay's strategy and their manager's qualities.

“where you will want to watch that behind the sofa.”

Sportsmanship and Under Dog Narrative

8:10 to 8:51

Debate about sportsmanship and the underdog narrative in football.

“And in a way, it was damage limitation as well.”

Shithousery in Football

8:51 to 14:00

Discussion on the concept of shithousery in football and its implications.

“Philippe Oclair, they're laughing his way through.”

France vs Paraguay: Tactical Insights

14:00 to 18:08

Analyzing France's tactical approach and Paraguay's defensive strategies during the match.

“But still, like, you are opening the door there and the referee doesn't do his job, which is to caution these players.”
Show all 23 chapters

Transition to Morocco vs Canada

18:08 to 18:21

Transitioning to discuss the next match between Morocco and Canada.

“Part two will do Morocco's win against Canada.”

Morocco's Victory Dynamics

18:21 to 21:15

Exploring Morocco's 3-0 victory over Canada and the missed opportunities for Canada.

“I'm actually not sure it was a 3-0 game what did you make of it?”

Jesse Marsh's Coaching Philosophy

21:15 to 24:46

Discussing Jesse Marsh's approach and comments following the match.

“He wants to be ballsy and kind of peppy in defeat, but it seems pretty graceless to me.”

Cultural Reflections on Football

24:46 to 28:06

Delving into the cultural aspects of football, player dynamics, and community sentiments.

“And I think his comment, I'd rather be us than them, has been misconstrued.”

Banter About Thomas Tuchel

28:06 to 28:40

The hosts engage in playful banter comparing Thomas Tuchel to other figures.

Previewing the Upcoming Games

28:41 to 28:57

Discussion shifts to the upcoming football matches, including Brazil and Mexico.

Experiencing the Storm

28:58 to 30:17

A vivid description of a storm encountered by one of the hosts while in Mexico.

England’s Challenges Against Mexico

30:18 to 34:18

In-depth analysis of England's gameplay and challenges against Mexico's altitude.

“um when i got to the hotel i kind of discussed it with the guy there on the desk and he he just said the gods are angry.”

Debating Tactical Changes for England

34:19 to 36:40

Discussion about potential changes in the England squad and tactics for the match.

“on I sort of you know I get the line about 10 minutes before and they were doing you know the phone in what should happen and people ringing up going well you've got to put Declan Rice at centre-back.”

Norway vs. Brazil Preview

36:41 to 38:16

Analyzing the upcoming match between Norway and Brazil, discussing key players.

“Brazil-Norway Barry can you make a case for Norway in this game?”

Memorable Moments and Anecdotes

38:17 to 42:04

Sharing memorable moments from previous matches and personal anecdotes from the hosts.

“in the round of 16, so I'm going to stick with that, even though I'm not massively convinced it's going to happen.”

A Close Call with a Mysterious Stranger

42:04 to 44:29

An amusing and tense encounter in a hotel bar where a potentially dangerous stranger reveals his tattoo.

“It was a man in a kind of Hawaiian shirt with quite a sort of weathered face, like stringy, you know, stringy looking.”

Tattoo Revelations and Friendship

44:30 to 45:31

A light-hearted discussion about tattoos and unexpected connections among friends.

“I was I won't lie, I was very surprised.”
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Transcript

Automatic transcript. May contain errors.

0:00Philippe Auclair:This is The Guardian.

0:30whistle, Matthias Galazza could have had eight on his own. France kept their cool just about, Mbappe laughing his way through it. Ultimately, probably good for football that France made it through. Meanwhile, Morocco looked second best for a lot of the game against Canada, but when it mattered, they took their chances brilliantly and will probably offer a sterner test for France in the next round. We've all climbed a hill so we can give you deep, personal and scientific insights into how England will fare at altitude against Mexico. Happy 4th of July, everyone. This is the Guardian Football Weekly.

1:01On the panel today with me in LA, Barry Glendening. Welcome. Hello, Max. Hello, Archie Rintut. Hey, Max. And just landed in Mexico City. Hey, Barney, how are you? I'm fine, thanks.

1:10Barney Ronay:I managed to survive an incredible electrical storm on the way to my hotel. So it's simply being alive at this point feels like a bonus. Has it made you uh treat every second differently would you say yeah i decided that from now on everything has to be special perfect i'm just going to suck the sweetness out of life which is why i'm i'm here yeah of course what better way to begin uh your the all new party ronay all right let's talk about uh france's win over paraguay first and before i get the panel thoughts i caught up with philippe au clair at full time so okay philippe uh one nil then an Mbappe penalty, the difference.

1:47It was Paraguay's first and only foul of the game. I'm surprised you're not covered in blood, if I'm honest. How was it for you?

