New Year, Same A*sholes

0:02So are we supposed to start the podcast? one two three patriots gay treats they treats black treats brown treats um i've seen some people requesting some additions to trans treats and i can't remember the rest but all of you are included and anybody else can nim treats fuck off fuck off what's a nim treat nb a non-binary triot oh my gosh that's a good one yeah in b tree it's nimbietriot okay um seth and i are back filling in for jennifer and pumps as you can tell seth is way less endowed than angie and we're sorry you have to look at that my claps are uncaged yeah they are they're let loose yeah okay in place of had its today because they're hard to come up with that is a skill that i think People do not realize how hard that is.

1:00And Jennifer and pumps do it easily every day. I realized there was something very important that I had not shared with our listeners. Okay. So after all this time, it dawned on me that I had never sent pumps the famous BuzzFeed, how gay am I quiz? Oh, yeah. Which I remember taking when I was younger. Have you ever taken it? I have not. We need to have you take it. I need to take it. It's like that moment of panic. You're like, am I fucking gay? And BuzzFeed said, yes, yes, you are. Said yes, sweetie. Yes, if you're even here at all, you're gay. So anyways, I sent it to Poms to take the test. And I'll pop this up right here on the screen.

1:39She sends me her results. And it just says, very bold, kind of gay with a pride flag behind it. And it says, you're kind of gay. You really enjoy having sexual experiences with people of all sexes. frankly the one could turn out to be a member of either sex bisexuality it's a party to which everyone is invited okay i agree with this wholeheartedly from a pumps perspective i think she's found the one and i think it's pumps she's pump sexual she's pump sexual so she's bisexual in the fact that she has found pumps yeah she knows what she likes We have a lot of pump sexuals out there. Oh, my God. I mean, that comment section is full of them.

2:23Our email is full of them. That girl, and she doesn't do anything about it. She doesn't use it. Like water off a duck's bed. It really is a dry duck. Okay, the other thing I have prepared for you guys really quick before we kick it to some of our favorite moments is people don't get to see you enough on screen. And so I went through our YouTube comments. I searched up Seth to see what I could find, see what people are saying about you. Okay. So I'm going to read you a couple of these. All right. Ernest Bruce says, I love these three blonde bombshells. Cute, smart, fierce. They bring a smile and warmth to my face and heart.

2:58It must have been I and the ladies that day. Uh-huh. You would think. But then they pressed enter, enter, enter. And way down below, they added, I like you too, Seth. Oh, okay, okay, okay. So, yeah. I'm not a blonde bombshell, but. Blonde. I am blonde, yep. Okay, this other one says, Seth, Jen's son Seth is helping out? Cool. Thanks, Seth. We do all kind of look like a weird dysfunctional family. We do. When Jen and I would travel together, like walk around, people always thought we were mother-daughter. I said, no, we're grandma-daughter. Grandma-granddaughter. We're grandma-handler. Yeah. Okay, this one says, I like this one.

3:41Who is Seth? Where is Kylie? I'm parasocially impacted by change. I absorbed Kylie. No, Kylie and I are actually one in the same. It's interchangeable, really. Okay. So now we are going to play you a couple of our favorite guests from the 2025 year, or as Pumps would say, 2020, 2025. She's working on it. I've noticed she's gotten better. Yep. Yep. So I'll kick it off with my favorite guest of this year. I knew I was going to love this lady. I bought her book. I was so excited for it to sit on my shelf because I don't read. And she did not disappoint. And my favorite guest is E. Jean Carroll. E.

4:26Jean, we're going to move on to our mega hit game. It's called Had It or Hit It. Oh, my God. Welcome to Had It or Hit It. I would hit it. Had it. Had it. I hit it every day, sometimes twice a day. Okay. Had it or hit it, dick pics. girl you know if i wanted a dick pic i would like to receive a dick pic but it's like the cat bringing in a dead rat and dropping right in your lap so i've had it with dick pics had it i mean what's amazing to me is i i have gotten just a very few in my life and then i've had friends send me theirs. And I'm just like, what the fuck? Did they think that your response is like, oh baby, I want to come ride it.

5:19I mean, like it's so shocking. Wait, hold up. You've received dick pics? Yes. Just one. What? It was on Instagram, like a direct message. What? Somebody's DMing you dick pics on Instagram? This was a long time ago when I first got an Instagram. I don't even know who it was. Like it wasn't somebody I knew. It was just like a rando. No, that's right. Random dick pics. That's the essence of a dick pic. I was so terrified, but then I have a girlfriend that gets them all the time and she'll send them and we're all just like, she'll send them in a group text with no warning. And we're just all like, Jesus Christ, why did you put this in here?

