IMO Presents: The Look Live with Wesley Morris

31:32So you have this on page 44 of your books. Oh my goodness. See, this is why I like this guy. There's a story that you tell about, I think it's 43 and 44. All right. 40 or 44. Anyway, the point, because there's some pictures in between. Oprah comes and interviews you. The both of you. Which sounds crazy, right? Oprah comes to your house and interviews you. That's what life was like. It's like she's coming to our house. This is before, I mean. Does she know who you are, Barack? She thinks you're important. Okay, all right, well, get ready. Like, wow. My motto then was, must have been a good speech, right?

32:16It's like he gave that speech, and all of a sudden, everybody knew who he was. And I was like, it's a good speech. You did a great job. Let's go home. We got to get back. We're in Boston. And then all the while, it just got more ridiculous. He was on the cover of Time. And I was like, what? Oprah's coming? This actually does sound surreal. Just imagine this person. How long had you guys been married at this point? Oh, we had been married seven, eight years. Math, okay. It's been a while. Do the math, y 'all. We had kids. The kids were little, so. Just to, like, watch this person who is just a regular shmegular guy who you know has something special.

32:57For sure, yes. To see everybody else figure out what made you marry him is a different story. Oh, wow. You guys are paying attention to this. So, yeah, Oprah comes over. So she comes over, has the interview. She's so grateful that y 'all took the time to do it. Sends you a gift. Oprah, this is Oprah. It wasn't a car, but it was close.

33:21Now, I don't want to step on any punchlines here, but I know what would have happened to that car. she sends you a suit like a camel suit she sends a box of then ralph loren's first edition clothing line it was like three suits seven sweat i mean it was an oprah size gift and this shows up at my door in this big locker trunk is a thank you and i'm sitting there like with all these clothes feeling like I've been Oprah'd. It's just like, wow, you get a car and you get a car. There's sweaters coming out and it's all this great stuff, every color. It's like, my God, this woman is rich.

34:09But because my husband, who is my husband, he's like, we can't keep that. It's like, what? He's like, I'm in office. We don't accept gifts. Imagine that.

34:34It's like they're all lovely. Pack them up and send them back. So I called Oprah. Yep, I called Oprah. And I was like, I can't keep all these things. And she was like, what? She's like, yeah, Barack's in office. You know, there's, I mean, you're really not supposed to accept gifts. She's like, but it's for me. And it's like, yeah, but, you know. So we sent that stuff back. I know. Listen. But there's a happy ending to it because he was a state senator. He stepped down as state senator, was running for U.S. senator. in between that time when he wasn't in office, Oprah sent the clothes back. What?

35:22Yes. She was watching. She was like, take them now, girl. Take them now.

35:37All right. Mish, Michelle. Hey. We have done so many fun looks together over the years. One of my personal favorites is when we started wearing your natural curls. And for me, I love it because I felt like it was the opening of the freedom of post-life Michelle. Yeah. Where you were in control and you got to do whatever you wanted with your hair. Tell me, you know, that's the vibe that she felt as well. I agree. I mean, I love my hair all the time because I had wonderful stylists like you helping me. So I never had to worry about it. But as you know, I always wanted to have the freedom to live my life without you.

36:23I didn't want to feel like I couldn't go out, I couldn't do anything unless Yanae was there making it happen. So when we started to go into the natural looks and wearing my natural curls and even working in Jerry with braids, the freedom that you're talking about. I know you love your braids. I love my braids. She loves her braids. I love the braids too. Well, because I'm also very active. Yes. I'm swimming all the time. I'm playing tennis and I can do it myself whether you're there or not. But the natural style that you structured, I loved it because it was fully me. It was free. It was also a representation to all textured girls out there that our hair comes in all different shapes, sizes, and colors.

37:13And this straight look and bouncy look is wonderful. It's fun. But the way our hair curls naturally is also beautiful and full and alive in ways that we got to celebrate. Absolutely. And the other thing is that with braids and natural hair, you are able to be in control, right? And I think that particularly when you started wearing your hair natural, it was the rite of passage that everyone else was just like, okay, Michelle's doing it. I can do it too. Right? Like everybody loved the flowy, bouncy. And I love that too. But I also love the versatility that our hair has. We have, our hair can be a chameleon and there's so much that we could do with it.

37:57And so you are able to embody that and show that to everyone to kind of give them be like, all right, girl, you could do this too, which is extremely important. You know that I'm very big on making sure that your hair isn't just looking beautiful, but that it stays healthy. And that goes back to the products that we use. So you know that I love your braids and I love that the braids give you the versatility that you want. And which is why we've played with you parts. We've played with wigs. We've done so many different things to master the look that you want for the time and place that you are and whatever you're doing.