2:03Philippe Auclair:Oh, I think we could just keep it at that, just laugh. I've rarely seen anything like this. I honestly I don't know I don't know what to say I'd like to know what the instructions given by Alfaro to his players were you know instead you know we think of managers you know on the training pitch I don't know they rehearse free kicks and corner kicks and transitions and playing 10 v 11 and they must have like special courses like this is how you fall when a player is within two inches of you and you pretend to have been hit in the head. Or this is how you give an elbow to a player. And this is the way you have to do it, the angle you've got to take, so the referee doesn't take you, doesn't see you.

2:56Philippe Auclair:But it's strange, Max. I was absolutely zen-like throughout the whole game. I was just laughing because I couldn't believe what I was saying. This is a shithousery of that level. It's absolutely sensational. But the thing is that the French didn't lose their temper and there was only one. I mean, the way that three-flinch players were booked and no Paraguayan player was booked. You kicked them off the park, Philippe. Yeah, that's what happened. You booted them off the park. It does make you think what the Uzbek League is like with that ref. I know they've been given instructions to let things go, but I thought Paraguay and I'll get into it the lads were an embarrassment on that pitch today yeah they were they were they were embarrassing because they're actually far better footballers than that they obviously thought they had no chance and that the only way they could possibly get something out of this game was to get a French player sent off to foul whenever possible to work the referee who was he was so bad.

4:07Philippe Auclair:The ref was so bad. It was embarrassing. It was an embarrassment, but there was... In a way, there is nothing to show for this game because you think that's a game to get into the quarters of the World Cup. This is probably an opportunity that very few of those Paraguayan players will ever have again in their career. And then they decide to do this with it. That's that's shocking and from the French side I think the positives are like there are no injuries obvious injuries nobody got a red card Dwayne was very good when he came on and you know the penalty which was a penalty for once was he got it because he's he's a super player Lucadini I thought was terrific at left back which I think would probably reassure a little bit other than that it was a game for nothing.

5:07Philippe Auclair:I don't know if it felt that way. I didn't feel engaged in that game that I've been in other games in those knockout rounds because I felt, yeah, France is controlling. No, of course, they're not creating an awful lot, but they will create something at some point. That's fine. And it's just a matter of not being totally stupid and they were not stupid. They controlled that. I think Kylian Mbappe's reactions throughout the whole game, which is basically, I think he spent And the last 45 minutes, just laughing at people, just laughing at them saying, guys, you can't be serious. You really can't be serious.

5:44Philippe Auclair:But, you know, justice was done. And I don't think many people will miss Paraguay, to be honest. It's funny because I love shithouse you, but it gets to a level where you're like, come on, this is ridiculous. I mean, because it could have got dangerous, I think, for the French players. I suppose the only question is, is it a concern? This is the first time that you haven't seen France create buckets. You know, okay, they didn't score until just on halftime against Sweden, but they could have been 10-0 up. Apart from, you know, Hill made that great double save from Mbappe, he made a couple of other decent saves, he didn't really create much.

6:17Does that bother you at all?

6:19Philippe Auclair:No, not really, because I think that when you think that the temperature on the pitch was 37-38, feeling like 40-41. Obviously, this is going to have a big impact on the way the players in the transition. It's going to have a big impact as well. I mean, to be honest, Paraguay, for all the shithousery, as teams playing with a low block are concerned, are as well organized as anybody else. So it was going to be very, very tough to break them down. I think everybody would know that. But I don't feel concerned. I think it was a game for nothing, to be honest. It happened and it didn't happen in the same way.

7:07Philippe Auclair:And next one will be against Morocco, which I think there will be moments where you will want to watch that behind the sofa. I think it's going to be a pretty tough one. but Morocco is a team that plays quite proactive football so we're going to have a completely different game and you'll see again the French team that you've seen before but it also shows Max that the France we saw in the group phase was a France that wasn't playing against top teams basically and against Sweden that was the same Yeah. Senegal, yes, perhaps. And the first half against Senegal was not that great. Then it changed with Olysses coming in the middle, as we know.

7:54Philippe Auclair:Then the other group games, you know, Norway fielded the B team. Sweden afterwards was not defended. So we didn't really know. We still don't know how good or great this French team can be. What they did is that they did what they had to do. And in a way, it was damage limitation as well. because it could have gone bad very, very quickly. And it could have gone bad very, very badly. And it didn't happen. And I always felt they were in control. And I always felt that they had the possibility. It was not one of those where you're sitting at the edge of the seat saying they've got to score, they've got to score, something stupid is going to happen.

8:33Philippe Auclair:No, it didn't feel like that at all. But honestly, I just have to laugh. I've rarely seen anything like this. It's really taking the piss. You're on for the full pod after the Morocco game, so we will chat to you then. But merci beaucoup, au revoir, felicitations. Bonne nuit à toi, Max. Philippe Oclair, they're laughing his way through. What was, I mean, Barry, the BBC called Paraguay stubborn, which feels generous to me.

