Stop Chasing The Shiny Things with Jamie Lee Curtis

24:46I'm going to, I'm going to not tell you the story of how I became an actor, which was boring and literally was an accident. And you've told the story. Right. I've been, you know, I became an actor because somebody I knew randomly said they were looking for Nancy Drew. At Universal and I was home at Christmas and I was like, okay, I was lucky. So a lot of it has to do with luck, Michelle Obama. I had no clue. I didn't have a clue. I just followed the next thing. I didn't, but I have a very strong work ethic.

25:18Craig Robinson:Yeah. And I'm curious enough to ask questions. I want to know things I don't know I can say I don't know. And how do you do that? I have no training and yet. Did you ever have any training? No. So what were you learning as you went about your acting ability? What light bulbs were clicking for you as you went along? Or were you just fully like— It's just what comes up. It's like, read this and go do that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm an emotional person and I would like to say I'm an empathetic person. If there's anything in me, it's that I have an understanding that life is hard for people. And a deep level of empathy, which why I tear up in it is that it's so absent these days because our leadership isn't showing it, you know?

26:28I know. So it's really nice to see it in action because it's out there.

26:36Craig Robinson:It's out there. It's out there everywhere. Yeah. And there are people, there are beautiful people. There are just, I mean, I had a colonoscopy recently. Please tell us more, Jamie. Heidi right now is like, what? I swear to God, this is what just happened in the back room with Heidi Schaefer. She literally just went like this. Well, we at the table have all had colonoscopies. I had a colonoscopy recently. And the Twilight thing is pretty good, so. Just so you know.

27:11first of all, I write notes to my doctor that I somehow can twist around and write them in eyebrow pen, you know, eyeliner pencil on my butt. You don't. I do. And I write arrows pointing, and I say this side up. I write, thank you, doctor. I won't name him. Thank you, Dr. M for going to medical school. You get that all on your butt. But then I also bring a$100 bill and I say, listen, if the anesthesiologist wants to dial the propofol up slowly and the hundy's gone when I wake up, I'm fine with it. Because, yeah, sorry. But that's not why I brought up my colonoscopy.

27:57Craig Robinson:Once again, we digress. But for those of us who have had it, It's like, that's hilarious. I do draw diagrams and arrows. Never thought of that. Remind them. Never thought of that. And I still go to Walter Reed, to the military doctors. I think that might be a good one for my next colonoscopy. I'll send you a picture. I took a picture the last time. Please do that. I'm not going to show it to anybody. The reason I brought my colonoscopy was that the nurse who greeted me at 6 a.m. to put her in the IV and to, you know, get me prepped before the team comes in. I'm talking to her and she's young, beautiful, Hispanic, young girl.

28:45And I said, you know, as we do, you have kids? She said, yeah, I have three. And I said, you have three kids? I said, where are they right now? She said, they're at my sister's. I said, she said, I dropped them there before I come to work. It was 6 a.m. Yeah. She's waking up three little kids. Every day? She said five days a week. Yeah. She says, I said, what time did you get them up? She said 4.15. Every day at 4.15, she wakes up her three kids. And she's put their school clothes in the backpack, in each of their backpacks. and she takes them to her sister's in their pajamas. And then they go back to sleep at her sister's, and then her sister takes them to school.

29:32Every day, five days a week. You see, I didn't have that. I don't work that hard, and I don't have that life. That wasn't my life with my children. But I'm aware that that's really the life going on around me.

29:49Craig Robinson:That's right. I was just at Children's Hospital Los Angeles. You want to spend a day and understand how hard people work. Everyone should. Go to a children's hospital, volunteer to children's hospital and see how dedicated those teams are to those. So for me, not to belabor the point, I think it's just simply I'm aware that life is hard. My favorite quote is from The Princess Bride. Life is pain, Highness, and anyone who says differently is selling something. And it's really. It's really... Well, and it's something to be mindful of. You don't get something for nothing in this world. And anybody tells you, I don't care if he's the president or not, you don't get something for nothing.