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39:48Okay, so I just wanted to hear Oprah's side of the story. So I reached out to Oprah Winfrey. Of course you did. She got back to me. And what she Her version of the story You guys, perfect alignment Because it happened But what she wanted me to know Was that there was another story Okay She's talking about the Yes She has her legends ball Y 'all she invited me to the legends ball As what Oprah called a youngin Yes Because you were a youngin at the time. I was a youngin, but I was still like, you know, Coretta Scott King was there. Tina Turner, Coretta Scott King, Maya Angelou. I kept walking up to her.

40:37I said, Oprah, are you sure you meant to have me here? She was like, yeah, go sit down. You're supposed to be here. When Oprah goes sits down, you like... She's just like, stop asking me that. Go sit down. Don't cross that one. That's right. But she said that, you know, every year at her Legends events, she gives a gift to everybody who goes. The Legends get one. The youngins get one. And normally at the Legends events, she says, she gives out pajamas. Every year she was giving out pajamas. And this particular, your year. Well, it was her 50th birthday. So it was a big year for her. It's a big, it was the big one.

41:23Well, Gail is like, girl, don't be giving people pajamas. Enough with the pajamas. Weave enough. Don't do it. So Oprah's like, hmm, what can I give people? What would mean a lot that aren't pajamas that would really entertain everybody and not take Gail off? so she's like what about a little uh black and black diamond hoop earrings well there were two different types of earrings and the teardrop or the the the legends got these big diamond teardrops and then the youngins got these big diamond hoops with black and white diamonds on either side so we're at this luncheon where everybody gets the gift and they're opening up again you get a car You get diamonds.

42:15You get diamonds. And I open mine up, and I look at Oprah. And she's like, you can't keep that. I was like, I can't keep these. So everybody's like, ah, they're putting their diamonds on. Ah! You know, and all these, these are, like, great. I was like, you all don't have nice stuff? I would think, like, all of you all. Yeah, Tina Turner is just rolling in the aisles. Like, I'm the only one in that group that's broke, right? And they were so happy with these diamonds. And I was like, you know, I can't keep this. And she's like, really? I was like, I can't. I can't keep it because he was a U.S. senator then.

42:52Well, her version of this story, once again, y 'all are on the newlywed game. Your stories match up. But what she really wanted to emphasize in telling me this second story was that y 'all are good people. y 'all are wanted to stay on the right side of all the laws because i mean you know how it is i mean count the people who every day you hear about people taking gifts and the gifts are like gold bars this is a gift from the one of the most famous people on planet earth can't keep it and i think what she the she wanted me to run it by you but she also wanted me and the rest of us to know that from the beginning y 'all were ethical, conscientious, and you know she knew she'd chosen the right people to align her values with.

43:53Yeah. So. Well that starts at the top. And that's you know one of the reasons why I love, many reasons why I love and respect my husband. and that's who he is. He doesn't, you know, he's not extravagant, but he believes in the importance of symbolism. And when you are the commander-in-chief, there's a standard at which, you know, you have to set for the American people. And some of these things aren't even laws. They're just norms. They're just things that you do because you don't want the people to feel like wealthy people have a different level of access and, you know, access to power. So that means you've got to say no a lot.

44:37Our motto was, like, if it looks like fun, we can't do it.

44:48Oh, my God. Put that on every bumper sticker in this town. All right, but let's talk about some of the symbolism. Can we have, well, let's do the slide that was previously up, and then we'll just sort of go through them. So this is you wearing Jason Wu to the inaugural, to one of the inaugural balls. The first, the first one.

45:12Talk to me about this moment, the dress, what the experience was like, because this is you going through another portal, essentially. Yes, for sure. I mean, there were so many portals in this time in our lives. And it was all very surreal. The whole day was surreal. I mean, many of you all were there. It was 800 below. It was like the coldest weather possible. You wore two pairs of pantyhose. Two pairs of pantyhose. I should have had on boots. I didn't even realize. See, this is what I learned in the second inauguration. I was like, I'm putting on boots. And then it was like 70. But it was a long day that started with a prayer breakfast.

45:59So I'm, of course, up at 5 a.m., right? Because that's what women have to do. We have to get up to get hair and makeup done. And then the girls have to get ready. And mom, and you've got family and friends. So it's all a little spinny when that's going on. And so you go to the White House. You make that transition in the morning after the prayer breakfast. And then you get in the cars. You go to the Capitol. rule and that's when it gets otherworldly when you're in the beast in that moment and you're driving down and you see the you know the monument actual vehicle the beast the beast and you don't really see the breath of that day until we walk out of the capital in that moment where you see the president the family everybody walk out and that's when we saw what you would say history.

46:49It was like, oh my God, look at that. And when you grow up seeing the March on Washington, when you see the symbolism of what it means to be on the monument and you're on the other side of that, I mean, that's when you're like, whoa, this is something. And it should feel that way. You should feel the weight and the responsibility. I mean, the whole process is to ground the administration in the seriousness of the task you're about to take on and the responsibility. And that it is not about you. It is about all those people standing in the cold, you know, hoping for some kind of change. But it is cold.

