Dear Media Star Les Alfred on Going From Corporate Girlie to Six-Figure Influencer in 3 Years (and the Rebrand That Changed Everything)

22:14When I had left LA in 2023, I thought I was just going to travel and kind of nomad for a few months. And then I thought I was going to come back. And is that where your family's from? No, my family's in Seattle. So not far. So I had put all my stuff in storage the summer of 2023. I was just kind of traveling around. And I thought that at the end of 2023, I was going to move back to LA. That was my original intention. And where did you live in LA? I lived in Playa Vista. Okay. So even like that half hour you did was so close. It was also like really helpful. It was like literally two streets away from where you live.

22:46But yeah. Yes. Marina. Yeah. And so, but I ended up coming to New York because I had a friend of mine who was going to grad school. She needed someone to sublet her apartment for a little while until she figured out what she was going to do with it. And I was like, oh, it's fall. I've been traveling. Fall in New York sounds really fun. I never did the live in New York thing in your 20s. And so I thought, okay, I'll spend a month in New York. That's great. I came and then things just really started falling into place. I was making connections. I was making friends. I was building community. I just felt really good being here.

23:18I kept extending my time in her apartment until finally I just had to be honest with myself and be like, I actually don't feel pulled to go back to LA. I feel pulled to stay here. And I don't know why that is, but I'm just going to do it. And so I ended up like manifesting an apartment really easily and just staying. You talk about manifesting so eloquently. How does someone listening to this manifest that same dream life that they have for themselves as well as you do? Yeah. I think it comes from not being attached to a certain outcome and also not being attached to how things come to be. Because if you would have told me maybe three years ago that I would be living in New York, I probably would have had a picture of that that would have looked entirely different.

24:03I probably would have assumed that I would still going to be in corporate working in an office every day. Three years ago, you three years ago, I probably would have thought that if you would have told me, you know, in 2025, you're going to be living in New York, that's probably what I would have thought. And so detaching from the stories of how we think things are going to go is really helpful. I also had this idea in my head, even when I decided that I wanted to stay in New York that apartment hunting is so hard, which it is. Finding an apartment in New York is crazy. But sometimes you can get lucky, no pun intended, and it doesn't have to be.

24:33And so what ended up happening with me was the building that I was staying in that I was subletting from my friend's unit, they had another unit open up the day that I needed to be out of her place. And so I just moved. Literally a door over. A door over. And I didn't have to apartment hunt. I didn't have to do anything crazy because I was just open to letting things unfold how they could unfold. We hear a lot of the negatives of living in New York, obviously. And one of the ones that I'm not pervy to being in LA is like this New York City influencer culture. Walk me through like your perception of New York City influencer culture.

25:08Yeah. I think I wouldn't say that I'm super connected to what most people would consider New York City influencer culture, because I think a lot of it is generational. I think when people think negatively about New York City influencers. They have a perception of a Gen Z girl who is living in a very particular part of the city. And all she does is drink matcha and go to Pilates, which I would say even of the little bit of time that I've spent around those girls, they definitely don't just do that. But that's the perception. But I do think for me, not being in my 20s, being in my 30s, having corporate experience and just moving in different spaces, I can say that there are definitely a lot of influencers who don't fit that mold, who are very community oriented and live all types of different lives.

25:56But isn't that you think that's such an unfair stereotype that's put onto like an entire city of like, that is not how everybody and I think the reason I'm asking that question is because so often in our life, take away the word influencer, but we're typecasted into a specific group because of where we live or what we do or what people think of you. And so breaking out of that mold is incredibly difficult when all of that drama is going around and you're like, well, I'm technically an influencer. I technically live in New York City, but I don't like subscribe to that. How do you what advice would you give to somebody that's also feeling like they're typecasted into one thing and they're trying to break out of that to build a life that's so much different than what people just assume they are.

26:38Yeah. I think a lot of it comes down to kind of what I was saying earlier about money is like knowing your values and being firmly rooted in who you are, being okay with letting people be wrong about you. Because especially if people only see you on the other side of a screen, there's only so much that they're going to be able to decipher. And we're all dynamic beings who have so much more to us than what people see, you know on social media and I also think it's important to look at okay well how do people who are actually in your life feel about you how would they describe you how did they see you the people who you're around every day and you interact with like that is so much more important I think than somebody who might look at what you're sharing or might glance at you for a second and come up with a preconceived notion dating in New York okay what is that like I I don't think that dating in New York has been super different from dating anywhere else I've lived.

