In short
A “Happy Hour” bonus episode recapping day 1–2 chaos at the 2026 French Open in Paris—extreme heat, scheduling, crowd moments, and major upsets reshaping both men’s and women’s draws.
Guest backgrounds
No formal guests are introduced; the hosts are the main voices (Matt, David, Catherine, plus occasional references to others like Charlie and Ava Wallace). They attend Roland Garros and report from courts/press areas.
Key claims
Heat/stress could derail top seed Yannick Sinner; multiple matches were marathon-length and full of deciding-set tiebreaks; Djokovic’s loss and Sinner’s implosion (heat-related) open the men’s draw; for women, Sabalenka’s collapse and Maja Kvalinska’s run are headline shocks.
Notable examples
Sinner losing after leading 5-2 in the third; Djokovic eliminated by 19-year-old Joao Fonseca (after two sets to love down); “watery shits” incident involving Arta Gea; “Sneezegate” fake sneeze during a serve; Maja Kvalinska becoming first qualifier to reach a French Open final; Irina Sabalenka imploding vs Diana Schneider.
Written by AI. May contain mistakes. Listen to the episode to check what was said.
Chapters
Tap a time to open that second in VOAnalyzing Yannick Sinner's Challenges
0:00 to 0:44
Discussion on potential challenges facing Yannick Sinner in the tournament.
“Tell me who could possibly beat Yannick Sinner in that top half of the draw.”
Experiences at the Orangerie
1:00 to 2:36
The hosts share their experiences and observations from the Orangerie.
“Yeah, I'll be carrying personal vinegar with me for the rest of this trip.”
Women’s Draw Insights
2:36 to 4:30
Discussion about the women’s draw and related tennis events.
“We'll stop midway through to have a chat about some Olympic canoeing.”
The Weather and Player Reactions
4:30 to 7:19
Hosts discuss the weather forecast and players’ reactions to it.
“I just want to see where he's at and see, honestly, see how he, like, now the tennis players are talking about breakups and how that affects, like, focus and everything.”
Tennis Match Highlights
7:19 to 11:39
Recap of notable matches and player performances at the tournament.
“We were talking last night, what's more on the rise?”
Press Conference Discussions
11:39 to 14:00
Discussion regarding press conference remarks from players.
“On every walk to and from Roland Garros, there is a point at which conversation lulls.”
Heat Impact on Players
14:00 to 14:39
Discussion on how heat affects players' performance in matches.
“Look, I've got Billie Jean King on my side.”
Match Analysis: Sinner vs. Surundalo
14:40 to 16:49
Analyzing the upcoming match between Yannick Sinner and Juan Manuel Surundalo.
“You know, Medvedev's gone from those possibilities as well.”
Tennis Fashion and Player Attitudes
16:50 to 19:24
Exploration of players' attitudes towards fashion in tennis.
“That is quite something for Beryl to go from playing Pagula, who I would say probably has the lowest trajectory over the net, to Olin O 'Kova, who I think has the highest trajectory over the net.”
The Drop Shot Dragon Reunion
19:25 to 24:49
A humorous recount of a memorable encounter with a former player.
“And, yeah, trying to react to all of that and put it all together in one day is just difficult.”
Show all 22 chapters
Shock Upset: Djokovic's Loss
24:50 to 25:55
Discussion on the unexpected loss of Novak Djokovic and its implications.
“Someone's looking really snappy out there.”
Fan Reactions and Atmosphere
25:56 to 28:00
Highlights of fan reactions and the atmosphere during matches.
“who this evening recovered from two sets to love down to defeat the 24-time major champion Novak Djokovic.”
Privacy Towel at Roland Garros
28:00 to 29:00
Discussing the introduction of privacy towels for players receiving treatment on court.
“I think we've got time before I reach a Grand Slam third round.”
Tournament Upsets and Match Highlights
29:00 to 31:30
Analyzing the surprising results and lengthy matches from the French Open.
“The regardless of who makes them is bait.”
Sneezegate and Player Reactions
31:30 to 34:00
Exploring the incident of a fake sneeze during a crucial match and its aftermath.
“and someone in the crowd very loudly fake sneezes.”
Flavio Caballi's Unique Challenges
34:00 to 36:40
A look at Flavio Caballi's performance and physical challenges during the tournament.
“Matt, the most spectacular tennis you've seen since the last time you watched Joao Fonseca play.”
Weather Impacts and Shocking Defeats
36:40 to 39:20
Discussing how weather influenced matches and the shocking defeat of Irina Sabalenka.
“He has the powers to revive himself from the dead.”