30:33Craig Robinson:You know, there's a cost to life. Of course. You know, there's a cost to making sure everybody has health insurance. And there's a cost to all of us to make sure that that nurse could possibly have some more reasonable, affordable childcare while she's serving other people. there's a cost to all of us to have a clean environment. You don't get to do it without paying taxes or shorting your taxes. That's the fundamental idea of being human. Oh, well. Of any religion. Oh, well. Any religion. Mm-hmm. That is the cornerstone of it. Yes, it is. Help each other. Yes, it is. Love thy neighbor. Yes, it is.

31:12Welcome someone. Be open. Put your hand out. Reach back. Help somebody up. Pull them up. It's the nature of, for me, and that's not, I mean, my parents were, you know, good people, but it wasn't, it's just the experience of being alive this long. And I mean, I don't have any other way of doing it. I am a worker amongst workers. That's not just a recovery phrase. That's been my vibe for a long time. I would have required our crew here wear name tags so that when I walk in the room, you know my name. I don't know yours. There's an imbalance. Oh, that's a good idea. No, but that's an imbalance. And right away, it puts me.

32:00Yeah. I mean, I'm the one sitting here at the table with y 'all. But, like, I don't know your name. Like, that feels imbalanced to me. And on work that I do as the leader of a show, that's a requirement. So, I mean, I have a lot of opinions. I'm just opinionated.

32:19Craig Robinson:Well, it's a good thing you're on IMO because it's all about opinions. I can.

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36:33so jamie what craig you recently so so you're you're i get into that very late night dj voice at what point in your career did you start sort of aiming for stuff that you were like you you're talking about I'm doing things now that are for me. Accident. Same way I'm an actor. Accident. I'm telling you now, I was sent everything, everywhere, all at once. It was the weirdest thing I'd ever read. I didn't understand a word of it. I still don't. I need to watch it two more I didn't understand a word of it. And my agent sent it to me. I had made the Halloween movies in Charleston, Wilmington, and Savannah.

37:30Okay. So all of those movies were made away from my family. I have two children. I have a dog who loves me more than any human on the earth. and I have a husband and family and friends. And all I do is leave town to work. Okay. And I was sent a script. And it, first thing, it was shot in Los Angeles. So it was shot in Simi Valley, Los Angeles, which is not, it's outside the TMZ. Yeah. So it's far enough away that they could get away with making it. But it was still Los Angeles. I was still going to sleep in my bed. Two, it was starring Michelle Yeoh. who's getting her star today, even though I know this is months later.

38:15She is actually right now getting a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, Michelle Yeoh. And three, they gave me enough money to pay cash flow. And I said, yes. Those were the three reasons. I didn't understand it. You weren't angling. I wasn't. I didn't know nothing. I just said, okay. But I knew her. You understood. Because I have met Deirdre's. Deirdre. I know her. This is someone who's unloved, untouched. I understand the power of your job, that when someone has a job like that, all of the slights of humanity that has come your way as an unattractive, unlovable human being, all of the slights that come with those two descriptions.

39:10and my job is to say, fuck you. No, you're going to have to do all that again. Oh, no. Oh, no. This is my payback. And so that was her life. And the key to Deirdre Bobirdre was, if you see the movie again, she has beautifully manicured hands because I realized that was the only time she ever was touched. My point is, that was made in 38 days in Simi Valley in January of 2020. We wrapped the movie the day COVID started. So whatever Monday, March 16th was the last day of the shoot, 2020. And the movie didn't come out for two years. The movie came out in March of 2022. and then it won nine Oscars or seven Oscars in March of 2023.

40:07Now, if you think for one second - That you had a plan. Driving to Sini Valley at five o 'clock in the morning to go to an empty office building that used to be the countrywide savings and loan campus, sexy, and not have trailers because we used offices in the building as our dressing rooms. And you're making a movie about the multiverse. And you think, oh, yeah, that's this is my chance. This is the one, man. This is gonna. This is. Whoa.

