PICKLES FOR MY POOKIE: WITH JACKIE DEJESU CENTER

0:00I can turn Jackie down a little bit in my head. again rude every year that's just really loud you're really loud am I loud in your headphones no do you want it to be louder no you're good now you're jacked up I was jacked up you're jacked up you're jacked up I am I've been jacked up better than jacked off because that'd be inappropriate because this is what I do for work in the office. That would be a bad thing.

0:443, 2, 1. Kevin. It's been a while. It's been a while. We're back. Three weeks off? Is that what this was? I don't know. I lost. I don't count the time. I make the time count. Wow, so fucking brave and bold of you The fans are clamoring They're like, what happened to the pod? Are you guys done doing this pod? Which is a fair question Yeah, you're very busy You take two weeks off I don't think we ever missed two weeks before Yeah, it's rare I hate this dress It's a rare occurrence But I'll just say it We are busy We had a busy month And we had a really exciting and important project And as much as we wanted a pod We just couldn't fit it in But we're back and we got a special guest.

1:33You already hear the voice. You know the tones. You know that it's the love of my life. You know that it's my better half. The end to my yang. The spaghetti to my meatballs. The end to your yang. Yeah, the peanut butter to my jelly. The mac to my cheese. The bacon to my eggs. The cereal to my milk. The left twix to my right twix. The fries to my burger. That's cute. the Taylor Swift to my Travis Kelsey. It's my wife. Shout out to Borat. Jacqueline DeJesus Center. Welcome to the building. What up, bitches? Kevin, you got the fucking right noise. I know. Soundboard. C for clap. Wow. Did you put a letter on it?

2:15No, I did it last time, and I just remember C for clap. Wow, what progress. Thank you. It took me however many years to learn that. Thanks for having me. Oh, it's our absolute pleasure. I'm really excited to be here. Thanks for coming on the pod. Yeah. Third annual. Valentine's Day episode. Third Timers Club. Third Time's the charm. Third Time is the charm. And we're talking, it's Valentine's Day. So it's a tradition around here that you come on the show to dissect what's going on in the world of design and branding for Valentine's Day. Yesterday was the Super Bowl, so we're not going to talk about that.

2:47Yeah, we're all a little tired, a little hungover maybe. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're trying to bring the energy up. So I got this, guys. We're energy high. High, high, high energy. Can I tell you the most incredible thing that's happening right now? In my seltzer, one of the blueberries has fallen? It's going up and down, and when it hits the Luxie, it goes up. And then when it hits the strawberry, it pops back down, and it's happened now in three cycles. Yeah. Jackie, on the record, do you have a weed pen I could hit real quick? How could you tell? I don't have a pen on me, but I do have a bowl. That's okay.

3:24No weed smoking inside of the Center Design Studio. No, just walking to and from the Center Design Studio. That's good. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I can take that out. We already started recording, guys. It's a cannabis street. It's a dream drug. Yeah, but we're not here to talk about it. I had one of those. Why not? I thought we were talking about whatever. Fine, fine. Go. Mr. Rules. Mr. Rules over there. Mr. Rules over there. What's the best two weeks to start following rules? Sorry, sorry. Mr. Rules. It was my talk about the employee handbook. Mr. Rules over here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, what kind of rules do you got?

3:59You want to break them? Last night I had a cannabis beverage. Okay. Can. Can, yeah. That's like two milligrams and then four milligrams THC. You can buy them at bodegas. Yep. It's crazy. Yep, that's true. What do you think? What's the review? It was nice. I would probably reach for that in the afternoon. Okay. Yeah. They're good for the beach. Yeah. You know, like when everyone else is like cracking beers on the beach. You keep them in the cooler. Yeah, I want to see what happens when I drink. 10 of them. I'm just kidding. They're also really good for festivals. Jackie, can you get a little bit closer?

4:32Yeah, you got to get closer to the mic. You got to almost touch it. That's what she said. Sorry about the Valentine's Day episode. Can I pepper it with sexual innuendo the entire time? It would only be the right. It would only make the uncomfortable. Yeah, ASMR. ASMR. I don't know. Just remember that I'm third wheeling here. Yeah, and it could get awkward. Although Kevin did just tell me that he loves me. So it's already - Didn't he also say something about jacking off? I didn't say that. He didn't say that. Just kidding. He did say that. He did say that. All right. I'll take control of this ship.