5:55Well, we know why men send them because they think that women are wired like they are. Men think they would like to get a picture of our breasts. So what we'll do is here's a gift. I'll give you this and then you'll give me a picture of your vagina. That's how they think. They just, if it, you know what, if they'd send us a dick pic of a dick we know and that we have warm feelings towards, that would be a nice dick pic. But not a random like Angie received. Not a random. No. So terrifying. Okay. had it or hit it aphrodite oh love it hit it aphrodite is the name of my shotgun which i uh-huh yep somebody did their research yeah yeah old aphrodite sits by my bed that's what i do yeah do you uh target practice or anything with your shotgun for kicks well i i haven't recently but i have of course because I have to know how to shoot.

7:03Right. Because they were coming after you like crazy. I mean, it was terrifying. Yeah. Hence, Aphrodite. Okay. Had it or hit it, revenge? Well, I think we've got to.

7:22I think we've got to hit it. I think we've got to hit it because I think this is the last stand. It's being torn apart at the seams, our country. Yes. No. Are we going to sit still for that? No. We have to have a little bit of iron in our guts. And what gives that feeling? Revenge. I agree. Okay. Had it or hid it? Cheerleading. Oh, can't you tell? Look at me. I'm sitting on a ball right now. Oh, you are? Keeping your core all tight. Wait, pump the brakes. throughout the filming of this whole podcast you've been doing a cord exercise yeah yeah yeah i'm doing this ladies i'm doing this that's what i'm doing i'm doing that's impressive that's impressive i don't have great core strength but that i'm impressed no and also gives the energy it gives the energy yes i loved you i was get ready to fall and bend to me, Miss Cheerleader USA.

8:30Oh my gosh. Royalty, ladies. Ready? Okay. I mean, wow. You know, 1964. A trailblazer at that. You know, Pumps here was an all-American cheerleader, her cheerleading camp and had a hyperextended toe touch. Back in the day. Back in the 80s. yeah wait a minute i i angie what this is that i knew we were bonded eugene i knew it i knew it i knew it you can do the tote now which one no two we back back in the day we called him uh i think a russian a russian we called it a russian yeah we call it russian and then there was the tiger with the hands behind you you touch your legs behind you when you do the sea jump yeah no I never did that.

9:20What about a Herky? Did you do a Herky? Oh, a Herky. A Herky came to our cheerleading thing. Herky Herkimer. Wasn't that his name? Herkimer. Yes. Herkimer. I did not know that was real. Yeah. That's why it's called the Herky because the guy that invented it, I think his name was like Herbie Herkimer or Herky Herkimer or something like this. Yeah. He's from my era. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It was the contest was down in Cypress Gardens, Florida. and part of the Miss Cheerleader USA contest was we modeled are you ready for this southern gowns shut up so it was a pageant where you did cheerleading and then modeled yes I love it that is some drag queen shit right there I mean that is straight up drag show I'm here for it i won that man oh i bet you did she wasn't fucking around she went down there she got took names kicked ass and we water skied we watered that was another thing in the competition yeah no not any competition but part of the uh you know thing they got let me ask you this the water skiing were you doing like a pyramid like that would be the thing but you know half of us could barely get up on the ski so that we did that but they what yeah the water skiing was part of the of the pageant it was brilliant oh my gosh that's i love it i got a big scholarship oh wonderful excellent yeah no and it was the first national championship that indiana university had ever won so i was like oh you were hot shit you were a big bitch on campus yeah oh you have no

11:06walking around there. HBIC. Yep, that's it. Oh, I love it. Okay. Had it or hit it, Jeff Bezos.

11:19Boy, I am divided on Jeff Bezos because he's done so much good. He's put books in the hands of so many people who never read before. I mean, your book has been an Amazon bestseller. Your latest has been an Amazon bestseller. And so it's providing you with income so you can feed your families. So Angie can breastfeed 24 hours a day. No, I'm just, I'm upset about his dark turn. Yeah. Yes. I'm just very upset about it. It makes no sense. I just, I mean, And Laura Sanchez's boobs make more sense than Jeff Bezos turning dark. Here's the thing, E.G. This goes back to my point when you were talking about the male jurors.