9:03Max Rushden:Yes, they are a very obdurate team. Well, to be fair, there was a lot of pearl clutching on the BBC after the game. Joe Hart in particular I love Joe Hart as a pundit but Joe Hart was particularly exercised by the Paraguayans' shithouse tactics and said he would hate to win that way and he would hate if any players on a team of his played that way and I suppose he has a point if everyone played like that no one would watch football but when one team plays like it and it's your stereotypical team of South American underdogs. It's kind of funny, for a while anyway. But yeah, they got away with murder from the Uzbekistan referee, Iljiz Tantashev, who somehow got through the game without booking any Paraguayan players.

10:02Max Rushden:I think he booked one of their coaching staff. And as you said in your intro, Galarza Matthias Galarza my god what an awful bastard it's just incredible but he was at everything and really he was really trying to wind up the French players and he did it up to a point he was then I think when he realised the jig was up towards the end of the game and Paraguay had stopped actually trying to pull a goal back in so much as they ever did try to score he was just focusing all his attention on getting Kylian Mbappe sent off, and Mbappe was having none of it, was just laughing in his face. But Michael Elisse was getting very wound up among other French players, but him in particular.

10:48Max Rushden:But the Paraguayans, they time-wasted, they fouled, they threw elbows, there was a couple of rugby-style palms off in the face of French players. They argued with the referee, they argued with their French players, they kicked, shins, they elbowed, just the whole gamut of shithousery. And while I commend their performances in getting this far, even though that game against Australia will live long in my memory for all the wrong reasons, I'm not sorry to see the back of them. No, that feels like enough. It did remind me, Barney, of Sunday league games I played in when they beat the living shit out of you.

11:32At the end of the game, they go, good battle, mate. but there will be no greater feeling for that than being in that dressing that french dressing

11:39Barney Ronay:room after you have beaten a team like that yeah i mean i guess so um i i saw them against germany in boston paraguay um and they are a good team you know they can play and i guess this was a decision how do you combat france's attack well there's one way um i i really like um i really like their manager i'm sad to see him leave the world cup gustavo alfaro there's been a kind of phenomenon this world cup last night i was at capa verde um in miami and um the wonderful bubista walked in at the end to talk about his players and there's this kind of serene gloomy man trope of these managers i mean alfaro is a 63 year old argentine he's managed everywhere and they talk in quite simple terms about being proud and dignity and being warriors and all this kind of stuff but they're kind of nice men and they they clearly love the game and they're kind of a nice antidote to um i would include don carlo and celotti in that as well sort of old old men who you wouldn't mind just sort of seeing next to at a bar or kind of you know being in a lift with because they just raise an eyebrow and they're kind of a nice antidote to the shoutiness of the rest of the World Cup.

12:55Barney Ronay:So I'm sad to see him go. And Bubista was fantastic. I love Bubista. And if Bubista's listening or watching and would like to be my dad... Archie, you made a good point with this. We are so conditioned to support the underdog. And at the start of the game, you're like, I hope Paraguay win. But they just got so filthy. I think it's the scuffing the penalty spot that just does my... Literally, when the penalty came in and every Paraguay player walked to the penalty spot and the ref was just like, go away. and another one would just walk up. You're never getting a yellow card out that you sort of eventually, you sort of think this would be a footballing crime if France didn't get through it.

13:33Do you remember the goodwill that Paraguay earned from the world when they beat Germany? Yeah. And everybody was thinking, wow, great for Paraguay. Look at them, they've got their own national holiday. I think that in France, that has been extinguished at least. And you mentioned the scraping of the penalty spot. I've seen Julio Enciso Scraping away the referees Vanishing foam during this game I showed you a clip from German TV Which they'd found where When Mike Maignon is trying to launch a quick A quick counter attack Suddenly from behind him Juan Caceres just falls on top of him And you can see that Caceres Has been walking fine before that And he's just absolutely Tanked it on top of him

14:16Barney Ronay:You don't find any of this funny at all oh it's hilarious maybe more obsessed with the rules it's seen as you know it's clever football's a game where you try to kind of dodge in and out of the rules slightly in some other football cultures I suppose the question is is does it get to a line where you might injure one of their players and I don't know if they it felt to me like not by scratching the penalty spot I don't know why that really pisses me off it just really pisses me off usually I enjoy shithousery as well I just felt that there was a line where it started to move into thuggery when when Galassa hits Mbappe there and you can say, oh, you know, but it's not hitting him in a point of the body where it's going to really hurt.

14:57But still, like, you are opening the door there and the referee doesn't do his job, which is to caution these players. And that's what leads to this continuation of that in the second half. I don't know. It just fell the wrong side of my humour lines for the most part. I mean, I ended up just laughing in disbelief by the end of the game. And I thought it was interesting that Didier Deschamps has said after the game that he was remembering when they won the World Cup in 2018 and how they had a game against Uruguay and he had to take off Kylian Mbappe. And he said that he asked two of the toughest players on the bench to protect him at the end of the game because he doesn't want to lose him to anything more.