27:30What is dating right now like? Dating right now like? Okay, well, right now I feel like I'm in a weird spot because I've been dating someone for several months and recently ended it. Okay. And I haven't gotten back into it. Congratulations. Thank you. Yes. I actually am really happy about that and I'm very proud of myself. Was it the guy that I met at that event? Oh, what event? No, no, no, no. I I wasn't dating anyone here. I think he maybe was interested in me. Yeah. I was like, I kind of felt bad because I saw you and I was so excited. I was like, no, that's fine. And then you guys were kind of having this really cute conversation.

28:02And I was like, wait, did I just fuck up this like moment for them? You didn't. I had a really awkward interaction with him maybe two weeks after that event because I was out with the guy that I was dating and he was at the same place. Anyway, it was like a whole thing. Okay. The world is very small. You even think in a big city, it's not that big. But I'm actually really proud of myself for that situation because I've actually learned how to move on from things, not move on from things quicker, to end something quicker if I know it's not working. And when I was younger, I had a lot of scenarios where I would date people and I would know either this isn't my person, this isn't how I want to feel, this isn't serving me, and I would just stay with them just because.

28:42and I feel like my dating experiences most recently when I get that gut feeling where I'm like actually this isn't a bad person but they're just not this isn't what I want from partnership this isn't where I need to be I'm learning how to act on that a lot quicker and I'm very proud of myself do you feel like that's because you have a very abundance mindset like there's gonna be somebody for me because I think a lot of girls I can speak from my own experience being with people for a very long time, like I would ignore those feelings or those signs because I was like, well, what if there's not somebody that's better?

29:16How do you move through that in terms of having that and training that abundance mindset? Because it sounds like you're training that. It is. And it's something that I've been doing in real time because I also have done exactly what you described. And I very much felt that way before. And I had to remind myself, girl, you always end up meeting somebody else though. That hasn't been a problem. What is the problem with dating then right now? I think, well, in my experience, it's just either been a misalignment of priorities, a misalignment of like what it is that you want or just compatibility. It's so interesting though, because I actually like love asking my guests when I do an ask me anything on my page.

29:56I get a lot of girls that are these, we call them HSR girls. They're ambitious, they're driven, they have a vision, they know who they are, they are like a freaking dream. They're beautiful inside and out. They are intelligent. They can carry a conversation. They know their value. They know their worth. And I think there is a genuine conversation going on right now around this dating crisis. And I remember hearing that and being really scared before I, you know, found my partner. And I also still remember being like, it's not going to happen to me. Like I've always had that mindset where like I saw my future, I saw my success.

30:28And I was like, that is going to be where I'm going to go. But I think a lot of the time women specifically that are listening to this conversation of like men are falling behind and like even graduation rates for men are slowing down. Like they're not earning as much money when you are an HSR girl, as I would call you like that can be terrifying because you're like, is somebody going to be able to keep up with me. Do you find that you are afraid of finding somebody that can level you up? Or like, do you feel like people that you're dating are threatened by what the world is that you've built?

31:04I've experienced both. I would say I've definitely experienced people who are like haters. I've definitely dated some haters and had to cut that loose. But I also have had experiences where I've dated really great men who are really supportive. And even though those relationships didn't work out. The way I think of it is like proof of concept of actually, I also know that there are men out here who are also successful, not threatened by what I've got going on. And if he didn't feel that way, I'm sure that someone else will be able to do the same thing who's a better fit for me. Yeah. My therapist told me something that was so amazing when I first started dating my boyfriend now because I was so afraid.

31:41He was so good. And I was like, you know, and it's so good. You're just like, well, when's it going to all fall apart? And my therapist said to me, this is your new standard. Knowing how you've been treated now, you will never go for less. And there will always be people that will treat you at that level. And I think for me, what I've realized is as much as I have that gut intuition, and I think we both have that unspoken it factor of being able to figure things out for yourself, I also did have to build an ecosystem of people around me. My sister is my business partner, my therapist, cutting certain friends out of my life, having a personal board of advisors, when you're dealing with bigger questions, whether it's your career, whether it's dating, like who do you go for and how did you know that they were the right people to put into that role in your life?

