THIS IS A CRUMBL, PUT YOUR BLUE JEANS BACK ON

0:00Yeah, today is Bobby Bonilla day. Happy Bobby Bonilla day to all those who celebrate what a legend what an absolute legend. And for those that don't know, Bobby Bonilla signed the greatest contract in all of baseball. And he gets like$1.2 million every year for like the rest of his life. And so there's other guys who I think there are other. He was a pioneer of the deferred money. The story was that he had$6 million left on his contract in like 1999. And so he just took like a fuck ton of deferred money and was like, pay me later. And then listen, he's it's a good day to be Bobby Bonilla. Yeah.

0:35Shout out to him.

0:40three two one kevin what's up buddy nothing much how are you doing i'm doing okay man uh sustained a few injuries this week yeah you want to you want to get into it i'm a soldier listen uh i just i don't really want to get into all the details but just know that um i hate i hate all bikers i'm just gonna say there you're wearing a bike-a-thon shirt which feels like a slap in the face kevin Well, you know. I know. It's your people. So I don't want to put you on the spot here, but defend all bikers and how they sort of believe that the streets are only for them. I can't defend all bikers, but I will say when you are biking around, your life is kind of on the line.

1:17That's true. With cars and pedestrians and runners. Yeah. No, exactly. Courtesy goes both ways. That's right. Courtesy does go both ways. Again, sustained a couple injuries, sort of a couple stitches, an afternoon in the emergency room. But we soldier on, Kevin. Podcasting, no days off. That's what they don't talk about when they talk about how many people are podcasting and how everyone's got a microphone now. But you know what? Podcasting isn't as easy as it looks. Yes. You got to find stuff to talk about. You got to find the will. That's right. The desire to talk and shit. Yeah, no, it's hard, man.

1:56Talking into these microphones, it's just not as easy as you think. Yeah. You got to find things to talk about. But no, Kevin, I'm okay. Thank you for asking. Thanks for all the sympathy and all the messages and kindness that I got from all the listeners, all the people on the internet. Yes, I needed 40 ,000 messages of sympathy last week. Is that what you got? You know, yeah, a little under that, but... Nice. I'm all right. Kevin, you're back from the Bezos wedding. How was it? How was your time out in Italy. I'm not following it enough. This is what you were talking about. Remember, you were like, oh, I got one more wedding left and you didn't really talk about what it was.

2:31Now I found out that it was the Jeff Bezos wedding, Kevin. I wish. Yeah, dude. I wish I was in that social. Let's just say if I was at that wedding, I probably wouldn't be on this podcast. So you're lucky. Yeah. Taking a lot of heat. Well, you know. For that wedding. He's a bad person. Yeah. I mean, you know, we could redistribute that wealth a little bit. Yeah, you know. I don't know. $60 million to rent Venice. Seems like a decent price. I don't know. Call me crazy. I saw something. I don't know. It could be fake news, but somebody was like, yeah, it was like somebody spending$12 on a wedding cake.

3:04That's what I'm saying. It's like to him, that's nothing. Yeah. But to me, that's everything. Give me some of that. Break me off a little piece, Jeff. Exactly. I mean, the thing that I found the most interesting was like, how many celebrities were there? Is he friends with any of those people? Or they just were invited because he could and they showed up because they wanted? because why not? Hard to say. Hard to say. I mean, the biggest rumor from the wedding was Sidney Swinney and Tom Brady dancing. I did see that. The goat. I mean, why would she want anything to do with him? He's like - He's a great football player.

3:37I don't know. He was a great football player. He's still got it. I don't know. I feel like that. I don't know. I feel like that's a rumor. I could not really. I don't give a shit. No, I know you don't care. I don't even care. But I just feel like, yeah, what are those people doing there? Why? Like, why? You know who wasn't there? Joey Chestnut. Yeah, no, Joey didn't get the invite because he's in the lab. He's fucking working. He's training. He's training. It's a hot dog season, baby. Yeah, I mean, we're just days away from the extravaganza. Are you still going? Yeah, hell yeah. I'm still going.