Maja Kvalinska’s Historic Achievement
39:20 to 42:00
Celebrating Maja Kvalinska becoming the first qualifier to reach the Roland Garros final.
“Sabalenka beaten from a set and 5-3 up by Russian 25th seed Diana Schneider.”
Press Conference Insights
42:00 to 44:35
Discover the absurdities and highlights from a recent press conference.
“They're doing a press conference together.”
Zverev's Triumph at the French Open
44:35 to 45:51
Learn about Alexander Zverev's journey to becoming a Grand Slam champion.
“And we now know that the answer is yes, he could and he did.”
Childhood Pets and Personal Stories
45:51 to 47:29
Hear personal anecdotes about pets and childhood memories from the hosts.
“there's nobody quite like David Whittaker to kick a man when he's down.”
A Complicated Relationship with Cats
47:29 to 48:06
Explore the hosts' humorous and complicated relationships with cats.
“We just We had this really great relationship And then yeah Just went our separate ways a little bit Not helped by me once throwing a VHS in frustration at a last minute equaliser being conceded.”
Transcript
Automatic transcript. May contain errors.0:02Tell me who could possibly beat Yannick Sinner in that top half of the draw. I think the element here is stress. Could Sinner get stressed and could that have a physical reaction on his body if it's hot as well? There are elements here which could diminish Yannick Sinner. And I'm not trying to disparage men's tennis. These players are going to throw their hearts into it and maybe somebody can cause an upset, but it's really hard to see one.
0:44Hello and welcome to Paris. We have made it, we're here. I have already been brought vinaigrette in a bistro when I'd asked the waiter for vinegar. We are so back. Turned up with something that was nothing like it and Matt and I rejoiced. Catherine laughed in his face. Yeah, I'll be carrying personal vinegar with me for the rest of this trip. David checked out a bit of qualifying on Longlen early. In fact, he sacrificed lunch for it, which Matt thought was chaotic behaviour. Four minutes I'd been here before I was on Longlen. And then I was the only one in the press seats, by the way. Literally just me in about 100 seats.
1:27Everyone else was alone, David. That's right. It is time now to head to the Orangerie, which is exactly what we three did at 1.45pm. Not early enough to get a seat on the first few rows. We were fairly near the front. We thought they were decent seats. In fact, they were obstructed view seats and should have been sold at a significant discount. A huge plinth, two trophies and some men in the way. So many men. Somehow the plinth was also in the way if you were watching via YouTube. So that was a problem. I mean, I found out the bottom eighth of the women's draw about an hour after it happened, because I couldn't see it live.
2:15So that was a bit of a disaster. Honestly, you and your standard, you expect to actually see the thing. I know. Outrageous, right? In fact, the only female that spoke during the entirety of the draw was Coco Gough, and that conversation ended with a plea for her to smile. Let's start with the women. We'll stop midway through to have a chat about some Olympic canoeing. That's how things roll out here.
2:45I know which one you want to talk about, Matt. Svitolina Bondar? Yeah. Oh, my God. In fact, today was almost the day that Matt had to go to player press conferences wearing sunglasses. Yeah, in the words of someone who won this tournament 14 times, I did a disaster this morning and spent half an hour on my hands and knees looking for my glasses. Gone mad before the tournament's even started. I also had a bad moment later in the day when I got blanked by a fellow Fulham fan. That was my favourite moment of the day. Matt strolling down the parade outside Philippe Chetre spotting a man in a Fulham show shouting up the whites and getting completely blanked.
3:33Everybody's aware of the weather forecast. That's another big thing. Players were bringing that up unsolicited in press today. I remember last year when I was panic ordering trousers. I need to throw away my trousers this year. No, they didn't arrive, did they? They didn't. But I did get a refund. and don't get your violins out for me. She has the bandage for her wrist on the left wrist, and she apparently said to Matt that it's kind of OK because she doesn't need to work on her backhand anyway. Kind of a flex there. I love that. That's right, we've not had two completed career slams in the same season in the whole of tennis history.
4:20Tennis history's pretty long.
4:24But he's fitter than he's ever been. He's following a strict diet plan for the first time in his life. Yeah. He's lost 12 to 13 pounds. I don't know where from. He's lifting heavier than ever before. It's giving post-breakup.
4:41I think intrigued is also how I feel. I just want to see where he's at and see, honestly, see how he, like, now the tennis players are talking about breakups and how that affects, like, focus and everything. I'm interested to see him back on court. The most single man in the world.