47:38and then, you know, to do it with little kids. I mean, you remember how little the girls were? They were just so, you know, mothers with little kids. I'm just, don't fall. Are you paying attention? Are you warm enough? You know, so I'm looking at the Bible, but I'm looking at Sasha teetering on a stool, trying to look up. Are they paying attention? Is somebody picking their nose? Because these pictures are going to be historical. so you know I've got that going on in my mind while I'm trying to take this in and I think being a mother in these moments helped to ground me because I couldn't get too wrapped up in it because there's the mothering part are they okay what does this feel like for them do they feel seen in this moment I mean how are they emotionally I'm constantly weighing their emotional energy through all of this as well.

48:36That's why clothes have to be secondary. It had to be. You mean you can't think about what you're wearing? That was always my model. I had to set up enough of a process that allowed me to show up well, represent it, but then once the clothes were on, there was just too much going on. They had to fit, they had to move, they had to be warm. I had to know we did all of that beforehand so that once hair, makeup, as my team who is here knows, It's like once it's done, don't touch me, don't look at me, don't come near me. I barely look at myself when it's over because then the work happens. And that's the point.

49:16The point isn't the look. It's the look. It's us looking out for the country. It's us looking out for the nation. It's us looking out for all those people who are depending on us. So the look goes both ways. See, this is why you're doing my job now. I mean, because the title is infinite, right? It means like a thousand different things. Can we have the next slide? So this night, that gown was just the end of it. And I will say that the choice of Jason Wu, I've said this before, was intentional. The dress was beautiful. But we were beginning to realize that everything we did sent a message. sometimes people would read the wrong thing into a fist bump into uh you know uh into everything into everything into every single thing which is why it's just like look folks when i tell my story i'm not whining i don't feel put upon this is just what happened and i hope it doesn't offend someone for me to tell you what happened in my life because it is what happened to me and it is the truth as you said if we don't tell it there will be other people who will try to pretend like it didn't happen but it did and so there were a lot of things that we had to take into account I mean the fact that something you know anything was made of me wearing having my arms out was just a small indication of the kind of crazy attention that or standard of beauty or acceptability that was at play.

51:01So we knew that everything was going to send a message. So who I chose to design my gown was intentional. Jason was an extraordinary designer. This was not a DEI hire. It was an affirmative action. It was the prettiest dress. It was the best dress I put on. It made me feel ethereal. He just happened to be an immigrant kid, new to the business, who happened to be as talented, if not more, than some of the greats who always got those opportunities. Oscar de la Renta, he just got the opportunity. It was just a given. And see, that's how the world shouldn't work. You know, at some point, we, the greats, should step aside to let some of the young people get a chance.

51:53And so that was always my point. I mean, you're saying that in Washington, D.C. Well, but doing that, me wearing Jason Wu, where that could have been Oscar de la Renta, it would have just been another one of his accomplishments. For Jason Wu, it changed his life. And so that's what we were trying to do with the choices that we made was to change lives, to say something different about who belonged and who was good enough. And Jason Wu, that dress was the beginning of like, we're going to do this with everything we do, including everything I put on. We're going to rep American designers. We're going to rep everyone.

52:35But, you know, I didn't wear Chanel. I didn't wear beautiful clothes. but let's let's look at some of the beautiful clothes yeah but i i always repped american designers of all races of all all uh classes and these are well this just this is just shows the breadth of my style evolution can we talk about the sergio hudson um i mean all of these i believe i believe these appear together i believe in the i'm going to call this the breaking the internet portion of the book. Do you understand, so I get, sorry.

53:17I understand that one and that one in terms of like kapow, kapow, kapow. Like, blam. But I want to say I love this country because that one, the Sergio Hudson, the one you wore to Joe Biden's inauguration, that to me is just one of the most bewitching pieces of outfits I've ever seen anybody wear. There is so much happening here that I have never seen on anybody. Really? I mean, well, think about when this was happening. You're wearing a mask. Well, nobody saw anybody. That was also it. They were probably like, they're still alive! That's what I attribute some of that to was like oh my god mom and dad are still here but she would never warn you you would never warn anything like this i mean at least in terms of how we think about you in public right and just talk to me about how it felt to wear that and did you feel powerful in it because this is a power suit.

54:34It's a power suit. These are power clothes. Yeah. And so talk to me about what it felt to be in them. Well, you know, a beautiful anything, right, makes you feel everything, right? For that particular event, I mean, we all remember what just happened. January 6th happened. So to my mind, I was really in practical mode. We didn't know what was going to happen at this inauguration because the sitting president was trying to convince us that January 6th was just a peaceful protest. Right. So it wasn't clear whether anybody was going to be safe. Were you safe at the Capitol where it just happened?