4:06So you're monitoring the situation. We obviously talked about it two weeks ago about how Joey's back, the king. I think he's going for the record. What is the record? The record is, I think it's 76. 76. I saw him break it back in 2022. at Brooklyn Cyclone Stadium. Yeah. Indoors, right? No, outdoors. Well, outdoors. Yeah, you need the right conditions to eat dogs. They still have some COVID things going on then. Okay. They made them do it at the stadium to limit the capacity. Yeah. It's great. So the over is 71.5. That's what they put it. That's so many fucking hot dogs. That's the over under, yeah.

4:39I think I'm going to smash the over for sure. That's so many hot dogs. I'm feeling pretty bullish on over that because he's back, dude. I think he's going for the record. 77 dogs? I think he's going for 77. Jesus Christ. That's so many hot dogs. I actually saw a TikTok the other day, and it was some couple at a baseball game, and they did nine hot dogs and nine beers in nine innings. Well, yeah. And she did the dogs and he did the beers. That's cheating. And she crushed those nine dogs. She made it look really easy. It's supposed to be one person. That's the challenge. Okay. It's not impressive for a guy to drink nine beers in nine innings.

5:16I don't know. Nor is it impressive for anybody to eat nine hot dogs in nine innings. It's the combination that's the challenge. I think both are hard. I'm going to be real with you. I mean, both are hard, but like. I think I'd be sloshed if I had nine beers in nine innings. Yeah, definitely. But like both are hard, but the challenge is. At the same time. You got to be both. Impossible. She was eating some pretty big lookings like sausages. You got to keep them small. Yeah. You can't be. I mean, honestly, even the Nathans. Eating nine Nathans. Yeah. You got to go city field style. Ketchup and mustard only.

5:45No toppings. I ate 10 in 10 minutes and that ruined a week of my life. Yeah. People probably don't remember this because it was before our time as podcasters. But Kevin, while interning at Center, tried to bake Joey Chestnut's record of 70. No, I just wanted to qualify. You wanted to qualify. And what'd you do? 10 dogs? 10 in 10 minutes. No training. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, listen, that's still impressive to me. I think at the time you were talking a big game. So I think at the time we were maybe... Well, I was humbled a bit. You were certainly humbled by the dogs. I would not have even qualified at all.

6:16But I got to respect for them. Yeah. Manning the arena. It's a tough game out there. And it's quite impressive what he's doing. So I'll be there. I'm going to try to be on the rail, dude. I want to get some of that splash. Yeah. Watch out for the Astroworld situation. The Crush? Yeah, The Crush. I just watched that documentary. It's all I could think about is those poor people that died listening to Travis Scott. Well, yeah, I mean, there's no there's not going to be a crowd crush at the hot dog. I think I think you're right. They they would never sort of engineer. MLA runs a tighter ship than that.

6:53Live Nation. Yeah. We love you, Live Nation. Yeah, no, I look forward to hearing the stories. That's why I have to pod next. Yeah, we're going to have to give a recap report back. Kevin, we have late breaking news from Snackalator. Snackalator quickly becoming a sort of a sort of breaking news engine here for the podcast. Yeah, well, he's reporting on all the new snacks and shit. It's crazy. I mean, Andrea is, of course, best in the game. But just like Joey, has had no competition in the game. So is Snack-O-Later coming for Snack-O-Later? Well, I think Snack-O-Later is more like the big, big box.

7:30Got it. He's breaking all the Buffalo Wild Wings and Mountain Dew stories. He's breaking all that shit. But yeah, Snack-O-Later is more of a curated... She's on the ground floor of the cutting edge of snacks and food. And shoppy shops. You're saying sort of the, yeah, Snackulator is more of a mainstream audience, I would say. He might be getting paid off. Wow. By big beverage. But we know Andrea's independent. That's right. She's got integrity. Her morals are top. She's got integrity. Top tier, yeah. You can't put money. You're saying these potentially could be ads. Yeah. I mean, this is definitely an ad.