12:07Something about Trump unlocks the worst impulses in people. Yes. Jeff Bezos. What does he have? Two, three hundred billion dollars. Yeah. Let's say he pays 20 million dollars more a year in taxes. It's not going to affect jack shit in his life. But something about proximity and interacting with Trump makes people worse and or his supporters, the more they justify and excuse the titty baby, the whining, the immoral, fucked up shit, the worse they become. I've never seen anything like it. I haven't either. Jeff Bezos, think about it. You could leave your thumbprint on this globe. as I was a billionaire and I did all of these things, but I decided to pay my employees more than anybody else and change the way we pay laborers.

12:57But no, like Elon Musk, him, they call him now a MAGA Mark Zuckerberg. Think about this. Mark Zuckerberg, gajillionaire, goes on Joe Rogan. I'll never get over this. I talk about it all the time. And he says, I'm just so relieved that Trump is back in power because I feel like men have been neutered in the workplace. And I'm like, what the fuck are you talking about? You neutered? Are you kidding me? The whole system is set up for you to just walk into it. It's crazy how much worse people become after interacting or - He said that? Yes. Mark Zuckerberg neutered. Wow. This is why we're, listen, you know that$83.3 million?

13:43that I'm being given by Trump? Plus interest. Plus interest. I'm going to be given it to help women get our rights back. That's where that$83.3 million is going. You know, that's it. I don't need the money. You know, that is not right. I'm just stunned that Mark Zuckerberg said that, that his reality is so warped. Right. Totally. That's the thing. But then juxtaposed, we were talking about Jeff Bezos, juxtapose jeff bezos with his ex-wife mckenzie um salute she's donating money left and right you know what she's donating to a lot of philanthropists don't donate to this she's donating to social justice causes she's yes yes yes and if you look at the money that she's giving and she's quietly doing it right she's not out in the news having written out the city of venice having some circle jerk of a wedding that's just obscene.

14:41She's quietly donating. And then you look at Melinda Gates and then you look at the ex-wife or the widow of Steve Jobs. And I can't remember her name. She owns The Atlantic. And she's making sure journalism goes out. And so here now we add E. Jean Carroll to this list of boss bitch philanthropists that are putting their money where their mouth is and donating to the causes that really lift us all up. And I love you for that so much. Thank you. Well, thank you, Jennifer. Because you know what? We've got I've got everything I need. I don't need it anymore. What's what do you we don't need more stuff.

15:21Yeah. But women need us. We've lost half our rights in the South. We live there. Yeah. Oh, that's right. You're in a red state. Yeah. Oh, what are abortion rights? How are they doing in Oklahoma? There's none. None. Zero. Oh. Are you at the 13 weeks, the 12 weeks, or the no week? No exceptions. No exceptions. None. Not rape, not incest, nothing. We've got to turn that around. This, we've got, no, this is not, how far do the women in Oklahoma have to travel? Well, Oklahoma is a big state. It's a big state. So they have to travel to either like New Mexico, Colorado or Kansas. But here's what's so tragic about these laws is they're not an attack on Angie has a daughter.

16:08I have two sons. She has a couple of sons, too. But out of the two of us, there's only one daughter. If her daughter has a uptocket pregnancy or something that she would need to have seek care or what for whatever her own personal reasons, Angie's going to buy her plane ticket and she's going to fly her somewhere. where she's going to receive the care she needs. So this isn't, it's not just an attack on women. It's an attack on poor women. And when you think about what MAGA Christian values. I've heard you do that. Oh, this is your thing. These MAGA Christians, E. Jean, these MAGA Christians, it is an attack on the marginalized and the cruelty.

16:46And I'm not religious. And I don't know why my atheist parents raised me in the bubble belt, but nonetheless they did. But these MAGA Christians are so antithetical to the central character of the Bible who was, he spoke out against the accumulation of wealth. He spoke for lifting people out of poverty. He spoke for helping the sick, helping the needy. And then you look at that dipshit Moses Mike Johnson, the most religious speaker of the house we've ever had. And he votes for that abomination of a bill, which is this whole MAGA movement is an attack on the poor. And if I were a Christian, I would be so furious at these MAGA Christians.

17:28But they don't know it, Jennifer. They do not know it. It's not their fault. They're in their news bubble and nobody can get through. That's why, as you say, as you said, the facts are not going to get through. Treating them with dignity and then offering them a way out of this cult where we see them will help. So your first idea, that's what we do, because it's happening all over the world. You know that. No, no, no. It's happening everywhere. But there's also been, surprisingly, and this has given me some hope, there's also been, ever since this acceleration of Trump's second term, there's also been a Trump backlash globally, where countries that were heading kind of towards an authoritarian, those authoritarian wannabes are losing.