5:09Kevin, we got stories here, and we got a good amount of them. I didn't say anything about jacking off. No. Okay, guys. Settle down. Don't put those words in my mouth. I'm sorry. Yeah. We're mature adults. But whatever. just kidding it was out of context it's out of context now that goes against the handbook in a major way do you even have a handbook? we do yes okay and you know it doesn't go against the handbook yeah but what do you mean we're a real place of business around here so we have some stories things are going on Valentine's Day Valentine's Day Jack where do you rank it in the sort of marketers holiday calendar uh you know sort of uh of of events of or topics or uh things you could do with brands like on a scale of one to ten or like in the hierarchy of needs yeah on the hierarchy of like brand activation moments right you got so the thing about the thing about valentine's day from a from a marketing perspective yeah is that it's after q4 okay and it's after the new year new you yeah put the fours up for q4 q4 it's after holiday bonanzas and then it's after the like first of the year new year new you stuff so it it's like the thing on the calendar that basically kicks off the year of like how hard you're gonna go if you're gonna be smart or not and it always is like you need to do something in february so it's it's black history month and then it's valentine's day got it and then when's mother's day is that next month no may wow we got a long May.

6:45May. Okay. So, yeah. And then there's the federal and national holiday. My birthday is before that. Oh, yeah. Of course. Yeah. April 8th. Which all brands celebrate. We're off for that, right? Yeah, we're off. You should be. That would be so funny. Well, Jackie, I just want to let you know, I'll be taking your birthday off this year out of solidarity with you. I love that. And I'm not counting it as a personal day or a vacation. Can you please give them off for my birthday? Just put it as another sick day. Or just bond. Yeah. Just having a sick day celebrating Jackie. Jackie. I love that. Yeah.

7:15No, that's a beautiful thought. Kevin, I like this shirt. What is this? Because you always take off. So if everybody's off, then everybody will be so happy that I was born. Well, one of our new, that is true. It will only create sort of optimism and support around you as a person. Yeah. Because they'll be like, oh, it's Jackie's birthday again. We're looking forward to it. We're looking forward to it. Yeah. Can we do that? I mean, listen, anything is possible. I mean, now it's on record. Yeah. I mean, I'm doing it. we recently uh we started giving off people people get their own birthday off which is or a day in their month and the day or a day in their month yeah so you don't have you can work your birthday if work is your favorite thing to do but if you don't want to you don't have to and you can say take a free day in the month of your birthday which how do you feel about that feels good maybe we could do something like that one day in the month of april you get off and but you have to spend at least half the day i think this is a totally different corporate policy like Like me being on the federal holiday calendar is like, I feel like that's.

8:14You want to be celebrated. Damn, I didn't know you were a Fed. I was in federal trial last year. Okay. Do you want to talk about it? They were. They were. Do you want to break this one down? All right. So we got stories. The first one comes from one of the most famous brands only for Valentine's Day and then completely disappears back into the darkness. And that is a brand called Sweethearts. And so if you don't know who Sweethearts are, they make the famed conversation hearts. They are tiny pieces of sugar that have little sayings on them. My first question to you guys, did you know that the name of the brand that makes these things is called Sweethearts?

8:58Of course. Yes. Okay. I would say that I didn't. I would say when you said it, I was like, oh yeah, that is the name of the brand. But I don't know that if I was pulled over on the side of the street in a different month in October and said, who makes those candy hearts? I'd be like, I don't know. They just appear on Valentine's Day and they disappear. So Sweethearts is the name of the company, the brand that makes them. Are you sure that that's true? For me, I'm saying for me. No, that is true. Sweethearts is the name of the brand. There's more than one brand that's making conversation hearts.

9:31Oh, okay. Conversation hearts are the category. Got it. But there's not just like one hero brand? I think sweethearts are the sweet, are they the sweet tarts of the? No, they're the ones that you think of. But you know those wafers that like come in like the rice paper roll that like are colored? No. Jesus had the best Super Bowl commercial of the night last night. We're not talking about Jesus. We're talking about love. Oh, sorry. Sorry. The wafers? Yeah, they're like different colors and they almost look like little discs and then they're rolled in the thing. No idea. Not Pez, right? Kind of like Pez.

