Building a Legacy with Ayesha and Stephen Curry

24:04Craig Robinson:When, over the course of the date, Aisha, did you feel like, ooh. There was a moment when… I mean we were two young kids. We were just doing… It was silly. When we were looking for the donuts. Oh yeah. In the… It was like a typical… We were looking in cop cars to see if they had donuts. What? We were kids. And I think the way that we were laughing with each other and how we just got a kick out of such a ridiculous situation. I was like, oh my gosh, I really like him. But I didn't, this is another thing that gets misconstrued. People for some reason think that in the past, I've said that he wasn't my type.

24:49Craig Robinson:Yeah. But what I was saying was, I didn't think I was his type. Yeah. Because this was Mr. Cool. Yeah. And so I kind of sold myself short and thinking like, oh, there's no way. He must just like me as a friend. Aisha. So I won't even take it back. Aisha. I'm glad it didn't. Aisha. She left the door open. I'm glad I didn't get friend zone. I was, I'm, I would have to say. Every time I texted her call, she picked up the phone after that. After I was on full course friend zone. After that date, for sure. Yeah, yeah. See, we, we, we guys know that y 'all in charge. So. When I finally realized that that was the direction it was going in.

25:35I verbalized that to him that I was confused because if there's one thing I'm going to do I'm going to speak my mind yeah but he looked at me because he had come to my house for two weeks straight at the time my parents' house she thought I just said we're an engagement with her brother he's like you think I've been coming over here every night for the past two weeks to play video games with your brothers I was like oh he's like that makes a lot of sense I'm glad it all happened days for sure it was a beautiful uh kind of reconnection at that yeah well it's it's really interesting to hear that story and then see you guys now with all the stuff you've got going on kids businesses you know you're still playing you're doing your everything all the stuff and you guys feel like, at least it's my perception from the outside looking in, that you work really well together.

26:35Can you talk about that relationship now, how that's evolved given how you met? Well, from my perspective, the biggest thing is we've learned each other as we've gone through, you know, even when things get a little rocky or, you know, there's obstacles you have to go over, people feel stressed out or, you know, overwhelmed or whatever the case are, we're we're always working towards the same goal of being there for each other. And I think that's been such a rewarding experience through these 15 years, almost 15 years of marriage. And, and also acknowledging like you don't know everything either.

27:09And you're still learning. You're still learning. You're still growing. And, and trying to have humility through that. I think we try to also approach all of this from like a, it's just us mentality and realizing like, even with the kids, The kids are going to grow up and they're going to leave us. And so we always come back to center with each other and even with all of the business. And yes, we're going to try to make an impact. We're going to try to do decent things in the world. But at the end of the day, all of this is so fleeting. And so making sure that we, at the center of it all, realize that it's us in this together.

27:52We've vowed to do this together. from day one. And so as long as we keep that, I think that's kind of what's kept us going.

28:01Craig Robinson:Ayesha, I love that you are plain spoken in life and sort of like me, sometimes, you know, you're stating what feels like the obvious sometimes in life, and then people interpret that the wrong way, right? And, you know, I love your vulnerability and your honesty. because I think that's what helps people. You know, it's like, it's one thing to be hashtag relationship goals, but it's another to tell the truth about what it takes. And I tend to do that when I talk about the challenges of marriage and that it's not all that. It's like, I love my husband. I like my husband, you know, but we also want to be a part of helping couples understand that it does take work and it is hard, even in the best marriages.

28:55Craig Robinson:And can you talk a little bit more about that? Knowing that this is a safe space of not judgment, everybody understands humility and blessings, but it takes work. And so you don't want to give up on something when it starts to get hard in the way that it's naturally going to be. Yeah, I think anything great takes work. Yeah. So I agree with that. I think we're living in this age right now of everybody wants to romanticize everything. And that's a beautiful thing. But I think it's unrealistic in marriage at times. Because growth is inevitable and change is inevitable. And I think that's a beautiful thing.