55:17so to my mind where we usually travel with hair makeup for touch-ups staff assistance I said I don't want anybody with me inside this perimeter because if something pops off I don't want to put my team in jeopardy so I was like we're getting dressed I knew I wanted to wear pants because I was thinking if I have to run no I mean I'm seriously I was thinking I need to be comfortable. That's not a heel. The boot that I wore was a lower heel. I wanted to be able to move. I wanted to be ready. That's what it is though, right? Yeah. This is offensive and defensive. Yes. This is preemptive. And any power that comes just comes with the, yeah, we're here because this is important, and it's important for us to show up.

56:17I think that's what was going through my mind, this feeling of we're going to be okay, you know. Democracy can withstand a lot, and our presence has to represent that. I don't know that it was, now the coat is beautiful, the flow of the pant was lovely. Yes, all of that, but by then I was already, I wasn't wearing a lot of dresses then. I had my becoming book tour, so I was in pants more and more because I was just shifting away from that look into something else. And I was like, and I'm going to continue that look here. And Sergio Hudson is a fabulous designer, and he's known for his suits and his coats.

57:03Meredith pulled it out, and once again, I put it on. I felt good in it. I felt warm. and we had no idea that it was going to break the internet. I mean, there's some of these moments, the Versace dress, I put that on. I was like, yeah, this one, the gold boots. It's like, yeah, these are really, really cute. And I can, Barack is at the first test, right? So I walk out and he's like, wow. And I'm like, it's a good one, right? Yeah, yeah. But that, the inaugural outfit, there was really a lot of practicality for me that went into that dressing because of the circumstances. Can I read it a little more?

57:49Please. The belt. Oh, the belt. The belt is superhero, right? You think? I mean, I don't know. This is not about you. If I'm doing my job. Uh-huh, yeah. The belt, to me, says Marvel. It says... strength. It also says, I don't give a fuck.

58:17I don't know who you did it for, but it definitely felt like that was whatever it means to say for you for you. Yeah. I don't know. It's just such a... And that, once I left the White House, the responsibility of dressing for that job changed because I was not in that job anymore. I know a lot of young people say, did you feel like you have to give up part of yourself to, you know... Look, when you're a professional, you dress for the job. That's what I tell young people. It's like until you have control and power and leverage, then you better look at what your boss is wearing and act accordingly because you need a paycheck.

59:03So be smart about it. You dress for the job. And the job of first lady was a different kind of job. When I was done with that, I was doing different. I was my own boss. I wasn't representing the nation in that way. So yes, those, a lot of the, and the Versace dress was the last state dinner. So that was a kind of, I don't care dress. And I will tell you that one was like, because of the dresses that were available, that rose gold, I put that on. I was like, this is sexy. It's the last one. This is like, bye. Bye.

59:48Hi, I'm Carl Ray, and I'm Michelle Obama's longtime makeup artist. I've been on many of these sets, but I'm so excited to be in front of the camera. My first client was my mom. I would always watch her apply her makeup. When I was around 14 years old, I asked her if I could do it for her because I thought I could do a better job. She obliged, and soon after, she started asking me to do her makeup. a lot. I never knew makeup was a career until I was an adult. Now my work has introduced me to so many interesting experiences. I've worked in film, TV, print, fashion, and beauty all around the world.

1:00:26I've also had the pleasure to work with many celebrities and dignitaries along the way, and I'd love to work with you. So the next time you're booking on Airbnb, click on the services tab, you'll find professionals like me and my team. We can help make your next special occasion even more memorable. Weddings, galas, birthdays, headshots, or anytime you just want to feel and look your very best. You can find me at airbnb.com slash services. This episode of IMO is brought to you by Progressive Insurance, who help people move forward and live fully. Owning a home can be one of the most powerful ways to build financial security.

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1:04:52One photo we don't have with respect to that Versace dress, it is in this book. and I know look at you with your tabbed book I put a tab on the Versace raised a very thorough young man there is a photo of can we talk about this one the back there's no page number what page it's in the section Robin is that you it's in the section of there's a whole section on inaugural gowns uh it's just before page 210 um what is it you're looking at the draping there no what are you looking at what do you see there's a photo of you i never watched you from behind i've never done it and it's it's not for the reasons you think?

1:05:50I'm just, it just never, it's not, that's not what we're doing here. It looks good. It's a well-bitted dress. It looks great, but I'm saying. What are you saying?

1:06:05Jeff Koons, Brancusi. This to me is like, you can see your reflection in this dress. Yes. And the one place where it's not draping is back there. And this this is you just said. Yes. This is I D G A F. This is kiss my ass. Oh. This is the world is looking and can see themselves in this part of the dress. It's like you can see the reflection. You can't do it in the front. Right. In the front. Well, now you're reading a lot. You put the ball on the team, Mrs. Obama. I'm going to take a swing. Look, all of my choices ultimately are what is beautiful and what looks beautiful on. And I think as women, in the end, that's the whole point of it.