10:09Oh, Smarties? No, different. What type of disc? Like a wider disc? Wider and thinner. Oh. That's what she said. Yeah, I... It's inappropriate. Wow, Alex. Listen, you guys started this and I fucking... Can we just make the whole... much i didn't yeah so sweethearts is the name of the brand and so um they have a new idea right so they they they have a new their idea is called situation chips and essentially they want to embrace the imperfections of the modern dating trend specifically situation chips and uh those things are something that they want to celebrate with misprinted candies. And so they are a little bit blurry and they say the same things as the regular candies do, like Only You or True Love or other things like that.

11:05But they are a little bit blurry, a little bit hard to read, and feeling a little bit sort of blurry or a little bit misprinted to symbolize the complications of Gen Z love life. You could buy these starting January 8th, which was months ago, on SweetheartCandies.com. Is Gen Z love really that complicated? They seem like they're doing just fine. Yeah, I agree. This screams old person. Yeah, this person just read about situationships on Cosmo or some dumb outdated magazine and then decided, oh yeah, this is cool. yeah it's what the kids are doing i think the the concept of using like what would otherwise be like quality controlled out for something that's a marketing campaign like that's always funny to me is it funny i think interesting it feels like they're trying to play off their misprints as like some sort of concept because it does feel like one thing i will say about those those candies which i'm gonna go on the record real quick those candies suck those are terrible those are terrible candy and i like candy corn like i'll stay i'll ride for some pretty shitty candies those candies are trash i would say half of them are misprinted like you know i feel like that's part of the the the the just the the production of these things suck and so now they're like trying to use some of those those misprinted candies and try to play them off as blurry situationships this is this is bullshit factory malfunction this is just malfunction from yeah the factory qc quality control i think i think anything at that scale my supply chain supply chain anything at that scale is going to have enough q seed out to isolate and make into a random holiday campaign so like i just think it's efficient and sustainably minded and they needed to pull some shit out of their hat anyway for valentine's day so why not do it this way but they it kind of looks like somebody licked all of them just like a little bit that's so gen z somebody who's just like on the end of the conveyor belt with their tongue out and that's the job it up a little bit yeah i mean these candies suck and i i'll just say next topic i think you know what they should do they should make them more vulgar yeah make them more vulgar or like make them say more interesting things i feel like they always say the same shit i feel like this should be like an ongoing what if they just make them taste better like put the focus i don't know if that's possible Those things are such trash.

13:40Anything's possible, Kev. Yeah, but don't you think they should... Listen, call me crazy. Innovation is everywhere. Technology, we have computers strapped to our faces now where you can put up screens. We could put up new phrases on these fucking candies, right? Yeah, they should say, let me eat your ass. Yeah, they should say some new stuff, right? Gen Z stuff like that. Gen Z stuff like that. Is ass eating? Is that the Gen Z thing? Yeah, Gen Z, that's for sure. They made it hot, right? No, they didn't. Yeah. No, they did. Let's edge. Let's edge. Speak for all Gen Z, Kevin. What? What's edging?

14:14Oh, I know what edging is. Yeah, it's the opposite of gooning. Gooning. You're not ready for this conversation. Yeah. I have a quote from Evan Brock, the vice president of marketing for Spangler. What's Spangler? Is that the parent company of Sweethearts? That's what I'm saying. I think Spangler is the brand. We're like Spangler. Am I right? Spangler. I hardly even know her. Damn right. singles are fucking killing it singles are taking situationships to the next level this year and sweethearts is here for them the printing on sweethearts isn't always perfect you're damn right this is our way of embracing those imperfections in a way that taps into pop culture this is terrible like why like what are we doing research from tinder the world's most popular dating app indicates that young singles now consider the situationship to be a legitimate at relationship status.