15:39Kylian Mbappe was speaking about how, look, they thought that we were going to turn up here in tuxedos, but we showed that we could play dirty football too. It is a great victory for France because we've seen a completely different side of them at this tournament so far. And I think they're going to walk out of this game with a different kind of confidence to them now because they've shown that they can stand up for each other and not take the bait. I think it just gave me PTSD of playing Finchley away or Garchonians away or Hume away in Melbourne and just thinking I don't want to have my legs broken today but but um can I make an interesting

16:18Barney Ronay:comparison please in 86 England played Paraguay in Mexico and famously the guy who was marking Gary Lineker hit him so hard in the throat with his arm the Lineker couldn't speak for the rest of the half um and he actually made a he made a kind of call liniker afterwards said um i don't think he meant it i don't i don't want to think he didn't and it like obviously a terrible thing to do and that's no one should be doing that but england won 3-0 and it it kind of made me really like gary liniker and kind of admire he scored two goals in that game and england won and he he was very gentlemanly about that and i kind of thought it made me it ennobled the game and made me think that was kind of cool so maybe with the passing of time yeah we'll look back on this and

17:01Max Rushden:think it was yeah maybe i mean i think in this game at halftime we're all going paraguay well done you've frustrated them um i don't think did did france even have a shot on target in the first half and i think hill's first save was a kono shot from 25 yards i mean the second half right okay and you're going yeah you set out to frustrate and shake house and spoil and you've done exactly that and so well done because you're not as good at France you know everyone knows that it's the highest ranked team in the competition against the lowest ranked team left in the competition I think and then they go a goal down they continue this approach and they're getting dirtier and dirtier and they go a goal down and suddenly there's like 7 minutes left and they're not trying to score an equaliser it's as if They didn't quite, I know they scoffed at the penalty spot.

17:57Max Rushden:This is as if they hadn't realised, oh, we actually need to score a goal here. All their attention was just on winding up various French players. Yeah, and they did it, but not well enough. All right, that'll do for part one. Part two will do Morocco's win against Canada.

18:19Welcome to part two of the Guardian Football Weekly. So Morocco are through. They beat Canada 3-0. I'm actually not sure it was a 3-0 game what did you make of it? Canada were on top in the first half and that was the way they had to approach this game because if Morocco were to make a first a fast start and get ahead then I don't think Canada would have had a chance so the strategy call from Jesse Marsh made sense the problem was the problem for Canada at this tournament where they've not been able to take all their chances at the right time and there was that moment where Jonathan David had the chance to hit it when there was a great piece of build-up with Oluwasei and he just doesn't go for it and you see a certain fragility in Jonathan David's confidence still even though he had that hat-trick against Qatar he's just not quite making the right decisions at the right times for a striker where you just want to bank on your instinct and fair play to Morocco whilst they were overrun in the first half they only had one touch in the Canada box.

19:20They didn't panic. And these are the two sprintiest teams in the tournament left. So we shouldn't have been surprised by the intensity which there was. And even if Bono had to come to the rescue as well with one big save, let's not underestimate that they lost Ismail Saibari to a thigh injury. We've seen Mohamed Uwabi, the Morocco coach, say we're going to have a look in a few days. It seemed a slight injury, which they'll really hope for. But this was some adversity that Morocco had to come through and that they score a kind of goal where as a defending team you are furious that it's that easy to score but as the attacking team you look quite smart.

20:02It's a really lovely finish from Azzedine Unai and from there they didn't really relinquish control of the game. Yeah, the finishing was great for Morocco.

20:10Max Rushden:Yeah, because they didn't have many chances but the ones they did get they put away which is what Canada were unable to do and ultimately cost them. First goal, free kick, nicely worked set piece. Zerouani received a pass from Hakimi, I think it was, and just drilled this low shot through traffic into the bottom corner. And then the second two were brilliantly executed breakaway goals and they almost got another one, identical. By the time they were 3-0 up, I think they'd only had three shots on target and they scored all three of them. and that one obviously doesn't count as a shot on target despite what Troy Townsend would have you believe.

20:51After the game, Jesse Marsh said there was one team on the pitch. He said that of their start to the game at least. We were better than the number seven team in the world. I'd rather be us than them. I mean, I quite like Jesse Marsh, Barney. I think he's done well for Canada. It's their most successful men's World Cup campaign. They got their first point, their first win, their first group stage, progression first knockout victory. How do you feel about Jesse? Fair enough.

21:16Barney Ronay:He wants to be ballsy and kind of peppy in defeat, but it seems pretty graceless to me. Why would you say that? I think the right thing to do is to congratulate your opponent. But Morocco are a really good team. I quite want them to win the World Cup. I think they'll give France a really good game. They're kind of a fascinating team. I mean, they have so many players who've come through Ajax, through the French football machine, through Belgium as well, you know, who are Moroccans. And you can sort of call that a diaspora team if you want, but it's not, you know, there's a reason why there are Moroccan people in those countries, and it's not because Morocco has chosen that to happen to them.