29:42Like if you expect it to stay the same for 15, 20 years, like that's not… That's so sad. It's sad. Then there's a problem. Yeah. So. So we don't run away from the tension on the daily of like, again, I think I heard somebody say like neither one of us can quit on the same day as a philosophy of understanding. You should know your significant other than the best and understand, you know, when they might be, when they might need a little pick me up or you to carry a little bit more of the load or vice versa. I subscribe to that philosophy, but also like the tension in the daily, like we try not to run away from it.

30:25You run towards it because you know that that's going to help you get to that next level of, I don't know, togetherness or just the seasons of life that kind of come at you. And so for us, if you feel like something's not, if your marriage is not perfect, you're probably right and that's okay. No, nobody's is. Nobody's is.

30:47Craig Robinson:let's talk about how you're raising the kids the values, how you're thinking about what kind of people you want them to be are you parenting the girls differently and the boys are babies it's an interesting dynamic with the two older girls and the two younger boys I'm grateful that the girls arrived first because when the boys is get to the girl's age now. I feel like you'll be done playing and it's very important to me for them to have him around more. Very important. And so I'm just grateful that that's how it worked out. But it is, parenting's hard. Like we're - Sure is. Especially now we have a 13-year-old.

31:37She's going to go to high school next year. We're doing the whole high school thing. Are you scared of her yet?

31:41Craig Robinson:Is she scary? Yeah, I am. and I'm in a need shoot these next couple of years. I'm here. It gets, because sometimes, well, Barack got scared, you know, he got scared off. Sasha, the feisty one, was very scary to her father. There's a lot of scoreboard washing going on in our house, I call it, where, why can't I do that? And why can't, oh, and how you parent, you have to parent each one of them a little different. Right. For sure. As the older they get, the more they notice that. You know, It means something at all these stages to just have these honest conversations where your kids can disagree with you.

32:25Craig Robinson:They can point out stuff because it's like, I think that gave us the confidence that when you're out there and at some point you've got to advocate for yourself in life. Oh, for sure. Right. And if you don't feel like you've been taught to advocate for yourself at home, then where do you get the practice of speaking up for yourself and demanding a level of respect and then how to do it? All of that stuff is practice at home around the table, which doesn't require any money. It doesn't require... My parents didn't go to college. They weren't wealthy and connected, but they had just a baseline common sense and a respect for us as humans that just sort of came through.

33:14Craig Robinson:And I say that to all parents because we sit here very privileged, right, with resources and so on and so forth. But we were raised in a little bitty apartment with a mother that stayed home and a father that was a pump engineer at the water filtration plant all his life. I think he never had rarely got a new car you know we went on one family vacation every year and drove to this Duke's Happy Holiday Resort we did not have resources but we had parents who fundamentally liked us in the same way that you build that like relationship in a marriage it's like your kids have to know that you like who they are truly for themselves.

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38:36Craig Robinson:I want to ask particularly, how you doing? I mean... How am I doing? Yes, because you have a lot on your plate and you're doing it well. Thank you. I had more on my plate and it came to a head where I was like, okay, I got to lay it all out and figure out what do I really love? What is important to me? What do I value? And so I've like really streamlined things, I'd say over the past three, four years. but I'm doing really well. I feel like I'm kind of in a, I don't want to say the word smooth sailing because I don't want to jinx myself in the parenting department. You'll be doing that until you're 60.

39:23The parenting situation is feeling really good. You know, we had our fourth and so I'm feeling comfortable in my body again. I'm feeling more like myself and that's such a good feeling. and also like allows me to be a better parent in some strange way because I feel like I know who I am again. And so that's been really great.

39:49Craig Robinson:How do you carve out the space to take care of yourself in the midst of it all? I never used to do it and now I just make it a priority. I don't know how else to say it. I put it on the calendar. I make it a priority and I get it done. Oftentimes now, even just for getting my body moving and getting outside. I just bring the baby along with me and we get it done. But I find I have to like be outside multiple times a week. I notice a difference from a mental health perspective. And so… Because you can be with four kids. It's like you could be in the house forever. And they have so much going on themselves.