15:04The undefined and noncommittal situation continues to evolve as people are less concerned about relationship. How come what are we doing here? Back in my day we didn't even communicate the status of our relationship until we wanted to. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. You want to know something that's going to make us sound so old? Yeah. Let's do it. Alex and I have been together for 17 years and when 16. Well it'll be 17. I guess so. Damn your relationship can drive. Damn. My relationship, our relationship can drive. Yeah, that's cute. I've never thought about it that way. When we first started dating, there was no Instagram official because it was so new as a platform that the social constructs around how to use the platform weren't they weren't established because it wasn't a thing.

15:53And everyone just like posted pictures of like like other things like it wasn't what it was. Yeah. Well, let's move on to period sex. next topic Valentine's Day is right around the corner and this year wait did it make you feel bad because you felt old no I just you know I don't like to disclose my age you know to the listeners they think I'm a spry 23 year old oh do they or 29 with 40 awards behind you they think that I got those in the last five years I had a very successful early start to my totally to your career come on Alex AJ nothing but a number yeah just like Aaliyah said I just don't know why it's so much sexier if you just embrace it did Aaliyah say that I wouldn't bring up what Aaliyah said in relationship to...

16:33I'm just saying, you should own your age. All right, I'm almost 40. Okay, Valentine's Day is right around the corner. Menstrual health brand, You by Kotex, wants to further its mission of normalizing periods. Customers don't typically associate those two things, but that's precisely what You by Kotex is trying to do. In collaboration with Fazee, do you know who Fazee is, Jack? Is that a brand you're familiar with? A brand that produces functional foods for better periods. you by Kotex unveiled its let's have period sex campaign by agency quality meats to break the stigma around getting it on during that time of the month.

17:13So the idea here is a box of chocolates that has chocolates inside of it that help you, um, that, that produce for better periods. And then on the outside of it says, let's have period sex. What do they all got a cherry filling on the inside or something? Whoa, okay. Oh, man. I love that he's just going for it. Can I go for it, too? Yeah, go for it, Jack. Can I go for it, too? This will be our last box. Let's go. I'll fuck any time of the month, but - Whoa. But - You heard it here first. I think that it's really - You know these things are forever. What? No, so let's go. That'll age great. That's good.

17:56um so you go against the data here according to research almost 40 percent of women would skip out on valentine sex if they had their period well no here's the thing but i get to choose because i'm married and i you know what i mean like if you're in a relationship you can choose when you want to have sex i think single girls are probably having sex on their period more but that is just coming from nowhere got it so because it's like if you get the chance and then it just happens to be that week, then you're both going for it. There you go. And 54 % of women, I have stats here, are game for period sex, but 40 % are embarrassed or shy about mentioning it to the partner, which I would agree it's a little bit easier when you have a partner that you've been with for a while.

18:39But also girls get really horny on their periods. So it's like a really fucked up intermingle of things. This is a great topic. So that's it. Get the towels ready. Oh, no. Well, the chocolate is vegan. It's actually a dark chocolate truffles with libido-boosting shatavari, an ingredient I never heard of, as well as by four UbiCotex pads. So it's basically a giant gifting box. What is UbiCotex? Why is that like a – I think it's like their proprietary pad shape. I'm not even bullshitting you here. I think it's like their patented little shape. Their shape? Because I think it fits better or something.

19:29Maybe. I will say, though, pads shouldn't be in the box because period sex, wouldn't period sex be tampons? I had a friend in high school that used to fuck with the tampon in so that it didn't get bloody and then just go up and pull it out after. Okay. Well, geez louise. Wow. Anyway, pads just wouldn't be in the box. I don't know. Yeah, well, this is created for 18-plus audiences. Just like this podcast. Just like this podcast. Not for kids. Not for kids. It is sold out on the You by Kotex website. Who knows how many they had, though? That means nothing. Yeah, they probably just did one, did a photo shoot, and then sold out.

20:07And they got a placement on this podcast. Yeah, a little Dye Line ad. And a little Dye Line. Did these all come from the Dye Line? No, they didn't. Some of them did. Not all of them. Shout out to the Dye Line. Shout out to doing the Lord's work and, again, finding all these amazing stories for us to talk about, especially when it comes to – I feel like they do incredibly well all the time, but especially when it comes to holidays and roundups. I got a personal – I got tagged in a Slack thread that said, hey, Kevin, are you looking for Valentine's Day stories? They put them right in the chat. This is one – Shout out, Rudy.