40:48Craig Robinson:So what goes through your mind when that when this when that happened is in, you know, and you're like, what? I remember exactly where I was sitting. I remember what I was wearing. when Heidi and Rick, the assistant, called and said, I have Rick and Heidi for you. And I was like, oh, okay. Hello. And he'd go, hi. I was like, hi, what's up? He said, hey, listen, we wanted to talk to you. We had a conversation today with A24, a releasing company. I was like, yeah. They said, I said, about what? They said, about the campaign. I was like, the campaign for what? And they said, well, you know, we want to make sure that they're including you in the campaign.

41:34I was like, I can't say what I said. Yeah, I can. Right? Yes, you can. CBS isn't going to fire me. Well, isn't that what they do? That's what they do. Yeah, apparently. But not here. Not here. You know, I said, fuck you to both of them. I was like, stop it. Stop it right now. There is no campaign. They said, well, we just want to make sure that, you know, they're going to do a big push for the movie. I was like, okay, whatever. Look it. Just back off. Anyway, that became insane. And it's really a thing.

42:09Craig Robinson:Yeah. And it's really mind-swimming. And I did everything I could the whole time to go, la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la. This isn't me. Like, just not, I didn't want to read anything. I didn't want to have people whisper things in my ear. I hated it. And I, the last, I never in my life, you have to remember, I, the last thing in my life I ever thought would ever happen would be that I would be nominated for an Academy Award. That just was never in the cards. That was never anywhere in the work I did. It was just, that was what other people had happened to them, not me. and I am telling you that morning, that morning, and this, I got COVID at the Golden Globe.

43:00Thank you, Colin Farrell. And he knows, and we've worked it out. Anyway, he gave me COVID at the Golden Globe. So I had been homesick with COVID and it was the day of the nominations. And I'm telling you, I'd had like a lot of people texting like, you're so excited. I was like, shut up go away stop and then i woke up that morning and i went downstairs now my husband of a long time yes makes really funny movies and one of the movies he made was a movie called for your consideration which is a parody of the season of shiny things yes it's the whole idea yeah of this weird little movie somebody whispering in somebody's ear that they're going to get an Oscar nomination.

43:49And then what happens? Catherine O 'Hara, that great, weird, she can do that with her face. Sweet girl. We just lost her what? A week ago, two weeks ago. Anyway, I know this is later, but that wasn't tape or anything. She had this weird ability to make her face look like that. And so, but you know, and what happens to people, the mind game that goes on. That's what the movie is about. My husband made that movie. So that morning of the Oscar nominations, you know, my husband said, what are you doing? I said, well, I'm going to get up and watch the thing. He said, why? I said, you know why, honey?

44:28A, I have to exorcise you in your movie. Like, I can't, this is my life. That was a movie. I said, I'm not a character in a movie. I'm a person. I said, I'm aware that there's enough chatter that there is a chance that that would happen. I don't think it's going to happen, but I'm telling you, that's a possibility that it could happen. And here's the story. This will delight you. I've been an actress for a long time. the only person I know who won an Oscar is Deborah Oppenheimer. And on the morning of the Oscar nominations, I was like, I get up really early. So I was up at four and then, you know, I made coffee or whatever.

45:15And then at like five, the thing starts at 5.30. So like at 5.10, I looked at my phone and there was a text from Deb. And it said, I'm sitting outside your house. I have my computer with me. If you don't want me to be there with you, I'm fine where I am. But I'm here. But I'm sitting outside your house. And I opened my gate. And there she was. And she was sitting in her car with a pillow and her computer. And she came in and sat with me. And when my name came up on that screen, I didn't know she was doing this. My friend Deborah Oppenheimer was taking pictures secretly. She kind of held her phone because I could not believe it.

46:12And the real moment of disbelief was when they called my name and then they called Stephanie Shue. because, you know, she was my, she wasn't my daughter in the movie, but she was the other actress in the movie. And it would have felt wrong to me. Right, right. Because she has a fantastic, she's fantastic in the movie. Anyway, that was the moment of real exuberation. But I have it all on film. Oh my gosh. And that's the last thing I ever thought would happen in my life was that moment. The rest of it was not like, like the rest of it, the night of it, I went with my husband. We sat, I, the way, literally this happened.