8:08All right. Well, here comes the ad. But Buffalo Wild Wings and Mountain Dew Breaking News are teaming up for a Mountain Dew Rattler. 50 % Dew, 50 % Beer, 100 % Available Now. Wow. Go to BW3s and drink nine of those. I'm going to say something controversial here on the podcast, Kevin. I've never been to a Buffalo Wild Wings. I don't even know if that's controversial. I mean, there's not that many around here. Yeah. Are they good? I mean, I feel like they had a moment when I didn't know what good wings were. Yeah. I mean, I had a fantastic time there from ages seven to probably 16. I've been craving some wings, so I got to get out.

8:50Where are good wings? Go to Bonnie's Grill in Park Slope. Bonnie's Grill in Park Slope. Okay, we just got really regional here for a second. I'll stamp it as best wings in New York. Wow. I know you were talking about Meckleburgs. I've never had that either, but no, Trash. I don't even think they're in business still. You have beef with them. No, they're in business because I saw they're on Seamless. Well, I'll take that back. I don't want to say. Yeah, they charge a lot of money for wings. So I was like, I don't know what's going on. Yeah, no, no, no, no. Yeah, big, big breaking news. Other big breaking news.

9:20Big Mike stepping down. No more Mr. Nice Guy. A big 8 ,000-word article in Fast Company about Michael Beirut, our goat, stepping down. Yeah. And I think in reading the article, it kind of seemed like he maybe wasn't stepping down. So a little bit of clickbait here, but he's stepping back. Yeah. He's the strategist at large, I guess. And he's in one day a week. Yeah. I guess that means he's semi-retiring. I think that'd be a good rule for me. Strategist at large. I'll just come in one day a week. Yeah. No, this sets a path for certainly a goal of mine, which is to still work kind of. So is that true?

9:56I feel like you like working a lot. No, I know. But I feel like you want to work always. Future me. I'm not talking about right now. Maybe. I'm talking about like down, down the line. Do you think things will change that much down the line? I mean, it is a little bit of an eye-opening. It's a rude awakening to me. He's 65 and I am 40. So I'm not that far away. I mean, it's kind of crazy to me. He's 67. Okay, he's 67. Okay, so I got 27 years. Okay. Yeah, I was confused. It says he's stepping down and then in his Instagram caption. What did he say? Here is a nice 8 ,000 plus words article on me exhaustively researched and beautifully written by Lily Smith.

10:44Yeah. Despite the headline, I am not really retiring. And by all accounts, I'm generally thought of as being nice. He is certainly known as being nice. I've met him. Yeah, I heard he's nice. He's one of the nicest people I've ever met. He's a genuine sweetheart. Yeah, so he's 67. and yeah, stepping back, I guess in the article, I can't wait to step back. He talked about sort of like he's less involved in the making, which is not a huge surprise to me. So he's more just leading the way, but only one day a week. So good for him. Good. Congratulations. You know, I think to be still involved in the work, I think leading from a one day a week perspective feels admirable.

11:26Sure. Aspirational. aspirational for yeah for this guy sitting at this table and and also if you have um i would love to work one day a week but right now when i'm 67 i'm hoping it's zero days a week listen retiring uh is sick i want to retire early that's why i gotta put that's why i gotta put my life savings on joey chestnut on the over here's one thing i will say as someone who took a couple days off for an injury not looking for your sympathy i got bored pretty quickly like i I watched multiple train wreck documentaries about poop cruises and Travis Scott concerts. I ran out of content real quick.