40:33Craig Robinson:The house or the car. I know every time we talk to you all, You all are in the car. The first meeting we had, or the first call we had. We were in the back of the car. I was like, do they live in the car? We were at a soccer game. We were trying to go to the fence. It was a soccer game. And I was like, we got it. Brock and I, go to watch the game. We were at the soccer game. We were in the Sprinter. And the kids were so mad at us because they don't like when we bring the Sprinter to school because it's embarrassing. Really? Are you kidding? Oh, they're so amazing. Oh, my goodness. They just want to be regular people.

41:12See, Austin and Aaron are like, can we get a Sprinter now?

41:17Craig Robinson:That's until their parents come out of one. I mean, Malia and Sasha never wanted Barack to come to their stuff with the presidential motorcade. You talk about a Sprinter? Yeah. That's a different one. I mean, they're just like, they just don't come. Oh, yeah. Don't come. Why are those men on the roof with machine guns? but they don't like the sprinter, huh? No. The girls don't. They don't at all. How do you manage integrating into normal parent life? I know that was something that we had to work on. I mean, how do you make your kids feel normal, I guess? It's a challenge for sure. worried about sleep overnights or extracurriculars, especially with Riley.

42:06She wants to be a little bit more independent. Can you drop me off here and do this? Meeting new parents and not making it a big deal, but making sure there's boundaries around how we move so that we feel safe. If we feel safe, then it allows us to take that necessary step, I feel like, to allow your kid to explore. You want them to be curious and it's just showing up, I think is the biggest deal that you meet people, you meet parents. We do try to, in terms of like, especially for sports activities, school activities, that type of thing where for our kids and seeing like, that's how, normal is a weird word, but that's a normal experience.

42:48Like we're going to be at your game. We're going to be loud, yelling, going crazy. We're going to be embarrassing you after your theater production performance. Yes, yes, we do do that. We do all of that. Pride in ourselves. And celebrate them, right? I think we try to do that. The social part of it, there's challenges. There's considerations that we never thought we'd have to make or take to make sure, you know, you can let your kids kind of go out and thrive. But part of that, too, is, again, still learning because every year is a little different. It's all so weird. It is weird. I think we're doing a good job of allowing them to feel very normal.

43:35I don't know how y 'all did it to the point of…

43:39Craig Robinson:You know, it's all the same thing, you know. Like the girls growing up, they didn't want people to come to their house, the White House, because it felt like it's not a normal house. And I was like, I guarantee you, your friends want to come. They want to watch a movie in the movie theater. It's like, why would somebody want to come here? And I was like, but they do. So it took them a second to kind of understand that it's not, it isn't normal from where they came from in Chicago, but it is their normal. And I think it's like everything, our kids reacted the way we reacted. So if we showed up special, you know, if we just showed up and was like, look the other way, we're just here, it's not a big deal, you know, then slowly they followed suit.

44:35And I also found that the school environment followed suit. I said, they meet you where you're here. Yeah, yeah.

44:41Craig Robinson:They meet your energy. You know. You'd hope so. Yeah, it's wonderful. and just watching kids develop, giving them what we can. It is a joy to go to practice every day with my old self and rickety bones. But it's really been a treat. You won't even be as old as him. I know, you'll be able to get out there and show him some things. I show him that I can shoot just for some credibility. And then that's it. one of the kids one of the kids asked me today he was so I mean these are high school kids right he's a senior and he's like hey coach Robinson can you still get up there and dunk and I felt I felt bittersweet you know it was nice of him to think that I could dunk but not being able to dunk anymore was the bitter part it's like can you still jump yeah and speaking of basketball how did you guys decide to do GOAT?

45:49How did that all come about?

45:50Craig Robinson:Because your team was kind enough to let us take a look at that. It's coming out today. It's out today. Today. I know we're dating this. It's out today. It's so good. Thank you so much. It's been a seven-year journey, to be honest. Yeah. Animation takes forever. Animation takes forever. And then that initial process of working with the Sony Animation and Sony Studios. we had an initial meeting and then the idea of having an animated story that was sports related and brought me in basketball in an all animal world was kind of just a starting point and my favorite part about the whole thing is there's something for the entire family comedy is high paced high action the visuals are stunning in the all animal world and Aisha is the she's Carol the diner who's always looking out for him.