18:17so um i'm hopeful that we can find the humanity that connects us all because it's just you know it's it's so crazy to watch i talked about this earlier we were filming you know you go about your life and you hear a song that you like and you're kind of dancing in your car or something you're throwing a ball with your dog and then it hits you like alligator alcatraz like oh what we're doing that like yeah no and then it hits you and then it's this really weird slow march into fascism and authoritarian authoritarianism because so much of my life can feel the same and i'm doing the same thing it is the same it your life is the same right meanwhile in la they're dragging fathers who are hard working away from their children the guys are wearing masks and they've got bulletproof vests on we don't know who they are they come in and drag fathers away Then they drag their mother away.

19:11The kids are left with nobody. It's on. And we're not. Everybody in the United States is not out marching. I'm really. God, are we fucking lazy? I'm telling you, we've got our phones and we've got our entertainment. We're watching Netflix and we won't go out because his father is being dragged out. You know, we just put it down. We got it. No, it's something's the matter with Americans. were been entertained into hip were hypnotized we just don't stand up anymore i you know it's just amazing i mean really she makes me want to buy a gun she i don't know what i was expecting when i heard that eugene carroll was going to come on but she blew my expectations out of the water She's so funny.

20:09She's so wacky and willing to goof. She was so awesome. She's living up in the mountains with her shotgun and her log. Her whole setting was just perfect in a log cabin. I'm obsessed with her. Okay. So my favorite guest this year, I was a big fan of her before we had her on as a podcast guest. And now she's just become like family to the show. She's friends with Jen and Pumps. And that is Ruth Ben-Ghiott. And I had watched every single interview of hers. She's so smart. And here's a little clip from her episode. It's kind of we were talking to another guest how weird it is with what's going on.

20:53It's like you're living a split screen. Like on the one hand, we just saw you before we came in here and we exchanged pleasantries and everything's normal and great. And then you can leave here and look at the news headlines and you see what's happening, you know, that Trump is going after the Fed and the three hour long schmooze fest in the cabinet room. And you think what on earth is happening? And clapping for Putin. Yes. And military looking vehicles on the streets of American cities. All of that. I know even though I study this, the split screen is the same for me, obviously. You know, you go to the store, you text with your kid, and then the difference is I've been studying this for years.

21:41I've been able to predict sometimes where it might go and what the examples of history are and also foreign countries that can help us get through this and also what we can just do in our daily lives to feel more prepared and to cope with the extra stress. What's your top red flag that you're seeing right now? I know there are many, but the top maybe three red flags that you're seeing right now. I think one is that we've never had an American president who's so openly a fan of dictators. Right. Whether they're left wing or right wing. And this is really important because although inside countries, right wing leaders always talk about the radical left.

22:30But at the highest level, when you're talking about relations of dictators, they do the same things. So Donald Trump is very, he's a fan of Putin. And he's also a fan of Xi Jinping, who, and now most recently, when the South Korean head of state just went to the White House. Trump lectured him on how great the North Korean leader is, who's a murderous communist of one of the last, you know, kind of failed state dictatorships. So that is new. Even, you know, very conservative leaders such as Ronald Reagan, he was the one who told Gorbachev, tear down the wall. He was a hero in that regard. So this is totally new.

23:13And then, you know, going on with that, I'm very concerned about taking away all of the things that maybe we took for granted that government did. Disaster relief. My mother's Social Security benefits were terminated. She's 92 and she has dementia. And I'm trying to get them back for her. So that's happening to many people. Things that we expected, good things that government did, that maybe we had the luxury in America of not having to think about, many of them are disappearing. And that's also because of what Elon Musk did and Doge. And Doge is still there in 38 government agencies. It hasn't gone away.

23:59So that I'm worried about. And then third, because a lot of my book, Strongman, is about military coups. I really don't like the mobilization, the politicization of the military. We have one of the mightiest militaries in the world that we could be very proud of. It was one of the most popular institutions in America. It defends us. And to try and have troops policing civilians, which is a goal apparently, I'm really worried about that. I'm very worried about that. And I see that with Trump. I've always thought he's not organized or competent enough to do all this, like the fake news, like he lucked into calling, you know, undermining the news, undermining facts.

24:51And then I hear you talk. If you'll just talk a little bit about how undermining the judiciary, you know, radical left judges are doing this, how that leads the American society to come unglued. I'm so glad you mentioned that because one of the things that keeps our society together, whether it's just turning out in our communities for, I don't know, our kids' sports games or politics is trust and a common understanding of rules and respect for authorities. I'm a progressive person, but I have great respect for authorities. And what we're seeing, and this is what autocrats do, is Trump and his colleagues have been trying to discredit every kind of authority that is connected with institutions, but also from judges, prosecutors, and trying to discredit democratic versions of the judiciary, of the civil service.