4:59You had your first Roda press conference experience. He was wearing the shirt I want to buy. Spain's away shirt for the World Cup. I tried to buy it the other day to celebrate my Spanishness. Sold out. It felt like such a long time between the Australian Open and the French Open that I'd be like, yay, the tennis is back on TV. And when I was walking to site for the first time, I just looked to my left and saw practice courts and came through the back way, and I was just like, God, these courts are beautiful, and they just looked like velvet. And I said, oh, this is great. I can't wait for another slam.
5:38So I'm very happy to be here.
5:43I wanted a little bit more oomph from Casper this morning. I quite often want quite a lot more oomph from Casper. Isn't that the story? Ava has summed up my position perfectly there. I just always want a bit more room from him. He said he was playing, what, taking three weeks off? And I knew, I was like, there's a Bad Bunny concert the Saturday before Wimbledon. I was like, and Caspar Rood will be there. That's exactly what I thought. He's not your oomph guy, though, is he? Well, exactly. That's why he's just not for me. That's what I'm saying. And that's fine. People like different things. I have nothing against him.
6:15He's not an oomph guy. I like oomph.
6:22You know, I think ideally he would have liked that match to be a bit shorter and less sweaty. I would like all things to just be a bit less sweaty at the French Open.
6:35And Prismich won easily today. He did, he's soaring. Officially. You need to change the group chat back. I know, we ditched him after one match. You ditched it so quickly. He only arrived from Hamburg a few days ago and it had been 10 degrees there. He said it was like 22 degrees warmer here. He hasn't really had time to adapt to the conditions. He sort of took most of his clothes off at one point and doused himself in cold water. Like, he was really struggling.
7:11Final bit of reporting, important journalistic reporting from the men's side of things today. We've had our first watery shits of this... Week! ..of this Grand Slam. It came so quickly. So quickly. We were talking last night, what's more on the rise? Puking slash watery shits or hindrance drama. But today it was all about the watery shits for poor old Arta Gea from France. Well, I mean, there's no two ways around this. He ended up going up to poor old John Blom in the chair and saying, do you speak French? I have diarrhoea. I need to go to the bathroom. I can't hold it anymore. I'm going to shit myself.
7:56And at that point, a Polish gentleman came and joined me in the press seats, obviously covering Lynette. And he got a bit excited when she went 7-5 up in the tyre break, thinking she'd won. and he sort of bolted off down the steps and then somebody says, no, it's not over and he came running back up.
8:25Longlen tomorrow opens with Arta Rindikinesh. I mean, I'm not sure what's worse, actually. Like, this one being first up on Longlen is quite something. Rindikinesh Rodionov. David was like, if it is a late one tonight, I don't think I need to be in for first match tomorrow.
8:44Who knows what to expect from blooming Flavio Caballi. It's a rollercoaster having him in your fantasy team, let me tell you. I think she's a Caballi guy but wants to reserve the right to... Drop him like a hot potato. Or be annoyed. Or just be annoyed about it, yeah. I need to feel my feelings, David. Yeah, if it's reliability you want, I'm not sure Flavio Caballi's your man. No. I'm... Caspar Root, maybe? He always delivers, Catherine. Catherine Norrie? You troll Norrie. What do you want, Catherine? Norrie's into it, Catherine. Never happy. Incidentally, the thwack sounds you can hear in the background are those of Gaël Monfils, who is hitting on Philippe Châtrier ahead of his match tonight against Hugo Gaston.
9:35Very amusingly, he quite clearly went to the hitting partner desk and said, I'd like a short lefty, please. Yes, although I would say that is where the similarities with Hugo Gaston end. I haven't seen this guy hit a troll shot yet. Jill Teichman. Do you remember her, David's shooting star from about five years ago? Yeah, you know. She shot a little bit today, David. She did, she won a match. She's been rolling aros for round two. I feel like I want to talk about my favourite Wawrinka, probably memory ever really is a shot he hit in that match against Djokovic in the 2015 final and he slotted a backhand winner through the gap between the net post and the sponsor box that they have and he hit a backhand winner through it down the line top spin drive unbelievable shot that's the one that when I shut my eyes and think of that final that's the one I think of Rafael Hodah who absolutely destroyed Alex Kovacevic 6 '1 6 'love 6 '4 in an hour and 34 minutes he heard our concerns about his body potentially not being able to stand up to best of five set tennis and he decided to make best of five set matches the length of best of three set matches problem solved David yeah an hour and 34 minutes no trouble at all I was hoping we would see Hugo Gaston come out for practice and we could see who he had got as a hitting partner having gone to the desk and said, I'd like a Guillermo Fis, please.