1:07:08One of my philosophies is that if I don't feel good in it, If I don't feel beautiful, I don't buy it. I don't pick it. I don't wear things because they're in. I don't even know whether I'm going to like a dress. I don't pick a dress from the rack because we all know something that looks good on the rack. You put it on and it's like, ooh, not for me. And that's one of the messages. It's like, if you feel good with your arms out, wear your arms out. You know, if you feel good in nylons, then put them on. That was my philosophy. Does anybody feel good in nylon? Some people do. I don't know. I did not like them.

1:07:48But you also look happy in a lot of those photos. I'm always happy. I had a really great job and a great time doing it. And we got a lot done. I mean, there was so much joy in everything we did. And this is one of the things that I wanted to show in the book was the life of that White House. Just the vibrancy, the activity. So, you know, we could have done just a series of photos of standing in pretty dresses. But when you open this book, you see kids, you see puppies, you see all the movement because we were an active White House. And we were a joyful White House. One of the chapters is called First Lady as a Verb.

1:08:40Yeah. I mean, everything for me was about, it was about moving the ball. I mean, literally, physically moving the ball. An initiative, as my team will know in the East Wing, it was like, what are we going to do? We're not going to announce something. I didn't want to be a symbolic First Lady that was a slogan First Lady. It's like, hmm, you know, just say whatever. I wanted to have tangible goals and outcomes that I could see because I came from that world of running a nonprofit. I ran programs. I started things. I like to build things and see them go. Those are great verbs. I mean, for real. So, yes, I was always a person that was thinking about moving things forward, going ahead.

1:09:35And that helped us get through. You know, if you're focused on the work, you know, just getting things done every day, then it makes all the hardships, all the thorns and arrows and all the haters and all the negative things, they just blow right off of you because you have an agenda in front of you. And if you focus on that agenda, which is what I would tell my team, that's what we're going to focus on. And clothes were like that, too. We're gonna figure out a process that we make this simple so that we're not while I have to wear a lot of clothes I'm not gonna spend every day. I cannot spend every day Thinking about what I'm gonna wear.

1:10:13I have to have this done quickly. We fit one day a month We fit we had the calendar. We knew what we were doing Meredith my stylist brought clothes in we fit them we tried them on done so that the work could get done. And as I said, I was concerned about, can I hug somebody in it? Will it get dirty? I mean, I was the kind of first lady that there was no telling what I would do. You know, I mean, I'd walk out the house and I'm doing push-ups, you know, and then people start, I mean, in the time that I was, I think I caught a football pass from an NFL player. I played soccer with David Beckham. I did push-ups with Desmond Tutu.

1:10:58I have broken a Guinness World's Record for jumping jacks. I mean, and this would all happen on a day, you know. It could. It could be, you know, you're giving a speech on health here. You're meeting with the first lady of blah, blah, blah. And now you're digging up dirt in the backyard with kids. So my clothes had to be ready for that. Because the thing about clothes that I find is that they can welcome people in or they can keep people away. And if you're so put together and so precious and things are so crisp and the pin is so big, you know, it can just tell people, don't touch me. You know, if you're not dressed to bring people in.

1:11:49That's a great point about the purchase. You know, your clothes can make people push away. So I always wanted to be able to, if a rope line was happening, if somebody was going to be in tears and need a hug, we're not wearing white. We're going to wear print if I have stuff to do because I'm not going to push somebody away when they need something from me. And I'm not going to let the clothes get in the way of that. And I had a team of people who understood that. So, you know, there had to be a lot of thought. and that stuff had to be done well in advance. Well, I want to talk about the team for a second because these people seem fantastic.

1:12:31They are. They've been around the entire time.

1:12:42And I don't know. I mean, Yanae and Jerry and Meredith, of course, Carl. Yeah. I want to take a second to talk about Carl. Yeah. Because there's a part, I mean, you know, everybody, one of the beautiful things about this book is that everybody who is on the team has a little section of the book where they talk about how they got started, what it's been like to work with you, what the artistry that they practice, because, I mean, it's work, but it also is, and it's a talent, but it also is art. And for Carl's entry in this book, I'm going to read it. I'm going to read part of it because I think it's beautiful.

1:13:34And I think that it is such a... It stands in for the whole of how many, many people think about you in a way that feels different from the way we've thought about people who've had this job before. And I also think that it is a testament to, I just can't imagine many other women allowing what Carl wrote to appear in print at all. Because it's just, well, it's intimate. And it's about you. So hold on, let me just read a little part. This is Carl Ray writing about what it is like to do Michelle Obama's makeup.

1:14:25Carl, are you listening?