20:38Shout out to Rudy. Shout out, Rudy. Shout out everybody. And for that reason, we should also tell you that the Dye Line Awards are probably still open. and if not, we're sorry, but we're coming down to the end, so get your awards in for the Big D, the best trophy in all of design. The Big D is an appropriate call-out for the Valentine's Day episode. That's right, exactly. Speaking of, did you see the Drake leak, Kevin? Did you see this? I did see the Drake leak. Yes. I think it's a deep fake. Jackie does not believe that it's real. I don't know. Absolutely, it's a deep fake. He breaks the internet all the time.

21:10Any of you guys who believe it. Drake the snake. No. I want to believe. It's not natural. I know. I mean, you think so. I mean, how many dicks have you guys seen in your life? I'm just saying. I played high school football. I've seen quite a few. Okay. Hard, though? That wasn't really hard, right? It was hard. That's quite a video. I had to show it to Jackie at dinner, which, you know, because a date night for Jackie and I, a little inside baseball. you know when we're not thinking about work thinking about Drake the snake? no I need to fill Jackie in on the things going on on the internet yeah because all I do is work and all my husband does is scroll on his phone that's not true I just have I prioritize culture as I see it as an important ingredient to the work that I do and I prioritize my business I prioritize Drake's snake that dude's got a freaking hog it's not real I beg to differ It's not real It's just the latest in his way to stay in the news cycle He breaks the internet He has concepts and brainstorms about how to keep Drake cool It's the same PR nonsense I mean the video was pretty flattering It's literally the size of that pipe Which pipe?

22:32That one It's an audio experience Oh sorry There's a large pipe that goes from the ceiling to the floor. You don't think that Dre could have a large pipe? I think that he could have a large pipe, but I think that, honestly, if that was what his dick really looked like, then more people would have to be talking about it, and he would never know it. He's got those NDAs on log. We're now talking about it. Yeah, that is a thing, though. He does have people sign NDAs and lots away their phone. Everybody has everybody sign NDAs, and then Dumois exists. I mean, it's like the craziest thing I've ever seen in my life.

23:03You think we would have known this already? I'm just saying like that's like a gut busting like no pun intended like that would like damage someone someone would wind up in the hospital with like I don't think it's that big cervix are you kidding it's the size of an arm yeah I mean listen I listen I Drake has a lot of confidence also but here's the other thing the proportions were weird to his like normally a dick that big is like fat.

23:32This is where the plot is going. I was just saying. Here's what I'll say. Of all your arguments, I think that one is the strongest, which is like... He was filming it from a mirror. It was a bit of a weird... It's a reflection. Too perfect and long. Are we videotaping? It's too perfect and long, and it's not fat enough to support its weight. Wow. So if you actually look like Like the other, like big dicks get chody. They get better. Okay, okay. I mean, listen, you were saying the proportions didn't add up. The math wasn't math. Yeah, and it just feels like a deep fake just stretched out what's probably a healthy size dick.

24:11Okay, well. I mean, he was in a mirror. I think there's some room for distortion with the angle in the angle of the mirror. Got it. You're thinking smoke and mirrors. You mean his PR team with the little earbuds filming the video that's about to break the internet? Either way, it's not going to hurt his brand. I think that's the thing I am. It is when they realize that it's actually like a micropenis and this whole thing was like a way to break the internet. Well, then his future girlfriends are going to be quite disappointed. But like Kevin and I, we want to believe. Yeah, we want to believe.

24:44We want to believe. I don't. I don't want to believe. What I'm saying is we haven't done the pot in a couple of weeks. Drake's penis was going to come up. We're just going to have to talk about it. This is the type of stuff. Death, taxes, and Drake's penis coming up. That's what I'm saying. This show is about pop culture. It's about branding. It's about stories that are going on in the world. And that took over the internet for at least 24, 48 hours. Kevin? Yeah. Exactly, because it was a deep fake that was seeded strategically. Well, agree to disagree. Moving on. KY Desire Darkroom is an idea from KY Lubricant, the number one brand in lubricants, and they're helping lovers overcome their relationship slumps by showing the power of telling your partner, I want you, with 53 % of people wanting their partner to arrange a dinner together at a favorite restaurant.