12:04And I will say I was pretty bored. And that's hard for me. I can keep myself entertained. I'd be all right. Yeah. I don't know. You need hobbies. You need stuff to do. I got plenty of hobbies. I got hobbies I can't even get to. I've got future hobbies. I've got a whole list of things that I'd love to do. Cool. Um, speaking of one of the things you wanted to do that I shot down on the podcast this week was try Benson Boone's moon beam ice cream cookie. It's the biggest brand story of the week. Yeah. Crumble. Is, is this the biggest brand story of the week? Yeah. Okay. Tell me about it, Kevin. What's going on on the internet that I don't know about.

12:41People are dancing and singing and doing back, back flips and taking off their blue jeans and crumble cookies all across America right now, um, to celebrate, uh, this Benson Boone cookie that you know uh crumble does i think they do like uh limited flavor releases every week it's weekly um and this is actually a week old stale cookie wow but they renewed it because you know they were getting so much traction the people so many people doing backflips in their store and shit but i don't know it's weird i opened tiktok when i was searching this and i saw just like videos of people uh taking their pants off okay you know pulling them down i mean And obviously they're wearing stuff underneath.

13:22It's generally appropriate. But I was like, what the hell is this? Okay. And who even likes Benson Boone? God, so last week people were going to Mike's and trying to order subs Mike's way. This week we're going to crumble. Yeah, can you get Benson Boone to fuck my cookie? And pulling down their pants? That's what we're doing? Wow. Is this engineered, do you think? Is this fake? Is this a real thing? I don't think it's engineered. I think Benson Boone, I guess, apologized on behalf of all of his fans, but I don't think he's really sorry. No, I don't think so either. People are doing backflips. Oh, yeah, they're doing backflips.

14:01They're singing. I mean, if you're going to do it. Acting a fool up in Crumble Cookie. We're going to do homage to Benson Boone. He's known for one thing. Benson Boone, not Benson Boone. Did you say Benson Goon? I call them Benson Boom. Benson Boone's Moonbeam Ice Cream Cookie by Crumble. Taking off your blue jeans. That's the lyrics. Got it, got it, got it. I'm not like the biggest Benson Boone guy, but - Sure about that? I know you're a big Boone head. So one thing I'll say - I'm a Benson gooner. I don't like Levain cookies. I find Levain cookies to be too much. There's a lot of people out there that disagree with me about this.

14:41There are people that love Levain cookies. They think they're the best. We're talking about crumble though. But I think crumble, I've never had crumble. They look even worse to me. I find Levain to be too much. They're too sweet. But they resemble a cookie. This is just cake. It just doesn't even in any world appeal to me. That's why I shot down this cookie. Yeah, did you read the calories on it? How many calories? 920 per cookie. Yeah, that's disgusting. I don't want to - 72 grams of sugar. Yeah. Crazy. That's fucking insane. I don't want to get on my fucking Brian Johnson here, but that's literally poison.

15:17Are you talking about Liver King Brian Johnson or are you talking about - I'm talking about Brian Johnson. Don't die. Brian Johnson. Okay. Is liver King named Brian Johnson? Liver King is named Brian Johnson. I learned that this week. Wow. I did. But back to Benson Boone. Yes. Big week for liver King as well. I did not watch that documentary on Netflix. I refuse to watch that. It was part of the untold sports series. Liver King is. He's not an athlete. What are we talking about here? Okay. Back to Benson Boone. What do you got? I don't really have anything. I just don't really understand who Benson Boone is for.

15:50Who is really out here listening to him? I mean, I guess I'm not a Zoomer. Yeah, I was going to say, Kevin, I'm going to break some news to you. You might be too old to understand. Yeah, I am too old for sure. I've never claimed to be young. I didn't know that Benson Boone was like 22 years old or something. I had no idea. Yeah, I just assumed he was sort of generally a young person, but I didn't know he was like a child like that. So I think Benson Boone is for like 14-year-olds. 14-year-olds? That's who I think Benson Boone is for. Interesting. And sure, I don't want to listen to it. I don't like it.