32:27For sure. I think it's really important to know who to go to for what, because I have had friends from, you know, elementary school onward who are still a part of my life who I love dearly. But I know that if I I do have a friend who maybe if I'm thinking about work has really negative ideas about money. I don't cut that friend out by any means, but I don't go talk to her about money. I don't go talk to her about what's going on in my business. We can talk about other things that we maybe have in common, but I will go to my other peers who I know are in a similar situation and have been through similar things and have a similar mindset to get their perspectives.

33:03Do you feel like in that when you're going around the business conversation, right? Like it's so interesting being coming from the startup world. We're all trying to work together. And it's like the first thing that they say to do when you're starting a startup is like go talk to other startup founders. And like everyone always asks me, how do I meet venture capitalists? How do I raise money for my business? And I'm like, don't cold call. Don't cold email. Go to a founder. See who they've raised money from. Be helpful to them. Like literally give them advice. Give them things for free. And then when it's a good, appropriate time and you feel like you've given to that relationship, like ask for an introduction.

33:34And that is the best way to meet a VC. So the startup environment is very collaborative. People are there to help each other. It's interesting now being an influencer and wearing that hat where I do sometimes feel like people have that scarcity mindset. They don't wanna share that connection. They don't wanna talk about what they're actually making. They don't wanna share downloads. Like, that's what I love. Then you're just like, it's 10 ,000 downloads to start monetizing because people, what I've realized, they're so afraid to like have that collaboration. Do you get that same sense? like in the circles that you run in?

34:07Or is that something where like, it just doesn't even come up in conference? Like people are just willing to help you. That's a good question. I think I am really fortunate to have people who are willing to help me, but I do think it's taken a while to get there, especially as a creator. And I think when you're first starting off as a creator, it can be very lonely and very isolating because it's you and your phone trying to figure out what to do, what you're doing. What the fuck I'm doing today? Yeah, but as you go and as you start to occupy more spaces and you're around other people, you do start to get a feel for who is for a community and who's not.

34:42Honestly, I think having a podcast has been one of the best tools. Like you interviewed Melinda French Gates and other incredible people. How does that come to be and how does that make you feel to give in the privilege to do that? So again, lucky, no pun intended. But what's interesting is even the opportunities to do those things have all come from people I knew. So I got to do the interview with Melinda Gates because a friend of mine from Seattle works for her organization. They were doing some promo for Melinda's book here in New York. And so Jess reached out to me and said, hey, are you available?

35:14I'd love to include you in this event we're doing with Melinda. I did something very similar with Michelle Obama several years ago. You interviewed Michelle Obama? I did. I did. This was back in 2019. Teach me or teach me. No, I got so lucky. So how that came to be was I had organized this book club back when I was still living in Seattle when she came out with her first memoir. And I had, you know, put out on Instagram, like, hey, I'm reading this book. If you want to come talk about it, come to this place. I got like a little sponsor and we did our little book club. The next day I'm walking to work and one of my coworkers who had previously worked for President Obama was like, hey, I'm on the team organizing Michelle Obama's book tour.

35:53And she likes to meet with groups at every tour stop she does. you just did a book club. Would your group want to meet her before her Seattle tour stopped? And I was like, girl, absolutely. And then that's how that came to be. It's like always people that I know connecting me with these amazing opportunities. And I'm so grateful. But I think it's also you not being afraid to share what you're doing. And that's actually a hump I've recently gotten over. Like I have these things called like toxic traits of hot, smart, rich girls. And it's like thinking people are mad at you, like get anxiety about the unknown.

36:23And just like, even for me, I've had so much anxiety about sharing all the amazing, wonderful things that I've built. I don't even know why. And I think it's like, if that's not the sign to put yourself out there and what you're doing on social media, like there couldn't be something that could be more obvious. Like you've interviewed two of the most, let's quote unquote say like powerful people in America, powerful women in America, just by putting it out there and people seeing that and bringing you the opportunity. Is that why you rebranded your podcast? to She's So Lucky or walk us through like having a balanced black girl as your podcast cover is a very specific brand.

37:00Navigating now to She's So Lucky, where did that change come from? Yeah. I mean, I started the show under the name Balanced Black Girl in 2018. And when I started podcasting, the name was the first thing that I thought of because at that time I had a fitness blog and the fitness blog was called The Balance Berry. So when I first started creating content almost a decade ago. That was the name. And so I had talked a lot about balance. And it was this idea because in the 2010s, the wellness space was it's very like restrictive, very diet culturey. I was talking a lot about how do we find balance while still taking care of ourselves?