21:57Barney Ronay:I like the way this World Cup is kind of piecing nations back together like a jigsaw in that way and telling you stories about them. And that's quite an American thing in a country of immigrants and people who've moved around the place. I think they're really, I would think it would be such an interesting thing if Morocco to actually win the World Cup, which I really don't think is impossible. It's not impossible. I think that would be really fascinating and really hard for Donald Trump to kind of compute as well, which I'd quite enjoy. This is definitely not in his kind of, well, I think he has a script, does he?

22:30Barney Ronay:But it's definitely not in his kind of fevered dreams. Yeah, I think they're really good. And I'd rather be them, I think, than Canada. Sure. That's an interesting point. I thought this was actually, especially their first half, was actually their least impressive performance so far. Possibly. I mean, Canada have a brilliant pressing system. They're a really well-drilled team. They've done really well. He's managed them really well. They've really competed really well at this World Cup. They're really disciplined and they're really well coached. And he maybe showed a way to play against possession teams like that if you're willing to really press like that.

23:06Barney Ronay:And that was good. But they still won 3-0. and you know they are I guess champions of Africa if we want to say that although I'm not really sure why that one ended up that if you can win 3-0 when a team has kind of slightly tactically got to you I think you're doing okay and they'll feel pretty good about it I think. The main thing for Jesse Marsh is that his players believe him and his players buy into it but it's difficult on the outside to buy into everything he says for example yesterday Max in an interview he was talking about the U.S. men's national team job where he said people like to say oh he wishes he coached the national team let me make it really clear I will never coach the U.S.

23:50national team ever and that's no problem there was the possibility of me at one point but I'm done with it I don't even care anymore do you believe him I don't know I mean he may never

24:02Max Rushden:coached the US men's national team but I'm not sure it will be his decision he said after this game I'd rather be us than them, I'd rather be Canada than Morocco and he's getting pelters with this but he seems to be very unpopular in the United States that's the vibe I'm getting and someone admittedly he was just some bloke in a bar was telling me but you know absolutely that's journalism I've picked up some of my... Yeah, they're your sources. Yeah. Some bloke in a bar said that he really wanted the US job. He didn't get it. And now he more or less took the Canada job as a bit of an FU to the States.

24:47Max Rushden:And I think his comment, I'd rather be us than them, has been misconstrued. I don't think he was saying Canada were better than Morocco because we clearly weren't. They lost 3-0 and it could have been worse. I think he was just, I prefer our team's spirit, I prefer my players, and I prefer the vibe we have in our camp. And, you know, say if Arsenal went out and hammered Sunderland in a match, I would still rather be a Sunderland fan than an Arsenal fan. I'd add to what Barry's saying that this is not to take away from the job that Jesse Marsh has done. When you consider that Alphonso Davies has missed basically the entirety of this tournament, I think if you told Canadians that four years ago, that they'd have to go through this home tournament without him.

Read the full transcript

25:35Kone as well, missing a lot of it. It's a really good achievement and that he's brought everyone together and pushing in the right direction. Can Canada go beyond the last 16 at the next World Cup? It depends on the draw. It doesn't look like they have the players to consistently go further like Morocco have gone on to do. what was lacking was technical quality today but yeah just a bit of sadness as well for Alphonso Davies that his career was meant to have been building to this moment and in the end when Jesse Marsh asked him before this game do you have enough in the tank to play the answer was an honest no.

26:09A journalist did say at the end to Jesse Marsh we want to thank you for making us dream before we never believed we'd ever make it this far so we just want to say thank you. Will you say that to Thomas Tuchel if England win the World Cup Barney in a presser thank you for making us dream

26:26Barney Ronay:Thomas Tuchel has already made me dream this is the post storm Barney we all wanted I really like Thomas Tuchel one of my favourite things about him at the moment is there's a whole thing on mum's net of kind of quite flushed and slightly thirsty mums talking about how they find him incredibly attractive. And it's seen as a guilty pleasure. I shouldn't, I don't want to, but I can't stop looking. And he's been described as a kind of a vampire, as an undernourished vagrant. But there's a whole thing on Mumsnet. And to be honest for the for the vampiric boggle-eyed germanic community so often marginalizing that kind of discussion it's a really good thing it's great to be i feel seen yeah i feel appreciated i would normally go into a kind of thing about impossible beauty standards and it's really good to have like but this is actually an impossible beauty standard you think it's easy to look like this it takes a huge amount of work um so thomas thomas has been great for for the whole community of of us guys who are kind of 53 years old and have boggle eyes and don't like that we all want

27:51Max Rushden:to belong as you found your place how do you know this is on mom's net somebody sent it to me who