16:25It's not for me. But I'm not offended by Benson Boone. I'm like, listen, let that guy cook. Let him do his backflips. Let him do his Friday Mercury impersonation. Yeah, sure. Go off, King. But the fucking cookies. That's where you draw the line? Those cookies look so bad. Like they just don't even, they're the antithesis of what I look for in a cook. No, it's great, dude. It's got chocolate and icing and it's got more icing drizzled on top. It's going to be awesome. I guess. It tastes like a moonbeam, I guess. Yeah, I guess so. But listen, brands and artists and sort of collaborations and now this other added element where people have to go to the store and do something crazy for their TikToks is becoming a bit of a trend, I guess.

17:10They need to be paying those workers a little bit more. In-store workers are just going through it right now. They are. Mike's Way, the Benson Boone cookie. What's going to happen next, Kevin? Why do people think they can act the fool up in these establishments, huh? I guess so. They're just doing it for the content, which is really the grossest part of this whole thing. Yes. Keep your pants on in the crumble cookie. Do not take your pants off in the crumble cookie. I feel like you should get arrested for taking off your pants and crumble cookie you think so yeah yeah just have a officer on hand and just immediately lock them up yeah lock them up yeah send them send them to benson boone jail where they only have to listen to benson boone no they would love that no these people are are just doing it for the content uh speaking of just doing it for the content kevin uh lincoln park and haribo what is this why i just saw this yesterday shout out andrea yeah um i think her reaction was what the fuck um and i i tend to agree with her i don't know i tend to agree yeah yeah i i hate this i think that um link of park i mean r.i.p chester yeah i think it kind of died with chester i don't think you can really be out here doing brand collabs and the most crucial brand class i don't know man their most crucial member is you know not here not with us anymore so because their most crucial band member died, they can't continue on as a band.

18:31They can't be a brand anymore. All the other people that make a living off of this beautiful music have to stop, cease forever. I mean, they're still getting royalties and checks and shit. Yeah, I guess so. I don't know. This is so fucking random. Lincoln Park's not even very relevant. Are they trying to make a comeback? I think they replaced Chester with sort of a female singer that didn't seem that the collective internet was enthusiastic. I mean, you can't replace Chester. What are we talking about? He's the entire group. I don't know. What about Mike Shinoda? Yeah, I mean, Mike Shinoda's great, but like...

19:07He's got a quote here. He said, in the band, all of our families have always loved Haribo. When the opportunity arose to create our own signature gummies, we couldn't wait to create shapes and pick flavors that would best represent the six of us at founding member Mike Shinoda. Wow. They got the shapes include a microphone, a bass guitar, headphones, a skull, and a turntable. Wow. Pretty good. Wow. These look terrible. I will say everyone knows this, but I had Bon Bon again last night. Again. Everyone knows that? Everyone knows that I love the Swedish candy shop Bon Bon, and I relapsed again, got a bag late night.

19:47That's all right. 11 o 'clock while watching Love Island, and the good people at the Williamsburg Bon Bon hooked it up. They gave me a little bit extra. sympathy candy. But I think... Did you go in? No, I just ordered it on the internet. And then you said, I got hit by a bike last week. Can you give me some extra? Listen, Kevin, don't. I mean, you don't need to break down my relationship with Bon Bon and, you know, sort of my ins and my ties to the Swedish candy establishments. But just know that those people over there are doing the Lord's work, and they have made Haribo almost unedible for me because their candy is just so much...

20:22It's very good. Yeah, so So I can't talk about that. Mustard, DJ Mustard, didn't this Heinz Mustard thing come out like months ago? What happened? I have no idea. I just saw it's been getting some circulation this week. I guess probably because it's coming out or it's real. Oh, so it was like a mock-up before and now we're actually putting this out in some world. I mean, they claim to have a partnership rooted in the shared faith of a mustard seed. Yeah, 100%. but they claim to have made a new mustard for the first time in a while. Really? Yeah. Okay, I found that interesting. That was the claim I read.