11:25Obviously, Guillermo Fis is a tennis player. We'll miss him terribly. He only needs one, though, and he has got two left, so you never know. God, imagine. No. On every walk to and from Roland Garros, there is a point at which conversation lulls. David thinks and pauses for a few moments and he goes, God, just imagine if... And then says something totally improbable. But not impossible. But not, crucially, not physically impossible. and he begs us to imagine a world in which that could happen, which is very David Law.
12:16It is half 11 at night or in the evening. We are back in our usual spot. The temperature is finally palatable after highs in the mid-30 Celsius throughout most of the afternoon. We are being savaged by mosquitoes, though, but we'll take that over savaged by the midday sun.
12:39Yeah, I mean, we're all sort of talking around it here but basically it's turned into Melbourne and Musketeer of the Day has turned into Sensation of the Day. That is what has happened today at Roland Garros because Adam Walton and Kim Birrell are our big upsetters of the day and no, it's not the Australian Open, it's Roland Garros. his defeat to Adam Walton of Australia 6216 611664 described by a French journalist to Daniel Medvedev in the post-match press conference as a very silly match which was one of my favourite moments of the day yeah and he's not keen on getting up early in the morning Quote, I don't like to get up early and I'm usually less performative when I have to get up at 6.15am.
13:35Yeah. I hear you, Daniil. But you do, Catherine. Matt and David were not having this. I'm still not. I think that is pathetic. Fine. Yeah, I understand that it's not his preference and it can have an impact, but I don't think it should be something that you mention in a press conference playing at 11 o 'clock. When you're up against Adam Walton, are you supposed to be beating? Yeah. They're not having it, folks. Champions adjust. Look, I've got Billie Jean King on my side. I don't need you to. But she also says champions adjust. And I do adjust. We very often podcast at 8am. Yeah, Membidav didn't.
14:14Simple as. You're not the subject of my vitriol.
14:23it had me thinking today what happens if sinner gets affected by the heat and somehow ended up losing in the next two two or three rounds when when it's still this hot what on earth's gonna happen then in the draw you know who's gonna let who's gonna be left standing
14:44You know, Medvedev's gone from those possibilities as well. You've still got Kabbali, still got Surundalo, still got Tien. Excuse me, Matt, both Surundalos? Yeah, but not in that section. Oh, OK. In this half, you've got both Surundalos? Yeah.
15:04Landon Luthe won today. He's in the Yannick Sinner section. That would be a third round. The Juan Manuel Surundalo section, you might say. Excuse me, the Juan Manuel Surundalo section. More on him in a moment. I mean, in a week that could end up being defined by how you cope with the conditions, he is, as a young player, he has shown something about himself today, hasn't he? You know, winning a four-hour, 30-minute match. David's got big hopes for the scheduled Landaluthe-Sinna third round match I'm just hoping he's got something left in the tank if he gets that far to be honest after this epic he just played well excuse me Alex Senna would have to make his way past Juan Manuel Surundolo in the second round to get to that third round
16:03I think he gets the night session if he asks for it, and he will ask for it. And OK, his opposition in the next round is only the bad Sir Undelo. But if he's in a day session and it's 35 degrees and the sun's beating down on him, there's a scenario where it doesn't matter who's down the other end.
16:31And it feels only right to start with our second contender for Sensation of the Day, which apparently is making a comeback. Are we going to be doing Muscatara the Day in Australia? Well, they do do reciprocal wild cards, don't they? Very good.
16:50That is quite something for Beryl to go from playing Pagula, who I would say probably has the lowest trajectory over the net, to Olin O 'Kova, who I think has the highest trajectory over the net. The most consistent ball you're ever going to get, albeit hit very hard, and then the most unpredictable and unusual ball. Yeah, that is a wild combination of opponents.
17:24As proved when Laura Sigmund was asked what she thought of the Naomi Osaka outfits. What did she say, David? I don't care. I'm here for tennis, not a fashion show. Maybe she'd have been a bit warmer about it if she'd have won. I don't think she would have been. If I know Laura, and I think I do, I really don't think she would have been.
17:53She did say, by the way, in the press conference that she had also packed a couple of other Nike dresses in case the umpire said, you're not allowed to wear that dress because it's too bright in the sun and that the sun will dazzle your opponent. And if any opponent was... Yeah, if she's passed the Siegmund test, everyone else will be fine with it.
18:22But, yeah, I do think it's Kwame. also because his favourite player is Petra Kvitova. Isn't that fun? How do we get across TikTok? We're on it. You're big on TikTok, David. Did you know it occurred to me today that I could, if I time it right on Suzanne Longland tomorrow, I could be reunited with the drop shot dragon 25 years on. You might remember that. You're quite easy to remember though, David. You've got some distinctive features. Could we try? Could we genuinely try and make that happen? Sure. I think you should try and get his attention by shouting drop shot dragon. Take it from there. It would be quite interesting to see if he turned around.