46:47When you guys were sort of working through this, was it always you were going to be in it as well? No. How did that come about? Because you all are darn right good at it. I was drafting over her because I've never done voice acting and she's been acting her whole life. And so when we had the opportunity to do some of the characters and look at how we were filling out the team And Lenny the giraffe was the exact opposite of me as a player and a person. He's like the laid back, kind of not really focused, just kind of there. He's been cast around the entire Roarball League. He's played for 10 different teams in 10 years.

47:26He likes music more than he likes Roarball. He wants to rap. He wants to rap. There's a little bit more on the nose for the culinary kind of connection for Carol the diner. But that whole, I don't know how you felt from the voice acting perspective. It was so much fun. It's so different from being on your traditional set. There's a lot that goes into the voice work. I wanted to have a different voice so badly. You wanted to completely change your voice. To change your voice. What would have been your voice? I want to hear what you wanted. I gave them a sample. And they looked at me after. and they were like, just, I think your regular voice will suffice.

48:10Wait, give us a little take of it. I was at a time. I wanted to be like, you don't get any time. Or, maybe have a Jamaican accent and be like, hey, waga, waga. Welcome, welcome. They were like, no.

48:28Craig Robinson:Your regular voice was great. Thank you. Well, your regular voice was great. Congratulations. Thank you very much. Way to go. All right, Just another thing on their caps. How is it working together? I mean, I work with my husband sometimes. You know, I mean, you are essentially two principals. For sure. Right? I mean, it's not like Aisha's your supporting cast. She's got her own thing. Maybe I should ask Aisha. Yeah. How do you break through the noise of him as you were working to assert what you want your vision to stay seen in it all? Because you have definitely done that. And I know it's more than a notion to do that.

49:22Yeah, I think that's an interesting question. Very multi-pronged. But I think, do I like working with him? Absolutely. I love it. We shot a show years ago called About Last Night. And we had so much fun on set together. I think where it gets dicey for me is where I never want to feel like I'm inserting myself or like just being thrown into the mix. I think because I work so hard and sometimes I do feel like I have a point to prove. And so I like to be able to kind of stand on my own two feet sometimes. But I feel like he's always been so gracious about either bringing me along or hyping me up or like truly putting me on a pedestal even when I don't want to be up there.

50:18And he's been so great about just being such a support system for me and truly like my partner in crime. he's never been like, stand back here, stand right here. It's always like, no, you're going to stand right here with me. And I think that to me is very romantic. So I love that he's always done that for me and been that person for me, kind of my confidence when it's maybe lacking in myself.

50:47Craig Robinson:And it gets easier over time. I mean, I've been saying this a lot. It's like, I'm 62 now. And it wasn't until my 50s that I felt like I could claim what I know. I understand. And I think that may be a woman thing, right? I mean, men are encouraged to, you know, like, you're a man at 20. It's like, you don't know anything. I mean, you both were the men in high school. You didn't know anything. You know, but you're handed that, you know, you're encouraged to be that. Right. Whereas us as women, we're always second guessing ourselves and wondering, he doesn't really like me. And we don't get to make the first move sometimes in life, you know, and I'm trying to figure out what that is, because it's not that I wasn't confident.

51:41Craig Robinson:But it took me a while to be like, I know what I'm talking about.

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55:02you guys are both so accomplished at such a young age what have you learned from Aisha and Aisha what have you learned from Stefan um I've learned from Aisha what true like ambition and passion really looks like on a daily basis. And that's not just career-wise, that's for your family. She lives every day with her full self. And I know it's scary and vulnerable at times because you want to kind of protect yourself. And she puts herself out there. And I'm a little bit more reserved in that respect. And that fire, I wish I had more of it. I can get there on the court and like, you know, you have those moments, but on a daily basis, like I'm a little bit more kind of even keel and I wish I had that instinct, like just, she has that on a daily basis.