27:59Barney Ronay:has been joking about tucall's attractiveness and saying this could be good for you um so is that your wife no he was a friend but um i do get england fans now walk past me and shout thomas tucall oh that's i'm that guy i have to do the kind of banter along with you prefer that or donald tusk or niles crane what's your favorite oh it's much better than tusk nobody thought tusk was tusk was not sexy tusk was powerful right but it's incredibly flattering tucall used to be a model when he was a younger man he's an incredibly handsome man so i i am not saying that i look like Thomas Tuchel but I'm very very happy to be swept up the whole community is happy to be swept up in his aura we have a leader now all right that'll do for part two part three we'll look ahead to the game or just do more on Parnie's new job as a Thomas Tuchel look-alike

28:58welcome to part three the Guardian Football Weekly so tomorrow Brazil Norway and Mexico england you're in mexico has the altitude affected your broad i mean it doesn't sound like it has um it's been one of your finest performances to date um but uh what are your general thoughts on

29:12Barney Ronay:the game well um i'm trying to save myself from problems with altitude by not doing any exercise or moving fast and so far it's working i can confirm that the storm stuff um they're not mucking about about that i i i was in a taxi coming from the airport about two hours ago and the traffic was so bad i mean it was kind of it seemed to be raining outside but the traffic was terrible so i said look i'm just gonna get out and walk i walked the last mile and i've never seen a storm like it it was incredible i walked through this storm you know when you're just instantly drenched like trousers just sticking to your leg i had my trusty um cagoule on but forget that no no function whatsoever um it was like being in one of those vampire films where there is literally like really really kind of clear forked lightning directly over your head accompanied by really loud i've never seen anything like it i was really quite scared luckily i had my trusty metal hat on yeah good so everything was was fine keeping the rain off but no it was it was amazing they're not joking about these storms that was a really really frightening for the streets flooded i was stuck in an underpass for a while it was very exciting um when i got to the hotel i kind of discussed it with the guy there on the desk and he he just said the gods are angry.

30:28Barney Ronay:And then he said, are you Thomas Tuchel? To the game itself, I mean, altitude, however many journalists have done at 5K to say it's harder to run altitude, it is true. Like, it will be difficult for England. It will change how they play. I wonder, do you think they should play a sort of Jose Conte low block type thing in this game? Well, I think they should do that anyway. I don't think this is a game to be, there's so many things wrong with this England team there are combinations that aren't working and Tuchel has spoken about this he hasn't solved the problems with his wide players at all he doesn't know who goes with who who's playing well but there's lots wrong the central midfield is lacking that sort of well it just doesn't have that shielding player that they need so lots of things to fix but this is not the game to fix them it's a get in and get out game and the one thing I said this in my preview the one thing England so far they've picked a team to run into spaces and to counter-attack and to be quick on the transition that's the whole plan and they've played teams who don't want them to do that who said we're going to have a low block and you you must break us down I don't think Mexico will be able to do that in the Azteca where the energy is a really big advantage to them if they attack England it will at least I'm not saying this is going to make England win the game it might make them lose it 3-0 but it will at least give them something which reflects the game plan they're expecting to have to enact.

31:49Barney Ronay:I think I fancy England a bit more than most people. I've got a feeling they might score from a corner and it might be one of those and the atmosphere might be more of a problem for Mexico than them. I mean, English players, whatever they are, they're not the greatest team in the world, but they are used to playing in stadiums where there's a lot of pressure and things like that. I think this might be their best game of the World Cup, I think.

32:14Max Rushden:Barney, I remember years ago, I make a careful note of everything you say on the podcast so I can use it against you at a later date. But we were talking about some team or other not being able to sort out the defence, probably Spurs. And someone made a point, well, it's a really difficult thing to do. And you made the quite salient point that Thomas Tuchel arrived at Chelsea when they were in disarray and sorted out their defence in an afternoon. Why hasn't he been able to do the same thing with England, do you think?

32:44Barney Ronay:I think because it's different he would really like to have John Stones he's lost a whole defence from the Southgate era he's not got Stones he's not got Maguire he just doesn't think is going to work he's lost two fullbacks in Walker and Trippier and probably some other players I've forgotten about and the people who've come in have made mistakes and haven't looked that great and also defence is a team thing when he was at Chelsea he just drilled them and drilled them and drilled them and he had some good players there it's not like that in this job um he's had 18 months and some quite bitty games and players coming and going and i'm not making excuses for him it just hasn't worked um the way he would like it to and i think i think the defense comes from the entire team for example the goal that um jed spence was kind of seemed to be at fault because he got drawn into the middle for the goal against um dr congo um that really if you watch that whole move that came from the midfield the guy he was tracking was a midfielder who england's midfield had not tracked he'd made a forward run so spencer was drawn into that as he should because he's the man there which left this huge gap over there and jed's the reason they the tv did a close-up of declan rice shouting at people after that was partly because well where were you Declan and probably someone was shouting at him I think he probably felt oh that's my man and it's a team defense thing and Tuchel doesn't really have the players hasn't been able to get his team defense thing into them in the same way um for whatever reason yeah Archie what do you I mean I I was on TalkSport this morning and um so I flicked on I sort of you know I get the line about 10 minutes before and they were doing you know the phone in what should happen and people ringing up going well you've got to put Declan Rice at centre-back.