1:14:31Carl's here? Carl is here. Carl's always here. Look at me. Don't I look like Carl's here? All right, so I'm going to start. Oh, fuck. Can you read it? You can't read. You can't see, can you? I'm sitting here going, wow, he's got great eyesight. That's good enough to get me through this. I think I can do it. Okay, hold it up real close. Or far away. I think I can do it. Depending on whatever she's doing later that day, I might add to that and then use some concealer. This is about the foundation. This is a parenthetical. She inherited amazing skin from her mother and has passed it on to her girls.

1:15:14I set her face with powder, which allows everything else to apply smoothly and often I do a little, quote, baking, unquote, by applying extra powder beneath her eyes, down her nose, and on her chin and forehead. We then finish with a setting spray. Her skin has red undertones, so I use warm bronze and gold tones to highlight and brighten her cheekbones and other high points of her face, and cooler brown tones for contouring and sculpting her jaw, nose, cheeks, and forehead, blending along the way to enhance the structure of her face. If she's wearing an off-the-shoulder look, I apply shimmer or glow to her shoulders and décolletage.

1:16:00Depending on what she's wearing, I sometimes even apply it down her arms and legs. Then I work on her eyes, my favorite part. I fill in the lids, often with gold, bronze, or soft peach, and then do a brown contour on each eye crease. I generally use a black pencil on her top lash line, sometimes followed with a liquid eyeliner for a, quote, kitten eye. We've gone full-blown cat on special occasions. I then use a black or brown coal eyeliner on her waterline. Now, I don't know what a waterline is. Is it just a thing? Okay. Thank you, Carl. I learned something new. I then use a black or brown coal eyeliner on her waterline and fill in her eyebrows with a brow pencil and powder.

1:16:46Lips and lashes are generally last. For her mouth, I use a lip pencil, lipstick, and finish with a gloss. 75 % of the time, I opt for a nude lip, which I do in a variety of tones, including peach, brown, caramel, and pink. Nothing too distracting, always enhancing. I always want the focus to be on her message. I'm going to skip way ahead. Michelle remains my primary client. I've worked with her for 16 years, and I believe she's more beautiful now than ever before. I'm not done. She loves the fact that I'm fast. This is fast. How long does this take? He can do that in 15 minutes. Damn. I mean, how long did it take the Sistine Chapel to happen?

1:17:36I mean, Michelle Remy is my primary client. I've worked with her for 16 years, and I believe she's more beautiful now than she ever was before. She loves the fact that I'm fast. Sometimes she doesn't even look in the mirror when I'm done. That's his exclamation point. Look at yourself, I'll say. You're beautiful. President Obama on multiple occasions has said, Carl, I want to thank you for making Michelle look and feel beautiful. And he always responds, my pleasure. He does. That's beautiful. I'm so glad you read that.

1:18:15I find that so moving because it is Like the care. I didn't want to go into this really. Because it kind of doesn't need, it's so obvious it doesn't need to be said. But this is a black woman. This is a black woman who was in the White House. A place, I mean, I don't care what they say, she was never supposed to be. the idea that you were being beautified in a place that you know it's many points in history were responsible for making sure you couldn't even write the words white house by a white man who loved you it's just that is america to me that is yes it is yes it is and i don't know this book is deep because nobody talks about this stuff right i mean you can get you can go to youtube and see all kinds of beauty tutorials and all that stuff but this isn't a tutorial this is it's kind of like fashion criticism it is an artist talking about his craft it is hearing about what it is like to practice that craft on an on an excellent person i'm going to say according to him but i know you know um what is what is it how does it feel to have gone through that experience where what is happening is on the one hand how you're supposed to look but beneath that really is about how you're feeling.

1:20:20Even a question? Is that a question? You know, it's complicated because I, you know, as I said before, I think that life is such, during those times, even now, can be such a whirlwind. that there I think this is the moment where I took the time to actually reflect on it so what came up for you while you were reflecting on it I mean we have the book but what was it like to write it well it was beautiful it was a book that I always knew I wanted to write the question was always the timing of it because I think quite frankly I probably had a little PTSD I probably still do about how I what I put out into the world because I know that there will always be some kind of commentary some reaction you do it you also want a reaction I mean I wrote this book to create a conversation among us as people as women as women of color um you know so I knew I wanted to do this it was just now felt like the time.

1:21:33I also knew that I wanted to use this as kind of a love letter to the team of people that you just wrote about, Meredith and Carl and Yanae and Jerry. And let me just say, that team is the team that's been with me the longest, but there are so many others. All the seamstress, all the designers, Johnny Wright, who was my hairdresser during the eight years in the White House. I think Dawn is here who has done my nails all this time. I mean, my trainers and, you know, it's just, you know, this whole process of showing up for the world, it, there's no way I could do it without this team. And I think about how much they sacrifice because we live in an age where it's like the odd part of the first lady position is that I guess I'm famous, but I'm not a celebrity.