56:03And it motivates me just, you know, on when things can get a little drag or, you know, things aren't really going your way or there's not really a clear path to get what you want. Like that fire and that passion is a big deal. I definitely have learned a little bit from the way that she shows up in that way. That's a lot from a guy who's got four championships. It's different.

56:28Craig Robinson:Well, that's all he's got. No, I'm just, I'm messing with you, Stefan. I think I've learned from him on the flip side or what I'd like. What was it? What I'd like from you? Learn from what I've learned from you. I think on the flip side of what he said about me, for me, he is so even keeled. And he can compartmentalize really big emotions very well. And he does know how to block out the noise. And so I've learned little by little I think how to do more of that because like you said, I'm very passionate and fiery and sometimes it works but sometimes it doesn't and vice versa. And then I think I've learned this unwavering work ethic.

57:21I've never seen anything like it, but it obviously manifests itself in how things work out for him in his basketball career. I'm like, tomorrow he'll be up 6.30, you know, working on himself when he doesn't necessarily have to. And so I've just year after year after year seen him do things when he doesn't have to. And then I see the results that come from that and it's extremely inspiring.

57:53Craig Robinson:Oh my God. Yeah. Thank you. Let's bottle some of that up and sprinkle it over the man.

58:07Craig Robinson:That's very sweet. Thank you. I'm so proud of you too. Stop, stop, stop. All right. We're going to do the listener question because the listener question will lead to a little more discussion. Yeah. Yeah. So our question today is from Vivian in Raleigh, North Carolina. Oh, Vivian. Shout out. I am the first of three children, two girls and one boy. It always seems I'm the mother of everyone. From my parents to my siblings, then to my spouse and 12-year-old. I recently lost my dad, so it's been very hard on my mom. She wants me to call daily and respond to all the texts daily. I love my entire family and I want to be there for them.

59:00Craig Robinson:But I'm also a registered nurse and I owe it to my pediatric patients and their families to give them excellent care. I am working to go back to school, to become a family nurse practitioner, or go to medical school. I feel I am not enough, but my husband believes that I am smart and I can do all things through Christ. I am also a precinct official, thanks to your book. Now they want me to take on more responsibilities and face gripping me. But I really want to do more. I was privileged to go canvassing with my daughter, Knocking on Doris. She was so excited about doing what Mrs. Obama did with her dad.

59:55Craig Robinson:My question is, how can I juggle all this and still look fly, be a great daughter, sister, wife, and the mom. I don't even know where to start. The first thing that comes to mind for me is like thinking of the cups and not these cups, but how they say you can't pour from an empty cup. And I think for women, I think that statement is false because generally women have many cups. There are many cups we're dealing with. And so I, like my, is it advice or would be... Your opinion. My opinion. Yes, that's right. Would be, I mean, also as women, we tend to ruminate on things when we're in a different situation, thinking about all the other things that need to go on.

1:00:51And so I think my opinion would be to realize, separate everything into these separate cups and realize when you're pouring into that cup, It's just that cup in that moment. And to try and tune everything else out, get to it when you need to get to it so that you can fully give yourself to whatever it is that you're focusing on at that time, whether it's at the hospital or with your mom or with the kids or whatever else it is you're doing. I think there will be so much peace of mind if you can just compartmentalize those moments. You got to applaud her and her... For sure.

1:01:30Craig Robinson:Yes. The responsibility that she's carrying for so many people that she knows and she doesn't know or she's beaten on a daily basis at her work. Have grace with yourself, too, I'd say, too. For sure. Because those days where you don't feel like you're killing it, probably the days that you're killing it the most. Yeah. But it's also okay not to kill it. Yeah. That's true. That's true. But having grace with yourself, I guess, is the biggest piece of... Yeah. And hopefully she can set healthy boundaries for herself as she goes to aspire for... What does that mean? What does that mean? People should be able to support her and her endeavors as well in the sense of like, I don't know how much her mom reaches out or feels like it's maybe a burden at times or maybe not.