20:57Okay. It's a yellow mustard, which I think is an underrated mustard. Yeah, they got another flavor, too. Oh, okay. So they're putting out new mustard. I think they got like a Chipotle mustard. So DJ Mustard has his new role with the brand as chief mustard officer is beginning to roll out condiments? Yeah. That's what you're saying? Well, this is where I should say, shout out to Ayo they launched Miso Mayo we didn't talk about that that's the fifth flavor there's no DJ that yells Miso when he when he does his tracks I guess you're right we need a DJ Miso but yeah one of my favorite Mayos from the Ayo line when we did our initial taste test back back back when we started the project yeah we're a design studio as well as podcasters for those that don't know I thought Miso was outstanding Yeah, it's good.

21:48It's a really solid flavor. It's a good one. Yeah. I also like miso dressing. Like it's green. I'm a pretty big miso enthusiast. You're a misogynist? You like miso? Yes, Kevin. That's exactly how I would put it. All right. That's a good internet joke. There you go. Boom, boom, boom. Clip it up. Put it on TikTok. Drizzy got abs, Kevin. Oh, yeah. You think those are real? I mean, here's what I think. They look fake. So I understand why people would question them. I have a hard time believing that if Drake actually had fake abs, that he would post them like this. Right? Like, what would... I just, I don't know.

22:31I just feel like if you have fake abs, you don't put them on display. Are you forgetting about BBL Drizzy? I guess so. I mean, I guess he's never shown a picture of his ass. That's true. We don't know. But this picture, also, another thing that's going on discussed on this photo is how many different liquors he has in his home. He's got like a... Bro loves to drink. I guess he just likes to booze. He likes to party, dude. Dude, I mean, he's pretty sick. You know, champagne poppy. So, weird photo, weird energy. People, a lot of speculation. It's kind of weird. It's just the only thing that looks to be worked on.

23:09His abs. Yeah, it's like, what was he just doing crunching? He just didn't do anything else in the gym. He's just been ripping crunches for a year since he's kind of been hiding because of the DJ mustard tracks. Yeah, I guess so. It is a way to come back, I guess, is check out my abs that I've been working on, but not doing any chest. Yeah, the chest looks, again, a little light considering all these ab workouts that he must be doing. Good for him. I can't put a guy down for working on his body. body shame other people i would kill to have those apps yeah real or fake uh listen my uh i got a notification from my iphone uh today that was like hey dude you're not really moving as much as you typically do you say i'm hurt and i was like yo chill out iphone you know your iphone should know that you took a massive impact i took a crash yeah my yeah my phone went flying everything went flying my airpods i had to go back to the scene of the crime and go find them scoop them Oh, really?

24:08Yeah, because I was in such a daze that I didn't - Were they there? They were there, yeah. Wow. So, yeah, I had to pick up my bracelet that ripped off of my hand. Did it cut you? Yeah, yeah. Oh, damn. Yeah, it fucked me up. But listen, I'm a soldier, and that's just what you need to know about me. Only three days off of work. Okay. What else happened, Kevin, while we were gone? The Travis Scott Erewhon smoothie. Dude, finally, a new Erewhon smoothie. Jesus Christ. The Storm Storm smoothie. Is that what it's called? Yeah, it's after his daughter, Stormy. God, I have a hard time with Travis Scott.

24:42I mean, listen, I've never been the biggest fan. But after watching that documentary, yeah, rough. Ten people fucking died. That's crazy. And there's some really, really awful texts where people were literally like, the stage is really full, right to the right side of the stage. We should stop the show. this isn't going to be great. Someone might die before the concert began. Like people knew, and there's a lot of people with blood on their hands and that is fucked. Like those poor, their kids too. Most of them are like in their early twenties. Some, some people as old as like 18, like people fucking, again, I don't want to get into it.