19:18It would be so disappointing if you didn't. Imagine how hurt I'd be. There were injuries and all sorts of distressing scenes on court. And, yeah, trying to react to all of that and put it all together in one day is just difficult. I feel like I've been in a blender, to be honest.
19:43But, yeah, Ostopenko was all over the place. And it kind of dawned on me that actually maybe Magdalena was the worst possible opponent for her to face to set up the Svjantek match because all of Poland had come out to help Magdalena and Iga Svjantek. Everyone in the crowd basically was a Polish fan. There were even three men spelling out Iga on their T-shirts, trolling Ostopenko by applauding her errors.
20:15suddenly he starts walking towards me and you know he's passing the other way and i thought well i won't i won't i won't interrupt you know he stopped to talk to me you're very memorable david and he shook my hand he gave me a little hug and he had a little chat and he instigated a little chat about drop shots um and uh and he and i said do people still call you the drop shot dragon from time to time and he says well you know he says you know but but you know he hits a lot of them but actually he hits too many of them and and he needs to learn how to cover it better um but he's been coaching him for years i think he needs to take some responsibility for that that's when i'll be having lunch good player andley you've got to eat you've got to pick your moments we're just trying to survive
21:13there are 1000 points on offer for Yannick Sinner to lose this match in straight sets don't think anyone's gone for it but someone might have gone for Sinner to lose in 4 which is 400 points
21:35He was a game away from an efficient, comfortable victory when all four wheels came off at once From 5-2 in the third set, Sina lost 18 points in a row This is a man that has won his last 30 tennis matches
21:59the buzz came for us when he was called to the press conference room when the announcement came well the announcement came yannick sinner is coming i think it was 4 40 at the time uh and that was eight minutes it was it was 4 32 at that time and then 30 seconds later it was yannick sinner's coming now yannick sinner's on his way and then five seconds after that it was yannick Sinner is in the main press conference room. It was a stampede. The entirety of the press room just immediately stood up and just went towards the interview room. Every single seat was filled. The entire corridor on the left of the room was filled with standing room only.
Read the full transcript
22:41And then there were people basically queuing out of the door and looking over heads in order to try to get a look at what Yannick Sinner was doing and saying.
22:53You know, it feels a little bit like the 2020 US Open to me, that COVID one where you could call it a freak incident. Here it's the heat and Yannick Sinner succumbing to that. And there it was Novak Djokovic getting defaulted. and suddenly the whole draw looks different and everyone kind of shat themselves.
23:24And, yeah, we could be in for a fascinating few days, particularly on that side of the draw. We could be in for an all-surrender-low semi-final. I'm not sure needing four sets to be injured, Hugo Gaston says semi-final form, but we will see.
23:44And then suddenly I heard this roar coming from Susan Longland Court and I thought, ooh, hello. It's calling me. This has got my name on it.
23:56Seeing it all, you know, he used to write for the Evening Standard with Althea Gibson at Wimbledon. That's the sort of knowledge of the history of the sport that we're talking about. And he was absolutely buzzing about Kwame. I'm just so pleased for Gasquet that he's got this. He looks far happier than he ever did as a tennis player. There was a moment Matt turned to me and said, I've never seen Gasquet look this happy. No. And invested and committed and looked right where he wanted to be, which I never felt during his playing career. Yeah. We've got a bit of an issue with, we can't really get things delivered to our flat, can we?
24:38Because we tried that last year and I had some trousers go missing on the other side of Paris. And out there somewhere in B-Lancourt, someone's walking around in Tennis Podcast merch samples that we never got either. And Cezanne trousers. Someone's looking really snappy out there.
25:00Kosopova's dog caused a hindrance. On the rise. Hindrance is on the rise. Catherine's kind of hindrance. Exactly.
25:13Prediction for that one? Djokovic. Djokovic, yeah. What chance do you give Fonseca? 20%. Yeah, sounds about right.
25:25Midway through, what is developing into one of the craziest major tournaments in our lifetime, certainly on the men's side, at least, with the loss of Novak Djokovic today, we are guaranteed to arrive in the second week of the tournament with no Grand Slam winners in the draw for the first time since the start of the Open era. Thanks to 19-year-old Joel Fonseca, who this evening recovered from two sets to love down to defeat the 24-time major champion Novak Djokovic. Did this match, Matt Roberts, make you feel the way an epic Grand Slam upset is supposed to feel? Was it payback for yesterday? The level of tennis he produced was outstanding and I must on air apologise to David for hurting him in that fifth set with my flailing limbs.