34:32Rhys James, if he's not fit, doesn't matter, get him in centre-mid and you're going, oh God, we can't have this. And really, there aren't that many changes that Tuchel can make, right? I would personally keep Gei in concert centre-back. I think it's a bigger risk to bring Stones in and then I think Quanchum, Gerald Quanchum might be fit so you could play him at right-back. But otherwise, I would keep the back four and really, you've got to keep the centre-mid. You've got to keep Kane. So it's just who you start on the wing, I think. But maybe you think they could be bigger changes? No. I'm with Barney on the right winger combination needing to be found but I think that can also be a game by game thing.

35:11Noni Madueke is going to be really important for how much he stretches the Mexican left hand side and how much running they're going to have to do because England are going to have to counter them when it comes to them tiring us out. Julian Quinonez has looked excellent so far in this tournament. How England and how Tuchel make a plan for that will be key to succeeding in this game as well. If it was down to any changes in the team, I'd look at Kobi Mainu as a potential one in the centre of midfield. For who? I was doing something really fun that you would love to do, Max, which was looking at Declan Rice's running numbers in the Champions League.

35:50And he's running actually a kilometre less than he was in some of Arsenal's Champions League games towards the end of the season right now. And when you have neural pain in your hamstrings, we saw it with Ismail Saibari, the top sprinter at this tournament with Morocco. Was it a surprise that his leg went twang at some point when you're trying to do that amount of high intensity running? And how much of Declan Rice's game is based on energy and how much he gets about the place? And Kobi Mainu had an excellent second half of the season for Manchester United. Had similar success for England actually coming in halfway through the tournament as well.

36:24I think it needs to be considered as an option because in a tournament as long as this where you are being challenged as much physically you are going to have to make a difficult call at some point it would be a huge call I think way to do it ahead of this game at the Azteca Brazil-Norway Barry can you make a case for Norway in this game?

36:45Max Rushden:I think I can make a case for both of them to be honest here we are your honour yeah I'll sit resolutely on the fence Brazil are quite obviously very susceptible to high balls over the top and that is Norway's game plan. I'm making it sound more prehistoric or Jurassic than it actually is. But I think Brazil could play right into Norway's hands. In Erling Haaland, which is a case to be made for Norway winning on his own, But in Haaland and Sorlos, Norway have two big lads who are physical handfuls, very good in the air. And that's what Japan were missing in their game against Brazil. And I believe Norway sort of have a bit of a hoodoo on Brazil insofar as they've played each other four times.

37:43Max Rushden:And Brazil have never beaten them. So whatever, if that counts for anything, probably not. and then obviously Brazil are very good at football they have Vinicius Junior they have Carlo Ancelotti in charge and they seem to be growing into themselves with each passing game in this tournament so I'm really looking forward I'm looking forward to both games tomorrow I think the England-Mexico one is going to be a great football occasion whatever the outcome I did say before the tournament started I thought England would lose against Mexico in the round of 16, so I'm going to stick with that, even though I'm not massively convinced it's going to happen.

38:25Max Rushden:But fingers crossed. And then this one, this is quite a great curtain raiser. This is, yeah, I'd give Norway a good chance. Just to add to your point on Mexico there, just to give a little peek behind the curtain before we started recording, I just quietly heard Barry going, Mexico, Mexico. Barney, you mentioned you were at the Argentina-Cape Verde game, which the game of the tournament so far and you know the the sydney lopez cabral goal was just unbelievable i just wanted like your reaction watching it there live uh yeah i mean that was

38:59Barney Ronay:an amazing moment and we were quite close to it um in the press box and i was there with pablo um our u.s colleague yeah um we'd got increasingly gripped by this game we both started off on a cabra this can be about messy isn't it let's just see how much messy should we do shall i lead on Messi how much Messi had all this kind of things I wanted to say about Messi and that just quickly evaporated and when that goal went in I mean it was it was can I just say it's lovely to be hugged yeah it's lovely to feel to feel arms around you um and you know Pablo is a lovely man and he smells nice so that that was really lovely and it was great because he was down below us so we got a full view of him going to see the woman who either was his wife's girlfriend or is now or was just someone he'd also spotted on the camera and thought well there's like a nice person I've talked to if I score an incredible guy I think I'll go up there and and she did uh very willingly come over and give him a hug so um yeah that that was an amazing moment and what a goal you know it was it was Josemar-esque um and they were they were fantastic they really were what a team what kind of spirit they have and I've mentioned already Bubista and my deep um quite emotional feelings for for serene gloomy men who seem to have the world in a kind of fairly decent balance and he was really nice afterwards again in contrast to Jesse Marsh first thing he said was congratulations to Argentina they showed why they are world champions um and then talked about his pride in his own team so it was a really wholesome occasion um and I enjoyed it a lot it would be