1:02:24But if there's moments where she can have the space to go after the things that she wants to and she creates that room for herself, there's boundaries. A lot of people respect that and allow her to go pursue what she wants to and that it's okay. Even if somebody else gets the short end of the stick for a day or a week or a month. That's kind of what I... It's not a bad thing. Actually, I think I read that in your first book. And you said, say no, they will be okay. And we'll move on. That's exactly. Yeah. That's just what I wrote down. Learn to say no.

1:02:59Craig Robinson:Well, and you know, look, Vivian sounds like, and I say this a lot, she sounds like what I call a 120 percenter, you know, like everybody around this table. Like you don't think you're killing it when you were doing everything. It's like that extra percentage and you feel like, okay, now I'm putting it in. When, you know, life can be okay at 70 % and sometimes at 40 % and at 30%, you know. I'm learning right now. Yeah, you're starting to learn. And it's a sort of a conglomeration of what we've all said. It's like you can't do everything at 120%. And you can't and you don't have to. And you learn that over time.

1:03:53Craig Robinson:Like maybe you can't be there for your mom in the exact way that she wants you to be there for her. And it's okay, right? Because maybe if you're not giving 120 % to your mom and 40 % at times, somebody else will come in. Yeah. But if she's trying to fill all the cups herself, you know, there's no vacuum for need, right? If you're doing it all. Some people who aren't 20%, 120 percenters, they'll be a 20 percenter a lot. She may be surrounded by other siblings that are just putting in 20 % because Vivian's going to do it all. Because she's got the rest, yeah. You know? If you don't say you need help, nobody is going to help you, you know?

1:04:36so

1:04:38Craig Robinson:I'd say do less do less and learn to be okay with it that's no actually I was just sitting here every time you say 120 I'm like dang people probably don't even see the 20 no they don't that's all in here that's in your mind and heart and you're measuring yourself Yeah. And people are like, you know, like you say no and they're like, okay, fine, next. Yeah. You know? But I like the cups metaphor because people don't see all the cups you see. Right? You see all these cups and they're like, ooh, those three cups, you're handling things. They don't even know you got six others. They don't even know they got a table full of cups.

1:05:35That's a good point. Well, Vivian, I hope that was helpful. Absolutely.

1:05:39Craig Robinson:Yeah. But like you said, Stefan, props to you for holding it down. It's like there are a lot of people out in the world who are trying to do it all. And hopefully this gives you some guidance, takes a load off, and you don't feel guilty about looking out for yourself every now and then. Good advice. Okay. great advice well what's next for the Curry's not like there has to be because we just talked about that but I know what are you looking forward to like not even projects but just life we have our 15 year wedding anniversary this summer very happy about that yay congratulations but 17th year in the league see how many more years on the court and hopefully it's not over too soon, but it is at that stage where you start to think about, you know, appreciate it every year because, but then after that, who knows?

1:06:50We're very bad at predicting the future. At least I am. I said, next year's not gonna be that crazy. Right, right. Okay, I said that. All right, next year.

1:06:59Craig Robinson:Has it been like that for 15 years? And then you gotta hear about it from me. I'm the master at that. Yeah, I'm married to one of those. It's like... They just get so optimistic. Right. Oh, my God. I call it poor executive function. It's like, you know, it's going to take a lot of work to do that. And everything is so big. Every idea is so big. It's just exhausting.

1:07:31What's wrong with it, though?

1:07:32Craig Robinson:Well, it's been great having you guys spend some time with us. Thank you so much for dropping all the knowledge and being vulnerable and open. And Aisha, take care of yourself, your sanity. I will. It's just noise. Yes. All right. The truth is right before you. And I will fight somebody. That's it. That's it. Thank you. That's Stephan. And take your time. You don't have to leave soon. I got you. I got you. I hear you. No, this has been great. Thank you. We appreciate the time. Thank you for making us feel comfortable. Absolutely.

1:08:31Thank you.