26:33Physically hitting me. In response to the Djokovic backhand down the line winner deep in the fifth set, I just didn't know whether he was going to go for it. And he did. And he just nailed it and had an involuntary bodily reaction and hurt David. This is a real evolution of Matt reactions because we've had a lot of noises, haven't we? But flailing limbs is an upgrade or a downgrade. It wasn't isolated either. Teichman had a cheer squat. She had a fan club next to the court. You know, like, there's big player boxes, player areas on Longland. And Teichman had filled hers up with her friend. And they had songs, chants, and they were going through them one after one.
27:20It felt like they were the away team at a football match, winning, and just going through their chants and mocking the home team. Would you do that for me? I was in the third round of the French Open Get some chants going Would you fly in And script some chants I'm all there David would just be shouting Baggies
27:48And their songs go Oh Jill Teichman You've got to have a name That fits into that melody They were happy to use it I think mine's a bit long I think you'd need to write something bespoke Catherine, where'd you go? OK, we'll workshop that. I think we've got time before I reach a Grand Slam third round. You shout out the ball kid that held up a privacy towel, like a little privacy curtain, around her feet while she was receiving treatment on the blisters. This is an important new development for tennis. We don't need to see the disgusting feet. Cosign. Yeah. No wicky feet for Karolina Mukova.
28:40They go on to say, the Roland Garros tournament strongly... The Roland Garros tournament strongly condemns all sexist remarks, regardless of who makes them, and offers its support to the match umpire, and more broadly, to all the tournament's umpiring.
29:06The regardless of who makes them is bait. It really is.
29:17Incidentally, it does remind me of some reporting by Ava Wallace that the new WTA chair, Valerie Camillo, did meet, requested to meet with tournament director, Emily Ramirez-Moe before the French Open began. We don't know how that meeting went. You can probably imagine how that meeting went, but we don't have a transcript for it or anything or report on it. But the meeting did happen. Willing to bet the words holistic approach were used. With just two matches still to be completed across the men's and women's order of play today, there have been only three straight sets matches Get this, there have been more deciding set tie breaks than there have been straight set matches today.
30:07David Law promised a humdinger and the French Open delivered. Yeah, it's mayhem. It's absolute mayhem. Today's been the day where the women's draw were like, oh, we can do upsets too. And the men's draw has thought, well, you know, let's move on to everyone playing for five hours or pushing six hours. We've had so many screens on the go. We had five at one point. Yeah, I mean, just a while. Yes, my favourite message from someone on the bulge was that they started a match in Tuscany and got home to their sofa in England and it was still going on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up today, doesn't it?
30:55Absolutely wild. She didn't have a hotel booked, obviously. She was asked in the post-match interview, are you ready to book the hotel for the second week? She said, well, I hope that there are free places or that I have enough money because I know I earned a lot of money here, but it's not coming yet, so pray for me. I have to talk about Sneezegate. I've been waiting for this.
31:23Matt hasn't quite been the same person since this happened. And she throws the ball up for her second serve and someone in the crowd very loudly fake sneezes. I know it was a fake sneeze. Just to be devil's advocate here, how can you prove in a court of law that it was a fake sneeze? I know in my heart that it was a fake sneeze. OK. Because no one sneezes. Action!
31:57I hope that Maya Kvillinska's appeal to the hoteliers of Paris is just as successful as my come-and-get-me plea to the Shark Ninja people was a couple of days ago, which was, P.S., very successful. Catherine's fighting a real battle against the sort of general public sentiment that a lot of people want Kasparu to win this freight show for. Look, I'd be pleased for him, but let's not put him in the same bracket as Matteo Berrettini. He has not had opportunity heartbreakingly denied him He had his chance, he wasn't good enough Not enough oomph Berrettini wasn't struck down by injury Ahead of Novak Djokovic in the final No, and that's fine I don't feel injustice for him not winning that Wimbledon I feel injustice for him the following one When he had won Queen's And he got Covid on the eve of it And for all the other many sequences of injuries he's had since He's had a parasite Yes Yes, he was beating Alexander's Veve here two years ago and he had a parasite.
33:00I will be pleased for Kaspar Root if he wins this French Open. It's just these two things are not the same. But currently, today, there is only one men's match that was completed in straight sets. And that was a win by Flavio Caballi. Do you know who is absolutely, categorically not shitting the bed with this massive opportunity? And that is Flavio Caballi. so far.