47:01We were sitting in the front row at the fricking Oscars. Yeah. And there was Michelle and Key and Steph. And then the Daniels were over there and I kneeled down. We were in the front row. I saw, left side. And I kneeled down in front of Michelle Yeoh and I looked at her and I said, Michelle, where are we right now? She said, what do you mean? I said, Michelle, where are we right now? She said, at the Oscars. I said, uh-huh. And why are we at the Oscars? She said, because we made a movie that people liked. I said, uh-huh. And where are we sitting? and she said in the front row I said okay great just checking to make sure I'm awake like aware and then I went down the line sat kneeled in front of key key same thing Steph same thing be aware so when I say there we were in the front row it was literal you had already won it was like Michelle yeah he Steph all of us were like wow how did we get here how did we get here yeah And then, of course, the miracle of all miracles is that we won.

48:14Craig Robinson:You are so the anti-superstar. I mean. I just don't understand it. Yeah. And I think it's beautiful. I think that's why people love you. That's why I am in love with you. Now you're flirting, Michelle. You were one of one. I'm a flirt. I can do it too. I can do it too. but you've changed the notion of what it means to age in the public eye. And I'd love for you to talk about that. Sure. Because I'm hoping that we are ushering in all of us because I'm 62, you are 67. Yeah. We are in our 60s, which I think is the best time of life. Without question. and I want to talk about that journey for yourself, how you feel.

49:05Craig Robinson:It's like, you know, you're not, you know, you believe in aging. You know, you believe in the beauty of it. Like shit happens, aging happens. I mean, it's coming for all of us, by the way. But that's not what Hollywood is all about. Ah, you know, here's the problem. It's not just Hollywood. It's also technology. It's also social media. It's also filtering. It's also, it's what we used to call airbrushing is now just filtering. it's all fakery. It's just the fakery. It's the cosmeceutical industrial complex, which is as insidious in many ways as the military industrial complex. It's about money.

49:46So it's just about freaking money, right? And it's the idea that you're going to tell someone that this is going to change you and make you better. And therefore, better means you'll be more loved, you'll be more successful. So it's this cycle of bullshit, but it preys on our base insecurities. You know, and for many people, it's what they look like. Now, I've never been pretty. And I'm saying it out loud. I'm not been... Oh, you've never thought you were pretty. I wasn't pretty like that. I wasn't pretty the way girls are pretty. I was cute. I was cute. I can look good. I can fully look good.

50:30But that was not my… You weren't the traditional notion of pretty. That was not my ticket. Yeah. And that's very important for me because that was never the thing I relied on. I have succumbed and have talked about it many times to trying all the things. I've sucked the fat. I've cut the fat. I've tried to do the things that people do that everybody's doing. And it doesn't work. There are many things that happen. When you say it doesn't work. It doesn't work, first of all, because the self-esteem issue, because you ultimately are looking in the mirror and realizing you've used something outside of yourself to change something to make you, quote better, but you're not better because you're still the same person before as you were before.

51:18I think it actually makes you feel fraudulent. And I think it creates self-hatred. And for me, accepting that I look the way I look is part of self-love. Now, I did that magazine, as you know, years ago, More Magazine, where I took off my clothes. And the reason I did that is because I was a cover girl of magazines. And again, people were comparing themselves to me the same way I would compare myself to someone else. And I know what it feels like to look at a picture of a beautiful woman and go, oh, I'm never going to look like that. And so the one thing we haven't brought up at all is that I also write books for children.

52:05And the books I write for children are about things. They're not just nothing. They're about issues and topics that plague children as much as they plague adults. I'd written a book about self-esteem. It was called I'm Gonna Like Me Letting Off a Little Self-Esteem. It was about self-love. How do you get it? Mm-hmm. Esteemable acts is how you get self-esteem. It's back to your question of young people. They don't feel like I don't know what to do. Do something for someone else. Boom. There you go. Mm-hmm. The dopamine hits. You're like, you're filling up with goodness. It changes the way you do.

52:47So I'm promoting a book for children about self-esteem. And I was doing the cover of More Magazine. and I realized I was a liar. Because if I was paying attention to what I wrote, I wouldn't have done plastic surgery. I wouldn't have done liposuction. So I said, you know what? I'm going to take a picture of me in my undies with no good light, no makeup, no hair. I'm going to stand there au natural, and you're going to take my picture, and then you're going to let me get all dolled up, but you're going to have to print those two pictures side by side. And you're going to have to say how long it took, how much money it took, how many people were involved.