37:35How can we care about fitness without over exercising? How can we care about food without being restrictive? And so balance had been a theme in my content for the first several years that I'd been a creator. And so when I decided to sunset that old blog, I had created Balance Black Girl. I wanted to spotlight women of color in wellness because having been in the wellness space at that time, and I was also a personal trainer, I just felt like it was very male heavy. And I just felt like I wasn't able to learn from people who could share my lived experiences. And so that was really the start of the podcast.

38:04And it was very science-y and it was very wellness heavy. Over time, I started to skew more towards lifestyle content and doing less episodes that were like, let's invite this black woman GI doctor to give us an hour long debrief on gut health. That was like what the show used to be to how can we share stories of this really interesting entrepreneur, this interesting creative and how she's created her own success. And my audience really liked it. And that was when things really started growing. And so when I rebranded earlier this year, a lot of it was around, okay, how can I repackage the show to better match what it's now about?

38:40Because when I first started it, it was just entirely different. It was very wellness oriented. And it was just very specifically a wellness show. And as it evolved to be more of a self-help lifestyle show, I felt like I needed to repackage it to better match that theme. Were you afraid of letting go of the old name, of like even people being confused? How did you walk the consumer through a large change like that? Yeah, I was super nervous about it. But I also, in my gut, felt like it was the right thing to do. And so my whole approach was to just over-communicate it. So it was about three months before I knew the rebrand was going to go live.

39:16I did it. I rebranded officially in March of 2025. This year. Yeah. So three months before that, I started communicating with my audience on the podcast and on social that the name was going to be changing, that things were going to be updated. and I would show them little sneak peeks of whether that was like hints of the new branding or why I was choosing to rebrand or all of these different things. And I was just over communicating. I was talking about it so much. One, to try to avoid that confusion so that they knew that the old name was going away. And two, so that they felt like they were a part of it.

39:50And so I actually got a lot of support through the rebrand because people were just so excited because I had been talking about it for three months straight. they were probably ready for me to shut up about it honestly. Well, that's actually like one of the things that I get so nervous about. And like, I got really good advice from a founder of mine that was like, overuse your assets, overwork your assets. Like I sometimes feel like I repeat the same thing so many times, but then I'm like, people actually miss, we're so tuned into what we're doing. But like the biggest secret of life is that nobody gives a fuck about what you're doing, which is like a blessing and a curse, right?

40:22So that if nobody gives a fuck about you, you have to like beat it down the door until people start to care about you. But on the flip side, you almost get into your own head because you're like, I've talked about this so much that like, I don't know if people are annoyed for this to be done yet. Yeah. And it's the reality is people see a fraction of what we do. Yeah. And so you have to over communicate things because people have stuff going on. They forget you can get shadow banned. People don't see it. So over communication is key. And is that when you were doing the rebrand, like as you are bringing on a branding agency or you're finding a freelancer, was that something that like Dear Media was helping you with?

40:56or they just trusted your vision and they were like, okay, yeah, we're gonna like support you, but we're not actually gonna be helping you put the pieces together. It was a combination of both. And it was really whatever I wanted to do. I have a designer who I've worked with for several years who she and I have done so many projects together and we just like get each other. And so I did enlist her to create the branding and the visual style guide and just what I wanted because I like love working with her. And then I did bring elements of that over to the network and say, hey, these are the images we like.

41:28These are the fonts that we're using. And so I collaborated with the network on the cover art and then the rest of the branding I had worked on with my own team. If someone's listening to this and they wanna launch their own podcast, it's so interesting to hear that you started very niche because I think a lot of the time we hear like niche down so you can find your people and then you can kind of evolve and grow it. But on the flip side, you're saying that like the show really started growing when you went more in that like lifestyle now like she's so lucky branding. if somebody is listening to this that wants to start a podcast, what advice would you have for them to cut through the noise?

42:01Yeah, I don't think that people need to be as niche as they used to, because I think especially with podcasting, the way people listen to and consume podcasts is entirely different. In 2018, when I started, podcasts were very niche. They were audio only. A lot less people were listening to them. They were very specific versus now podcasting is very normal. Everybody listens to a podcast. Everybody has their different shows and rotations and things that they like. So I don't think people necessarily need to niche down, but I do think they need to be very clear on what their show is about. And I think where a lot of people get tripped up about podcasting is they think, oh, I just like to talk or me and my friend are so funny, so we're going to start a show.