33:29Top level wise I think he's the favourite to come through the top half of the draw. I actually think he's going to do it. Do you really? I do, yeah. My God. Yeah.
33:46I'm afraid it has to go to Deanne Parry. It does. It does. She earned it. Did that taste bitter in your mouth? No. Eight, it goes to Deanne Parry and the man that did the fake sneeze. Matt, the most spectacular tennis you've seen since the last time you watched Joao Fonseca play. That is exactly right. All of it watched on from the front row of the president's box. You know, when Fonseca was down that end, we're talking metres away, only a couple of metres away sometimes, by Gustavo Curtin, David, who was... You probably couldn't see because you were up here in the press seats for Matchpoint, but his eyes were wet.
34:39We're going to talk about Jakub Menchik in a moment, who seems to have the power to revive the dead. I'm talking about his own legs.
34:51That's a slightly Italian flavour. makes me think of the man behind me in the press room earlier that after a particularly extravagant rally between Rude and Fonseca, actually shouted, Mamma Mia!
35:09Canon Sky has got through. Shaping up to be a big tournament for tennis dogs, isn't it? That's the real story here, folks. Another missed opportunity for Denis Shapovalov. The draw's opened up and he's got a great dog. They keep stacking up. To be honest, Maya Kvalinska might have an excellent dog. I just don't know enough about her to be able to say categorically, who is this person? 114 in the world. Come through qualifying now in the French Open quarterfinal. Kvalinska was just not troubled by the Diane Perry slice. and that's like not being troubled by the Fernando Gonzalez forehand, right?
35:57Diane Perry's feeling good about a slice after that comparison. But you know what I mean? My God, what I saw tonight was electric. That point that you described, David, that's my point of the tournament. Like, I'm sure a lot of people listening to this will have seen it online by now. Like, that surely is going viral. It was unreal. Catherine screams, filled and empty, caught Philippe Châtrier as that was happening. I love it. I'm not sure which I like better. Catherine screams when something dramatic like that happens or Matt's backhand into my ribs. I think we all know which is sort of least like a crime.
36:42this is my i'm trying to find an elegant way to bring us on to flavio caballi telling caroline garcia and the philip chatray crowd and everybody watching on tv twice in the same answer that he is shitting on his pants
37:00i saw it live and it still makes me laugh now
37:06I think the other doubt I have about him is his physicality and the fact that he's faded in these long matches in the past. He has the powers to revive himself from the dead. Well, yeah, he is the undertaker. What greater physicality do you want from this man? He was in a wheelchair six days ago. He is pretty awesome. And yet that is also exactly why I was worried about him. Yes. Literally, I walked past whatever court it was the other day and there was a crowd of medics around him and he was riding around on the floor in pain and he left the court in a wheelchair. This was this tournament. But what I've never doubted about Menchie, ever since I saw him beat Djokovic in two tie breaks to win the Miami final, he doesn't shit himself.
37:55He doesn't shit on his pants.
38:00Arnaldi, did you see this stat? has spent the most time on court ever in a slam by someone to get to the quarterfinal stage. Wow. And he's beaten the previous record by almost two hours. Oh, my God. It is absolutely wild. Hey, folks, you think David's Pronseca prediction was bold? Yeah. I reckon the Plischkaver sisters could both reach a grandson final. Christina then retires.
38:41Matt. Hello, Matt. Like Matt Futterman. Matt Roberts. Yeah, but... But what?
38:52A grisly day here in Paris, a day in which the weather has once again made itself a main character at this extraordinary Grand Slam, a major tournament which, for the first time since Roland Garros 1977, will feature no Grand Slam champions in either the men's or women's semi-final lineups. And that is because of the shocking defeat earlier this afternoon of world number one, Irina Sabalenka, Sabalenka beaten from a set and 5-3 up by Russian 25th seed Diana Schneider. This was not a normal defeat. This was a total implosion.
39:38Sabalenka tried to bring the viewer into it, didn't she? She was like, well, nobody wants to watch tennis in those conditions ever. And I was like, I do. I love a hot mess more than anything.
39:50he was asked about superstitions wasn't he and then he mentions how he does like to go to the same shower in you know the locker room and he said it's rafa's shower and he knows it's rafa's shower because a few years ago he was in the shower and Nadal knocked, as he said. I love it so much. And told him to hurry up, basically, because Nadal wanted to get in the shower and he was waiting for him. And he said, this has been my shower for 14 years. Can you imagine how much you'd shit on your pants that you're not wearing when Rafael Nadal knocks on and said, you're using my shower. A tournament where we have learned to expect the unexpected and yet the most unexpected thing of all has happened today and absolutely none of us saw it coming.