1:22:34What's the difference to you? Well, celebrity is a celebrity stylist. You're styling for beauty. You're styling to be seen. I'm styling to work. And I'm not saying that, you know, there, you know, there, no, I never walked on a red carpet other than a state dinner red carpet. I am the first. I have a job to do. And so my team has to understand that mission. And when you work in the beauty industry and you're used to a stylist who wants credit or wants to be seen, it's like we're not even talking about this. We did all of this and we're not talking about it because we're also thinking about the times that we're in.

1:23:19How are we going to talk about fashion when there's a recession? How are we going to talk about, you know, a pair of shoes when, you know, we need immigration reform? I mean, there was also thinking about what is appropriate to say at what time. And I always felt like fashion was the underlying story. So that meant that they had to kind of cut their shine. You know, there was no posting. There was no behind-the-scenes gossip or talk. And to have people who were so young, let me just remind you, Yanae was 18, 19 years old. When she started, you'll hear her story and Jerry the same way. These were kids.

1:24:01Meredith was 28 years old. We had a very young White House, a lot of really smart young kids who came in understanding the assignment, that none of this was about them, me. We weren't there to support the commander-in-chief. We were there to represent the country. everybody took their job seriously they didn't make money there was no glamour to it in an industry of glamour you know this was about message and service and the fact that they were willing to make that sacrifice right alongside of us riding in you know bad sweaty vans taking helicopter rides that were precarious, being on boats, being in holds in Africa with no air conditioning and no lights and through thunderstorms.

1:24:54I mean, this was not a glamorous job, but they did it and did it well. So I want their stories to be told because this is what this work is. We as women, we don't get to just show up any kind of way. we don't have the luxury yet to just wake up and throw on a tie and call it a day there's a lot of

1:25:24and I think this book is you know this book is kind of speaking for all of us for all that work that we do that sometimes goes unacknowledged I mean I even saw it when we did foreign trips you know the west wing didn't necessarily plan a trip for a woman you know they wouldn't think about the cobblestones or the rain or the grass or the terrain but yet here i am following my husband around in a pair of heels or you know because what a man has to do is if it's casual you take the jacket off if it's formal you put the jacket on you take the tie off you put the tie on. It's like we don't get to do that.

1:26:07But I'm with him every step of the way. I'm doing it's like the Ginger Rogers thing. I'm doing the same thing, giving speeches, but I'm doing it with heels and walking backwards. And it's not just me. You know, it was our Secretary of State. It was all of our senior advisors. It was Nancy Pelosi. When I would think about these women who are along on these CODELs, and they're trying to keep it together and keep their hair in place, and the men are just in their stupid suits just not thinking not asking a question not realizing all the machinations that have to go on for us to stand up and show up um and we feel like we have to do this stuff quietly like it just happens it isn't magic it's a lot of freaking work and it takes care.

1:26:58I think that's also the four pounds, right? Like, the work, I mean, they worked, y 'all worked, so we work, right? Like, to lift this, to carry it. I got to take two of these back. Okay. I put them tellingly in my garment bag. I can't even know. Did anybody, you're talking about these, you know, the difference for women in this experience in terms of like what you all had to just what it's like to put on clothes period um did anybody talk to you just about how to not look or how to look during those years did you get advice from anybody no okay no there isn't you know there isn't a handbook for it.

1:27:50You know, that was one of the excellent things that Meredith was able to do. And most of this was, it was very important on foreign travel because, you know, even the state dinner at Buckingham Palace, to wear gloves, to not wear gloves. That is the question. You wore the gloves. I wore the gloves, but there were so many meetings about those gloves and were they appropriate and who wore them did the queen wear them and what did other first ladies do and the state department they weren't that helpful they didn't have the strong opinion about it and let me tell you if I showed up as the first black first lady and didn't have something appropriate remember when I touched the queen after she touched me it's like she touched me first y 'all she did she did and I felt like it was rude not to touch her back.

1:28:49Or you wear a cardigan. I mean, you know, we're out in the country, in the world, representing the country. That takes work. Visit with the Pope. The amount of requirements to visit the Pope, a mantilla, you've got to have your arms covered. you've got to cover your knees that's if you're you know you can be in the Sistine Chapel in shorts and a t-shirt but if you're going upstairs to see the Pope there there is a way to dress and some of that comes from the State Department but some of that work was Meredith researching what other first ladies wore and calling designers people on the ground who knew and because she did that work.