25:51These are people who make government run. They don't make a lot of money. They're heroes in their own way. But also teachers, librarians, any kind of educator, doctors, think of what's going on. Now it's going to become harder to get COVID vaccines and other kinds of medical help. So any kind of authority that was respected and people looked up to, like, again, I'm going to repeat, like the school librarian. Who doesn't like the school librarian? Right. But those all have to be discredited because authoritarian states want to politicize everything and actually disrupt areas like schools and even faith institutions that bring many types of people together.

26:42OK, so we have him federalizing D.C. and he has outwardly said his ambitions are to move to Chicago and other places. We have him targeting the Fed. He is silencing dissenting economic data. He has loyalty tests, executive overreach. And then he does this political theater with the Oval Office, how he's made it all bougie, you know, in his Marie Antoinette era, if you will. And then he does the cabinet meeting where all the sycophants go on for three and a half hours. So my question is, obviously, all of these things are terrible. But for our listener, and I think probably a lot of our listeners, we have a lot of younger listeners, you probably have parents that identify as I'm socially liberal, but fiscally conservative.

27:34This is a very American thing that you hear a lot of people say trying to have their cake and eat it, too. I'm not going to get into why I don't think that's a sustainable thing. But a lot of people vote with that. when you undermine the Fed and when you undermine the judiciary for the fiscal conservative voter, what happens to the economy when you undermine both of those things, when a company cannot take a contract to court and try it? And when you have inflated economic numbers, what will happen to what was the bedrock of this country, which is our economy? What happens to that with these things that I've just listed, Ruth?

28:13Yeah, I'm not an expert on the economy, but again, it's a question of trust. If you undermine confidence in our regulatory and financial institutions, including the Fed, if you try and politicize them, if you pass measures, avoiding Congress and just doing it as executive orders, practically, that are harming businesses, all the tariff stuff, and many of the things that are being done are actually allowing China to succeed to the point that The Economist, which is not a progressive liberal rag magazine, had a cover a few months ago that had a blue, as though it was a MAGA hat, but it was blue.

28:59And it said, make China great again. Because the Economist, specialists in economic policy, judged that what Trump was doing For example, wrecking the wind, all of the progressive energy, clean energy. It's allowing China to go into those places, to those sectors. And small businesses are going to be harmed. And then also, we've got to think about ripple effect things. Everything from gun violence to disaster. If you don't have disaster relief because you've cut FEMA and all the other things, then businesses are going to be communities are going to be harmed people can't go to work also if people are sick because you have a health and human services head who seems to want to spread disease right does that is going to harm the economy because people are sick look what happened during covid and it doesn't have to be a pandemic and so all of these things that are being done there are people who say they're being done to wreck america that that president trump Trump, and this is new, is not on the side of America.

30:09He is allied with Putin. That's why he was clapping. And other leaders who are our adversaries, they want America to fail. With regard to Putin, if you look at what you could say that maybe Russia and Putin are ahead of what Trump's peer, apparently what Trump's ambitions are. So when you see the humiliation exercise of Tim Cook, where they come into the White House, the oligarchs are arriving one by one for Trump's show and tell trophy hour. It was awful. And they're humiliating themselves. Share with our listener what happened to Putin's oligarchs. What happens once they come in and kiss the ring?

30:50What happens after that, Ruth? I couldn't believe what I was watching because in my book, Strongman, I have countless, I describe describe countless situations that are the same, whether it's Mobutu's ministers in the Congo, and they had to wear a certain kind of shirt that he told them to wear. And if they didn't wear it, they would be demoted. So it's like this total control. And the thing about the strongmen is that there is no end to their adulation that they need. They need constant acclaim. And it backfires. And this is universal. It's universal. It's crazy. Mussolini did it. Do they all bougie up their offices like that, too?

31:32So somebody on social media who was from Central Africa, I don't know this person, but he posted a picture of Trump's redo of the Oval Office. And I was thinking that it's like a temple to himself. Right. Because it has all these like fake gold kind of trophy looking things behind him. And so this person said, oh, this looks like the office of Bokasa, who was a murderous dictator in Central Africa. And so I went back into my notes and pictures that I had for research on my book, because this is the people I studied, Gaddafi, Saddam Hussein. They all have these palaces and they're full of real, a lot of times it's real gold, but they make them into temples to themselves because their egos are never satiated.