40:40Max Rushden:absolutely sensational if that woman was just some randomer that sydney cabral had spotted on the jumbotron swipe right that's what he's gonna do she didn't look that bothered did she she was like i'm almost like what are you doing like this is the middle of the game um uh bionny you promised us an anecdote about the mafia in miami are you safe i am safe um i just like to make that no it

41:06Barney Ronay:was just people sometimes wonder what it's like traveling around these places and you have some odd this felt like a bookend do you remember when owen gibson and i were kidnapped in manaus in the in brazil 2014 in a taxi and i was supposed to be doing the pod and i had to kind of phone up and say i'm i'm in a taxi with i'm in a car with some some men and everything's fine and and they were they were off to some sort of shady shady place that they were wanted to take us to it was it kind of felt slightly like that and there was a basically i i traveled about eight hours from atlanta to miami um it'd been a really long day i've been at game the night before checked into my hotel i really wanted to watch the end of portugal croatia which was just entering extra time right at the end it was really tight i rushed into the bar i kind of a hotel had my suitcase with me and i just ordered a drink so i could sit down and and a guy next to me i just heard a voice insisting that i sit down have a drink with him in a kind of thick um accent and i asked i'm fine and I just want to watch this game.

42:05Barney Ronay:No, I'm fine. And he kept insisting. And then I looked down. It was a man in a kind of Hawaiian shirt with quite a sort of weathered face, like stringy, you know, stringy looking. You know, you're thinking Paulie Walnuts-ish. So I ignored him for a bit. And then he said to me, I heard him saying, I'm Sicilian. And he started whispering something about Cosa Nostra. You need to show some respect. And I kind of thought, I said, yeah, it's fine. I looked at him and I thought, this I've been around football a lot people always talk about things that's never really real so I kind of went yeah yeah I'm sure you I'm sure you are I'm sure you are why and and he wouldn't stop he'd been drinking rum quite clearly from his glass he wouldn't sort of stop talking about it and he started showing me the tattoo on his ankle um which he said was a Cosa Nostra tattoo and he says he said you should be careful who you talk to around here and I looked at it and I thought yeah it's a tattoo and i wasn't really in that vibe so actually i said oh yeah well look at that that's uh le parapouille de cherbourg catherine denuve um great film reminds me of a really nice time i had in the north of france once and at which point he wouldn't he kind of didn't like that at all and he suddenly there was mention of people being shot in the back of the head um okay and and i i kind of thought i was looking i was thinking what what are the chances that some random cosanostra connected man is going to be hanging around drinking rum in a hotel where in miami and then i thought well maybe the chances aren't as small as i maybe that's that is where they they end up but the problem was the game so now i switched completely to kind of would you like me to buy you a drink can we can we be friends i don't want to be murdered not i don't even know who's going to reach the final i don't know what's going to happen here yet not the moment to be murdered but i was watching the time go down thinking i need to get out of here i need to watch this game i don't want to panic so i was thinking there's only four minutes left now like it's going to be over i can go to my room and escape um so when that goal was vired off which prevented it from going to extra time which most people saw as an injustice there was a man in a hotel bar that man being me privately punching the air thinking i get to live now because the game will now finish and i'll get to to run away so i said very politely thank you very much for the drink um it's really nice to meet you and ran off to the to the lift and i haven't seen him since i did look over my shoulder a lot whenever i was in the car park because there were lots of big kind of lincoln continentals around and things like that um but i seem to be okay maybe he thought you were thomas tuchel right that's that's the problem for the tape uh barney uh lifted his sleeve to reveal a tattoo of three umbrellas if you weren't entirely sure just for the uh the listening audience i only

44:49Max Rushden:discovered Barney has ink I think on our first or second day here. I've known Barney. I was I won't lie, I was very surprised. Right, okay.

45:00Barney Ronay:Well I think they're lovely Barney. Well thanks, I mean you know people do this as a kind of personal I'm glad that you think they're lovely and I did think Barry was going to say on our first or second date when he took his shirt off. But I'm really meant to talk about that Barry. I know. The long text he said saying listen I just think we should be friends it must have been a real letdown but look maybe you'd be lucky in love some other time that'll do for today thanks everybody thank you Archie cheers Barry enjoy the game tomorrow Football Weekly is produced by Rory Simon and Matt Bentley Viney our executive producer is Joel Grove and we'll be back tomorrow

45:41this is The Guardian

From the publisher
Max Rushden is joined by Barry Glendenning, Archie Rhind-Tutt, Barney Ronay and Philippe Auclair as France beat a spiky Paraguay side to reach the quarter-finals. Help support our independent journalism at theguardian.com/footballweeklypod. Watch us on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@FootballWeeklyPodcast

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