40:56World number 114, Maja Fulinska, today became the first ever qualifier to reach a Roland Garros final. Charlie, you are quite often the guy that sees things coming. I will never forget you picking Marquetta Vondrosheva for the 2023 Wimbledon title when she was the last name on everyone else's list. Did you see Maja Walinska coming? I mean, I'd love to pretend I did, but no. I watch tennis all the time. I think about tennis all the time. I read about tennis all the time. And I had no idea that it was going to play out like this. And I've got that feeling again. It really humbles you. And it allows you to open your mind to...
41:49You never know. Exactly. Just imagine. It's that. It's how David lives every day. I always think this stuff can happen. And this is vindication. They're doing a press conference together. And it just, that sounded absurd. The guy's pulling out with a virus, so you're going to put him in the same room with the guy who's in the final. I mean, lovely gesture, if that's Flavio's idea, but what are you doing? Anyway, we get to the door of the press conference room, and sure enough, the desk is a really long one, and they were either ends of it, and nobody in between. With the slogan, only at Roland Garros.
42:38written on the desk, which is absolute perfection. I think they used to give him a bouquet of flowers to walk onto the court with. I think they do. And I think they do it for the men now. Right. Because hashtag equality, a bit like the way Madrid's response to being accused of sexism for having model ball girls was to have model ball boys as well. The day that has seen 19-year-old Mira Andreva crowned a Grand Slam champion for the first time. And if Matt sounds at all down about this turn of events, it's because he's just had the microphone rudely yanked out of his hand by Mira Andreva in a Conchita Martinez press conference.
43:27Yeah, it's OK. It went better than that sound. and Drava giddily entered the room and I thought oh no I'm going to be involved in some kind of exchange some sort of content potentially didn't want any of that you know she's been asked about the difference between her tennis this two weeks than the rest of her career given she's 114 in the world and she tried to qualify for this event three times and failed and here she's in the bloody final after qualifying she says yeah I I don't really think I've played my best tennis these two weeks. OK.
44:08Speaking of which, Dida Daghut is back, folks. Not only is she back, she has rang the death toll for Muscatara the Day, quite frankly. I think she's killed it off. the final daily tennis podcast from the 2026 french open this is number 18 of 18 and boy have we had some thrills and spills along the way how the whole tournament flipped completely upside down in about a 30-hour period in the first week when first Sine lost and then Djokovic Since that moment, all eyes have been on Alexander Zverev and whether he could cope with the magnitude of finally being handed the opportunity of a lifetime to become a major champion.
45:01And we now know that the answer is yes, he could and he did. In three consecutive points, played like his ceiling, then his floor, then his ceiling again. The final three points of the fourth set. He found a new floor. He found tennis's new floor. Flavia Caballi's got a smash to take it into a fifth. Oh, no! He's fluffed it. But it was almost like every time I expected him to fluff his lines, he didn't, and he proved me wrong. And every time I felt confident in him, he fluffed his lines.
45:50Just staying on Cabali for a moment, there's nobody quite like David Whittaker to kick a man when he's down. Oh, no. Look, he runs a type ship. There's my dad. And shortly after the conclusion of this final, I got a message from him to say, Cabali has been discharged from my crew.
46:16My first childhood pet was called Simon, and he was a little blue and white budgery car. You had a bird? Yes. You were a bird guy. Yeah, I was, yeah. Apparently, my mum says that you were either going to be called David or Simon, but we'd already called the budger Simon. So Simon was there before you. Wasted their favourite name on the bird.
46:47and low which is what the french sometimes call me mr low happens all the time does it happen this this time happens all the time your alter ego is simon low yes
47:11Charlie are you a cat guy So I have quite a complicated relationship With cats actually I did have a cat growing up Who I really loved And then Just sort of drifted apart a bit
47:28Jenny and I We just We had this really great relationship And then yeah Just went our separate ways a little bit Not helped by me once throwing a VHS in frustration at a last minute equaliser being conceded. Unbeknownst to me, it wasn't deliberate. She kind of entered the room and I very nearly hit her with this VHS. You've buried the lead there, Charlie. Yeah, that may have contributed to us drifting apart. You attacked your family cat. Not so much drifting apart. She bolted out of the room. I was going to show you Bashir, but I'm not sure I want him anywhere near you. But anyway, there's a lovely cat.
48:01Cute cat. Yeah, great cat.
48:05Thank you.
From the publisher
Our best bits, telling the extraordinary stories from the French Open 2026, which we hope will bring a smile to your face. Curated, edited and produced by Vicki Spreadbury for Friends of The Tennis Podcast.