25:34That seems low. Isn't what people, like, 53%, I mean, I do think there are a lot of couples that are just like, Valentine's Day is not a real holiday, and they just kind of ignore it. But like 53 % does feel really well. This was a really good idea when the creatives pitched it. So the brand is tapping into the hottest dining trend, which is dark room core aesthetic. Is that a trend or just literally a restaurant with the lights dimmed? They're just making shit up. So the idea here is they're hosting a series of red lit dinners for couples to explore new sensations together and reignite the want in their relationship.

26:12What's this, like a swingers party? It's just dinner in a dinnly - a price fix. Every restaurant in New York will have a Valentine's night restaurant. I'm out on this. I would be afraid that I'd slip on the floor. Too much KY? Too much KY jelly. You bring up a good point. I think if they really did a dark room, red room, that would be hot and cool. To have a lube brand be a sponsored dinner. A sponsored brand dinner. that's just they need to be having like a slip it's like it was a good idea in the room and then when it got to the clients it became a worse idea and then when it got to production it became a worse idea what agency did this did they say um i does not say i love i love all agencies doing work yeah yeah i got i got some quotes but yeah the thing is that so they're going to be doing this at a manhattan restaurant called bar valentina and guests are going to bring their couples for an evening of centralized eating to discover new sensations under the crimson lighting.

27:19They'll have access to complimentary intimate infusion cocktails, yours and mine oysters, custom dessert recipes, and a goodie bag. This is just a branded. It sounds like a fuck fest. That's what I'm saying. It's a branded dinner. Yeah. We encourage you all to save room for dessert. This is bad. So you can get a reservation to Rezzy, Available for the 3rd and the 10th, so not even on Valentine's Day. So no substitutions or companies. It's just a price-fixed dinner at a restaurant with the lights red. And you got a gift bag of KY jelly. Yeah, but let's talk about what made it good. Lubricant. Which is if they walked...

27:58I mean, I worked in advertising forever, so the reality is that that's seven months away from the original idea. But the title doesn't match the execution, and that's the easiest way that you can tell if it lost the plot somewhere along the way. So like the dark room, right? Like that was what the creatives pitched. Yeah. And then the execution became the client watered down bullshit. I like it. What do you think was the original idea? I think they probably wanted to go sexier, darker, like sultry, or like really like actual, like a pop-up sexy, like sex room. Okay. Which would make sense for KY.

28:40And like I could like internally on the agency side. That's why I asked what agency did it. Because like if it's an experiential agency, you don't know. But like KY as a client at a at a big name firm, like those creative directors are there trying to push the limits every single fucking day. Like every single fucking day. So like they're pushing the juniors to push the limits, too. So like, yeah, that's that's the inside. I mean, food and Valentine's Day goes together. I mean, 53 % of couples are still going out for dinner. But that's not it. It's like if they wanted to do a price-fixed dinner, then they would have done a price-fixed dinner, and then that Valentine's Day activation would have been completely different, like bougie, KY.

29:21It's just a different concept. That's fair. To call it what it is, executed like that, to just effectively have red light and a price fix, that's where you know what they originally wanted to do and what they wound up doing. is not. Yeah, that's right. The integrity of the original idea is not there. If you really want to impress your date on Valentine's Day, you take them to Chipotle. I love this. Chipotle wants to get in on the Valentine's Day meals and excitement. They have 3 ,400 restaurants worldwide, and it's an iconic destination for Valentine's Day. Every single one of these stories has a quote, but also data.

30:07Yeah, they really love padding the research on these Valentine's Day stories. So dating culture, there's a report that on popular dating apps that people use the word Chipotle in their profile, they're 2.4 times more likely to strike up a conversation with a potential match. That's pretty awesome. So over the years, 2.4 times likely. 2.4 times likely. So it's apparently a hot button way to spark a conversation. And so it's been a popular destination for couples having their first bites of a budding relationship. And they have a link to the data. That's pretty cool. Yeah. I mean, I guess. We love fake data.