53:35And then I'll do that. And that was something that was in 2001. We're in 2026. That was unheard of. But that was even then me understanding that what we're selling is fraudulent. It has only gotten crazier. And by the way, I'm not proselytizing. I know that some people have, like, I know there's a lot of weight loss questions out there right now. If it actually helps people be healthier, God bless them.

54:21Well, Jamie, we have a listener question. As Jennifer Lewis said, I talk too much. Way too much. I do.

54:31Craig Robinson:You're in between two opinionated women. We have a listener question. A G. A G. A G. Gee, my gee. I'm telling you right now. Sorry. That's okay. Craig, what do you want? I would like you to hear our listener question from Madeline and maybe offer some opinions. Okay. We have a question from Madeline in Boston. Okay. I am entering my senior year of college, and it feels like my generation is unsure what the point is in a time and world that is full of greed, unfairness, and loneliness. How do you find purpose and drive to work towards your interests and goals when it often feels like there are only certain routes to be successful and sustain a happy lifestyle from Madeline in Boston?

55:15Craig Robinson:Oof. Well, I mean, that's the question, right? Purpose. That's right. Purpose. Ultimately, it's find purpose. that when you say or are feeling that you can't find your path to the purpose, my experience with people over and over again is put yourself in the path of anything. Put yourself in the path of love. Put yourself in the path of work. Put yourself in the path of purpose. Like, again, volunteer. You want to feel purpose? Go to a children's hospital. and offer to volunteer to be one of the helpers that work in hospitals. The need is great out there in the world. I think finding your purpose is putting yourself in the path of it.

56:11You may not know what it is. I am a living example of that nothing in my life represents what I thought or had even a fantasy what my life would be. I had no idea. I didn't have a purpose. Keep your mind open. And so for me, that's, you find your purpose by putting yourself in the path of it. I just feel like people keep thinking purpose is going to come to them.

56:39Craig Robinson:That's right. Love is going to come to them. Work is going to come to them. Success is going to come to them. And it is not. You have to go to it for it. You have to go for it. I love that. Um, I'd want, what's our question? Madeline, to also think very carefully about how we, how she's defining purpose, right? Because I think that's some of the confusion, um, these days because purpose in this day and age right now, this moment in time is fame, money, um, uh, you know, more. It's all stuff. It's acquiring. It's superficial. So when we talk about purpose, I think we are talking about something much more altruistic, the dopamine hit that comes with engaging with other people.

57:45Craig Robinson:So I want her to think beyond stuff. Go to school, get your degree if you can afford it. Have a good career. Be able to support yourself. But I know too many people who have all of that and more. The billionaires in the world, the millionaires, the people who are famous, the people who have it all, the people that you look at and think, well, I want their purpose. and what they're doing isn't making them happy or whole. It's not giving them self-esteem. You know, in fact, it's doing the opposite. So I want Madeline to think about working outside of herself. And by the way, Madeline, tough name to have after Lily Allen's album.

58:31Oh, yeah. Craig doesn't understand that one. You know what? I'm going to play the whole thing for you. It's going to blow your mind. It's so genius. Talk about a G. It's a G. Anyway, but before we began this, you know, I've talked a lot about like my life. But the truth is I'm also a mom. I'm a mother.

58:55Craig Robinson:Yes. Of two. I've raised two children from birth through uncharted waters because I had no role model to show me how to do it. And every human being is different. And there's been difference in our path with our children. And our children were born through adoption. And our family was built through adoption. And we were talking at the beginning of the podcast. And the truth is, all of this emotionality that I have is really rooted in being their mother. Oh my God, don't make me cry. But the truth is that the greatest lessons, the hardest days ever in my life, ever, have been being a parent. Yeah.

59:51And now a grandparent. There we go. And we were talking before, and I needed to call my daughter and her husband to ask if it was okay. Mm-hmm. but the idea that I would be this person at this age, excuse my French, forget the movies, forget the things, forget the shiny things. The shiniest thing is a child.