1:29:38I didn't have to. I could be there and do the work and know that what I had on was appropriate. Those are things that male leaders do not have to think about. If you were visiting an Arab country, the amount of rules and who you can touch and who you can't and what you can't do as a woman, all of that matters very much. So that becomes a real, that's a real diplomacy issue, that if you get it wrong, maybe you wear the wrong color, or you've, you know, a color in a certain country could mean something. So you're constantly sending messages with everything you do and for me there's absolutely no way that I could get to a foreign country because I was also working there giving speeches meeting with young girls doing work there and then I had my kids as well and they had to be dressed appropriately you had to wear something to get off the plane then you had to get in the car and then you had to wear something to the just the amount of packing that would take for a foreign trip.

1:30:50That was all Meredith. There was one person doing that for me, my girls, my mom, if she traveled. Managing outfits, steaming, getting things ready for event after event after event. That's a lot of work, y 'all. Yeah.

1:31:15We've my sister and her friends had some questions okay we have time for one um it's a question i share which is basically um do you get advice from your daughters about what to wear and what not to wear no let me not not laugh at that no no no the girls they yes i i get the you look good mom or that works. I know if they, look, they go in my closet a lot. That's a sign of approval. Oh, for sure. But they, you know, as they get older, they're starting to respect what I have. I mean, I remember I was going to give Sasha an Aliyah dress that I had. And for those of you, Aliyah is a really, she's like, well, why would I want that?

1:32:03I was like, ooh, you just don't know. You just don't know. But now they're starting to know. It's just been fun watching them come into their own style they're very different girls they have their unique style I find that I'm now at a point where I'll see something cool that they have a jacket or a shoe and I'm like where'd you get that no we're doing more of that they're like where'd you get that but it that's very different you know teenage children that Brandy Melville period oh I'm sorry but that's that short those short dresses and they went through they were just like every young teenager they wanted the stuff off of the web they wanted to go to the mall they wanted you know they they didn't they thought designer clothes were for old people uh and so they're just now as they're coming into their own professions they're just now starting to appreciate the quality of clothes and to understand dressing for you know being out in the world so we're we're we're starting to develop a more shared fashion story together and it's like a new thing for you to talk about no no with girls you're always look sasha was beating her face from the time she was 11 years old because this is the thing about this new generation social media introduces them to a lot of stuff early on.

1:33:34I didn't wear makeup until Oprah came over. I mean, literally, you know, you take one picture that appears in the press with no makeup on and you're like, I need a makeup artist because I don't wear makeup all the time. But when you are filmed and seen, it does make a difference. You do not show up on TV without makeup. You just, Barack will get touched up. He's learning that too. so I didn't grow up wearing makeup but the girls you guys who have young girls they all know how to do their makeup because of social media they all go on these websites and they know how to powder and contour in ways that are amazing to me so Sasha was doing that for the longest and Barack was like she's just wearing too much makeup and I was like it's a phase you know this is what he had to understand girls we play we play in these spaces and I was like let them play you know they will get to the point where they will decide as women on their own what they can afford to do what they have time to do I was like they get to the point it's like Sasha the minute she gets in college when she doesn't have any time no makeup and lo and behold she chose sleep over the extra time to put that so it's just slowly it's like oh yeah that hour routine you You can do that when you finish your homework and you're just at home.

1:34:58You can learn from Carl how to do it in 15 minutes. That's true. She's gotten faster. But that's the beauty of having young girls around, just watching them. And I give credit to this new generation, the younger generation. A lot of this openness, the sharing comes from that. They want authenticity. They want to hear your truth. They don't want things to be powdered over or smoothed over. And they're honest. I think my decision to wear braids more and more comes from a whole generation of young black girls who are embracing their natural hair, who are no longer using relaxers, who are saying, take me as I am, who are embracing their beauty.

1:35:49And as I said, I wanted to be a part of supporting them in that journey. And I know that me being Michelle Obama, the former first lady, wearing braids in the White House mattered. And that was a deliberate decision that I made to support young girls that are trying to break old patterns and norms that don't serve them as young girls. And I credit that generation, and I want them to continue to be themselves and show up in ways that make sense for them not following some limited stereotype of what beauty is. And I say that not just to girls of color, but to all women. You know, that's what we need to break out of, is this one narrow standard of what is acceptable and beautiful.

1:36:38I hope that what I've shown is that beauty comes in all shapes, sizes, and colors. There isn't one way to wear your hair. There isn't one way to look professional. There isn't one way of showing up as an American. And I think it's incumbent upon all of us as women not to look for us to look like each other. You know, we should embrace the power of how different we are. Our hair texture, our sizes and shapes, it's all beautiful. And it's all important. And it all matters. But we have to fight for it. Because if we let somebody else set those standards for us, we will be trapped in this narrow definition.

1:37:20This is how we got in this mess in the first place. This is how we got in this mess in this place in the first place. So, yes. So, I hope that this empowers us as women, as people, to embrace all of who we are, whatever that looks like. Michelle Obama, everybody! Thank you, Wesley! You all, thank you, D.C. Thank you for buying the book. Wonderful crowd. You all take care. Good night.

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