42:44And that's great. And you can do that if you want it to be a hobby. But if you want to have an audience, you need to have a position, you need to have a message. And that message can be flexible, but it needs to be about something. Why would somebody who doesn't know you want to listen to this? A thousand percent. I actually have a prediction that I think almost most people that are trying to build a personal brand will have a podcast because it's just a way to like really engage with your consumer in a way that like they intimately know you. And I've even noticed that since doing the podcast, like people know so many more details about my life and like my opinions than I would ever put on social media.

43:16But I think one of the things that people don't realize is that having a podcast is a huge investment unlike social media that is free to put this together to rent a studio to get mics to get the videos like this is not cheap and so I think before and people have always said this to me they were like why did you wait to start a podcast for so long like and people had been asking for it two years before I even did it and I was like I'm not in the financial position or ready to spend my money that way I'm still building my brand as an investor I'm still making investments like bringing on people into my team like we're just not ready and I think it's such a huge opportunity for people but it has to be the right time for things speaking of time we are running out of time because I could talk to you forever I need to do some rapid fire with you if that's okay okay I'm excited um okay let's start with your favorite podcast that's not yours my favorite podcast that's not mine what have I what What did I listen to most recently?

44:14I mean, I do love the To Be Magnetic ladies. And so I feel like I listen to that one probably the most often. Okay. Who is your favorite comfort creator that you just put on at the end of the day when you're exhausted? My favorite comfort creator? Oh, my goodness. Probably her name is Kristen. I think her handle is House Chris. Okay. She's on Instagram and TikTok. She's the girl who always does the Diet Coke breaks. I've never seen this. Really? This is why I love the show because then I like have more people to go and creep. But you know who I just followed this morning that's from I think she's from New York.

44:44Who? There was this, you know, this trend on TikTok that's like how you send a picture of your bag to your boyfriend, your husband, and you're like, how many likes and comments like for this to happen? And some people are like just sending it directly to the Chanel store. Some people are like 50 ,000 likes, like 10 ,000 comments, whatever. Clark saw this video of this girl who was like to her husband to be. What would it take for you to buy me these two coach bags? and he makes her literally jump through hoops. And so Clark buys her both of the bags. He's like carrying it on the street. She's like, we are doing none of that.

45:15And sir, like you need to make sure you are treating your wifey correctly. And I was like immediate follow. And actually she was my 444 follow. Really? Which is like a big number for me. So I'm now obsessed with her. No, Clark is amazing. I've been following her for years. She's great. Okay, would you rather dress or pants? Pants. Morning or night? Morning. LA or New York? Ew. right now in New York. But not forever, it sounds like. Maybe not forever. Okay. There are things about LA that I love, and I could maybe see a future chapter of my life maybe when I'm more ready to settle down being in LA.

45:50Okay. You can only choose one for the rest of your life. Coffee, tea, or a cocktail. Oh, coffee. What's your order? For sure. I mean, usually just a latte. If they have lavender, I'll do a lavender latte. Oh, same, actually. Love that. Walk or Uber? Walk. Okay, I love that. And then hot or cold? Hot. Hot, for sure. Oh my God. Well, you're not missing any of that in New York. It's very hot here right now. Les Alfred, thank you so much for coming on. My audience always wants to know how they can help you. So like, what are you doing right now? Are you hiring? Are you like, what are you promoting?

46:24What are the things that they can consume of yours? And where can they find you? Yeah. I mean, the best thing they can do is come over and listen to She's So Lucky. So it's stories of women who create their own luck. So it's everywhere you get your podcasts. New episodes every Tuesday. Amazing. Thank you guys so much for listening and go follow less.

46:50That's the sound of the fully electric Audi Q6 e-tron and the quiet confidence of ultra smooth handling. The elevated interior reminds you this is more than an EV. This is electric performance redefined. What are you hoping to see by 2050? And this is quite a statement. I think we will certainly have demonstrated that space-based solar power can be done and that you can have not just detectable power, but useful power transmitted from space to Earth. Today, I'm joined by Lauren Lyons. She's an incredibly accomplished aerospace consultant, engineer, former SpaceX and Blue Origin mission lead. Join me, Chris Hadfield, on the On Energy podcast.

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