1:00:21Craig Robinson:Yes. Oh, my God. The greatest gift is a child. Yeah. And getting the privilege of raising them and learning how to help someone through their life. And my husband and I became grandparents to our eldest daughter and her husband.

1:00:50And their baby boy was born in December.

1:00:59And it was a week after Rob and Michelle. Yeah. And Rob and Michelle are her godparents. And they died on her birthday. And my beautiful daughter, who loved them, as we all did, managed to be able to metabolize that grief and sadness, as we all have had to do, obviously. Nothing greater than their children. But as close friends, and I know colleagues and friends and people we all admired. And then my daughter and her husband brought their son to this world a week later. And life on life's harshest terms and life on life's most beautiful terms. Perfect terms. and the reason I brought it up is I remember where I was the day your husband was elected president because my daughter called me from a party that she and her friends were at.

1:02:22My daughter was in college and I remember where I was sitting in a hotel talking on the phone with my daughter about the possibility that the world was going to change because of the election and because of you and your husband stepping up saying, we're here to help you. And I remember where I was that day. And now that daughter has brought a little grandson into our lives and the joy. Talk about I never thought I would have children. I never thought in my wildest dreams I would be a grandma, a granny. Granny. I want to be granny. Granny. But so it has just been an extraordinary connection. And when I called my daughter today to say, hey, I'm about to do this.

1:03:16We have never talked about it. It's been a private matter. but we live in a world many people know in our circle. Yeah. Many, many people know that, you know, we're grandparents. One of these days, somebody's going to say something and I am getting to say it. And when I called my daughter and said, you know, I'm about to do this thing. I think it's going to come up. How would you feel about me talking about it?

1:03:51and she said tell her I love her my daughter Annie said tell her I love her you are loved and and so respected that she would say yes mom you can talk about it to Michelle Obama. Because she's a G. Because she loves you. Yeah. Because you represented love in the world and you brought love to the White House and beyond. And so it's really thrilling to me that the first time I'm going to say to the universe that I became a granny is here with you and that she said that I could do it because it was you, because of what you've represented to her and her generation of young women and how much respect we have for you and your husband.

1:04:59You too. You too.

1:05:01Craig Robinson:You too, Craig. Thank you. Your aura is very strong. because we know from the ring and I just I'm I I that's anyway beautiful that's the truth that that is the truth for that's what she said to me for Madeline and Madeline I'm so sorry no but this is the the point being that like so many wonderful things have happened to all of us in the world so many tangible things, but knowing that you can impact people's lives in that way, like that's purpose. And that's a purpose that sustained you through ugly stuff and name calling and lies. And it fills you up fully. And I want young people to understand that, right?

1:06:01Craig Robinson:Like you don't, like money doesn't buy that impact, you know? Titles don't give it to you. It's how you show up in the world that matters. And the only thing people are going to remember at the end. That's right. And that's the shiny thing. That's to me. Yeah. That's what Madeline should be working towards. That's what we all should be working toward. For sure. And that's what you and your husband work toward. And that's the gift that you guys gave us. And that was the hope that you offered us. And I believe that, well, I know you've changed the world for the better. And I believe that the times are going to change.

1:06:45And I think our better minds are going to start paying attention to the corruption, the greed, the avarice, the hatred, the misogyny, the homophobia, the violence. Xenophobia. The violence perpetrated by this administration in the name of America. I believe that will change. And I believe the example that we will lead toward is the example you and your husband give us. So if I get to say nothing else on this, I got to say that to your face. Thank you. very much for everything that you have done for all of us.

1:07:28Craig Robinson:And you too, Craig. What, Craig? Thank you. Thank you. What, Craig? Hey, sometimes you just have to get rebounds. You don't score. You don't have to score. Sometimes you just play D. And by the way, there's your gift to Madeline. that's your answer to Madeline that's right sometimes you're just the you are just the teammate and you can be a good teammate you are a good teammate Jamie thank you thank you for this this was powerful beautiful thank you

1:08:47I'll see you next time. you get your podcasts.